Thanksgivingmanship: Your Guide to Surviving the SJW Imbeciles Who Have Spent a Week Reading Vox Articles About How to Survive You

Reposted from Last Year. If I can think of a Trump Election update to this, I'll post it next week. But no promises.

Oxford Don Stephen Potter introduced the world to the principles of Gamesmanship [don't comment on old posts, the system will ban you] the way to win at games by resort to cheap ploys which were very close to cheating without being technically cheating. He later expanded his inquiries into the general field of "Lifemanship," the discipline of embracing life in a dickish and hostile spirit, sabotaging social rivals without quite breaching social etiquette.

Given that the progressive elder-children-yet-not-quite-adults you'll be encountering this Thanksgiving (who I will henceforth refer to as "grownchildren") will be armed to the teeth with Vox explainers and Obamacare propaganda, I herewith humbly submit these first sketches of a new branch of Lifemanship I call "Thankgivingmanship," which I define as the gentle art of insulting the stupid without alerting them to the fact that they've been insulted at all.

It is the goal of the dedicated Thanksgivingman, then, to achieve the sublime art of giving offense without offense being taken.

My basic strategy is thus: It would be as rude of you as it is rude of your cretinous grownchildren kin to allow a Thanksgiving dinner into a stupid game of Rachel Maddow Talking Points and their rebuttals.

So, rather than confront the unemployed idiots who will be assailing you, I propose instead to superficially avoid conflict and engagement on their dummy mouthflappings, and appear instead to agree with them.

But -- and here is the point -- a skilled Thanksgivingman will only appear to agree with the grownchildren to feeble intellects, such as those possessed by the grownchildren themselves. Instead of disagreeing with them -- which will cause argument and anger -- you will instead claim to agree with them, while in fact contradicting them, subverting them, of baffling them with statements that nearly, but do not quite, make sense.

Our definitions and mission now established, we turn to the first of our three primary Thanksgivingmanship gambits:

The Neutral or Nonsensical Statement Disguised as Agreement.Progressives do not process language the same way human beings do; they chiefly adduce meaning from tone and body language, like dogs.

This means that you can say many things which are either irrelevant, nonsensical, or otherwise not in agreement with the progressive subcreatures you're temporarily amidst so long as you deliver your words with a warm smile and a lot of nodding.

You may also use uptalk to express an insincere solidarity. As with dogs and babies, progressives find artificially high-pitched vocal tones to be soothing and possibly a prelude to Walkies and Snackies.

Whenever a progressive grownchild says something stupid and ignorant, which will be always, do not engage on the merits. Progressive grownchildren will become highly emotional and agitated at the slightest show of disagreement, and may wet the floor or claw at the furniture.

Instead, say something which is either neutral or nonsensical (which successfully communicates your true beliefs to other real human beings capable of deciphering obvious meaning) while deploying smiling, nodding, and uptalk to falsely convey agreement with to the more-stunted intellect of the grownchild.

For example, if a progressive grownchild says, "Rachel Maddow is just so amazing," you can respond by nodding and saying "Absolutely, Rachel Maddow is without doubt a mammal." (Or: "A mammal...?")

Possible responses to common grownchild mouthchatter include:

"Well I see that the 'Faux Noise Machice' has gotten everyone riled up about so-called 'terrorism' again."

"Doubtless! Terrorists only win when allow them to make us afraid, or dead." (Or: "Afraid, or dead...?")

"Can't people see that stupid cons are doing Just What ISIS Wants us to do?"

"It's so obvious-- the attacks in Paris weren't just an attack on human lives. They were an attack on our shared human capacity to be alive." ("To be alive, and stuff...?")

This is a very simple one, which can be deployed in a variety of contexts:

"None of this is Obama's fault -- he's doing the best he can to keep America out of another War of Choice."

"Boy that Obama-- he is really something, isn't he?"

As the evening wears on, and you are preparing to depart, you may become somewhat more blatant in your stealth insults, like so:

"I just read an explainer about this on Vox."

"Today's world is so remarkable! When I was young, we had to read books and derive our own thinking for ourselves. What a time to be alive, when sounding vaguely informed is no longer a luxury of the intellectual, but a cheaply assembled ware available to those of more common intellect!"

Fake Statistics. It was my old friend Boston Irish who alerted me to this ticklish little trope, when he observed that no matter how absurd the statistic you proposed to a progressive, if that statistic seemed to call attention to whatever bugaboos xhe was excited about, xhe would respond with a gushing "I know, right?!"

He demonstrated this to me at a party by interrupting a couple of liberals talking, and announcing to them:

"You know, based on current statistics, in ten years, the entire state of California will be homeless."

"Right! I know!" came the response.

By the way, that is not schtick. That is not a joke written for this blogpost. I was really there, he really said that, that really happened.

After having secured the agreement to his obviously-crank "statistics," he turned to me with a slightly arched eyebrow and sipped his beer in quiet triumph.

This propensity of grownchildren to agree to whatever fantastical "studies" and "statistics" you propose to them can be exploited for much private merriment at the holidays.

Other gambits include:

* "You know, the average family of four pays more in ATM fees to the Big Banksters than they spend on rent."

* "By the year 2030, global warming predicts that the entire North American landmass will be flooded by seawater and wolves."

* "99.4% of the world's wealth is controlled by six-tenths of a single person."

* "More people are killed every year by shooting accidentally shooting themselves than who died in all the wars in the world combined, except for the Korean War."

You need to throw that "Except for the Korean War" in at the end because the claim, on its face, is too preposterous, so you deduct out Korean War deaths to bring it into the real of the plausible. (Plausible, that is, for progressive grownchildren.) It makes like you've done the math and just have to make this one little adjustment to get the numbers to work.

You may follow Boston Irish's trope of the obviously-crank "liberal study" claim, or you can try your hand at claims which are simply baffling nonsense:

* "Studies have proven that if you have a gun in your house, you are more in danger of being struck by lightning than being bitten by a rattlesnake. Think about it."

A minor variation of the Fake Statistic ploy is the Fake Profundity gambit, in which you propose some ludicrous "deep thought" which derives not from social science, but from your own personal philosophical inquiry.

For example, this one is best delivered with chin uplifted, Obama-style, and a metaphysical glaze of the eye:

* "For what is it that gives the terrorists power -- their weapons, or our primitive, irrational fear that they will kill us with their weapons?"

It is generally a useful practice to prefix such bits of nonsense with faux-biblical language, such as "For what..." or "Lo" and "Thus and so."

Fake Quotes. Progressives love fake quotes -- they just love dressing up whatever passes for this week's SJW Conventional Wisdom and attributing it to some historic figure.

Generally, these historic figures are very well known, because progressives don't know any historic figures except the very well known. Thomas Jefferson is always a popular choice. For "bad sounding quotes," Hitler is preferred. Napoleon and Marcus Aurelius may be deployed as well, but be prepared for some confused looks as to who it is you're talking about.

Offering a ridiculous quote can bring you and any other lively minds at the table great amusement. Your target will probably not notice the quote is fake, because he is an imbecile, and also because you'll have a serene, self-satisfied smile on your face as you say it, which he will read as "A Fellow Progressive in Discursive Mode."

This minor camouflage will permit you to smuggle huge amounts of nonsense in the guise of Wisdom of the Ancients.

Feel free to subvert your noddingsmiles with messages that are blatantly mottos of the NRA, if only the grownchild could understand simple words, which they cannot.

For example:

"Wasn't it Mahatma Gandhi who said, 'It is not necessarily the first man to shoot who wins the battle, but it is always the last man shooting who wins the day'?"

"As Gertrude Stein said" -- and I should say here that this gambit works best when you pronounce this name, for no particular reason, in an outrageous German accent, as Gaertruude Schteinn.

So, let's begin again: "As Gaertruude Schteinn observed, 'The man who is slowest to arm himself is quickest to savor the bounties of Heaven.'"

Another gambit is to offer up the following quotes, which are applicable in a wide range of situations.

"I forget which scientist said it, maybe Neil DeGrasse Tyson, but it's worth repeating: 'Wars of religion always make me laugh because basically you're fighting over who has the best imaginary friend.'"

Or:

"A great philosopher, Gaertruud Von Schteinn, once said, 'Fear causes hesitation, and hesitation will cause your worst fears to come true'?"

You will get big nods for these Aphorisms of the Sages. You yourself can take pleasure in the knowledge that both quotes are from the movie Point Break, delivered by Johnny Utah (Keanu Reaves) and Bodhi (Patrick Swayze), respectively.

If you get any verbal expressions of agreement, a "hear-hear" or an "amen," you can extend the joke by saying, "In the words of the spiritual master Boddhisatva, 'You can do what you want, and make up your own rules. Why be a servant to the law, when you can be its master...?" or "Six seconds and we're going to be meat waffles.'"

Make this trope your own. Have fun with it. If you want to claim that it was Niccolo Machiavelli who first advised, "Sweep the leg, Johnny," go with it, but try to get your more subtle Fake Quotes in before "going big" like that.

A Final Word. At some point, even an experienced Thanksgivingman will go too far, and give his game away. At that point, there will be sulks and silences, and the Thanksgivingman will have actually failed at his goal, which is to give offense without offense being taken.

In such straits, the Thanksgivingman, in order to be the polite person he wishes to be, will have to apologize -- it is the verminous grownchildren who have come to bicker and strife, after all, not the well-mannered Thankgivingman.

However, for the zealous Thanksgivingman, even an apology can be exploited for further Thanksgivingmanship points.

For example, if the childanimal you are speaking with declares:

"You're micro-aggressing me."

...then be sure to respond,

"Ah, then please sincerely accept my most micro apologies."

Posted by: Ace at 03:46 PM




Comments

(Jump to bottom of page)

1 First?

Posted by: Farmer at November 18, 2016 03:48 PM (3hlFs)

2 Hey, I did it!

Posted by: Farmer at November 18, 2016 03:49 PM (3hlFs)

3 I don't feed those kinds of people

Posted by: NCKate at November 18, 2016 03:49 PM (6UCyk)

4 Well I know you didn't read though the heading

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 03:49 PM (GH68B)

5 OK I'll go get the others.

Posted by: Farmer at November 18, 2016 03:49 PM (3hlFs)

6 No Roger,
No Re-Run,
No Rent!

Posted by: garrett at November 18, 2016 03:50 PM (pyZce)

7 I've been all anti politics at Thanksgiving because there c'mon people can't we at least pretend for one day that there are more important things.

However. Someone reminded me that if you bring up politics and drive people off, more pie for you!

So my position is now this: Stake out the high ground next to the pie and then GAME ON!

Posted by: alexthechick - so so itchy at November 18, 2016 03:51 PM (mf5HN)

8 Happy Friday all!! Can't wait for turkey day. So much to be grateful for!!

Posted by: Beth M at November 18, 2016 03:51 PM (Nvubx)

9 Here is one of my fav from Confucius I believe:

'it's better to light a candle than to curse the darkness'

I dropped that into a Christmas party conversation last year during a bitching session on republicans (liberal co-workers) and it was met with utter silence..while I nodded sagely.

Posted by: IC at November 18, 2016 03:52 PM (a0IVu)

10 JUST TELL THEM THAT TRUMP WILL THROW THEM ALL IN THE CAMPS!!!

Posted by: The Hysterical Sally Kohn at November 18, 2016 03:52 PM (qJhUV)

11 My sister voted for Hilary but I think she's the only one.

She's also more pro-life than I am. But Trump said pussy so......

Posted by: Nigel West Dickens at November 18, 2016 03:52 PM (FqgrG)

12 I don't feed those kinds of people



Amen.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 03:53 PM (o+pgY)

13 Do not neglect to drink. Or gloat.

And guilt. Apply guilt liberally:

"Well aren't you just the little ray of sunshine?"

"Why do you upset grandma? She wants to see us all happy and you have to do that."

Posted by: *Mikey NTH - The Outrage Outlet Salutes the Reign of the Golden Scalp Weasel! All Stock 20% Off! at November 18, 2016 03:53 PM (hLRSq)

14 I love Thanksgiving. It's my favorite holiday. No one in my family is a SJW, so I start off thankful.

Posted by: huerfano at November 18, 2016 03:53 PM (jkkMG)

15 Lib SILs FB status: still black. I can assume that sometime in the next 5 days I will receive an email forbidding political discussion at the dinner she will be hosting. Her brother is a YUGE and completely irrational Hillary supporter and may be wearing a black armband when he joins us from New Orleans.

Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 03:54 PM (tHwdc)

16 Whenever people tell me how much they like Rachel Maddow my response to them is what a handsome young man he is.

Posted by: Milk H at November 18, 2016 03:54 PM (gPMz3)

17 Here is one of my fav from Confucius I believe:

'it's better to light a candle than to curse the darkness'





"Never trust a fart over 50".

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 03:54 PM (o+pgY)

18 My nephew tried this shit a few years ago. We made him eat out on the porch.
Cold out there that day...

Posted by: tu3031 at November 18, 2016 03:54 PM (qJhUV)

19 Simply put out jars of Vaseline. Butt hurt? Soothe yourself.

Posted by: Safety Pin Brigayd at November 18, 2016 03:54 PM (FXW24)

20 This year's conversation at our office party would be centered around 'there is no way Trump can close down the EPA' - that conversation has started already so I'm going to have to come up with something pithy to say.

Posted by: IC at November 18, 2016 03:55 PM (a0IVu)

21
So my position is now this: Stake out the high ground next to the pie and then GAME ON!

Posted by: alexthechick - so so itchy at November 18, 2016 03:51 PM (mf5HN)
---
This is a very Trumpian display of feral alpha aggression. And your superior alpha pie-eating skills will be passed on to the next generation.

Darwin, baby.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 03:55 PM (EnKk6)

22 I love Thanksgiving. It's my favorite holiday. No one in my family is a SJW, so I start off thankful.



Yeah. Both families. Mine and in-laws.
Kinda boring actually.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 03:55 PM (o+pgY)

23 >>My nephew tried this shit a few years ago. We made him eat out on the porch.
Cold out there that day...


I hope you saved your Election Pudding Cup for his dessert, this year.

Posted by: garrett at November 18, 2016 03:56 PM (pyZce)

24 Any self-respecting SJW should not be celebrating Thanksgiving, which is a Christian holiday originating in racist colonialism (literally) resulting in the genocide of the pure and holy indigenous peoples.

Posted by: katya the designated driver at November 18, 2016 03:57 PM (BHMfA)

25 So my position is now this: Stake out the high ground next to the pie and then GAME ON!



Walk in. Claim pie, "MY PIE!" Lick top of pie.

Go relax.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 03:57 PM (o+pgY)

26 You relize agreeing with them will only set them off more don't you?

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 03:57 PM (GH68B)

27 This year's conversation at our office party would be centered around
'there is no way Trump can close down the EPA' - that conversation has
started already so I'm going to have to come up with something pithy to
say.

Yeah. They also said he had no chance of winning...

Posted by: tu3031 at November 18, 2016 03:57 PM (qJhUV)

28 I love Thanksgiving. It's my favorite holiday. No one in my family is a SJW, so I start off thankful.
Posted by: huerfano at November 18, 2016 03:53 PM (jkkMG)

Me too. Aside from a couple of younger progressive relatives (who are very nice people and know not to talk about politics during gatherings), my extended family is almost universally deplorable. Makes for super fun holiday parties.

Posted by: Pug Mahon, Gloaty McGloatface at November 18, 2016 03:57 PM (RwwCT)

29 It will be very quite at Thanksgiving on Politics since I WON. See I am polite, as are most conservatives, in real life. And the left wingers in my family will be to depressed and/or drunk to say anything

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 18, 2016 03:57 PM (dELE3)

30 Simply put out jars of Vaseline. Butt hurt? Soothe yourself.

Posted by: Safety Pin Brigayd at November 18, 2016 03:54 PM (FXW24)

LOL! Maybe I should surreptitiously slip a tube of Preparation H onto the place setting of every liberal.

Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 03:57 PM (tHwdc)

31 Btw, Ace, I love when you're in a good mood.

Posted by: katya the designated driver at November 18, 2016 03:57 PM (BHMfA)

32 15 Lib SILs FB status: still black. I can assume that sometime in the next 5 days I will receive an email forbidding political discussion at the dinner she will be hosting. Her brother is a YUGE and completely irrational Hillary supporter and may be wearing a black armband when he joins us from New Orleans.
Posted by: Miley
----------------

Grab a bundle of Kleenex at Costco on the way there. Walk in and start handing them out.
Then bask in the winning.

Posted by: Chi - #FreeCthulhu at November 18, 2016 03:58 PM (hqlWK)

33 This Thanksgiving is just gonna be me, my spousal unit, and my loser son who boomeranged back into the house. Just us, turkey, mashed potatoes, corn pudding, apple-cranberry chutney, two kinds of pie and the MST3K Thanksgiving marathon. No SJWs to worry about it, although my idiot brother-in-law might stop by on Friday.

Posted by: V the K at November 18, 2016 03:58 PM (O7MnT)

34 We'll end the discussion by puting you to sleep.

Posted by: Detroit Lions at November 18, 2016 03:58 PM (FXW24)

35 Those are all great tactics, so glad I won't have to use any of them.

The day after the election I just wanted to enjoy some celebration food but instead got stuck explaining actual political facts to my LIV cousin. It was such a buzz (and palate) kill.

Next Thursday I will be feasting with fellow travelers.

Life is Good!

Posted by: kallisto at November 18, 2016 03:58 PM (jkmtt)

36 If you have to get up from the table, try this one :

"As the great Charlie Sheen once said, 'Now, if you will be so kind as to excuse me, I am going to go into the bathroom to shoot up.'"

Posted by: garrett at November 18, 2016 03:59 PM (pyZce)

37 well interesting article but not sure you are right. half of the problem with these people is that they think the majority of the world is in agreement with them. better to drive them into an insane rage and make everyone in the family despise them and have them stomp off never to go to family functions.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 03:59 PM (cPsPa)

38 You guys in red states are lucky. It's all drama here in Cali. Lib office mates are so freaked out about a Trump administration, our 401k administrator has called a special meeting in two weeks to discuss the affects of the election on our 401k; special memo went out about 'lets keep our Christmas party a joyful occasion; I got an email from my daughter's school district supervisor today about 'how we embrace students and families of all backgrounds'.

Posted by: IC at November 18, 2016 03:59 PM (a0IVu)

39 >>Walk in. Clam pie, "MY PIE!" Lick top of pie.



Who invited Huma?

Posted by: Chelsea Clinton at November 18, 2016 04:00 PM (pyZce)

40 MAGA hats for all your Secret Santa needs.

Posted by: garrett at November 18, 2016 04:00 PM (pyZce)

41 Well done, Thanksgivingman and mighty funny.

Posted by: washrivergal at November 18, 2016 04:01 PM (CFc5L)

42 It's always good to throw in some Star Trek quotes too.Usually from Spock but you can get by with Picard and Data as well,

Posted by: steevy at November 18, 2016 04:01 PM (r/0kC)

43 Thanksgiving is also my favorite holiday. It's centered around food and sleep and football. What's not to love?


Walk in. Claim pie, "MY PIE!" Lick top of pie.

Go relax.
Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 03:57 PM (o+pgY)



Yeah, that wouldn't stop a single person in my family from still eating the pie.

This year it's just me and Mommy and my dad and om nom nom all the food for meeeeeee. Dad and I are already fighting over who gets what kind of pie and I think I'll just whine at Mommy tonight until she agrees to make both of them. I'm not saying that was my plan all along. I'm not saying it's not either.

A few years back I had a nice full plate at dinner, but nothing too huge. Everyone else fed up and I was getting mocked for not eating more.

Two hours later when everyone else was passed out, I was happily nomming plate number three of leftovers.

Posted by: alexthechick - so so itchy at November 18, 2016 04:01 PM (mf5HN)

44 If anybody says "I wanted to cry after I saw the election results!" I'm going to push away from the table and declare "Your tears and sorrow are meat and drink enough!" and start laughing, ha HA! like the jolly trollop I am.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:01 PM (EnKk6)

45 Pretty much I'm stuck with old style Democrats, the "kids"my age or slightly younger are conservatives. But no SJW's

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 04:01 PM (GH68B)

46 I got an email from my daughter's school district supervisor today about 'how we embrace students and families of all backgrounds'.
Posted by: IC




Lulululululululululu boom! Srsly? Embrace that!

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 04:02 PM (o+pgY)

47 In vino veritas:

"Why should I have to put up with your nonsense right now? Go away."

"Keep this up and you're eating in the garage."

"This is why Trump won."

"Stop libsplaining, that's triggering."

"I think gold trim on the White House would be perfect."

And again:

"President Trump. President. Trump. Pres-i-dent Tr-ump. Say it. Say it. Say it!"

And remember to laugh maniacally.

Posted by: *Mikey NTH - The Outrage Outlet Salutes the Reign of the Golden Scalp Weasel! All Stock 20% Off! at November 18, 2016 04:02 PM (hLRSq)

48 In all honesty,no dumb lefties will be at my Thanksgiving.

Posted by: steevy at November 18, 2016 04:02 PM (r/0kC)

49 Grab a bundle of Kleenex at Costco on the way there. Walk in and start handing them out.

Then bask in the winning.

Posted by: Chi - #FreeCthulhu at November 18, 2016 03:58 PM (hqlWK)

-------------
I think personal lachrimatories are the way to go. I suppose I could collect the tears in a family-sized lachrimatory, though, except I know they'll want to collect and cherish their own.
I HAVE been bathing deplorably all week, you see.

Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 04:02 PM (tHwdc)

50

Let them try. I dont have time for this BS

Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:02 PM (Bnpn+)

51 I'm hosting.

The BILs are pretty cool ... so we'll just go downstairs along with The Senior Scogg and admire the gun cabinet for a bit.

Posted by: ScoggDog at November 18, 2016 04:02 PM (RKJF2)

52 OT

http://www.cnn.com/2016/11/17/us/midland-texas-mammoth-oil-discovery/index.html

Member peak oil?

I member!

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at November 18, 2016 04:03 PM (wkUSq)

53 Hey Horde - just occurred to me. SJW's always say that they will move to Canada if their candidate does not win. Why is it always Canada and never Mexico?

Posted by: Algore at November 18, 2016 04:03 PM (LbXNI)

54

I'm lucky. Every single one of my relatives voted for Trump. Some were registered Democrats.

Woot!

Will be so much fun.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 18, 2016 04:03 PM (qCMvj)

55 Woo Woo Warren now wants PE Trump to withdraw Session's name....these people really are bat shit crazy

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 18, 2016 04:04 PM (dELE3)

56 https://www.pinterest.com/pin/160722280425995504/

Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 04:04 PM (tHwdc)

57

My SIL and BIL, who cried and wailed and called every morning at 5 am to complain, are coming

Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:04 PM (Bnpn+)

58 53 Hey Horde - just occurred to me. SJW's always say that they will move to Canada if their candidate does not win. Why is it always Canada and never Mexico?



Because they're rayciss against little brown people.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 04:04 PM (o+pgY)

59 I have been having a hysterical time at the expense of my more liberal friends by making claims on the terrible things Trump will do. There is nothing, and I mean NOTHING they will not believe. I have successfully gotten away with:

1) As I recently read on Vox, Trump is planning to build concentration camps for all Muslims and undesirable. In Nevada. Probably Area 51.

2) You know of course that Trump is planning on reconstituting the House Committee on Un-American Affairs. Paul Ryan is going to chair it.

3) On Slate I heard that Trump plans to, instead of a wall, just put land mines on the southern border. Think about it. After that, Canada.

I've found adding the idiotic "think about it" is the really funny part. I love watching progressives pretend to think. It's like watching a dog smell a fart.

Posted by: George Orwell's Ghost at November 18, 2016 04:05 PM (UgF8H)

60 This Thanksgiving serve wine in juice boxes. Give them a straw and suggest they suck it up. Bon Scott Appetite!

Posted by: Julia Problem Child at November 18, 2016 04:05 PM (FXW24)

61 53 Hey Horde - just occurred to me. SJW's always say that they will move to Canada if their candidate does not win. Why is it always Canada and never Mexico?
Posted by: Algore at November 18, 2016 04:03 PM (LbXNI)

===================

That's been asked rhetorically more than once.

We need entertainment reporters to ask that of celebrities. The only one to volunteer that is George Lopez, and that's because he's from Mexico (I think).

Where is the Republican donor class in buying women's magazines, sports magazines, and entertainment magazines, by the way?

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at November 18, 2016 04:05 PM (wkUSq)

62 My sister voted for Hilary but I think she's the only one.

She's also more pro-life than I am. But Trump said pussy so......
Posted by: Nigel West Dickens at November 18, 2016 03:52 PM (FqgrG)


Sorry, I don't know your sister, but if she voted for Hillory, she's not pro-life.

Period.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 18, 2016 04:05 PM (Pz4pT)

63 Great post Ace. If they mention Hillary you can chime in w/ faux concern...if they put her in jail I hope it's not for too long, as her health doesn't seem too good.

Posted by: Farmer at November 18, 2016 04:06 PM (3hlFs)

64 My liberal BIL and his hateful far left Democrat worshiping wife hasn't come down for the past two Thanksgivings. I was almost at the point of telling wifey I wold not got to MIL's house for Thanksgiving anymore.


The stupid woman argues with DU talking points and lies.

Posted by: Vic We Have No Party at November 18, 2016 04:06 PM (mpXpK)

65 to discuss the affects of the election on our 401k;

----------

The immediate effect seems to be a larger 401k balance.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:06 PM (gmeXX)

66 I've literally eliminated the problem. The SJW crowd may go elsewhere to get their free dinner.

Posted by: Cn at November 18, 2016 04:06 PM (wczgi)

67

For your vegan relatives with special dietary demands i would suggest molding their Tofurky in the shape of a crow

Posted by: Deplorable Male Logic at November 18, 2016 04:06 PM (lKyWE)

68 There will be no imbeciles at my turkey dinner-unless I count as one for some of my imbecilic moments-but that wouldn't be because of being a SJWhiner. FebelonSpouse and i both voted for Trump and the teen boy who's not old enough to vote didn't like Hillary.

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at November 18, 2016 04:06 PM (tOcW/)

69 I'm going to a big affair and it's red forces/blue forces pretty evenly down the line. Last year we managed to avoid politics but this is an Extinction Level Event and I just know it will come up, first with some passive aggressive remarks, then full volleys of recrimination.

I won't shoot first. I'm a guest.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:06 PM (EnKk6)

70 Sorry, I don't know your sister, but if she voted for Hillory, she's not pro-life.
_______________

That was kinda my point.

Posted by: Nigel West Dickens at November 18, 2016 04:06 PM (FqgrG)

71 Sessions is getting some of that senate "collegiality".

Posted by: steevy at November 18, 2016 04:06 PM (r/0kC)

72 TRUMPSGIVING! IT IS HUUUUUUUUUGE! Giant turkey, loads of dressing, mounds of mashed potatoes, pools of cranberry sauce, barrels of sweet potatoes, tubs of gravy, everything everywhere all the time. Making eating great again!

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:07 PM (cPsPa)

73 Great ideas, but since I'll be having Thanksgiving alone this year, anyone have a good bourbon pecan pie recipe ?

Posted by: Al Leppo at November 18, 2016 04:07 PM (vmsda)

74 We don't do that. Family get togethers are politics free. In the interest of familial perpetuation we do not talk politics.

Posted by: gNewt at November 18, 2016 04:07 PM (nkCeM)

75 But a happy dance followed by You Lost! would also work IMO

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 04:07 PM (GH68B)

76 53 Hey Horde - just occurred to me. SJW's always say that they will move to Canada if their candidate does not win. Why is it always Canada and never Mexico?
Posted by: Algore
-----------------

If all those gasbags followed through, Canada would tip over.

Posted by: Chi - #FreeCthulhu at November 18, 2016 04:07 PM (hqlWK)

77 Your treatise omitted, sadly, FARTING IN THEIR FACES.

Fixed.

Posted by: !Deplorable Lives Matter! at November 18, 2016 04:07 PM (oBuXO)

78 There won't be a single progtard grownchild at our table. Just me, my husband a few young men who have fought for their country, and the girlfriend of one.

*so happy*

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:07 PM (PY9jH)

79 If anybody says "I wanted to cry after I saw the
election results!" I'm going to push away from the table and declare
"Your tears and sorrow are meat and drink enough!" and start laughing,
ha HA! like the jolly trollop I am.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:01 PM (EnKk6)

--------------
LOL! "Jolly trollop" is delicious alliteration, btw. And everyone wants to bang a jolly trollop.

Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 04:07 PM (tHwdc)

80 Whatever happened to the old standby of dealing with family get-togethers by getting shitfaced? The classics exist for a reason!

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at November 18, 2016 04:08 PM (eebkl)

81 59 I have been having a hysterical time at the expense of my more liberal friends by making claims on the terrible things Trump will do. There is nothing, and I mean NOTHING they will not believe. I have successfully gotten away with:

Posted by: George Orwell's Ghost at November 18, 2016 04:05 PM (UgF8H)

=====================

4) On HuffPo, I read that Trump is planning on trading bombs to ISIS for access to oil fields.

5) On TPM, I read that Mitch McConnel is working on ways to prevent women from seeing doctors at all in his Obamacare replacement.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at November 18, 2016 04:08 PM (wkUSq)

82 I would disown family members who voted Hillary, and disinvite them to any gathering, especially Thanksgiving. Why argue with assholes when you can have a peaceful, beautiful Thanksgiving with fellow Trumpers?

Maybe it's easier for me since I have a small family who want to make their turkeys GREAT AGAIN, but I cannot stomach anyone who voted to commit national suicide and for a criminal who was IN YOUR FACE undermining national security all so she can enrichen herself and her cronies.

Posted by: John Nada - Formerly #NeverHillary at November 18, 2016 04:08 PM (KLyOA)

83 I would show up in a MAGA shirt, and if someone says something - ask them why they don't want Merica to be great. Then enjoy the festivities with the fireworks that you added.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:08 PM (gmeXX)

84 36 If you have to get up from the table, try this one :

"As the great Charlie Sheen once said, 'Now, if you will be so kind as to excuse me, I am going to go into the bathroom to shoot up.'"

--------

I love that one, hope I don't have to use it.

Posted by: Seems legit at November 18, 2016 04:08 PM (U+nHb)

85 Important question here, when do you drop "the rent is too damn high, right?"

I know this is close to the nuke option, but is it an offensive weapon or is it included in the final protective fires?

Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at November 18, 2016 04:09 PM (uWAzI)

86 My parents are coming down to DC and staying with me. Between them, sister, and me; not one of us voted for Clinton. Hell, the Clintons drove my Mom to the GOP. She was a Democrat until the 90s. Albeit she was a blue collar, working class variety of Democrat. Not the insane, globalist, immoral bunch they are today. Not sure she paid that much attention to politics until the Clintons came along. Even my nice gentle grandmother couldn't stand them.

Posted by: Puddleglum at November 18, 2016 04:09 PM (bD/KL)

87 I've found adding the idiotic "think about it" is the really funny part. I love watching progressives pretend to think. It's like watching a dog smell a fart.
Posted by: George Orwell's Ghost at November 18, 2016 04:05 PM (UgF8H)


I'm generally much more subtle. Go along with the "well, now that Trump is in..." comment, in the context of wherever it's coming, and I'll say something like "yeah, when he says he's going to shut down [fill in name of government department/program], I think he REALLY means it!!"

Then I shake my head. Maybe sigh, if I think the idiot is particularly gullible.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 18, 2016 04:09 PM (Pz4pT)

88
"By the year 2030, global warming predicts that the entire North American landmass will be flooded by seawater and wolves."

That's a seawolf!

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at November 18, 2016 04:09 PM (IqV8l)

89 re: EC
I support the compromise of 1787 or
I think we can all agree we need a constitutional convention

Posted by: tmitsss at November 18, 2016 04:09 PM (ZYgGF)

90 LOL! "Jolly trollop" is delicious alliteration, btw. And everyone wants to bang a jolly trollop.
Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 04:07 PM (tHwdc)
---
It's like a bouncy castle.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:09 PM (EnKk6)

91 Whatever happened to the old standby of dealing with family get-togethers by getting shitfaced? The classics exist for a reason!

-------------

Its served the Irish well for generations.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:09 PM (gmeXX)

92 Oh yeah. I forgot about last night:

"Trump is talking to that really radical crazy guy for secretary of state. What's his name...? Oh yeah. Mitt Romney. That guy is a nut."

Posted by: George Orwell's Ghost at November 18, 2016 04:09 PM (UgF8H)

93 74 We don't do that. Family get togethers are politics free. In the interest of familial perpetuation we do not talk politics.

Posted by: gNewt at November 18, 2016 04:07 PM (nkCeM)


Lucky you. We had that pact, but a dem would slip in a particularly nasty barb and say "woops, we don't discuss that" and the miserable pain in the ass peacekeepers would shut down retorts. As I am paying for the meal, I can invite who I like.

Posted by: Cn at November 18, 2016 04:09 PM (wczgi)

94 Great ideas, but since I'll be having Thanksgiving alone this year, anyone have a good bourbon pecan pie recipe ?
Posted by: Al Leppo at November 18, 2016 04:07 PM (vmsda)



1. buy pecan pie.
2. buy bourbon.
3. slice pie into eight pieces.
4. plate one piece for everyone in attendance.
5. pour 3 fingers into lowball glass for every person in attendande.
6. give every person in attendance one fork.
7. distribute.
8. eat.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:09 PM (cPsPa)

95 11 My sister voted for Hilary but I think she's the only one.

She's also more pro-life than I am. But Trump said pussy so......
Posted by: Nigel West Dickens at November 18, 2016 03:52 PM (FqgrG)

=================

My wife too. Ugh...

For her it's the environment. She 100% believes that climate change is going to kill the planet unless we "do something"!

Unless I gain a doctorate in climate studies, I'll never be qualified enough to rebuke the stuff she reads on HuffPo, apparently.

We don't talk politics much.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at November 18, 2016 04:09 PM (wkUSq)

96 65, The immediate effect seems to be a larger 401k balance.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:06 PM (gmeXX)
I did point that out to them, rather cheerfully. But they are on bat shit crazy mode, so nothing is getting through.

Posted by: IC at November 18, 2016 04:10 PM (a0IVu)

97
I'm going to a big affair and it's red forces/blue forces pretty evenly
down the line. Last year we managed to avoid politics but this is an
Extinction Level Event and I just know it will come up, first with some
passive aggressive remarks, then full volleys of recrimination.



I won't shoot first. I'm a guest.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:06 PM (EnKk6)


Please take notes (or better, video) and report back.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:10 PM (PY9jH)

98 Most of those fake quotes sound like the koran.

Posted by: Dave at Buffalo Roam at November 18, 2016 04:10 PM (YGqAy)

99 "Caedite eos. Novit enim Dominus qui sunt eius" - Mahatma Gandhi

Posted by: Kodos the Executioner at November 18, 2016 04:11 PM (BWL+E)

100 one way to make the whole tumpsteryia something of a win win is to ask your hillary relatives to come over and cry over any food you think needs salt.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:11 PM (cPsPa)

101 I'm going to try to avoid politics this Thanksgiving. Wife again. And I like Thanksgivingmanship much better than 'give me a fucking break', which is my usual go-to when someone tries to dig into me.

Posted by: Mark Andrew Edwards at November 18, 2016 04:11 PM (UHLlC)

102 1. buy pecan pie.

2. buy bourbon.

3. slice pie into eight pieces.

4. plate one piece for everyone in attendance.

5. pour 3 fingers into lowball glass for every person in attendande.

6. give every person in attendance one fork.

7. distribute.

8. eat.

Done

Posted by: Al Leppo at November 18, 2016 04:11 PM (vmsda)

103 THR thinks all cable news should go full anti Trump. Um, other than fox I'm pretty sure they're already there.

Posted by: Nigel West Dickens at November 18, 2016 04:11 PM (FqgrG)

104 I've never had to deal with lefties on Thanksgiving but this year might be different. I am going to my DIL's aunt and uncle's, along with assorted other relatives. I've only met them once and that was at the wedding.
I have no idea what their political affiliations are, but get this, they live in Portland.

Posted by: washrivergal at November 18, 2016 04:12 PM (CFc5L)

105

Tell 'em it was the ROBOTs!

But, I'm sure they already know.

TBH, it sounds like ... we won!

Automated Pro-Trump Bots Overwhelmed Pro-Clinton Messages, Researchers Say

The New York Times ( 11/17/16 ) John Markoff

Researchers from Oxford University in the U.K. found that an automated army of pro-Donald J. Trump chatbots overwhelmed similar programs supporting Hillary Clinton five to one in the last few days of the U.S. presidential campaign. The chatbots would send messages on Twitter based on a topic, usually defined on Twitter by a word preceded by a hashtag symbol. The chatbots were used to rant, confuse people on facts, or simply muddy discussions, according to Oxford researcher Philip N. Howard. "The use of automated accounts was deliberate and strategic throughout the election," according to the researchers. Although they were unable to directly link the chatbots to either campaign, there was evidence the activity was part of an organized effort. "By the third debate, Trump bots were launching into their activity early and we noticed that automated accounts were actually colonizing Clinton hashtags," Howard says. The researchers based their study on a collection of about 19.4 million Twitter posts gathered in the first nine days of November. The researchers selected tweets based on hashtags identifying certain subjects and identified automated posting by finding accounts that post at least 50 times a day. This strategy of using deceptive social media campaigns has been dubbed "computational propaganda."



Merci. You've made our Thanksgiving wonderful this year.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 18, 2016 04:12 PM (qCMvj)

106 Yeah, I can't wait to spend the day with my flaming lib brother and his knucklehead girlfriend in the SF Bay Area. She's a part-time music teacher at UC Berkeley. Or so she says. Need I say more?

Posted by: wth at November 18, 2016 04:13 PM (HgMAr)

107 I have no idea what their political affiliations are, but get this, they live in Portland.

Posted by: washrivergal at November 18, 2016 04:12 PM (CFc5L)


Hoo boy.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:13 PM (PY9jH)

108 The thing about political arguments is they don't bother me in the least, and in no way will I hate you if you disagree with me. But I think I'm in the minority on that. And the left absolutely cannot take that approach.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:13 PM (gmeXX)

109 I remembering bits from this article from last Thanksgiving. I'm beginning to laugh out loud again. The snark is so...jejune.

Posted by: Corona at November 18, 2016 04:13 PM (xVq5B)

110 Please take notes (or better, video) and report back.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:10 PM (PY9jH)
----
I'll drunk blog it.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:13 PM (EnKk6)

111 Apple and Ford coming home....Apparently they are adjusting to a Trump Presidency. LMAO

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 18, 2016 04:13 PM (dELE3)

112 LOVE it!!!!


Maybe throw in a few fake wise African proverbs, too?

Posted by: Lizzy at November 18, 2016 04:13 PM (NOIQH)

113 Hillary Clinton will never be President of the United States

Posted by: Grump928(c) at November 18, 2016 04:13 PM (QQ+il)

114 My brother and SIL are Dems but not Progs. Nice, polite folks who do not discuss politics at social gatherings. And everyone is bringing their dogs. It's gonna be great.

Posted by: katya the designated driver at November 18, 2016 04:13 PM (BHMfA)

115 Donald Trump said in 1999 that the key to winning the presidency was to tell the stupid republican voters that he would ban homosexuals from receiving blood transfusions, leading to them all dying off. This was effective propaganda, because 18% of republicans are closeted gay men. The saddest part is we all thought he was joking then. But lo, he was telling us what he really planned to do. Like Hitler in Mein Kampf.

Posted by: wooga at November 18, 2016 04:14 PM (RzTWy)

116 It is always useful to remind everyone how thre were indeed muslims at the first Thanksgiving but that is left out by the white males when they are telling the story.

it is mostly left out because the muslims the indians in cages and burned them alive for being heretics or savages or something.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:14 PM (cPsPa)

117

Those SJW's won't stop.

After Trump Victory, HuffPo Wants More 'No Guilt' Abortions in TV Shows
"No guilt. No shame. No over-the-top crying."


over at the truthrevolt.org

also, over there

Disney Shareholder Confronts CEO About Liberal Bias at ABC, ESPN

good

Things are trying to change, but resist they much.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 18, 2016 04:14 PM (qCMvj)

118 I shared the article with Atlanta friends last year, whose grown nieces are full-on Obamabot progtards.

They laughed their asses off and printed it to use as notes.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:14 PM (PY9jH)

119 THR thinks all cable news should go full anti Trump. Um, other than fox I'm pretty sure they're already there.

Posted by: Nigel West Dickens at November 18, 2016 04:11 PM (FqgrG)


It didn't work during the campaign, I can't see it working now.

Posted by: *Mikey NTH - The Outrage Outlet Salutes the Reign of the Golden Scalp Weasel! All Stock 20% Off! at November 18, 2016 04:14 PM (hLRSq)

120 108 The thing about political arguments is they don't bother me in the least, and in no way will I hate you if you disagree with me. But I think I'm in the minority on that. And the left absolutely cannot take that approach.
Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:13 PM (gmeXX)

==================

Most people don't know HOW to talk about politics. They also don't actually know that much about it. They have a very thin veneer of talking points that they rely on with a core of emotionalism.

It's why I rarely talk about politics in the real world.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at November 18, 2016 04:14 PM (wkUSq)

121 Sigh

Posted by: Nevergiveup at November 18, 2016 04:15 PM (dELE3)

122 Sorry, I don't know your sister, but if she voted for Hillory, she's not pro-life.



Period.

Posted by: BurtTC at November 18, 2016 04:05 PM (Pz4pT)



Hillory rhymes with pillory.

Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 04:15 PM (tHwdc)

123 Merci. You've made our Thanksgiving wonderful this year.

Posted by: artisanal 'ette at November 18, 2016 04:12 PM (qCMvj)

So Trump utilized Artificial Intelligence Social Media Bots, before the one who will never be president, you know the one, the frumpy, drunk baglady?

Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at November 18, 2016 04:15 PM (uWAzI)

124 Remember the Redskins are playing this Thanksgiving, so it might be a good time to say Redskins as much as possible.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:15 PM (gmeXX)

125 All I know is I have a mason jar full of apple pie moonshine and political discussions on Turkey Day make it go down faster to stop the words.

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at November 18, 2016 04:15 PM (eebkl)

126 As the great Mahatma Kobiashi Maru once observed:

"I like big butts I can not lie."

Posted by: eleven at November 18, 2016 04:16 PM (qUNWi)

127 I honestly find 'Derp' to be a perfectly adult answer to many of the absurd claims made by the left. I recommend it for its brevity and accuracy.

Posted by: Al Leppo at November 18, 2016 04:16 PM (vmsda)

128 Remember the Redskins are playing this Thanksgiving, so it might be a good time to say Redskins as much as possible.



We gonna play cowboys and indians up in heah!!

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 04:16 PM (o+pgY)

129 Remember, we need to make January 20, 2017 a national holiday. The end of an error.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:16 PM (PY9jH)

130 Thankfully, we are doing a super-small Thanksgiving this year, so I'll file away this for Christmas dinner, which will be yuuuge!

Posted by: Lizzy at November 18, 2016 04:17 PM (NOIQH)

131 I have to work this Thanksgiving and I'm damn glad of it. Double time and a half too.

This year, this is a very good thing.

Posted by: Biff at November 18, 2016 04:17 PM (WlGX+)

132


I've instructed the White House staff to prepare a Turkey and a Golden Retriever.

The Turkey will of course, be pardoned.

Posted by: Barack Hussein Obama at November 18, 2016 04:17 PM (pyZce)

133 Or you can insult by Spoonerism.

"You're probably on to something 'cause you're a fart smeller. I mean you're a smart feller."

Posted by: Dave at Buffalo Roam at November 18, 2016 04:17 PM (YGqAy)

134 I just love the last line of this post. Such a great slam. Almost as good as when i saw Alexthechick respond to somebody with "I hope your classes went as well as you argue here."

Posted by: Buzzion at November 18, 2016 04:17 PM (9fj7l)

135 "Never trust a fart over 50".

Posted by: rickb223

Age or driving?

Posted by: Bruce at November 18, 2016 04:17 PM (8ikIW)

136 108 The thing about political arguments is they don't bother me in the least, and in no way will I hate you if you disagree with me. But I think I'm in the minority on that. And the left absolutely cannot take that approach.
Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:13 PM (gmeXX)

==================

Most people don't know HOW to talk about politics. They also don't actually know that much about it. They have a very thin veneer of talking points that they rely on with a core of emotionalism.

It's why I rarely talk about politics in the real world.

------------

And most people just don't want to talk about it. I love it and don't mind it. Again, I'm in the minority. But it doesn't bother me in the slightest if you hold a different opinion.

Oh well, for the most part my family tends to agree with me, but there are times when I can be a little too libertarian for their taste.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:17 PM (gmeXX)

137 just me and Resident Evil for Thanksgiving, so this isn't a problem.

besides, everyone i know knows i'm A: thrilled with the election results and B: more than happy to gloat over any such leftard bullshit in public, so they know that bringing their shit into my home would be worse for them.

Posted by: redc1c4 at November 18, 2016 04:17 PM (serBz)

138 108 The thing about political arguments is they don't bother me in the least, and in no way will I hate you if you disagree with me. But I think I'm in the minority on that. And the left absolutely cannot take that approach.
Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:13 PM (gmeXX)




funny, before the left was weaponized having political arguments / spirited discussions used to be really fun. we used to argue politics at family gatherings all the time. everyone would go at it hammer and tongs and when it was over everyone would leave it on the floor and go have fun doing something else.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:17 PM (cPsPa)

139 Mrs. Guevara and I are so grateful our kids are not progressives, and so we don't need to employ this advice over Thanksgiving, but in my years at Berkeley I learned to deal with the type.

Making up quotes and statistics, as Ace suggests, is great fun. I attributed all sorts of stupid shit (that refuted the leftists' point) to Mao and Marx. Since nobody has ever read either Mao or Marx, no one can dispute you. You just need to quote them with utter certainty.

Another item of forensic ju-jitsu: Agree with the outrageous leftist statement, and then go further left. "Yeah, Rachel Maddow used to be OK, but xhe is moving too far to the right for me."

"Why do we even have universities? They're the mechanism for oppressing minorities, who aren't allowed to go. We should padlock all of them, and send the professoriate and the students into the fields to work. Pol Pot was right."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:17 PM (SRKgf)

140 I believe it was Gertrude Stein who said "Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering."

Posted by: Grump928(c) at November 18, 2016 04:18 PM (QQ+il)

141 I am also looking forward to dessert.

Reggie's traditional Blue Oyster Stuffing.

Posted by: Barack Hussein Obama at November 18, 2016 04:18 PM (pyZce)

142
"Caedite eos. Novit enim Dominus qui sunt eius" - Mahatma Gandhi
Posted by: Kodos the Executioner at November 18, 2016 04:11 PM (BWL+E)


Don't know what you said but I have thought about how Trump's campaign sort of reminded me of Gandhi's famous first they ignore you quote.

Posted by: Deplorable Male Logic at November 18, 2016 04:18 PM (lKyWE)

143 Simply agree w/ the TARDS. They'll never catch on.

Posted by: EZ Patronize at November 18, 2016 04:18 PM (FXW24)

144 Remember, we need to make January 20, 2017 a national holiday. The end of an error.


Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:16 PM (PY9jH)

Jane, you misspelled "terror" - the end of terror

Posted by: runner at November 18, 2016 04:18 PM (c6/9Q)

145 Listen, seriously, gloating is for chumps. Don't spoil all the fun.

Oh, and one more thing, if a progressive dares to challenge your ridiculous Trump claim, the appropriate finishing move is "What!? Are you saying you don't believe that Trump is capable of ANYTHING!?"

That always rocks them back. I actually had a guy apologize to me after I said that.

Posted by: George Orwell's Ghost at November 18, 2016 04:18 PM (UgF8H)

146 I plan on displaying the White Hispanic Pyramid as the table centerpiece.

Posted by: The Duke of Mish at November 18, 2016 04:18 PM (Tyii7)

147 To my leftist relatives, I would quote one of your fellow travellers, George Soros:

"so, just know that I'll be collecting all your stuff after Donald packs you off to the camps"

Posted by: Blue Hen at November 18, 2016 04:18 PM (326rv)

148 "Never trust a fart over 50".

Posted by: rickb223

Age or driving?
Posted by: Bruce




Yes.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 04:19 PM (o+pgY)

149 I'm having a smaller gathering than normal (so tired), but the meal will be yuge and luxurious.

We'll get the usual phone call mid-meal from the libs at their gathering in ATL saying how they "miss" us being with them, blah blah blah.

Since We Won this year, they may not be missing us so much.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:19 PM (PY9jH)

150 at our family Thanksgiving my mom likes to have the help dress as indians.



feather.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:19 PM (cPsPa)

151 134 I just love the last line of this post. Such a great slam. Almost as good as when i saw Alexthechick respond to somebody with "I hope your classes went as well as you argue here."
Posted by: Buzzion at November 18, 2016 04:17 PM (9fj7l)



How about mine, delivered to a snotty obnoxious know-it-all undergraduate: "You're going to make a fine adult."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:19 PM (SRKgf)

152 Maybe the best tactic would be to repeat their absurd claims back to them, only amplified. "I know, right?!? He's only reviving NASA's manned spaceflight program because he's going to build a prison on the dark side of the moon!

That's why he's talking to Newt!"

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:19 PM (EnKk6)

153

As they lust their complaints fears and paranoias

I will generously apply, "bless your hearts"

Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:19 PM (Bnpn+)

154 On the one hand, the Redskins are from DC, on the other hand, Christie loves the Cowboys. Kinda rooting for a tie.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:19 PM (gmeXX)

155 List not lust

Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:20 PM (Bnpn+)

156 Most people don't know HOW to talk about politics. They also don't actually know that much about it. They have a very thin veneer of talking points that they rely on with a core of emotionalism.

It's why I rarely talk about politics in the real world.


TJM -- so true.


Everyone I've ever heard try to make a political statement IRL has been not even wrong.

Posted by: eleven at November 18, 2016 04:20 PM (qUNWi)

157 Enduring Tgiving among FAR leftists and world class squishes the only sane thing to do is to complain about all the winning and say you will be glad when it is their turn again....

In like 50 years or so.........TRUMP SCOTUS WORLD BABY!!!

Posted by: !Deplorable Lives Matter! at November 18, 2016 04:20 PM (oBuXO)

158 you can totally troll your SJW relations, you know

Posted by: runner at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (c6/9Q)

159 Visiting my dad and stepmom for Thanksgiving, they are lefty loon hippies, bless them. I am pretty sure that my stepmom will throw me out of their house if she finds out that I voted for Trump. My dad takes her side in all things, if past history is any indication, so I am not expecting defense from him. Sad but that's how they are.

I'm debating whether to just be all screw it, I voted for him, so what, let the chips fall as may. Or if I just tell them I voted my conscience and keep repeating that till they stop asking me.

Christmas I'll be surrounded by conservatives that voted Trump or McMullin, things will be infinitely more civil.

Posted by: LizLem at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (hvf9s)

160 Important question here, when do you drop "the rent is too damn high, right?"

I know this is close to the nuke option, but is it an offensive weapon or is it included in the final protective fires?

Posted by: The Mouse that Roared


Probably during the immigration rant in a subtle dig at unintended economic consequences of open borders.

Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (Yg871)

161 Oh, and one more thing, if a progressive dares to challenge your ridiculous Trump claim, the appropriate finishing move is "What!? Are you saying you don't believe that Trump is capable of ANYTHING!?"

That always rocks them back. I actually had a guy apologize to me after I said that.

Posted by: George Orwell's Ghost at November 18, 2016 04:18 PM (UgF8H)
---
Stolen, like the New World from the Native Americans.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (EnKk6)

162 Then there are threats.

"If you don't shut up I'm going to start singing sea chanties."

Posted by: *Mikey NTH - The Outrage Outlet Salutes the Reign of the Golden Scalp Weasel! All Stock 20% Off! at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (hLRSq)

163

We need a cocktail for January 20

Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (Bnpn+)

164 140 I believe it was Gertrude Stein who said "Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering."
Posted by: Grump928(c) at November 18, 2016 04:18 PM (QQ+il)


Finish it up with "And suffering leads to fear," then change the subject while they figure out what the hell you're talking about.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (SRKgf)

165

I'm excited for Pullet and Gravy.

Posted by: Carlos Danger at November 18, 2016 04:22 PM (pyZce)

166 Okay, I didn't read the whole post. Too lazy.
Here's my strategy if any of my liberal niece by marriage, or liberal nephew comes:
1. "F**k you, you lost, Ha,ha,ha."
2."Oh, yeah? Well, I spit in your pumpkin pie."
3. Hook the big screen tv to my laptop and endlessly run the compilations of Hillary supporters cry, blubbering, and whining on election night.
4. "You voted for that lying, drunken bitch? They really shouldn't let the mentally retarded vote. "

Actually I won't do any of this. Fortunately, I come from a family of non-confronters.

Posted by: nerdygirl at November 18, 2016 04:22 PM (+lVUW)

167 I mentioned this yesterday - I got an email forward from a co-worker whose wife was quoted in some LA Times article for SJW / Liberal assclowns on HOW TO AVOID political talk at Thanksgiving this year.

MY MY MY how things have turned in a short year. Well, most of them will probably get what they deserve, which is a bag fat helping of "where is your goddess now, liberal pudwhack", a scoop of "how does my ass taste, little millenial" and a second serving of "we win, you lose, STFU".

But hopefully our kinder hearts and stronger minds will prevail and families can finally banish the divisive garbage talk at gatherings. I say, politics never belonged at the Thanksgiving table to begin with.

Posted by: Eli Cash at November 18, 2016 04:22 PM (a+WIL)

168 hey, speaking of mcmullin, did he call Trump to concede? Did johnson or stein call to concede? merely in an effort to seem like a legitimate candidate they should. should have called on election night before hillary.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:22 PM (cPsPa)

169 We need a cocktail for January 20




TAAIC - straight single malt scotch

(The Adults Are In Charge)

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 04:22 PM (o+pgY)

170 146. A fine tradition with deep roots in our native Peruvia.

Posted by: Your Decidedly Devious Uncle Palpatine, Still Accepting Harem Applicants at November 18, 2016 04:22 PM (1rrYf)

171 Trump University lawsuit settled for $25 million

Posted by: RWC - Team BOHICA at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (/D5Lf)

172
Might be a really good time to talk about the partys treatment of Sanders

Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (Bnpn+)

173 Here's one:

Trump will demand that power plants be converted back to coal to restore the coal mining jobs that Obama destroyed LIKE HE PROMISED.

Posted by: tu3031 at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (qJhUV)

174 simpler solution:
progtard says the usual mish mash of stupidity

you just laugh at them and talk about something else

problem solved.

Posted by: redc1c4 at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (serBz)

175 We need a cocktail for January 20

Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (Bnpn+)


A combination of Hillary's tears, Obama's yuge disappointment, and it must be bigly.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (PY9jH)

176 Also, always tell lefties that you heard something from Fox News.

"Well, according to Fox News, Trump is going to Make America Great Again."

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (gmeXX)

177 "If you don't shut up I'm going to start singing sea chanties."

It was on the good ship Venus
By Christ, you should've seen us
The figurehead was a whore in bed
And the mast was a mammoth penis

The captain of this lugger
He was a dirty bugger
He wasn't fit to shovel shit
From one place to another

Friggin' in the riggin'
Friggin' in the riggin'
Friggin' in the riggin'
There was f**k all else to do

Posted by: Biff at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (WlGX+)

178 159 Visiting my dad and stepmom for Thanksgiving, they are lefty loon hippies, bless them. I am pretty sure that my stepmom will throw me out of their house if she finds out that I voted for Trump. My dad takes her side in all things, if past history is any indication, so I am not expecting defense from him. Sad but that's how they are.

I'm debating whether to just be all screw it, I voted for him, so what, let the chips fall as may. Or if I just tell them I voted my conscience and keep repeating that till they stop asking me.

Christmas I'll be surrounded by conservatives that voted Trump or McMullin, things will be infinitely more civil.
Posted by: LizLem at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (hvf9s)


If the election gets mentioned at Christmas I dare you to call him McMuffin.

Posted by: Buzzion at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (9fj7l)

179 Don't know what you said but I have thought about how Trump's campaign sort of reminded me of Gandhi's famous first they ignore you quote.

Posted by: Deplorable Male Logic at November 18, 2016 04:18 PM (lKyWE)


Loosely translated: Kill them all and let God sort them out.

Posted by: Kodos the Executioner at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (BWL+E)

180 Re immigration, when you get the "what would have happened if the Indians had restricted immigration" horseshit, the obvious rejoinder "they'd still have their country, and not be stuck on reservations."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (SRKgf)

181 Here's a way to have fun with your lefty relatives just see where they end up checking out....

Announce loudly, "Can you guys believe he is talking about rounding up aliens in Nevada?"

And then continue in a more normal tone...

Yeah I heard on Huff Po he is going to use an old military base near Groom lake called like the Aria 51 or something.

Its gonna be all secret and like the codename? That's a sign of some bad stuff right?

And can we all agree this is a dangerous time?

I mean the aliens are already abducting people in the middle of the night and dissecting cows? And like now this? I think this could lead to like interstellar warfare man!

Like JFK said, we most be at peace with all of God's creations, on earth and in space. Right?

As Whitley Streiber observed, when we call someone else an alien, we only probe our own inner spaces. Right?

No war for dilithium!


Posted by: 18-1 at November 18, 2016 04:24 PM (X7E8f)

182 List not lust
Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:20 PM (Bnpn+)




for them it is the same.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:24 PM (cPsPa)

183 "Before we begin, may we all please have a moment of silence for all those whose lives have been shattered by the horrific events concerning the election. This is not the time to gloat, but express concern for people from every walk of life who through no fault of their own have been grieviously hurt.

And by that I mean Hillary's maid who lost her job cranking out classified data, the taxidermist doing Hillary's body work and the hooker corps of DC who won't be getting Bubba's trade."

Posted by: Blue Hen at November 18, 2016 04:24 PM (326rv)

184 This topic reminds me of Grantsmanship, which always trumps (damn that word!) good ideas!

Posted by: Academic Faculty at November 18, 2016 04:24 PM (jYnlS)

185 Fear is the Little Death.

Posted by: Gaertruud Von Schteinn at November 18, 2016 04:25 PM (QM5S2)

186 Re immigration
***
Also, Trump's so extreme he might even give us the same immigration policies of Mexico!

Posted by: 18-1 at November 18, 2016 04:25 PM (X7E8f)

187 Hell, the Clintons drove my Mom to the GOP. She was a Democrat until the 90s. Albeit she was a blue collar, working class variety of Democrat. Not the insane, globalist, immoral bunch they are today.
Posted by: Puddleglum at November 18, 2016 04:09 PM (bD/KL)


I call them JFK democrats: blue collar, god fearing, salt of the earth, voted happily for JFK in 60s. There is absolutely no place for them in the modern democratic party. Glad they voted en masse for Trump, willing to try a different tent.

Posted by: LizLem at November 18, 2016 04:25 PM (hvf9s)

188 Are there turkeys in Peruvia? I sure hope so.

Posted by: The Duke of Mish at November 18, 2016 04:25 PM (Tyii7)

189 We really should have a meet up on the National Mall Jan. 20.

And I guarantee you, the Mall will be left cleaner than when TFG was crowned emperor.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:25 PM (PY9jH)

190 163

We need a cocktail for January 20
Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (Bnpn+)

==================

It's called straight whiskey.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at November 18, 2016 04:25 PM (qPW+O)

191 I guess I'm the only one who decided to thin the herd. Usually we have a large crowd, this year I told people we're having just "a small gathering". I was very frank with the BIL who likes to call Trump voters "fucking fascists", that they needed to make their own arrangements until such time as they can gain self control (they are going elsewhere).
Upsides are many, including less noise and the ability to sit down and enjoy myself for a change

Posted by: Cn at November 18, 2016 04:26 PM (wczgi)

192 Probably during the immigration rant in a subtle dig at unintended economic consequences of open borders.


Posted by: weft cut-loop at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (Yg871)

That is a good application, I always use the "impossible to find budget friendly kale" tact during the open borders discussion. Then I veer sharply to the difficulty in vetting Mormons in counties not fully investigated in Utah and how we have to trust them after the great Utah Jazz rebuilding.

Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at November 18, 2016 04:26 PM (uWAzI)

193
Loosely translated: Kill them all and let God sort them out.
Posted by: Kodos the Executioner at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (BWL+E)


Funny I thought that was a USMC quote

Posted by: Deplorable Male Logic at November 18, 2016 04:26 PM (lKyWE)

194 We need a cocktail for January 20

The Scalpweasel

Bourbon and goldschlager, shaken...not stirred.

Posted by: Al Leppo at November 18, 2016 04:26 PM (vmsda)

195 https://tinyurl.com/glgk486


Pat Caddell CNN Smearing Trump Supporters They Just Call Everybody a Racist

Posted by: Evilpens at November 18, 2016 04:26 PM (y3aQB)

196 Loosely translated: Kill them all and let God sort them out.

Posted by: Kodos the Executioner at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (BWL+E)



I think that was Torquemada, wasn't it?

Another good ploy is to attribute a made-up quote to some nefarious but somewhat obscure historical figure.

"As the great champion of human rights Torquemada said ... "

Bonus points if you then ask the lib if xhe knows who Torquemada (or whoever) was, and he indignantly says, "Of course!" when it's obvious he doesn't.

"I think we have so much to learn about domestic political debate from Lavrenti Beria."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:26 PM (SRKgf)

197 He who can give offense without offense being taken, has already won.

Posted by: Sun Tzu at November 18, 2016 04:26 PM (QM5S2)

198 Might be a really good time to talk about the partys treatment of Sanders
Posted by: ThunderB

Sanders? Aren't they cleaning their tools after they finish their woodworking?

What?

Posted by: Bossy Conservative....deplorable American at November 18, 2016 04:26 PM (RFeQD)

199
White Russian

Bwhahahahhaaha

Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:27 PM (Bnpn+)

200
That reminds me....if there is a TV with chromecast setup you can easily, and secretly, play Trump's victory speech on the TV every time there is a lull in the conversation.

Posted by: 18-1 at November 18, 2016 04:27 PM (X7E8f)

201 We need a cocktail for January 20

The Scalpweasel

Bourbon and goldschlager, shaken...not stirred.


Posted by: Al Leppo at November 18, 2016 04:26 PM (vmsda)


I just threw up in my mouth a little.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:27 PM (PY9jH)

202 well, the worst things, and least talked about things, about Trump rounding up all the aliens is that he is going to destroy the economy of roswell.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:27 PM (cPsPa)

203 That is a good application, I always use the "impossible to find budget friendly kale" tact during the open borders discussion.


"We need free range immigrants!"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:27 PM (SRKgf)

204 If you are going to a liberal in-laws house, the first thing you should do is to ask if you can put on Fox News.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:28 PM (gmeXX)

205 How about a smile and then, "I know, you would think that, right?" as if what they said was ironic.

Posted by: Lizzy at November 18, 2016 04:29 PM (NOIQH)

206 I like the old fashion way......get super drunk and say stuff like. Yuuusss...yous......you know what your f@cking problem is??????? I'll f@cking tell you

Posted by: MrKnowItAll at November 18, 2016 04:29 PM (egzLR)

207 We need a cocktail for January 20
Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (Bnpn+)

==================

It's called straight whiskey.
....
WHY DO YOU HATE GAY PEOPLE!!!11!1!

Posted by: Overly compensating not gay lib at November 18, 2016 04:29 PM (1H9ox)

208 And by that I mean Hillary's maid who lost her job cranking out classified data, the taxidermist doing Hillary's body work and the hooker corps of DC who won't be getting Bubba's trade."
Posted by: Blue Hen



*sniff. That was beautiful.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 04:29 PM (o+pgY)

209 SJW: "Our country has too many cars!"

Moron: "I know, right? There soon will be more cars than people on the road. Scientists say that by 2030, every 3rd car you see on the highway will have no one inside."

Posted by: OregonMuse, deplorable since 2004 at November 18, 2016 04:29 PM (IvkyT)

210 "gee gang' will they pardon Hillary the same way that they did the turkey?"

Posted by: Blue Hen at November 18, 2016 04:29 PM (326rv)

211 If a grownchild begins to get mouthy, ask them if they want the upper or lower bunk in Trump's Happy Fun Camps.

Enjoy the hysterical response.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:29 PM (PY9jH)

212 I saw Torquemada open for Los Lobos back in '94.

Posted by: The Duke of Mish at November 18, 2016 04:30 PM (Tyii7)

213 Trump is going to issue dollar bills with Barack Obama's picture that are worth 3/5 of a dollar with a white guy on it.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 04:30 PM (g6yUI)

214 If you are going to a liberal in-laws house, the first thing you should do is to ask if you can put on Fox News.
Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:28 PM (gmeXX)




girl in our gym freaked out because some guy would not let her change the television station from fox to some liberal channel because fox is racist.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:30 PM (cPsPa)

215 I think it would be nice to say "we're not going to talk about PRESIDENT TRUMP and the fact that HILLARY WILL NEVER BE PRESIDENT".

And just repeat that if anyone brings up anything political. Including "please pass the sweet potatoes".

Just so that everyone knows how kind and caring you are.

Posted by: Mama AJ at November 18, 2016 04:30 PM (gTQoY)

216 I find it is more like this:

SJW: "Our country has too many cars!"

Moron: "I know, right? Say that is a nice new beamer you have. "

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:30 PM (gmeXX)

217 Is grownchild a word? If it's not, it should be.

Posted by: Grump928(c) at November 18, 2016 04:30 PM (QQ+il)

218 There had better be video of Eris drinking from the skulls of her enemies.

I mean, the extra special Thanksgiving ones, not the normal daily ones.

Though the Horde has been good (for certain values of good) and totally deserve that video as well.

Posted by: alexthechick - so so itchy at November 18, 2016 04:30 PM (mf5HN)

219 She's also more pro-life than I am. But Trump said pussy so......

Can one truly be pro-life and anti-pussy?

Posted by: Duncanthrax at November 18, 2016 04:30 PM (DMUuz)

220 210 "gee gang' will they pardon Hillary the same way that they did the turkey?"
Posted by: Blue Hen at November 18, 2016 04:29 PM (326rv)



Ship her off to Virginia Tech to be a lab rat? One can only hope.

Posted by: buzzion at November 18, 2016 04:30 PM (z/Ubi)

221 https://tinyurl.com/zvv2qmp



Vince Neil to Perform at Trump Inauguration

"You're invited but your Friend can't Come"

Posted by: Evilpens at November 18, 2016 04:31 PM (y3aQB)

222 Gee, this massive infrastructure of Trump's sure is horrible. Roads and bridges, and putting American workers back to work. All those union guys getting great gigs. This f**king fascist, who the hell does he think he is.

That's what I'd say to the lib fam if I was going to T'giving. Which I'm not.

Posted by: Biff at November 18, 2016 04:31 PM (WlGX+)

223 Trump is forcing obama's mother in law out of her government housing.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:31 PM (cPsPa)

224 >>> If the election gets mentioned at Christmas I dare you to call him McMuffin.
Posted by: Buzzion at November 18, 2016 04:23 PM (9fj7l)

Done and done.

Posted by: LizLem at November 18, 2016 04:31 PM (hvf9s)

225 White Russian

Bwhahahahhaaha



Thunder B wins the thred.

Posted by: eleven at November 18, 2016 04:31 PM (qUNWi)

226 Watching OLIVER! So many cute boys!

Posted by: Harry Reid at November 18, 2016 04:31 PM (FXW24)

227 Vince Neil to Perform at Trump Inauguration

Girls! Girls! Girls!

Posted by: Biff at November 18, 2016 04:31 PM (WlGX+)

228 >>I saw Torquemada open for Los Lobos back in '94.

I saw 18 Rabbit open for Torquemada at the Wildwood Casino.

Posted by: Lizzy at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (NOIQH)

229 For your entertainment, here's the instructions for people to protest Trump's EPA appointment, complete with the worst protest chants of all time.

https://twitter.com/kerpen/status/799709175882215424

For those who don't want to copy/paste the link, I'll reproduce the chants here:

1) "We the people are here to say / no deniers at EPA"
2) "Stop the Ebell / Power to the People"
3) "When you deny / people die"
4) "When the EPA is under attack / What do we do / Stand up fight back"
5) "Who's water? Our water. Who's air? Our air. Who's planet? Our planet."

Posted by: Ian S. at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (3J/LN)

230 Here's an idea: Find sage-but-not-really quotes from The Art of the Deal and attribute *those* to lefties. Ones about overcoming strife, etc. etc.

Then, drop the hammer. Bigly.

Posted by: Sporkatus at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (eXSOZ)

231 So we're liking the movie over Turkey this year?

Mom's already ruled banning political talk from her table. Her bird = her rules.

Although the bluest is probably my BIL who just threw his 1st heart attack 2 weeks ago so we probably shouldn't gang up on him.

Posted by: DaveA at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (8J/Te)

232 Remind them that Hillary Clinton is the first woman to lose a presidential election.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (gmeXX)

233 Trump is forcing obama's mother in law out of her government housing.


I know right. Effin Imminent Domain.

Posted by: Grump928(c) at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (QQ+il)

234 I also like the insult delivered offhand, in passing, e.g., "Yeah, the boat was pitching so much I was lurching like Hillary Clinton."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (SRKgf)

235 "As Gaertruude Schteinn observed, 'The man who is slowest to arm himself is quickest to savor the bounties of Heaven.'"

Can't. Stop. Laughing.

Posted by: rickl the deplorable at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (zoehZ)

236 190
163



We need a cocktail for January 20

Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:21 PM (Bnpn+)



==================



It's called straight whiskey.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison

We'll be enjoying Canadian whisky in the Faculty Lounge.

Posted by: Academic Faculty at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (jYnlS)

237 RE: Indians & immigration

The Indians tried to resist immigration-- violently & with intermittent success.

"The Indians" are a perfect example of what happens if you CAN'T resist immigration: cultural dilution & cultural extinction.

The New Emerging Democratc Majority wants white Americans to hurry up & die off.

Posted by: mnw at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (oaepv)

238 Pat Caddell CNN Smearing Trump Supporters They Just Call Everybody a Racist
Posted by: Evilpens

It's like Dr Pepper drinkers.

Wouldn't you like to be a Pepper too?

Pat Caddell is a hoot, too. So blunt, so direct. He's pretty fearless.

Posted by: Bossy Conservative....deplorable American at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (RFeQD)

239 That reminds me....if there is a TV with chromecast setup you can easily, and secretly, play Trump's victory speech on the TV every time there is a lull in the conversation.
Posted by: 18-1 at November 18, 2016 04:27 PM (X7E8f)



That's deliciously evil.

I'm viciously bitter I didn't think of it.

Posted by: alexthechick - so so itchy at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (mf5HN)

240 Makes me wonder how the Clinton's are going enjoy Thanksgiving. Together or not at the Chelsea apt./medical center and research facility. Bill was in Chappaqua the other day. Maybe they'll all gather there then so their separate ways.

Posted by: washrivergal at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (CFc5L)

241 If you are going to a liberal in-laws house, the first thing you should do is to ask if you can put on Fox News.
Posted by: SH

Better yet: Ask them if "that fox news" will be on. When they say no, reply "Good! I can't stand that lying leftist propaganda outfit"!

if they're stupid enough to ask what you do watch, act as though you've just realized that you don't watch the same programs, and say, "never mind.......comrade."

Posted by: Blue Hen at November 18, 2016 04:33 PM (326rv)

242 Vince Neil got in trouble with the law earlier this year when he was charged with misdemeanor battery after allegedly assaulting a woman in Las Vegas


Outrage. Cued.

Posted by: Biff at November 18, 2016 04:33 PM (WlGX+)

243 176 Also, always tell lefties that you heard something from Fox News. "Well, according to Fox News, Trump is going to Make America Great Again."
Posted by: SH
____________

Here's where it could be great fun to state that that is the reason you voted for Trump--because he promised to make America great again.

Then before anyone can get a word in edgewise, you lie that you voted for Obama in 2008 because you were for hope and change. "I remember thinking back then, 'How could anyone but the most cynical, hate-filled people be against hope OR change?'"

Posted by: Furious George at November 18, 2016 04:33 PM (77i7V)

244 I just went over to DailyKos, to get a feel for what I could expect over the Thanksgiving dinner table convo, and whew! What a viper pit!

Every single Trump nominee so far is demonstrably racist, islamophobic, homophobic, and- especially in the case of Trump himself- criminal sexual assaulters and business frauds.

There is no one good or decent thing to be said-- they are in full-blown hate meltdowns over there.

Take a gander, it's unbelievable.

Posted by: MTF at November 18, 2016 04:33 PM (sCBEO)

245 Remind them that Hillary Clinton is the first woman to lose a presidential election.
_______________

And Trump was the first to win with a female campaign manager.

Posted by: Nigel West Dickens at November 18, 2016 04:33 PM (FqgrG)

246 My husband and I are going out to a lovely restaurant for Thanksgiving because I have banned my libtard children from any holiday celebration until they apologize for calling us racists for voting for Trump. I don't care if they eat peanut butter out of the jar for dinner.

Posted by: smoabb99 at November 18, 2016 04:33 PM (HBU7W)

247 There isn't much concern about libs showing at one of the Thanksgivings I go to. On that side of the family we play black jack and try to take everyone's money, drink copious amounts of cheap beer (a few of them are finally not judging me for bringing my own stock), and usually watch some iteration of a "Tank Builders" marathon or The Outlaw Josey Wails.
On the wife's side...well, it's...different. But I drink more.

Posted by: ajmojo at November 18, 2016 04:33 PM (1H9ox)

248 5) "Who's water? Our water. Who's air? Our air. Who's planet? Our planet."

I just want to note that the bad apostrophes are in the original. The professional science droppers can't write English.

Posted by: Ian S. at November 18, 2016 04:33 PM (3J/LN)

249 >>The Scalpweasel

Dessert should be creme brulee, not browned on top, just very lightly blonded.

Serving blondies and not brownies might get you arrested for a hate crime, so don't go there.

Posted by: Mama AJ at November 18, 2016 04:34 PM (gTQoY)

250 CNN Headline (breathlessly)

TRUMP'S RIGHT TURN

President-Elect Taps Hardliners

To be fair, they did the same to Obama. Right?

Posted by: ed gibbon at November 18, 2016 04:34 PM (LQhMs)

251 Mr Trump, being the marketing genius he is, could help the many SJW--afflicted among us who must go to amongst overwhelming numbers of imbeciles.....DJT could just gen up a MAGA smartphone 30 second clip of his dick-punching babies and grabbing the womyns netherlands....exploding SJW heads....

BEAUTY. PEACE.

Posted by: !Deplorable Lives Matter! at November 18, 2016 04:34 PM (oBuXO)

252 Hey, you know that guy who paints pictures of our presidents in various heroic scenes, like Teddy blasting Squatches, or JFK on a robotic unicorn on the moon?

He has one of Trump:

http://sharpwriter.deviantart.com/

Would that I were a history teacher so I could hang these in the classroom.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:34 PM (EnKk6)

253 Take a gander, it's unbelievable.

Posted by: MTF at November 18, 2016 04:33 PM (sCBEO)

And that BS is why, I have thinned the Thanksgiving herd. I will not tolerate being insulted by those at my table

Posted by: Cn at November 18, 2016 04:34 PM (wczgi)

254 "Lo" doesn't get used often enough as a preamble to the expression of a deep thought in modern conversation anymore.

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at November 18, 2016 04:34 PM (8ZskC)

255 >>I just want to note that the bad apostrophes are in the original. The professional science droppers can't write English.


LOL!


Amazing they couldn't come up with any chants that included 'poop in hallway' or Gold King Mine....

Posted by: Lizzy at November 18, 2016 04:34 PM (NOIQH)

256 o heck, I thought i'd start right out of the gate with laughing delightedly when someone mentions anything at all political,
"well I sure am glad IRS is now a legally politically useful tool'

just to set the mood, yaknow

Posted by: willow at November 18, 2016 04:34 PM (R7cwD)

257 230 Here's an idea: Find sage-but-not-really quotes from The Art of the Deal and attribute *those* to lefties. Ones about overcoming strife, etc. etc.


Or look up real quotes from liberal icons, and attribute them to Trump.

I once did that online to a leftist, to whom I attributed several JFK quotes to Rush Limbaugh. The leftist snorted that that was typical of the crazy right-wing nut, and then I told him who had REALLY said that, and included links.

His response: "You tricked me!"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:34 PM (SRKgf)

258 Always let them know that Hillary Clinton broke that glass ceiling. She was the very first FBI investigated candidate, preparing the way for all future felons to run.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:35 PM (gmeXX)

259 Scratch your head and ask "I forgot what Hillary's biggest accomplishment was could you remind me?"

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 04:35 PM (GH68B)

260 Although the bluest is probably my BIL who just threw his 1st heart attack 2 weeks ago so we probably shouldn't gang up on him.
Posted by: DaveA at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (8J/Te)



How much money does he have and are you in the will?

I mean, um, no, no, you shouldn't gang up on him. That would be, what's that word, it's the one people keep saying to me but all I hear is Charlie Brown's teacher when they say it. Wrong! That's it. Wrong.

So don't do that.

Posted by: alexthechick - so so itchy at November 18, 2016 04:35 PM (mf5HN)

261 246 My husband and I are going out to a lovely restaurant for Thanksgiving because I have banned my libtard children from any holiday celebration until they apologize for calling us racists for voting for Trump. I don't care if they eat peanut butter out of the jar for dinner.

Posted by: smoabb99 at November 18, 2016 04:33 PM (HBU7W)
Good for you!

Posted by: Cn at November 18, 2016 04:35 PM (wczgi)

262 Two words:
SAMOAN
BATHTOWEL

Posted by: Banana Splits Guy at November 18, 2016 04:35 PM (eebkl)

263 209 SJW: "Our country has too many cars!"

Moron: "I know, right? There soon will be more cars than people on the road. Scientists say that by 2030, every 3rd car you see on the highway will have no one inside."
Posted by: OregonMuse, deplorable since 2004 at November 18, 2016 04:29 PM (IvkyT)

+++

LOL!

Posted by: washrivergal at November 18, 2016 04:35 PM (CFc5L)

264 246 My husband and I are going out to a lovely restaurant for Thanksgiving because I have banned my libtard children from any holiday celebration until they apologize for calling us racists for voting for Trump. I don't care if they eat peanut butter out of the jar for dinner.
Posted by: smoabb99 at November 18, 2016 04:33 PM (HBU7W)
---
Good for you.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:35 PM (EnKk6)

265 248 5) "Who's water? Our water. Who's air? Our air. Who's planet? Our planet."
I just want to note that the bad apostrophes are in the original. The professional science droppers can't write English.
Posted by: Ian S. at November 18, 2016 04:33 PM (3J/LN)



Who's retard? We are!

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:36 PM (SRKgf)

266 Another nice thing to do is to leave your SUV running all through dinner and let your liberal in-laws know you want the car to be warm when you get back in.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:36 PM (gmeXX)

267 I find it is more like this:

SJW: "Our country has too many cars!"

Moron: "I know, right? Say that is a nice new beamer you have. "


Had. HAD.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 04:36 PM (o+pgY)

268 Look, all you need to do to shut down your annoying progressive relatives is, after whatever they say, look them in the eye and say:

"Maybe so, but Hillary Clinton will never be president."

Then laugh like you're a clown with a meat cleaver.

Posted by: OregonMuse, deplorable since 2004 at November 18, 2016 04:36 PM (IvkyT)

269 Mikey NTH, I am completely stealing "Stop libsplaining, that's triggering."

Thank you!

Posted by: barbarausa at November 18, 2016 04:36 PM (Elk67)

270 199
White Russian

Bwhahahahhaaha
Posted by: ThunderB
------------------

Ha!
And even better, call it a caucasian like "the Dude" does.

Actually, that is a cold weather favorite of mine, so there's a good chance that I'll be enjoying one or seven on the 20th.

Posted by: Chi - #FreeCthulhu at November 18, 2016 04:36 PM (YuR0h)

271 I just went over to DailyKos...Take a gander, it's unbelievable.

I'd rather masturbate with a cheese grater.

Posted by: The Duke of Mish at November 18, 2016 04:36 PM (Tyii7)

272 Is grownchild a word? If it's not, it should be.
Posted by: Grump928(c)


brats or ingrates have no ages associated with them, officiously speaking ...

Posted by: Adriane the Verbosity Critic ... at November 18, 2016 04:37 PM (AoK0a)

273 >>5) "Who's water? Our water. Who's air? Our air. Who's planet? Our planet."

They left out "Who's phone?"

Posted by: Mama AJ at November 18, 2016 04:37 PM (gTQoY)

274 I'm really looking forward to the side eye Mooch is going to give Melania at the inauguration.

You know she'll be angry-jealous.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:37 PM (PY9jH)

275 I had a fun conversation with a lefty acquaintance on the Trump as Hitler meme.

The guy was talking about how his dumb, unemployed machinist cousin from flyover land was the most vocal Trumpkin he knew, and of course he supports Trump because he is too dumb to understand his betters...just like those Rubes in Germany....and America would be better off if we could get rid of those kind of people....

I pointed out that in the 30s the people arguing we needed to eliminate all the dumb unemployed yokels were the national socialists and their allies...

Posted by: 18-1 at November 18, 2016 04:37 PM (X7E8f)

276 Marcus Aurelius? The rapper?

Posted by: Richard McEnroe at November 18, 2016 04:37 PM (Kucy5)

277 Although the bluest is probably my BIL who just threw his 1st heart attack 2 weeks ago so we probably shouldn't gang up on him.
Posted by: DaveA at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (8J/Te)


How much money does he have and are you in the will?

I mean, um, no, no, you shouldn't gang up on him. That would be, what's that word, it's the one people keep saying to me but all I hear is Charlie Brown's teacher when they say it. Wrong! That's it. Wrong.

So don't do that.

------------

Well even I have my limits, I wouldn't bring up preexisting conditions and Obamacare again. But I might say, hey Make American Hearts Beat Again - you know just to lighten the mood.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:37 PM (gmeXX)

278 Say meaningless quips like the Sphinx in the movie Mystery Men:

We are number one! All others are number two, or lower.

When you care what is outside, what is inside cares for you.

He who questions training only trains himself at asking questions.

When you doubt your powers, you give power to your doubts.

Posted by: HuuskerDu at November 18, 2016 04:38 PM (gYAkw)

279 I will stick with the question,
"What are you hiding from

Posted by: 80's music fan at November 18, 2016 04:38 PM (PHcLa)

280 That reminds me....if there is a TV with chromecast setup you can easily, and secretly, play Trump's victory speech on the TV every time there is a lull in the conversation.
Posted by: 18-1 at November 18, 2016 04:27 PM (X7E8f)



Here's the clip to play on the TV: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7j-TWKFuIq0

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:38 PM (SRKgf)

281
Look, all you need to do to shut down your annoying progressive
relatives is, after whatever they say, look them in the eye and say:

"Maybe so, but Hillary Clinton will never be president."

Then laugh like you're a clown with a meat cleaver.

Posted by: OregonMuse, deplorable since 2004 at November 18, 2016 04:36 PM (IvkyT)


That's both hilarious and terrifying.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:38 PM (PY9jH)

282 Senator Chris Murphy is concerned about Flynn and Sessions. Too bad, you lost bitch.

Posted by: Nigel West Dickens at November 18, 2016 04:38 PM (FqgrG)

283 Posted by: Biff at November 18, 2016 04:31 PM (WlGX+)

That is Motley Crue & Nikki Sixx is not a Fan of Trump, I ripped him a new one on twitter & replied with a Fuck You !, I replied with "Good Argument Junkie"

Posted by: Evilpens at November 18, 2016 04:38 PM (y3aQB)

284 ... we have to trust them after the great Utah Jazz rebuilding.
Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at November 18, 2016 04:26 PM


Has this been scheduled yet?

Posted by: Duncanthrax at November 18, 2016 04:38 PM (DMUuz)

285 250 CNN Headline (breathlessly)

TRUMP'S RIGHT TURN

President-Elect Taps Hardliners

To be fair, they did the same to Obama. Right?
Posted by: ed gibbon at November 18, 2016 04:34 PM (LQhMs)

Yes. Just like I offered a 12 step program for Romney voters in 2012.

Posted by: Nickolas "Sperm Burper" Kristof at November 18, 2016 04:39 PM (48QDY)

286 Just for fun:

When the first useful idiot tese off about the "unfairness of it all" heartily agree.....and launch into a tirade about how poor Bernie the bolshievik was cheated during the dem primary. And how we all have to unite to ensure that it never happens again.

Posted by: Blue Hen at November 18, 2016 04:39 PM (326rv)

287 42 It's always good to throw in some Star Trek quotes too.Usually from Spock but you can get by with Picard and Data as well,
Posted by: steevy at November 18, 2016 04:01 PM (r/0kC)

If your lib relatives say something completely divorced from reality, shout "There are FOUR lights!"

Posted by: No One of Consequence at November 18, 2016 04:39 PM (BXC+l)

288 Posted by: Nigel West Dickens at November 18, 2016 04:38 PM (FqgrG)

Treump channelizing Choom Boy "Chris Get over it, I won"

Posted by: Evilpens at November 18, 2016 04:39 PM (y3aQB)

289 The hate level pegging at nine kind of bewilders me. I would say "Trump was a Democrat most of his life, so why do they hate him so much?" but that would just invite hours of harangue so, fuck it! More pie.

Posted by: MTF at November 18, 2016 04:39 PM (sCBEO)

290 Or look up real quotes from liberal icons, and attribute them to Trump.

I once did that online to a leftist, to whom I attributed several JFK quotes to Rush Limbaugh. The leftist snorted that that was typical of the crazy right-wing nut, and then I told him who had REALLY said that, and included links.

His response: "You tricked me!"
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:34 PM (SRKgf)



My favorite variant of that was someone posted a couple of paragraphs from a book and said omg look what Sarah Palin wrote!

After all the Lefties had their fun, the original poster said yeah, that's the opening of Dreams From My Father.

Hilarity ensued.

Posted by: alexthechick - so so itchy at November 18, 2016 04:39 PM (mf5HN)

291 Did you know that 9 in 5 women are sexually assaulted on college campuses each year ? Really gets your noggin' joggin', doesn't it?

Posted by: The Deplorable Mr. Trumpkin at November 18, 2016 04:40 PM (wwd4n)

292 Democrat Underground is STILL limping along.

Someone did yeoman's work dicking with their site.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:40 PM (SRKgf)

293 207 WHY DO YOU HATE GAY PEOPLE!!!11!1!
Posted by: Overly compensating not gay lib at November 18, 2016 04:29 PM (1H9ox)

=====================

Because whiskey is great.

Boom.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at November 18, 2016 04:40 PM (qPW+O)

294 266
Another nice thing to do is to leave your SUV running all through dinner
and let your liberal in-laws know you want the car to be warm when you
get back in.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:36 PM (gmeXX)

Can't believe we forgot a CAFE standards comment.Trump's CAFE standards have forced me out of getting a nice hybrid and I have to settle for a 4X4.


Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at November 18, 2016 04:40 PM (uWAzI)

295 When you walk in and they tell you politics will not be discussed, here's a good way to respond. Let them know that you have completely tuned it out since the last debate because Trump had no chance. And thank them for not rubbing it in that Hillary won. Then let the fireworks begin.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:40 PM (gmeXX)

296 yeah Trump's appointments are horrifying, nothing like valerie jarett, van jones.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:40 PM (cPsPa)

297 This is a post for the ages.

Couldn't do it though-I'd laugh right in the middle of the delivery.

Posted by: WinLinBSDAdmin at November 18, 2016 04:40 PM (B11vO)

298 Oxford Don Stephen Potter introduced the world to the principles of Gamesmanship the way to win at games by resort to cheap ploys which were very close to cheating without being technically cheating.


NO ONE is better at cheap passive aggressive ploys than Oxford dons. No one. Trust me on this.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:41 PM (SRKgf)

299 you can always try reminding those SJWs and progressives that FDR for a while had a lot of admiration for Mussolini, who did, after all, make the trains run on time.

Posted by: Mallfly suPreme at November 18, 2016 04:41 PM (2JQBv)

300 It really twists your noodle to realize that woman are more likely to be raped at Harvard than in Harlem.

Posted by: Grump928(c) at November 18, 2016 04:41 PM (QQ+il)

301 236
We'll be enjoying Canadian whisky in the Faculty Lounge.
Posted by: Academic Faculty at November 18, 2016 04:32 PM (jYnlS)

=================

I get the joke, but I do have a soft spot for a good rye.

Posted by: TheJamesMadison at November 18, 2016 04:41 PM (qPW+O)

302 who is water?
who is air?
who is earth?
who is party?

Posted by: redc1c4 at November 18, 2016 04:42 PM (serBz)

303 296 yeah Trump's appointments are horrifying, nothing like valerie jarett, van jones.
Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:40 PM (cPsPa)



That would be a good one: "I heard Trump just appointed Van Jone to head the National Security Council."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:42 PM (SRKgf)

304 My favorite variant of that was someone posted a couple of paragraphs from a book and said omg look what Sarah Palin wrote!



After all the Lefties had their fun, the original poster said yeah, that's the opening of Dreams From My Father.



Hilarity ensued.

Posted by: alexthechick - so so itchy at November 18, 2016 04:39 PM (mf5HN)


BOOM

Someone should read Choom Boy's poem about apes and crunchy figs at the table and ask everyone if they know who wrote it.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:42 PM (PY9jH)

305 296 yeah Trump's appointments are horrifying, nothing like valerie jarett, van jones.
Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 04:40 PM (cPsPa)

++++

I'm telling you what.

Posted by: washrivergal at November 18, 2016 04:42 PM (CFc5L)

306

"Maybe so, but Hillary Clinton will never be president."

Then laugh like you're a clown with a meat cleaver.


Hey wait a minute! That's not funny!

Posted by: Amy Schumer at November 18, 2016 04:42 PM (RFeQD)

307 When I was a kid the family gathering on thanksgiving was always a good time, we lived in Nebraska and our other family members were from Kansas and Oklahoma. That was when the game between Nebraska and Oklahoma was the biggest thing happening on thanksgiving day, me and sis and the cousins from OK got along better than expected. We always had one thing in common, that truest of true statements that bound US together. Kansas sucks.

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at November 18, 2016 04:42 PM (6Ll1u)

308 "Any policy that smacks of a return to colonialism must be firmly opposed but I think the time is right for an inward-looking non-interventionist nationalism that is exclusively dialectical in nature."

*rubs chin thoughtfully*

Posted by: Cicero (@cicero) at November 18, 2016 04:42 PM (8ZskC)

309 We're in Chicago, so I'm hoping the Cubs' World Series win will keep everyone too happy and excited to talk about politics.

I have no gift for the cut and thrust of debate (or what passes for debate among libs) so if anyone gets nasty I will probably just get up and go home.

Posted by: Annalucia at November 18, 2016 04:43 PM (a5bF3)

310 FDR for a while had a lot of admiration for Mussolini

And he damned near dry humped Uncle Joe Stalin at every opportunity.

Posted by: The Duke of Mish at November 18, 2016 04:43 PM (Tyii7)

311 One can always set up a safe space room with toys and art supplies with which they can draw and express their concerns.

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 04:43 PM (GH68B)

312 "Maybe so, but Hillary Clinton will never be president."

Then laugh like you're a clown with a meat cleaver.

Posted by: OregonMuse, deplorable since 2004 at November 18, 2016 04:36 PM (IvkyT)

Oh bliss, bliss and heaven... I knew such lovely pictures

Posted by: ed gibbon at November 18, 2016 04:44 PM (LQhMs)

313 I have no gift for the cut and thrust of debate (or what passes for debate among libs) so if anyone gets nasty I will probably just get up and go home.


Best cut & thrust?

"Fuck you. We won. "

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 04:44 PM (o+pgY)

314 Or look up real quotes from liberal icons, and attribute them to Trump.
....
So, about half of Bill and Hillary's public statements during the 90's?

Posted by: ajmojo at November 18, 2016 04:44 PM (1H9ox)

315 I might be up for pizza, anyone want in?

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 04:44 PM (GH68B)

316 Or look up real quotes from liberal icons, and attribute them to Trump.
Both approaches have their own awesomely evil uses. Lefty quotes to righties, undermine what they think they know and make them paranoid, and righty quotes to lefties, get the "call coming from inside the house" terror going on when you're all "Yes, from art of the deal! I have the book! BOO!"

Posted by: Sporkatus at November 18, 2016 04:44 PM (eXSOZ)

317 The hate level pegging at nine kind of bewilders me. I would say "Trump was a Democrat most of his life, so why do they hate him so much?" but that would just invite hours of harangue so, fuck it! More pie.
Posted by: MTF

I'm living this one. When people ask why I voted for the guy, I say, "it was hard. Most of his life, he's been a democrat and a typical NE liberal.....like you assholes. The e-mail server of shithouse.com did it for me."

Posted by: Blue Hen at November 18, 2016 04:45 PM (326rv)

318 Razorfist outdoes himself here.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Usb2FEfzfRM

He typically talks about games and metal. \m/

Posted by: BourbonChicken at November 18, 2016 04:45 PM (VdICR)

319 won't vote left? racisit
won't vote for a left criminal that sells our interests to foreign countries?
won't vote for a a woman that sent one of her buddies to Benghazi, and when a deal that she made went sour left him and others to die, that's a friend of her, so we can assume how much OUR lives actually mean to her.
afterwards she blamed a obscure video guy of the terror killing spree done by those innocent youth so she wouldn't be blamed for making bad deals to bad guys.
won't vote for a woman who attacks women her husband abused .
won't vote for a woman that tell others laughingly but with extra truth she has a public policy and a private reality she grlsplains.
won't vote for a woman that thinks the middle class isn't of value .
won't vote for a woman that rationalizes a maid having access to classified information because ..

Posted by: willow at November 18, 2016 04:46 PM (R7cwD)

320 straight whiskey.

Canadian whisky


What is Canadian whiskey, really? Apologetically slightly-gay whiskey?

Posted by: Sporkatus at November 18, 2016 04:46 PM (eXSOZ)

321 42 It's always good to throw in some Star Trek quotes too.Usually from Spock but you can get by with Picard and Data as well,
Posted by: steevy at November 18, 2016 04:01 PM (r/0kC)
---
"After a time you may find that having is not so pleasing a thing after all as wanting. It is not logical, but it is often true."

Then take their pie.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:46 PM (EnKk6)

322 I'm certainly looking forward to having a First Lady who hasn't flunked a bar exam.

Posted by: Furious George at November 18, 2016 04:46 PM (77i7V)

323 Or look up real quotes from liberal icons, and attribute them to Trump.

Posted by: ajmojo at November 18, 2016 04:44 PM

I would suggest Chairman Mao's Little Red Book

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 04:46 PM (GH68B)

324 Trump will institute White Studies departments at all federally-funded universities.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 04:47 PM (g6yUI)

325 I want to coin a new term that fits these whiners better. Snowflake Envious Tantrum Throwers or SETTers is one possibility.

Posted by: PaleRider, follow link to help SMFH now Joy at November 18, 2016 04:47 PM (dkExz)

326 We always had one thing in common, that truest of true statements that bound US together. Kansas sucks.



If it wasn't for Kansas, when Texas secedes, we could annex straight to Canada.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 04:47 PM (o+pgY)

327

We could reference outrageous quotes and say they were Trumps, only they are BLM or Rachel Dolezel or DeRay or some other racist prog

Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:48 PM (Bnpn+)

328
Moron: "I know, right? There soon will be more cars than people on the road. Scientists say that by 2030, every 3rd car you see on the highway will have no one inside."
Posted by: OregonMuse, deplorable since 2004 at November 18, 2016 04:29 PM (IvkyT)


Way ahead of you, buddy.

Posted by: Google at November 18, 2016 04:48 PM (VdICR)

329 "You only voted against Trump because he's white!"

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 04:49 PM (g6yUI)

330 Posted by: HuuskerDu at November 18, 2016 04:38 PM (gYAkw)
"When you can balance a tack hammer on your head, you can head off your foes with a balanced attack."
"Well, why am I wearing watermelons on my feet?"
"...I don't recall asking you to do that!"

Posted by: Sporkatus at November 18, 2016 04:49 PM (eXSOZ)

331 We need a cocktail for January 20
............

The Clinton Kamikaze
vodka
Robitussin
elephant tranquilizer
propofol
fentanyl

Posted by: wth at November 18, 2016 04:49 PM (HgMAr)

332 A letter I just sent:

To the management of Fox 26,

You people in the news media aren't fooling anyone; except possibly yourselves. The fact that you are nothing but cheerleaders for the Democratic party and various anti-American leftist political positions was made clear to everyone with an IQ greater than that of the average cabbage - during the recent election. Your credibility is zero - nor will it be restored. Accurate polls indicate that in excess of 90% of people believe nothing of what you have to say.

The firing of reporter Scarlett Fakhar; ostensibly for having "political bias" is laughable. All of your reporters are biased; they are simply biased in the same direction as the management is biased; which evidently makes them "totes OK". If leftist politics were as wonderful as you all say it is, you would welcome dissenting voices and contrary opinions as providing tests that allowed you to prove your positions as the best. But the fact is the entire leftist ideology is so fragile and weak that it collapses at even the slightest counter argument. Socialism is such a good idea it must be made mandatory and competing viewpoints must be silenced; how pathetic.

Michael Moore correctly described the election of Donald Trump as the largest "F*ck you" delivered to the established power structure in the history of the world, and I would like to second that sentiment by addressing it directly to the management of Fox 26.

Not only will I be removing 26.1 from the list of stations received by my television; I shall be making a complaint of political bias to the FCC shortly after Mr. Trump takes office. Your license to broadcast requires you to operate in the public interest and you are failing to do so.

Sincerely,
etc.



Posted by: Polling man at November 18, 2016 04:49 PM (w0oFI)

333 Ask them what they are going to do with their savings under the Trump tax plan?

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:49 PM (gmeXX)

334 FDR for a while had a lot of admiration for Mussolini
And he damned near dry humped Uncle Joe Stalin at every opportunity.


It was the mustache.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 18, 2016 04:50 PM (YEelc)

335

Ok. AtC beat me to it. False Quotes are the way to go

Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:50 PM (Bnpn+)

336 325
I want to coin a new term that fits these whiners better. Snowflake Envious Tantrum Throwers or SETTers is one possibility.

Posted by: PaleRider, follow link to help SMFH now Joy at November 18, 2016 04:47 PM (dkExz)

Reality change deniers? Voters Against Self Interest (VASI) or Racist Voters Against Self Interest (RAVASI)

Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at November 18, 2016 04:50 PM (uWAzI)

337 Trump will mandate huge coal fires to release enough carbon to cancel winter, so that old people don't have to freeze or pay huge heating bills.

And if you don't agree, you hate old people.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 04:50 PM (g6yUI)

338 I know, right. Finally there'll be a First Lady who won't be setting impossible standards of beauty, fashion, grace and radiance.
Impossible for everybody else, I tell you.

Posted by: Northernlurker at November 18, 2016 04:50 PM (hJrjt)

339 SH I kept having an ad pop for days stating Obama had given 42 billion back to us (tax wise)
I checked my pockets and nope. did anyone get that?

Posted by: willow at November 18, 2016 04:51 PM (R7cwD)

340 Someone should read Choom Boy's poem about apes and crunchy figs at the table and ask everyone if they know who wrote it.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:42 PM (PY9jH)



No, no, attribute it to Trump or Romney or some other GOP figure, then let them dump on it for its stupidity.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:51 PM (SRKgf)

341 I am all for just airing out your grievances in the open. My opening line is "Shut up and eat before I rip your arms off and beat you with them."

Posted by: Picric at November 18, 2016 04:51 PM (Tilb4)

342 Crap, sock off.

Posted by: An Observation at November 18, 2016 04:52 PM (w0oFI)

343 Americans will have to be apologizing for unsustainable prosperity.

Posted by: Northernlurker at November 18, 2016 04:52 PM (hJrjt)

344 my BIL who just threw his 1st heart attack 2 weeks

They zipped him right into an OR and gave him a stent. Back to work 2 days later.

How do you know you're not having a heart attack.
Goto the ER and say chest pain.
Wait a few minutes.
If they quit zipping around you testing things you're not having a heart attack.

Things I learnt

Posted by: DaveA at November 18, 2016 04:52 PM (8J/Te)

345 SH I kept having an ad pop for days stating Obama had given 42 billion back to us (tax wise)
I checked my pockets and nope. did anyone get that?

----------

I'm still looking for the $2,500 in savings on my health insurance.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:52 PM (gmeXX)

346 Ok. AtC beat me to it. False Quotes are the way to go
Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:50 PM (Bnpn+)



False but plausible. Plausibility is the key.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:52 PM (SRKgf)

347 311
One can always set up a safe space room with toys and art supplies with which they can draw and express their concerns.

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts

You've been in the Faculty Lounge?!?

Posted by: Academic Faculty at November 18, 2016 04:52 PM (jYnlS)

348 Her brother is a YUGE and completely irrational Hillary supporter and may be wearing a black armband when he joins us from New Orleans.
Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 03:54 PM (tHwdc)


Because she's expected to die of alcohol over-dose?

Posted by: nerdygirl at November 18, 2016 04:52 PM (+lVUW)

349 322 I'm certainly looking forward to having a First Lady who hasn't flunked a bar exam.
Posted by: Furious George at November 18, 2016 04:46 PM (77i7V)



I'm looking forward to one who can't scare dogs off the back of a meat truck.

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:53 PM (SRKgf)

350 SH yeah me too!, or Free Health Care!
or free obamaphone, ebt card, free housing electricity , but I really wanted a newish car.

Posted by: willow at November 18, 2016 04:53 PM (R7cwD)

351 SH I kept having an ad pop for days stating Obama had given 42 billion back to us (tax wise)
I checked my pockets and nope. did anyone get that?


Yep!

Posted by: Iran at November 18, 2016 04:54 PM (g6yUI)

352 Trump Inaugural entertainment idea:

Twisted Sister. A no-brainer. Dee Snider gave his blessing to Trump using "We're Not Gonna Take It" in the primaries. He said he was gratified that Trump had the courtesy to call him & ask permission.

OTOH, Dee voted for Zero, & he's a "pro-choice Christian," so I don't know if he'd be interested in being featured at Mr. Orange festivities.

Of course, there's money (whole lotta money) to be made, & Viagra for a drooping nostalgia act....

Posted by: mnw at November 18, 2016 04:55 PM (oaepv)

353 Watching Thunderbirds Are Go 1966 on ThisTV, And I don't know why.

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 04:55 PM (GH68B)

354 #118 I shared the article with Atlanta friends last year, whose grown nieces are full-on Obamabot progtards.

They laughed their asses off and printed it to use as notes.


Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:14 PM (PY9jH)

--------I was thinking something like the Groucho Marx show, where you rig up a line over the Thanksgiving table with a Word Bird to deliver talking points.

Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 04:55 PM (tHwdc)

355 Her brother is a YUGE and completely irrational Hillary supporter and may be wearing a black armband when he joins us from New Orleans.
Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks

Tips:

1.Wear one like a headband
2. let it slip that you have her down for April 17th in the dead pool
3. Keep mentioning how her share of the black vote was much lower than obama, thus making you question her as possibly being racist.

Posted by: Blue Hen at November 18, 2016 04:55 PM (326rv)

356 "Trump just announced he's going to raise taxes!"

"Yay!"


"And give the proceeds to Africa!"

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:56 PM (SRKgf)

357 I think it was Pope Francis who quipped " I believe it was the irrational fear of decapitation that led to the high walls of the Vatican".

Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at November 18, 2016 04:56 PM (uWAzI)

358 Watching Thunderbirds Are Go 1966 on ThisTV, And I don't know why.

To enjoy the craftsmanship.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 04:56 PM (g6yUI)

359 252 Hey, you know that guy who paints pictures of our presidents in various heroic scenes, like Teddy blasting Squatches, or JFK on a robotic unicorn on the moon?

He has one of Trump:

http://sharpwriter.deviantart.com/

Would that I were a history teacher so I could hang these in the classroom.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:34 PM (EnKk6)


Wow. I believe the tank treads are made of gold ingots.

Posted by: rickl the deplorable at November 18, 2016 04:56 PM (zoehZ)

360 Tips:

1.Wear one like a headband
2. let it slip that you have her down for April 17th in the dead pool
3. Keep mentioning how her share of the black vote was much lower than obama, thus making you question her as possibly being racist.


4. Tell him you were going to vote for her, but then you realized you had to have a vagina to do that.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:57 PM (gmeXX)

361 From WZ:

A fashion designer whose styles have been sported by Michelle Obama is boycotting dressing Melania Trump, saying she encourages "my fellow designers to do the same" when it comes to outfitting the next first lady.

"As one who celebrates and strives for diversity, individual freedom and respect for all lifestyles, I will not participate in dressing or associating in any way with the next First Lady," Sophie Theallet wrote in a letter this week.

1) It would be OK with me if she appeared without benefit of clothing.

2) Being banned from Beautyrest Fashions doesn't seem o onerous to me.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, This Is the Dawning of the Age of the Trumpius! at November 18, 2016 04:57 PM (Nwg0u)

362 my BIL who just threw his 1st heart attack 2 weeks

They zipped him right into an OR and gave him a stent. Back to work 2 days later.




My uncle has had so many that he gets a do it yourself stent kit from CVS.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 04:57 PM (o+pgY)

363 342 Crap, sock off.

Posted by: An Observation at November 18, 2016 04:52 PM (w0oFI)

Great letter. I was gonna say, didn't sound like Polling Man. At all.

Posted by: washrivergal at November 18, 2016 04:58 PM (CFc5L)

364 "After a time you may find that having is not so pleasing a thing after all as wanting. It is not logical, but it is often true."

Then take their pie.
Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 04:46 PM (EnKk6)
----------------

A girl after my own heart.

Posted by: bluebell at November 18, 2016 05:00 PM (uHcnA)

365 I might be up for pizza, anyone want in?
Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 04:44

What kind you having?

Posted by: John Podesta at November 18, 2016 05:00 PM (3hlFs)

366 Somehow, I have a feeling that this Thanksgiving, table conversation at our large family dinner will stay far, far afield of politics.

On Election Day, the family texting group came alive at about 3 PM with "We just voted--now you go vote too!!" and the various responses from every quarter. Most of my wife's side of the family are tribal Democrats, so then came all the texts about how "exciting" it was to think of how "historic" this election would be. Everything very polite, because they knew Wifey and I were included and would return any slight a hundredfold, but still annoying.

At that point I turned off notifications for that group, but as things started to go decidedly Trumpward, I checked back in and saw that the group had gone completely silent at about the time Florida was called. Heh heh heh.

So I doubt that any of them will bring the subject up next Thursday. But I probably will!

Posted by: Otis Criblecoblis at November 18, 2016 05:01 PM (0MKRD)

367 On Prager yesterday he had a story from NY that a female muzzy state official was asking for volunteers to escort people who were afraid of being assalted or abused by Trump supporters on their way to work or school. Dennis was asking conservatives to sign up to do the escorting showing they have no fears. I thought if you can do that especially if you are one of the lucky who has a arms carry license.

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 05:01 PM (GH68B)

368 Posted by: Polling man at November 18, 2016 04:49 PM (w0oFI)

Well done!

Posted by: Tammy al-Thor at November 18, 2016 05:01 PM (afWd1)

369 The Neutral or Nonsensical Statement Disguised as Agreement.

-
A variation on this that I like is apparent agreement followed by insult. For example,

Moonbat: Hillary Clinton won the popular vote.

Me: Yes, she's a loser.

Moonbat: I fear for the immigrants' safety.

Me: Yes, they're stupid alright.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, This Is the Dawning of the Age of the Trumpius! at November 18, 2016 05:01 PM (Nwg0u)

370 how could you vote for Trump?

well. my wife convinced me that the 1st female POTUS should be a woman of integrity, accomplishment and honor, not a dishonest drunken criminal of a national security risk...

(true story: i actually used that on a local Hilbot... so much smoke came out of their ears it set off a fire alarm)

;D

Posted by: redc1c4 at November 18, 2016 05:01 PM (serBz)

371 I got an email from my daughter's school district supervisor today about 'how we embrace students and families of all backgrounds'.
Posted by: IC at November 18, 2016 03:59 PM (a0IVu)


He/she thinks your name is Harry Reid?

Posted by: nerdygirl at November 18, 2016 05:01 PM (+lVUW)

372 On Prager yesterday he had a story from NY that a female muzzy state official was asking for volunteers to escort people who were afraid of being assalted or abused by Trump supporters on their way to work or school.

Dennis was asking conservatives to sign up to do the escorting showing they have no fears.



Fuck them.


Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 05:02 PM (o+pgY)

373 A fashion designer whose styles have been sported by Michelle Obama is
boycotting dressing Melania Trump, saying she encourages "my fellow
designers to do the same" when it comes to outfitting the next first
lady.


Ivanka Trump has her own line of clothing, so that seems like where Melania would probably get her stuff anyways.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 18, 2016 05:02 PM (YEelc)

374 I like to compare segments of our economy to made up european countries.
"I am a firm believer in the Eastern Blowmestan school of health care. The fact that they charge white males a 200% surcharge for all services rendered has had a stunning effect on the rate of leprosy for them."

Posted by: ajmojo at November 18, 2016 05:02 PM (1H9ox)

375 I do like pepperoni

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 05:02 PM (GH68B)

376 Did the guys who did Thunderbirds also do the Fireball XL-5 stuff?

Posted by: Tinfoilbaby at November 18, 2016 05:03 PM (6Ll1u)

377 how could you vote for Trump?

well. my wife convinced me that the 1st female POTUS should be a woman of integrity, accomplishment and honor, not a dishonest drunken criminal of a national security risk...

(true story: i actually used that on a local Hilbot... so much smoke came out of their ears it set off a fire alarm)




Golf clap.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 05:03 PM (o+pgY)

378 Thanks to all for the good wishes and prayers for my daughter and her friend with regard to their little accident (a couple threads ago). Everything got taken care of and they are about to be picked up by her friend's dad from the towing place. Best of all, no one is hurt (the car needs some work though).

Some of you kind morons even reached out with offers of help, both on the blog and off, and you are just wonderful people. Bless you, JEM, especially, for offering to get the car; unfortunately, we are about 3000 miles out of your way. The others know who they are and have my thanks too.

You guys and gals are the best.

Posted by: bluebell at November 18, 2016 05:03 PM (uHcnA)

379 how could you vote for Trump?


"It was easy. You just take the Sharpie and fill in the little bubble next to his name. Nothing to it."

Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 05:03 PM (SRKgf)

380

You can settle your differences much easier with a kind word and a gun than you can with just a kind word. - Al Capone

Posted by: Klide Grouchman at November 18, 2016 05:04 PM (cQ2Cj)

381 A fashion designer whose styles have been sported by Michelle Obama is
boycotting dressing Melania Trump, saying she encourages "my fellow
designers to do the same" when it comes to outfitting the next first
lady.
...
I don't think Melania is into championship wrestling belts.

Posted by: ajmojo at November 18, 2016 05:04 PM (1H9ox)

382 >>>"This is why Trump won."

Posted by: *Mikey NTH - The Outrage Outlet Salutes the Reign of the Golden Scalp Weasel! All Stock 20% Off! at November 18, 2016 04:02 PM (hLRSq)

And "Hillary Clinton will never be president."

Posted by: m at November 18, 2016 05:04 PM (/4GEs)

383 Did the guys who did Thunderbirds also do the Fireball XL-5 stuff?


Yes.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 05:04 PM (g6yUI)

384 My place will be in friendly territory: We're all White Nationalists here. I kind of miss the old days. I had a sister in law from CT, who was too clever by half. My dad was an old school Reaganite, and just sort of assumed she was too. He would say whatever the hell he wanted, while my little brother and I tried to keep a straight face, while she just sat there and fumed. She would occasionally elbow my older brother, hoping he would try to score a point for her/their side. (She had him p-whipped, still does: he changed political and religious affiliation to suit her. Another reason to hate attorneys.) Man, there was some cringe-funny shit flying in those days.

Posted by: Brave Sir Robin at November 18, 2016 05:05 PM (SeD0w)

385 346 Ok. AtC beat me to it. False Quotes are the way to go
Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 04:50 PM (Bnpn+)


False but plausible. Plausibility is the key.
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 04:52 PM (SRKgf)



Well that eliminates everything Obama has said.

Posted by: buzzion at November 18, 2016 05:05 PM (z/Ubi)

386 where Melania would probably get her stuff anyways.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 18, 2016 05:02 PM (YEelc)

Well, the Venn diagram of the clothes made for lard-asses like Michelle Obama and models like Melania Trump looks suspiciously like two perfect circles.....

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at November 18, 2016 05:05 PM (42Mgr)

387 Tammy al-Thor at November 18, 2016 05:01 PM (afWd1)




belated happy birthday to you. I was getting warmed up to go off on scorpios before wishing you the same yesterday but was called away.

nice you will be able to buy alcohol now without having Thor go along with you.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 05:05 PM (cPsPa)

388
Did the guys who did Thunderbirds also do the Fireball XL-5 stuff?
Posted by: Tinfoilbaby


And Supercar!

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at November 18, 2016 05:05 PM (IqV8l)

389 374
I like to compare segments of our economy to made up european countries.

"I am a firm believer in the Eastern Blowmestan school of health
care. The fact that they charge white males a 200% surcharge for all
services rendered has had a stunning effect on the rate of leprosy for
them."

Posted by: ajmojo at November 18, 2016 05:02 PM (1H9ox)

You know since Obamacare, I have the luxury of looking for day labor on my terms.

Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at November 18, 2016 05:06 PM (uWAzI)

390
Did the guys who did Thunderbirds also do the Fireball XL-5 stuff?
Posted by: Tinfoilbaby

And Supercar!


And UFO, and Space:1999.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 05:07 PM (g6yUI)

391 And UFO,and Space 1999.

Posted by: steevy at November 18, 2016 05:07 PM (r/0kC)

392 Well, the Venn diagram of the clothes made for lard-asses like Michelle Obama and models like Melania Trump looks suspiciously like two perfect circles.....
Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at November 18, 2016 05:05 PM (42Mgr)




michelle has a strong preference for clothing with labels or logo patterns. melania has good taste.




probably tastes good too.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 05:07 PM (cPsPa)

393 Wiki says Thunderbirds are a Britsh project and were amazed it did so poorly they made a second one Thunderbird 6

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 05:07 PM (GH68B)

394 I don't think Melania is into championship wrestling belts.

Yeah, and if she loses Hillary's fashionistas, over-sized Mao jackets and oven mitts will be off the table too. It's going to be so nice to have a proper first lady again.

Posted by: Brave Sir Robin at November 18, 2016 05:07 PM (SeD0w)

395 Trump Inaugural entertainment idea:

-
I have no idea what his politics are (although I think he's from NY) but the Brian Setzer Big Fun Swing Band would be a hoot.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, This Is the Dawning of the Age of the Trumpius! at November 18, 2016 05:08 PM (Nwg0u)

396 Trump should have Slayer play at his inauguration.

Posted by: steevy at November 18, 2016 05:09 PM (r/0kC)

397 guessing there are not going to be any comments about how Melania's inaugural gowns showed off her strong child bearing arms, partly because she has better fashion sense than to wear a sequined tank top to the inaugural and partly because she does not have lunch lady arms.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 05:10 PM (cPsPa)

398 For the 'rons:

http://people.com/style/michelle-obama-third-vogue-cover-december-2016/

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 05:10 PM (EnKk6)

399 At that point I turned off notifications for that group, but as things started to go decidedly Trumpward, I checked back in and saw that the group had gone completely silent at about the time Florida was called. Heh heh heh.


------------

Before you head over there, send a reply to all on the group text, that says "Wow, I think Trump may pull this out."

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 05:10 PM (gmeXX)

400 >>> A fashion designer whose styles have been sported by Michelle Obama is boycotting dressing Melania Trump, saying she encourages "my fellow designers to do the same" when it comes to outfitting the next first lady.

Good. Let all the raging intolerant lib designers out themselves. It will be sweet when they come crawling back like dogs to kiss the gold plated Trump ring.

Posted by: LizLem at November 18, 2016 05:12 PM (hvf9s)

401 If Ted Nugent didn't play a inauguration ball I would be disappointed

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 05:12 PM (GH68B)

402 379 how could you vote for Trump?


"It was easy. You just take the Sharpie and fill in the little bubble next to his name. Nothing to it."
Posted by: Deplorable Jay Guevara at November 18, 2016 05:03 PM (SRKgf)



"I don't have a vagina to vote with."

or if you are a woman "Well I tried voting with my vagina but I couldn't see if I was making the right selection from that position." "I tried voting with my vagina but everyone at the polling location was giving me funny looks when I started to hike up my skirt."

Posted by: buzzion at November 18, 2016 05:12 PM (z/Ubi)

403 As the great Socrates once said, wait I drank what?

Posted by: Duke Lowell at November 18, 2016 05:13 PM (kTF2Z)

404 20 This year's conversation at our office party would be centered around 'there is no way Trump can close down the EPA' - that conversation has started already so I'm going to have to come up with something pithy to say.

Posted by: IC at November 18, 2016 03:55 PM (a0IVu)

Agree with them.

'Oh he'll never be able to close it, but hes changing its focus dramatically,

EPA will now stand for the Environmental Pussy Agency. They will be closely examining the affect of pussy on Climate Change"

Posted by: Cannibal Bob, 'Hobo, the other white meat' at November 18, 2016 05:13 PM (uz/Pv)

405 I do like pepperoni
Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 05:02 PM

Besta Pizza has some great ones, IYKWIM.

Posted by: John Podesta at November 18, 2016 05:13 PM (3hlFs)

406 I don't think anyone's going to pull this shit at Thanksgiving, thank God. I have a NeverTrumper in the family but I don't think they'll be there this year.

Posted by: Insomniac - 1 in 94,609,000 at November 18, 2016 05:13 PM (0mRoj)

407 Good. Let all the raging intolerant lib designers out themselves. It will be sweet when they come crawling back like dogs to kiss the gold plated Trump ring.

Posted by: LizLem at November 18, 2016 05:12 PM (hvf9s)
---
Maybe some new up-and-coming designers can get the gig instead.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 05:13 PM (EnKk6)

408 Amateurs and community organizers golf on the taxpayers' dime; pros have their own fucking country clubs.

Posted by: Fritz at November 18, 2016 05:13 PM (6uMKl)

409 320 What is Canadian whiskey, really?
==========================

It's JV bourbon

Posted by: His Imperial Majesty, TFG at November 18, 2016 05:14 PM (sCBEO)

410 Fashion designers hate gorgeous women because no one is paying attention to their clothes.

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 05:14 PM (GH68B)

411 398 For the 'rons:

http://people.com/style/michelle-obama-third-vogue-cover-december-2016/
Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 05:10 PM (EnKk6)

No. Just no.

Posted by: Insomniac - 1 in 94,609,000 at November 18, 2016 05:14 PM (0mRoj)

412 If you don't give me all the pumpkin pie, trump wins. Think about it.

Posted by: George Orwell's Ghost at November 18, 2016 05:14 PM (UgF8H)

413 OT - but for those of you so inclined to venture over to NRO, there is a nice blurb on the corner doing a comparison of the two justices thought to be the top 2 for the Court - Pryor and Sykes. I didn't know much about either, but each look good.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 05:14 PM (gmeXX)

414 "you will instead claim to agree with them, while in fact contradicting them, subverting them, of baffling them with statements that nearly, but do not quite, make sense."

When the hell did you start following me around? I have more fun doing this, in person and on facebutt.

Posted by: Meremortal, Bigly Matters at November 18, 2016 05:14 PM (qxDn6)

415 In the immortal words of George Custer, where'd all those fuckin Indians come from?

Posted by: Duke Lowell at November 18, 2016 05:15 PM (kTF2Z)

416 I'll be machining some custom "Uncle's Holiday Knuckles" for the serious Adult Thanksgiving moments
Always remember to gently test your knuckles for fit before busting a fucking skull with them...

Posted by: Beto Ochoa (@Beto_In_Austin) at November 18, 2016 05:15 PM (hCdMd)

417 For the 'rons:

http://people.com/style/michelle-obama-third-vogue-cover-december-2016/


Wow, talk about misandry.

Posted by: Blanco Basura at November 18, 2016 05:17 PM (YEelc)

418 412 If you don't give me all the pumpkin pie, trump wins. Think about it.
Posted by: George Orwell's Ghost at November 18, 2016 05:14 PM (UgF8H)


===

There's an idea: Let's all serve "Trumpkin Pie"

Posted by: washrivergal at November 18, 2016 05:17 PM (CFc5L)

419 Wow kellyanne Conway is on the 5.

That woman is a razor. If she was the woman running against Trump trump would have been beaten like a redheaded stepchild.

Posted by: Pep at November 18, 2016 05:17 PM (LAe3v)

420 I expect Hills to die by inhaling her own vomit. The sound track will be Cry, Baby by Janis Joplin.

Posted by: Northernlurker at November 18, 2016 05:18 PM (hJrjt)

421 I think we should just take a verbal cue from our betters:

"I won"

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at November 18, 2016 05:18 PM (7ZVPa)

422 so does anyone else get the sense that megyn is really selling her book hard? she is this far from offering autographed blows with every purchase.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 05:18 PM (cPsPa)

423 What is Canadian whiskey, really? Apologetically slightly-gay whiskey?
Posted by: Sporkatus at November 18, 2016 04:46 PM (eXSOZ)



Well Canadian whiskey has its own song.

https://youtu.be/tT4d1LQy4es

Posted by: buzzion at November 18, 2016 05:18 PM (z/Ubi)

424 according to Wiki (i know) the EPA was created by an EO signed by Nixon...

ergo, another EO could eliminate it completely.

Posted by: redc1c4 at November 18, 2016 05:18 PM (serBz)

425 And she used Criterion instead of criteria correctly.
I think I'm in love.

Posted by: Pep at November 18, 2016 05:18 PM (LAe3v)

426
I tried voting with my vagina but it can't grip a pencil

Posted by: Sandra Fluke at November 18, 2016 05:19 PM (lKyWE)

427 415 In the immortal words of George Custer, where'd all those fuckin Indians come *thwang!*....... frooooo? *face plant*

Posted by: Duke Lowell at November 18, 2016 05:15 PM (kTF2Z)

Posted by: Cannibal Bob, 'Hobo, the other white meat' at November 18, 2016 05:19 PM (uz/Pv)

428 What is Canadian whiskey, really?
It's a blend. I *think* it might have rye in it.

Posted by: Brave Sir Robin at November 18, 2016 05:19 PM (SeD0w)

429 I hate to admit it, but the new first lady does not look capable of beating her husband to death with one of his own limbs.
Point definitely goes to Michelle.

Posted by: Northernlurker at November 18, 2016 05:19 PM (hJrjt)

430 I think it was Gertrude Stein who once said: ...

Posted by: KentAllard at November 18, 2016 05:19 PM (TQw9b)

431 You know Steve Bannon produced Seinfeld right? Remember the Soup Nazi who wouldn't serve Seinfeld because he was a Jew, well, there were no people of color in that store either. It was an apocalyptic view of our future.

Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at November 18, 2016 05:20 PM (uWAzI)

432 A lib acquaintance was just pontificating on facebutt about Nixon resigning in disgrace and I commented:

"Yes, this is true. Nixon resigned when given notice that impeachment articles would be presented. The tipping point was discussions by Nixon of using the IRS to harass people on an "enemies list" Nixon had written up. At that time, the idea of even discussing such an action was considered a potential horrible abuse of power."

The obvious is left unsaid, but the implication should be obvious.

Posted by: Meremortal, Bigly Matters at November 18, 2016 05:20 PM (qxDn6)

433 I hate to admit it, but the new first lady does not look capable of beating her husband to death with one of his own limbs.
Point definitely goes to Michelle.
Posted by: Northernlurker at November 18, 2016 05:19 PM (hJrjt)



no one is getting pegged in the new administration.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 05:20 PM (cPsPa)

434 I tried voting with my vagina but it can't grip a pencil
Posted by: Sandra Fluke



You couldn't grip a telephone pole.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 05:21 PM (o+pgY)

435 And Supercar!

Posted by: Bertram Cabot, Jr. at November 18, 2016 05:05 PM (IqV8l)


Starring Troy Tempest!

Posted by: OregonMuse, deplorable since 2004 at November 18, 2016 05:21 PM (IvkyT)

436 So Donna Brazille that paragon of virtue is demanding that Sessions not be allowed to be AJ.... Racism or something...

Posted by: deplorable donna at November 18, 2016 05:22 PM (O2RFr)

437 433 I hate to admit it, but the new first lady does not look capable of beating her husband to death with one of his own limbs.
Point definitely goes to Michelle.
Posted by: Northernlurker at November 18, 2016 05:19 PM (hJrjt)



no one is getting pegged in the new administration.
Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 05:20 PM (cPsPa)



So Jeb has definitely been ruled out of any cabinet position then.

Posted by: buzzion at November 18, 2016 05:22 PM (z/Ubi)

438 You couldn't grip a telephone pole.

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 05:21 PM (o+pgY)


Now that's just mean.

Posted by: OregonMuse, deplorable since 2004 at November 18, 2016 05:22 PM (IvkyT)

439 "What is Canadian whiskey, really? "

They add Rye to the mash....
Lightens it up....
My neighbor owns a brewery...adds Rye to some of his ales...very nice

Posted by: Beto Ochoa (@Beto_In_Austin) at November 18, 2016 05:22 PM (hCdMd)

440 Lift body #2 is lost, Emergency

Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 05:22 PM (GH68B)

441 What are you doing sitting down? Chairs are for winners. Go stand by the counter, preferably in the corner, loser.

Nope, not in a conciliatory mood. At. All.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at November 18, 2016 05:22 PM (kTF2Z)

442 Steel Panther.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 05:23 PM (g6yUI)

443 420
I expect Hills to die by inhaling her own vomit. The sound track will be Cry, Baby by Janis Joplin.

Posted by: Northernlurker at November 18, 2016 05:18 PM (hJrjt)

Well, we're not sure whose vomit it actually was, it's not like you can dust vomit for fingerprints - Nigel Tufnel.

Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at November 18, 2016 05:23 PM (uWAzI)

444 My liberal friends have turned into Stella 500. Who can get a word in?

Posted by: Headless Body of Agnew at November 18, 2016 05:23 PM (FtrY1)

445 441 What are you doing sitting down? Chairs are for winners. Go stand by the counter, preferably in the corner, loser.

Nope, not in a conciliatory mood. At. All.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at November 18, 2016 05:22 PM (kTF2Z)


Lol. Word.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob, 'Hobo, the other white meat' at November 18, 2016 05:24 PM (uz/Pv)

446 So Jeb has definitely been ruled out of any cabinet position then.
Posted by: buzzion at November 18, 2016 05:22 PM (z/Ubi)




heh

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 05:24 PM (cPsPa)

447 442 Steel Panther.
Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 05:23 PM (g6yUI)



They just had a new album come out not that long ago.

Posted by: buzzion at November 18, 2016 05:24 PM (z/Ubi)

448 So Donna Brazille that paragon of virtue

-
Donna Brazille Wax [shudder]

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, This Is the Dawning of the Age of the Trumpius! at November 18, 2016 05:24 PM (Nwg0u)

449 Now that's just mean.
Posted by: OregonMuse



I know, right? :-)

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 05:24 PM (o+pgY)

450

So M.Obama dress designer says she wont work with Melania

Who cares. Why would she wear those couch covers

Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 05:25 PM (6sKx5)

451 As Abe Lincoln once said, yes Mary, I'd love to see a play. It would really clear my mind.

Posted by: Duke Lowell at November 18, 2016 05:25 PM (kTF2Z)

452 And Trump could reach out to the ghey community by having the London Boys perform.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 05:25 PM (g6yUI)

453 As Mel Gibson said ' first you will blow me. Freedommmmm!'

Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at November 18, 2016 05:26 PM (IDPbH)

454 449 Now that's just mean.

Posted by: OregonMuse

I know, right? :-)

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 05:24 PM (o+pgY)


LMAO..Oh God. The meaner it is the more I spit laugh. I'm going to hell.

Posted by: Cannibal Bob, 'Hobo, the other white meat' at November 18, 2016 05:26 PM (uz/Pv)

455 So M.Obama dress designer says she wont work with Melania

Who cares. Why would she wear those couch covers
Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 05:25 PM (6sKx5)



oh noes!, no lv tennis shoes, no burlap. no unknown affirmative action first nations designers. no hoodies. no hood chic.

guess Melania will have to keep shopping in Paris.

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 05:27 PM (cPsPa)

456 CNN Headline (breathlessly)



TRUMP'S RIGHT TURN



President-Elect Taps Hardliners

----------

How can Hitler make a right turn?

Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 05:27 PM (tHwdc)

457 I so admire you people.

My Thanksgiving plans are up in the air, and I might actually be alone for the holiday, which will be peaceful, and keep my from reciting every stock phase that my dad drilled into my head over the years. I'm pretty sure that if I was in liberal company and I didn't care about what they thought, I'd be repeating "How could you be so stupid?" like a broken record.

There's also:

"Use your head for something other than a hat rack."

"If you had a brain you'd be dangerous."

Please feel free to use, courtesy of Shibumi's Dad, who is no longer with us.

Posted by: shibumi, a deplorable who now just wants to yell at stupid people at November 18, 2016 05:28 PM (0sm03)

458 what is the over under on the obamas getting a divorce after leafing the wh?

Posted by: yankeefifth at November 18, 2016 05:28 PM (cPsPa)

459 CNN Headline (breathlessly)

TRUMP'S RIGHT TURN

But...he's a liberal!!!

Posted by: Meremortal, Bigly Matters at November 18, 2016 05:28 PM (qxDn6)

460 LOL!

Y'all know the NYT hated to print this:

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/11/19/world/middleeast/trump-muslims-middle-east.html?_r=0

Posted by: SMFH at the crybabies at November 18, 2016 05:29 PM (CRotO)

461 So M.Obama dress designer says she wont work with Melania

Who cares. Why would she wear those couch covers
Posted by: ThunderB at November 18, 2016 05:25 PM (6sKx5)

Someone on Twitter pointed out that if bakers must bale cakes, then designers must dress clients.

Can't discriminate!

Posted by: Votermom the Deplorable @vm on Gab.ai at November 18, 2016 05:29 PM (Om16U)

462 NPR All Things Considered, tonight is going to make sure you know all the bad things about the Trump appointments. Racist (among other things) seems to be the bottom line for all three announced. I'm sure they will do this for them all.

Posted by: Colin at November 18, 2016 05:29 PM (Be5Pb)

463 Trump will drop out any minute and hand the election to Hillary.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 05:29 PM (g6yUI)

464
So..

did Ace like the movie?

Posted by: Simon Strange Bear at November 18, 2016 05:29 PM (cQ2Cj)

465 Posted by: shibumi, a deplorable who now just wants to yell at stupid people at November 18, 2016 05:28 PM (0sm03)

Mine used to say after someone said ' I think ... ' ,

that's what happens when you're not used to thinking.

Posted by: Sebastian Melmoth at November 18, 2016 05:30 PM (IDPbH)

466 There are many great zingers available through simply quoting Obama.

Following gnashing of teeth over the vote:

"I hear you. You know, Obama said "My policies are on the ballot."

Posted by: Meremortal, Bigly Matters at November 18, 2016 05:31 PM (qxDn6)

467 "Surprisingly, some Iraqis seem less offended by Mr. Trump's comments linking terrorism to Islam than American liberals."

---

Heh.

Some people are so fucking clueless.

Posted by: SMFH at the crybabies at November 18, 2016 05:31 PM (CRotO)

468 I'm really looking forward to the side eye Mooch is going to give Melania at the inauguration.


Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 04:37 PM (PY9jH)

-------
That Mooch-face should be the meme for stink-eye.

Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 05:32 PM (tHwdc)

469 After everything stupid they say just shake your head in disbelief and put your head in your hands..and when they say "What?!"

Just say 'nothing, go on.'

Of course when I try that it comes out..


HAVE YOU BEEN TAKING F*CKING STUPID PILLS OR WHAT!!?

Posted by: Cannibal Bob, 'Hobo, the other white meat' at November 18, 2016 05:33 PM (uz/Pv)

470 >>>So Donna Brazille that paragon of virtue<<<

I am utterly fascinated by women like Michelle Obama and Donna Brazile who are foolhardy proponents of green energy and climate change yet don't even have the slightest inkling that the one point twenty-one gigawatt-hours of energy required to straighten their hair comes from coal-fired plants, not windmills and solar panels.

Posted by: Fritz at November 18, 2016 05:35 PM (6uMKl)

471 "Surprisingly, some Iraqis seem less offended by Mr. Trump's comments linking terrorism to Islam than American liberals."

These would be Iraqis who have been watching people get blown up in the name of Islam for decades, now.

Those people have no time for western liberal fantasies.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 05:35 PM (g6yUI)

472 Jeebus. The People Mag. site where the "designer" is bragging that she won't dress Melania....

The commenters are calling Melania a whore. One even said, "Michelle was a successful lawyer blah blah blah...."

Liberal tolerance on full display.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 05:35 PM (PY9jH)

473 Posted by: shibumi, a deplorable who now just wants to yell at stupid people at November 18, 2016 05:28 PM (0sm03)
---
I've (rarely, since I'm in such high demand as a m(i/a)ngler) had some nice, peaceful holidays on my lonesome. You can bop around in your BVDs, listen to good music, eat what you want when you want, and take in an MST3K marathon or game without having to be "on". It can be nice.

Sometimes you just wanna sit around in your robe and huff whipped cream in a can.

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 05:36 PM (EnKk6)

474 "I don't know how I'm going to make it with that squirrel haired clown for four years."

"I hear you. You just know Big Mullet is behind all this."

"I know, right?!"

Posted by: The Media Suxs at November 18, 2016 05:36 PM (iJ2/J)

475 So M.Obama dress designer says she wont work with Melania


-
Breaking: Interior decorator who put tire swing in Michelle's rumpus room won't do the same for Melania.

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, This Is the Dawning of the Age of the Trumpius! at November 18, 2016 05:37 PM (Nwg0u)

476
"Use your head for something other than a hat rack."

"If you had a brain you'd be dangerous."
---
Dad: If brains were dynamite, you wouldn't have enough to fart!"

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 05:38 PM (EnKk6)

477 https://tinyurl.com/jsccg3y

FB Meme on Bigfoot

Posted by: Evilpens at November 18, 2016 05:39 PM (y3aQB)

478 Trump voters are racist!

"I know! I'm trying to figure out how those folks in the northern tier states and PA went from Obama voters to racists in 4 years."

Posted by: Meremortal, Bigly Matters at November 18, 2016 05:39 PM (qxDn6)

479 So M.Obama dress designer says she wont work with Melania


I can get horse blankets at a tack shop.

Posted by: Mr. Peebles at November 18, 2016 05:41 PM (g6yUI)

480
So I guess "Fuck you, we won. Now kiss my ass." isn't conducive to family harmony on Thanksgiving, hmmm?

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 18, 2016 05:42 PM (LuZz8)

481 You know Hillary would have won if Republicans hadn't gerrymandered the Electoral College.

Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at November 18, 2016 05:43 PM (uWAzI)

482 I think the proper response to any whining is to say, "In the immortal words of Barack Hussein Obama, 'I won.'"

Now shaddup and pass the gravy.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 05:43 PM (PY9jH)

483 What, are you crying? There's no crying in Thanksgiving! Button your lip or I'll give you something to cry about!

Posted by: Duke Lowell at November 18, 2016 05:44 PM (kTF2Z)

484 My favorite debate/conversation tool is the completely invented statistic.

When using the fake statistic, I find it most effective to use odd numbers or decimals.

"Health insurance premiums are up 268% in the last 2 years. Explain that. 268%. No, seriously explain to me how that is good policy? 268% and worse yet, 63.6% of the new individuals receiving health insurance are paying more out of pocket than they did before ACA when they were uninsured. That's damned near two thirds of them. It's a damned dumpster fire."

Don't be afraid to make up statistics. Hell, I read a study that something like 73% of statistics are made up on the spot anyway.

Posted by: Malcolm Tent at November 18, 2016 05:45 PM (JUgHN)

485 Looks like the lefties are pushing the idea that no one talk about politics this Turkey Day and I think that is a great idea.

Posted by: wodun at November 18, 2016 05:45 PM (MnbWw)

486 485
Looks like the lefties are pushing the idea that no one talk about politics this Turkey Day and I think that is a great idea.

Posted by: wodun at November 18, 2016 05:45 PM (MnbWw)

It's a trap - Admiral Akbar

Posted by: The Mouse that Roared at November 18, 2016 05:46 PM (uWAzI)

487 Looks like the lefties are pushing the idea that no one talk about politics this Turkey Day and I think that is a great idea.



FTS. Time to eat a huge bag o' dicks!

Posted by: rickb223 at November 18, 2016 05:49 PM (o+pgY)

488 What an unfeeling article!

Your guest is hurting, and family is the greatest safe space. Use that safe space to help your guest feel included and start the healing process.
-- When your guest asks what he/she/xe can bring, suggest A VAT OF THEIR DELICIOUS LIBERAL TEARS! This helps them feel special, providing a dish only they can bring.
--Your guest is feeling confused and searching for answers as to why Trump is happening. Provide them with concise answers such as "BECAUSE YOU AND EVERYONE WHO THINKS LIKE YOU IS A LOOOOOOOOSER". This comforts them, and makes them realize it is not them who is at fault -- it is their loser-ness.
-- Your guest may be worried about being bullied and heckled by Trump-loving strangers. Help them prepare for this by relentlessly heckling them throughout the meal. By being bullied in a safe, nurturing, family environment, they will be prepared for the disdain and callous disregard to be heaped upon them by a cold, uncaring world.
-- There are lots of reports of Trump related hate crimes at colleges. Strangely, many of them are coming from left-leaning colleges. Even more strangely, the perpetrators never seem to get caught. Shield them from these awful crimes by cutting off their funding.
--If your guest is a vegetarian, ensure there is plenty of health-giving meat available to give them strength to get through the next four to sixteen years.

I am sure you can think of many other good ideas.

Posted by: Sweet Lou at November 18, 2016 05:51 PM (Fzaq0)

489 Thanksgivingmanship - If someone asks how you voted, you could always say: "What difference - at this point, what difference does it make?" You *know* what will be assumed.

Just keepin' the peace.

Posted by: Hans O'lo at November 18, 2016 05:55 PM (oEr1p)

490 353 Watching Thunderbirds Are Go 1966 on ThisTV, And I don't know why.
Posted by: Skip-hoping Trump at least does random conservative acts at November 18, 2016 04:55 PM (GH68B)

My favorite as a Kid was #2-the big green transporter.

Posted by: Keith not a one-named troll at November 18, 2016 06:00 PM (USf3s)

491 4. Tell him you were going to vote for her, but then you realized you had to have a vagina to do that.

Posted by: SH at November 18, 2016 04:57 PM (gmeXX)

===========
I used to have one, but TRUMP GRABBED IT AND STOLE IT

Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 06:01 PM (tHwdc)

492 436 So Donna Brazille that paragon of virtue is demanding that Sessions not be allowed to be AJ.... Racism or something...

I would love to be on the show to tell her that he's sure to be confirmed because someone will leak him the questions.

Posted by: Mr. Midwest Voter at November 18, 2016 06:19 PM (WJO4x)

493 To quote Barak Obama:

"I Won."

Posted by: WinLinBSDAdmin at November 18, 2016 06:21 PM (B11vO)

494 Dad: If brains were dynamite, you wouldn't have enough to fart!"

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 05:38 PM (EnKk6)

----------
Miley's Deplorable Dad: "You must have been brushing your teeth with gunpowder again - you're shooting your mouth off."

Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 06:22 PM (tHwdc)

495 472 Jeebus. The People Mag. site where the "designer" is bragging that she won't dress Melania....

The commenters are calling Melania a whore. One even said, "Michelle was a successful lawyer blah blah blah...."

Liberal tolerance on full display.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at November 18, 2016 05:35 PM (PY9jH)

I'd ask about the successful cases she's had at trial.

Posted by: WinLinBSDAdmin at November 18, 2016 06:23 PM (B11vO)

496 Lib SIL wants me to bring an appetizer - shall I bring a YUGE bag o' dicks?

Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 06:26 PM (tHwdc)

497 Started out only a turkey and not ham this year, but Mrs. E has dictated a ham there must be. So a ham will be cooked on Wednesday, and turkey on Thursday. Is this a great country or what?

Posted by: Eromero at November 18, 2016 06:32 PM (zLDYs)

498 496 Lib SIL wants me to bring an appetizer - shall I bring a YUGE bag o' dicks?
Posted by: Miley, Duchess of the Deplorable Standard Rednecks at November 18, 2016 06:26 PM (tHwdc)
---
You know, if you're creative with homemade breadsticks...

Posted by: All Hail Eris, She-Wolf of the 'Ettes 'Ettes at November 18, 2016 06:32 PM (EnKk6)

499 I find the best way to deal with this is to give the little shit interloper a nice, condescending, simpering smile, and say "Yes, dear. Now let us adults talk."

One of three things will happen: s/he will sit there in a glowering sulk; s/he will get up and leave (with or without making a mess of the table in the process); s/he will persist in his/her ass-hattedness desire to enlighten. The first two are more or less inconsequential. If s/he chooses the third outcome, just repeat the process. It eventually ends. Drearily, but it will end.

Posted by: LCMS Rulz! at November 18, 2016 06:42 PM (o7l6R)

500
When the little commie fucker starts saying "No politics on Thanksgiving! The holidays should just be for family talk!", pull out your phone and ask 'em to repeat it on camera.

Next year should be even more fun.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 18, 2016 06:46 PM (LuZz8)

501 Couldn't do some minor proofreading on a re-post, eh? Must be all the gainzz.

Posted by: MadMike at November 18, 2016 07:07 PM (oYMj9)

502 186 @ a-1
I've long maintained, in conversation, that America should base her immigration policies on Mexico's.

Posted by: Rebecca at November 18, 2016 08:29 PM (ZHm8z)

503 I've long maintained, in conversation, that America should base her immigration policies on Mexico's.
Posted by: Rebecca at November 18, 2016 08:29 PM (ZHm8z)

====

Nobody should have an issue with that.

Posted by: JustBeingHonest at November 18, 2016 11:53 PM (s11c2)

504 Better not to worry about making the SJWs cry because, and I have experience with this, ANYTHING will make them cry. They are anticipating the possibility of disagreement, which means they are anticipating erupting in seething anger (since that is their constant and only reaction to disagreement), which means they are primed to erupt in seething anger, which means they WILL erupt in seething anger.

Sorry but it is nonsensical to even think about subtle tee-hee avoidance strategies. Speak like a normal human being and ENJOY THE ERUPTIONS!

Posted by: Alec Rawls at November 19, 2016 02:57 AM (2HzzU)

505
Be the heartless cat, playing with its prey.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Irredeemable Cycling Stars (TM) at November 19, 2016 05:49 AM (BK3ZS)

506 Having a war about religion is like having a fight over who's got the best imaginary friend

Quote by Yasser Arafat, Chairman of the Palestinian Liberation Organisation (1929 - 2004).

Posted by: Ok at November 19, 2016 09:15 AM (EJZxz)

507 "Be the heartless cat, playing with its prey. "

Cats love their prey. They play with their prey to death. My cats bring their dead prey to me in hopes I can bring their prey back to life.

Posted by: Ok at November 19, 2016 09:18 AM (EJZxz)

508 Shame! You are an evil man; you made me laugh so hard I snorted coffee out my nose.
--My grandfather would just nod and say.
"You don't say?"
"How about that?"
"Isn't that something?"
and then repeat the sequence. Sometimes you vary it a bit.
As Franz Kafka said, "ich bin ein cockenroacher!" And he had a really Czech'ered career.

Posted by: Chuck Moss at November 19, 2016 07:47 PM (H/315)

509 Posted by: alexthechick - so so itchy at November 18, 2016 03:51 PM (mf5HN)
---
This is a very Trumpian display of feral alpha aggression.
>>>>>>And your superior alpha pie-eating skills will be passed on to the next generation.

Darwin, baby.
**************************

OH, they have been! LOL Gotta eat pie!

Posted by: Deplorable Kell at November 20, 2016 04:12 AM (o2NAO)

510 322 I'm certainly looking forward to having a First Lady who hasn't flunked a bar exam.

*************************

I'd be happy its a female.....

Posted by: Deplorable Kell at November 20, 2016 04:52 AM (o2NAO)

511 The deal is, I wouldn't be able to use those very amusing tropes because my laugh squelching mechanism has really degraded since retirement. And, my Dad would definitely choke out a yuuuuge guffaw so any nominal squelch would fail at that point.

Posted by: Anna Mac at November 21, 2016 06:16 PM (xujfC)

512 "More people are killed in this country every year by pigs than sharks".

""If you feed a cow cheese it will die".

(both by me to my kids or their friends, their friends believed me, my kids know better)

Posted by: Natalie Hobbs at November 21, 2016 07:40 PM (wBDZi)

513 Dad: You don't know anything because I haven't told you yet.

Children should be seen and not heard, but not seen too much.

Yes, you are adopted.

When you're dead, you're dead.

Mom: Wait til your father gets home.

I really hated that last one. Mom would halfheartedly slap at us with a dishtowel. Dad would whale with the belt.

Posted by: Anna Mac at November 21, 2016 08:54 PM (xujfC)

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