Create a "Virtual Model" of Yourself

Ahem. If this has any use besides some sort of prelude to sex (actual/phone/cyber), I need to know what the hell it could be.

Damnit, every time I do it I come out looking like either that blonde doofus on 90210 or Normal Fell from Three's Company. I must be pushing the wrong buttons.

H/t to Witty Sex Kitten.

And thanks for that link to My Pet Jawa, who confesses frustration at having to compete with someone calling herself "Witty Sex Kitten," and who has changed his name to Hot Lesbo Star Wars Chick Pundit in retalliation. It's pretty funny.

Finally! I Nailed It! The perfect vitual model of Ace! It's almost like they digitized me just like they did to Susan Dey in Looker!


Ladies, I hope you brought your appetites.

Beef-- It's what's for fuckin' dinner.

Posted by: Ace at 12:27 AM


1 "Ace - the other white meat"

Posted by: Patton at December 15, 2004 12:46 AM (cLlFA)

2 Please read, if you haven't already, this morning's Washington Post article describing how the voting "foul-ups appeared particularly acute in Democratic-leaning districts, according to interviews with voters, poll workers, election observers and election board and party officials, as well as an examination of precinct voting patterns in several cities."


or: WP

For those of you with weak hearts, try to control your rage as you read this...

Posted by: Igor Volsky at December 15, 2004 01:02 AM (tfsAT)

3 As if Erik Estrada hadn't damaged me enough...

Posted by: someone at December 15, 2004 01:51 AM (S22v9)

4 This virtual modeling software is used online at Check it out.

Posted by: Jacarutu at December 15, 2004 03:45 AM (HpMGy)

5 Jabba the Hutt with hair.

Igor - my rage is uncontrollable!
Demos are still whining!

Posted by: barbula at December 15, 2004 07:28 AM (eGw+M)

6 BTW do I get at least blogrolled for this shit! I think you should put it under a fun new category-Hot Lesbo Star Wars Chick Pundits. :-)

Posted by: Wittysexkitten at December 15, 2004 08:58 AM (YQfmQ)

7 Hmmm I had a comment before the one requesting a blog roll and it seems to have disappeared?

What I had said was that your man boobs are bigger than my virtual model's. I can recommend an excellent brand of BRO support for those things. And you should've at least put a button down and some khaki's on him, because no one wants to look at that shit-only my virtual model gets to prance around in a bikini okay?

And I put the virtual model up btw because I had already gotten "I'm a perv! Send me a pic!" e-mails and as I have explained, in order to protect my future career and appease some lonely readers-I figured she was good enough to fulfill the fantasy. So sadly I am not up for phone/cyber/animal/republican on democrat sex. Sorry to dissapoint.

Thanks for the hat tip.

Posted by: wittysexkitten at December 15, 2004 09:37 AM (YQfmQ)

8 Good Lord, Ace. If I wanted to see things like that, I'd spend more time hanging out at Boi from Troi...

Posted by: utron at December 15, 2004 10:44 AM (CgIkY)

9 HEY, you and I must have been separated at birth.


(PS: actually, the results I got didn't look like that but they DID look a lot like me. It was admitedly a little weird.)

Posted by: bbeck at December 15, 2004 11:34 AM (qF8q3)

10 Agh! Curse my compulsive link-clicking eyes!

Was that necessary? Was that called for?

Posted by: Dianna at December 15, 2004 11:37 AM (qrFCz)

11 1) Tab order is fixed! Woo hoo!
2) So sadly I am not up for phone/cyber/animal/republican on democrat sex.Not even dolphin sex? (I won't link it out of respect for ace)

Posted by: fat kid at December 15, 2004 12:40 PM (yHxMk)

12 Close it up, dammit!


Ze goggles, zhey do nutting, NUTTING!!!

Posted by: hobgoblin at December 15, 2004 01:34 PM (2da3S)

13 Ace,

I believe Mr. Paul Anka was correct in his opinions on the necessity of a certain item of men’s clothing. Perhaps Mr. Anka’s beliefs were derived from his sitting down to his browser one morning and being bitch slapped with a shot of man-tits. I don’t know.

Posted by: John at December 15, 2004 01:41 PM (6lvw6)

14 Thanks for link, but my eyes!! Good lord my eyes, they burn!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Rusty Shackleford at December 15, 2004 02:15 PM (JQjhA)

15 That image was way too much information.

Now I know why they invented burkas.

Posted by: johnd01 at December 15, 2004 03:39 PM (dSm4g)

16 Don't listen to 'em, Ace! Nothing wrong with being hefty but fer cryin' out loud, get a haircut!

Posted by: rapidtransit at December 15, 2004 04:11 PM (huExq)

17 Heh. I managed to get the body pretty much right but I couldn't get the face close at all (which is probably because they were using reasonably pretty faces).

Posted by: Kathy K at December 15, 2004 08:29 PM (shBkj)

18 It's all about marketing. Once you complete your model you can go 'shopping' with it. There are links provided for various clothiers with whom your model can try on their wares/wears.

I used the model builder for something better than a virtual mirror. I created the ideal man. Well, almost...they offer have the wire-rimmed glasses accessory I crave.

Posted by: jmflynny at December 15, 2004 11:13 PM (itNrh)

19 didn't offer....

Posted by: jmflynny at December 15, 2004 11:14 PM (itNrh)

20 Tiny feet. TINY feet. TINY ITTY BITTY feet.
This breaks a little cowgirl's heart.

Posted by: Auspex at December 16, 2004 10:11 AM (uyWNd)

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