DVR Hoarding, a National Menace

I did this bit on the Breitbart site last night. I would have done it here, but it was ONT time.

[T]here's a sense of satisfaction in having a DVR that's filled up to the 98%-- CRITICAL--YOU MUST DELETE SOME PROGRAMS IMMEDIATELY level. Kind of like that feeling you get opening a Craftsman toolbox stuffed to the brim with tools. That you're prepared for any contingency.

Or it's like putting on all the TV's and lights in a hotel room the moment you get there and keeping them on all night long when you're out. As a friend pointed out to me, "If you're not sucking out every bit of free juice the hotel is providing you, you're losing money -- think about it."

I did, and now I do that every time I travel.

And if you don't think that's funny, then here's something cute. Apparently otters hold paws with each other while they sleep on the water.

via linlithgow

Posted by: Ace at 12:55 PM



Comments

1
Oh, hell's yea! Let those lights burn!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at February 20, 2013 12:57 PM (8V4jN)

2 Otters are cute, but please bear in mind, like all wild animals, they're total dicks!

Posted by: BuckIV at February 20, 2013 12:57 PM (gedHR)

3
I'm visiting the future of health care - the DMV.

Charming experience, simply charming...

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at February 20, 2013 12:58 PM (8V4jN)

4 I believe those are actually some type of weasel...

Posted by: Sgt. Fury at February 20, 2013 12:58 PM (RM5S6)

5 Diet thread. Zero calories.

Posted by: maddogg at February 20, 2013 12:58 PM (OlN4e)

6 Except when your DVR is filled with reruns of Three's Company. There is no satisfaction in that.

Posted by: wooga at February 20, 2013 12:59 PM (jBgKG)

7 You sure that's a boy otter and a girl otter? Because fags.

Posted by: Dang at February 20, 2013 12:59 PM (R18D0)

8 I turn on the climate control too.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Offering Moobats Gasoline and Matches at February 20, 2013 12:59 PM (0q2P7)

9 OK, I admit I squee'd at the otters.

But I curse my DVR!!! Damn you and your choices of TV shows that must be erased for the sake of your space requirements! Damn you straight to hell!!

Posted by: Darth Chipmunk at February 20, 2013 12:59 PM (0tRzD)

10 7 You sure that's a boy otter and a girl otter? Because fags.
Posted by: Dang at February 20, 2013 12:59 PM (R18D0)

____________________

Or it could be physics--and they know the Bernoulli principle.

Posted by: tasker at February 20, 2013 01:00 PM (r2PLg)

11 >>>Diet thread. Zero calories.

yeah except that part where I posted something I'd written that I was proud of and thought it might entertain people.

Hang on, let me link real fast the shit that everyone else links. I wouldn't want to do anything at all different from every other of the ten thousand bloggers.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:00 PM (LCRYB)

12
Tended a small zoo in my town as a yoot that had otters on display.

Heard, all too frequently, the phrase, "We oughter change the otter water, eh?"

Didn't strangle the speaker, but often wanted to.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at February 20, 2013 01:00 PM (8V4jN)

13 Otters fight rape by adopting the buddy system, Ace.

Posted by: garrett at February 20, 2013 01:00 PM (X1SGf)

14 Or may this? http://youtu.be/KIePsbJSS04

Posted by: ParisParamus at February 20, 2013 01:01 PM (h1VOU)

15 Guesswhut! Ah don habe no DBR, and I have found life is still worth living.

Posted by: maddogg at February 20, 2013 01:01 PM (OlN4e)

16 Stop your cooing bitchez and let me nap!

Posted by: Otter #1 at February 20, 2013 01:01 PM (r2PLg)

17 [Proffers Man Card] Awwwwwwwww, that so CUUUUUUUTE!.

Posted by: joncelli at February 20, 2013 01:01 PM (RD7QR)

18 My DVR has at least four Super Bowls on it. I like having the original broadcasts over the chopped up things the NFL puts out after the year is over. Not every football game has to be romanticized.

Posted by: Shoot Me at February 20, 2013 01:01 PM (qiXMt)

19 Is it hard to fill up a DVR? I don't have one so I wouldn't really know, but it feels like you might be setting the bar for self-satisfaction kind of low.

Posted by: Gristle Encased Head at February 20, 2013 01:01 PM (+lsX1)

20 I'll put up a Drudge link. That should be satisfactory.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:01 PM (LCRYB)

21
Those otters?

They're better than us.

Just sayin'...

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at February 20, 2013 01:02 PM (8V4jN)

22
that part where I posted something I'd written that I was proud of and thought it might entertain people.


That was my favorite part.
After the Otters holding hands.

Posted by: garrett at February 20, 2013 01:02 PM (X1SGf)

23 You can't trust an Otter. Any creature with that much natural resemblance to John Bolton is just unnatural.

Posted by: Darth Chipmunk at February 20, 2013 01:02 PM (0tRzD)

24 On the DVR front, does anyone know of one that will work with the DISH satellite stuff (HD) that does not require contacting them to enable it (and thus have to pay $10/month) for the privilege of hooking up your own equipment?

Posted by: Vic at February 20, 2013 01:02 PM (53z96)

25 Coons hold hands too. When they're not selling you crack.

Posted by: Alec Baldwin at February 20, 2013 01:02 PM (UU0OF)

26 By holding hands, don't they look even more delicious to great whites?

Posted by: I chase him - I bite him at February 20, 2013 01:03 PM (6J6x7)

27 Otters are a type of weasel, aren't they?

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 20, 2013 01:03 PM (UOM48)

28 Have you ever seen something so overbearingly cute you just want to start kicking it?

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 01:03 PM (yCvxi)

29
Is it hard to fill up a DVR?

Well, it's not like after the Risotto.

Posted by: DVR at February 20, 2013 01:03 PM (X1SGf)

30 maddogg,

I get a say in what I find interesting, too.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:04 PM (LCRYB)

31 TANSTAAFL.... There Aint NO Such Thing as a Free Lunch...

By burning all the electricty, the power costs of the Hotel Rise, so they raise Prices.... which means the NEXT time you stay there, prices are higher...

As this attitude becomes systemic? YOU pay for OTHER peoples electricity... because that cost WILL be passed on...

Sad that otherwise smart people, don't realize this...

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 20, 2013 01:04 PM (lZBBB)

32 11 >>>Diet thread. Zero calories.

yeah except that part where I posted something I'd written that I was proud of and thought it might entertain people.

Hang on, let me link real fast the shit that everyone else links. I wouldn't want to do anything at all different from every other of the ten thousand bloggers.
Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:00 PM (LCRYB)

________________

Exactly why I loathe Glenn Reynolds.

Indeed.

Posted by: Otter #1 at February 20, 2013 01:04 PM (r2PLg)

33 19 Gristle Encased head,

Not too hard usually ~100-175 hours in SD or 45-60 in HD

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:04 PM (LRFds)

34
@ 25
Heh

Posted by: maddogg at February 20, 2013 01:05 PM (OlN4e)

35 Otters can make pretty good jug band music. Or so I learned a few years ago.

Posted by: Vic at February 20, 2013 01:05 PM (53z96)

36
I'd rather have a full PBR than a full DVR. Emptying the former would be far more satisfying...

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at February 20, 2013 01:05 PM (QlTaC)

37 :::Or it's like putting on all the TV's and lights in a hotel room the moment you get there and keeping them on all night long when you're out. As a friend pointed out to me, "If you're not sucking out every bit of free juice the hotel is providing you, you're losing money -- think about it.":::

It's a good start, but Lifemanship is all about the little details.

Soap, shampoo, conditioner and shower cap. If you don't unwrap and uncap them, the hotel will just leave them for the next customer. What's that? Just take them and put them in your luggage?

Fuck. THAT.

When you take these items, all the maid has to do is replace them. When you unwrap them and leave them strewn about, the maid has to clean up the mess and THEN replace them. What, you're going to give the hotel your free labor? Don't be a sucker and let these people laze around all day on your nickel.

You're paying for it.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:05 PM (CJjw5)

38 31 Romeo 13,

worse still people finally accept that Soc Sec is generational theft and are PROUD of it....

I want a pay as you go world

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:05 PM (LRFds)

39 I did not intend to offend Ace. Just a crack.

Posted by: maddogg at February 20, 2013 01:06 PM (OlN4e)

40 Get a bigger HD?

Watch some shows?

Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 01:06 PM (GQ8sn)

41 Dawning of the Sea Otters is one of my fav South Park eps.

Posted by: garrett at February 20, 2013 01:06 PM (X1SGf)

42
I think the part you're missing about the electricity is that it's "obviously a joke."

When someone says something very very off, there's a very high chance they're having you on.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:06 PM (LCRYB)

43 You forgot to leave the water running in the sink and the tub. Because free water. I should bottle that shit and sell it in the lobby but I'm too busy filling my ice bucket with ice and throwing it in the trash.

Posted by: Dang at February 20, 2013 01:06 PM (R18D0)

44 I am tired of my wife bitching at me to fast forward the commercials on recorded programs. When am I supposed to post ? WTF ? can't a guy watch TV and surf the internet while eating dinner.

Posted by: The Jackhole at February 20, 2013 01:07 PM (nTgAI)

45


Ace should have a movie night, and invite all of us.

Posted by: beach at February 20, 2013 01:07 PM (LpQbZ)

46 Of course if you actually own your DVR (MythTV for me) you never worry about filling it. If I ever manage to fill my current 1.5TB drive I'll buy a second drive. Or start transcoding the MPEG-2 the cable company sends into MPEG-4.

The downside is I will never see 'premium' HD content. And 'premium' is getting defined down, now all NBC/U programming is 'premium.'

Posted by: John Morris at February 20, 2013 01:07 PM (YhRJW)

47 Fuck you, ace, you just accidentally made me burst into tears at my desk.

When the BFF got so sick and I went to take care of her, one of the nurses asked why it was that I was doing everything instead of her family. The BFF asked her if she'd ever seen how the otters hold hands when sleeping so as not to drift off and the nurse said yes. The BFF waved at me and said "She's my otter".


Excuse me, I have to go throatpunch a hippie to feel better.

Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:08 PM (VtjlW)

48 >>>It's a good start, but Lifemanship is all about the little details.

hey did you read it?

It's funny but what I learned from that (comedy) book is, "Well, this is all basically real, this is basically the main thrust of all human interactions in socially competitive environments."

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:08 PM (LCRYB)

49 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFJ2jxIe4CQ

Posted by: Vic at February 20, 2013 01:08 PM (53z96)

50 It's OK Ace. Feel free to butt in anytime you feel like it.


Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 01:08 PM (qyv02)

51 *comes sprinting in from previous thread* Help! There's nekkid Helen Thomas on the last thread and I need to find a would-be rapist so my vomit doesn't go to waste!

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:08 PM (4df7R)

52 I was at that aquarium in Vancouver 3 years ago. This video is so old that both of those otters are dead now.

(They feed the corpses to the killer whales)

Posted by: Captain Buzzkill at February 20, 2013 01:08 PM (9ZAcB)

53 Posted by: Romeo13 at February 20, 2013 01:04 PM (lZBBB)


Bingo. Intentionally driving up business owners' costs. Great plan. As a former business owner, allow me - on behalf of current business owners - to toss a big "fuck you" to people with this attitude.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 01:09 PM (yCvxi)

54
Holy crap - finished at the DMV already!

Should I worry about the "Place on Death Panel's Priority List" that they stamped on my vehicle's title?

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at February 20, 2013 01:09 PM (eFLi6)

55 {{alexthechick}}

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:09 PM (4df7R)

56 although my friend really does do that and say that.

But he's doing it because it's funny. Not because he really thinks he's getting some value out of wasting electricity.


Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:09 PM (LCRYB)

57
Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:08 PM (VtjlW)

Damn. If I didn't fear and love you, I'd be making with the clam jokes.

Posted by: garrett at February 20, 2013 01:10 PM (X1SGf)

58 >>>Bingo. Intentionally driving up business owners' costs. Great plan. As a former business owner, allow me - on behalf of current business owners - to toss a big "fuck you" to people with this attitude.

you guys must have majored in Not Getting It.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:10 PM (LCRYB)

59 42 Ace,

I used to think that, hell my sense of humor is based on it.

Grammy Sammy Kinison made a living that way....

nowadays it is baseline.

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:10 PM (LRFds)

60 Holy crap - finished at the DMV already!

Wow! Speedy delivery! Did you check to make sure you still have all your kidneys?

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:11 PM (4df7R)

61 Was out fishing in Prince William Sound. Out in the middle of no where we ran into a "pod"? of about 100 otters just floating on their backs, sleeping, playing. Doing what otters do. It was pretty cool. Never seen anything like that.

Posted by: Bosk at February 20, 2013 01:11 PM (n2K+4)

62 Excuse me, I have to go throatpunch a hippie to feel better.

Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:08 PM (VtjlW)


Shall I unchain the Ravage?

Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 01:11 PM (da5Wo)

63 47 AlexTheChick,

make it two and I'll smile through the blinky box with you

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:11 PM (LRFds)

64 although my friend really does do that and say that.

But he's doing it because it's funny. Not because he really thinks he's getting some value out of wasting electricity.


Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:09 PM (LCRYB)



My all time favorite petty revenge was Larry David saying that when his divorce from Laurie David was final, he came home and turned on every light in the house because fuck the environment.

Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:11 PM (VtjlW)

65 They're holding hands so they don't let their rage get the best of them and rip your faces off. "We're fucking trying to sleep!"

Posted by: t-bird at February 20, 2013 01:12 PM (FcR7P)

66 Not having a DVR or cable TV I never had this problem. If you can torrent it, you don't need to save it.


Posted by: @PurpAv at February 20, 2013 01:12 PM (/gHaE)

67 Of course if you actually own your DVR

Yea, we have a hellacious amount of space, too. We replaced the drive in our as well.

Posted by: beach at February 20, 2013 01:13 PM (LpQbZ)

68 you guys must have majored in Not Getting It.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:10 PM (LCRYB)


What the fuck was that?!!?!? Something just flew right over the top of my head! No seriously! Did you see what it was????

Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 01:13 PM (da5Wo)

69 :::hey did you read it? It's funny but what I learned from that (comedy) book is, "Well, this is all basically real, this is basically the main thrust of all human interactions in socially competitive environments.":::

No, it keeps getting bumped down my reading list because there aren't enough pictures, but I remembered the thread and really liked it. It reminded me of all the Churchill quotes where he's politely dressing someone down and extends it into how to profit from gentlemanly head-fuckery. All in jest, of course, but you see the pompous social positioning and competition in real life.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:13 PM (CJjw5)

70 This whole deal is just an excuse to get DirectTV Jeannie.

Posted by: LC LaWedgie at February 20, 2013 01:13 PM (bGlsD)

71 Punishing the hotel. Can't argue with that logic....

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:13 PM (uhftQ)

72
I'm too pragmatic to relate.



Posted by: soothsayer at February 20, 2013 01:13 PM (+oin+)

73 "But he's doing it because it's funny. Not because he really thinks he's getting some value out of wasting electricity.

....

you guys must have majored in Not Getting It.


Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:10 PM (LCRYB)"



So your friend actually does it because its funny. Intentionally driving up the cost of doing business is funny.


Got it.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 01:13 PM (yCvxi)

74 My all time favorite petty revenge was Larry David saying that when his divorce from Laurie David was final, he came home and turned on every light in the house because fuck the environment.
Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:11 PM (VtjlW)


True revenge would be standing on his rooftop spraying can after can of White Rain into the atmosphere. *nod*

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:13 PM (4df7R)

75 mccain sounded like an ass on the radio this morning.....the guy that he blew off yesterday called in and the senator tried to keep it together but "keith" showed him up again....

Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training at February 20, 2013 01:13 PM (GVxQo)

76 Global Warming is no laughing matter.

Posted by: Earnest Progressive goes to Camp at February 20, 2013 01:13 PM (I88Jc)

77 61
Was out fishing in Prince William Sound. Out in the middle of no where
we ran into a "pod"? of about 100 otters just floating on their backs,
sleeping, playing. Doing what otters do. It was pretty cool. Never seen
anything like that.

Posted by: Bosk at February 20, 2013 01:11 PM (n2K+4)

I just looked it up on Wiki, a group of otters is a romp. Good name.

Posted by: BatSpiderIronMan at February 20, 2013 01:13 PM (9ZAcB)

78 So when can we expect the first DVR Hoarding show on TLC

Posted by: Adam Smith's Invisible Pimp Hand at February 20, 2013 01:14 PM (NzBQO)

79 I think some people are only "conservatives" for the Judging and the Scolding aspects of it.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:14 PM (LCRYB)

80 Was out fishing in Prince William Sound. Out in the middle of no where we ran into a "pod"? of about 100 otters just floating on their backs, sleeping, playing. Doing what otters do. It was pretty cool. Never seen anything like that.
Posted by: Bosk at February 20, 2013 01:11 PM (n2K+4)



Kawaiiiiiii.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:14 PM (4df7R)

81 True revenge would be standing on his rooftop spraying can after can of White Rain into the atmosphere. *nod*

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:13 PM (4df7R)


ISWYDT
*head nod*

Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 01:15 PM (da5Wo)

82 Actually I'm changing my nic to "A Romp of Otters"

Posted by: A Romp of Otters at February 20, 2013 01:15 PM (9ZAcB)

83 you guys must have majored in Not Getting It.


Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:10 PM (LCRYB)


/taps the gauge...

Hmmm.... sarcometer seems to be out of calibration.....

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 20, 2013 01:15 PM (lZBBB)

84 I was at that aquarium in Vancouver 3 years ago. This video is so old that both of those otters are dead now.

(They feed the corpses to the killer whales)


Posted by: Captain Buzzkill


Urban myth. They feed them to the killer whales just before the otters look like they're about to die. (Or nap. Who can really say what's going on in there?) Killer whales won't eat a dead otter.

Posted by: Dang at February 20, 2013 01:15 PM (R18D0)

85 I just love staying in hotels where they're so concerned with Gaia's well-being they try to discourage you from getting fresh towels each day.

Fuck 'em. I want my fresh sheets and towels.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 20, 2013 01:15 PM (UOM48)

86 So when can we expect the first DVR Hoarding show on TLC

Posted by: Adam Smith's Invisible Pimp Hand at February 20, 2013 01:14 PM (NzBQO)


After Dr. Drew gets through with counseling them on their DVR hoarding ways. Given his track record, I expect all such sufferers to be dead by roughly 2017.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:15 PM (4df7R)

87 But we'll sit here all day and knock liberals for their supposedly pinch-faced scold attitude towards everyone, right? Constantly hectoring people about using plastic bags and such...?

Wow, what censorious twats THEY are...

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:16 PM (LCRYB)

88 Maybe people need a "mom" app for the DRV...that goes in every week and tosses out all the old shit strewn on the floor.

Posted by: @PurpAv at February 20, 2013 01:16 PM (/gHaE)

89 Pretty funny, ace.

Posted by: Eaton Cox at February 20, 2013 01:16 PM (q177U)

90 ISWYDT

*head nod*

Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 01:15 PM (da5Wo)



*hat tip*

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:16 PM (4df7R)

91 79 Ace,

Maybe...I've never gotten into the morality play much beyond "what works to keep society moving towards gain?"

I used to be a Republican b/c the donks were too soft on communism....

now I'm in the wilderness because the GOP is too soft on communist mules....

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:16 PM (LRFds)

92 jane d'oh

same.....i'm paying to stay there....if they are so concerned they should make it their policy and not give me the choice.....

Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training at February 20, 2013 01:16 PM (GVxQo)

93 When you stop and think about it -- about 20% of the space on your DVR is probably filled with commercials. If I had to pay another five bucks a month for one that skipped recording the same tired shit commercials, I'd gladly pay.

I'm getting pretty good at hitting the FF the required number of times, though.

Posted by: Regular Moron at February 20, 2013 01:16 PM (feFL6)

94 :::I think some people are only "conservatives" for the Judging and the Scolding aspects of it.
Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:14 PM (LCRYB):::

I don't know about that. I just dig bitches in sweater sets with pearls. HAWT.

Yeah, Junior Leaguers, that's my van parked outside your building.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:17 PM (CJjw5)

95 This video is so old that both of those otters are dead now.

(They feed the corpses to the killer whales)
Posted by: Captain Buzzkill


Award: Best Usage Of A Nic

Posted by: t-bird at February 20, 2013 01:17 PM (FcR7P)

96 My daugter filled up a VCR once, with a peanut butter sandwhich.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:17 PM (l86i3)

97
an otter is not a weasel

but a wolverine is??

Posted by: soothsayer at February 20, 2013 01:17 PM (KwX0v)

98 85 Jane D'oh,

Yup...

I stay at the La Quinta or Red roof most often in my trials,tri, ps, and tribulations....

you can definitely tell the true believer ecotard managers versus the businessmen.

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:17 PM (LRFds)

99 85
I just love staying in hotels where they're so concerned with Gaia's
well-being they try to discourage you from getting fresh towels each
day.

Fuck 'em. I want my fresh sheets and towels.


Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 20, 2013 01:15 PM (UOM4

I'm pretty sure they don't give a damn about the environment. It's just cost cutting like the grocery stores that "encourage" you to reuse plastic bags.

Posted by: A Romp of Otters at February 20, 2013 01:17 PM (9ZAcB)

100 Shall I unchain the Ravage?
Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 01:11 PM (da5Wo)



If you would.


I would like to point out that, as always, Dr. Sheldon Cooper has the best answer for this.


http://youtu.be/1MjcTVWDNR0

Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:18 PM (VtjlW)

101 "BatSpiderIronMan" No shit? That's a perfect discription.

Posted by: Bosk at February 20, 2013 01:18 PM (n2K+4)

102 Now I want an Otter Pop.

Posted by: Alexander the Grape at February 20, 2013 01:18 PM (oBJgT)

103 Exactly why I loathe Glenn Reynolds.



Indeed.

Posted by: Otter #1 at February 20, 2013 01:04 PM (r2PLg)

He has interesting thoughts on stuff like copyright and whatnot. Due Process stuff as well. He's an Evil Lawyer afterall.

Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 45% more DOOM! at February 20, 2013 01:18 PM (xAtAj)

104 an otter's gotta be a weasel.

it couldn't be anything else.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:18 PM (LCRYB)

105 "I just love staying in hotels where they're so concerned with Gaia's well-being they try to discourage you from getting fresh towels each day.


Fuck 'em. I want my fresh sheets and towels.


Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 20, 2013 01:15 PM (UOM4"



True, I'd just wish they were honest and said "Hey, we're trying to save money to keep your costs down."

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 01:18 PM (yCvxi)

106 Excuse me, I have to go throatpunch a hippie to feel better.
Posted by: alexthechick
***

I want slo mo video of that!!!

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:19 PM (uhftQ)

107 Glen is like Ace in that while pro-gay marriage and generally pro-choice, they don't shove it down their conservative readers' throats or belittle them.

Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 45% more DOOM! at February 20, 2013 01:19 PM (xAtAj)

108 I'm pretty sure they don't give a damn about the environment. It's just cost cutting like the grocery stores that "encourage" you to reuse plastic bags.
Posted by: A Romp of Otters at February 20, 2013 01:17 PM (9ZAcB)

Hot the room with a blue light once. The Cum stains will look like a Jackson Pollock Painting.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:19 PM (l86i3)

109
it's true, some of us suffer from Cliffclavinitis

Posted by: soothsayer at February 20, 2013 01:19 PM (KwX0v)

110 Constantly hectoring people about using plastic bags and such...?

You know who uses a shitload of plastic bags? Newspapers, because people don't want wet liberal news. Do you think newspapers use environmentally responsible inks that are plant based - like soybean? No way, they use petroleum based inks.

But they get a pass, because FYNQ.

Posted by: Regular Moron at February 20, 2013 01:19 PM (feFL6)

111 106
Excuse me, I have to go throatpunch a hippie to feel better.

Posted by: alexthechick

***



I want slo mo video of that!!!

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:19 PM (uhftQ)

I'd get mad that I couldn't help in the throat punching!

Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 45% more DOOM! at February 20, 2013 01:19 PM (xAtAj)

112 >>>I'm pretty sure they don't give a damn about the environment. It's just cost cutting like the grocery stores that "encourage" you to reuse plastic bags.

I love that scam. We're doing less work FOR THE ENVIRONMENT. I'd like to pull that. "For the environment, would you please select the option where I don't work for a couple of months but you keep coming back every day to keep my traffic up?"

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:20 PM (LCRYB)

113 about 20% of the space on your DVR is probably filled with commercials.

I sidebar'd a piece about how Dish is getting sued by advertisers over a commercial zapping DVR they plan to sell.

They not only want you to PAY to be annoyed, they want you to PAY for the disk space to store those annoyances.

Posted by: @PurpAv at February 20, 2013 01:20 PM (/gHaE)

114 Speaking of bullshit science from the sidebar;

>Even Moderate Drinking Linked to Increased Cancer Risk<

I don't believe it for a second. Sure drinking in excess will kill you or cause health problems. But moderate drinking? Bull.

I have a entire family who drank/drinks a glass of wine a day for years. Most of them far exceeded the normal human lifespan.

Posted by: Marcus at February 20, 2013 01:20 PM (GGCsk)

115 True, I'd just wish they were honest and said "Hey, we're trying to save money to keep your costs down."
Posted by: Burn the Witch
***

"So enjoy peeling the sheets apart...and that isn't a water stain on the ceiling."

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:21 PM (uhftQ)

116 Eight hundred thousand civvie jobs to be lost if sequestration, sez Obama defense dept.

Go for it, sez I.

Posted by: The littl shyning man at February 20, 2013 01:21 PM (ndp2I)

117 Ferrets are the meth heads of the Weasel family.

Otters are the dope smokers.

They're like the sexy girl that car manufacturers hire to show off the new car.

A real weasel is, well; a REAL WEASEL.

There's a reason why that's a pejorative.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 01:21 PM (qyv02)

118 104
an otter's gotta be a weasel.



it couldn't be anything else.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:18 PM (LCRYB)


Then is a weasel an otter?

Posted by: Tami at February 20, 2013 01:21 PM (X6akg)

119
you guys must have majored in Not Getting It.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:10 PM (LCRYB)








That's really hurtful, making cracks about my sex life. What did I ever do to you, you furry bastard?

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 20, 2013 01:21 PM (TIIx5)

120 True, I'd just wish they were honest and said

"our accountants think we can get away with nickle-and-diming you."

Posted by: t-bird at February 20, 2013 01:21 PM (FcR7P)

121 107 HoboJerky,

the GOP is not the caricature Joe Scardouche rails at on the Blinky Box...

hell I'm pro civil union....

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:21 PM (LRFds)

122 I can't believe there are people criticizing Ace for this post. This is a funny post, and I would enjoy even more like it.

So shut it, dummies!

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 01:21 PM (/AHDz)

123 The Georgia Aquarium has an Indonesian river otter exhibit. They are about the size of chihuahuas and so cute your rage meter will make you want to kill something.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 20, 2013 01:21 PM (UOM48)

124 >>>Glen is like Ace in that while pro-gay marriage and generally pro-choice

I'm not really pro-gay marriage (though that ship seems to have sailed).

I'm more anti- the anti-gay stuff.

And yes, I do believe it's part of the same I'm Better Than You thing that I keep talking about.

It's like people are clapping themselves on the back for being straight, like "We're living according to the Bible."

There is no virtue in avoiding a sin you were never tempted by in the first place.

It's not like straights are sitting here heroically resisting the urge for cock.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:22 PM (LCRYB)

125
that's how all that longbow shit started

Mr Technicality chimed in.

And then Professor History came along and piped in to correct Mr Technicality.

Me?

I'm of the Mr Whogivesashit clan, myself.

Posted by: soothsayer at February 20, 2013 01:22 PM (NLH1M)

126 Yer DVR should have a dvd burner built in or the DVR should be networked. The one I bought from Walmar too many years ago didn't have ethernet, or usb, and the DVD burner died.

Doesn't matter anymore 'cuz don't have TV/Cable/Satellite anymore. Anything I want to watch I get on DVD from amazon. Keep those gold box deals coming.


Posted by: Skandia Recluse at February 20, 2013 01:22 PM (C5Ibv)

127 :::"I just love staying in hotels where they're so concerned with Gaia's well-being they try to discourage you from getting fresh towels each day. Fuck 'em. I want my fresh sheets and towels. :::

I floss myself, IYKWIM, with the towel after I'm dry so they don't try sneaking it back on the rack. I'll know.

And as far as keeping my costs down - I don't care. I am willing to pay whatever it costs for clean towels every day. And sheets, if the hotel has Spanktravision and I'm traveling alone.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:22 PM (CJjw5)

128 Four legs, furry = weasel.

Posted by: @PurpAv at February 20, 2013 01:22 PM (/gHaE)

129 "But we'll sit here all day and knock liberals for their supposedly pinch-faced scold attitude towards everyone, right? Constantly hectoring people about using plastic bags and such...?


Wow, what censorious twats THEY are...
Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:16 PM (LCRYB)"



Get over it ace. A couple of people don't agree with you about a joke and have given reasons why. ZOMGZ!! So "censorious"!!!


I happen to think the attitude of intentionally driving up the cost of doing business is bad and quite leftist. You just think it's funny. Fine. We agree to disagree.


I'm sure you'll find a way to go on because a couple of people didn't find something you said funny one time.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 01:22 PM (yCvxi)

130
>>Then is a weasel an otter?<<

MARTEN!

Posted by: garrett at February 20, 2013 01:22 PM (N04vL)

131 Hot the room with a blue light once. The Cum stains will look like a Jackson Pollock Painting.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy
Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:19 PM (l86i3)

Uh, Hell No! Why would you want to know? I just pretend that I'm the first person to ever stay in that room, it's got a new mattress, carpet and bedding.

Posted by: A Romp of Otters at February 20, 2013 01:23 PM (9ZAcB)

132 I donno what it is about otters that makes me want to pick up a club and paint the walls red...............

Posted by: maddogg at February 20, 2013 01:23 PM (OlN4e)

133 I just noticed the otter video. That's the cutest little Bubsy Berkeley scene.

Posted by: Shoot Me at February 20, 2013 01:23 PM (qiXMt)

134 He has interesting thoughts on stuff like copyright and whatnot. Due Process stuff as well. He's an Evil Lawyer afterall.
Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 45% more DOOM! at February 20, 2013 01:18 PM (xAtAj)

______________

I just --well he never links to the best bloggers.

And--then he has a special talent for linking supposedly Conservatish female bloggers--who talked themselves into voting for Obama--while their specialty was supposedly economics.

Posted by: Otter #1 at February 20, 2013 01:23 PM (r2PLg)

135 That's right we're holding hands, eat it up stupid humans! Your day will come!!

Posted by: Otters of the Allied Atheist Alliance at February 20, 2013 01:23 PM (NzBQO)

136 For awhile there I had entire seasons of shows just sitting there on my DVR waiting for the day I might have time to watch, even though I knew damn well that day will never come.

Unfortunately, now I'm recording HD shows, and they take up almost four times as much space, so those days are over, and I'm beside myself over it. My DVR only has a 250 Gig hard drive.

I'm dying over here now.

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 01:23 PM (/AHDz)

137 http://harebrained-schemes.com/shadowrun/what-is-shadowrun-returns/

Shadowrun is coming cummers....

Ace I may sponsor a 4 closed beta key buy for the Horde if you're interested....

4 beta keys and 4 digital downloads for the campaign server cost 66 bucks....

I'm game if you can think of a contest to run for them

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:23 PM (LRFds)

138 LOL, otters are in the same family as weasels and guess what else ................................... the I don't give a shit Honey Badger

Posted by: Vic at February 20, 2013 01:23 PM (53z96)

139
Rape dolphins use otters as Fleshlights, when comely female dolphins aren't available.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 20, 2013 01:24 PM (TIIx5)

140
>>>Then is a weasel an otter?

It would rather neatly complete the circle, wouldn't it.

Posted by: soothsayer at February 20, 2013 01:24 PM (KwX0v)

141 I think some people are only "conservatives" for the Judging and the Scolding aspects of it.

It's waaaay easier to do that as a lefty. Environmentalism alone lets you look down on everyone else for the rest of your life.

Posted by: Ian S. at February 20, 2013 01:24 PM (B/VB5)

142
I love that scam. We're doing less work FOR THE ENVIRONMENT. I'd like to pull that. "For the environment, would you please select the option where I don't work for a couple of months but you keep coming back every day to keep my traffic up?"

Heh, just for shits and giggles, I check my hits occasionally over at my little defunct blog. I get almost as many hits now as I did when I posted every day.

I call them "accidental" hits.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit. at February 20, 2013 01:24 PM (+z4pE)

143
And now for a meaningless anecdote....

In a lot of the nicer hotels in Europe and elsewhere (like in China last fall), the rooms have a place to put your magnetic key card to enable power to the outlets. Otherwise, no power to lights, etc. So when you are in your room, you have to put your key card in an enabling gizmo on the wall, to get anything to work.
I ran into this in 2001 in a really nice resort in Italy, and it was a WTF moment, but since, I see the game that is being played.

I don't think I have ever seen that in a hotel in the US or Canukistan.

Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes.... at February 20, 2013 01:24 PM (RFeQD)

144 134 Otter#1,

we're discussing Chris Christy's internet nom'd'plume AllahPundit?

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:24 PM (LRFds)

145 LOL, otters are in the same family as weasels and guess what else ................................... the I don't give a shit Honey Badger
Posted by: Vic at February 20, 2013 01:23 PM (53z96)

That splains a lot.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:24 PM (l86i3)

146 eoj

i need a list of hotels you stay at so i never ever stay at the same one......ewwwww...just ewwww

Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training at February 20, 2013 01:24 PM (GVxQo)

147 >>>I happen to think the attitude of intentionally driving up the cost of doing business is bad and quite leftist. You just think it's funny. Fine. We agree to disagree.

I happen to think fagging out on someone in order to once again satisfy your base and juvenile impulse to Scorn (thus putting you, by necessity, above me, in a stupid fucking point-scoring match) is quite leftist.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:24 PM (LCRYB)

148 I'm not sure what it says about me that my main response to ace's post over at that place where he's cheating on us is "Wait, there's Novas on lemurs? Gimme gimme gimme gimme!"


I'm going with awesome. It says I'm awesome.


Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:25 PM (VtjlW)

149 Otters are nothing. Dolphins, those are some world class assholes:

http://tinyurl.com/bdb7s6f

Posted by: Brother Cavil and his Ampersandsaurus at February 20, 2013 01:25 PM (GBXon)

150 I'd get mad that I couldn't help in the throat punching!
Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 45% more DOOM!
***

I was at a coworker's desk and they had old pics of their family. THEY WERE ALL HIPPIES! Tie died shirts, long hair, sandals, and the men had scraggly beards.
I would have clubbed them like baby seals.

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:25 PM (uhftQ)

151 think about it.

I thought about it. Still doesn't make any sense. Your hotel bill will be exactly the same but you'll be up all night with all those lights on.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 20, 2013 01:25 PM (7ObY1)

152 Flying squid vs. sea otter?

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 20, 2013 01:25 PM (UOM48)

153 I go to a store and replace whatever shit I took out of the hotel mini-bar. Saving money is more personally useful than wasting someone else's, but you still get to feel like you're putting one over on them.

Posted by: Zippity Doo Dah at February 20, 2013 01:25 PM (E55AK)

154 It's not like straights are sitting here heroically resisting the urge for cock.

That line's a fuckin KEEPER.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:25 PM (CJjw5)

155 Excuse me, I have to go throatpunch a hippie to feel better.

How can anyone not love this woman?

Posted by: Blanco Basura at February 20, 2013 01:25 PM (YEelc)

156 Yeah, laying at some elevated position with a beer and a 25X scope mounted on a bull barrel 220 Swift loaded with Sierra varmint bullets and two queer otters at 200 yards............what could possibly happen?

Posted by: maddogg at February 20, 2013 01:25 PM (OlN4e)

157 ah NM Grin Reynolds...

yeah his legal theorizing is funny stuff and about to be rendered as useless as my history scholarship.

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:26 PM (LRFds)

158 "It's not like straights are sitting here heroically resisting the urge for cock."
===============

Speak for yourself, Ace. Some days, it's all I can do.

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 01:26 PM (/AHDz)

159
Weasle.... the "otter" dark meat.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 20, 2013 01:26 PM (nELVU)

160 And now for a meaningless anecdote....In a lot of the nicer hotels in Europe and elsewhere (like in China last fall), the rooms have a place to put your magnetic key card to enable power to the outlets. Otherwise, no power to lights, etc. So when you are in your room, you have to put your key card in an enabling gizmo on the wall, to get anything to work.I ran into this in 2001 in a really nice resort in Italy, and it was a WTF moment, but since, I see the game that is being played.I don't think I have ever seen that in a hotel in the US or Canukistan.
Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes.... at February 20, 2013 01:24 PM (RFeQD)

I was trippin when I saw that in China

Posted by: The Jackhole at February 20, 2013 01:26 PM (nTgAI)

161 Leave your fish on a stringer off the dock overnight. Fish heads on clips are really cute.

Posted by: DaveA at February 20, 2013 01:26 PM (6YLIm)

162 107 Glen is like Ace in that while pro-gay marriage and generally pro-choice, they don't shove it down their conservative readers' throats or belittle them.
Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 45% more DOOM! at February 20, 2013 01:19 PM (xAtAj)

_____________

Glenn gives you very little thought process--and he just does those one liner links to other people's work.

Listen he created a good gig for himself--but it's annoying.

Posted by: Otter #1 at February 20, 2013 01:27 PM (r2PLg)

163 "And sheets, if the hotel has Spanktravision and I'm traveling alone.


Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:22 PM (CJjw5)"



Only if it's the Spanktravision that has the preview function.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 01:27 PM (yCvxi)

164 Burn the Witch,

Let me ask you a question. What enormous accomplishments have you achieved which justify your self-appointed position to Correct others?

Because I have a sneaky little theory: I am guessing you don't have any.

In fact, I would take this further: I would guess your burning need to Scold is driven precisely by your lack of accomplishments. Your Scolding and Hectoring act is how you feel you provide value.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:27 PM (LCRYB)

165 "There is no virtue in avoiding a sin you were never tempted by in the first place."



Wait....it IS a sin?

Posted by: Tami at February 20, 2013 01:27 PM (X6akg)

166 LOL, otters are in the same family as weasels and guess what else ................................... the I don't give a shit Honey Badger Posted by: Vic at February 20, 2013 01:23 PM (53z96) That splains a lot.
Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:24 PM (l86i3)

The largest member of the weasel family... WOLVERINES !

Posted by: The Jackhole at February 20, 2013 01:28 PM (nTgAI)

167 158 Kensington,

well the allure of the hairy rectal cavity....

I mean I understand lesbians....I am not attracted to the male form either...

Bisexuals..."eh" they like their boats a floating but gay dudes....?

It's a big country room enough for everyone I guess.

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:28 PM (LRFds)

168 ace, if you're still here, I just received this from The Blaze. Columbine survivor pens open letter to Obama, "Whose Side Are You On?" re gun rights.


http://tinyurl.com/abzjj2c

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 20, 2013 01:29 PM (UOM48)

169 Let me ask you a question. What enormous accomplishments have you achieved which justify your self-appointed position to Correct others?

The fact that Ace is scolding and hectoring others for scolding and hectoring others is about to implode the universe with one of those Higgs thingies. Run!

Posted by: Ian S. at February 20, 2013 01:29 PM (B/VB5)

170 The largest member of the weasel family... WOLVERINES !
Posted by: The Jackhole at February 20, 2013 01:28 PM (nTgAI)


So, maybe AoS shouldn't have a mascot but a representative family genus.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:29 PM (l86i3)

171 This is no different than if I made a joke about women needing to shut their pie-holes and then a bunch of censorious scold feminists came in to tell me my joke was "degrading society" by "making such attitudes more acceptable."

Same fucking bullshit, same reasons for it, too. Presuming to correct others gives one a tiny thrill of "accomplishment" and self-validation.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:29 PM (LCRYB)

172 Uh..... is someone Socking ACE? These responses are not in his normal 'style'....

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 20, 2013 01:29 PM (lZBBB)

173 The BFF asked her if she'd ever seen how the
otters hold hands when sleeping so as not to drift off and the nurse
said yes. The BFF waved at me and said "She's my otter".
Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:08 PM (VtjlW)

Yes, after my husband died, for the first two nights after she got there, my Mom slept on his side of the bed holding my hand till I could fall asleep. My Dad had passed away almost 4 years to the day earlier. I remember thinking, "My Mom and I are both widows now. I hope I can handle it with the same grace she has."

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Wily Wrepublican Wench at February 20, 2013 01:29 PM (kXoT0)

174 "Wait....it IS a sin?"
===============

Yeah, I really don't want you to do that.

Posted by: God at February 20, 2013 01:30 PM (/AHDz)

175 So when it's time to cull programs from the DVR how do you decide what stays and what goes? I mean RuPaul Drag Race or Buckwild? Who could make that call?


It's why I love the internet. No TV bill, no DVR, no having to cull The Real Housewife Bitches of Wherever. I use my tv sites and watch what I want whenever...no commercials.

Posted by: DangerGirl - Stop this thing, I want off at February 20, 2013 01:30 PM (XboQD)

176 It's not like straights are sitting here heroically resisting the urge for cock.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:22 PM (LCRYB)

Speak for yourself!

Posted by: kathysaysso at February 20, 2013 01:30 PM (6H6o8)

177 eoj i need a list of hotels you stay at so i never ever stay at the same one......ewwwww...just ewwww

Kitten, I used to work in hotel management. Nice hotels. Expensive hotels. The water they use for laundry is heated to about 190 degrees. Nothing's coming back from that.

However.

Want to know how many times they empty and scrub the hot tub? I'll give you a hint. It's less than one. Something to think about when you're soaking in that petri dish with the sperm and ginch mist all up in your sinuses.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:30 PM (CJjw5)

178 ian

how far do i actually have to run? it's cold and raining outside.....

Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training at February 20, 2013 01:30 PM (GVxQo)

179 The Georgia Aquarium has an Indonesian river otter exhibit. They are about the size of chihuahuas and so cute your rage meter will make you want to kill something.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 20, 2013 01:21 PM (UOM4



You realize I now feel compelled to go look for video of them, right?

Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:31 PM (VtjlW)

180 I mean, we can never say something dark, or funny, or ironic, or whatever.

We must constantly repeat Pro-Social Messages whose Literal Truth is Unmistakable in Support of Our Ideology.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:31 PM (LCRYB)

181 And yes, I do believe it's part of the same I'm Better Than You thing that I keep talking about. It's like people are clapping themselves on the back for being straight, like "We're living according to the Bible." There is no virtue in avoiding a sin you were never tempted by in the first place. <<This. I have long thought the biggest problem with our current culture is too many of us are driven by envy or hubris. Why are we so freakin' insecure?

Posted by: Liberty Lover at February 20, 2013 01:31 PM (encrR)

182 I love that scam. We're doing less work FOR THE
ENVIRONMENT. I'd like to pull that. "For the environment, would you
please select the option where I don't work for a couple of months but
you keep coming back every day to keep my traffic up?"

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:20 PM (LCRYB)


*confused*

I thought that's what we're already doing......

Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 01:31 PM (da5Wo)

183 173 Sherry McEvil,

There's something beautiful in the person who was so committed they choose to walk through the world as a widow or widower.

My grandmothers both handled the status with grace.

I'm sorry for your loss love is eternal.

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:32 PM (LRFds)

184 kitten....he called me kitten!!!!! <3

Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training at February 20, 2013 01:32 PM (GVxQo)

185 Its all Rove's fault dammit.

Posted by: Vic at February 20, 2013 01:32 PM (53z96)

186 Kitten, I used to work in hotel management. Nice hotels. Expensive hotels.

Good lord, forget actual TV, we need someone to make episodes of "EoJ: Hotel Manager" immediately.

Posted by: Ian S. at February 20, 2013 01:32 PM (B/VB5)

187 I am working on my new painting-Otters playing poker.

Posted by: Fourth Virginia at February 20, 2013 01:32 PM (wbmaj)

188 "I happen to think fagging out on someone in order to once again satisfy your base and juvenile impulse to Scorn (thus putting you, by necessity, above me, in a stupid fucking point-scoring match) is quite leftist.


Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:24 PM (LCRYB)"



Now I'm "fagging out" on you? WTF does even mean? I didn't think something you said was funny. I explained why. You seemed to think it pertinent to hector me about my so-called lack of a sense of humor, but I'm the one who's violated your current little internet pet peeve.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 01:32 PM (yCvxi)

189
Want to know how many times they empty and scrub the hot tub? I'll give you a hint. It's less than one. Something to think about when you're soaking in that petri dish with the sperm and ginch mist all up in your sinuses.
Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:30 PM (CJjw5)


Well thanks for that. I just booked a hotel for an outage for a month. Made sure it had a pool and hot tub. It don't matter now. Being the meat in Cum stew is not in my future.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:32 PM (l86i3)

190 Burn the Witch,

Let me ask you a question. What enormous accomplishments have you achieved which justify your self-appointed position to Correct others?

...

Posted by: ace


Drawn into the ruse, Ace does not see what card Burn is about to play.

"Got 'cha! I was joking!"

Posted by: weft cut-loop at February 20, 2013 01:32 PM (Ipj15)

191 :::Your Scolding and Hectoring act is how you feel you provide value.:::

I used to, but converted over to a Dick Joke act around 2006. Value, however, is determined by the consumer.

Consume me.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:33 PM (CJjw5)

192 Yes, after my husband died, for the first two nights after she got there, my Mom slept on his side of the bed holding my hand till I could fall asleep. My Dad had passed away almost 4 years to the day earlier. I remember thinking, "My Mom and I are both widows now. I hope I can handle it with the same grace she has."

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Wily Wrepublican Wench at February 20, 2013 01:29 PM (kXoT0)



God bless you both.

Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:33 PM (VtjlW)

193
and then we have our share of Mr Spocks

"That is illogical."

and that's why Bones and Kirk laugh at Mr Spock at the end of the show and then bang the stuffing outta Nurse Chapel and Ensign Whatsherface

Posted by: soothsayer at February 20, 2013 01:33 PM (vanqS)

194 I don't think I have ever seen that in a hotel in the US or Canukistan.

I remember staying at a hotel on St Thomas that turned the A/C off on it's guests in the middle of the night. Major chain -- and I don't want to say the name * cough HI cough* (Though they didn't call themselves that - they had a fancier name) . I woke up at 3am bathed in sweat and called the front desk. They said that is their 'policy'. I then asked them how much more I'd have to pay to get A/C all night long. It wasn't an option. Told them it was going to be my policy to spend the rest of my life bad-mouthing them.

The next day I looked carefully and you could see condensation dripping all down the walls, due to no A/C and warm moist tropical air. Save a penny, spend a pound -- or something like that.

Posted by: Regular Moron at February 20, 2013 01:33 PM (feFL6)

195 177 Empire of Jeff,

indeed....one of the nicest things I did in the early courtship phase of spouse was insist on cleaning their hot tub if acrobatic aquatic monkey sex broke out....

no need to spread the joy so to speak.

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:34 PM (LRFds)

196 Otters are nothing. Dolphins, those are some world class assholes:



Dolphin rapists? Isn't it hard to vomit underwater?

Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 01:34 PM (GQ8sn)

197 with the sperm and ginch mist all up in your sinuses.

Plus, they MAY change the sheets every customer but they don't change the blankets or the bed cover.

And that glass in the bathroom with the hygenic wrapper around it?

The maids have replacement wrappers. Rinse and wrap and done.

Bon Apetit!

Oh and don't ask about mattress turning or replacement schedules.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 01:34 PM (qyv02)

198 I just love staying in hotels where they're so concerned with Gaia's well-being they try to discourage you from getting fresh towels each day.


I love that. When you have to ask them to change the bedding for you. And they wonder why they get bed bug infestations.

Answer: less frequent bedding changes and shitty detergent.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:34 PM (4df7R)

199 >>Wait....it IS a sin?

SIGH. This place can be so cock-centric at times.

Posted by: Mama AJ, Assault Poiser, Nerf Sniper at February 20, 2013 01:35 PM (SUKHu)

200 Yes, after my husband died, for the first two nights after she got there, my Mom slept on his side of the bed holding my hand till I could fall asleep. My Dad had passed away almost 4 years to the day earlier. I remember thinking, "My Mom and I are both widows now. I hope I can handle it with the same grace she has."

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Wily Wrepublican Wench at February 20, 2013 01:29 PM (kXoT0)


Wow, that's real hard stuff. God bless you.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:35 PM (l86i3)

201 186 Ian S,

"someone bled out on the matress? Flip it the fuck over we got bill to pay okay.....


//EoJ Hotel Hellion

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:35 PM (LRFds)

202 Because 'otter' sounds so much better than 'water rat.'

Posted by: zsasz at February 20, 2013 01:35 PM (MMC8r)

203 Answer: less frequent bedding changes and shitty detergent.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:34 PM (4df7R)

Actually the bed bug epidemic has been caused by the EPA, which can be traced back to Tricky Dicky.

Posted by: Vic at February 20, 2013 01:35 PM (53z96)

204
Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:08 PM (VtjlW)
Well thanks AtC, you just accidentally made ME tear up at my desk! Thank you for sharing that though. *passes around tissues*

Posted by: LizLem at February 20, 2013 01:36 PM (8wqqE)

205 196 Otters are nothing. Dolphins, those are some world class assholes:



Dolphin rapists? Isn't it hard to vomit underwater?

Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 01:34 PM (GQ8sn)

____________

Dolphins are the gang banging whores of the sea.

At least we hold your hand first.

Posted by: Otter #1 at February 20, 2013 01:36 PM (r2PLg)

206
//EoJ Hotel Hellion
Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:35 PM (LRFds)


No Doubt that would be Pay Per View on the Hustler Channel.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:36 PM (l86i3)

207 182 BC1981,

yeah I call that "the great Romney clusterfuck of 2012"

I am slowly getting back on the horse from that mess Ace....sorry I weas down to less than 650 posts.

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:37 PM (LRFds)

208 Burn the Witch,

Let me ask you a question. What enormous accomplishments have you achieved which justify your self-appointed position to Correct others?

Because I have a sneaky little theory: I am guessing you don't have any.


In fact, I would take this further: I would guess your burning need to Scold is driven precisely by your lack of accomplishments. Your Scolding and Hectoring act is how you feel you provide value.


Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:27 PM (LCRYB)


Wow, you really don't take it well when someone doesn't find one of your jokes funny do you? So much so that you feel a seething desire to attempt to insult me personally. Before I engage in your little internet e-peen contest, would you like to re-examine your current little internet pet project to clean up the internet and apply it to yourself?


Or did you want to go full bore with your little pseudo-psychology thought experiment in a comments section?

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 01:37 PM (yCvxi)

209 how far do i actually have to run? it's cold and raining outside.....
Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training
***

Screw it. I'd rather die warm and dry. A coworker just told me it's snowing at her house. Glad I don't live in that part of AZ.

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:37 PM (uhftQ)

210 BTW, otters taste like chicken. Just wanted to share.

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:38 PM (uhftQ)

211 Oh and btw Ace, you have some 'splainin to do.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/ tvshowbiz/article-2281743/ Jessica-Simpson-plans-new-baby-Ace.html

Posted by: LizLem at February 20, 2013 01:38 PM (8wqqE)

212 The thing is, if I weren't a DVR hoarder, I'd miss out on lots of great discoveries. I recorded "Hatfields McCoys" off the History Channel last May but only got around to watching it a few weeks ago, AND IT WAS AMAZING! Six solid hours of Kevin Costner and Bill Paxton refusing to let anything go and spitting and shooting each other.

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 01:39 PM (/AHDz)

213 [Hot the room with a blue light once. The Cum stains will look like a Jackson Pollock Painting.
Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:19 PM (l86i3)


This is why, when I'm forced to sleep in a hotel, I sleep on top of the blankets, fully clothed, using my coat as a blanket and with a sheet of paper towel between me and the pillow.

*SHUDDER*

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:39 PM (4df7R)

214 I remember staying at a hotel on St Thomas that turned the A/C off on
it's guests in the middle of the night. Major chain -- and I don't want
to say the name * cough HI cough* (Though they didn't call themselves
that - they had a fancier name) . Posted by: Regular Moron at February 20, 2013 01:33 PM (feFL6)

I had that happen in a "Comfort" Inn and Suites in Hot Springs, Arkansas in August. The A/C was hooked to a motion detector, when you are asleep, you don't deserve A/C. They will come and switch off the motion detector thing, but, then, the A/C blasts wide open so you freeze.

Posted by: Sherry McEvil, Wily Wrepublican Wench at February 20, 2013 01:40 PM (kXoT0)

215 "You tell that persnickety feminazi bitch that pubic hair in the bathtub is NORMAL."

//EoJ Hotel Hellion

Posted by: kathysaysso at February 20, 2013 01:40 PM (6H6o8)

216 This. I have long thought the biggest problem with our current culture is too many of us are driven by envy or hubris. Why are we so freakin' insecure?
Posted by: Liberty Lover at February 20, 2013 01:31 PM (encrR)


fear of the unknown, I guess
fear is always at the root

Posted by: beach at February 20, 2013 01:41 PM (LpQbZ)

217 210
BTW, otters taste like chicken. Just wanted to share.

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:38 PM (uhftQ)


Will you people just eat chicken for God's sake.

Posted by: Tami at February 20, 2013 01:41 PM (X6akg)

218 @211: I guess the pancakes thing works!

Posted by: Ian S. at February 20, 2013 01:41 PM (B/VB5)

219 We'll leave the light on for ya.

Posted by: Fourth Virginia at February 20, 2013 01:41 PM (wbmaj)

220 This is why, when I'm forced to sleep in a hotel, I sleep on top of the
blankets, fully clothed, using my coat as a blanket and with a sheet of
paper towel between me and the pillow.



Awww....you're no fun! No fun at all!!!

Posted by: Hidden wireless camera fanbois at February 20, 2013 01:41 PM (GQ8sn)

221 Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:30 PM (CJjw5)

You should try Hedonism II in Negril. They drain and clean the hot tubs and pools every night.

Posted by: Country Singer at February 20, 2013 01:41 PM (L8r/r)

222 Well honey, if you wouldn't masterbate in the shower, there wouldn't be any videos of it on the net now would there?

//EoJ Hotel Hellion

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:42 PM (l86i3)

223 Will you people just eat chicken for God's sake.


Posted by: Tami at February 20, 2013 01:41 PM (X6akg)


Have to stop fucking it first.

Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 01:42 PM (da5Wo)

224
This is why, when I'm forced to sleep in a hotel, I sleep on top of the blankets, fully clothed, using my coat as a blanket and with a sheet of paper towel between me and the pillow.

I just hang myself up in the closet.

Posted by: David Carradine at February 20, 2013 01:42 PM (MMC8r)

225 215 kathysayss,

Of course there's just a third of a roll of toilet paper in your room, you think that shit grows on trees?

//EoJ Hotel Hellion

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:42 PM (LRFds)

226 Will you people just eat chicken for God's sake.
Posted by: Tami at February 20, 2013 01:41 PM (X6akg)


I sometimes wonder if people who eat exotic meats on a regular basis, when faced with eating a simple chicken leg, find themselves thinking, "Hmm... I don't know if this tastes more like kangaroo or gila monster..."

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:42 PM (4df7R)

227 I new a leopard who once ate a human. It was heard to say that the guy tasted just like chicken.

Posted by: Fourth Virginia at February 20, 2013 01:42 PM (wbmaj)

228 >>>Wow, you really don't take it well when someone doesn't find one of your jokes funny do you?

You found it unfunny in the same way an environmental goon wouldn't find it funny -- "Wow man, nice joke, encouraging WASTE in society and producing results which are suboptimal for mankind."

And you got quite the little thrill in doing so.

It's fun to Judge, isn't it? It's fun to Scold, right?

There is simply no difference between the two -- an objection from environmental nuts and your objection from the "We Must Dedicate Ourselves to Supporting Business" objection.

No one's allowed to joke when the Moral Scolds are out.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:42 PM (LCRYB)

229 Tenderizing that chicken.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 01:42 PM (qyv02)

230 Takes a tender commenter.

Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 45% more DOOM! at February 20, 2013 01:43 PM (xAtAj)

231 And, Burn the Witch, you suck on so many levels in this thread it's hard to total them all up.

I doubt anyone gives a rat's ass that you don't think the joke is funny. It's that you come off as a tiresome, humorless scold in expressing that, and a reminder that there's no shortage of douchebags to be found even amongst those with whom one shares some political opinions.

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 01:43 PM (/AHDz)

232 You should try Hedonism II in Negril. They drain and clean the hot tubs and pools every night.


There's a reason they do that. Every other night is poolside blowjob contest night.

You know what the locals call Hedo? "The Farm".

Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 01:43 PM (GQ8sn)

233 You have to wonder what neat biohazard zones the Japanese Coffin Hotels are really....

I mean even without their drive to screw calculators and all...

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:43 PM (LRFds)

234 I just hang myself up in the closet.
Posted by: David Carradine at February 20, 2013 01:42 PM (MMC8r)


I laughed. A lot.

Is this a case of near-literal gallows humor?

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:43 PM (4df7R)

235
Will you people just eat chicken for God's sake.

Thanks. Thanks a lot.

Posted by: The Chicken at February 20, 2013 01:44 PM (+z4pE)

236 Do any of you other folks watch programs from other countries? Or am I the only American viewer of MasterChef South Africa out there? *blushes*

I'm always looking for recommendations for new shows to watch.

Posted by: DangerGirl - Stop this thing, I want off at February 20, 2013 01:44 PM (6egmO)

237 234 MWR,

that would be "field expedient gallows humor of love" my friend....of love

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (LRFds)

238 Okay am I beyond baseline nuts for beginning to believe that I should get gas every night on the way home from work? Leaving aside that up 50 cents in seven weeks thing, gas went up 7 cents overnight last night. The hell!

Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (VtjlW)

239 "Well how the hell was I to know that all my housekeepers are illegal aliens? I can't understand a word they say!"

//EoJ Hotel Hellion


Posted by: kathysaysso at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (6H6o8)

240 #236 I watched a talk show from Detroit once. I couldn't understand it.

Posted by: Fourth Virginia at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (wbmaj)

241 Alright, that's it. I'm passing around the hat and everybody better throw in. We're getting Ace a hooker. And a good one, not that shit EoJ uses. That means I need at least a five from everyone.

Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (da5Wo)

242 "This is why, when I'm forced to sleep in a hotel, I sleep on top of the
blankets, fully clothed, using my coat as a blanket and with a sheet of
paper towel between me and the pillow."

===============

You think a sheet of paper towel is going to keep us apart? That's adorable.

Posted by: The Cum at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (/AHDz)

243 This is why, when I'm forced to sleep in a hotel, I sleep on top of the blankets, fully clothed, using my coat as a blanket and with a sheet of paper towel between me and the pillow.

You know what's worse then hotels? The accommodations on yachts. That's why I wash ashore.

Posted by: Natalie Wood at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (feFL6)

244 Planning a trip to Okinawa in a few months. All this gross hotel talk is putting me off.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (UOM48)

245 So. "Burn the Witch" isn't a snarky take on the mob mentality, it's a prescription?

You should've been born 400 years ago.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (qyv02)

246 @ Burn The Witch,

I think he's more frustrated that he threw out a (pretty obvious) light, throwaway joke to put up a post instead of just posting Open Thread, and now it's turned into "You're such a scumbag Free Shitter for joking about raising the cost of business."

Joking about raising the cost of business? Is there such a category? And is it so large that there is a movement to combat it?

Ever tell a joke that someone doesn't get? Or that doesn't even get that it IS a joke? And then have to spend ten minutes explaining it, only to hear, "Well... you shouldn't joke about things like that."

I don't know about you, but that pushes my FUCK OFF button. Yes, Ace needs to let shit roll off his back easier sometimes, but damn, dude. Lighten up.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (CJjw5)

247 235 The Chicken,

dude you're safe....God knows after 2011 and Obama's joy with you I am not that hungry

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (LRFds)

248 Do any of you other folks watch programs from other countries? Or am I the only American viewer of MasterChef South Africa out there? *blushes*

Well I don't watch South African shows, but my television intake at this point consists of about 80% Japanese TV with a sprinkling of Korean. I don't know what they're saying 90% of the time, but it's fun!

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (4df7R)

249 Will you people just eat chicken for God's sake.
Posted by: Tami
***

I'm a killer whale. I'm supposed to eat otters. Jeeez.

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:46 PM (uhftQ)

250 There's a reason they do that. Every other night is poolside blowjob contest night.

You know what the locals call Hedo? "The Farm Zoo".


Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 01:43 PM (GQ8sn)
FIFY. Yep, I know perfectly well. And I love the place.

Posted by: Country Singer at February 20, 2013 01:46 PM (L8r/r)

251 Eat more otter.

Posted by: Fourth Virginia at February 20, 2013 01:46 PM (wbmaj)

252
kensington, there's no need to pile on and insult Burn the Witch


You Kiss Ass.

Posted by: soothsayer at February 20, 2013 01:46 PM (1WM2H)

253 238 AlexTheChick,

Ma'am this is a voluntary cost hike too....

"Keystone XL? Never heard of it...."

//Chaz Gibby

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:47 PM (LRFds)

254 "Okay am I beyond baseline nuts for beginning to believe that I should get gas every night on the way home from work?"
===============

No! It's a fine strategy, and I often do that. Psychologically, it's just easier to take a $10 hit every day then it is to take a $50 hit every five days.

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 01:47 PM (/AHDz)

255 Alright, that's it. I'm passing around the hat and everybody better throw in. We're getting Ace a hooker. And a good one, not that shit EoJ uses. That means I need at least a five from everyone.
Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (da5Wo)


Really? A whole five? Can we haggle the price down a little?

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:47 PM (4df7R)

256 "Why did the chicken cross the road" is not a joke about road safety.

Posted by: zsasz at February 20, 2013 01:47 PM (MMC8r)

257 Alright, that's it. I'm passing around the hat and everybody better
throw in. We're getting Ace a hooker. And a good one, not that shit EoJ
uses. That means I need at least a five from everyone.



I know a good one.

Posted by: 16 year old boy at February 20, 2013 01:47 PM (GQ8sn)

258 Do any of you other folks watch programs from other countries? Or am I the only American viewer of MasterChef South Africa out there? *blushes*

Isn't the point of YouTube pretty much "weird shit from other countries"? I mean, try to imagine any kind of record company attempt to make Gangnam Style happen in the 80s.

And of course the patron channel of AoSHQ is BBC America.

Posted by: Ian S. at February 20, 2013 01:47 PM (B/VB5)

259 You can go piss off, too, then soothsayer.

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 01:48 PM (/AHDz)

260 Alright, that's it. I'm passing around the hat and everybody better throw in. We're getting Ace a hooker.

Fine, but I'm not helping with the cleanup until I get comped on the quicklime from the last one.

Posted by: Brother Cavil and his Ampersandsaurus at February 20, 2013 01:48 PM (GBXon)

261 can't we all get along.....i haven't seen a troll on this thread we should be all happy and stuff......you are bumming me out....

Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training at February 20, 2013 01:48 PM (GVxQo)

262 238
Okay am I beyond baseline nuts for beginning to believe that I should
get gas every night on the way home from work? Leaving aside that up
50 cents in seven weeks thing, gas went up 7 cents overnight last night.
The hell!

Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (VtjlW


I just remembered my car is down to fumes. Too lazy to drive off the island to the nearest Kroger gas station. However, I'm getting up my nerve. Hope I can trust the "range" thingy on my car. Worth it to get $.40 off/gal.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 20, 2013 01:48 PM (UOM48)

263 TANSTAAFL.... There Aint NO Such Thing as a Free Lunch...

By burning all the electricty, the power costs of the Hotel Rise, so they raise Prices.... which means the NEXT time you stay there, prices are higher...

As this attitude becomes systemic? YOU pay for OTHER peoples electricity... because that cost WILL be passed on...

Sad that otherwise smart people, don't realize this...

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 20, 2013 01:04 PM (lZBBB)


Tragedy of the Commons.

You're being responsible won't change anything, as everyone else will likely run up the costs. Thus is is rational in such a situation to use of everything you can.

It's like an all-you-can-eat buffet. You don't leave until you've had ALL YOU CAN EAT... literally.

Posted by: The Political Hat at February 20, 2013 01:48 PM (XvHmy)

264 Don't just turn on all the lights, run the hot water. Not only are you running up the business costs, you're making people take cold showers, which is also funny.

Posted by: Dr Spank at February 20, 2013 01:49 PM (4cRnj)

265 258 Ian S,

Hell I've taken to watching TASS' english feed....

more accurate news without the afterglow anyway

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:49 PM (LRFds)

266 That means I need at least a five from everyone.

A five total, right?

I mean, it's Ace.

Posted by: zsasz at February 20, 2013 01:49 PM (MMC8r)

267 :::You should try Hedonism II in Negril. They drain and clean the hot tubs and pools every night.:::

Yeah... I'm not a swinger. So while cleanliness is a plus, having all the other guests in the hotel expect that my wife wants to be used as a dick pincushion is not how I choose to spend my precious vacation time.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:49 PM (CJjw5)

268 You think a sheet of paper towel is going to keep us apart? That's adorable.
Posted by: The Cum at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (/AHDz)


*vomits on you*

Hah! Who's laughing NOW, cum?

....

Fuck, where'm I going to sleep now? My hotel pillow's all covered in vomit and semen.

Where's EoJ?He's probably been in this situation enough times to know what to do.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:49 PM (4df7R)

269 kensington, there's no need to pile on and insult Burn the Witch





You Kiss Ass.





Posted by: soothsayer at February 20, 2013 01:46 PM (1WM2H)

Brown-nosing is a god-given right.*swoooooon* Obama's so STRONG *swooooon*

Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 45% more DOOM! at February 20, 2013 01:49 PM (xAtAj)

270 FIFY. Yep, I know perfectly well. And I love the place.

Hahaha!!! So you've been there.

Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 01:49 PM (GQ8sn)

271 Japanese game shows...now there's some amusing TV. Ranks right up there with the Springer-like Spanish shows I get sucked into without understanding a word. I can't take my eyes off that shit.

Posted by: DangerGirl - Stop this thing, I want off at February 20, 2013 01:50 PM (f4m0b)

272 can't we all get along.....i haven't seen a troll on this thread we should be all happy and stuff......you are bumming me out....
Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training
***

Rainy days will do that.

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:50 PM (uhftQ)

273 261 PHXGrl,

sorry ma'am I didn't think I joined the dogpile....

here I'll help....


Fuck Sven for piling on EoJ...that shit wasn't funny

maybe we can make self-flaming the national sport

"er wow I guess it really was a spending problem?!?!"

//7 trillion dollar SCOAMF

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:50 PM (LRFds)

274 Rainy days will do that.
Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:50 PM (uhftQ)



Rainy days and Mondays always get me down.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:51 PM (4df7R)

275 we can never say something dark, or funny, or ironic,
There's nothing dark about leaving all the lights on.

The rest is just stupid and wasteful.

Posted by: DaveA at February 20, 2013 01:51 PM (6YLIm)

276 So while cleanliness is a plus, having all the other guests in the hotel
expect that my wife wants to be used as a dick pincushion is not how I
choose to spend my precious vacation time.



Let me show you a place I know in the Dominican Republic!

Posted by: Sen. Bob Menendez at February 20, 2013 01:52 PM (GQ8sn)

277 I walked down to Hedo II one day from Swept Away. The female clientele didn't look like anyone I'd want to catch a venereal disease from.

Posted by: Regular Moron at February 20, 2013 01:52 PM (feFL6)

278 Hahaha!!! So you've been there.

I'm guessing back hair and a speedo.

Posted by: zsasz at February 20, 2013 01:52 PM (MMC8r)

279 Japanese game shows...now there's some amusing TV. Ranks right up there with the Springer-like Spanish shows I get sucked into without understanding a word. I can't take my eyes off that shit.
Posted by: DangerGirl - Stop this thing, I want off at February 20, 2013 01:50 PM (f4m0b)


Japanese game shows are like crack. They make no sense, they're dangerous as hell, but you just can't stop mainlining them. I mean, it never gets old watching grown men and women have metal wash basins dropped on their heads while wrapped in Saran Wrap and dusted in gold powder.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:52 PM (4df7R)

280 254
"Okay am I beyond baseline nuts for beginning to believe that I should get gas every night on the way home from work?"
===============

No!
It's a fine strategy, and I often do that. Psychologically, it's just
easier to take a $10 hit every day then it is to take a $50 hit every
five days.


Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 01:47 PM (/AHDz)

But then there's the non-monetary cost of burning up minutes of your life with these extra stops.
Oh hell, I need gas and it's $5.20/gallon up here in Canuckistan.

Posted by: A Romp of Otters at February 20, 2013 01:52 PM (9ZAcB)

281 I don't bother with the lights much when I travel and use a hotel/motel.

Shower for 30 minutes/ soak in a full tub.

Yessiree bob. No water/sewer bill for me.

Ahhhh.

Sometimes twice. I get so wrinkly it's funny.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 01:53 PM (qyv02)

282
I knew a guy from Idaho who called them "ass-kisses."

he said "Nobody likes an ass kiss."

I remember it because I always thought it was odd how he reversed the phrase.

Posted by: soothsayer at February 20, 2013 01:53 PM (DlaLh)

283 I'm guessing back hair and a speedo.
Posted by: zsasz at February 20, 2013 01:52 PM (MMC8r)

Speedos? God as my witness I have never put on a pair of grape smugglers in my life.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:53 PM (l86i3)

284 Isn't the point of YouTube pretty much "weird shit from other countries"? I mean, try to imagine any kind of record company attempt to make Gangnam Style happen in the 80s.

And of course the patron channel of AoSHQ is BBC America.
Posted by: Ian S. at February 20, 2013 01:47 PM (B/VB5)



A friend of mine was at Comic Con a few years back and got into the Torchwood panel. They were discussing the latest series when the moderator suddenly started laughing and commented that it was amazing how it wasn't even going to be shown in the States for a few more months yet mysteriously everyone in the room seemed to have seen every episode. What a mystery, that.

Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:53 PM (VtjlW)

285 Rainy days and Mondays always get me down.
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit
***

The only good thing about Mondays is that the traffic is lighter. All the people who don't want to go in call in "sick".

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:53 PM (uhftQ)

286 Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:49 PM (CJjw5)

Actually, much of the clientele isn't either. It's just a fun place. And the instances of that type behavior (expect that my wife wants to be used as a dick pincushion) are about the same (anecdotally) as any typical night club or beach-side vacation venue. You'd be surprised at how polite folks in that community usually are.

Posted by: Country Singer at February 20, 2013 01:54 PM (L8r/r)

287
Fuck, where'm I going to sleep now? My hotel pillow's all covered in vomit and semen.


Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:49 PM (4df7R)


----

Use the sheet of glass.

Trust Me.

Posted by: Howard Cosell at February 20, 2013 01:54 PM (nELVU)

288 >>>The rest is just stupid and wasteful.

HEYYYYY...!

Oh wait you were joking.

What a skill some have, to be able to read things beyond the level of the strictly literal.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:54 PM (LCRYB)

289 You know Karen Carpenter is good rage fuel

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 01:54 PM (LRFds)

290 The only good thing about Mondays is that the traffic is lighter. All the people who don't want to go in call in "sick".
Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:53 PM (uhftQ)


Work late on a Friday and you can roll a bowling ball down the highway and hit nothing.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:54 PM (l86i3)

291 "But then there's the non-monetary cost of burning up minutes of your life with these extra stops."
===============

Eh, there's always a gas station on the way for me. It's not necessary to go far out of the way.

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 01:55 PM (/AHDz)

292 266 That means I need at least a five from everyone.

A five total, right?

I mean, it's Ace.

Posted by: zsasz at February 20, 2013 01:49 PM (MMC8r)


http://tinyurl.com/ba8zvjq

Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 20, 2013 01:55 PM (Qxe/p)

293 Dolphins are the gang banging whores of the sea. At least we hold your hand first.
Posted by: Otter #1 at February 20, 2013 01:36 PM (r2PLg)

My hub and I witnessed a duck gangbang once at a local park. It was amazing in a freaky kind of way.
Apparently ducks are the gangbangers of the local pond (which was surrounded by children, BTW).

Posted by: shinypie at February 20, 2013 01:55 PM (Kz85k)

294 A friend of mine was at Comic Con a few years back and got into the
Torchwood panel. They were discussing the latest series when the
moderator suddenly started laughing and commented that it was amazing
how it wasn't even going to be shown in the States for a few more months
yet mysteriously everyone in the room seemed to have seen every
episode. What a mystery, that.



Miracle Day sucked the cum off the blankets at EoJ's hotel.

Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 01:55 PM (GQ8sn)

295 and commented that it was amazing how it wasn't even
going to be shown in the States for a few more months yet mysteriously
everyone in the room seemed to have seen every episode. What a mystery,
that.





Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:53 PM (VtjlW)

*cough cough* bittorrent *cough cough*


What?

Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 01:55 PM (da5Wo)

296 #108
I've been on the road a lot the last few months, lots of hotels. Maybe I'll change my nic to "a regular,every day Jackson Pollock". Sick, I know.

Posted by: fastfreefall at February 20, 2013 01:55 PM (ngjEQ)

297 Work late on a Friday and you can roll a bowling ball down the highway and hit nothing.
Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 01:54 PM (l86i3)


You don't even have to work late. Work until regular old quitting time. Everyone else left work early to get a headstart on the weekend.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 01:56 PM (4df7R)

298 "You found it unfunny in the same way an environmental goon wouldn't find it funny -- "Wow man, nice joke, encouraging WASTE in society and producing results which are suboptimal for mankind."


No, I found it unfunny in the way that a business owner finds it unfunny. Do you think there is no philosophical difference between the two?


"And you got quite the little thrill in doing so."


I did? Were you born with some empathetic superpower, or are you just attributing to me the feelings you get when you do something like this?


See how easy pseudo psychological bullshit is on the internet?


"It's fun to Judge, isn't it? It's fun to Scold, right?"


You tell me big guy. You seem quite proficient, which would indicate a probability of strong self-awareness.


"There is simply no difference between the two -- an objection from environmental nuts and your objection from the "We Must Dedicate Ourselves to Supporting Business" objection. "


If you cannot tell the difference between recognizing actions which hurt business and "dedication to supporting business, that's not my problem.


"No one's allowed to joke when the Moral Scolds are out."


No, apparently no one's allowed to opine that a joke isn't funny one time. It's really ok dude, comedians have jokes that fall flat all the time. They don't flake out and lose it on their audience.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 01:56 PM (yCvxi)

299 Posted by: zsasz at February 20, 2013 01:52 PM (MMC8r)

Actually, no back hair (and very little chest hair, for that matter), and no speedo...or anything else when there. Except in the dining areas, where exposed genitalia is verbotten.

EC, yep, been there.

Posted by: Country Singer at February 20, 2013 01:57 PM (L8r/r)

300 My hub and I witnessed a duck gangbang once at a local park. It was amazing in a freaky kind of way. Apparently ducks are the gangbangers of the local pond (which was surrounded by children, BTW).
Posted by: shinypie
***

You video taped it. Admit it.

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 01:57 PM (uhftQ)

301 Well Maybe...

Posted by: Kramer at February 20, 2013 01:57 PM (l86i3)

302 >>> They don't flake out and lose it on their audience.

You're not my audience and I didn't ask you here.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:57 PM (LCRYB)

303 I doubt anyone gives a rat's ass that you don't think the joke is funny. It's that you come off as a tiresome, humorless scold in expressing that, and a reminder that there's no shortage of douchebags to be found even amongst those with whom one shares some political opinions.
Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 01:43 PM (/AHDz)


Oh sweet, the first sycophant chimes in to defend ace who is more than capable of defending himself. I'm sorry for not toeing the party line here. You go ahead and sling your insults to protect your boyfriend. Consider me duly chastised.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 01:58 PM (yCvxi)

304 Miracle Day sucked the cum off the blankets at EoJ's hotel.

And not in the good way.

Posted by: Ian S. at February 20, 2013 01:59 PM (B/VB5)

305 Burn the witch:

digging

digging

digging


(still no paydirt)

digging

digging

{hey can anybody help me out?}

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 01:59 PM (qyv02)

306 Miracle Day sucked the cum off the blankets at EoJ's hotel.
Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 01:55 PM (GQ8sn)



I actually scream things at my tv when I see that listed on the guide.

Posted by: alexthechick - Chaotic Evil Hobbit. at February 20, 2013 01:59 PM (VtjlW)

307 You video taped it. Admit it.
***

I didn't, but that's a damn fine idea. I have told so many people that story that it would be awesome to have some video to go along with itto illustrate my point about what total assholes ducks are. People think they're so cute but if they only knew...

Posted by: shinypie at February 20, 2013 02:00 PM (Kz85k)

308 EC, yep, been there.

My wife said "have fun" when I told her I found a place for our honeymoon.

I don't like crowds when I go on vacation, so that automatically strikes cruises, resorts, and Vegas from my list. I found a nice place down in the French West Indies that's quiet and isolated. Perfect for the wife to go topless (and bottomless) on a beach with no one bothering her.

Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 02:00 PM (GQ8sn)

309 Seriously folks, put the money in that hat. Quickly. We need that hooker...STAT.

Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 02:00 PM (da5Wo)

310 >>>I'm sorry for not toeing the party line here.

You're not toeing the line?

Hahahaha.

I made a joke which you found to be a Crime Against Business and/or THE ENVIRONMNET and you're sitting here scolding, pointing out the ways I deviated from Proper Conservative Doctrine.

Get this jerkoff: I don't give a shit about Conservative Doctrine and if I do you won't be the one I consult about it.

Fucking another self-appointed Ideological Enforcement Officer, another fucking Conservative Fanboy.

I don't want to be a dick but it says right here you talk like a fag and your shit's all retarded.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:01 PM (LCRYB)

311 They don't flake out and lose it on their audience.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 01:56 PM (yCvxi)

Guest. The term your looking for is Guest.

Like when you're over at someones house, you don't have to laugh at their jokes but you don't proceed to ramble on about how stupid and unfunny they are.

It's not . . . polite.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 02:01 PM (qyv02)

312 Perfect for the wife to go topless (and bottomless) on a beach with no one bothering her.


Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 02:00 PM (GQ8sn)


Oh reary?

Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 02:01 PM (da5Wo)

313 Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:42 PM (LCRYB)

And scolding the scold???

Note... 'I' was the one to first comment on it.... as a small business owner... people wasting my time, or resources, is a pet peeve... as they don't seem to understand the cost to me... which I must then pass on... heck, I'm sitting here right now rebuilding a Server OFF the clock... because one of my business partners allowed someone Admin priveleges so they could listen to 'Free' internet radio... which is the vector the virus used to attack... and as it was 'my guy' who broke procedure and allowed it to happen? I'll eat that cost...

If I could teach one thing to High School students... it would be TANSTAAFL.... and you would probably agree with me...

And that makes me a 'scold'?

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 20, 2013 02:01 PM (lZBBB)

314 I didn't, but that's a damn fine idea. I have told so many people that story that it would be awesome to have some video to go along with itto illustrate my point about what total assholes ducks are. People think they're so cute but if they only knew...
Posted by: shinypie
***

Then dub some cheesy 70's music over the video...

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 20, 2013 02:01 PM (uhftQ)

315 whatever the topic -- Justin Bieber, Star Wars, Dungeons and Dragons, politics -- no one can have a normal conversation when the Fanboyz decide to start correcting everyone.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:02 PM (LCRYB)

316 Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 01:45 PM (CJjw5)


I get the joke, I just didn't think it was funny. It's personal to me, and I understand that. I've been a business owner and had to deal with people mindlessly driving up the cost of my business because they feel entitled to.


I'm not saying the guy can't make jokes, or isn't funny. I just didn't particularly think it was funny. It made perfect sense.


But you're right, next time, I'll just go along to get along. Seriously. The vultures seem to be circling now as I'm trying to stay up with the thread, so I'm sure I'm in for some real treats as I read on.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 02:03 PM (yCvxi)

317 116 Eight hundred thousand civvie jobs to be lost if sequestration, sez Obama defense dept.
Go for it, sez I.
Posted by: The littl shyning man at February 20, 2013 01:21 PM (ndp2I)



Yeah, go fer it.

$85 billion divided by 800,000 works out to $110,000 per annum per furloughed employee. (Yes, I know they've threatened more cutbacks than this, so the math is all loosy-goosy, but it is time to point out how ridiculous these threats are.)

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at February 20, 2013 02:03 PM (Jcd0S)

318 I'm the opposite. I like to keep my DVR at 0%.

Posted by: Serious Cat at February 20, 2013 02:03 PM (UypUQ)

319 you know what is a pet peeve of mine? when someone uses a word...say a word like "scold" and then someone sees that word and takes it as their own.....

Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training at February 20, 2013 02:03 PM (GVxQo)

320 Then dub some cheesy 70's music over the video...
***

Awwwww yeeeeeaaaaahhhhhhh...
"Bow-chicka-wow-wowwwww....bow-chicka-chicka-wowwww..."

Posted by: shinypie at February 20, 2013 02:04 PM (Kz85k)

321
$85 billion divided by 800,000 works out to $110,000 per annum per furloughed employee. (Yes, I know they've threatened more cutbacks than this, so the math is all loosy-goosy, but it is time to point out how ridiculous these threats are.)
Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at February 20, 2013 02:03 PM (Jcd0S)

The great thing about it is Obama will have to make the cuts, who will he piss off?

Posted by: Kramer at February 20, 2013 02:04 PM (l86i3)

322 Oh reary?


Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 02:01 PM (da5Wo)

Oh En Tee!

Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 02:05 PM (GQ8sn)

323 321 Kramer,

DoD...

and I welcome it finally.....

so we go bankrupt no biggie right it is the new "normal"

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 02:05 PM (LRFds)

324 >>>If I could teach one thing to High School students... it would be TANSTAAFL.... and you would probably agree with me...

You know I used to teach myself. You know what concept is impossible to explain to people who don't already know what it is? Irony.

Some people are only capable of reading (or hearing) on a strictly literal level and while I do not want to pound on them for having this limitation, I am kind of sick of having to explain it all the time, rather then they, the ones who have the limitation, simply accepting that sometimes people talk in a foreign language called "Opposite Talk" and maybe they should just chillax on suggesting grammatical corrections in a mode of communication entirely foreign to them.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:05 PM (LCRYB)

325 so we go bankrupt no biggie right it is the new "normal"
Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 02:05 PM (LRFds)

Stupid Kramer sock, Yes, apparently it is.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 02:06 PM (l86i3)

326 You know what part of your problem is, Burn the Witch? You think it's sycophantic to say "thanks" or "I enjoyed that" in the comments, or that it's out of line to say "hey, you're being a douchebag" to someone who's being a douchebag.

Those things are neither sycophantic or out-of-line.

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 02:07 PM (/AHDz)

327 Let me ask the Literalists here:

When you read the article, where I said this:

>>>So there those entries sit, haunting me, mocking me, thirty-two spaces down from the top, just above the The Celebrity Apprentice episode where Gary Busey gets fired.

>>>Classic television. In 20 years that'll be worth something to a collector. Working DVR with the Gary Busey Gets Fired episode in new mint condition? You can't put a price on that. You can't buy a memory.

Did you really think I meant that an old DVR copy of a Celebrity Apprentice episode would be worth money?

Oh wait, my mistake-- you didn't read the article. What was I thinking.

You just saw an opening to Lecture people on Proper Conservative Doctrine and you leaped at it.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:08 PM (LCRYB)

328
Those things are neither sycophantic or out-of-line.
Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 02:07 PM (/AHDz)

I like to start out with, I respectfully disagree. I see where your going with this but I would challenge you to think about how X applies to Y.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 02:09 PM (l86i3)

329 "Miracle Day sucked the cum off the blankets at EoJ's hotel."
===============

Oh my gosh, the first episode was so good, and then it all just...deflated into crap.

It was as bad as "Children of Earth" was good.

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 02:09 PM (/AHDz)

330 :::I get the joke, I just didn't think it was funny. It's personal to me, and I understand that. I've been a business owner and had to deal with people mindlessly driving up the cost of my business because they feel entitled to.:::

Then the polite thing to do would be to say nothing. Or riff another joke off it. You didn't find it funny, but how you responded made it REALLY unfunny. And now you've locked yourself into an e-battle that only has losers.

I've also been a business owner, and am working my way back there. I've also been on the receiving end of Ace's temper, where he infers a bunch of shit about me based on a comment I've made. It's easy enough to ignore.Just walk away.

Lighten up. No one can take your sense of humor. You can only discard it.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 02:09 PM (CJjw5)

331 Your readers aren't your audience? Well knock me over with a feather.


"I made a joke which you found to be a Crime Against Business and/or THE ENVIRONMNET and you're sitting here scolding, pointing out the ways I deviated from Proper Conservative Doctrine."


Yeah, I really said it was a crime and said you deviated from proper conservative doctrine. You're right dude. Go ahead and put me down for thinking your joke was hi-lar-i-ous. I'll never disagree with you again.


I'm really fucking SCOLDING you by saying something isn't funny. Yeah, I'm a real fucking ideological enforcer here dude.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 02:10 PM (yCvxi)

332 "I like to start out with, I respectfully disagree. I see where your
going with this but I would challenge you to think about how X applies
to Y."

===============

I have no idea what you're talking about.

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 02:10 PM (/AHDz)

333 There needs to be easier symbols to represent tones of voice or body language.

If we were talking in person (and had some time of acquaintance) we wouldn't be misinterpreting what others are saying.

At least less than what goes on when only the formation of symbols on a screen are the only means of communicating sometimes very complex situations.

Still, some have their sensitivity dialed up a skosh too high. And then react as if it's life or death because someone said something that struck their particular nerve.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 02:11 PM (qyv02)

334 I have no idea what you're talking about.
Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 02:10 PM (/AHDz)

See how well it works?

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 02:11 PM (l86i3)

335 >>>Your readers aren't your audience?

You're not. Accent on the "You."

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:11 PM (LCRYB)

336 well on that note.....

Posted by: phoenixgirl waiting for spring training at February 20, 2013 02:12 PM (GVxQo)

337 Hey, chewing on tinfoil. That's fun.

Posted by: zsasz at February 20, 2013 02:12 PM (MMC8r)

338 This thread sure is productive.

Burn just take EoJ's advice. It doesn't matter "who's fault" it is, it's not going anywhere.

Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 45% more DOOM! at February 20, 2013 02:12 PM (xAtAj)

339 Well, this thread went all to shit.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 20, 2013 02:13 PM (DrWcr)

340 >>>If we were talking in person (and had some time of acquaintance) we wouldn't be misinterpreting what others are saying.

No offense, but scroll up, my claim that a Gary Busey episode of The Celebrity Apprentice would be worth a fortune to a collector is... a pretty clear tip-off.

So is the claim that if you're not wasting electricity, you're losing money.

There just are a lot of people who are strict literalists and simply do not understand irony, and rather than concede this limitation and make efforts to not let THEIR limitation trouble others, they just insist on applying their Asperger's take on everything.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:13 PM (LCRYB)

341 "See how well it works?"
===============

Yup. You're three for three now.

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 02:13 PM (/AHDz)

342 This is why I never try to play the Peacemaker on the internet. It's more futile than arguing, but not as fun or emotionally gratifying.

The real tragedy would be if our Dick Jokes became a victim of this.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 02:14 PM (CJjw5)

343
Yup. You're three for three now.
Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 02:13 PM (/AHDz)

LOL

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 02:14 PM (l86i3)

344 Hey, chewing on tinfoil. That's fun.

You know there are easier ways to open a fresh condom package?

Posted by: Regular Moron at February 20, 2013 02:14 PM (feFL6)

345 Oh my gosh, the first episode was so good, and then it all just...deflated into crap.


Awesome premise. Poor execution.

And now what? Any more Torchwood's planned?

Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 02:14 PM (GQ8sn)

346 zsasz at February 20, 2013 02:12 PM (MMC8r)

You made my teeth hurt.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 02:14 PM (qyv02)

347 "I've also been a business owner, and am working my way back there. I've also been on the receiving end of Ace's temper, where he infers a bunch of shit about me based on a comment I've made. It's easy enough to ignore.Just walk away.


Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 02:09 PM (CJjw5)



You're right. I should've recognized it. The internet makes warriors out of all of us sometimes.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 02:15 PM (yCvxi)

348 Abalone used to be cheap and plentiful.
Then, teh gay otters.

Pigeons, roaches, rats, mosquitos, flies, otters.

Posted by: Clutch Cargo at February 20, 2013 02:15 PM (Qxdfp)

349 Soooo how about them Cubbies?

Think they got a chance this year?

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 02:15 PM (qyv02)

350 :::Burn just take EoJ's advice. It doesn't matter "who's fault" it is, it's not going anywhere.:::

YOU SHUT YOUR RINO MOUTH, WHORE!

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 02:16 PM (CJjw5)

351 Say goodnight Dick.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 02:16 PM (qyv02)

352 maybe you can also look up the foreign language called "Opposite Talk" and learn to detect the clear signs it's being spoken (such as people saying things that just don't make no sense)

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:16 PM (LCRYB)

353 the unemployed daytime commenters posing as "business owners" is what's funny.

Posted by: Frito Plover, Esq. at February 20, 2013 02:16 PM (UsR5V)

354 When I was visiting Seward, AK there were two otters right off the shore royally kicking each other's asses for several minutes. Then they just stopped, and did the hand-holding float.

Posted by: mephistefales at February 20, 2013 02:16 PM (ow5TU)

355 There just are a lot of people who are strict literalists and simply do not understand irony, and rather than concede this limitation and make efforts to not let THEIR limitation trouble others, they just insist on applying their Asperger's take on everything.

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:13 PM (LCRYB)

Literally.

Posted by: Sheriff Joe B. at February 20, 2013 02:17 PM (Sg0G/)

356 "You're not. Accent on the "You."
Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:11 PM (LCRYB)"



ace,


I'm going to take your advice. I humbly recommend you do the same.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 02:17 PM (yCvxi)

357 you notice they never actually describe the business they allegedly own?

Posted by: Frito Plover, Esq. at February 20, 2013 02:17 PM (UsR5V)

358 "And now what? Any more Torchwood's planned?"
===============

As far as I know, there's nothing, except that it's certain Starz isn't going to make any more. Jack Barrowman has said he wants to do more, but that doesn't mean anything other than "Jack Barrowman wants more Torchwood paychecks," and who can blame him for that?

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 02:17 PM (/AHDz)

359 is that opposite talk or literal?

Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:17 PM (LCRYB)

360 YOU SHUT YOUR RINO MOUTH, WHORE!

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 02:16 PM (CJjw5)

Damn dude. Damn.
*starts reading HuffPo*

Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 45% more DOOM! at February 20, 2013 02:17 PM (xAtAj)

361 Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:05 PM (LCRYB)

And apparenlty when someone misses a joke... perhaps because they are not in the mood at the time for the humor... they are not Stupid, nor impaired... nor 'incapable'... funny how someone with as many Socks as I, could not understand the concept of Irony....

But I can see this 'conversation' has devolved to the point of 'making you sick'... and this is 'your house' as others have pointed out... so I think I'll take a bit of a break...

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 20, 2013 02:18 PM (lZBBB)

362 the unemployed daytime commenters posing as "business owners" is what's funny.


Former business owner actually. But don't let that stop you from a good zinger.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 02:19 PM (yCvxi)

363 royally kicking each other's asses for several minutes. Then they just stopped, and did the hand-holding float.
Posted by: mephistefales at February 20, 2013 02:16 PM (ow5TU)

Did you think your Mom and Dad were "wrestling" when you were a kid?

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 02:19 PM (qyv02)

364 Asperger's take on everything.


Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:13 PM (LCRYB)


Wow... aspergers? For not finding ONE particular joke funny....

Wow.... just.... wow....

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 20, 2013 02:21 PM (lZBBB)

365 Did you think your Mom and Dad were "wrestling" when you were a kid?
Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 02:19 PM (qyv02)


Then just what in the hell were they doing?

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 02:21 PM (l86i3)

366 geeze, Jimi and Jim and Buddy go off an cap themselves and bask in glory for the next half century. I wreck my health for the family business and I'm the jerk.
peace, Carpenter, K.

Posted by: Karen is a lovely girl at February 20, 2013 02:21 PM (Kxz3Y)

367 YOU SHUT YOUR RINO MOUTH, WHORE!

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 02:16 PM (CJjw5)

I think this is what EoJ Hotel Hellion says when a guest asks about valet parking.

Posted by: kathysaysso at February 20, 2013 02:22 PM (6H6o8)

368 Then just what in the hell were they doing?

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy
Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 02:21 PM (l86i3)
Hunting Hobos, as god intended.

Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 45% more DOOM! at February 20, 2013 02:22 PM (xAtAj)

369 "is that opposite talk or literal?


Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 02:17 PM (LCRYB)"



If you were directing this at me, I was being literal. We're both guilty of the thing you've recently been railing about. I'm respectfully backing off by reflecting upon your own observations and simply recommending the same in return.


If you weren't directing that at me, then well, what I just said still stands.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 02:22 PM (yCvxi)

370 As far as I know, there's nothing, except that it's certain Starz isn't
going to make any more. Jack Barrowman has said he wants to do more, but
that doesn't mean anything other than "Jack Barrowman wants more
Torchwood paychecks," and who can blame him for that?



I hope he kept that "hand" prop!

heh...

Posted by: EC at February 20, 2013 02:22 PM (GQ8sn)

371 Then just what in the hell were they doing?
Posted by: Oldsailors Poet is no longer shamelessly hawking his book Amy Lynn available on amazon. at February 20, 2013 02:21 PM (l86i3)

Nude yoga?

Posted by: Insomniac at February 20, 2013 02:23 PM (DrWcr)

372 :::you notice they never actually describe the business they allegedly own?:::

Former restaurant owner, dipshit. And am currently in my office right now while waiting for a meeting which may or may not happen. And will be logged in and working from home tonight over VPN, as well.

And how are you spending YOUR day, cupcake?

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 02:23 PM (CJjw5)

373 Well, not eating is a little more self motivated than a smack overdose or a plane crash.

You really, really have to counter some basic instincts and bodily impulses.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 02:24 PM (qyv02)

374 It's not like straights are sitting here heroically resisting the urge for cock.



Posted by: ace at February 20, 2013 01:22 PM (LCRYB)

Speak for yourself!


Posted by: kathysaysso at February 20, 2013 01:30 PM (6H6o


I luffs the moronettes.

Posted by: eleven at February 20, 2013 02:24 PM (KXm42)

375 BREAK

Back to your corners and wait for the bell.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 02:25 PM (qyv02)

376 Burn the Witch,

we need "sarc" or "droll" tags....that said the nation is a handcuffed and hogtied Indiana Jones WRT "economics" so I talk about "why not let us all print money like Timmy T and Helicopter ben do it keynes style?"


http://youtu.be/db5rRtOExbA

there's a horrible reset coming

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 02:25 PM (LRFds)

377 @kathysaysso,

I am really enjoying the Hotel Hellion riff, BTW. Didn't want to comment on it and ruin the magic.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 02:25 PM (CJjw5)

378 My worst moment in people not getting a joke:

When I was in college I taught an undergrad geology lab. One of the lessons was learning the Grand Canyon type section. (This included learning, in order, about 20 major rock formations such as the Moenkopi Shale and the Navajo Sandstone, along with their ages.)

One of the formations was the Coconino Sandstone. I was trying to help them remember it so I said, "You know, like Kokonino County in Krazy Kat!"

Slack-jawed and glaze-eyed they stared at me. So, to make it worse, I said, "You know, Krazy Kat and Ignatz the Mouse!" Crickets.

So THEN, I imitated Krazy Kat and explained that she would say "Oh, Ignatz, my pwecious!" after he hit her in the head with a brick.

They all thought I was insane.

Apparently the kids who grew up 5-10 years after me never saw those cartoons.

I have since recovered from my mortification, but it took about 20 years. LOL!

Posted by: Miss Marple at February 20, 2013 02:26 PM (GoIUi)

379 372 EoJ,

what style of joint you run?

I ran a Pizza joint in college that had a few sideline dishes.....

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 02:26 PM (LRFds)

380 "you notice they never actually describe the business they allegedly own"


Would you like me to describe my former business that I recently had to close and put employees out on their ass, or are you more comfortable accusing other people of lying?

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 02:26 PM (yCvxi)

381 are those otters life partners?

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 20, 2013 02:28 PM (8sCoq)

382 Would you like me to describe my former business
that I recently had to close and put employees out on their ass, or are
you more comfortable accusing other people of lying?

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 02:26 PM (yCvxi)


So you weren't able to keep it open? Damn. Sorry to hear that.

Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 02:29 PM (da5Wo)

383 sven,

It was contemporary American fine dining. Critical success and a commercial failure during the worst timing in modern history to open a pricey restaurant.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 02:30 PM (CJjw5)

384 You should have done Wimpie quotes. They would've GOT that.


I know it's tragic but they don't allow decent cartoons anymore. In print OR tv.

Costs too much and I think they've done studies and found that they demographic they're trying to hit doesn't care if the toons are well crafted and drawn.

Many cartoon characters were actually drawn for adult amusement for the intermissions back when a day at the movies was a day at the movies. 1 or 2 shorts and couple cartoons and then the main feature. You could be in the movie house for 3-4 hours.

{sigh}

righty oh

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 02:30 PM (qyv02)

385 Burn, you're taking things waaayyyy to personal and serious.

You need some C2H5OH, stat.

Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 02:32 PM (qyv02)

386 Apparently the kids who grew up 5-10 years after me never saw those cartoons.

Yeah, I know the feeling. I hit the morons with an ancient Natalie Wood joke in this thread about 'washing ashore' and I didn't get one LOL. I'm feelin' old.

Posted by: Regular Moron at February 20, 2013 02:33 PM (feFL6)

387 "So you weren't able to keep it open? Damn. Sorry to hear that.


Posted by: BCochran1981 at February 20, 2013 02:29 PM (da5Wo)"



Nope. Tried heroically though. I think it was because you fellow NE FL morons didn't meet up at the place on election night. As a matter of fact, that's probably why we lost the election.


Yeah, that's it...

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 02:34 PM (yCvxi)

388 Mr Sven, when you say side dishes...is that euphemisms for that "surprise" in the pizzabox with a hole in it?

Posted by: fastfreefall at February 20, 2013 02:34 PM (ngjEQ)

389 Is it too late for me to hop in here and say that everybody at some point in their life jumps to or draws the wrong conclusion about something, and that calling each other stupid because of it is as futile as it is frustrating?


Handshakes all around, folks. We're better than this, ne? Let's go with Burn the Witch's olive branch and start fresh.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 20, 2013 02:35 PM (4df7R)

390 >Yeah, I know the feeling. I hit the morons with an
ancient Natalie Wood joke in this thread about 'washing ashore' and I
didn't get one LOL. I'm feelin' old.

Posted by: Regular Moron at February 20, 2013 02:33 PM (feFL6)

And I would have come back with a William Holden Drinking Helmet quip

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 20, 2013 02:35 PM (8sCoq)

391 "It was contemporary American fine dining. Critical success and a commercial failure during the worst timing in modern history to open a pricey restaurant.
Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 02:30 PM (CJjw5)"



I didn't know you were doing the restaurant thing too. Here's a tip, the less expensive route isn't the way to go either.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 02:36 PM (yCvxi)

392 372 :::you notice they never actually describe the business they allegedly own?::: And how are you spending YOUR day, cupcake?


Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 02:23 PM (CJjw5)


Wow... can't let this one lie... Moi? as I stated above, AT work, rebuilding a server in my office... I am part owner of a very small IT support company, whose main clients are Drs.... ie... lots of Electronic Medical Record crap...

/he says watching the little bars go across the screen on the second virus scan run...

But hey..... I guess its easier to cast apersions on those of us with Asperbergers.../shakes head...

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 20, 2013 02:37 PM (lZBBB)

393 "Burn, you're taking things waaayyyy to personal and serious."


Nah, not really. My initial comment wasn't really as emotional as it seems to have come across. My failing really. I just tripped ace's Fight! switch and he tripped mine and it was Battle of the egos after that.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 02:37 PM (yCvxi)

394 Critical success and a commercial failure during the worst timing in modern history to open a pricey restaurant.

Restaurant business is about the toughest of them all. Most fail within 10 years. Actually ~90% of all new businesses fail within the first 10 years. Unless you're selling heroin under the table.

Posted by: Regular Moron at February 20, 2013 02:38 PM (feFL6)

395 You need some C2H5OH, stat.


Posted by: Bitter Clinger (aka Ol' 3 tooth) at February 20, 2013 02:32 PM (qyv02)


Me too... but its too early in the work day here on the Left Coast...

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 20, 2013 02:39 PM (lZBBB)

396 377
@kathysaysso,



I am really enjoying the Hotel Hellion riff, BTW. Didn't want to comment on it and ruin the magic.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 20, 2013 02:25 PM (CJjw5)

Credit goes to Ian S. and sven for inspiring me.
"I used to work in hotel management. Nice hotels. Expensive hotels."
I can read between the lines. Pimp in a brothel. Got it.

Posted by: kathysaysso at February 20, 2013 02:39 PM (6H6o8)

397 >Actually ~90% of all new businesses fail within the first 10 years. Unless you're selling heroin under the table.

Posted by: Regular Moron at February 20, 2013 02:38 PM (feFL6)

Damn- and I was going to open a speakeasy for stoners

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 20, 2013 02:40 PM (8sCoq)

398 390
>Yeah, I know the feeling. I hit the morons with an

ancient Natalie Wood joke in this thread about 'washing ashore' and I

didn't get one LOL. I'm feelin' old.



Posted by: Regular Moron at February 20, 2013 02:33 PM (feFL6)

I laughed out loud. Truly.

Posted by: kathysaysso at February 20, 2013 02:41 PM (6H6o8)

399 the rooms have a place to put your magnetic key card to enable power to the outlets

Saw that in the Philipines about 5 years ago. Stick any old card in there, they don't spend money on another reader, it just operates a switch. Then you don't come back to a hot room after a day out.

Posted by: Alec Baldwin at February 20, 2013 02:43 PM (UU0OF)

400 Hey, Burn the Witch, I apologize for being so harsh in my comments to you.

Posted by: Kensington at February 20, 2013 02:46 PM (/AHDz)

401 No problem brother. It's the internet.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at February 20, 2013 02:48 PM (yCvxi)

402 Sea otters rape baby seals to death:

http://news.discovery.com/animals/the-other-side-of-otters.htm

Posted by: JohnW at February 20, 2013 03:27 PM (44oMx)

403 I *just* deleted 40+ episodes of FRINGE to make room Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is one of my favorites

Posted by: Amy Shulkusky at February 20, 2013 03:37 PM (bdged)

404 Ah geez - I'm a latecomer - again. Why can't I ever post/see these before they are dead threads?

Posted by: Amy Shulkusky at February 20, 2013 03:39 PM (bdged)

405 388 fastfreeforall,

erm //Sven Pizza hellion...

no no not really we also did sandwiches, pasta, and salads...

none up to snuff for a real italian joint but good enough for a sideline....

EoJ,

well if your recipes were good and we ever get a recovery you may try again...although your not so silent partner the federal government wants to stop you

Posted by: sven10077 at February 20, 2013 04:07 PM (LRFds)

406 DishNetwork let's you transfer shows to external hard drives. I have three 1TB drives sitting on a shelf, filled with movies and entire seasons of shows. No more space limitations. No need to make the Sophie's choice between "Three's Company" and "Thundercats."

Posted by: wooga at February 20, 2013 04:07 PM (jBgKG)

407
Apparently otters hold paws with each other while they sleep on the water.

Probably so if one get munched on by something, the other one will be awakened by the sudden jerk and make an escape.

Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie at February 20, 2013 04:12 PM (1hM1d)






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