Piers Morgan, Papal Truther

Pope Benedict, who's 85, says he's stepping down due to deteriorating health.

I repeat: He's 85. Human health does indeed often deteriorate in the upper 80's.

You may wonder why I'm telling you something so obvious. I'm not telling you.

Carnival barker Piers Morgan isn't having it.

As a Catholic, I'm not buying this. Popes don't just quit because they're tired. What's going on here??

I assume that means he'll have a show tonight pushing his speculations and conspiracy theories.

Have They Frisked Benedict for Spoons & Artifacts?

Tonight on Piers Morgan, verified photos of the Pope making off with the silver. Like Judas.


Posted by: Ace at 01:02 PM



Comments

1 1st?

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:03 PM (8sCoq)

2 As a Catholic, I'm not buying Piers as a Catholic.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:03 PM (gmeXX)

3 Theory:

The Pope heard about the million dollar reward for Dorner's capture and is thinking about it.

Posted by: EC at February 11, 2013 01:03 PM (GQ8sn)

4
I was going to say he's a Poper, but he's more like a pooper.

Posted by: @JohnTant at February 11, 2013 01:04 PM (eytER)

5 jeebus weeping! what is it with Piers Morgan- must be desperate for viewers

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:04 PM (8sCoq)

6 As a Protestant, I'm not buying Obama as a Christian.

Posted by: HoboJerky, now with 74% more DOOM! at February 11, 2013 01:04 PM (FsUAO)

7 As a Catholic, I'm not buying this. Popes don't just quit because they're tired. What's going on here??


The Church is trying to very discreetly say that he has dementia and/or is terminally ill? This is not rocket surgery.





Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Team Stompy. at February 11, 2013 01:04 PM (VtjlW)

8 The Pope?

Posted by: Yeah, I'm gonna be that guy at February 11, 2013 01:04 PM (KXm42)

9 The Pope's a quitter.

He's probably got a contract for a reality show on Fox.

Posted by: jwest at February 11, 2013 01:05 PM (ZDsRL)

10 anyone get the catpiss trolls sisters hairdressers psychologists take on this pope thing yet ?

Posted by: cu'chulainn at February 11, 2013 01:05 PM (Vk2CC)

11 "As a Catholic, I'm not buying this. Popes don't just quit because they're tired. What's going on here??"

He's so revolted that you're a co-religionist that he just couldn't take the stench.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 11, 2013 01:05 PM (XkWWK)

12 A s a Catholic, I'm not buying those Catholics who voted for the baby-killing SCOAMF as Catholics.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 11, 2013 01:06 PM (7ObY1)

13 FFS the man is 85 years old and apparently has become quite frail with age- why is it a mystery that he might step down and let a younger stronger man step up as Pope?

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:07 PM (8sCoq)

14 On his way out I wish the Pope would excommunicate Pelosi and her ilk....

Posted by: Hello, it's me Donna let it burn really.really bummed at February 11, 2013 01:07 PM (9+ccr)

15 ATC, Morgan knows this, he is just trying to get himself in the middle os a different controversy than gun control. I think he has been having trouble getting away from his gun control garbage and the killer lefty in LA.

Posted by: museisluse at February 11, 2013 01:07 PM (G4YiV)

16 It aPIERS he's a loony.

Posted by: Y-not at February 11, 2013 01:07 PM (5H6zj)

17 Twitter brings out the stupid, again.

Posted by: Serious Cat at February 11, 2013 01:07 PM (UypUQ)

18 is it possible that failing to get Pelosi and Reed ex-communicated, he said "screw it, LIB!"?

Posted by: cu'chulainn at February 11, 2013 01:07 PM (Vk2CC)

19 This makes his tweet this morning saying that popes do not resign to be even more stupid. I told him he obviously didn't study European history.

Now I realize he never even studied his catechism.

Posted by: Miss Marple at February 11, 2013 01:08 PM (GoIUi)

20 The word out this morning was that he said when he took the job he would step down when he felt like he could not carry it out any more.


Why can't people simply take him at his word. Not everything is a conspiracy.

Posted by: Vic at February 11, 2013 01:08 PM (53z96)

21 There must be a link to Global Warming there somewhere.

Posted by: Marmo at February 11, 2013 01:08 PM (QW+AD)

22 Jeebus.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:08 PM (UOM48)

23 Piers Morgan......the wind beneath Dorner's wings....

Posted by: sven10077 at February 11, 2013 01:08 PM (LRFds)

24 Hitler was a Catholic; so was Goebbels, IIRC.


Stalin was a seminary student in the Orthodox Church in Georgia ( over there, not north of Florida )

Posted by: DOA in Scrambletown, FLA at February 11, 2013 01:08 PM (Dll6b)

25 Piers Morgan is a Catholic? Some questions:

1. How often does he attend Mass?

2. Does he adhere to the Church's teachings on Life?

If the answers are (1) never or rarely; and/or (2) no, he's pro-abortion, then he has no business calling himself Catholic. It's not an ethnicity, it's a belief.

Oh, and I note from Wikipedia that he's divorced.

Piers Morgan claiming he's Catholic to establish his bona fides to offer conspiracy theories about Pope Benedict is a bit like Obama claiming he shoots skeet "all the time" to establish his bona fides to criticize gun owners.

Posted by: The Regular Guy at February 11, 2013 01:08 PM (qHCyt)

26 curious aboutold men's health, politician's reproductive lives, "cat- fishing" andKardashians, incurious about Obama hit squads and arms sales to terrorists. Journalism!! What can't it do

Posted by: thunderb at February 11, 2013 01:09 PM (Dnbau)

27

Hell, as a Cahholic myself I'm not buying it.

Not since Celestine V has a duly elected Pope retired. In Dante's Inferno, Celestine was shown in the crowd of neutrals excluded from Hell, because of his abdication. "The Great Refusal" it was called. Brought Boniface VIII into power, one of the most corrupt of all popes.

Really popes DON'T retire.

Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 01:09 PM (UaxA0)

28 Piers Moran and other media folk on Twitter is exactly how they'd sound on TV if their producers were taken away from them.

Posted by: Serious Cat at February 11, 2013 01:09 PM (UypUQ)

29 AtC - Occam's razor leads me to believe that he probably does have dementia or onset of it. If he was terminally ill, he'd likely just stay on. From what I read, you can only resign freely of your will. So the dementia idea makes sense. Resign now of your own free will and spare the Church of having to deal with the mess of a Pope with Alzhemiers. Of course all of this is simple speculation. But I suspect you are right.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:09 PM (gmeXX)

30 Hey Piers, I'll get right on this story after I finish my piece proving, once and for all, that Trig Palin was Bristol's child and not Sarah's child.

Posted by: Andrew Sullivan at February 11, 2013 01:09 PM (e0xKF)

31 Popes don't resign. Google it, people!

Posted by: Rosie Morgan at February 11, 2013 01:09 PM (RD7QR)

32 Barack Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a malignant traitor.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 01:09 PM (8y9MW)

33 Piers a Catholic? And the Pope is Italian.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 01:09 PM (VpkjW)

34 First thing I thought when I heard the Pope was resigning was, "OMG, Curious' priest's barber's cousin's friend was right!"

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:09 PM (UOM48)

35 As a Catholic, I'm not buying this. Popes don't just quit because they're tired. What's going on here??

As an observer of facts, I'm pretty sure they stated he was more than just tired.

Posted by: Adam Smith's Invisible Pimp Hand at February 11, 2013 01:09 PM (NzBQO)

36 There is something seriously wrong with this man.

Posted by: RUReadingthis at February 11, 2013 01:09 PM (V92KK)

37 The Pope could just kick back in his room and take it easy. He's got room service, hot and cold running nuns and a great medical plan.

Quitting because he feels he can't serve the office he's held as well as someone else could? Who thinks like that?

Posted by: jwest at February 11, 2013 01:10 PM (ZDsRL)

38 Damn... he's getting too close to the truth.

Time to let Steve Guttenberg loose on him!!1!

Posted by: Stonecutters at February 11, 2013 01:10 PM (XvHmy)

39
Piers Morgan says..."I'm not buying this"...about the Pope, 85, who want's to retire for health reasons...

But he 'buys' all the lies that come out of this White House?

Where has he been hiding this sort of scepticism?

Posted by: wheatie at February 11, 2013 01:10 PM (w27/Q)

40 >A s a Catholic, I'm not buying those Catholics who voted for the baby-killing SCOAMF as Catholics.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 11, 2013 01:06 PM (7ObY1)

I'm not Catholic or particular religious, but it seems to me that if you call yourself an adherent of a religion, you are all in, or you are not
I have little respect for people who take an a la carte approach to their faith's views, then call them selves true believers

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:10 PM (8sCoq)

41 "As an Attention Whore, I'm not buying this. Popes don't just quit because they're tired. What's going on here??"
Tune in to find out.

----------------

BTW -- I knew a rocket surgeon. Dumber than a box of leaded Bidens.

Posted by: eleven at February 11, 2013 01:10 PM (KXm42)

42 Popes don't resign. Google it, people!

--

And America doesn't elect socialists.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:11 PM (gmeXX)

43 Piers Morgan expects me to believe he's a Catholic? Pull the other one, you limey git, it's got bells on.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:11 PM (4df7R)

44 The things carnival barkers do to get attention.

Posted by: John P. Squibob at February 11, 2013 01:11 PM (kqqGm)

45 It's simple, i'm just angling for that morning anchor spot on CNN

Posted by: Benny 16 at February 11, 2013 01:11 PM (SO2Q8)

46 How could the pope possibly be concerned with hijacking artifacts when he, himself, is a walking relic?

Posted by: Fritz at February 11, 2013 01:11 PM (WM+rJ)

47 Who the fuck has a first name of Piers and a girly last name like Morgan?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at February 11, 2013 01:12 PM (9Bj8R)

48 Piers Morgan is a Catholic? In what alternate universe?

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at February 11, 2013 01:12 PM (RZ8pf)

49 Pope Gregory resigned 400 years ago.

Clementine (whom Dante put in hell) was subsequently made a Saint.

We are facing a probably relegation of Catholics to second class citizens in the largest republic in the world. It would be good if someone supporting the Faith was a younger, stronger person.


Posted by: Miss Marple at February 11, 2013 01:12 PM (GoIUi)

50 Is Piers Morgan a egotistical, narcisstic douchebag?

Is the Pope Catholic?

Posted by: polynikes at February 11, 2013 01:12 PM (m2CN7)

51
If he leaves while wearing the pope hat then you know he's stealing stuff. You could fit a fortune under it.

Posted by: Ben at February 11, 2013 01:12 PM (C2Y4l)

52 Someone send Piers a nice Jello salad.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:12 PM (UOM48)

53 2 As a Catholic, I'm not buying Piers as a Catholic.
Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:03 PM (gmeXX)

2 As a non-Catholic with a functioning brain, I'm not buying Piers as a Catholic.

Posted by: chique d'afrique on her phone at February 11, 2013 01:13 PM (6zgse)

54 I'm pretty sure Piers only worships himself

Posted by: thunderb at February 11, 2013 01:13 PM (Dnbau)

55 Tonight on Piers Morgan, verified photos of the Pope making off with the silver. Like Judas.


ow. owowowowow. ow. I know better than to eat whilst reading the comments. ow. I think I just inhaled an entire french fry.


Randomly (and not like anyone cares), ace, I got around to watching Chronicle last night and you are correct about it being really good. That may be one of the very few times where the found footage conceit worked to improve the story. I was pondering the comparisons to Carrie and when poking around IMDB, I found out that the guy who played Matt is playing Billy Nolan in the Carrie remake. That's a bit freaky.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Team Stompy. at February 11, 2013 01:13 PM (VtjlW)

56 He had to retire. The'yre onto him

Posted by: Ben at February 11, 2013 01:13 PM (C2Y4l)

57 ::: In Dante's Inferno, Celestine was shown in the crowd of neutrals excluded from Hell, because of his abdication. :::

You're aware that Dante's Inferno isn't an eyewitness account, right?

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 11, 2013 01:13 PM (nxyLn)

58 I have little respect for people who take an a la carte approach to their faith's views, then call them selves true believers

---

I have little respect for people who want to modify religion to suit their own personal needs. You know its ok to accept that you are sinner and try to change (even if you fail and sin again). I am not interested in a Church changing its beliefs just so that we have less sinners.

Anyway, I take comfort in the fact that Benedict's cardinal promotions likely prevent any liberalization of the Church.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:13 PM (gmeXX)

59 Okay, legit question here.

I understand that this is a "Big Deal" from a "Wow! This is rare!" standpoint. There's also the point that if the Pope is stepping down for some nonsense reason, that's a big commitment on which to reneg.

Beyond that, though, why is this such a big deal? I mean, I get the Historic aspect of it, but if you believe that he's being honest (or even if he's obfuscating for onset of dementia or something)? Is it somehow disruptive to the operations of the RC church? I figured the church would just keep-on-keeping-on until a new Pope had been elected.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 01:14 PM (8y9MW)

60 54
I'm pretty sure Piers only worships himself Obama.


Fixed

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:14 PM (UOM48)

61 Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:09 PM (gmeXX)


Pennies to nickles this is it. Terminal illness doesn't make a ton of sense if only because Benedict is pope largely because of his incredible theological mind. He could pope it up from a bed for as long as he can communicate clearly.
One wonders if we've ever had a dementia afflicted pope in recent history? JP2 had tons of diseases but dementia was not among them. His predecessor died to soon to tell. It's entirely possible we haven't in a long time. And even if we did, medicine is just now getting to a point where we can see it coming in a quick enough fashion.

Morgan is just itching for a new scandal.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:14 PM (oG3dE)

62 I haven't seen the type of funeral a retired Pope gets, but if it isn't as good as a sitting Pope, he's giving up one kick-ass sendoff.

Posted by: jwest at February 11, 2013 01:14 PM (ZDsRL)

63 Nah send Piers a nice large box. Yeah its marked Jello salad. But it kinda wobbles on its own. But its all good. Really.

Isn't it amazing how many 'experts' on Catholicism are coming out of the woodwork. Where is Black Flag when you need it?

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 01:14 PM (VpkjW)

64
53
2 As a Catholic, I'm not buying Piers as a Catholic.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:03 PM (gmeXX)



2 As a non-Catholic with a functioning brain, I'm not buying Piers as a Catholic

As a person, I'm not buying Piers as a Human...

Posted by: Hello, it's me Donna let it burn really.really bummed at February 11, 2013 01:14 PM (9+ccr)

65 Benedict must be a tea partier gun nut!

Posted by: PJ at February 11, 2013 01:14 PM (ZWaLo)

66 It not a surprise that another so called "catholic" person of the ilk of the Pelosi's and Kennedy's gives some kind of moronic, ignorant statement with no knowledge of the situation. Again, the Left of the Church, the so called liberal Catholics talk out of their ASS. Who needs muslims killing christians when the liberal christians are doing it already?????

Posted by: marcus tullius cicero at February 11, 2013 01:14 PM (EAuyj)

67
He's "not buying this" about the Pope...but he totally 'bought' that Benghazi was about a Youtube video.

Posted by: wheatie at February 11, 2013 01:14 PM (w27/Q)

68 Actually, it's been a lifelong dream to play LB for the Ravens. I'm going for it.

Posted by: Benny 16 at February 11, 2013 01:15 PM (SO2Q8)

69 Hitler was a Catholic


Hitler was baptized Catholic but rejected Catholicism when he came of age.

Little babies don't "decide" what religion they are. Just because Hitler was BORN Catholic doesn't mean he was Catholic.

Not to mention the old saying about bringing Hitler into a debate, automatically losing, etc. etc.

Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 11, 2013 01:15 PM (7ObY1)

70 Piss Organ is an ex-communicator.

Posted by: Joe Mama at February 11, 2013 01:15 PM (BKLED)

71 -

Our Man Piers made a comparison between the Pope and Queen Elizabeth - basically calling the Pope a pussy.

Well, Piers, Pope Benedict XVI wasn't born into royalty.

Jackass.
_

Posted by: BumperStickerist at February 11, 2013 01:15 PM (RuUvx)

72 Not to mention the old saying about bringing Hitler into a debate, automatically losing, etc. etc.
Posted by: BlueStateRebel at February 11, 2013 01:15 PM (7ObY1)

That, plus Hitler was trying to revive Teutonic paganism as essentially a state religion.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 11, 2013 01:16 PM (DrWcr)

73 The Pope is also giving up his sweet living quarters. Heard on the news this morning he's going to move to a monastery.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:16 PM (UOM48)

74 I know it's a slow news day, but seriously.

Who, at this point, gives a flying fuck about Pierced Morgan?

Posted by: © Sponge at February 11, 2013 01:16 PM (xmcEQ)

75 Who cares?

Posted by: People with average IQ at February 11, 2013 01:16 PM (+iUsQ)

76 So is Benedict going to go into some sort of monastic seclusion? I've heard about his continuing to write, but will he actually be completely away from the public?

Posted by: AmishDude at February 11, 2013 01:16 PM (T0NGe)

77
Maybe this is a good precedent, that Benedict is retiring because of failing health, and not waiting to die as Pope. It gives the College of Cardinals more time to think at their task of voting in a new Pope.

John Paul II was truly God's good servant here on Earth, but his failing health in his latter yearshurt his ability to perform. I know there was this thought that his suffering was part of life and he wanted to accept is as that, but he was almost incapacitated from pain at the end.

Disclaimer: I am not a Catholic, although I am married to one.

Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes.... at February 11, 2013 01:16 PM (RFeQD)

78 You're aware that Dante's Inferno isn't an eyewitness account, right?
Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 11, 2013 01:13 PM (nxyLn)

Everything I know about Dante's Inferno I learned from Travolta's dance movie 'Staying Alive'

Posted by: polynikes at February 11, 2013 01:16 PM (m2CN7)

79

Have They Frisked Benedict for Spoons Artifacts?

Tonight on Piers Morgan, verified photos of the Pope making off with the silver. Like Judas.


Didn't the Clinton's leave The White House with just about everything that wasn't bolted down?

Posted by: © Sponge at February 11, 2013 01:17 PM (xmcEQ)

80 Just to be clear -

Benedict is "a" Pope.
Not "The" Pope.

_

Posted by: Greek Orthodoxy at February 11, 2013 01:17 PM (RuUvx)

81 imp -

There's actually a lot of debate over the identity of the shade who made "The Great Refusal" in Dante's Inferno. Dante is deliberately vague. It is probably Celestine. But there are many other candidates, including Pontius Pilate.

Posted by: MikeJ at February 11, 2013 01:17 PM (Us4M2)

82 I'd have gone on your show to announce my retirement Piers, but i wanted people to actually find out i'm retiring.

Posted by: Benny 16 at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (SO2Q8)

83 What Greek Orthodoxy said.

Posted by: Coptic Christianity at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (RuUvx)

84 John Paul II always gave me a warm fuzzy feeling (I'm not Catholic) like he was talking to me personally. He always had a smiley face and just came across as nice. This guy Benedict, not feeling the warm and fuzzies with this one. Kinda creepy.

I hope they pick someone who is much younger and I hope they don't pick a black guy, cause quite frankly I'm tired of all the "black" this and that for the last 4 years. However, I think that is exactly who they will pick, to appeal to the idiots in the Catholic church who voted for the idiot in the white house.

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (9U1OG)

85 Our Man Piers made a comparison between the Pope and Queen Elizabeth - basically calling the Pope a pussy.

Well, Piers, Pope Benedict XVI wasn't born into royalty.


Plus, the queen can literally be a figurehead. The Pope is expected to be engaged with the church. There is presiding over mass as well as a number of other functions that his subordinates just can't take on.

Posted by: AmishDude at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (T0NGe)

86 AllenG - I find it a big deal simply because the Pope is a big deal, now and much more throughout history. As a Catholic, I'm sure it is certainly personal to me, as I am interested in the direction of the Church. The fact that it is through resignation, just adds an added element. And the fact that it sends the liberal media in a tizzy as they hope for a moderate Pope just brings personal satisfcation knowing they will be let down.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (gmeXX)

87 Damn next thing you know Empire of Jeff is going to be telling us that the Odyssey wasn't really a travel guide.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (RZ8pf)

88 What's the Catholic position on doing the happy dance on top of little kids' graves, eh, Piers?

Posted by: Insomniac at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (DrWcr)

89 I'm not a Catholic but I'm pretty sure the faith kind of looks down on accusing the Pope to have nefarious motives. Besides how much you want to make before this morning Morgan had no idea how bad the Popes health is. I'm sure he thought that by resigning, The Pope was moving to Boca and do a little lawn bowling. The man isn't very bright.

Posted by: lowandslow at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (7Nq2G)

90
So.... lemme get this straight.

The same folks who hated Benedict as Pope.... the Nazi.... TOO Catholic.... Too Old.....

.... are now whipbitching about Benedict giving up the power of the papacy????


Posted by: fixerupper at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (nELVU)

91 :::Everything I know about Dante's Inferno I learned from Travolta's dance movie 'Staying Alive':::

That's DISCO Inferno.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (nxyLn)

92


Oh, EoJ, you're so silly. Of COURSE it's an eyewitness account. Dante said he did, right?

Seriously, what I mean is that resigning is a monumental scandal, and opens a historically dangerous can of Worms (see what I did there?)

Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (UaxA0)

93 "As a Catholic, I'm not buying this. Popes don't just quit because they're tired."




Piers, you ignorant slut. NO WHERE was the reason given that 'he's tired'.


You stupid hump.

Posted by: Tami at February 11, 2013 01:19 PM (X6akg)

94 Didn't the Clinton's leave The White House with just about everything that wasn't bolted down?

Nah! Billy Jeff and Shrillary took the bolts also.

Posted by: John P. Squibob at February 11, 2013 01:19 PM (kqqGm)

95 Maybe the Pope found out he was on Obama's drone kill list and wanted to take a low profile.

Posted by: Marmo at February 11, 2013 01:19 PM (QW+AD)

96 It feels kind of like a Supreme Court justice retiring. Expect them to expire in a few months.

Posted by: polynikes at February 11, 2013 01:20 PM (m2CN7)

97 imp, under your tautology the Church officials that Michelangelo painted as demons in the 'Last Judgement' are in Hell also.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 01:20 PM (VpkjW)

98 Piers Morgan Catholic? My ass.

Posted by: rickb223 at February 11, 2013 01:20 PM (GFM2b)

99 84 This guy Benedict, not feeling the warm and fuzzies with this one. Kinda creepy.

-------

It's the zombie eye sockets.

Posted by: Assault Citizen Anachronda at February 11, 2013 01:20 PM (NmR1a)

100 :::This guy Benedict, not feeling the warm and fuzzies with this one:::

He's German.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 11, 2013 01:20 PM (nxyLn)

101 FFS the man is 85 years old and apparently has become quite frail with age- why is it a mystery that he might step down and let a younger stronger man step up as Pope?

Because the resignation of a Pope hasn't happened in something like 600 years.

It's "unprecedented".

Posted by: OregonMuse at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (9GaPd)

102 SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! breath SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM!

Posted by: Liberal American Catholics at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (RuUvx)

103
Nah! Billy Jeff and Shrillary took the bolts also.


Posted by: John P. Squibob at February 11, 2013 01:19 PM (kqqGm

President Shrillary will peel the wallpaper off the walls of the Oval Office when she leaves after eight years.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (UOM48)

104 Didn't the Clinton's leave The White House with just about everything that wasn't bolted down?
---
I just couldn't find anything sturdy enough to bolt Hilary to...

Posted by: Benny 16 at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (SO2Q8)

105 This is the oddest thing I read today: "Cardinal Dolan “Startled” by Pope Benedict XVI’s Resignation Today" http://tinyurl.com/a3g34j4



Didn't the pope just have a big meeting with the cardinals. You'd have thought he's have brought up the fact that he was thinking of retiring with them, right? So Dolan, who is really sharp, really sharp, was surprised? It makes no sense.


Piers is such a jackass. He'll say anything to stay on the air.

Posted by: Caustic at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (/b8+5)

106 I think we can be assured that the Pope's resignation announcement wasn't "His Holiness is leaving to spend more time with his family"

Posted by: kbdabear at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (mCvL4)

107 JUST for the record, if any person makes fun or insults their precious mohamad, the cradle-robber pedophile
the muslims go after with vengeance and kill them?
How about for a "loving and merciful religion".
But any ahole can insult his Holiness the Pope and be celebrated as a person of intellect, what a pile of shit!

Posted by: marcus tullius cicero at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (EAuyj)

108
Piers Morgan....skeptical about the Pope.

But *not* skeptical about Fast and Furious, Benghazi, and everything else that this Administration is lying about.

Posted by: wheatie at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (w27/Q)

109 Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (gmeXX)

Also @AllenG,
The election of a new pope is almost always a big deal because it carries with it the potential for a change in direction of the church, which has what..1.2 billion members IIRC?

So based on that, I'd say it's pretty much a big deal regardless of how it happens. The fact that he's stepping aside just makes it an even bigger deal.

Disclaimer: I'm a catholic, so I may be biased as to how much the church matters. But, I stand by it.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (oG3dE)

110
Piers Morgan ‏@piersmorgan

The Queen's a year older than The Pope. Can't see her ever resigning because she's tired. #indefatigability1infallibility0




Could the new Pope please ban idiotic hashtags? THKS


Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (kdS6q)

111 #84 Gee, I am sure the Holy Spirit will take your "warm and fuzzy feeling" into account when the Conclave meets.

Also, a black pope would be chosen from the ranks fo the African cardinals, who are more conservative and traditional than most in the West. So it would be a good thing, as far as I am concerned.

It's not like AL Sharpton would get the nod, you know.

Posted by: Miss Marple at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (GoIUi)

112 :::This guy Benedict, not feeling the warm and fuzzies with this one:::

He's German.
Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 11, 2013 01:20 PM (nxyLn)



So totally obligatory - http://youtu.be/dMkzdn2TDuI

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Team Stompy. at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (VtjlW)

113

Anna, see #92 above

It's just not kosher! (or parve or whatever)

Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (UaxA0)

114 Maybe they want to replace Classic Pope with New Pope.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (XkWWK)

115 I have little respect for people who take an a la carte approach to their faith's views, then call them selves true believers

---

It would be nice to find someone who is a hybrid of the two, but that may be impossible. Someone who could inspire like JPII with the intellectual rigor of Benedict. Both moved the Church to the "right" (used loosely) and were more orthodoxical in their leadership. I hope for a continuation of the same.

As I said in a previous post. It couldn't have been easy to follow JPII, particularly with the abuse scandal at the forefront.

I suspect the next Pope will have an easier go of it.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (gmeXX)

116 Didn't the Clinton's leave The White House with just about everything that wasn't bolted down?

Including the "W" off of every keyboard.

Posted by: jakeman, Assault V2.0 at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (96M6e)

117 O/T Megyn Kelly just teased the story of the SEAL who actually killed OBL -- from his own mouth.


Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (UOM48)

118 Actually, it's been a lifelong dream to play LB for the Ravens. I'm going for it.





Posted by: Benny 16 at February 11, 2013 01:15 PM (SO2Q


Ingest copious amounts of HGH and other hormones, go murder a couple people and you'll be a hall of famer. It's pretty simple.

Posted by: © Sponge at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (xmcEQ)

119 88 What's the Catholic position on doing the happy dance on top of little kids' graves, eh, Piers?

---

Same as for everything else....missionary

Posted by: horny Catholic at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (SO2Q8)

120 102 SCHISM!
Posted by: Liberal American Catholics at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (RuUvx)

Rhymes with...

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (XkWWK)

121 May Benedict be at peace.

Posted by: nip at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (11Tdq)

122 I can't wait for the puff of smoke. It's my favorite part. It's all so mysterious and suspenseful.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (RZ8pf)

123 SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM!
SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! breath SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM!
SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM! SCHISM!


Works for Mrs. Squibob, good little Catholic girl that she is.

Posted by: John P. Squibob at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (kqqGm)

124 Maybe the Pope found out he was on Obama's drone kill list and wanted to take a low profile.
Posted by: Marmo at February 11, 2013 01:19 PM (QW+AD)

Torrance PD mistook the Popemobile for Chris Dorner's truck.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (DrWcr)

125 I do love the hysterical flailing that's going on from people who seem to believe the man woke up this morning, called a meeting, and said, "You know, I don't think I want to be Pope anymore. It's just not my bag, baby. Give it to someone else."

Anyone who thinks this was a rash decision, and not something that was discussed and prayed over by Benedict and his inner circle for a long time, is either a fool or a Democrat. BIRM.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (4df7R)

126 "What did you know, and when did you know it?"

No way that can ever be a double-edged sword, eh, Piers?

Posted by: H. at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (+P7bM)

127 119 Posted by: horny Catholic at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (SO2Q


Ha! Thread winner nominee.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (XkWWK)

128 Is Pope Benedict in League with Space Aliens? Film at 11:00.

Posted by: Piers One at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (71LDo)

129 another Polish Pope?

Not while *I'm* God.
_

Posted by: -- GOD at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (RuUvx)

130 And the fact that it sends the liberal media in a
tizzy as they hope for a moderate Pope just brings personal satisfcation
knowing they will be let down.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:18 PM (gmeXX)

I don't know, I'm looking at the list of possible Popes I don't see many moderates in the crowd. Unless you consider using condoms in the case of AIDS victims moderate. Not sure where all of you Catholics stand on this.

Posted by: Adam Smith's Invisible Pimp Hand at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (NzBQO)

131 Will the next pope take cues from Barack Obama on social policy?
by Piers Morgan, Catholic scholar

Posted by: Media wishcasting at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (60GaT)

132 Hey, if he wants to quit let him...

But remember, people will hold this against him if he tries to run for higher office.

Posted by: jwest at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (ZDsRL)

133 .... are now whipbitching about Benedict giving up the power of the papacy????---
The liberal mind cannot conceive giving up power...

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at February 11, 2013 01:24 PM (SO2Q8)

134 Piers is such a jackass. He'll say anything to stay on the air.
Posted by: Caustic at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (/b8+5)


Catpiss, you would know all about saying anything just to get attention.

Posted by: buzzion at February 11, 2013 01:24 PM (GULKT)

135 This is the oddest thing I read today: "Cardinal
Dolan “Startled” by Pope Benedict XVI’s Resignation Today"
http://tinyurl.com/a3g34j4



Didn't the pope just have a
big meeting with the cardinals. You'd have thought he's have brought up
the fact that he was thinking of retiring with them, right? So Dolan,
who is really sharp, really sharp, was surprised? It makes no sense.


Piers is such a jackass. He'll say anything to stay on the air.

Posted by: Caustic at February 11, 2013 01:21 PM (/b8+5)

Saying you're startled is a) what you're supposed to say I think and b) doesn't imply that this particular announcement startled him. He could have been startled when the pope first told them and is merely recounting that. and C) the pope may have kept it to himself.All plausible.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:24 PM (oG3dE)

136 129 another Polish Pope?

Not while *I'm* God.
_
Posted by: -- GOD at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (RuUvx)


And just what is a Polish Primate? Sounds racist.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 11, 2013 01:24 PM (XkWWK)

137 I hope they pick someone who is much younger and I hope they don't pick a black guy, cause quite frankly I'm tired of all the "black" this and that for the last 4 years. However, I think that is exactly who they will pick, to appeal to the idiots in the Catholic church who voted for the idiot in the white house.
------
I wouldn't worry about the US version of political correctness coming from Rome.

I can't remember his name, but iirc there's a very good (and by "good" I mean orthodox) African Cardinal that could be a good person, not out of political correctness but simply because that is a growing area for the Church.

Cardinal Dolan would be teh awesome.

Posted by: Y-not at February 11, 2013 01:24 PM (5H6zj)

138 Xbox has a Dante game that has some seriously fucked up imagery. Disturbing. Cool but disturbing and fucked up.

Posted by: nip at February 11, 2013 01:24 PM (11Tdq)

139 >Our Man Piers made a comparison between the Pope and Queen Elizabeth - basically calling the Pope a pussy.



Well, Piers, Pope Benedict XVI wasn't born into royalty.


And I would argue that the Pope has a far more awesome responsibility to his followers than the Queen does to hers

also- were the Queen to become incapacitated in any way, someone can be appointed to serve in her stead- she will be Queen until the day she dies


I think comparing the Pope to the Queen is an apples/oranges type question

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (8sCoq)

140 ATC, Morgan knows this, he is just trying to get himself in the middle os a different controversy than gun control. I think he has been having trouble getting away from his gun control garbage and the killer lefty in LA.
Posted by: museisluse at February 11, 2013 01:07 PM (G4YiV)


-------------------------------------------------


This. He knows he inserted himself into something American that foreigners have absolutely no knowledge in. He only knows British mentality.

The Pope is a much more universal a subject to demean.

Posted by: Soona at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (drE9i)

141 Um..the Pope was a frail man when he assumed the office at age 78. I assume he's been told that he has only a limited time left on this earth by his doctors.
At this delicate time in Christianity's history, he doesn't want any disruptions or divisions.
He's putting his faith above himself.
What a weird guy!
He can no longer travel the world at a time that it's required of a Pope.
I'm not a Roman Catholic, but I greatly respect this man.

Posted by: Janis Ian's Award at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (D8vni)

142 Crap, I totally screwed up the cut and paste, so my comment makes no sense.

Here is what I meant to respond to:

"I hope they pick someone who is much younger and I hope they don't pick a black guy, cause quite frankly I'm tired of all the "black" this and that for the last 4 years. However, I think that is exactly who they will pick, to appeal to the idiots in the Catholic church who voted for the idiot in the white house."

---
It would be nice to find someone who is a hybrid of the two, but that may be impossible. Someone who could inspire like JPII with the intellectual rigor of Benedict. Both moved the Church to the "right" (used loosely) and were more orthodoxical in their leadership. I hope for a continuation of the same. As I said in a previous post. It couldn't have been easy to follow JPII, particularly with the abuse scandal at the forefront. I suspect the next Pope will have an easier go of it.


Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (gmeXX)

143 Plus the Queen doesn't want to step down because she doesn't want her tampon-son to assume the throne. She is hoping to outlive him or figure out a way to bump him aside for William.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (RZ8pf)

144 :::114 Maybe they want to replace Classic Pope with New Pope.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 11, 2013 01:22 PM (XkWWK)::;

Please take your comment to the pay window.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (nxyLn)

145 The Queen's a year older than The Pope. Can't see her ever resigning because she's tired. #indefatigability1infallibility0

Why do I have a feeling Piers isn't a stout monarchist? Why am I pretty sure he's one of those who'd happily call for QEII to step down and abolish the monarchy?

Piers is an insult to the few sensible Brits who still survive despite their country's desperate attempts to kill them off.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (4df7R)

146

Thing is, His Holiness Pope Benedict XIV was all about the tradition. I like that; so am I. This is a very nontraditional act coming at the heels of an abuse investigation getting shut down in Germany.

The Pope was not an abuser, I'm comfortable with that. But there are a few oddities here that suggest something's up, not least of which is that he's resigning in two weeks.

Pope's don't really have to go for the whole "two weeks notice" thing. I think they can stretch it out a bit.

Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (UaxA0)

147 #110 The Pope doesn't have to worry that he will be succeeded by Chucklehead Charles like Queen Elizabeth does.

Posted by: Miss Marple at February 11, 2013 01:26 PM (GoIUi)

148
The Queen won't step aside because Bonnie Prince Charlie would become King, and the Queen (his mum) is pretty fed up with his idiocy.

She is waiting for his oldest son to be ready to be King.

Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes.... at February 11, 2013 01:26 PM (RFeQD)

149 It really is too bad that the decrepit bastards-in-our-legislature don't follow the sensible leadership of the pope and retire.

Posted by: Fritz at February 11, 2013 01:26 PM (WM+rJ)

150 Good luck getting Glorified chump.

They don't make saints out of quitters.

Posted by: jwest at February 11, 2013 01:26 PM (ZDsRL)

151 Also in case anyone missed it earlier, best Pope tweet so far might be

"Cardinals Manager Retires"

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:26 PM (8sCoq)

152 The Queen's a year older than The Pope. Can't see her ever resigning because she's tired. #indefatigability1infallibility0

---

If the Queen abdicates, Prince Charles takes over instead of Prince William.

If I were her, I'd reign until either Charles died or William were officially named successor.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 01:27 PM (e0xKF)

153 As a Catholic, I'm not buying this

I'm getting familiar with his schtick. Left unsaid was, "Enquirer-ing minds want to know..."

Posted by: t-bird at February 11, 2013 01:27 PM (FcR7P)

154 Well, Piers, Pope Benedict XVI wasn't born into royalty.


And I would argue that the Pope has a far more awesome responsibility to his followers than the Queen does to hers

also-
were the Queen to become incapacitated in any way, someone can be
appointed to serve in her stead- she will be Queen until the day she
dies


I think comparing the Pope to the Queen is an apples/oranges type question


Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (8sCoq)

------
Stop.Reasoning.With.Rocks.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 11, 2013 01:27 PM (nELVU)

155
#124 Torrance PD mistook the Popemobile for Chris Dorner's truck.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 11, 2013 01:23 PM (DrWcr)


It's a good thing the Popemobile is bulletproof.

Posted by: Marmo at February 11, 2013 01:27 PM (QW+AD)

156 My favorite line came from Michael Savage (yes, Michael Savage) who, on the announcement that B16 well elected, commented that all of the liberal media was having a conniption fit because the College of Cardinals had the audacity to elected a Catholic as Pope.

Posted by: John P. Squibob at February 11, 2013 01:27 PM (kqqGm)

157 Benedict warned you he wouldn't be Pope for very long when he was elected to the Papacy in '05. He says he thinks it takes an energetic man to be Pope and I would have to agree. Furthermore he says he isn't that man anymore, at 85 I have no reason to doubt him.

If he feels it is his holy duty to renounce the Ministry of the Bishop of Rome so that St Peter's post may be taken by an abler man, who is any Catholic to doubt this proclamation?

>>>As a Catholic, I'm not buying this.

??? So you think his holiness is lying to you? As a Catholic, you are not buying what the Pope is telling you? Layers of stupid. Layers.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Offering Moobats Gasoline and Matches at February 11, 2013 01:27 PM (0q2P7)

158 Israel to grant Turkey access to Gaza for construction of hospital
Turkey reportedly sees permit as hint of Israel's willingness to patch up countries' bruised relations since Mavi Marmara incident; hospital set to be largest in Palestinian Territories.


Good. Another target. I am sure the Pope would agree

Posted by: Nevergiveup at February 11, 2013 01:27 PM (9Bj8R)

159 Plus the Queen doesn't want to step down because she doesn't want her tampon-son to assume the throne. She is hoping to outlive him or figure out a way to bump him aside for William.
Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (RZ8pf)


I'm pretty sure that's already been worked out behind the scenes. Chuck is too much of a flip embarrassment to ever have the throne. I'm thinking one of the caveats to letting him marry Camilla was getting his promise --- no doubt in writing -- to step aside so Wills could take the throne.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:27 PM (4df7R)

160 I don't know, I'm looking at the list of possible Popes I don't see many moderates in the crowd. Unless you consider using condoms in the case of AIDS victims moderate. Not sure where all of you Catholics stand on this.

--

I think it very unlikely for a moderate to be elected.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:27 PM (gmeXX)

161 Promote Father Guido!!!

Posted by: Tilikum the Killer Assault Whale at February 11, 2013 01:27 PM (uhftQ)

162 Damn you Aces!

Piers Morgan is a Catholic? This is terrible. I did not know this. He has to leave!

Posted by: L, elle at February 11, 2013 01:27 PM (0PiQ4)

163 >She is waiting for his oldest son to be ready to be King.

Posted by: Reader C.J. Burch writes.... at February 11, 2013 01:26 PM (RFeQD)

No- Charles won't be skipped over

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:28 PM (8sCoq)

164
147 #110 The Pope doesn't have to worry that he will be succeeded by Chucklehead Charles like Queen Elizabeth does.
Posted by: Miss Marple at February 11, 2013 01:26 PM (GoIUi)


The Pope also has more authority and responsibility in the Catholic Church than the queen does in the UK.

Posted by: buzzion at February 11, 2013 01:28 PM (GULKT)

165 Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (UaxA0)

There are several cardinals who will no longer be of voting age much after February. He may have chosen his time to avoid appearing like he was striking them out.

Also I'm imagining he's hoping for a new pope in time for easter.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:28 PM (oG3dE)

166 Lol! Charles will never be King. Short women live forever for some reason, it's gotta be the lack of height.

Posted by: Adam Smith's Invisible Pimp Hand at February 11, 2013 01:28 PM (NzBQO)

167 We got a few rocks on this thread.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 01:28 PM (VpkjW)

168 Yikes. The SEAL who shot OBL said he shot him three times in the forehead and it opening up in a "V" shape. Said the American public would not want to see the picture because it's so gruesome.

{{shudder}}

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:28 PM (UOM48)

169 Who is Presdent Obama nominating for this position and how many votes in the Senate is needed to confirm? I hope he nominates Hillary for this job , she deserves it because she is a saint for putting up with Bill's naughty little habits.........

Posted by: Mary Clogginstein from Brattleboro, Vt at February 11, 2013 01:29 PM (90aTA)

170 but your closing on this post is hilarious, Ace

Posted by: L, elle at February 11, 2013 01:29 PM (0PiQ4)

171 Also in case anyone missed it earlier, best Pope tweet so far might be

"Cardinals Manager Retires"


Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:26 PM (8sCoq)

Ha!

Posted by: Joe Mama at February 11, 2013 01:29 PM (BKLED)

172 Piers Morgan's thought process: "If we allow the Pope to resign because he feels he is no longer competent, then we might have to require that Obama resign, because he was never competent. And that wouldn't do, would it?"

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at February 11, 2013 01:29 PM (673KB)

173 I wonder if The Vatican will have to buy carbon credits from the EU before they send the ballots up the chimney?

Posted by: kbdabear at February 11, 2013 01:29 PM (mCvL4)

174 168 Yikes. The SEAL who shot OBL said he shot him three times in the forehead and it opening up in a "V" shape. Said the American public would not want to see the picture because it's so gruesome.

{{shudder}}

---

I'd want that on my targets at the range.

It must have looked like one of those aliens from The Thing by the end.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 01:29 PM (e0xKF)

175 WillBXVI's aids remove the "P" keys from all the computers on their way out the door?

Posted by: somebody else, not me at February 11, 2013 01:29 PM (nZvGM)

176 What are the odds that Baroke Owebama has asked them to hold off on naming a successor for another few years.......

Posted by: © Sponge at February 11, 2013 01:30 PM (xmcEQ)

177 Yikes. The SEAL who shot OBL said he shot him three times in the forehead and it opening up in a "V" shape. Said the American public would not want to see the picture because it's so gruesome.
{{shudder}}

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:28 PM (UOM4


I would still like to see that picture. Very much.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:30 PM (4df7R)

178 Cardinal Dolan would be teh awesome.
Posted by: Y-not at February 11, 2013 01:24 PM (5H6zj)



I still like the idea of a Jedi Pope.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Team Stompy. at February 11, 2013 01:31 PM (VtjlW)

179 But there are a few oddities here that suggest something's up, not least of which is that he's resigning in two weeks.

----

Imp, I think the short two-week period has more to do with making certain his successor is in place by Easter than anything else. Lots to do Easter week. Makes sense. Also gives the new Pope a platform to take the stage - his first Easter celebration. Having your predecessor living, if out of the public eye, does make this a unique situation.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:31 PM (gmeXX)

180 Can an unbearably smug Dan Brown novel be far behind?

Posted by: t-bird at February 11, 2013 01:31 PM (FcR7P)

181 All this talk is just papal bull.

Posted by: Insomniac at February 11, 2013 01:31 PM (DrWcr)

182
Maybehe decided to give up the Papacy for Lent.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at February 11, 2013 01:31 PM (RZ8pf)

183 If any of the black cardinals gets the nod, I await liberal head explosions when the Pope is a black African or Latin American.

Posted by: argh at February 11, 2013 01:31 PM (vaXys)

184 AlextheChick a Sith Pope.

"Apology accepted Rep. Pelosi." *thud*

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 01:31 PM (VpkjW)

185 Piers Morgan's thought process: "If we allow the Pope to resign because he feels he is no longer competent, then we might have to require that Obama resign, because he was never competent. And that wouldn't do, would it?"
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at February 11, 2013 01:29 PM (673KB)


"And YIKES! If they start expecting people to be competent at their jobs, then they might start expecting ME to draw in more viewers than late night infomercials for weight loss scams. SHIT!"

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:32 PM (4df7R)

186 178 Cardinal Dolan would be teh awesome.
Posted by: Y-not at February 11, 2013 01:24 PM (5H6zj)


I still like the idea of a Jedi Pope.

---

You don't want contraception. *hand wave* Or females in the clergy.

Posted by: Pope Ben I at February 11, 2013 01:32 PM (e0xKF)

187 Plus the Queen doesn't want to step down because she doesn't want her
tampon-son to assume the throne. She is hoping to outlive him or figure
out a way to bump him aside for William.



She may be a hologram by now. I doubt even he wants the throne.

Aaaand that's the entirety of my life's writing about the royals.

Posted by: eleven at February 11, 2013 01:32 PM (KXm42)

188 I don't want a new pope. I want my Ratzinger to stay.

Posted by: L, elle at February 11, 2013 01:32 PM (0PiQ4)

189

Piers' Peers Breaking News: Pope Seen Talking To Tea Party'ers Christians.

Posted by: beach drizzle at February 11, 2013 01:32 PM (LpQbZ)

190 I still like the idea of a Jedi Pope.

"I find your lack of faith...disturbing."

Posted by: Insomniac at February 11, 2013 01:32 PM (DrWcr)

191
177 Yikes. The SEAL who shot OBL said he shot him three times in the forehead and it opening up in a "V" shape. Said the American public would not want to see the picture because it's so gruesome. {{shudder}} Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:28 PM (UOM4 I would still like to see that picture. Very much.
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:30 PM (4df7R)


I don't want to see the picture. But tough shit for him. The photo should be available for anyone who wants to see it. He's wrong and so are a bunch of others, especially fuckstick Obama.

Posted by: buzzion at February 11, 2013 01:32 PM (GULKT)

192 180
Can an unbearably smug Dan Brown novel be far behind?

Posted by: t-bird at February 11, 2013 01:31 PM (FcR7P

Followed by the inevitable film starring the unbearably smug Tom Hanks.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:32 PM (UOM48)

193 This Catholic porn star is suing Pierce Morgan!

Posted by: Pierced Organ at February 11, 2013 01:33 PM (ypzqs)

194
Quick...... Sebelius...... push that contraception mandate through while their leaderless!!!!!

Posted by: Brack Owe Bama at February 11, 2013 01:33 PM (nELVU)

195 Piers Morgan is to Catholicism what Noam Chomsky is to Judaism.

Schism:Jism

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 11, 2013 01:33 PM (XkWWK)

196
Rumours are swirling that a Canadian could take over as the new leader of the Catholic Church following Pope Benedict XVI’s surprise resignation. Oddsmakers have pegged Cardinal Marc Ouellet, the former archbishop of Quebec, as one of the frontrunners to succeed Benedict.





Whoa whoa now. A Canadian? Let's not do anything crazy.

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at February 11, 2013 01:33 PM (kdS6q)

197
"I haven't seen the type of funeral a retired Pope gets, but if it isn't
as good as a sitting Pope, he's giving up one kick-ass sendoff."

Will he make off with the big giant gavel? Oh wait, that was Pelosi, that other devout Catholic!

Posted by: Piers One at February 11, 2013 01:33 PM (71LDo)

198 "Apology accepted Rep. Pelosi." *thud*

Okay, if the Pope would really force-choke Pelosi, I would totally convert to Catholicism.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 01:33 PM (8y9MW)

199 Followed by the inevitable film starring the unbearably smug Tom Hanks.
---

Worse, The Godfather 4

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:33 PM (gmeXX)

200 Cardinal Dolan would be teh awesome. Posted by: Y-not at February 11, 2013 01:24 PM (5H6zj)

No, he wouldn't. Not unless you want the entire worldwide Church co-opted by the Democrat party and not just the US.

Posted by: somebody else, not me at February 11, 2013 01:34 PM (nZvGM)

201 Yikes. The SEAL who shot OBL said he shot him three times in the forehead and it opening up in a "V" shape. Said the American public would not want to see the picture because it's so gruesome.

{{shudder}}
Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:28 PM (UOM4
--------------------------------------------------------
If a SEAL says it's gruesome you know it is. I have seen what they do to fish. Most of the time they just bite their heads off and eat them whole. The crunching sound is sickening.

Posted by: Truck Monkey at February 11, 2013 01:34 PM (jucos)

202 I heard an on the streetinterview with a liberal stating that the pope was retiring because the Catholic church needed to change, and the pope obviously didn't feel that he was up to making those changes. Yeah, the interviewee actually said that.

Posted by: JustLikeDavidHasselhoff at February 11, 2013 01:34 PM (wWZWw)

203 151 Also in case anyone missed it earlier, best Pope tweet so far might be

"Cardinals Manager Retires"
Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:26 PM (8sCoq)

LaRussa or "The White Rat?"

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at February 11, 2013 01:34 PM (XkWWK)

204 >\ Said the American public would not want to see the picture because it's so gruesome.


BS- that scumbag killed 3000 of my people. I want to gaze upon his bullet-riddled lifeless form.

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:35 PM (8sCoq)

205 Average age of all popes elected since 1400 is 62.39 years. Benedict XVI was 78 years & 3 days old when elected. Here's an idea, elect someone in his 30's or 40's. He'll be around for awhile.
If you are going to claim that he needs to have experience, that's what advisers are for. If, at 78, he has experience, what does he need advisers for?
Serious question.

Posted by: rickb223 at February 11, 2013 01:35 PM (GFM2b)

206 I just thought of another possiblility --- The Pope isn't Catholic.

Posted by: Soona at February 11, 2013 01:35 PM (drE9i)

207 So Peirs, who claims to be British and Catholic, just took shots at the Queen and the Pope. What is his immigration status, exactly?

Posted by: Jean at February 11, 2013 01:35 PM (Io7hX)

208 Hey, I'm Catholic! President Obama should appoint me Pope!

Posted by: Joe Biden at February 11, 2013 01:35 PM (DrWcr)

209 180 Can an unbearably smug and poorly written Dan Brown novel be far behind?
Posted by: t-bird at February 11, 2013 01:31 PM (FcR7P)

FIFY

Posted by: chique d'afrique on her phone at February 11, 2013 01:36 PM (6zgse)

210 >Whoa whoa now. A Canadian? Let's not do anything crazy.


Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at February 11, 2013 01:33 PM (kdS6q)

Go in peace, eh.

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:36 PM (8sCoq)

211 The amount of hatred the Catholic Church receives from both the right and left is disgusting.

--

I think the vast majority comes from the left.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:36 PM (gmeXX)

212 Piers Morgan: Fucking Clownboy Extraordinaire

Posted by: DangerGirl - Stop this thing, I want off at February 11, 2013 01:36 PM (EYfcP)

213 I hope our next pope will recognize that being a woman is not a preexisting condition.

Posted by: Nancy Pelosi, Orthodox Catholic at February 11, 2013 01:36 PM (60GaT)

214 I just thought of another possiblility --- The Pope isn't Catholic.
Posted by: Soona at February 11, 2013 01:35 PM (drE9i)

And I don't crap in the woods, either.

Posted by: Bear at February 11, 2013 01:36 PM (DrWcr)

215 Rickb223, shhhh. We don't want Obama pulling that with the SCOTUS

Posted by: Jean at February 11, 2013 01:36 PM (Io7hX)

216 Clearly, radical Papists are forcing the removal of this pope so they can install an Assault Pope.

Posted by: Underground Vulgarian at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (7PqWL)

217 It is not just Piers it is many Catholics, like myself included. Didn't you see that Soldad O'Brien agreed with Piers too?? She isn't an English Catholic but a real Spanish one so it's not just a liberal thing if that is what you were implying. I think I saw her doing the rosary in an outtake they showed so she probably believes all that stuff too like me.

Posted by: Theresa at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (oYXGc)

218 Cannot wait to see how Piers Morgan ties the Pope's retirement to gun control.

Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (BvTwT)

219 Followed by the inevitable film starring the unbearably smug (and no longer funny at all) Tom Hanks. FIFY

Posted by: Piers One at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (71LDo)

220 Posted by: somebody else, not me at February 11, 2013 01:34 PM (nZvGM

Dolan's family is in my parish. From what I have heard/can tell, he's not as liberal as people tend to think he is.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (oG3dE)

221 Okay, if the Pope would really force-choke Pelosi, I would totally convert to Catholicism.


Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 01:33 PM (8y9MW)

This universe, I want to live in it.

Posted by: Adam Smith's Invisible Pimp Hand at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (NzBQO)

222 Here's an idea, elect someone in his 30's or 40's. He'll be around for awhile.

---

This cuts both ways.

If he sucks, then you're still stuck with him for another 30-40 years unless he dies or is forcibly removed, with the latter not being done in about as long as a resignation.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (e0xKF)

223 211

yeah referring to anti-Catholic sentiment from the right seems outdated. still exists, just not in the way it did in the past.

Posted by: JDP at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (60GaT)

224 So totally obligatory - http://youtu.be/dMkzdn2TDuI


Don't tell me: a Downfall parody where Hitler learns that the Pope is stepping down?

(I'm going to hell, aren't I?)

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (8y9MW)

225 I just got tired of shitting in the woods.

Posted by: Ben XVI at February 11, 2013 01:38 PM (FcR7P)

226 Pick on me all you want MissMarple, but I think the fact that John Paul was such a personable guy led to his great popularity with people other than just Catholics.

As one comment said it's the zombie eye sockets, yup that's it. He's creepy and doesn't project warmth to those of us who aren't Catholic and quite frankly laugh at the wishy washy following of therules of faithby the Catholics over the last 40 plus years.

Even though I wasn't Catholic I still sent my sonto Catholic school K-8 and I have respect for the church and any churches (other than Islam)where the leaders who can get their message and/or personality across to the masses, it's very effective.

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 01:38 PM (9U1OG)

227 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Trinity_Blood_characters

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 01:38 PM (VpkjW)

228 Posted by: Theresa at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (oYXGc)

Can't tell if troll.......

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:38 PM (oG3dE)

229 (I'm going to hell, aren't I?)

---

Yep, and we're all comin' with you.

Posted by: Dr. Denis Leary at February 11, 2013 01:38 PM (e0xKF)

230 Average age of all popes elected since 1400 is 62.39 years. Benedict XVI was 78 years 3 days old when elected. Here's an idea, elect someone in his 30's or 40's. He'll be around for awhile.

40's or 50's I could see, but 30's strikes me as very young. That's not to say that there aren't any Catholics in their 30s who would make excellent Popes, but I DO think any candidate would need a little more life experience under his belt; the Papacy is a very tough job. Heck, in modern America a 30 year old Catholic may conceivably have just gotten off his parents' health insurance four years earlier.

But, again, not a Catholic. That's just my thought process.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:38 PM (4df7R)

231 Short women live forever for some reason, it's gotta be the lack of height.
Posted by: Adam Smith's Invisible Pimp Hand at February 11, 2013 01:28 PM (NzBQO)



Respect, bitches.

As far as Her Royal BAMFness, I fully believe she is damn well determined to live past Charles to make sure he never even thinks about maybe possibly some day being King. That being said, I do agree that the whole marrying Camilla thing had a major so you'll abdicate for Wills string attached to it. My current working theory is that once Kate has the baby then the Queen will step aside, Charles will step aside and William will ascend to the throne. Remember, the laws of succession were very quietly changed last year to make it that their first born, whether male or female, would be the next in line. Thus there's no needing to wait for a male heir now.


Dude. Thinking about this stuff is better then thinking about real important crap. I can see why the LIVs make that choice.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Team Stompy. at February 11, 2013 01:39 PM (VtjlW)

232 Yikes. The SEAL who shot OBL said he shot him three times in the forehead and it opening up in a "V" shape. Said the American public would not want to see the picture because it's so gruesome.{{shudder}}
Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:28 PM (UOM4

We got to see both of Saddam's sons who were shot way more than 3 times. I look at conspiracy theories with a jaded eye but that doesn't mean they don't exist in some manner. Not having any photos released and the quick burial at sea does nothing but raise suspicions.

Posted by: polynikes at February 11, 2013 01:39 PM (m2CN7)

233 First of all, Morgan is in the MFM. Secondly, he's English. Those two facts make his "knowledge" of the Catholic Church and its hierarchy (to say nothing of its theology) less than useless.

Pope Benedict is a man of staggering intellect. I guarantee you he didn't pull this idea out of his ass. I'm sure he realizes the drift there was in the Church during John Paul II's long decline and he wishes to spare both himself and the Church that.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 11, 2013 01:39 PM (zF6Iw)

234 >>Benedict XVI was 78 years & 3 days old when elected.

When Benedict was selected, I assumed his age was a feature, not a bug. I think it was intended as a reset after JPII. It was a chance to have a cerebral, reflective period following the charismatic papacy of JPII.

Posted by: Y-not at February 11, 2013 01:39 PM (5H6zj)

235 Carnival Barker knows that making controversial statemenets will be repeated on blogs and will garner him more attention/viewers.
I think that it is time we stop.

Posted by: Cheri at February 11, 2013 01:39 PM (G+Wff)

236 I'm not Catholic.

That said, I've seen this Pope do some positive things, and make what seemed to be good decisions with rational explanations.

I factor that into the Pope's voluntary resignation.

Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 11, 2013 01:39 PM (Qxe/p)

237 So now the Vice-Pope takes over right? Who's number two, Jesus?

Posted by: ml at February 11, 2013 01:40 PM (iEoiA)

238 As one comment said it's the zombie eye sockets, yup that's it. He's creepy and doesn't project warmth to those of us who aren't Catholic and quite frankly laugh at the wishy washy following of therules of faithby the Catholics over the last 40 plus years.---
If i recall correctly, he was recently voted the 11th funniest German of all time...

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at February 11, 2013 01:40 PM (SO2Q8)

239
205 Average age of all popes elected since 1400 is 62.39 years. Benedict XVI was 78 years 3 days old when elected. Here's an idea, elect someone in his 30's or 40's. He'll be around for awhile. If you are going to claim that he needs to have experience, that's what advisers are for. If, at 78, he has experience, what does he need advisers for? Serious question.
Posted by: rickb223 at February 11, 2013 01:35 PM (GFM2b)


I've heard some speculation that they probably won't elect another pope as young as John Paul II was for sometime. 62.39 years back in the 1400's probably wasn't much of a life left to live either. I think a better look would be the average length of time Pope's served since the 1400's

Posted by: buzzion at February 11, 2013 01:40 PM (GULKT)

240 Fire doesn't melt popes.

Posted by: The Mega Independent at February 11, 2013 01:40 PM (YZqSb)

241 Posted by: Theresa at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (oYXGc)


Can't tell if troll.......


Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:38 PM (oG3dE)



Ditto... That hashtag looks familiar...

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:40 PM (4df7R)

242 We got to see both of Saddam's sons who were shot way more than 3 times. I

One of them took a TOW to the face too.

Posted by: EC at February 11, 2013 01:40 PM (GQ8sn)

243 Jaimo - I don't think there is any doubt that JPII was more personable. He was the rock star Pope, so to speak. I liked him of course, but many prefer the style of Benedict. I think they were both great and just hope for a 3rd great one.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:40 PM (gmeXX)

244 I heard an on the streetinterview with a liberal stating that the pope
was retiring because the Catholic church needed to change, and the pope
obviously didn't feel that he was up to making those changes. Yeah, the
interviewee actually said that.


And with that, here comes the punchline from the Cheech and Chong skit:

And she's gotta hava bigga tits!

Posted by: John P. Squibob at February 11, 2013 01:41 PM (kqqGm)

245 40's or 50's I could see, but 30's strikes me as
very young. That's not to say that there aren't any Catholics in their
30s who would make excellent Popes, but I DO think any candidate would
need a little more life experience under his belt; the Papacy is a very
tough job. Heck, in modern America a 30 year old Catholic may
conceivably have just gotten off his parents' health insurance four
years earlier.



But, again, not a Catholic. That's just my thought process.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:38 PM (4df7R)

As I understand it, after JP2, there really isn't much clamoring for a long term pope again.The church doesn't think like the supreme court, and try to pick people for the long haul, there really is some thinking that popes should be old, wise, and live for 30 years.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:41 PM (oG3dE)

246 My prediction is that the next Pope will be from South America.

Posted by: polynikes at February 11, 2013 01:41 PM (m2CN7)

247 Cardinal Dolan is a scream. He could do an hour of standup before mass each Sunday.

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 01:41 PM (9U1OG)

248 No, he wouldn't. Not unless you want the entire worldwide Church co-opted by the Democrat party and not just the US.
Posted by: somebody else, not me at February 11, 2013 01:34 PM
----
Not sure what you're basing this on. He's considered to be a theologically conservative cardinal.

Posted by: Y-not at February 11, 2013 01:42 PM (5H6zj)

249 Lots of interesting stuff going on. Prophesy from St. Malachy says that Benedict is the last Pope before the return of Peter. Lots of unpleasant stuff (think "revelationy") might happen before then.

As for Piers Morgan being Catholic, I think many (Nancy Pelosi/ John Kerry) just roll that out when it's *convenient* but really, it means less than their Netflix membership.

Posted by: shibumi at February 11, 2013 01:42 PM (z63Tr)

250 The Pope isn't Catholic

Works for me.

Posted by: Non Flatuent Dog at February 11, 2013 01:42 PM (kqqGm)

251 We got to see both of Saddam's sons who were shot way more than 3 times.

And we got to see Khaddafi's ass!

Posted by: The Mo Bros at February 11, 2013 01:43 PM (FcR7P)

252 As a Protestant, I'm completely confused by Pope-related stuff, but I have often wondered about this: How can professed Catholic politicians like Pelosi and Kerry and Cuomo, who publicly (and even vociferously) advocate and argue for abortion and other policies, programs and legislation completely antithetical to Church teaching, still be Catholic?

Please understand: I don't mean to insult or intrude upon your religion or anything disrespectful. I'm genuinely curious.

Posted by: troyriser at February 11, 2013 01:43 PM (vtiE6)

253 what's he know about the asteroid and when did he know it?

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at February 11, 2013 01:43 PM (RZ8pf)

254 The Pope isn't Catholic

Works for me.


I'm good with it.

Posted by: Undefecating Urso at February 11, 2013 01:43 PM (kqqGm)

255 [iAs far as Her Royal BAMFness, I fully believe she is damn well determined to live past Charles to make sure he never even thinks about maybe possibly some day being King. That being said, I do agree that the whole marrying Camilla thing had a major so you'll abdicate for Wills string attached to it. My current working theory is that once Kate has the baby then the Queen will step aside, Charles will step aside and William will ascend to the throne. Remember, the laws of succession were very quietly changed last year to make it that their first born, whether male or female, would be the next in line. Thus there's no needing to wait for a male heir now.

This, because AtC says things much better than I can.

I'd also add that QEII wants to reign longer than Victoria. She's got about two more years to go before she matches the latter's 63 years on the throne.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:43 PM (4df7R)

256 Don't tell me: a Downfall parody where Hitler learns that the Pope is stepping down?

(I'm going to hell, aren't I?)
Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (8y9MW)



Not even close, it's the Simpsons The Bart The clip.


You know, I'd love to see a South American Pope. I think the Vatican could use a little Santeria added to it.


Yes, yes, I denounce myself.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Team Stompy. at February 11, 2013 01:44 PM (VtjlW)

257 Yea, but I have a dear friend who is a meek little woman who more Catholic than most priests I know just absolutely loved John Paul II. She even spent 4 years working on a cross stitch portrait of the man (it's spectacular) and has it hanging in her living room, she just finished Mother Theresa. She talks about JPII like he's still here and how he was the best thing since the resurrection.

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 01:44 PM (9U1OG)

258 Bambi won the Peace Prize, why not make him Pope?

Posted by: The Mega Independent at February 11, 2013 01:44 PM (YZqSb)

259 222 Here's an idea, elect someone in his 30's or 40's. He'll be around for awhile.
That's the right idea. Reach down into the ranks and pick out some 30 something charismatic priest and claim everyone came to the same conclusion at once - inspired by God.

Pump up the brand and bring in the utes. Pound the populist message and dabble on the edge of politics.

In about 4 years, the Illuminati can take this guy out, but the increase in church goers would remain for decades.

Posted by: jwest at February 11, 2013 01:44 PM (ZDsRL)

260 No 30 or 40 sounds too young. Men that age have a lot of responsibilities especially if their kids are not even teens yet. Not that the wife would not help out (that would be her traditional roll in the church) but they can be a handful. Also, Popes know a lot of languages besides Latin and Italian and you have to go around the world a few times to get the hang of it.

Posted by: Theresa at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (oYXGc)

261 Okay, if the Pope would really force-choke Pelosi, I would totally convert to Catholicism.




Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 01:33 PM (8y9MW)

This universe, I want to live in it.


[Pope listens to Pelosi talk about the theological beliefs of abortion.]
"I find your lack of faith....disturbing"

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Offering Moobats Gasoline and Matches at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (0q2P7)

262 Just as JP II hastened the fall of the iron curtain, I can see a liberal one world latino pope trying to push an Obamaesque agenda.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (l86i3)

263 This is how the media operates: As a Republican I can basically say anything about being a Republican, even if I haven't voted for a Republican in 6 elections nor endorsed a Republican in that same time. Still I'm a Republican.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (gmeXX)

264 As a catholic, who went to catholic school, with nuns, I don't recall them ever saying Pope was a job you could quit. They taught that preisthood, and I assume by default "Popehood" was not a divorcable relationship. So I admit - even though I later became an agnostic, I don't see where he has the right to quit. Seems like the resignation letter is undeliverable to other dimensions.

Posted by: Whatev at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (A7Wh1)

265 I'm not a Catholic, but I did stay at an Holiday Inn Express last night.

Posted by: Soona at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (drE9i)

266 Lots of unpleasant stuff (think "revelationy") might happen before then.

----

Well.... it better hurry up. End of February and we have Revelations 3 thorough 15 to get through.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (nELVU)

267 The most shocking thing about that tweet is Piers Morgan claiming to be Catholic. Maybe he is Catholic like that SNL chick who does the atheist commercials. A priest friend of mine said he, "...wondered how much JP II's long illness played a role in Benedict's decision? He was close
to the late pontiff and watched the media use JPII's health to
frequently usurp his message. It's humbling of him to not want that to
happen again."

Posted by: no good deed at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (mjR67)

268 . I think a better look would be the average length of time Pope's served since the 1400's

---

Average time of reign in the past 100 years or so is around 12 years.

Posted by: Dr. Denis Leary at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (e0xKF)

269 The next pope will be from the rural south .
Pope Bubba I .

Posted by: awkward davies at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (USjX1)

270 Please understand: I don't mean to insult or intrude upon your religion or anything disrespectful. I'm genuinely curious.
----
I miss the days of public excommunications. Heck, how about a good ole interdict?

Posted by: Medievil Buzzsaw90 at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (SO2Q8)

271 OK, Theresa is definitely a parody.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (RZ8pf)

272 The Church is trying to very discreetly say that he has dementia

#4. Started referring to the papal beanie as "My Precious".

Posted by: DaveA (so going to hell for a Top 10 joke) at February 11, 2013 01:46 PM (JJdOG)

273 So now the Vice-Pope takes over right? Who's number two, Jesus?
Posted by: ml at February 11, 2013 01:40 PM (iEoiA)

I'm in charge, here at the Vatican.

Posted by: Al Haig at February 11, 2013 01:46 PM (nZvGM)

274 Here's the link to the Esquire interview with the SEAL who killed bin Laden:

http://tinyurl.com/ct4yu69

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:46 PM (UOM48)

275 Stay on this story, boys!

I'm gonna get the scoop on this conspiracy if it harelips ever'body in Vatican City!

Posted by: Piers Morgan at February 11, 2013 01:46 PM (WM+rJ)

276 >>>Here's an idea, elect someone in his 30's or 40's.

It's a big complex organization. Someone in their 30's is not likely to have the wisdom, experience, or restraint to lead it well. Late 40's would be pushing it.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Offering Moobats Gasoline and Matches at February 11, 2013 01:46 PM (0q2P7)

277 The next pope will be from the rural south .
Pope Bubba I .
Posted by: awkward davies at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (USjX1)

We should all be so lucky. Then again, Tomothy Dolan isn't real far off.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 01:46 PM (l86i3)

278 252
As a Protestant, I'm completely confused by Pope-related stuff, but I
have often wondered about this: How can professed Catholic politicians
like Pelosi and Kerry and Cuomo, who publicly (and even vociferously)
advocate and argue for abortion and other policies, programs and
legislation completely antithetical to Church teaching, still be
Catholic?



Please understand: I don't mean to insult or intrude upon your religion or anything disrespectful. I'm genuinely curious.
xxx

"Catholic in Name Only." Not considered real Catholics by real Catholics. As a Catholic, I'm surprised that these people are not excommunicated, but really, I think the Church overall hopes that *some day* these politicians will return to the Church and do positive things.

Posted by: shibumi at February 11, 2013 01:46 PM (z63Tr)

279 How can professed Catholic politicians like Pelosi and Kerry and Cuomo, who publicly (and even vociferously) advocate and argue for abortion and other policies, programs and legislation completely antithetical to Church teaching, still be Catholic?

Some people think of Catholicism as a cultural thing - you go to Church for a few big events. They aren't crazy about the religious aspects but dammit, it's *their* heritage and they are going to voice their opinion!

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at February 11, 2013 01:46 PM (49lPc)

280 Jaimo - I don't think there is any doubt that JPII
was more personable. He was the rock star Pope, so to speak. I liked him
of course, but many prefer the style of Benedict. I think they were
both great and just hope for a 3rd great one.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:40 PM (gmeXX)

I've heard it said "They came to See JP2, they come to hear Benedict."I think it's accurate, and telling. Not that JP2 was bad, he was a great pope, perfect for the time. But the church needed (and still needs) something different I think.I'd be curious to see if there were drops in church members anywhere after JP2 (my guess would be yes, especially in places like the US.) We need something more lasting than his charisma could provide.Also once heard "God Blesses us, it's been more than 500 years since we had a wicked pope!" True, and I hope it continues.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:46 PM (oG3dE)

281 I can't remember his name, but iirc there's a very good (and by "good" I mean orthodox) African Cardinal that could be a good person, not out of political correctness but simply because that is a growing area for the Church.

Cardinal Arinze, I believe.

Cardinal Dolan would be teh awesome.

The one thing the Curia will never do is pick an American pope. It puts the Chair of Peter into the hands of a man who belongs to the preeminent superpower andopens a wholepolitico-religious can or worms. Also, Rome is deeply suspicious of and antagonistic to, what they consider the "American" Church.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 11, 2013 01:46 PM (zF6Iw)

282 Men that age have a lot of responsibilities especially if their kids are not even teens yet.

Did the Catholic Church start letting priests marry while I wasn't looking?

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (8y9MW)

283 252

Catholicism seems to, in a looser sense (i.e. not ethnically obviously,) be sort of like Judaism in the sense that some people feel an attachment to the Church even when they disagree with a bunch of it.

Cuomo's dad tried to square the circle with "personally opposed to abortion" but that's sorta paper-thin obviously

Posted by: JDP at February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (60GaT)

284 Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:24 PM (oG3dE)

Oh, sorry I wasn't clear. I was under the impression that we were going to help piers craft his "Papal Conspiracy Show" and that would be just like he would say it.

Posted by: Caustic at February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (/b8+5)

285 Pope's don't really have to go for the whole "two weeks notice" thing. I think they can stretch it out a bit.


Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (UaxA0)


It's Italian law. He has to give two weeks notice, or forgo his unemployment benefits.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (673KB)

286
252 As a Protestant, I'm completely confused by Pope-related stuff, but I have often wondered about this: How can professed Catholic politicians like Pelosi and Kerry and Cuomo, who publicly (and even vociferously) advocate and argue for abortion and other policies, programs and legislation completely antithetical to Church teaching, still be Catholic? Please understand: I don't mean to insult or intrude upon your religion or anything disrespectful. I'm genuinely curious.
Posted by: troyriser at February 11, 2013 01:43 PM (vtiE6)


They claim the "I'm personally against abortion, but I can't force my personal beliefs on those that I serve." In other words they're full of shit. And they should probably be excommunicated. But not up to me.

Posted by: buzzion at February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (GULKT)

287 252
As a Protestant, I'm completely confused by Pope-related stuff, but I
have often wondered about this: How can professed Catholic politicians
like Pelosi and Kerry and Cuomo, who publicly (and even vociferously)
advocate and argue for abortion and other policies, programs and
legislation completely antithetical to Church teaching, still be
Catholic?

---

Hell... Im trying to figure out how they still are American??

Posted by: fixerupper at February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (nELVU)

288 #226 Pope Benedict was a teacher, and that was his greatest value to the Church, followed closely by his love and promotion of classical liturgical music.

I realize in this television age looks are uber-important, but really, you need to stop and look at what you are posting.

1. You aren't Catholic but are presuming to tell Catholics (and particularly Cardinals) what sort of pope should be chosen.
2. You fail to realize that Pope Benedict was one who was re-instituting many of the pre-Vatican II practices, like the Latin Mass, as well as standing against secularization of the Church.
3. I am not picking on you, but you have left yourself open to criticism by your ill-informed comments.

Posted by: Miss Marple at February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (GoIUi)

289 I could pope better than any Catholic.

Posted by: SCoaMF at February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (eHIJJ)

290
Okay, if the Pope would really force-choke Pelosi, I would totally convert to Catholicism.

Me too. Just think of how an audience with him would go...

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit. at February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (+z4pE)

291 Pope needed time off to answer some really big questions like: "Does Piers Morgan sh** in the woods?

Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at February 11, 2013 01:48 PM (n8LUb)

292 MOH ceremony on TV-FOX

Posted by: Nevergiveup at February 11, 2013 01:48 PM (9Bj8R)

293 251 We got to see both of Saddam's sons who were shot way more than 3 times.

And we got to see Khaddafi's ass!
Posted by: The Mo Bros at February 11, 2013 01:43 PM (FcR7P)

Hell, we had to look at Ambassador Stevens post-sodomy. After that, I look forward to the National Collectors Mint commemorative run of the $50 gold Bin Laden Headshot coin, clad in 14 mg of pure gold. National Collector's Mint's private nonmonetary minting recreates Osama bin Laden's gaping fatal headwounds.
The final issue price was to be set at $50 per proof, but during our special release, this 24k pure gold clad masterpiece can be yours for only $9.95.

Posted by: Underground Vulgarian at February 11, 2013 01:48 PM (7PqWL)

294 if Piers is a Catholic then I'm a small black-and-tan schnauzer with a drinking problem and a gimpy right foreleg.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:48 PM (4df7R)

295 Um, wtf? The Pope didn't phone Piers and tell him why he was stepping aside? Seriously? What the hell...... doesn't the Pope realize how important the lefty media here in the U.S. is?...... I'm shocked.

Posted by: Some Guy in Wisconsin at February 11, 2013 01:48 PM (XMizE)

296 ...
How can professed Catholic politicians like Pelosi and Kerry and Cuomo, who publicly (and even vociferously) advocate and argue for abortion and other policies, programs and legislation completely antithetical to Church teaching, still be Catholic?
...
Posted by: troyriser at February 11, 2013 01:43 PM (vtiE6)


Was it the Pope who stated they shouldn't be considered Catholic and might be liable to excommunication?

I remember that view expressed, but I don't remember the source.
If it was a Bishop -- that probably came sourced from the Pope.
I developed a bit of respect at that point, anyway.

Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 11, 2013 01:48 PM (Qxe/p)

297 Saw a Geerman comedian once. Dude was funny as hell.


"People have ze mizconceptzion zat Germans are obssesed viss order and rules. I azzure you zis iss completely false.

Now.....joke numba one......"

Posted by: eleven at February 11, 2013 01:49 PM (KXm42)

298 Gotta mute the TV. Barry's about to desecrate the Medal of Honor and look down his nose at SSG Romesha.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:49 PM (UOM48)

299 what do we call the pope when he's no longer pope?

Posted by: phoenixgirl at February 11, 2013 01:49 PM (GVxQo)

300 Very true, it would be a cold day in hell when they give an American Cardinal the job. It's too bad.

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 01:49 PM (9U1OG)

301 CINOs and JINOs. Notice neither faith kills the apostates. Now a MINO will get killed if caught.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 01:49 PM (VpkjW)

302 285 Pope's don't really have to go for the whole "two weeks notice" thing. I think they can stretch it out a bit.


Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 01:25 PM (UaxA0)


It's Italian law. He has to give two weeks notice, or forgo his unemployment benefits.

---

At least elections aren't under Italian law. If that were the case, there would be a coalition government putting a Pope into power ever six months, or longer if someone had some bunga-bunga time.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 01:49 PM (e0xKF)

303 289 I could pope better than any Catholic.
Posted by: SCoaMF at February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (eHIJJ)

Pope it like it's hot.
Pope it like it's hot.
Pope it like it's hot.

Posted by: Snoop Popey Pope at February 11, 2013 01:50 PM (7PqWL)

304 MOH ceremony on TV-FOX

Do you get to request that W present the award to you?

Posted by: t-bird at February 11, 2013 01:50 PM (FcR7P)

305 299 what do we call the pope when he's no longer pope?

---

Pope Emeritus?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 01:50 PM (e0xKF)

306
Pelosi, Kerry et al are defacto excommunicated.
Anyone who receives the Body and the Blood while not in a state of grace is wasting their time.
I would be very happy to have them excommunicated as an example to unrepentant Catholics living in and promoting scism.
I can only guess that if excommunications were begun, we wouldn't know when or where to stop.
If I had to guess what my Monsignor thinks, I would guess him to be unwilling to give up hope on the lapsed.
Just a guess.

Posted by: Justamom of the LiB camp at February 11, 2013 01:50 PM (Sptt8)

307 Piers Morgan, "Tonight on my show, the burning question of the day: Is the Pope Catholic?"

Posted by: theCork at February 11, 2013 01:50 PM (SeHfs)

308 Did the Catholic Church start letting priests marry while I wasn't looking?
Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (8y9MW)


As I understand it, you don't HAVE to be a priest to become Pope. You just have to be a good Catholic.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 01:50 PM (4df7R)

309 Lots of interesting stuff going on. Prophesy from St. Malachy says that
Benedict is the last Pope before the return of Peter. Lots of unpleasant
stuff (think "revelationy") might happen before then.


Was that the guy buried with a metal plate that was found inscribed with the date of his exhumation when it happened?

I remember reading when I was much younger that there were only three Popes to go on the list, but I couldn't remember if that included John Paul the second.

Posted by: Methos at February 11, 2013 01:50 PM (hO9ad)

310 Posted by: Theresa at February 11, 2013 01:37 PM (oYXGc)

Posted by: Average Joe at January 22, 2013 02:30 PM (oYXGc)

Posted by: buzzion at February 11, 2013 01:50 PM (GULKT)

311 Do they have the name of the next Pope already selected? Does the selected Pope get to make that call?

I would like Pope Dewayne Alonzo Camacho the II

Adding Mountain Dew would be too much.

Posted by: polynikes at February 11, 2013 01:50 PM (m2CN7)

312 Did the Catholic Church start letting priests marry while I wasn't looking?


Posted by: at AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channeling Breitbart February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (8y9MW) In reaching out towards the Episcopal Church and the Eastern Churches I think he offered them the ability to join the Catholic clergy even if they are married with children. But, no marriage and no kids if you come up through the regular channels, ie ordination as a Catholic Priest.

Posted by: Caustic at February 11, 2013 01:50 PM (/b8+5)

313 OK, Theresa is definitely a parody.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (RZ8pf)

But not even a good Parody.
@Whatev,It's in there in Cannon law, it's just so rarely used people don't talk about it much. Especially considering that anyone born past 1978 will only remember 2, maybe 3 popes. JPI (maybe) JP2, and Benedict. It's almost as though people haven't thought much about papal transitions.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:51 PM (oG3dE)

314 Do you get to request that W present the award to you?
Posted by: t-bird at February 11, 2013 01:50 PM (FcR7P)


I don't "Think" you have any say in the matter, but I could be wrong. In recent times, The President always presents it

Posted by: Nevergiveup at February 11, 2013 01:51 PM (9Bj8R)

315 So I admit - even though I later became an agnostic, I don't see where he has the right to quit. Seems like the resignation letter is undeliverable to other dimensions.
---
there are multiple historical precedents.
Basically the Pope makes the rules.
If he wants to revise the election process, he can
If he wants to name a sucessor, he can.
If he wants to make the next Pope selection based on a singing competition he can
His authority is complete.

Posted by: Medievil Buzzsaw90 at February 11, 2013 01:51 PM (SO2Q8)

316 My prediction is that the next Pope will be from South America.


It's like the Pope World Cup.

Posted by: eleven at February 11, 2013 01:51 PM (KXm42)

317 Trsblke -- JPII's role in helping to defeat Communism alone is great, but he did many other things. Hard to tell if there was any decline in membership after him, but since it corresponded with the scandal, it would be difficult to tell.

From my experience in Houston, since Benedict and the election of Cardinal Dinardo, church membership has gone up, masses seem to have a lot more people. You also see a lot more younger members. Of course this may simply be observational bias.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 01:51 PM (gmeXX)

318 Short answer to Pelosi et al remaining Catholic....

People aren't publicly excommunicated anymore. If you are partaking in mortal sin, such as supporting abortion in any way, you are de facto excommunicated. It's your obligation, however to refuse communion. If you don't do so, you're drinking damnation upon yourself which seems...unpleasant.

Posted by: Lauren at February 11, 2013 01:51 PM (wsGWu)

319 >>Cardinal Arinze, I believe.

Yes, that may be him. Unfortunately, he's 80.

I think Peter Turkson of Ghana may be considered pretty conservative.

Posted by: Y-not at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (5H6zj)

320 Shit it starts by talking about a letter it wrote? What must it always be about it?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (9Bj8R)

321 Yikes. The SEAL who shot OBL said he shot him three
times in the forehead and it opening up in a "V" shape. Said the
American public would not want to see the picture because it's so
gruesome.

{{shudder}}


Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 01:28 PM (UOM4


I guess we Canucks must be made of sterner stuff. I've seen shit before, and it hasn't bothered me.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (673KB)

322 300 Very true, it would be a cold day in hell when they give an American Cardinal the job. It's too bad.
Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 01:49 PM (9U1OG)

Not Catholic, but I've been reading over the past 10-15 years that the African bishops are pretty decent.

Is that still (or actually) the case? I'd enjoy a pope from Africa telling the Bammer to go shove a stump up his ass.

Posted by: Snoop Popey Pope at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (7PqWL)

323 Some think we'll have an asian Pope, although Dolan would make a heck of a Pope

Posted by: Caustic at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (/b8+5)

324 n reaching out towards the Episcopal Church and the Eastern Churches I think he offered them the ability to join the Catholic clergy even if they are married with children.

---

This had been policy, at least within the US Catholic Church for years, as a former Episcopalian bishop in my area had converted to Catholocism and back at one point while he was married.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (e0xKF)

325
How dare you?

How dare you?

Astonishing! How dare you?

Astonishing! How dare you?

Simply dreadful, astonishing.

How dare you?

Gobsmackingly vile. Oh, astonishing.

How dare you? Yew think that you can say these things about me? Astonishing. How dare you?


Posted by: Rev Dr. E Buzz Peers Morgon at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (HQml1)

326 It's a big complex organization. Someone in their 30's is not likely to have the wisdom, experience, or restraint to lead it well. Late 40's would be pushing it.

Then when he's elected at 78, fire all advisers 77 & younger. What can they tell you that you don't already know? And if you are going to keep the advisers, why couldn't they work for a younger guy? Key word: Advisers. That's the point I was trying to make.

Posted by: rickb223 at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (GFM2b)

327 wait, I thought we had one more Pope after Benedict according to that prophet guy, isn't that what someone in the morning news dump thread said?

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (RZ8pf)

328 312 Did the Catholic Church start letting priests marry while I wasn't looking?

The Pope actually can be married - there's no requirement the Church choose a member of the clergy.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (UjSt7)

329 As a Catholic, I'm surprised that these people are not excommunicated, but really, I think the Church overall hopes that *some day* these politicians will return to the Church and do positive things.
Posted by: shibumi at February 11, 2013 01:46 PM (z63Tr)


I can't remember whom it was, though I don't think it was Cardinal Dolan, who called for politicians who are pro-abortion to be excommunicated. I remember there being a huge stink about it but it's my understanding of canon law that he was correct.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Team Stompy. at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (VtjlW)

330 Some people think of Catholicism as a cultural thing - you go to Church for a few big events. They aren't crazy about the religious aspects but dammit, it's *their* heritage and they are going to voice their opinion!

Very much like secular Dem-voting Jews, in other words; they treat Judaism as a social club rather than a religion (because, after all, liberalism is their religion).

Posted by: Ian S. at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (B/VB5)

331 "It's a big complex organization. Someone in their 30's is not likely to have the wisdom, experience, or restraint to lead it well. Late 40's would be pushing it."

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Offering Moobats Gasoline and Matches at February 11, 2013 01:46 PM (0q2P7)

They've got a big, complex bureaucracy to run everything, so the Pope doesn't have to know shit. If they're smart, they'll go with the most charasmatic guy they can find to pump the numbers up.

Posted by: jwest at February 11, 2013 01:53 PM (ZDsRL)

332 Re the "bad Catholics" we're afflicted with in public life, you can basically point to any organized religion and find bad examples. How Harry Reid maintains his status is beyond me.

Posted by: Y-not at February 11, 2013 01:53 PM (5H6zj)

333 Well sure MissMarple, we all can't be scholars like you. I'm just stating my opinion of my perceptions of JPII and Benedict, that's all. If the Catholic Church which is quite frankly a laughing stock most of the time because they don't excommunicate assholes like Kennedy, Pelosi and the like for idiotic statements against the church, I feel I am entitled to state my opinion on how they could appeal to more people. Hell I'd be happy if they actually spent some time on making sure priests are molesting kids instead of whether their masses are in Latin.

Is that ok for ya MissMarple?

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 01:53 PM (9U1OG)

334 Guys, what's the German word for "bunga-bunga?"

Posted by: Piers Morgan at February 11, 2013 01:53 PM (WM+rJ)

335
It's like the Pope World Cup.

---

Which Cardinals are in the Group Of Death this time?

And can the Hand Of God smack the shit out of Maradona while we're at it? That's about 25 years overdue.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 01:53 PM (e0xKF)

336 Maybe he just wanted to go and take a shit in the woods.

Posted by: clonefan at February 11, 2013 01:54 PM (y3vwL)

337 Aren't molesting kids, oops. Or was that freudian slip.

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 01:54 PM (9U1OG)

338 334 Guys, what's the German word for "bunga-bunga?"

---

Schtupa-schtupa?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 01:54 PM (e0xKF)

339 Clearly this is the direct result of our lax assault rifle laws in America.

Posted by: digitalbrownshirt at February 11, 2013 01:54 PM (G1aEt)

340 Posted by: Caustic at February 11, 2013 01:47 PM (/b8+5)

Ooops, my bad, sarcasm meeter broken.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:54 PM (oG3dE)

341 Torrance PD mistook the Popemobile for Chris Dorner's truck.

Thread Winner nominee.

Posted by: trainer @ LIB at February 11, 2013 01:55 PM (QbdUW)

342 >I'd also add that QEII wants to reign longer than
Victoria. She's got about two more years to go before she matches the
latter's 63 years on the throne.


The Queen's not concerned with setting a record. She just wants to help the team any way she can. And she is on record as saying that she wants William to have many years as a family man, wife kids a dog the whole thing, before he ascends to the throne.

The Queen will reign til she dies, then Charles will be King. Then William. And his firstborn, male or female, will succeed him.

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 01:55 PM (8sCoq)

343 I remember reading when I was much younger that there were only three Popes to go on the list, but I couldn't remember if that included John Paul the second.

Didn't that list specifically say the guy in Benedict's slot would have a short term, too?

Posted by: Ian S. at February 11, 2013 01:55 PM (B/VB5)

344 Okay, if the Pope would really force-chokehead-butt Pelosi, I would totally convert to Catholicism.

Fixed.

Posted by: OregonMuse at February 11, 2013 01:55 PM (9GaPd)

345

BTW - according to the Prophecy of the Popes attributed to Saint Malachy, the next Pope is supposed to the last one, end of the list, bring down the curtain.

End of days, Rome in ashes, you know the drill.

Sweet peaceful oblivion at last.


Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at February 11, 2013 01:55 PM (kdS6q)

346 All the media will go into a tizzy over the next few weeks over how this is a chance to liberalize the Church.

As a Catholic I just chuckle. The cardinals could elect TFG and even he would not change one iota of church dogma.

Posted by: Barry O at February 11, 2013 01:55 PM (GAJm6)

347 The Mormons are pretty strict, how does Dingy Harry get away with being a baldfaced liar?

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 01:56 PM (9U1OG)

348 Someone who survived is getting the Medal of Honor? As an ex- (thumbs thru notes) SAS, I'm not buying it.

Posted by: Piers Morgan at February 11, 2013 01:56 PM (FcR7P)

349 I think that girl (who calls herself AlextheChick) is correct about his reason (dementia or terminal illness).

And it is absolutely none of my business other than as a passive observer of the human condition.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at February 11, 2013 01:56 PM (GsoHv)

350 Episcopal priests who join the Roman Catholic Church who are married are allowed to remain priests. Upwards promotion though is no bueno.

That was one of the big problems up until the start of the 20th Century. It seemed the Church was a family business. Who became Pope doled out plum jobs to immediate family and allies.

I see the Episcopal priests serving in Catholic parishes as a good test case either for or against any possible modification of the no marriage ban. See how it goes before rushing into something.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 01:56 PM (VpkjW)

351 It's like the Pope World Cup.
Posted by: eleven at February 11, 2013 01:51 PM (KXm42)



Anyone have a link to who is currently the hot money with the bookies in the UK?


I agree, waiting for that puff of smoke is great fun. I wonder if there's going to be an Official Vatican Pope Smoke cam.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Team Stompy. at February 11, 2013 01:56 PM (VtjlW)

352 brandon

i believe you are correct....

Posted by: phoenixgirl at February 11, 2013 01:56 PM (GVxQo)

353 265 I'm not a Catholic, but I did stay at an Holiday Inn Express last night.
Posted by: Soona at February 11, 2013 01:45 PM (drE9i)

HA! Made my day.

Posted by: mare at February 11, 2013 01:56 PM (A98Xu)

354 If he wants to make the next Pope selection based on a singing competition he can

I'd get cable to see that.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at February 11, 2013 01:56 PM (/kI1Q)

355 299 what do we call the pope when he's no longer pope?

Past ~600 years: dead
Now: insert suggestion here

Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at February 11, 2013 01:57 PM (n8LUb)

356 snoop popey pope... funniest nic ever....laughing hysterically, must pull self together and go to work now.......

Posted by: phoenixgirl at February 11, 2013 01:57 PM (GVxQo)

357 The Queen will reign til she dies, then Charles will be King. Then William. And his firstborn, male or female, will succeed him.

---

I have a feeling the crown will skip a generation, given that Charles is already in his 60s and will likely be in his 70s or 80s before his mom dies.

The tough old bird is 86 and I see her kicking for another decade or so.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 01:57 PM (e0xKF)

358 Has anyone mentioned that the LA ex-cop murderer looks just like LL Cool J?

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 01:57 PM (9U1OG)

359 355 299 what do we call the pope when he's no longer pope?

Past ~600 years: dead
Now: insert suggestion here

---

Pope Emeritus I

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 01:57 PM (e0xKF)

360 Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 01:54 PM (oG3dE)

And your nose seems to be as well.

Can't you smell the cat piss?

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at February 11, 2013 01:58 PM (GsoHv)

361 Maybe the Pope just needs to do a little blood doping, some roids, and pound a few Red Bull's in the morning?

That'll put the spring back in his step and keep the Papal truther's at bay

Posted by: @PurpAv at February 11, 2013 01:58 PM (BH8oG)

362 I guess we Canucks must be made of sterner stuff. I've seen shit before, and it hasn't bothered me.
Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (673KB)


------------------------------------------------


The internet is chocked full of even worse pics. Anyone has access to them.Give us the picture!!

Posted by: Soona at February 11, 2013 01:58 PM (drE9i)

363 End of days, Rome in ashes, you know the drill.

Imagine Barky trying to spin the literal end of the world during his term in office. Wahahahahaha.

Posted by: Ian S. at February 11, 2013 01:58 PM (B/VB5)

364 If he wants to make the next Pope selection based on a singing competition he can

I'd get cable to see that.
Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at February 11, 2013 01:56 PM (/kI1Q)

THIS. IS. VATICAN IDOL...................

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 01:58 PM (l86i3)

365 I think that girl (who calls herself AlextheChick)


*punches you in the face* But out of love!

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Team Stompy. at February 11, 2013 01:58 PM (VtjlW)

366
@299
What do we call the Pope when he no longer is the Pope?

Well, when he was younger he liked to be called "The Rat Man".... so there's that....

Posted by: The Popes teenage friends at February 11, 2013 01:59 PM (XMizE)

367 I preferred the Polish Pope.

OK, no polishing jokes now, cause the shine box is put up.

Posted by: sTevo at February 11, 2013 01:59 PM (vroT8)

368 Re the "bad Catholics" we're afflicted with in public life, you can
basically point to any organized religion and find bad examples. How
Harry Reid maintains his status is beyond me.


LDS' don't publicly bad-mouth those who don't follow the Church's tenets.

Posted by: Undefecating Urso at February 11, 2013 01:59 PM (kqqGm)

369 Can we elect that Desmond the twenty-second fellow?

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at February 11, 2013 01:59 PM (SO2Q8)

370 My FiL went to church for the first time in years this weekend. I blame him.

Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at February 11, 2013 01:59 PM (BvTwT)

371
The internet is chocked full of even worse pics. Anyone has access to them.Give us the picture!!

Posted by: Soona at February 11, 2013 01:58 PM (drE9i

But, but, cat piss told us only New Yorkers should be allowed to see the pic because they're the only ones who care about 9/11. She traveled throughout the U. S. and found it to be fact!

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 02:00 PM (UOM48)

372 BTW - according to the Prophecy of the Popes attributed to Saint Malachy, the next Pope is supposed to the last one, end of the list, bring down the curtain.

Maybe they'll make a Robotic Pope to last a thousand years!

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at February 11, 2013 02:00 PM (hjRtO)

373 Retiring before you are so debillitated you cannot perform the duties of your office?

The US Senate gasps in both horror and wonder.

Posted by: Mikey NTH - It's Not Me, Babe at February 11, 2013 02:00 PM (hLRSq)

374 Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Team Stompy. at February 11, 2013 01:58 PM (VtjlW)

Come for the pithy commentary -- stay for the abuse.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at February 11, 2013 02:00 PM (GsoHv)

375 Anyone have a link to who is currently the hot money with the bookies in the UK?
Who's currently leading on Intrade?

Posted by: Insomniac at February 11, 2013 02:00 PM (DrWcr)

376 well Jaimo is certainly adding to the conversation.

Posted by: JDP at February 11, 2013 02:00 PM (60GaT)

377 /sockpuppet

Posted by: John P. Squibob at February 11, 2013 02:01 PM (kqqGm)

378 Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Team Stompy. at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (VtjlW)

Oh oh oh! It's a cannon law off!

Let's roll.

So there are actually two types of excommunication. For lack of remembering the exact terms we'll call them "implicit" and "explicit." The former is when you do something that technically puts you in the zone of "excommunicated" (Schism events for example) but you no one actually points to you and says "EXCOMMUNICATED"

The latter is basically the same except you do get the pointy finger of doom. So yeah, Dolan was right.

Now stepping outside cannon law. In more recent history the church has been leery about stepping into directly political matters (i.e. politicians) and invoking explicit excommunication for a variety or reasons. More than a few of which are probably obvious (they don't want to be accused of trying to play politics for example.) So they fall back on implicit excommunication rather than explicit. It's a sort of self-defense against secularist backlash I guess.

For things that aren't as close to the political arena they've engaged in explicit excommunication quite often. (St. Stanislaus Parish issues in St. Louis, the Phoenix Hospital case, etc.)

(Keep in mind, I'm drawing the line of "political" as "could be seen as trying to tip an election" not "things in politics." Which is why they may explicit excommunicate an abortion doctor, but not a pro-choice politician.)

FWIW, IANA-Cannon-L, but I've got a fairly reasonable handle on these things.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 02:01 PM (oG3dE)

379 Piers Morgan: proof that an English accent doesn't make you smart

Posted by: phreshone at February 11, 2013 02:01 PM (0SXI6)

380 Douglas Adams kinda beat you to that idea. Electric Monks.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:02 PM (VpkjW)

381 Imagine Barky trying to spin the literal end of the world during his term in office. Wahahahahaha.

God - 1
Skeeter - 0

Posted by: rickb223 at February 11, 2013 02:02 PM (GFM2b)

382 Piers Morgan: proof that an English accent doesn't make you smart
Posted by: phreshone at February 11, 2013 02:01 PM (0SXI6)

Or Sexy.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:02 PM (l86i3)

383 Come on,, really? Really? I mean at this point what difference does it make?

Posted by: Hildabeast Clinton at February 11, 2013 02:02 PM (GQ72I)

384 The Queen will reign til she dies, then Charles will be King.

I think she's thinking maybe she can outlive that imbecile and skip a generation. I've seen potted palms with more brains than he has.

Posted by: @PurpAv at February 11, 2013 02:02 PM (BH8oG)

385 I would like to take this opportunity to go off topic and say that, in the 11th century, England had a king (also king of Denmark) for forty days whose name was Sweyn Forkbeard.

We need these names to make a resurgence, people. Get on that.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:02 PM (4df7R)

386 I can't stomach watching TFG and the Medal of Honor ceremony. Wonder how many times he's used "I" "me" "my" during his speech?

Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 02:02 PM (UOM48)

387 As a male, I doubt that Piers Morgan has a dick.

Posted by: boulder toilet hobo at February 11, 2013 02:03 PM (QTHTd)

388 In all seriousness, the reason I think it will be a South American is that I've read that the Church's influence, attendance and conversion in South America is waning. South America and hispanic in general have been the core of Catholicism for quite some time and the Church will want to hold onto that core.

Posted by: polynikes at February 11, 2013 02:03 PM (m2CN7)

389 As a Catholic, I'm not buying that Piers Leftard Morgan is a Catholic.

Posted by: Pope Benedict at February 11, 2013 02:03 PM (z3Lez)

390 Piers is actually 1/32 Catholic-Cherokee.

Posted by: Roy at February 11, 2013 02:04 PM (VndSC)

391 373 Retiring before you are so debillitated you cannot perform the duties of your office?

The US Senate gasps in both horror and wonder.

---

The silence was broken by several members of the chamber filling up their Depends, such as Sen. Frank Lautenberg and Sen. Tim Johnson.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 02:04 PM (e0xKF)

392 Douglas Adams kinda beat you to that idea. Electric Monks.
Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:02 PM (VpkjW)

So is that like a Temple with Country Bear Jamboree wearing Orange robes.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:04 PM (l86i3)

393 End of days, Rome in ashes, you know the drill.



Imagine Barky trying to spin the literal end of the world during his term in office. Wahahahahaha.

Posted by: Ian S. at February 11, 2013 01:58 PM (B/VB5)
We're on it.

Posted by: MSM and other reality-based media at February 11, 2013 02:04 PM (hO9ad)

394 Surprised no one has tossed this video up yet.
http://youtu.be/USR3bX_PtU4

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:04 PM (VpkjW)

395 Piers Morgan: proof that an English accent doesn't make you smart

Proof that secretly wearing Catholic schoolgirl outfits doesn't make you Catholic.

Posted by: t-bird at February 11, 2013 02:04 PM (FcR7P)

396 Oh oh oh! It's a cannon law off!

Let's roll.

Cannon law #1. Always point the end that the shell comes out of AT the enemy. Points deducted for pointing it at friendly troops.

Posted by: rickb223 at February 11, 2013 02:04 PM (GFM2b)

397 But, but, cat piss told us only New Yorkers should be allowed to see the pic because they're the only ones who care about 9/11. She traveled throughout the U. S. and found it to be fact!
Posted by: Jane D'oh at February 11, 2013 02:00 PM (UOM4


---------------------------------------------------


Well, she was right about the Pope retiring. May God help us.

Posted by: Soona at February 11, 2013 02:05 PM (drE9i)

398 I think that girl (who calls herself AlextheChick)

Someone is asking for a box.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 02:05 PM (8y9MW)

399 As a male, I doubt that Piers Morgan has a dick.

Makes sense. If I were a male without a dick I'd be angry and bitter too.

Posted by: John P. Squibob at February 11, 2013 02:05 PM (kqqGm)

400 "Canon" law. "Cannon law" sounds like something conducted outside the walls of Perugia.

Posted by: boulder toilet hobo at February 11, 2013 02:05 PM (QTHTd)

401 Piers Morgan: proof that an English accent doesn't make you smart


Quite the contrary, I've found. It's like *80 million Bidens on an island.





*Yeah I just picked a number.

Posted by: eleven at February 11, 2013 02:05 PM (KXm42)

402 395 Piers Morgan: proof that an English accent doesn't make you smart

Proof that secretly wearing Catholic schoolgirl outfits doesn't make you Catholic.

---

Nor does spending time in the missionary position make you a missionary.

Posted by: Roy Munson at February 11, 2013 02:05 PM (e0xKF)

403 @CharlieBrownsdildo,

Actually I suffer from swollen adenoids and so my sense of smell is pretty severely diminished. Not gone by any stretch of the imagination, but often I can't smell things that other people complain about.

Seriously...not a joke...yeah...so...erg...thanks.

Oh and also I used to do mouse work, after a few years of that, animal urine ceases to bother you. (The smell thing came in handy during that phase of my life.)

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 02:06 PM (oG3dE)

404 Yikes!

Peirs Morgan = Peter the Roman

The End.

Posted by: Fritz at February 11, 2013 02:06 PM (WM+rJ)

405 Great MOH story. I've been out of the loop news wise for 3 days, just read about he crazy ex-cop cop killer and his "fans". One fucked up world we're living in.

Posted by: lincolntf at February 11, 2013 02:06 PM (ZshNr)

406 398 I think that girl (who calls herself AlextheChick)

Someone is asking for a box.

---

I'm not touching that joke with a 10-foot pole.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 02:06 PM (e0xKF)

407 How about Criss Angel? You get a Pope who can do the "floating" trick on the street and the pews would be packed around the world.

Then all it would take is for the new Pope to say how cool it was to take out Muslims.

Posted by: jwest at February 11, 2013 02:07 PM (ZDsRL)

408 >I think she's thinking maybe she can outlive that imbecile and skip a generation. I've seen potted palms with more brains than he has.

Posted by: @PurpAv at February 11, 2013 02:02 PM (BH8oG)


Not sure what she thinks of Chuck, but she believes she has a duty to serve until she dies. From what I've read of her, when she vowed to devote 'the whole of her life' to serve, she actually meant it.

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 02:07 PM (8sCoq)

409 Someone is asking for a box.

And not the good kind.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 11, 2013 02:07 PM (zF6Iw)

410 Proof that secretly wearing Catholic schoolgirl outfits doesn't make you Catholic.
Posted by: t-bird at February 11, 2013 02:04 PM (FcR7P)


------------------------------------------


But the reputation stands. Catholic girls rocked.

Posted by: Soona at February 11, 2013 02:07 PM (drE9i)

411 Don't underestimate Benedict. He's always been a force to be reckoned with. He must have a very solid reason for making this move now.

Posted by: Caustic at February 11, 2013 02:07 PM (/b8+5)

412


FWIW, IANA-Cannon-L, but I've got a fairly reasonable handle on these things.


Posted by: tsrblke



Except for the whole spelling of Canon Law, that is.

Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 02:07 PM (UaxA0)

413 OSP, I would have to reread it, been a few years. IIRC the Electric Monk just kinda hung around being a nuisance.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:08 PM (VpkjW)

414 >Great MOH story. I've been out of the loop news wise
for 3 days, just read about he crazy ex-cop cop killer and his "fans".
One fucked up world we're living in.



Posted by: lincolntf at February 11, 2013 02:06 PM (ZshNr)


Welcome to the party, pal!

Posted by: Jones in CO at February 11, 2013 02:08 PM (8sCoq)

415 Except for the whole spelling of Canon Law, that is.

Ask him what "neigh impossible" means.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 02:08 PM (8y9MW)

416 I believe in theology by omission:

Jesus never said anything about homosexuality or abortion: therefore neither one is sinful.

Oh and, He never said anything about bestiality, pedophilia, pederasty, incest, cannibalism, drug use, or guns, - therefore - it's all acceptable!

Wait. What the hel......

Posted by: Piers Morgan Catholic at February 11, 2013 02:09 PM (z3Lez)

417 Cannon Law is best conducted by William Conrad.

Posted by: Kevin in ABQ at February 11, 2013 02:09 PM (BvTwT)

418 Alright seriously, we need to treat Morgan, like Andrew Sullivan, and not link his brainspawn mind thoughts.

Posted by: archie goodwin at February 11, 2013 02:09 PM (Jsiw/)

419 Ask him what "neigh impossible" means.


Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 02:08 PM (8y9MW)


His chances with Sarah Jessica Parker?

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 11, 2013 02:09 PM (lZBBB)

420 Someone is asking for a box.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 02:05 PM (8y9MW)

She's all talk. I have incriminating photos of AtC wearing sensible shoes.

I'm untouchable.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at February 11, 2013 02:10 PM (GsoHv)

421 Did Ace go back to sleep after the last post?

Or is he writing a 15,000 word essay on D-list film that just came out?

Posted by: John P. Squibob at February 11, 2013 02:10 PM (kqqGm)

422 Jesus never said anything about homosexuality or abortion: therefore neither one is sinful.

Pretty sure he never mentioned firearms, either.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at February 11, 2013 02:10 PM (/kI1Q)

423 252 ---" How can professed Catholic politicians like Pelosi and Kerry and Cuomo, who publicly (and even vociferously) advocate and argue for abortion and other policies, programs and legislation completely antithetical to Church teaching, still be Catholic?"

Posted by: troyriser at February 11, 2013 01:43 PM (vtiE6)

The same way that Barack Obama can "be" a Protestant. They CLAIM to be.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at February 11, 2013 02:10 PM (C8mVl)

424 411 Don't underestimate Benedict. He's always been a force to be reckoned with. He must have a very solid reason for making this move now.

Posted by: Caustic at February 11, 2013 02:07 PM (/b8+5)


I don't buy the "dementia" thing.
If I'm wrong about that, he's smart beyond words, because I've never, ever, ever met anybody who recognized that in themselves personally.

Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 11, 2013 02:10 PM (Qxe/p)

425 As a Catholic, I'm not buying Piers as a Catholic.
----
DITTO

Posted by: gigg at February 11, 2013 02:10 PM (41VCE)

426 Or is he writing a 15,000 word essay on D-list film that just came out?

---

I'm willing to read that post if it's about Cabin In The Woods.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 02:11 PM (e0xKF)

427 Jesus's core teaching was to bend over and take it on terrorism, or as I refer to it, the foreign policy Golden Rule

Posted by: Ron Paul at February 11, 2013 02:11 PM (60GaT)

428 Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 02:07 PM (UaxA0)

Yeah, that's just my really poor spelling in general.

I frequently fuck up words, especially i before e and homophones. I couldn't spell "the" without spell check.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 02:11 PM (oG3dE)

429 "M'Lords, the Pope has asked me to convey his judgement on this most pressing matter. He says 'Neigh.'"

"See what you get for electing a horse to the Holy See. Nothing but 'neigh this' and 'neigh that.' A veritable font of nay-saying."

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:11 PM (VpkjW)

430 I have incriminating photos of AtC wearing sensible shoes.


Someone here isn't expecting the Spanish Inquisition.

Posted by: eleven at February 11, 2013 02:11 PM (KXm42)

431 Jesus's core teaching was to bend over and take it

***

Or, as he phrased it, turn the other cheek.

Posted by: WalrusRex at February 11, 2013 02:12 PM (XUKZU)

432 "See what you get for electing a horse to the Holy See. Nothing but 'neigh this' and 'neigh that.' A veritable font of nay-saying."
Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:11 PM (VpkjW)


LOL

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:12 PM (l86i3)

433 389 As a Catholic, I'm not buying that Piers Leftard Morgan is a Catholic.


Posted by: Pope Benedict at February 11, 2013 02:03 PM (z3Lez)


LOL... yeah.... because the way he thinks England is sooooo great??? Shouldn't he be a "Church of England" kinda guy?

Cake, or Death?

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 11, 2013 02:12 PM (lZBBB)

434 Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 11, 2013 02:10 PM (Qxe/p)

Perhaps not initially (and of course this is conjecture), but popes see doctors just like the rest of us.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at February 11, 2013 02:12 PM (GsoHv)

435 Ask him what "neigh impossible" means

It means he's misplaced his footstool.

Posted by: boulder toilet hobo at February 11, 2013 02:12 PM (QTHTd)

436 I hope Presdent Obama picks better Popes then Bush did.......

Posted by: Mary Clogginstein from Brattleboro, Vt at February 11, 2013 02:12 PM (IkHXL)

437 So I had a bigger curious thought. If St. Malachy is the metal plate/list of Popes guy I'm thinking of, and they made him a saint, doesn't that mean the Church takes him seriously.

Or rather, won't the Cardinals take him seriously in making their pick?

Posted by: Methos at February 11, 2013 02:12 PM (hO9ad)

438 White House Press Secretary Jay Carney said today that President Obama believes the country has a spending problem, contradicting what Nancy Pelosi said on Fox News Sunday, in which she said it was a "false argument" to say the federal government has a spending problem.

CARNEY: Of course the President believes that we have a spending problem that is specifically driven by, and I think every economist who’s insights into this area are worth the paper on which his or her PhD is printed, would tell you that the principle driver when it comes to spending of our deficts and debt is healthcare spending – and that’s just a fact. What is also a fact is that we have reduced non-defense discretionary spending to it’s lowest level as a percentage of our economy since Dwight Eisenhower was President. I think only a few of you here were covering Eisenhower, so that is a long time and that doesn’t mean that we can’t (laughter)… Tom, no, okay. No, there are people who have spent a long time covering and know this stuff back and forward and know this fact, that non-defense discretionary spending has not been this low for generations.

Who'd thunk it ? They never told me.

Posted by: Nancy Pelosi at February 11, 2013 02:13 PM (e8kgV)

439 I actually fear what Ace will write about the latest cinematic bomb ' 'Movie 43.'

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:13 PM (VpkjW)

440 Did Ace go back to sleep after the last post?Or is he writing a 15,000 word essay on D-list film that just came out?
Posted by: John P. Squibob at February 11, 2013 02:10 PM (kqqGm)


------------------------------------------------


You're forgetting. This is "Viable Excuse Monday".

Posted by: Soona at February 11, 2013 02:14 PM (drE9i)

441 Me too Mary. Me too.

Posted by: eleven at February 11, 2013 02:14 PM (KXm42)

442 Don't underestimate Benedict. He's always been a force to be
reckoned with. He must have a very solid reason for making this move
now.

***

Compare and contrast with Chocolate Jesus. One respects his constituents too much to remain in office when he is unable to preform the required tasks.

Posted by: WalrusRex at February 11, 2013 02:15 PM (XUKZU)

443 "Cannon law" sounds like something conducted outside the walls of Perugia.
Posted by: boulder toilet hobo at February 11, 2013 02:05 PM (QTHTd)

Sounds like the title to a Seventies private eye series. With a talking car. And a helipcopter. Show a guy in a plaid Seventies leisure suit being thrown out of an office building window for no good reason. A deep voiceover that says, 'He's a rule breaker, a maverick, a loose cannon whofollows only one law. His law. Cannon Law...'. Cue really cool soundtrack with lots of synthesizer and funky bass.

Posted by: troyriser at February 11, 2013 02:15 PM (vtiE6)

444 I bet Obama thinks he'd be a good pope.

Posted by: Mindy at February 11, 2013 02:15 PM (gBOQE)

445 I can't remember whom it was, though I don't think
it was Cardinal Dolan, who called for politicians who are pro-abortion
to be excommunicated. I remember there being a huge stink about it but
it's my understanding of canon law that he was correct.



Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD. Team Stompy. at February 11, 2013 01:52 PM (VtjlW)


I am certain that the reason the Church does not excommunicate nominally "catholic" politicians like Pelosi is that they would be seen as attempting to interfere in the political processes of a sovereign nation, and the blowback from that would harm the Church.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at February 11, 2013 02:15 PM (673KB)

446 Perhaps not initially (and of course this is conjecture), but popes see doctors just like the rest of us.

Posted by: CharlieBrown'sDildo at February 11, 2013 02:12 PM (GsoHv)


True. But I've yet to meet a human being who actually thought he might be losing his grip.
Especially when that person is losing his grip.

Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 11, 2013 02:15 PM (Qxe/p)

447 I actually fear what Ace will write about the latest cinematic bomb ' 'Movie 43.'
Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:13 PM (VpkjW)

Never heard of it.

Although I did shock the hell out of Mrs. Sailor by watching Battlestar Gallactica Blood and Chrome last night. First space Sci Fi I have ever sat through. It was kind of neat. I do however have a question.

Mrs, Sailor said Lauran Greens Character was named Adama on the old series. Is this him as a yound man?

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:16 PM (l86i3)

448 Sounds like the title to a Seventies private eye series. With a talking car. And a helipcopter. Show a guy in a plaid Seventies leisure suit being thrown out of an office building window for no good reason. A deep voiceover that says, 'He's a rule breaker, a maverick, a loose cannon whofollows only one law. His law. Cannon Law...'. Cue really cool soundtrack with lots of synthesizer and funky bass.
Posted by: troyriser at February 11, 2013 02:15 PM (vtiE6)


And Cannon either is or is friends with a sass-spouting black man with a phenomenal 'fro.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:16 PM (4df7R)

449 True. But I've yet to meet a human being who actually thought he might be losing his grip.

Especially when that person is losing his grip.


Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 11, 2013 02:15 PM (Qxe/p)


Was gonna say... Exhibit 1: Barrak Obama....

But... can you loose what you never had to begin with?

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 11, 2013 02:17 PM (lZBBB)

450 I am certain that the reason the Church does not excommunicate nominally "catholic" politicians like Pelosi is that they would be seen as attempting to interfere in the political processes of a sovereign nation, and the blowback from that would harm the Church.

At least you certain. That is something.

Posted by: nip at February 11, 2013 02:17 PM (11Tdq)

451 True. But I've yet to meet a human being who actually thought he might be losing his grip.

Especially when that person is losing his grip.


Yep. Try taking a set of Car Keys from an 80 year old.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:17 PM (l86i3)

452 True. But I've yet to meet a human being who actually thought he might be losing his grip.
Especially when that person is losing his grip.


Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 11, 2013 02:15 PM (Qxe/p)

It's more common than you'd think. Firstly, the pope has lots of trusted advisers.Secondly, in the cases of Alzheimer's it's quite common for the people to recognize their condition during the periods of lucidity. Most dementia have a slow ramp up period (often followed by stability, then a more rapid decline), so if the hunches are accurate he could still be in the early enough stages to recognize the oncoming problem and he's wise enough to act.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 02:18 PM (oG3dE)

453 400 "Canon" law. "Cannon law" sounds like something conducted outside the walls of Perugia.
---

He who has the cannons, makes the laws

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at February 11, 2013 02:18 PM (SO2Q8)

454 "What is also a fact is that we have reduced non-defense discretionary
spending to it’s lowest level as a percentage of our economy since
Dwight Eisenhower was President"

hmmm. just a tad skeptical of this claim. but then i guess Carney would say i'm anti-fact

if you look at his argument it's not much diff. from Pelosi's actually -- we have a spending problem, but since it's a healthcare spending problem Obamacare'll fix things. problem solved!

Posted by: JDP at February 11, 2013 02:18 PM (60GaT)

455 Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at February 11, 2013 02:15 PM (673KB)

Yeah.... because the Catholic Church has NEVER meddled in Politics...

Posted by: The Holy Roman Emporer at February 11, 2013 02:18 PM (lZBBB)

456 And Cannon either is or is friends with a sass-spouting black man with a phenomenal 'fro.

And that thing that does shwicka .......shwicka.......shwicka shwicka schwick.

Posted by: eleven at February 11, 2013 02:18 PM (KXm42)

457 I kinda watched some of Blood and Chrome last night. But mainly ignored it. Never even noticed the names of the characters.

Was easy to ignore after that guy put his weapon down atop the piano aimed at his buddy.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:19 PM (VpkjW)

458 My wife had a conversation recently with another wife mother in our parish/school. Both of our families have kids in college, high school grade school, and the subject of paying for college came up. Mind you, this family is about to short-sell their house, and she was bitching about having to pay for Catholic high school up-front.

Of course, they voted for Obumbles, champion of abortion rights. She honestly said that the SCOAMF is "going to fix our money problems".

Another so-called Catholic fails the idiot test....


Posted by: Tex's Assaultin' Batteries at February 11, 2013 02:19 PM (wtvvX)

459 The Queen will reign til she dies, then Charles will be King.

***

Because supermarkets need grand opening ceremonies.

Posted by: WalrusRex at February 11, 2013 02:19 PM (XUKZU)

460 Yes, it is, but it's more Edward James Olmos's depiction of him,

Posted by: archie goodwin at February 11, 2013 02:19 PM (Jsiw/)

461 I bet Obama thinks he'd be a good pope.

But he'd be expected to give up the Beyonce/Jay-Z orgies featuring six-figure champagne fountains...

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at February 11, 2013 02:19 PM (/kI1Q)

462
Does the Pope lose his Holiness after the new Pope is selected?

Posted by: Velvet Ambition at February 11, 2013 02:19 PM (R8hU8)

463 The piano was aimed at his buddy???

Posted by: Tex's Assaultin' Batteries at February 11, 2013 02:19 PM (wtvvX)

464 I have a feeling the crown will skip a generation,
given that Charles is already in his 60s and will likely be in his 70s
or 80s before his mom dies.



The tough old bird is 86 and I see her kicking for another decade or so.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 11, 2013 01:57 PM (e0xKF)


Not to mention that the males in her line have tended to die early.

Posted by: Alberta Oil Peon at February 11, 2013 02:20 PM (673KB)

465 I am utterly batshit crazy.

Posted by: ShortPiers Morgan at February 11, 2013 02:20 PM (vbh31)

466 So y'all picked up on my sense of smell problems and my rampant spelling grammar mistakes in just this one thread.

Anyone wanna throw out a few fat jokes while you're at it .

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 02:20 PM (oG3dE)

467 Maybe this makes me a papal truther but Benedict resigning is a BFD, as VP Joe would say. Even if he feels frail or is seeing early signs of senility in himself, he is supposed to trust that God will protect the Church and his office and stay on.

Posted by: L, elle at February 11, 2013 02:21 PM (0PiQ4)

468 At one point in Papal history, the College of Cardinals claimed they could not meet to elect a new Pope. Because Caterina S'Forza and her forces held the Castle S'angelo who's cannons commanded where the Cardinals were meeting. So the story goes they pleaded with Caterina's husband to talk sense into her and let them elect a new Pope.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:21 PM (VpkjW)

469 Sounds like the title to a Seventies private eye series. With a talking car. And a helipcopter. Show a guy in a plaid Seventies leisure suit being thrown out of an office building window for no good reason. A deep voiceover that says, 'He's a rule breaker, a maverick, a loose cannon whofollows only one law. His law. Cannon Law...'. Cue really cool soundtrack with lots of synthesizer and funky bass.

CANNON LAW: A Quinn Martin Production.

Tonight's Episode: The Vatican Freak-Out.

With Special Guest Star Larry Storch.

And Introducing Joey Heatherton as "Mama" Superior.

Posted by: Mary Poppins' Practically Perfect Piercing at February 11, 2013 02:22 PM (zF6Iw)

470 Is the fighting over now?

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 02:22 PM (9U1OG)

471 True. But I've yet to meet a human being who actually thought he might be losing his grip. Especially when that person is losing his grip. Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 11, 2013 02:15 PM (Qxe/p)

His doctor recently recommended that he forego any trans-Atnlantic travel due to his health. Whether that's mental or physical health I can't say for sure, but it's clear he's growing more and more frail by the day.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:22 PM (4df7R)

472 Anyone wanna throw out a few fat jokes while you're at it .

We'll probably get around to it eventually.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 02:22 PM (8y9MW)

473 Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at February 11, 2013 02:19 PM (/kI1Q)


Somehow I don't think those expectations would stop him.

Posted by: Mindy at February 11, 2013 02:23 PM (gBOQE)

474 Tell him the Pope just wants to spend more time at the range with his AR.

Posted by: skinbad at February 11, 2013 02:23 PM (e9PSt)

475 Yeah he aimed the whole piano at his buddy. It was an assault piano for having more than seven keys.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:23 PM (VpkjW)

476 Schism!

Rhymes with . . .


Prism?

Posted by: bonhomme at February 11, 2013 02:23 PM (99E5V)

477
468 At one point in Papal history, the College of Cardinals claimed they could not meet to elect a new Pope. Because Caterina S'Forza and her forces held the Castle S'angelo who's cannons commanded where the Cardinals were meeting. So the story goes they pleaded with Caterina's husband to talk sense into her and let them elect a new Pope.
Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:21 PM (VpkjW)


Was that for the election of Rodrigo Borgia? Of course she would want to stop him. He was a Templar.

Posted by: buzzion at February 11, 2013 02:23 PM (GULKT)

478 Mrs, Sailor said Lauran Greens Character was named Adama on the old series. Is this him as a yound man?

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:16 PM (l86i3)


Yes and no.
In the (network) TV series, Adama was played by Lorne Greene (Bonanza).
In the SyFi series, Adama was played by Edward James Olmos.
I think that's why they picked a "Hispanic" to play the part in this "Blood and Chrome" thing.

Ask mrs OSP if the co-pilot was the counterpart to him. In the series, it was played by an older white-haired guy, but I can't remember the names.

I do remember the two "went way back" in the SyFi version.

Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 11, 2013 02:23 PM (Qxe/p)

479 Can the Queen just give the crown to William? Or does it HAVE to go to her son?

Whenever talking about the Queen I always recall Frank Dreben talking about how silly we may think having a queen is.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 02:24 PM (gmeXX)

480 >>>Yep. Try taking a set of Car Keys from an 80 year old.

My grandfather was legendary for his antics behind the wheel. Sitting behind the wheel of a souped up Dodge Matador with Granny in the back seat hitting him in the back of the head every time he scared her, he was Mr Magoo with a lead foot and a V8.

Posted by: Fritz at February 11, 2013 02:25 PM (WM+rJ)

481 @496: Well, there was Cannon, with William Conrad, which I believe was a Q-M Production.

Posted by: Tex's Assaultin' Batteries at February 11, 2013 02:25 PM (wtvvX)

482 Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) Channelling Breitbart at February 11, 2013 02:22 PM (8y9MW)

Remind me to figure out when you're driving through my town on your trip and advise you to stay at a hotel in Charlack .

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 02:25 PM (oG3dE)

483 And that thing that does shwicka .......shwicka.......shwicka shwicka schwick.

A guitar. For that particular application Fenders were popular.

Posted by: Ian S. at February 11, 2013 02:25 PM (B/VB5)

484 How long has Benedict been in "office"? It doesn't seem that long at all.

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 02:25 PM (9U1OG)

485 468 At one point in Papal history, the College of Cardinals claimed they could not meet to elect a new Pope. Because Caterina S'Forza and her forces held the Castle S'angelo who's cannons commanded where the Cardinals were meeting. So the story goes they pleaded with Caterina's husband to talk sense into her and let them elect a new Pope.


Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:21 PM (VpkjW)


See? Cannon Law.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:25 PM (4df7R)

486 @ 452 ^^ this

@ 462 - it's been over 600 years since a Pope resigned so I don't think that's quite been thought about. I would think however, that since he's earned the "Holy Father" title, that won't change. It has however been noted too that he's planning to retire to a convent. My guess would be that until he dies, we won't be seeing him again.

Posted by: TiminAL at February 11, 2013 02:25 PM (A9c4d)

487 Original Battlestar Colonel Tigh was Adam's friend and XO. And pretty smart on his own. Also original Tigh was not an alcoholic.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:25 PM (VpkjW)

488 This thread is now older than the Pope

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at February 11, 2013 02:26 PM (SO2Q8)

489 In the SyFi series, Adama was played by Edward James Olmos.
I think that's why they picked a "Hispanic" to play the part in this "Blood and Chrome" thing.


So is it Adamas kid or is that a prequil?

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:26 PM (l86i3)

490 he is supposed to trust that God will protect the Church

You know that joke about the guy who kept turning down being rescued from the flood because he believed God would save him...then after he dies God says "Dude! I sent you two boats and a helicopter!"


I'm just an outside observer with a thing for Freising (Benedict's arms feature St. Korbinian's bear...) and men who love cats, but I don't think you get to be "God's Rottweiler" by sitting back and watching stuff happen.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ needs a beer at February 11, 2013 02:26 PM (/kI1Q)

491 God, retiring to a convent. Saturday nights are going to suck except for bingo before jello.

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 02:26 PM (9U1OG)

492

But he'd be expected to give up the Beyonce/Jay-Z orgies featuring six-figure champagne fountains...


Posted by: HeatherRadish



Not if the last pope to replace an abdicating one is any indication . . .

Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 02:27 PM (UaxA0)

493 @475: Was it a full-auto PLAYER PIANO OF DEATH!?!?!?!

Posted by: Tex's Assaultin' Batteries at February 11, 2013 02:27 PM (wtvvX)

494 This thread may be old but nobody wants to shit all over the MOH ceremony thread yet.

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 02:27 PM (9U1OG)

495 I would think however, that since he's earned the "Holy Father" title, that won't change.
---
Holy Grandfather?

Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at February 11, 2013 02:28 PM (SO2Q8)

496 So is it Adamas kid or is that a prequil?
Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:26 PM (l86i3)


Pretty sure Blood Chrome was a prequel. Lee "Apollo" Adama was Adama's son in the reimagined version. I don't recall if Richard Hatch's Apollo was Lorne Greene's son in the original, having only seen bits and pieces.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:28 PM (4df7R)

497 #486 His title will revert to "Cardinal Ratzinger."

He will be the senior cardinal in the College of Cardinals.

Posted by: Miss Marple at February 11, 2013 02:28 PM (GoIUi)

498 I would think however, that since he's earned the "Holy Father" title, that won't change.
---
Holy Grandfather?
Posted by: Buzzsaw90 at February 11, 2013 02:28 PM (SO2Q

Maybe they'll all call him a quitter like they did Sarah Palin.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:28 PM (l86i3)

499


this thread will outlast the current pope.

Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 02:28 PM (UaxA0)

500 Yeah Caterina got locked up by one of the Borgias. She did not like the Borgias at all. When asked about her captivity, she apparently told the questioner the details would shock them.

Caterina, during one of the seiges of the city-state she ruled, even taunted the besiegers. See they had captured some of her children. Apparently she got on the battlements, did a Madonna, and told them she could make more children.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:29 PM (VpkjW)

501 I mean the Chris Kyle funeral. Either way, too soon.

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 02:29 PM (9U1OG)

502 >>>My guess would be that until he dies, we won't be seeing him again.

He will go to a Catholic retirement home. (I've actually seen them, usually a holy order of sisters care for the retired Priests until their death) He has to renounce the Ministry of the Bishop of Rome in order to leave the position, which means he renounces all titles associated with being the descendent of St Peter. He becomes just another priest again.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Offering Moobats Gasoline and Matches at February 11, 2013 02:30 PM (0q2P7)

503 So is it Adamas kid or is that a prequil?

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:26 PM (l86i3)


Prequel.
Network series began and ended with the flight from the Ceylons, always in uncharted space. No "jump drives".

SyFi flavor began with leaving the solar system resulting from the Ceylon invasion. "Jump drives" made it possible for brief returns to the original solar system.

This was allegedly how all that got started.

Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 11, 2013 02:30 PM (Qxe/p)

504 Piers is a CATHOLIC?

--apostate we might have to fire him!

Posted by: CNN Your Global Warming Channel at February 11, 2013 02:30 PM (r2PLg)

505 Miss Marple: and you know this how (not arguing he point)?

Posted by: TiminAL at February 11, 2013 02:30 PM (A9c4d)

506 Apollo and Athena, along with Zak, were Adama's children in the original Battlestar Galactica series. It is because Adama goes home to Caprica to find his wife after the attack that the Exodus is announced to survivors who were attracted by a Viper landing.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:31 PM (VpkjW)

507 Prequel.Network series began and ended with the flight from the Ceylons, always in uncharted space. No "jump drives".

I think you mean Cylon, as opposed to the former name of current Sri Lanka.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:31 PM (4df7R)

508 A priest on Fox said it this morning. I assumed he knew what he was talking about.

Posted by: Miss Marple at February 11, 2013 02:32 PM (GoIUi)

509


Was that for the election of Rodrigo Borgia? Of course she would want to stop him. He was a Templar.

Posted by: buzzio


No, Innocent the IV, immediate predecessor to Rodrigo. But Alexander VI actually waited until Innocent was dead (even if he might have helped him along at the end). Innocent wasn't so innocent for all that. He had two children and married into the Medici family.

Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 02:32 PM (UaxA0)

510 Cylons or Toasters.

Skin jobs are Nexus-6.

Sexaroids are 33-S made by Genom.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:32 PM (VpkjW)

511 Misread that as "Papal Thunder." Which would have made the post awesome.

Posted by: sans_sheriff at February 11, 2013 02:32 PM (OQHM+)

512 494 This thread may be old but nobody wants to shit all over the MOH ceremony thread yet.
Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 02:27 PM (9U1OG)

________'

exactly.

Posted by: CNN Your Global Warming Channel at February 11, 2013 02:33 PM (r2PLg)

513

Innocent the VIII, not the IV

Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 02:33 PM (UaxA0)

514 Papal Thunder, the Vatican Air Force.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:33 PM (VpkjW)

515 Misread that as "Papal Thunder." Which would have made the post awesome.
Posted by: sans_sheriff at February 11, 2013 02:32 PM (OQHM+)


Well, if the Revelationy prognostications are correct, "papal thunder" may not be far off.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:33 PM (4df7R)

516 Everything is a conspiracy as long as it doesn't include the conspiracy of Chocolate Jesus in the White House.

Posted by: Piers Morgan at February 11, 2013 02:33 PM (z3Lez)

517 "Papal Thunder."

LOL, MMA style pope selection. Pay Per View.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:33 PM (l86i3)

518 I'm going to Disneeehhhh LAAANNNDDDD!!!11!!

Posted by: Teh p0pez at February 11, 2013 02:34 PM (UZQM8)

519 Innocent the VIII, not the IV
Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 02:33 PM (UaxA0)


WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE!?

Posted by: Shrillary at February 11, 2013 02:34 PM (4df7R)

520 Now that Piers has admitted on our channel his allegiance to another faith--his days are numbered.

Posted by: CNN Your Global Warming Channel at February 11, 2013 02:34 PM (r2PLg)

521 I think you mean Cylon, as opposed to the former name of current Sri Lanka.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:31 PM (4df7R)


I stand corrected.
I have a bad hobbit of misspelling that.

Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 11, 2013 02:35 PM (Qxe/p)

522 >>>#486 His title will revert to "Cardinal Ratzinger."

>>>He will be the senior cardinal in the College of Cardinals.

Umm I don't think so. His Papal name change to Benedict is permanent. He is unlikely to continue as a Cardinal in the College and will likely head to retirement.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Offering Moobats Gasoline and Matches at February 11, 2013 02:35 PM (0q2P7)

523 And Introducing Joey Heatherton as "Mama" Superior.

Oh boy I hope the antenna on the roof isn't frozen, spin, kachunk, kachunk, kachunk.

Posted by: DaveA at February 11, 2013 02:35 PM (JJdOG)

524 There is some good news. The Vatican will have to strike new Papal coinage.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:35 PM (VpkjW)

525 514 Papal Thunder, the Vatican Air Force.
Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:33 PM (VpkjW)


_______________

Would they still wear tights?

Posted by: CNN Your Global Warming Channel at February 11, 2013 02:35 PM (r2PLg)

526 Innocent wasn't so innocent for all that.


May I say how not shocked I am without some kind of Inquisition?

Posted by: eleven at February 11, 2013 02:36 PM (KXm42)

527 Papal Thunder. Sounds like an energy drink.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:36 PM (4df7R)

528 I stand corrected.I have a bad hobbit of misspelling that.
Posted by: jwb7605 (Let It Burn) at February 11, 2013 02:35 PM (Qxe/p)


lol!

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:37 PM (4df7R)

529 I remember the original B-S on Sunday nights in college. Everyone thought it was the next Star Trek.

It was not the next Star Trek. God, I hated that kid's pet. And any show that talks about how many "microns away" something was located was only to be mocked...

Posted by: Tex's Assaultin' Batteries at February 11, 2013 02:37 PM (wtvvX)

530 467 ---"Maybe this makes me a papal truther but Benedict resigning is a BFD, as VP Joe would say."

Posted by: L, elle at February 11, 2013 02:21 PM (0PiQ4)

It's a big deal. No way Benedict would do it without good reason. Everything in his life leads me to believe he is doing this for the good of the Church. This is not a man who has ever exhibited either laziness or carelessness.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at February 11, 2013 02:37 PM (C8mVl)

531 What Pope Benedict is doing is not that odd. Just been centuries. Retire, go into seclusion, mediate, repent, pray some more, meditate, and basically get one's life in order before the shuffling off the mortal coil.

Posted by: Anna Puma (+SmuD) at February 11, 2013 02:37 PM (VpkjW)

532 527 Papal Thunder. Sounds like an energy drink.
Sounds to me like too much Bratwurst.

Posted by: TiminAL at February 11, 2013 02:37 PM (A9c4d)

533 Maybe they'll all call him a quitter like they did Sarah Palin.
Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:28 PM (l86i3)


-----------------------------------------------


Which reminds me. We haven't heard from JeffB or Hollowpoint about this.

Posted by: Soona at February 11, 2013 02:38 PM (drE9i)

534 Which reminds me. We haven't heard from JeffB or Hollowpoint about this.
Posted by: Soona at February 11, 2013 02:38 PM (drE9i)

LOL, no shit.

Posted by: Oldsailors Poet, Author of Amy Lynn available on KINDLE finally at February 11, 2013 02:39 PM (l86i3)

535 It was not the next Star Trek. God, I hated that kid's pet

Kids on TV shows or in films are NEVER A GOOD THING.

Well, I shouldn't say never. One in a hundred is okay. But the other 99 should all be cut from the script by the studio before the damn thing goes into production.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:39 PM (4df7R)

536 What are you kids still doing here? There's sadness and mourning awaiting you upstairs.

Posted by: L, elle at February 11, 2013 02:40 PM (0PiQ4)

537 Papal haze all in my brain
Lately things just don't seem the same

Posted by: Dr. Varno at February 11, 2013 02:40 PM (H/AAD)

538 Amen to that, MWR...

Posted by: Tex's Assaultin' Batteries at February 11, 2013 02:40 PM (wtvvX)

539
536 What are you kids still doing here? There's sadness and mourning awaiting you upstairs.
Posted by: L, elle at February 11, 2013 02:40 PM (0PiQ4)


That's why we're hanging out down here. You don't want a bunch of foul-mouthed drunks befouling a memorial thread.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:40 PM (4df7R)

540 536 What are you kids still doing here? There's sadness and mourning awaiting you upstairs.
Posted by: L, elle at February 11, 2013 02:40 PM (0PiQ4)
_________

Consider this the basement rec room.

Posted by: CNN Your Global Warming Channel at February 11, 2013 02:41 PM (r2PLg)

541 Gonna go to where the angels sing.
'scuse me, while I kiss my ring.

Posted by: Tex's Assaultin' Batteries at February 11, 2013 02:42 PM (wtvvX)

542 I always love it when the Catholic church makes news because it brings the crazies (progressives and traditionals alike) out in full force, telling everyone the best way to run the church that apparently only exists in their heads, since it doesn't really square with the precarious balance the church has to strike in order to carry out its pastoral duties of the church in the real world. And when you point that out, then suddenly everyone's a frickin' genius scholar about What The Chruch Used To Do(TM), as though all it took to totally justify policy proposals or inexorably knock down objections to current practice were to cite Formosus or the Borgias or some other clearly anomalous figure, or to act as though the relationship between the Papacy and the development of national kingship in the middle ages is a clear parallel for how the Papacy should conduct itself viz-a-viz modern nation states.

It's like Kip's Law, but for religion. If only they were pope, none of this bad stuff would happen. LOL!

(Cue: stale, sour pedophilia joke as a sign for the lack of a serious counterargument)

Posted by: JeremiadBullfrog at February 11, 2013 02:42 PM (s8S6W)

543 May I say how not shocked I am without some kind of Inquisition?
Posted by: eleven at February 11, 2013 02:36 PM (KXm42)

I wouldn't expect one...

Posted by: cajun carrot at February 11, 2013 02:42 PM (UZQM8)

544 OT (does it matter at this point?)

Ted Nugent is going to be a guest at the SoTU.

I'd almost be tempted to tune in now instead of watching the Dog Show.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:43 PM (4df7R)

545 You know, I don't think he would be showing up for meetings with the College of Cardinals. I think he would be considered the senior, which is something different.

But we will see. Either the priest I heard was wrong, or he wasn't.

Since I have heard that he will live in an apartment in the Vatican AND that he will retire to a monastery, I believe we are now getting confusion from reporters and it is getting magnified.

Posted by: Miss Marple at February 11, 2013 02:43 PM (GoIUi)

546 Was that for the election of Rodrigo Borgia? Of course she would want to stop him. He was a Templar.

Man did that series go downhill.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at February 11, 2013 02:43 PM (IS2o0)

547

Consider this the basement rec room.


you bet. I'm in no mood for proper behavior, and have no desire to ruin a memorial to a true hero.

Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 02:44 PM (UaxA0)

548 544 OT (does it matter at this point?)

Ted Nugent is going to be a guest at the SoTU.

I'd almost be tempted to tune in now instead of watching the Dog Show.
Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Assault Hobbit at February 11, 2013 02:43 PM (4df7R)

_________________

omg--wonder what Ted Nugent lyric he could yell from the cheap seats?

Posted by: CNN Your Global Warming Channel at February 11, 2013 02:44 PM (r2PLg)

549 ZOMG --- easily the worst ST/OS was the one with those crappy kids.


Oy. Just nuke from orbit for fuck's sake.

Posted by: eleven at February 11, 2013 02:44 PM (KXm42)

550 I'm a too pooped to pope.

Posted by: Pope Benedict at February 11, 2013 02:45 PM (z3Lez)

551

as though all it took to totally justify policy proposals or inexorably
knock down objections to current practice were to cite Formosus or the
Borgias or some other clearly anomalous figure, or to act as though the
relationship between the Papacy and the development of national kingship
in the middle ages is a clear parallel for how the Papacy should
conduct itself viz-a-viz modern nation states.



Wait . . . what?

Posted by: imp at February 11, 2013 02:46 PM (UaxA0)

552 The reason they don't go around excommunicating the lapsed is that it would cost them money. Catholic parishes, at least around here, are closing at a very fast rate. They would probably go out of business completely if they told most of the few who are still strict that their family membersare no longer welcome.
I consider myself a lapsed Catholic, andI don't accept communion on the rare occasions that I attend Mass. Anecdonatlly, I have heard family members say that that they don't need to go to confession, they could just forgive themselves. They take communion and do not think twice about it.
I had another relative who was trying to get their baby baptised. The poor kid was born out of wedlock, so the local pastor wouldn't consent to the baptism until the parents got married. Well, the relative blistered the pastor with "how dare you judge me?!?!?!??!" and ripped into him about child-molesting priests.
The baptism happened the following Saturday.

Posted by: Damn Sockpuppet at February 11, 2013 02:47 PM (YmPwQ)

553 I guess Pope Benedict will be the first zombie Pope. He ain't dead, but he's still walking around slowly. I denounce myself and will head to confession.

Posted by: no good deed at February 11, 2013 02:47 PM (mjR67)

554 Posted by: Miss Marple at February 11, 2013 02:43 PM (GoIUi


Even if he did show up he's over the papal voting age. In fact I don't think any of the cardinals over 80 do much official work.

Posted by: tsrblke (work) at February 11, 2013 02:48 PM (oG3dE)

555 It's a big deal. No way Benedict would do it
without good reason. Everything in his life leads me to believe he is
doing this for the good of the Church. This is not a man who has ever
exhibited either laziness or carelessness.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at February 11, 2013 02:37 PM (C8mVl)

Yep. People forget that John Paul II was able to accomplish as much as he did because of Pope Benedict's help and friendship. Benedict was never an attention seeker type Pope, he was the guy who kept everything moving and in order.

Posted by: Caustic at February 11, 2013 02:48 PM (/b8+5)

556 530 Before I found this announcement posted at the Vatican site, I read his most recent correspondences to the Patriarchs of Babylon, Assyria and Egypt. He must have someone in mind to replace him; and perhaps it's a great blessing to have a retirement rather than death during this tumultuous global era when the next Roman Pope is elected.

I agree with you that he's doing what he thinks best for his flock as well as the global ecumenical Christian bodies. And I find John Moody's "he never had a chance" account of this Pope as if a complete failure really overboard and uncalled for -- completely ignoring whatever behind the scenes advancement for the reunion that Benedict has done in the good grace of God. True, Benedict isn't John Paul. But then, neither is Jesus.

Posted by: panzernashorn at February 11, 2013 02:49 PM (MhA4j)

557 Piers Morgan is as Catholic as I'm British.

Posted by: The Ghost of Flannery O'Connor at February 11, 2013 02:49 PM (8V74Y)

558 ugh. Why even mention PMorgan in the same paragraph as a holy man?

Posted by: panzernashorn at February 11, 2013 02:51 PM (MhA4j)

559 Catholic parishes, at least around here, are closing at a very fast rate.
___
The suburbs are getting the Catholics who are fleeing the city.

Parishes out here are having to build bigger sanctuaries and schools. This is in more affluent suburbia. Blue collar suburban parishes aren't faring as well.

Posted by: kallisto at February 11, 2013 02:52 PM (jm/9g)

560 "The Church is trying to very discreetly say that he has dementia and/or is terminally ill?"

"The Church" isn't saying anything. He made this decision himself and shocked the shit out of everyone.

"Anyone who thinks this was a rash decision, and not something that was
discussed and prayed over by Benedict and his inner circle for a long
time, is either a fool or a Democrat. BIRM."

He talked it over with his brother, also a priest, months ago.

Posted by: Filly at February 11, 2013 02:58 PM (d2PVE)

561 Well, since we're doing Papal history, here's a strange story about the trial of the corspe of Pope Formosus....
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cadaver_Synod

Posted by: Damn Sockpuppet at February 11, 2013 02:58 PM (YmPwQ)

562 As a Catholic?

Doesn't Piers support mass genocide of infants? Tomorrow's breaking news:

Pier - "after having spent night a garage, as a car, I cause global warming"

Posted by: Comrade J at February 11, 2013 03:00 PM (Cq/0w)

563 Kallisto, you are in Philadelphia or the surrounding area if I recall correctly. I am in South Philly, one ofhe last bastions ofthe Church in the city. You are absolutely correct about the demoghraphic shift. Even with the influx of teh allegedly religious Latinos we're shuittering churches and merging schools like crazy.

Posted by: Damn Sockpuppet at February 11, 2013 03:02 PM (YmPwQ)

564 I was disappointed when my son went to Catholic school for K-8. He wanted to become Catholic, but we were Baptists (not regular church going though), they wouldn't allow him to become Catholic unless we converted.

I never heard of a church not accepting someone who was genuinely interested in their faith and being told that unless your parents convert too, you're screwed, even though we were happy that he chose a religion at all.

The church lost him for life, he basically said screw'em if they don't want him.

Posted by: Jaimo at February 11, 2013 03:04 PM (9U1OG)

565 ***Not having any photos released and the quick burial at sea does nothing but raise suspicions.***

It sort of does, doesn't it? Though not so much raise them as allows them to exist. I don't believe them - I think he's fish-food and that's done with, but a formal autopsy by multiple pathologists from various Coalition nations and a DNA sample or two put aside would have helped a lot.

As for Piers Morgan, if he were to fuck his own arse on national TV with a crucifix, he would not make more of a fool of himself than he has already done.

Comment #182 is gold - best of the Thread.

Posted by: perturbed at February 11, 2013 03:06 PM (u6Ueb)

566 "To be very blunt with you, we’re counting on all of you, the legitimate
news media to cover these discussions because the truth is that times
have changed,” Biden added, warning that people would continue to
“misrepresent” the White House's plans for gun control."

http://tinyurl.com/b8efytd

So who is "legitimate news media" according to the White House and who isn't "legitimate news media"?

Posted by: Caustic at February 11, 2013 03:09 PM (/b8+5)

567 The Pope needs to do a bunch of excommunications on his way out the door. Like an anti-pardon blitz.

Posted by: toby928© throws his 2 cents in at February 11, 2013 03:10 PM (evdj2)

568 word is that 'the pope' is packing up his red prada shoes and that he and his handsome, young, personal manservant are retiring to palm springs.

Posted by: el polacko at February 11, 2013 03:17 PM (OcNv4)

569 As a Catholic, I'm not buying this. Popes don't just quit because they're tired. What's going on here??





He's a Catholic like Pelosi is

Posted by: TheQuietMan at February 11, 2013 03:20 PM (1Jaio)

570 I remember John Paul II changing things up, he issued "UNIVERSI DOMINICI GREGIS"
http://tinyurl.com/3ldzm

Posted by: Caustic at February 11, 2013 03:30 PM (/b8+5)

571 Piers Morgan is a Catholic the way I'm a still a gymnast.

Posted by: richard mcenroe at February 11, 2013 03:35 PM (qvify)

572 B16 is giving up the papacy for lent.

Posted by: cheshirelion at February 11, 2013 03:51 PM (kBBnW)

573 Clearly Piers Morgan is both a creation and pawn of the Illuminati.

Posted by: Long Island at February 11, 2013 03:54 PM (hl8SI)

574 Jaimo - I do not know your complete situation, but I will speculate nonethesame. You said K-8, how old was your son? Did the Church say he was not yet of age to convert unless the parents converted? I could see that being the reason, though not for sure. I suspect there is a minimal age of some sort. Confirmation is not until HS, so would the Church allow someone to go through the sacraments sooner than that without their parents also being of the faith? That may be the answer.

I will say this, I don't disagree with the Church's teachings on morality and faith, but I do disagree with their administration from time to time. And each diocese and parish is different and may set up their own rules.

For instance, even though I went to a Catholic HS and took theology classes every semester and went on retreats, I still had to go through the confirmatoin program of my parish. My school was not affiliated with a parish. I thought then and still do, that this was dumb.

Anyway, sorry to hear it turned off your son. Maybe he will give it another chance later in life.

Posted by: SH at February 11, 2013 03:54 PM (gmeXX)

575 "So I had a bigger curious thought. If St. Malachy is the metal
plate/list of Popes guy I'm thinking of, and they made him a saint,
doesn't that mean the Church takes him seriously.
Or rather, won't the Cardinals take him seriously in making their pick?"

These are two separate issues, both of them leading to a big fat NO to Cardinals taking the "pope list" into account when selecting the next pontiff.

Catholics do not have to pray to the saints or believe in any apparitions, "private revelations," etc. As long as something isn't doctrine, we are permitted to pick and choose. In addition, just because a person is a saint, s/he is not automatically infallible. What separates a saint from your average ordinary dead Catholic is 1) an exemplary life 2) the canonization process, which demands at least one miracle to prove that the candidate is indeed in Heaven and in a position to intercede for the faithful.

Secondly, this is all pretty much a moot point, for as for Malachy, his "prophecies" have been pretty much deemed forgeries:
http://tinyurl.com/77yls

Posted by: Filly at February 11, 2013 04:10 PM (d2PVE)

576 Andrew Sullivan! Has the UK's other Catholic and expert on Canon Law/ gynecology chimed in yet? Because I am sure Pope Benedict really wants know to what Andy thinks. I bet the Pope is praying on that too!

Posted by: Long Island at February 11, 2013 04:35 PM (hl8SI)

577 People like Piers Morgan, Andrew Sullivan et.al., are Catholic In Name Only.






Posted by: Floyd Alsbach at February 11, 2013 04:54 PM (Ad13n)

578 Lefties can't imagine anyone giving up a position of power or influence. Just look atDemocrat senators who never retire and must be carried out of Congress.

Posted by: Decaf at February 11, 2013 04:56 PM (NmvvV)

579
Piers Morgan is a Catholic AND a gun-slinging serial murder's BFF?

Stellar CV, buckaroo!

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at February 11, 2013 05:44 PM (Jcd0S)

580 "As a catholic, who went to catholic school, with nuns, I don't recall them ever saying Pope was a job you could quit. They taught that preisthood, and I assume by default "Popehood" was not a divorcable relationship."

Uh, whatev, you do know that priests and nuns retire, don't you? Of course, they remain priests (just as B16 will) and nuns - but there is nothing in the religion that says they have to work until they drop. I'm a Catholic, who went to Catholic school, with nuns, and I know that.

Posted by: Donna V. at February 11, 2013 06:12 PM (BStAJ)

581 Die, you bloated fucking limey.

Posted by: Torqued at February 11, 2013 07:20 PM (AKS75)

582 Bwahahhahhahahahhaaa!!! Thanks. In needed that laugh. Especially the part about the spoons...

..and this: "Piers Morgan is a Catholic the way I'm a still a gymnast."

How about "Piers Morgan in a Catholic the same way Demi Moore is still married."


This ex-liberal now needs a cocktail. Night, George.

Posted by: exliberal at February 11, 2013 08:02 PM (leIQP)

583 test

Posted by: test at February 11, 2013 10:47 PM (cELsF)






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