Woman Drives Extra 850 Miles, and Two Extra Days, and Through Three Extra Countries, Because Her GPS Told Her To

But thankfully-- she was trying to find an 400 year old painting of Christ to "fix" it, but never made it.

No.

That's not true.

I made that up. That's just me trying to be silly. That's what we call a "callback."

The rest of it's true, though.

Sabine Moreau wanted to pick up a friend from a train station in Brussels, 47 miles from her home in Solre-sur-Sambre, the Daily Mail reported. But her GPS gave her the wrong directions, which she followed.

On her way to Croatia, Moreau passed through Germany, Austria, and Slovenia. After two days of driving, she finally stopped and called home.

Meanwhile, Belgian police were about to launch a search for Moreau when her son found out where she was, according to the Mail.

Sabine Moreau is 67 years dumb.

I don't know about you, but when I set out to make a trip that should take less than an hour, I usually check a map after the first 24 hours of wandering.

Coming soon: "To Catch a Predator" producers confronted with an unexpected but plausible defense. "The GPS told me to drive three states over to this house," the man insisted. "The GPS also told me to buy condoms, Zima, and fireworks."

via @katherinemiller


Recalculating

Recalculating...

recalculating...

recalculating...

Big Ben, Parliament...

recalculating...

Posted by: Ace at 05:02 PM



Comments

1 The GPS told me to get from Louisiana to Texas by way of Belgium! I don't understand why my seats are wet?!

Posted by: DangerGirl at January 16, 2013 05:03 PM (GrtrJ)

2 Belgians are seriously f*cked up--seriously; like, most or all of them

Posted by: open the pod bay doors, HAL at January 16, 2013 05:04 PM (Dll6b)

3 If you fuck with me, crazy stuff happens.

C. Darwin

Posted by: akula51 at January 16, 2013 05:04 PM (YesJa)

4 Loko? Is that a drink?
Beyblades?
Will have to look these up.

Posted by: fb at January 16, 2013 05:04 PM (JVEmw)

5
The rape of the Sabine was by me.

Posted by: GPS at January 16, 2013 05:05 PM (p/cQy)

6 I feel so out of it. What the hell is a Beyblade?

Posted by: joncelli at January 16, 2013 05:06 PM (RD7QR)

7 If she were an American, she'd be Exhibit #1: Obamabot.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at January 16, 2013 05:06 PM (UOM48)

8 re-cast from the previously ( now dead ) thread, FWIW ( not much ):


Molotov was a fake name, like Stalin and Lenin and Tito and all those commies

Posted by: open the pod bay doors, HAL at January 16, 2013 05:06 PM (Dll6b)

9 At least she's alive. She could have decided to use "auto-pilot", i.e, cruise control, and tried to nap on the way.

Posted by: eureka! at January 16, 2013 05:06 PM (HPRku)

10 A while back an elderly Atlanta woman got on the Perimeter and drove around...and around...and around...until she finally ran out of gas.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at January 16, 2013 05:07 PM (UOM48)

11 Oh, and GPS owners, be sure to update your maps. I didn't and almost got sent up a closed ramp in Orlando.

Posted by: joncelli at January 16, 2013 05:07 PM (RD7QR)

12 all is proceeding as I have forseen

moo-who-wah-ha-ha-ha ....

Posted by: - Garmin at January 16, 2013 05:07 PM (RuUvx)

13 If you GPS told you to drive off of a cliff, would you do that too?

Posted by: Mama Moreau at January 16, 2013 05:08 PM (w3+gB)

14 Good thing she wasn't using iPhone navigation. They'd be fishing her car out of the Atlantic by now.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at January 16, 2013 05:08 PM (SY2Kh)

15 I'm old school. I study a map before I leave home. Have never gotten lost, even driving cross country.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at January 16, 2013 05:08 PM (UOM48)

16 How do you say "Amber Alert" in Belgianese?

What a stupid Phlegm/Sprout.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at January 16, 2013 05:09 PM (XkWWK)

17 a few years ago, the Rijkswacht turned up a massive pedo ring in Belgium--mostly among politicians and civil servants


reached up to the highest levels of government, it did

Posted by: open the pod bay doors, HAL at January 16, 2013 05:09 PM (Dll6b)

18 Damn, I wish I'd thought of this!

Posted by: Lisa Nowak at January 16, 2013 05:09 PM (C/NnJ)

19 The obvious conclusion is that this poor women was suffering from an oppressive lack of access to condoms public transportation.

Posted by: fb at January 16, 2013 05:10 PM (JVEmw)

20 17 reached up to the highest levels of government, it did
Posted by: open the pod bay doors, HAL at January 16, 2013 05:09 PM (Dll6b)

ISWYDT

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at January 16, 2013 05:10 PM (XkWWK)

21 16
How do you say "Amber Alert" in Belgianese?




And Austrian? *rests chin on skinny hand and stares off wistfully*

Posted by: King Baracka Vomitus I at January 16, 2013 05:10 PM (UOM48)

22 I remember going on a sales call in the early days of Mapquest through the hinterlands of Tennessee, complete with cars on cinderblocks and other stuff from the Deliverance scenery catalog. When we arrived about 1 hour late to the meeting, it turned out there was a new highway with an exit about 400 yards away.

But the wonderful part was, when we told the receptionist where we'd gone, she laughed and announced to the entire office, "Hey y'all, these guys went through Chigger Holler!"

Posted by: jakeman at January 16, 2013 05:10 PM (96M6e)

23 Sounds like No-He-Never-Got-Out-Charlie from that song.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at January 16, 2013 05:11 PM (XkWWK)

24 YOU MISSED YOUR EXIT, TURN RIGHT NOW!!!!!

Posted by: Mayhem at January 16, 2013 05:11 PM (16UJh)

25 My GPS told me to claim that my fake girlfriend died in September in order to become an NFL star.

And it would have worked, too, if not for those damn SEC schools!

Posted by: Manti Te'o at January 16, 2013 05:11 PM (e0xKF)

26 One time I was driving home from New Jersey back to Washington DC. I was sort of half paying attention to what the GPS was telling me, and before I knew it I was somehow on the George Washington Bridge headed into New York City - which is not exactly on the way to DC from Jersey. To make matter worse, the GPS then told me to take the Tappan Zee Bridge - you know, a half hour NORTH of New York - to get back to Jersey and then south to DC. Luckily I wasn't that dumb.

But yeah, don't always listen to the GPS.

Posted by: Paul Zummo at January 16, 2013 05:11 PM (Ud5vq)

27 OMG. I want to punch Blob Beckel again. He just said Sidwell Friends School doesn't have armed guards.


Posted by: Jane D'oh at January 16, 2013 05:11 PM (UOM48)

28 Assault GPS.

Posted by: The Mega Independent at January 16, 2013 05:12 PM (46pA5)

29 I see the European schools have done a bang-up job since WWII teaching geography.

Posted by: logprof at January 16, 2013 05:12 PM (StDOM)

30 I'm old school. I study a map before I leave home. Have never gotten lost, even driving cross country.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at January 16, 2013 05:08 PM (UOM4
You have clearly never driven in rural southern Missouri then.At the intersection of "Z" "ZZ" (and, if only, Top) I stopped pulled out my map and asked "WTF? Aren't I looking for Highway QS?" (which it turns out was just a few miles up the road, but still the roads make no sense here.)Thankfully a local pitstop/general store had opened up recently near where I was, and had hung out signs even miles away I eventually saw and followed.(Also this was after I got off the rock "roads" that were identified by barrels at the intersections and on to state highways.)Actually when I stopped in the store to get a soda, the lady who owned it was chatting with me and said "You went WHERE?!" Turns out even locals don't go down those roads. Well some do, but they're meth makers.

Posted by: tsrblke at January 16, 2013 05:12 PM (GaqMa)

31 On her way to Croatia, Moreau passed through Germany, Austria, and Slovenia.

Vaguely jealous. That sounds like an awesome trip.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at January 16, 2013 05:13 PM (ZKzrr)

32 You can get stuck on the Cross Bronx Expressway for days even when your GPS is working

Posted by: Nevergiveup at January 16, 2013 05:13 PM (jE38p)

33 These are the times that try men's souls
In the course of our nation's history
The people of Boston have rallied bravely
Whenever the rights of men have been threatened

Today a new crisis has arisen
The Metropolitan Transit Authority, better known as they MTA
Is attempting to levy a burdensome tax on the population
In the form of a subway fare increase
Citizens, hear me out, this could happen to you

Well, let me tell you of the story of a man named Charlie
On a tragic and fateful day
He put ten cents in his pocket, kissed his wife and family
Went to ride on the MTA

Well, did he ever return?
No he never returned and his fate is still unlearned
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston
And he's the man who never returned

Charlie handed in his dime at the Kendall Square station
And he changed for Jamaica Plain
When he got there the conductor told him, "One more nickel"
Charlie couldn't get off of that train

But did he ever return?
No he never returned and his fate is still unlearned
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston
He's the man who never returned

Now, all night long Charlie rides through the station
Crying, "What will become of me?
How can I afford to see my sister in Chelsea
Or my cousin in Roxbury?"

But did he ever return?
No he never returned and his fate is still unlearned
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston
He's the man who never returned

Charlie's wife goes down to the Sculley Square station
Every day at quarter past two
And through the open window she hands Charlie a sandwich
As the train comes rumbling through

But did he ever return?
No he never returned and his fate is still unlearned
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston
He's the man who never returned
Pick it Davey, kind of hurts my fingers

Now, ye citizens of Boston
Don't you think it's a scandal
How the people have to pay and pay?
Fight the fare increase, vote for George O'Brian
Get poor Charlie off the MTA

Or else he'll never return
No he'll never return and his fate is still unlearned
He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston
He's the man who never returned

He's the man who never returned
He's the man who never returned
He's the man who never returned
Ain't you, Charlie?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at January 16, 2013 05:13 PM (XkWWK)

34 Children are Obama's GPS for policy.

"Did you fix the hole yet Daddy?"

Posted by: Opus An Arcus at January 16, 2013 05:13 PM (OQAZC)

35 That's how I ended up in Chile while hiking the Appalachian Trail!

Posted by: Mark Sanford at January 16, 2013 05:13 PM (r2PLg)

36 Weapons of mass transportation

Posted by: Lurkasaurus at January 16, 2013 05:13 PM (0K4Xj)

37 Wait a minute. A couple of things jump out.

Brussels is the Capital of Belgium was where she was heading.
She lives like 50 miles away. 50 miles away from her NATION'S CAPITAL, oh, and coincidentally the Capital of the European Union and can't get to it without her electronic buddy giving her directions.

That would be like living in Annapolis, asking your GPS to go to DC and not figuring out you had a problem until you reached Kansas City.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose is Shrugging at January 16, 2013 05:14 PM (0q2P7)

38 I saw a story not too long ago of an elderly couple in CA who drove out into the desert following the GPS and almost died. If they had not had a cell phone with them that could still reach anywhere they would have.


This appears to happen a lot.

Posted by: Vic at January 16, 2013 05:14 PM (53z96)

39 Weapons of mass transportation/i]

Indeed. Think of all the global warmingz she created.

Posted by: jakeman at January 16, 2013 05:14 PM (96M6e)

40 Our GPS once sent us over Loveland Pass. At night. In the middle of winter.

Turns out that it would have gotten us there, but there was an easier route. Turning left.out of our hotel and driving 2 miles..

Posted by: Lauren at January 16, 2013 05:15 PM (wsGWu)

41 Posted by: tsrblke at January 16, 2013 05:12 PM (GaqMa



Does driving from Savannah to Ft. Leonard Wood (St. Roberts, MO) count?

Posted by: Jane D'oh at January 16, 2013 05:15 PM (UOM48)

42 In the future, every idiot will be famous for 850 miles.

Posted by: The Mega Independent at January 16, 2013 05:15 PM (46pA5)

43 BARRELLLLL!!!!

Posted by: jakeman at January 16, 2013 05:15 PM (96M6e)

44 I'm sure she drove the whole way at 45mph in the left lane with her turn signal on.

Posted by: Jean at January 16, 2013 05:15 PM (2x+V2)

45 Once you cross the Hudson River into New Jersey, abandon all hope of ever finding your way anywhere. It has the most misleading signs and maddening divided roads, so that if you miss a turn, you have to drive minimum of 5 miles to get off and go back.

Figures it's the home of Crispy Cream Christie.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at January 16, 2013 05:15 PM (XkWWK)

46 Whenever I read these kinds of stories about people who are amazingly bonecrushingly stupid, I stop and I remind myself with the comforting thought that in a universal-franchise democracy, their vote carries every bit as much weight as mine does. Yeah, this woman is in Belgium, but she could as easily be an American. We have similar stories every few weeks.

Some time before I die, I'd like to live in a country where voting rights are intelligence-weighted. It will never happen in America. But America is already past its sell-by date. Perhaps one of the newer smaller nations that will emerge from the wreckage of the USA will implement such a sensible rule.


Posted by: torquewrench at January 16, 2013 05:16 PM (gqT4g)

47 PERSISTENCE!!!

Posted by: phoenixgirl so done with the GOP at January 16, 2013 05:16 PM (GVxQo)

48 I'm old school. I study a map before I leave home. Have never gotten lost, even driving cross country.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at January 16, 2013 05:08 PM (UOM4


---------------------------------------------------


Give me a military map, a compass, and, at least one landmark, and I can locate exactly where I am within ten feet. Don't need no GPS.

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2013 05:17 PM (MBJe8)

49 How many times did she stop for gas?

Posted by: The Mega Independent at January 16, 2013 05:17 PM (46pA5)

50 Once you cross the Hudson River into New Jersey, abandon all hope of ever finding your way anywhere. It has the most misleading signs and maddening divided roads, so that if you miss a turn, you have to drive minimum of 5 miles to get off and go back.

Figures it's the home of Crispy Cream Christie.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at January 16, 2013 05:15 PM (XkWWK)


And you think the signs in NYC/NY are good? And let's not talk about the pot holes in NYC

Posted by: Nevergiveup at January 16, 2013 05:17 PM (jE38p)

51 I get out of work to take vacations like this all the time.

Posted by: Dr Spank at January 16, 2013 05:17 PM (Rq+Vo)

52 Did Mrs. Brussel Sprout notice something odd when she was stopped at at least 2 different border crossings?!

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at January 16, 2013 05:17 PM (XkWWK)

53 Perhaps one of the newer smaller nations that will emerge from the wreckage of the USA will implement such a sensible rule.



Sounds as if you're pining for Alextopia. Stupidity will not be tolerated. *Looks around to see if she's here*

Posted by: Jane D'oh at January 16, 2013 05:18 PM (UOM48)

54 Maybe she thought a German Blitzkrieg was on her tail. How else would you explain all those extra border crossings that weren't there before?

Posted by: bonhomme at January 16, 2013 05:18 PM (9PrpA)

55 Google "Death by GPS" for the unfortunate stories

Posted by: Jean at January 16, 2013 05:18 PM (2x+V2)

56 Let me guess... she was waiting until after the Olympics to unleash her Death Star of going the right way.

Posted by: The Mega Independent at January 16, 2013 05:18 PM (46pA5)

57 She's liberal I assume?

Posted by: Nevergiveup at January 16, 2013 05:18 PM (jE38p)

58 From what I have seen of our GPS system it is great for the open highway and major roads in town. But it is not worth a shit for out of the way roads and residential areas. What I have found is using a print out of google maps along with the GPS is the best way to get to an out of the way spot you haven't been to yet.

Posted by: Vic at January 16, 2013 05:18 PM (53z96)

59 And you think the signs in NYC/NY are good? And let's not talk about the pot holes in NYC
Posted by: Nevergiveup at January 16, 2013 05:17 PM (jE38p)

I didn't say they were, but it is easier to find your way in Manhattan. Queens on the other hand is a freaking nightmare.

You want pot holes? Try L.A. Frickin' bomb craters in Dresden were smaller.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at January 16, 2013 05:19 PM (XkWWK)

60 Did Mrs. Brussel Sprout notice something odd when she was stopped at at least 2 different border crossings?!

Border crossings? It's the EU, baby!

When I went from DE to Ö in Nov, only trucks had to stop. On the way back, there wasn't even a sign.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at January 16, 2013 05:19 PM (ZKzrr)

61
The GPS said the Grand Ballroom was the bathroom.

Posted by: Al Roker at January 16, 2013 05:19 PM (p/cQy)

62 I've read about this happening with the elderly without GPS being involved.

I kinda sorta remember they said it was caused by a mild form of dementia where the elderly person has a diminished spatial awareness or something.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at January 16, 2013 05:19 PM (SY2Kh)

63 I think of my elderly father who began to get lost driving to the store at night, and would find himself a hundred miles away. Heartbreaking. Particularly since he used to be a long-line trucker. Maybe the poor woman was just mentally impaired do to age.

Nah. She's Belgian. Let's kick her in her teeth!

Posted by: kathysaysso at January 16, 2013 05:19 PM (y5uWA)

64 DUE to age

Posted by: kathysaysso at January 16, 2013 05:20 PM (y5uWA)

65 Watching Bob Beckel talk his trash. Wonder if it hurts to be that fuckin' stupid.

Posted by: Libra at January 16, 2013 05:20 PM (cMWZ+)

66 O/T Sorry, but I was on conservative website and it is a picture of M Obama saying January 19 is a day of service and how to sign up. What is January 19?

I have a paid subscription to this magazine's site and was annoyed to see her on it!

Posted by: CarolT at January 16, 2013 05:20 PM (z4WKX)

67 I used a GPS once to help find the G spot. I also got misdirected and lost for two days.

Posted by: polynikes at January 16, 2013 05:20 PM (m2CN7)

68 My husband's iPhone app tried to send us the wrong way down a one-way street a couple of weeks ago. "TURN LEFT!!!!" Um, no.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at January 16, 2013 05:20 PM (UOM48)

69 Queens on the other hand is a freaking nightmare.


I used my GPS to go somewhere in ChinaTown in Queens down past Citi Park. The GPS gets ya close and then says: "Your on your own"!

Posted by: Nevergiveup at January 16, 2013 05:20 PM (jE38p)

70 Seriously, someone click the link in my name.

Notre Dame LB Manti Te'o helped ride a story about his dead girlfriend into a runner-up bid for the Heisman. Deadspin broke the story, and ND is now admitting, that the whole thing was a hoax.

ND's claim is that "Te'o and his family were the victims of a cruel hoax" despite Te'o telling everyone that he and the girl involved had met in person after the ND-Stanford game last season.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at January 16, 2013 05:20 PM (e0xKF)

71 60 Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at January 16, 2013 05:19 PM (ZKzrr)


Okay, but the language changed from Phlegmish to Deutsch-ish, nein?

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at January 16, 2013 05:21 PM (XkWWK)

72 >>>Some time before I die, I'd like to live in a country where voting
rights are intelligence-weighted. It will never happen in America. But
America is already past its sell-by date.

In simpler times, math, Darwin, and high velocity lead sorted the less intelligent from the voting class.

Posted by: Fritz at January 16, 2013 05:21 PM (w3+gB)

73 yeah, no more border crossings within most of the EU for personal vehicles


The Swiss ( not in the EU ) have border posts, but there's chocolate and every guy has an ASSAULT rifle at home

Posted by: open the pod bay doors, HAL at January 16, 2013 05:21 PM (Dll6b)

74 >>>Did Mrs. Brussel Sprout notice something odd when she was stopped at at least 2 different border crossings?!

Europe ain't the US. Customs can jack your sh*t any time they want. They don't even man their borders. They just pick random people off the road and search them without warrant.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose is Shrugging at January 16, 2013 05:21 PM (0q2P7)

75 Torque wrench, I think we got where we are because of the "intelligent" people

Posted by: Jean at January 16, 2013 05:22 PM (2x+V2)

76 From what I have seen of our GPS system it is great for the open highway and major roads in town. But it is not worth a shit for out of the way roads and residential areas. What I have found is using a print out of google maps along with the GPS is the best way to get to an out of the way spot you haven't been to yet.
Posted by: Vic at January 16, 2013 05:18 PM (53z96)


--------------------------------------------------


I don't know. I like wandering around aimlessly listening to that buzzy female voice bitch at me. I almost feel married again.

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2013 05:22 PM (MBJe8)

77 69 I used my GPS to go somewhere in ChinaTown in Queens down past Citi Park. The GPS gets ya close and then says: "Your on your own"!
Posted by: Nevergiveup at January 16, 2013 05:20 PM (jE38p)


You're from Queens? I'm from normal parents.


Seriously, the best food is in that borough. Glad to give a tour to any moron who wants an adventure and international eats of all kinds.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at January 16, 2013 05:22 PM (XkWWK)

78 It's not all about the destination, but the journey taken to get there.

Posted by: Sisterhood of the Travelling Plants at January 16, 2013 05:22 PM (I88Jc)

79 What the hell can you do for two days that is THAT distracting? Hell, even at 67, I can't imagine fapping taking more than 5 minutes.

Posted by: rickb223 at January 16, 2013 05:22 PM (6B1u5)

80 What is January 19?

Gun Appreciation Day. Insert Mooch's biceps joke here.

Okay, but the language changed from Phlegmish to Deutsch-ish, nein?

Pictograms, my friend. And it's all pretty much Turkish at the Tankstelle.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at January 16, 2013 05:23 PM (ZKzrr)

81 79 What the hell can you do for two days that is THAT distracting? Hell, even at 67, I can't imagine fapping taking more than 5 minutes.

---

More like "who can you do for two days that is that distracting?".

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at January 16, 2013 05:23 PM (e0xKF)

82 We may need border crossings, "vehicle inspection stations", here soon.

Posted by: Jean at January 16, 2013 05:23 PM (2x+V2)

83 "There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way."

Shit Buddah said, volume 864

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at January 16, 2013 05:23 PM (XkWWK)

84 I asked my grandfather to pick up my car from the mechanic after completed repairs since I was at work. I temporarily lived at their home when I moved to NYC. Later found out that he had taken someone else's car. The shop finally figured it out since my car was still there. Gramps was 80.

Posted by: polynikes at January 16, 2013 05:24 PM (m2CN7)

85 I refuse to own a GPS. Partly out of being too cheap to purchase something I don't really need, and partly out of irritation with people who cannot make change without a readout to calculate it, cannot discuss history without having to google it, and people who cannot listen to directions or read a map.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at January 16, 2013 05:24 PM (GfHSl)

86 Posted by: J.J. Sefton at January 16, 2013 05:13 PM (XkWWK)

My folks were Kingston Trio fans ...

I love that song!

Posted by: Adriane... at January 16, 2013 05:24 PM (TvO05)

87 Isn't Jan. 19 a "national service day?" under Lord Oblahblah and Lady Mooch?

I'll expect to see every dumbass Obamabot out picking up trash off the sides of the roads and serving their master and mistress. I'll be deeply disappointed if I don't.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at January 16, 2013 05:25 PM (UOM48)

88 Bookmarked for the next person who tells me how much smarter Europeans are than Americans.

Posted by: MMW at January 16, 2013 05:25 PM (kt/h1)

89 My good friend would call her a "DAB." (dumbass bitch)

Posted by: bicentennialguy at January 16, 2013 05:25 PM (k6b4q)

90 What we really need to ask is, quo bono? Did her "friend" at the "train station" need an alibi?

"What, officer, I swear I was at the train station for two days waiting for my friend to pick me up."

"Shyeah right, two whole days, where does this "friend" live? America?"

"Oh, here she is now, tell the nice officer why it took you two whole days to drive 47 miles."

"Umm . . . DAMN GPS took me to SLOVENIA!"

Fin.

Posted by: bonhomme at January 16, 2013 05:25 PM (niMr9)

91 The old "the gps screwed up" excuse. No grandma, you put in the wrong address.

Posted by: Whatev at January 16, 2013 05:27 PM (lreFA)

92 When I'm driving anything over 3 hours and I need a good meal and a warm toilet seat

Posted by: Nevergiveup at January 16, 2013 05:27 PM (jE38p)

93 What are you doing, Dave? I said turn left at Saturn.

Posted by: HAL 9000 at January 16, 2013 05:27 PM (ORGYc)

94 Hey, I've been there.

St. Christopher gave me bad directions once and I ended up driving from Manhattan to Rochester without realizing it.

Posted by: Dr. Denis Leary at January 16, 2013 05:27 PM (e0xKF)

95 Just to "pile on" this poor schmuck;

Look at your map of the world. Let's pick San Francisco because it's like Belgium.

So, you're in Fremont, in the bay area. You need to go to Frisco (they hate that word ). Now, I will say the streets around there are badly labeled and the roads are not well-designed, but how many people would realize there was a problem when they arrived in Victoria, British Columbia, having just crossed over on the ferry from Seattle? Well, okay, Port Angeles, not Seattle.

This is not "Terror GPS failure," this is "person who needs assisted living arrangements on the loose."

How many refueling stops did this involve?

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at January 16, 2013 05:27 PM (bxiXv)

96 And the Thread Stompin' Battle between CAC and Ace is on again!

Posted by: Jane D'oh at January 16, 2013 05:27 PM (UOM48)

97 Maps. How do they fucking work?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, who did not vote for this shit. at January 16, 2013 05:27 PM (yiIja)

98 >>>Some time before I die, I'd like to live in a country where voting

rights are intelligence-weighted.

Hmmm. Interesting concept.
Graduating HS gets you your first vote.
Every two years of military service gets you a vote.
Set up a tiered subject mastery of humanities and math/science separately. Three tiers each. You get a vote for every tier you achieve but you can't go to the next tier in a discipline until you achieve a matched tier in the opposite discipline. Keep people from being lopsided.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose is Shrugging at January 16, 2013 05:28 PM (0q2P7)

99 One of my daughters, who is otherwise extremely bright, could do something this stupid. Okay, not for two days and 850 miles, but close to it.
She has no sense of direction and either can't or won't read a map. And she will NOT stop and ask for directions.
One time she was driving from Pittsburgh to West Virginia and ended up in Erie. She didn't even know what state she was in. There she is driving along like an imbecile saying to herself, "Gee. Where did the mountains go? There used to be mountains here." Scares me to death.

Posted by: Margarita DeVille at January 16, 2013 05:28 PM (C8mVl)

100 @15 - Me too. People always ask me if I have a GPS and I say, "No, I know where I am going before I get into the car."

Posted by: bicentennialguy at January 16, 2013 05:28 PM (k6b4q)

101 I had to look up beyblades and four loko. I knew what condoms were, though.

Posted by: JustLikeDavidHasselhoff at January 16, 2013 05:28 PM (71iUa)

102 I just Googled "elderly lost drove". This sort of thing looks to be pretty common with the elderly.

There's a ton of stories out there about elderly drivers ending up hundreds of miles away for what should've been a very short trip- sometimes only a mile or two.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at January 16, 2013 05:30 PM (SY2Kh)

103 Lancaster PA or Lancaster CA?


Hmmmmm

Posted by: Lurkasaurus at January 16, 2013 05:30 PM (0K4Xj)

104 88 Bookmarked for the next person who tells me how much smarter Europeans are than Americans.

Posted by: MMW at January 16, 2013 05:25 PM (kt/h1)


What the British tell Americans: "Americans are all fat and we're not!"

What the British tell the British: "Obesity is a major health crisis in Britain."

It's the Japanese "Honnei-Tatumai" thing. What you tell outsiders vs. the truth.

Same with Europeans and stupidity. They project an image of contemplative intellectualism, whereas in actuality they're all sitting in shabby apartments drooling into their coffee and playing games on their cellphones.

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at January 16, 2013 05:30 PM (bxiXv)

105 "It said, "Next right turn, Dwight!"

Posted by: Michael Scott at January 16, 2013 05:30 PM (BAS5M)

106 Posted by: MikeTheMoose is Shrugging at January 16, 2013 05:28 PM (0q2P7)

Eh, the libs/progs will just figure out a way to game the system. They will just weasel their way into positions that hand out the certificates.

Posted by: The Mega Independent at January 16, 2013 05:30 PM (46pA5)

107 I knew a guy that went the wrong way to pick up a friend twenty miles away and ended up in another state over a hundred miles away. I guess we shouldn't have been surprised when he actually flunked out of college while getting a degree in education a couple of years later.

Posted by: JustLikeDavidHasselhoff at January 16, 2013 05:33 PM (71iUa)

108 Eh, the libs/progs will just figure out a way to game the system. They will just weasel their way into positions that hand out the certificates.

Posted by: The Mega Independent at January 16, 2013 05:30 PM (46p


So, no change, then?

Posted by: Merovign, Dark Lord of the Sith at January 16, 2013 05:33 PM (bxiXv)

109 This type of thing is why they don't let Biden drive a car.

Posted by: Whatev at January 16, 2013 05:34 PM (lreFA)

110 I have no sense of direction myself. My wife gets unhappy when I use the GPS when driving. The solution in our car is when I get fuzzy on where to go is she directs me. It must be frustrating for her, and it's not fun for me, but that's how we handle that problem. Another solution we use is she'll drive if I don't know the way.

Posted by: bonhomme at January 16, 2013 05:34 PM (4QSOR)

111 109 This type of thing is why they don't let Biden drive a car.

---

Things are bad enough with him getting chauffered. His motorcade has a body count equal to or greater than Ted Kennedy's Oldsmobile.

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at January 16, 2013 05:37 PM (e0xKF)

112 My GPS lady is the most verbally abused assistant on the planet.

Posted by: Whatev at January 16, 2013 05:38 PM (lreFA)

113 new one

Posted by: Vic at January 16, 2013 05:38 PM (53z96)

114 I goofed on Four Loko and Beyblades. I wanted to pick a drink young people would like and a boy's toy, but I didn't want to go with the obvious "Zima" (is that even still a thing?).

Anyway, I tried to be funny by being specific and nonobvious but I picked things most people haven't even heard of, so I failed.

Beyblades are apparently a thing, though. But I think you need to be ten years old to know about it.

Posted by: ace at January 16, 2013 05:38 PM (LCRYB)

115 The first word in the headline is all the explanation needed.

Posted by: weew, who has observed that every shitty driver on his daily commute is a chick at January 16, 2013 05:39 PM (ElfHn)

116 And she used her Obama phone to call for help right?

Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at January 16, 2013 05:40 PM (Qgqzq)

117 52 Did Mrs. Brussel Sprout notice something odd when she was stopped at at least 2 different border crossings?!

----------

IIUI, it's all one big, happy Europe these days. Tanks could drive from Berlin to Paris without being bothered by border crossing.

Posted by: Citizen Anachronda at January 16, 2013 05:40 PM (NmR1a)

118 A couple of years ago, I purchased an update to my on-board, in-dash DVD-based GPS. I had no problems with misdirection prior to the update, but now the system seems brain damaged. When driving through Jacksonville, FL to get to Orlando, it will often times want me to drive 100+ miles up the panhandle, make a U-turn, and drive the 100+ miles back to the I-95/295 junction.

When I do purchase a new vehicle, I'll certainly stay away from the on-board systems due to the inherent nannyism. I really don't want 80%+ of the functionality taken away from me while I'm moving (5mph is all it takes for the buttons to grey-out). But, back in 2000 when I bought the car, it was really cool.

Posted by: Sandra Fluke's solid gold diaphragm at January 16, 2013 05:41 PM (7xeJQ)

119 Tanks could drive from Berlin to Paris without being bothered by border crossing.

---

Didn't have much trouble doing the same thing back in in '38.

Posted by: Erwin Rommel at January 16, 2013 05:42 PM (e0xKF)

120 Zima: isn't that used to get blood stains out of dress shirts?

Posted by: Foghorn Leghorn at January 16, 2013 05:43 PM (Qgqzq)

121 I feel stupid. I know what Beyblades and Four Loko are.

Posted by: L, elle at January 16, 2013 05:43 PM (0PiQ4)

122 One of my daughters, who is otherwise extremely bright, could do something this stupid. Okay, not for two days and 850 miles, but close to it. She has no sense of direction and either can't or won't read a map. And she will NOT stop and ask for directions. One time she was driving from Pittsburgh to West Virginia and ended up in Erie. She didn't even know what state she was in. There she is driving along like an imbecile saying to herself, "Gee. Where did the mountains go? There used to be mountains here." Scares me to death.
Posted by: Margarita DeVille at January 16, 2013 05:28 PM (C8mVl)


--------------------------------------------


I hope she doesn't get on one of those lonely highways and an old evil looking panel truck forces her off the road. Then her boyfriend gets stupid and goes down an old culvert looking for the origin of an evil voice. It could happen.

Seriously though. I'd pull her licence until she decided to wise up. She really could find herself in a lot of trouble one of these days.


Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2013 05:43 PM (MBJe8)

123 perhap gps didn't speak french , dutch or german?
maybe Obama sent the unit to her?

Posted by: ette at January 16, 2013 05:45 PM (nqBYe)

124 Bless her heart.

Posted by: Count de Monet at January 16, 2013 05:46 PM (BAS5M)

125 A couple of years ago, I purchased an update to my on-board, in-dash DVD-based GPS. I had no problems with misdirection prior to the update, but now the system seems brain damaged. When driving through Jacksonville, FL to get to Orlando, it will often times want me to drive 100+ miles up the panhandle, make a U-turn, and drive the 100+ miles back to the I-95/295 junction.


--------------------------------------------------------


It's the evil oil companies scrambling the signals so you'll burn more gas.

Posted by: Soona at January 16, 2013 05:46 PM (MBJe8)

126 o-sure everybody has moved on?

Posted by: ette at January 16, 2013 05:46 PM (nqBYe)

127 "On her way to Croatia, Moreau passed through Germany, Austria, and Slovenia."

Sounds a lot like Napoleon's journey to Moscow.

Posted by: Keith Arnold at January 16, 2013 05:46 PM (n4EDK)

128 shew ok.

Posted by: ette at January 16, 2013 05:46 PM (nqBYe)

129
Oh, come on! She's pushing 70 and is probably suffering from dementia.

Posted by: waldo at January 16, 2013 05:47 PM (H96hE)

130 I still don't know what Beyblades and Four Loko are. They both sound too dumb to want to know what they are.

Posted by: Whatev at January 16, 2013 05:47 PM (lreFA)

131 Whatev , They might be cartoons.

Posted by: ette at January 16, 2013 05:48 PM (nqBYe)

132 GPS error? If euro-socialism was more intrusive, this wouldn't happen.

Posted by: locomotivebreath1901 at January 16, 2013 05:49 PM (tUT9B)

133 or an alcohol drink?

or what you become after you drink?

Posted by: ette at January 16, 2013 05:49 PM (nqBYe)

134 I can't believe i took her 2 days to stop to use the restroom and ask where she was.



i might be adding false info.

Posted by: ette at January 16, 2013 05:50 PM (nqBYe)

135 fine, i'll move on to next post.

Posted by: ette at January 16, 2013 05:51 PM (nqBYe)

136 And they say MEN are too proud to stop and ask for directions. Two days? Hell, I've never gone more than half an hour without realizing I was lost. I may be eccentric, but two days is just plain ignorant.

Posted by: Keith Arnold at January 16, 2013 05:51 PM (n4EDK)

137 Ette: she was probably wearing adult diapers. May have been one of those jealous astronauts.

Posted by: Keith Arnold at January 16, 2013 05:52 PM (n4EDK)

138 Beyblades are apparently a thing, though. But I think you need to be ten years old to know about it.
Posted by: ace at January 16, 2013 05:38 PM


My son, at 10, was into them and they are pretty cool. Great idea and someone got rich on them. The basic idea was a rip off of the old "Battling Tops", a set I still have and have played with my son and his buddies (I'm 52). Oh, the good old days.

Posted by: eureka! at January 16, 2013 05:55 PM (HPRku)

139 119
Tanks could drive from Berlin to Paris without being bothered by border crossing.



---



Didn't have much trouble doing the same thing back in in '38.



Posted by: Erwin Rommel

Except for the fact that they didn't do that until 1940.

Posted by: SFGoth at January 16, 2013 05:57 PM (dZ756)

140 Can't wait for self-driving cars to get here.

Posted by: malclave at January 16, 2013 06:00 PM (OCRaO)

141 One time I was driving home from New Jersey back to
Washington DC. I was sort of half paying attention to what the GPS was
telling me, and before I knew it I was somehow on the George Washington
Bridge headed into New York City - which is not exactly on the way to DC
from Jersey. To make matter worse, the GPS then told me to take the
Tappan Zee Bridge - you know, a half hour NORTH of New York - to get
back to Jersey and then south to DC. Luckily I wasn't that dumb.


But yeah, don't always listen to the GPS.
Posted by: Paul Zummo at January 16, 2013 05:11 PM (Ud5vq)



Jeez, and here I thought everyone knew the only way to get to Jersey other than the PATH train is by going over the GWB. Dumbass.

Posted by: Your MFM Betters at January 16, 2013 06:06 PM (hpYnL)

142 Usually it's men who refuse to stop and ask for directions/

Posted by: SFC MAC at January 16, 2013 07:48 PM (TLbgU)

143 Vodka, cigarettes and fireworks.
And *that* would be a callback.

(in reference to the Seinfeld show where Elaine falls for the video rental guy who turns out to be a kid who asks her for ... oh nevermind)

Posted by: Endeavor to Persevere at January 16, 2013 10:32 PM (zZJJp)

144
You can still buy Zima????

Posted by: JetCityqueen at January 16, 2013 10:51 PM (ZWVET)

145 I personally believe that Kingdom of Belgians are unable to do so because some people out there in their country don't have maps, and I believe that their education, like such as in South Africa and the Iraq, everywhere like such as. And I believe that they should their education over there in Belgium should help Belgium, or should help South Africa, and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so they will be able to build up a future for their senior citizens.

Posted by: Joshua at January 17, 2013 06:49 PM (oCZ4e)

146 The next time you hear a statistic about the percentage of Europeans who have traveled to foreign countries, compared to the percentage of Americans, remember that this woman is included among the Europeans who have traveled to foreign countries.

I have only been to a few foreign countries, but at least I went to all of them intentionally.

Posted by: Joshua at January 17, 2013 06:57 PM (oCZ4e)






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