The Woman Who Said "Don't Hate Me Because I'm Beautiful" Pens a Sequel:
See, You Hate Me, This Proves I'm Beautiful, Like I Said The First Time

Bumped. I posted this late last night. Seems kind of funny.

Is this a multipart punking with characters and plot arcs?

Is the Daily Mail just posting patently absurd articles for web-traffic?

I think so. Mostly.

Now if you don't know what I'm talking about, there's a new internet sensation, and her name is Samantha Brick. She wrote an article Monday in the Daily Mail proclaiming that people treat her differently because she's so beautiful-- men buy her champagne, and women snipe at her due to feelings of intense jealousy.

Because she's so beautiful.

Right? Okay, so... Ancient Troy just called, and they're eager to negotiate a peace. Know what I mean?

But she's got this article saying that it isn't easy being beautiful.

This article explains that writers like pitching goofball, Are-you-shitting-me? articles to the Daily Mail because they pay well.

So what we probably have here is that Samantha Brick decided, "Hey, wouldn't it be sort of insane if I started claiming I was super-hot? I bet the Daily Mail would pay me for such a thing."

But I don't know that.

Because now she's doubling down on her ethereal beauty (and by "ethereal," I mean "Chiefly residing on the Ethereal Plane").

Now she's saying, "See what I mean? I told you my beauty is provocative."


Roll your tongues back up, boys.
She's married.

But is she serious?

I don't know.

And it bothers me that I don't know.

Yesterday, I wrote an article in the Mail, posing the question: Why do women hate me for being beautiful? The response it provoked has been extraordinary in its volume and vitriol, and beyond anything I could have imagined when I first started work at my keyboard.

Of course, I knew when I came up with the idea that it would provoke debate. I'd even prefaced the idea by explaining to the editor that I was fully aware I was setting myself up for a fall. I knew this was sensitive territory at which women would take umbrage — but I thought it was a taboo that needed shattering.

...

While I've been shocked and hurt by the global condemnation, I have just this to say: my detractors have simply proved my point. Their level of anger only underlines that no one in this world is more reviled than a pretty woman.

Come on. As the British say -- Get off, you.

And yet women had reacted to my good looks in a very different way. Their hostility had stood in my way at work and even friends had dropped me, fearing their husbands fancied me.

Without doubt, this is a gender issue. For not only is it mostly women who are attacking me, it is also because I am female that I am being attacked for acknowledging my attractiveness.

Come on, admit you are punking me.

If Brad Pitt were to say: 'Yes, I'm a good-looking fella,' then the world would nod sagely in agreement. But if Angelina Jolie uttered something along those lines, she'd be subject to the same foaming-at-the-mouth onslaught hurled at me yesterday.

The same onslaught...? No, not quite the same, I don't think.

Take the latest message I've just received, which is pretty mild — but the intention is still to wound: 'I am sorry to be the one to burst your arrogant and conceited bubble but I don't find you attractive at all. You look a fool.'

Or how about this one, who used her office email and signs herself as an admin executive: 'You look a ridiculous fool, you make me ill'.

I am at a loss as to understand what goes through someone's mind before they press the 'send' button on a message like that.

I don't know. Spelling seemed okay in those.

I think we're wondering what sort of a lunatic, or demented comedic Kaufmanesque genius, concocted this absurd article in the first place.

...

I have lived and worked in Los Angeles and I doubt that such a reaction to my piece would have happened there. For in the U.S. you're expected to look good and you're rightly applauded for it.

Oh yeah. Maybe in England she's a fading 5, but in LA? 9.

...

Is it any wonder Victoria Beckham has decided to stay put in LA, rather than move back to Hertfordshire?

See? Is this real? I mean, come on.

This couldn't possibly be real.

Could it?

You know what I think?

I think the Daily Mail has figured out that no one believes kooky stories on April Fools Day.

So what's the point? Why bother? Who are ya foolin'?

Nobody, that's who.

But what about April 2nd-4th?

Ah. Now there's something.

Update: Samantha Brick has released skimpy bikini pictures to the Daily Mail to supposedly prove how hot she is.

Posted by: Ace at 12:38 PM



Comments

1 Last?

Posted by: The forgotten man at April 03, 2012 11:39 PM (W7JEz)

2 She has HUGE feet. They look like skis

Posted by: Ombudsman at April 03, 2012 11:42 PM (AxHOT)

3 All that being said, I'd still hit it.

Posted by: Ben at April 03, 2012 11:43 PM (UvdzB)

4 Bless her, poor thing.

Posted by: wte9 at April 03, 2012 11:43 PM (OYaaT)

5 Yo soy baffled.

Posted by: Otis Criblecoblis at April 03, 2012 11:44 PM (IlZPo)

6 Sexy and she knows it.

Posted by: Benson at April 03, 2012 11:44 PM (qzcNU)

7 She's a man baby!

Posted by: Austin Powers at April 03, 2012 11:44 PM (61yvg)

8 On my 5th jack and coke she looks beautifull enough for me. But I'll check back tomorrow.

Posted by: Jimmah at April 03, 2012 11:45 PM (UpwlP)

9 Beautiful? In those draperies?! I don't think so...

Posted by: Moochelle at April 03, 2012 11:45 PM (l/xhO)

10 You should put of the photo that shows a close view of her teeth. English teeth.

Posted by: Ben at April 03, 2012 11:46 PM (UvdzB)

11 Sorry for bumping you, Ace, but the Wisconsin primary #s are huge news and is good for Walker.

Posted by: CAC at April 03, 2012 11:46 PM (cFRvb)

12 Ben

I think we're holding her to the more rigorous standards of the normal, 1-10 scale. But is that fair? Perhaps we should use the more elegant 0-2 scale: 0=Never, 1=Lights off, 2=lights on.

She's a 2. Good for her.

Posted by: wte9 at April 03, 2012 11:46 PM (OYaaT)

13 Hahahahaha....
Can't stop laughing. She is NOT beautiful.
Women hate her because she thinks her SHIT doesn't stink. She's conceited for no reason...her husband isn't even hot.

Posted by: Random Hot Chick at April 03, 2012 11:47 PM (2TreH)

14 np cac.

Posted by: ace at April 03, 2012 11:47 PM (nj1bB)

15 Her feet look huge. And she has bad teeth too.

Posted by: Katechon at April 03, 2012 11:47 PM (qNhkX)

16 It's not that she's ugly. She's okay. But nothing your chin drops the floor over. And nothing that would cause people to hate her over her beauty. I'm betting everyone can think of someone sexier/prettier.

Posted by: Benson at April 03, 2012 11:48 PM (qzcNU)

17 Women don't hate you for being beautiful, they hate you because your a self deluding skank who believes she's hot because all the guys banging her say she is. Honey, guy's LIE. Especially if they think they're going to get laid if they do. Ask your husband. (although if he likes banging you, he'll probably lie too.)

What. A. Dope.

This woman looks in the mirror and sees an image comparable to Angelina Jolie? No. Sorry. BZZZZZZZZZZ. Wrong! Try again dumbass.

Posted by: Inspired by disgust at April 03, 2012 11:48 PM (CP+yl)

18 I feel like I've seen her before. On the Daily Show or the Office or something.

Posted by: Ben at April 03, 2012 11:49 PM (UvdzB)

19 she's released bikini pictures to prove how "beautiful" she is

http://oi44.tinypic.com/11ce3co.jpg

Posted by: ace at April 03, 2012 11:50 PM (nj1bB)

20 >>>I feel like I've seen her before. On the Daily Show or the Office or something.


No I know you mean, you mean Nancy Walls, who married Steve Carrell, who has the same basic look, *except attractive.*

Posted by: ace at April 03, 2012 11:50 PM (nj1bB)

21 Her husband looks like a Duke, or maybe a cab driver.

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 03, 2012 11:51 PM (Sh42X)

22 Excuse me ma'am, but Ed Bagely Jr. would like his face back.

Posted by: Lemmiwinks at April 03, 2012 11:52 PM (61yvg)

23
>>No I know you mean, you mean Nancy Walls, who married Steve Carrell, who has the same basic look, *except attractive.


yeah that's it. I'm looking at her Wikipedia page right now. They really could be the same person. Except Nancy Walls has a bigger mouth.

Posted by: Ben at April 03, 2012 11:54 PM (UvdzB)

24 She's got to be Aprilfoolin' us. In which case, well played.

Posted by: Boulder Toilet Hobo at April 03, 2012 11:54 PM (QTHTd)

25 LONDON BOYS - LONDON NIGHTS

Posted by: BeckoningChasm at April 03, 2012 11:57 PM (i0App)

26 Maybe she's unphotogenic but extremely attractive in person? And I don't think it matters that her husband isn't a hunk. The fact that she's never been asked to be a bridesmaid, though, seems clear evidence that's she's unlikable or that she purposely selects jealous cows for friends.

Posted by: @PsstErika at April 04, 2012 12:03 AM (ZN1tk)

27 definitely not an advert by British tourism council
ugh!
maybe she's easy and does stuff really hot chicks won't
that's why they hate her, she's a slutramp

Posted by: michael in greensboro at April 04, 2012 12:03 AM (nhlz8)

28 You're not accounting for the fact that she's British. This is quite good-looking for a British woman.

Posted by: Crispian at April 04, 2012 12:04 AM (P9LP6)

29 She's beautiful on the inside.

Posted by: rdbrewer at April 04, 2012 12:04 AM (Iyg03)

30 Maybe she's pretty on the inside.

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 04, 2012 12:04 AM (Sh42X)

31 Maybe.

Posted by: rdbrewer at April 04, 2012 12:04 AM (Iyg03)

32 Beat Spank by three seconds.

Posted by: rdbrewer at April 04, 2012 12:05 AM (Iyg03)

33 FU rd.

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 04, 2012 12:05 AM (Sh42X)

34 /shakes fist at update

Posted by: Waterhouse at April 04, 2012 12:07 AM (bpT90)

35 >>>You're not accounting for the fact that she's British. This is quite good-looking for a British woman.

Oh, British girls can be super-hot.

Posted by: ace at April 04, 2012 12:08 AM (nj1bB)

36 Maybe she's 100 years old.

Posted by: jovanna at April 04, 2012 12:09 AM (C+7E7)

37 36--

Ah. For a centarian, sure, she's hot.

Posted by: ace at April 04, 2012 12:09 AM (nj1bB)

38 I'd bang her.

Not because she is beautiful or anything like that. It would be because when it comes to banging, I have pretty low standards.

Posted by: MrCaniac at April 04, 2012 12:09 AM (1grxW)

39 I thought this was a joke because her name's "Brick" like in "She's a briiiick howwwwws." But what do I know?

Looks to me like those elbows are pretty pointy. And I think her mouth's too small for her face.

Posted by: Theresa at April 04, 2012 12:11 AM (6/tED)

40 I have no standards and I'm on the fence.

Posted by: Dr Spank at April 04, 2012 12:12 AM (Sh42X)

41 "Update: Samantha Brick has released skimpy bikini pictures to the Daily Mail to supposedly prove how hot she is."

Is she hiding behind the London Boys?

And I know it before I clicked it - but I had to click nonetheless...

Posted by: Schadenfreude at the pain of the Trolls at April 04, 2012 12:13 AM (BB0/w)

42 The last time I saw a mouth like that it had a hook in it.

Posted by: Rodney Dangerfield at April 04, 2012 12:13 AM (UR5vq)

43 Look, you're all missing the obvious. This is an English woman you're talking about. This is a person who's spent her entire life in Britain.

Now look at those teeth...

Perfect.

A+, easily a 10. Yeah, all the rest might be what you'd find among any middle-aged office worker, but those are some damn nice teeth, especially for a past-middle aged Brit woman. When she says she's hot, when she says other people say she's hot, that's what she means.

Posted by: AD (Yes, it's an old joke but it's the only thing that makes sense) at April 04, 2012 12:14 AM (aihGO)

44 Hey, I'm smokin'-hot myself.

Posted by: A Humble Shovel at April 04, 2012 12:14 AM (nj1bB)

45 <i>All that being said, I'd still hit it.


Posted by: Ben at April 03, 2012 11:43 PM (UvdzB)</i>Not too hard... you might break something important. :-)

Posted by: elaine at April 04, 2012 12:15 AM (F63y/)

46 Bunk!

Posted by: Helen Thomas at April 04, 2012 12:16 AM (UR5vq)

47 I still fapped.

Posted by: Schadenfreude at the pain of the Trolls at April 04, 2012 12:16 AM (BB0/w)

48 If this is an honest troll, it takes balls for her to put her giant neanderthal forehead out there. Brava, madame.

Posted by: Brian Heavey at April 04, 2012 12:16 AM (6Xmh/)

49 She must've been something before electricity.

Posted by: Rodney Dangerfield at April 04, 2012 12:16 AM (Sh42X)

50 47 I still fapped.
Posted by: Schadenfreude at the pain of the Trolls at April 04, 2012 12:16 AM (BB0/w)

NOT to the London Boys, though...

Posted by: Schadenfreude at the pain of the Trolls at April 04, 2012 12:17 AM (BB0/w)

51
"This couldn't possibly be real. Could it?"
She's OK looking, certainly not beautiful.
So, is it a joke? Is she so delusional and got a major newspaper to play along with that delusion?
Come on, in 15 minutes anyone could find a more "beautiful" woman, anywhere in the world!
Things like this frighten me.
Because this is how Barack Obama got to be president.

Posted by: jocon307 at April 04, 2012 12:17 AM (bbVJG)

52 Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at April 04, 2012 12:18 AM (7W3wI)

53 Ze Beer Goggles, zey do nothing!

Posted by: garrett at April 04, 2012 12:18 AM (+CrrB)

54 If you hit that you'd break her hip.

Posted by: garrett at April 04, 2012 12:19 AM (+CrrB)

55 Don't hate me because I'm competent.

Posted by: Barack Obama at April 04, 2012 12:21 AM (nj1bB)

56 It's a joke.Got to be.

Posted by: steevy at April 04, 2012 12:21 AM (7W3wI)

57 Where does Debbie Wassername rank in Britain?

Posted by: passably affable at April 04, 2012 12:21 AM (t+Vmm)

58 Compared to Camilla she's smokin' hot.

Posted by: Payaso at April 04, 2012 12:21 AM (GrYbB)

59 Don't hate me because I'm cool-headed.

Posted by: Meat Loaf at April 04, 2012 12:22 AM (Iyg03)

60 56 It's a joke.Got to be.

Nope. Some people are that delusional.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at April 04, 2012 12:23 AM (UR5vq)

61 I feel bad snarking on her because she's not that bad.I wonder if it could be a send up of the attention Michelle Obama gets?

Posted by: steevy at April 04, 2012 12:23 AM (7W3wI)

62 >>>Where does Debbie Wassername rank in Britain?

Still only meh, alas.

Posted by: ace at April 04, 2012 12:23 AM (nj1bB)

63 Jeez Louise, even Moochelle doesn't call herself beautiful, she lets syncophants in the MBM do that

Posted by: kbdabear at April 04, 2012 12:23 AM (Y+DPZ)

64 Meh--your average Pi Phi pledge at Moo State Universitiy looks better than that. Now maybe when this lady was sweet little 16 you may have been hot, but right now there are a lot of miles on that transmission. Don't know that I'd trust my"stick" shift with it.

Posted by: Comanche Voter at April 04, 2012 12:25 AM (6USwK)

65 She is honeypot spy, sent by the Polish Mafia.

Posted by: Schadenfreude at the pain of the Trolls at April 04, 2012 12:26 AM (BB0/w)

66 Ace,

You spent this much time actually writing two posts about this? She won and so did "The"Daily Mail".

Posted by: FenelonSpoke at April 04, 2012 12:27 AM (YsDUX)

67 Haven't laughed so hard since C*ntessa Brewer said that Imus hated her because he didn't know how to relate to a beautiful woman.

Imus replied: “With that fat ass she’s got, she wouldn’t be one of ‘em,” Imus said on the air Friday. “That skank has to spend three hours with makeup in the morning … Who’s she kidding? . . . Plus, she’s dumber than dirt … Oh, my God, what a pig. But I was willing to cut her some slack and not say anything, you know, until – in fact, I didn’t say anything . . . That’s why they have those big double-doors there at MSNBC, you know, so they can get her fat ass in makeup.”


Posted by: kbdabear at April 04, 2012 12:28 AM (Y+DPZ)

68 Armed with my looks and a 50 IQ, I should be way up the corporate laddre by now, but the ladies won't allow it.

Posted by: Samantha Brick at April 04, 2012 12:29 AM (Sh42X)

69 Well, she's much better looking than the horse-toothed prog that's pushing for people to be "treated" if they don't believe in glow-bull warming.

http://tinyurl.com/cdff8ml

That chick looks like she could eat corn through a chain link fence.

Posted by: Everything is relative at April 04, 2012 12:33 AM (sJKFk)

70 She... weellllll, okay, four shots. And a six of Mickey's Big Mouth. And a boilermaker.

And some weed.

And maybe yeah, I'd .. no.

Naw, never mind.

Posted by: Inspector Asshole at April 04, 2012 12:33 AM (iVaoN)

71 I'd reluctantly let her drink my juice. Those teeth can do damage though.

Posted by: Katechon at April 04, 2012 12:34 AM (qNhkX)

72 Hell, I'd doubletramp Michelle Obama five times before lunchtime before I'd venture four fingers for Mrs. Think-Of-Britain's-Lumpy-Wimmens.

Posted by: Inspector Asshole at April 04, 2012 12:36 AM (iVaoN)

73 She's just jealous of me. Slut!

Posted by: Helen Thomas at April 04, 2012 12:39 AM (UR5vq)

74 I bet she has a great personality.

Posted by: fb at April 04, 2012 12:41 AM (wQ1iq)

75 I'd hit it.

Posted by: George Zimmerman's Kel-Tec at April 04, 2012 12:43 AM (BPb5K)

76 I didn't know Olby had a twin sister.

Posted by: Payaso at April 04, 2012 12:45 AM (GrYbB)

77 Myself, I would require a close inspection to determine her beautitude.

Posted by: badanov at April 04, 2012 12:53 AM (NpK80)

78 75 I'd hit it.
Posted by: George Zimmerman's Kel-Tec at April 04, 2012 12:43 AM (BPb5K)
---
I'm withthe George Zimmerman's of the world, in that I would hittit.

Posted by: Jimmah at April 04, 2012 12:54 AM (UpwlP)

79 I'd hit it.

Posted by: Ike Turner at April 04, 2012 12:58 AM (eTlP8)

80 I hit it.

A dozen or so times.

Posted by: Ugly Stick at April 04, 2012 01:00 AM (iVaoN)

81 What's with the snowshoes?

Posted by: Cicero at April 04, 2012 01:11 AM (eTlP8)

82 listen up fags

alot of times the ones with fat legs

and puffy face

will let you do stuff on them

that youre wife doesnt let you

get a open mind idiots

Posted by: Jose Canseco's Gristle Encased Head at April 04, 2012 01:16 AM (gkSHY)

83 I don't even think Angelina Jolie is that hot and this soccer mom doesn't holda candle to her.

Posted by: Burn the Witch at April 04, 2012 01:25 AM (isP0N)

84 Some flowers just don't understand bees stop at every one.

Posted by: DANEgerus at April 04, 2012 01:36 AM (NhcG5)

85 Ann Althouse must be 20 years older but is twice as doable as this bloodless, zero-charisma scragbird.


Posted by: Little Miss Spellcheck at April 04, 2012 01:37 AM (a5ljo)

86 Why do women hate you for being beautiful?

Yeah, why? 'Cause you're not.

Posted by: Krebs v Carnot: Epic Battle of the Cycling Stars at April 04, 2012 01:39 AM (lce0m)

87 Put another Brick in the wall--over her face!

Posted by: Pink Floyd at April 04, 2012 01:40 AM (vJ9tV)

88 Alternate theory: People just don't like her because she's obviously a deluded bitch.

Posted by: Sgt. York at April 04, 2012 01:49 AM (5Y+DR)

89
I did some deeper digging into this. It appears she has a sister who is also hatefully beautiful.


http://tinyurl.com/cbghvc7

Posted by: landofskybluewater at April 04, 2012 02:02 AM (JoIcn)

90 landofskybluewater at April 04, 2012 02:02 AM (JoIcn)

You owe me a key board. I just threw up on mine.

Posted by: Have Blue at April 04, 2012 02:10 AM (0dPUM)

91 I think somebody is waaaay too interested in this story and just might have a chubbeh for the lass.

Posted by: MikeD at April 04, 2012 02:17 AM (p8QOg)

92 I keep waiting for the day when Elena Kagan's life story will be put onto the big screen. I predict a gritty and dead-on accurate portrayal of Kagan will lead to an Oscar win..........for Patton Oswald.

Posted by: landofskybluewater at April 04, 2012 02:18 AM (JoIcn)

93 get a open mind idiots

Posted by: Jose Canseco's Gristle Encased Head

That's what prostitutes are for.

Posted by: John the Libertarian at April 04, 2012 02:27 AM (bJQRu)

94 I've seen a hotter looking ass hauling supplies up to Everest Base Camp.

Silly bitch.

Posted by: Alec Baldwin at April 04, 2012 02:35 AM (U/ftZ)

95
@94: "I've seen a hotter looking ass hauling supplies up to Everest Base Camp."

To be fair, most of the expeditions hire very sexy yaks.

Posted by: Ba Zing Sherpa at April 04, 2012 02:55 AM (BPb5K)

96 Cor, who's the lovely bird, then?

Posted by: BoutrosBoutros at April 04, 2012 03:11 AM (lBh8j)

97 People hate me cause I know the Constitution.

Even if it is old and stuff.

And it's cool with Obamacare. Trust me on that.

Posted by: Ezra Klein at April 04, 2012 03:32 AM (+XVQe)

98 People hate me because I'm a dick.

Posted by: Keith Olbermann at April 04, 2012 03:32 AM (+XVQe)

99 People hate me because I'm an insufferable ass.

Posted by: Bawney Fwank at April 04, 2012 03:33 AM (+XVQe)

100 People hate me? Are you kidding?!?

Posted by: Granny Rictis McBotox at April 04, 2012 03:34 AM (+XVQe)

101 People hate me because my sole interest is in justice.

And skillets.

Posted by: Al Sharpton at April 04, 2012 03:36 AM (+XVQe)

102 People hate me because I can instinctively articulate conservative arguments and the case for freedom and have absolutely no problem relating to ordinary folks.

Posted by: Mittens at April 04, 2012 03:38 AM (+XVQe)

103 Doesn't fit my concept of beauftiful. Ordinary maybe.

Posted by: LarryG at April 04, 2012 03:40 AM (q9LWi)

104
Oi! Miss me yet?
- From Hell

Posted by: Jack the Ripper at April 04, 2012 03:47 AM (BPb5K)

105 I'd hit that.

Posted by: Cattle Prod at April 04, 2012 05:32 AM (tnqbf)

106 Sounds like a tome SCOAMF would write.

Posted by: ThrowingUpinPhoenix at April 04, 2012 06:30 AM (yWDpP)

107
You should check out the lowest rated comments on the original story. Either there's a lot of readers in on the joke, or there's a lot of deluded people with access to the internet.

What am I saying? Of course there's a lot of deluded people on the internet, I'm just surprised they took time of from pimping Ron Paul to comment on the article.

Posted by: digitalbrownshirt at April 04, 2012 06:35 AM (eHwT1)

108 Salma Hayak will be cast as Sotomeyor.


Posted by: kdny at April 04, 2012 06:52 AM (63qg4)

109 Meh.... Seen better. Can you say Kylie Minogue? At least I know Kylie can dance and sing...

Plus, I've seen better legs on a BBQ chicken... and purple isn't her colour. Maybe paper-bag brown...

Posted by: fred zeppelin at April 04, 2012 07:11 AM (zL/eJ)

110 Leave Samantha ALONE!!!!111


Posted by: Roland THTG at April 04, 2012 07:33 AM (vWZa0)

111 Just close your eyes and think of England

Posted by: Queequeg the Harpooner at April 04, 2012 07:36 AM (Uh+y6)

112 This reminds me of Passe Pasty Massy.

Posted by: Kevin at April 04, 2012 08:07 AM (3o64G)

113 Here's why I hate her: She's so beautiful that after I saw her picture I had to make a doctor's appointment about the erection that I've had for more than four hours. She's dangerously hot. G-r-r-r-row-el.

But then again I think Elana Kagan is kinda cute too, so my ability to determine the pulchritude of the opposite sex may be just a little weak.

Posted by: Minuteman at April 04, 2012 08:30 AM (qs9G3)

114 I'd put a flag over her head and hit it for Old Glory.

Posted by: packsoldier at April 04, 2012 08:33 AM (9tLNI)

115 I've just finished kicking out that last stained glass window here at the Vatican and stomped my pointy hat, because I'm quitting this gig so I can chase some of that sweet Samantha Brick cooter.

Posted by: Bennie, Bishop of Rome, Vicar of Jesus Christ, Successor of the Prince of the Apostles, Supreme Pont at April 04, 2012 08:42 AM (qs9G3)

116 Samantha Baby-

Give me a call-

Bennie

Bishop of Rome, Vicar of Jesus Christ, Successor of the Prince of the Apostles, Supreme Pontiff of the Universal Church, Primate of Italy,Archbishop and Metropolitan of the Roman Province, Sovereign of the State of Vatican City, Servant of the Servants of God

Posted by: Bennie, Bishop of Rome, Vicar of Jesus Christ, Successor of the Prince of the Apostles, Supreme Pont at April 04, 2012 08:45 AM (qs9G3)

117 She's British. Finding beauty there is like finding the least repugnant troll under the bridge.

Posted by: VideoSavant at April 04, 2012 08:50 AM (Z6KEn)

118 "Ace, I can't quit you!"

Posted by: benny jets at April 04, 2012 08:51 AM (1p8BU)

119 Yada, yada, yada...

Posted by: Will Folks at April 04, 2012 09:08 AM (vYB+W)

120 Call me. We'll do lunch.

Posted by: Rula Lenska at April 04, 2012 09:08 AM (RJOgX)

121 So how does she compare to that Mary Paisley Poppy chick who only dated A rated dudes or some such.

Posted by: BigBluBug at April 04, 2012 09:15 AM (5kbA8)

122 She's very attractive; a real MILF.

That said, her attitude (about herself, the world, and her place in it) could use a LOT of readjusting. That's the real turn-off.

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 04, 2012 09:16 AM (exvgC)

123 My brother's an idiot. She ain't hot.

Now La Pelosi, there's your real MILF. GRRRR.

Posted by: Checkus Aurelius (Wolfus's brother) at April 04, 2012 09:17 AM (exvgC)

124 Checkus is off his meds.

I just realized who Samantha reminds me of: Hayley Mills, when she was older on "Saved by the Bell."

Posted by: Wolfus Aurelius at April 04, 2012 09:19 AM (exvgC)

125 I tried to leave the following comment, but the Daily Mail wanted me to register:

"Awww. Poor widdle female complains about constantly getting freebies and perks because she's good-looking.

"Try being an average-looking man (that is, NOT Brad Pitt material) for a week. You'll be ignored and marginalized every day. You'll run back to your old life and hug your makeup kit, you'll be so glad to have your special 'girl' treatment again."

Posted by: Benzadmiral at April 04, 2012 09:25 AM (exvgC)

126
Jackie Mackie Paisley Passey just called to say that Samantha Brick is a very high-quality woman.

Posted by: OnePercenter at April 04, 2012 09:30 AM (otN9L)

127 She looks like my daughter. and my wife at that age, and to tell the truth a whole lot like my mom. I'm glad I like my dad, otherwise that would say something really oedipal about me.

Posted by: Tom Servo at April 04, 2012 09:40 AM (rJmI4)

128 Is this an April Fools joke, because she looks pretty fucking ugly to me.

Posted by: Jack Burton at April 04, 2012 09:43 AM (3H74j)

129 #126 wins the Internets.

Posted by: Ken at April 04, 2012 09:49 AM (7yb9x)

130 Look, bitch, you may think you're beautiful, but I can buy and sell your two-bit ass like a yard sale tea set.

Posted by: Susan Boyle at April 04, 2012 09:58 AM (iAUf+)

131 I'd do her with a six pack in me.

Posted by: whenuboilitdown at April 04, 2012 10:15 AM (oKzk6)

132
Ok, I'm desparate enough to say that I'd take one for the team...

Otherwise, meh...she's ok but hardly hot enough to make my top 100 list of "If they asked me I'd say yes" list.

Posted by: Gmac at April 04, 2012 10:23 AM (g2Zn1)

133 Maybe she's one of those people that doesn't photograph well. ....Becausemmmeh....that 'beauty' she's crowing about is just not coming across in the photos of her.

Posted by: wheatie at April 04, 2012 10:24 AM (+5U+B)

134 I'm much younger than her and besides she looks like a mormon who wants to take over the world.

Posted by: ozfic-curious at April 04, 2012 10:31 AM (jm/9g)

135 She's so beautiful, I'm so jealous and obsessed with her that I printed out 3,124 photographs of her and decoupaged my spare bedroom with the pictures and began a killing spree of blonde Samantha look-a-likes. I hope the cops don't nab me before I gather enough "trophies" for the reconstructive surgery. The legs are a problem, I might have to have them grafted from a small horse.

Posted by: jeannebodine at April 04, 2012 10:37 AM (byR8d)

136 She is trying to be funny, right? Man, I hope so. If not she is demented.

Posted by: USMC Steve at April 04, 2012 10:55 AM (mW1sw)

137 I know where she's coming from.

Posted by: Jackie Mackie Hackey Sackey at April 04, 2012 10:56 AM (uaEZS)

138 Let's give her a break. She's English Cute. Not cute-cute, but cute for someone in England. It's one step below Hollywood Ugly. As in, she's not quite hot enough to be the star's ugly friend in a sitcom.

Posted by: Phelps at April 04, 2012 10:56 AM (HDIbi)

139 I agree with Ms. Brick about what would happen if Angelina Jolie announced she were a good-looking fella. It would be a stunning betrayal of what teenage boys hold most dear.

Posted by: blah at April 04, 2012 10:57 AM (fUadS)

140 I have to admit, though: if she worked in my office, I'd probably salivate over her. She's very much a normal girl catch.

Posted by: Kensington at April 04, 2012 10:58 AM (uaEZS)

141 She's just attractive enough for a donkey punch.

Posted by: HeftyJo at April 04, 2012 11:03 AM (1oE9r)

142 She stole this whole "I'm beautiful" premise from Obama's '08 presidential campaign.

Think about it.

Posted by: Syd B. at April 04, 2012 11:03 AM (phzv/)

143 A lot of people do look better in person than in photographs. She has clear skin, delicate coloring and in her salad days might have had an arresting gaze or nice smile.

But I think the paper is having us on alright.


Posted by: Sarahw at April 04, 2012 11:07 AM (LYwCh)

144 "if you want to know why the Obama administration failed so spectacularly to defend Obamacare in the Supreme Court last week, look no further than a 2008 statement President Obama gave to author Richard Wolfe: "You know, I believe my own bulls--t."
I believe these bloody Limeys are having a bit of fun at the expense of our boy genius, Emporer Obama.

Here is what Obama told aide Patrick Gaspard in 2008: "I think that I'm a better speechwriter than my speechwriters. I know more about policies on any particular issue than my policy directors. And I'll tell you right now that I'm gonna think I'm a better political director than my political director."
But don't worry. Obama is the most talented politician of our time. Just ask him. In 2004, after his Democratic National Convention speech, Obama told David Mendell, "I'm LeBron, baby."



Don't hate me because I'm beautiful, indeed!

Posted by: Effin ess o bee at April 04, 2012 11:19 AM (7U1Hj)

145
It's all in the eye of the beholder, methinks. I think she's drop dead gorgeous. But then again, she's right up my alley.But then again,I'd like to be right up hers as well

Posted by: Callmelennie at April 04, 2012 11:21 AM (GOsSG)

146 look at that smile, look at those teeth. That absolutely puts her in the top 1% in England!

Posted by: Tom Servo at April 04, 2012 11:26 AM (lTcoT)

147 Hey morons, mebbe she's right. Look at all the hatred directed at Moochelle, the mostest glamorous, beautifulist and elegantist FLOTUS in history. H8ers. Especially you moronettes.

Posted by: eureka! at April 04, 2012 11:33 AM (LQIyD)

148 Can she suck a golf ball through a hose? That's true beauty.

Posted by: Bill Clinton at April 04, 2012 11:33 AM (+dFO9)

149 I think it's real.

But then I'm taken in by these internet punkings all-the-fucking time.

Posted by: Pastafarian at April 04, 2012 11:47 AM (p7jpu)

150 I'd hit it.
But then again I'd fuck a pile of rocks if there was a snake in it.

Posted by: Gaseous Clay at April 04, 2012 11:48 AM (cQhQZ)

151 She mistakes being easy for beauty.

Posted by: theCork at April 04, 2012 11:49 AM (AsGWW)

152 Pffffft. She didn't even make the Maxim 100 list.

Posted by: Michelle Antoinette Obama at April 04, 2012 11:56 AM (pmAGk)

153 I'm so filled with apathy when looking at her photo, it must be blinding me to my true feelings of malicious jealousy.

I would never notice her on the street, but that is probably because my brain is blocking the image in order to protect me from a complete meltdown over my total lack of any similar quality to her.

She is a vision: of a well-maintained lawn, a brand-new mall, or a forlorn sculpture at a road-side restroom boasting wifi.

Posted by: Feynmangroupie at April 04, 2012 12:01 PM (oI744)

154 It had better be Peter Pan peanut butter before I would stick my nose in that scamper.

Posted by: Toby the Beagle at April 04, 2012 12:39 PM (1grxW)

155 All chicks are crazy. Apparently she never learned how to properly channel hers.

Posted by: laceyunderalls at April 04, 2012 12:40 PM (pLTLS)

156 B - ( there's lots of Them around )

Posted by: SantaRosaStan, always marvelous at April 04, 2012 12:40 PM (Dll6b)

157 It can't be THAT slow of a news day.

Posted by: Gerry at April 04, 2012 12:41 PM (40BhQ)

158 DWS is hawter than that

Posted by: JWF at April 04, 2012 12:43 PM (1l37M)

159 Meh.. she doesn't hold a candle to the stunning beauty of the AOS 'ettes.

Posted by: Jumbo Jogging Shrimp at April 04, 2012 12:43 PM (DGIjM)

160 gee, my dislike is based on her apparent stupidity, not her looks

Posted by: the Butcher at April 04, 2012 12:43 PM (8g9qq)

161 lol delusional

Posted by: phoenixgirl at April 04, 2012 12:43 PM (h8UT+)

162 Bring on the Gorn.

Posted by: toby928© at April 04, 2012 12:44 PM (GTbGH)

163
I know exactly how she feels.

A lot of people on this blog hate me because I'm smart and funny and I can see the future...and the future is bleak.

Posted by: Soothsayer at April 04, 2012 12:44 PM (jUytm)

164 In Los Angeles (where I live), this woman would be just an average looking soccer mom.
In the right light, after a few stiff drinks, she could rate a 6 at most.

Posted by: Mikey at April 04, 2012 12:44 PM (db4pz)

165 Don't hate me because me beautiful.

Posted by: Alan Grayson at April 04, 2012 12:44 PM (Qxdfp)

Posted by: yo at April 04, 2012 12:45 PM (Qxdfp)

167
Gotta say, I love a plain-jane in an ascot.

Posted by: Soothsayer at April 04, 2012 12:45 PM (jUytm)

168 My speak and spell works better than this blog.

Posted by: Clutch Cargo at April 04, 2012 12:45 PM (Qxdfp)

169 people who point out their beauty are usually ugly on the inside too

Posted by: phoenixgirl at April 04, 2012 12:46 PM (h8UT+)

170 Velma is hotter.
Scooby for that matter.

Posted by: Clutch Cargo at April 04, 2012 12:46 PM (Qxdfp)

171 Damn ace, punked us again with those euro pop fan boyz.

Posted by: Vic at April 04, 2012 12:46 PM (YdQQY)

172 I'm glad this is a slow news day, given the OMFGTORNADO shit yesterday. How are the metroplex morons doing today?

Posted by: Boulder Toilet Hobo at April 04, 2012 12:46 PM (QTHTd)

173 People hate me because I'm so conservative.

Posted by: Andrew Sullivan at April 04, 2012 12:46 PM (H84UO)

174
Nice rickroll, Ace

Posted by: Soothsayer at April 04, 2012 12:47 PM (jUytm)

175 LOL @ 165!!

Posted by: jewells45 at April 04, 2012 12:47 PM (l/N7H)

176 Velma is hotter.

Sacred honor ...

Posted by: shaggy at April 04, 2012 12:47 PM (GTbGH)

177 So let's see if I can harness the logic...

I'm the most intelligent marmot in the planet and you're haters because you just can't understand my intellectuality.

If you complain or hate on me, it is tacit proof of my correctness.

QED Bitches.

Posted by: Darth Chipmunk at April 04, 2012 12:47 PM (pVvkk)

178 Dear Mrs. Brick,

People don't hate you because you're beautiful. They hate you because you're a self-absorbed bitch.

Sincerely,

MWR

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit and ABO Supporter at April 04, 2012 12:48 PM (4df7R)

179 What the hell ace? She is talking about the inside...beautiful on the inside.

Posted by: robtron at April 04, 2012 12:49 PM (gsy5B)

180 Hate not I for beautiful I am.

Posted by: Yoda at April 04, 2012 12:49 PM (Qxdfp)

181 Even female warthogs are attractive to male warthogs as evidenced by bebe warthogs.

Posted by: Cicero Kid at April 04, 2012 12:49 PM (zsyDl)

182
Well, I guess that shit just got real.

Posted by: km at April 04, 2012 12:50 PM (iFQkz)

183 Deluded is not just a river in Egypt.

Posted by: t-bird at April 04, 2012 12:50 PM (l/xhO)

184
They make a line of clothing for people like her.

They make shorts and sweat pants for people with a combination of low self-esteem, narcissism, and attention-seeking disorder.

"PINK" and "SEXY" and "LOVE ME" are the words you'll see on the backside of this line of clothing.

Posted by: Soothsayer at April 04, 2012 12:50 PM (jUytm)

185 Seriously, though, she's pretty in a "girl next door," Bridget Jones kind of way. But beautiful? Um...

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit and ABO Supporter at April 04, 2012 12:51 PM (4df7R)

186 Exit question:

What does her tramp stamp say?

Posted by: Darth Chipmunk at April 04, 2012 12:51 PM (0tRzD)

187 If it's a slow news day, you should bump
The Perfect Girl For Allah (And Everyone Else, But Only If You're A Quality Man)

Posted by: toby928© at April 04, 2012 12:51 PM (GTbGH)

188 This is a goof, guys. It's Boxxy all over again

Posted by: Boulder Toilet Hobo at April 04, 2012 12:51 PM (QTHTd)

189 Boy, poor Ace really has the hots for this woman.

Posted by: mike at April 04, 2012 12:52 PM (fsTVa)

190 Assuming she actually believes this, she must be very flirty and aggressive with older, taken men because *that* I've witnessed. A woman who is passably attractive--especially in service-type jobs--can incur the enmity of wives or girlfriends by just overdoing it with their attached males.

With that kind of approach, she doesn't have to be drop-dead gorgeous. In fact other women are less threatened by a beautiful woman who isn't aggressive because they assume she's out of their mates' league.

Posted by: Nicholas Kronos at April 04, 2012 12:52 PM (XXy2R)

191 PINK" and "SEXY" and "LOVE ME" are the words you'll see on the backside of this line of clothing.

Posted by: Soothsayer at April 04, 2012 12:50 PM (jUytm)


JUICY.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit and ABO Supporter at April 04, 2012 12:52 PM (4df7R)

192 183
Speaking of which, the new 2013 Chevy Hybrid is going to be called the Delude™

Posted by: Yoda at April 04, 2012 12:52 PM (Qxdfp)

193 Ugh

Posted by: Clutch Cargo at April 04, 2012 12:53 PM (Qxdfp)

194 She is talking about the inside...beautiful on the inside.

Beautiful tonsils? Hmm, had not considered that angle. Only one way to find out...

Posted by: t-bird at April 04, 2012 12:53 PM (l/xhO)

195 80I hit it.

A dozen or so times.Posted by: Ugly Stick at April 04, 2012 01:00 AM (iVaoN)

Too late.

Posted by: Mud Fence at April 04, 2012 12:53 PM (zsyDl)

196 Beautiful tonsils? Hmm, had not considered that angle. Only one way to find out...

Posted by: t-bird at April 04, 2012 12:53 PM (l/xhO)


I pray you mean "by removing them."

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit and ABO Supporter at April 04, 2012 12:53 PM (4df7R)

197 While it is nice to have a positive self___, at some point it may cross over into delusion.

Posted by: Vashta Nerada at April 04, 2012 12:54 PM (3zV6k)

198 "PINK" and "SEXY" and "LOVE ME" are the words you'll see on the backside of this line of clothing.

Stay out of my underwear drawer.

Posted by: Shia LaBoeuf at April 04, 2012 12:54 PM (QTHTd)

199 I could show you pics of Mrs Stan in her Twenties; melt your eyeballs, they would

( I could, but I won't )

Posted by: SantaRosaStan, always marvelous at April 04, 2012 12:54 PM (Dll6b)

200
185"Seriously, though, she's pretty in a "girl next door," Bridget Jones kind of way. But beautiful? Um..."
I'm thinkin' "Fatal Attraction".

Posted by: Cicero Kid at April 04, 2012 12:54 PM (zsyDl)

201 186 Exit question: What does her tramp stamp say?

"those aren't hemorrhoids"?

Posted by: Clutch Cargo at April 04, 2012 12:55 PM (Qxdfp)

202 Meh. She's a 6 at best.
And subtract points for her winning personality.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at April 04, 2012 12:55 PM (IfglT)

203 Sod off you old fucking hag!

Posted by: Killjoy at April 04, 2012 12:57 PM (U/ftZ)

204 The only thing that I'd say in her defense is that there is an army of loser men out there for whom a chick merely being blonde turns them into drooling idiots. She may simply mistake being a beneficiary of this perverse phenomena for actually being hot.

Posted by: Deuce at April 04, 2012 12:57 PM (E55AK)

205 She's not as beautiful as our President, and the gals LOVE him!

Posted by: Cricket at April 04, 2012 01:02 PM (DrC22)

206 I use the Kirk Standard.
Would Capt. Kirk do her?
He bedded a lot of women, but remember, they were all pretty hot.

I do not think Capt. Kirk would do this woman.
He'd probably pass her off to a redshirt. Or Sulu.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at April 04, 2012 01:03 PM (IfglT)

207 This has got to be a joke along the same lines as the Black People really like us white couple.

Posted by: McLovin at April 04, 2012 01:03 PM (j0IcY)

208 I hate you, Ace. You made me click on that last link. You're the same as Hitler and Stalin and Mao combined.

Posted by: Andy at April 04, 2012 01:05 PM (Og7A+)

209 Maybe just like the generation of kids who all got a trophy for going 0-0-12 in soccer, this girl has always been around people too nice to tell her she is average or even slightly under average? Or maybe she lives in a town where all of the men have really low standards and like women with basketball player sizeed feet?

Posted by: Drew in MO at April 04, 2012 01:06 PM (KeFbr)

210 He'd probably pass her off to a redshirt. Or Sulu.

Oh my.

Posted by: Hikaru Sulu at April 04, 2012 01:07 PM (GTbGH)

211
Looks like she's on an ugly kick.

Posted by: Mr. Paul Anka at April 04, 2012 01:09 PM (Ks4nX)

212 the best thing I read about this was, "Samantha Brick is what you see when you masturbate through a brain hemorrhage."

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at April 04, 2012 01:09 PM (j9St3)

213 You know what they say about women with big feet....

Posted by: Javems at April 04, 2012 01:23 PM (nTgAI)

214 I guess anyone with semi straight teeth in England is considered a beauty.

Looks to me to be a fat big hipped mid aged twat, that needs a shave, see first picture

Posted by: Billy Bob, pseudo-intellectual at April 04, 2012 01:25 PM (hXJOG)

215 This woman looks in the mirror and sees an image comparable to Angelina Jolie?

Another one who I don't see the hot in. She's dark and her lips are scary huge.

Posted by: dagny at April 04, 2012 01:26 PM (CMM9V)

216 "I posted this late last night. Seems kind of funny."
*
Yeah kind of. I was crying from laughter reading the comments on this thread.

Posted by: kallisto at April 04, 2012 01:26 PM (jm/9g)

217 If I had a daughter she would look like this.

Posted by: Barry's white half at April 04, 2012 01:27 PM (hXJOG)

218 For the life of me, I cannot bring myself to click the swimsuit pics. I have a feeling it would be ED on film. The teeth alone... DEAR GOD, THE TEETH!

Posted by: thirtyandseven at April 04, 2012 01:34 PM (1YJQG)

219 186
Exit question:

What does her tramp stamp say?


Posted by: Darth Chipmunk at April 04, 2012 12:51 PM (0tRzD)

"Twice in the Pink, Once in the Stink"?

Posted by: MrCaniac at April 04, 2012 01:43 PM (1grxW)

220 This is England after all. After Kelly Brook and maybe half a dozen Page 3 girls, she's probably right up there.

Posted by: somebody else, not me at April 04, 2012 01:47 PM (nZvGM)

221 We'd hit it!

Posted by: Hillary and Bill in unison at April 04, 2012 01:51 PM (WGfPe)

222 I wouldn't mind getting a smackeral of honey from her honeypot.

Posted by: Winnie the Pooh at April 04, 2012 01:55 PM (1grxW)

223 I remember working with this big 'ol girl of Bavarian descent. Six feet tall, carrying about 60 extra pounds, tiny pig eyes, big nose, lank hair, no lips, and piano legs she flaunted every day in her micro mini skirts. She was convinced she was an extraordinary beauty. I figured it was strange, but didn't hold her self-delusion against her: she probably would have been a truly unhappy person if she faced reality.

Posted by: kathysaysso at April 04, 2012 02:02 PM (ZtwUX)

224 What a relief.
No one will hate me because I am beautiful.

Posted by: 2SoonOld2LateSmart at April 04, 2012 02:03 PM (YFAMg)

225 I'd hit that

Posted by: Janet Napolitano at April 04, 2012 02:25 PM (wHj25)

226 I saw another picture where she's standing in that purple getup with her husband. She's got some serious saddlebags goin' on. And the husband is dressed in old Army fatigues and is holding a rifle. He looks like Khalid Sheik Mohammed after a bath and a trim.

Oh, of course I'd still hit it.

Posted by: Enrico Pallazzo at April 04, 2012 02:31 PM (dSUs8)

227 Meh, she looks pretty hot for a 41 year old.

Posted by: Johnny at April 04, 2012 02:33 PM (r5w5T)

228 Maybe she knows things from working in brothels in Asia? That could explain it.

Posted by: Evi L. Bloggerlady at April 04, 2012 02:54 PM (IgakF)

229 People hate me because they're jealous of my intellect.

Posted by: Joe Biden at April 04, 2012 03:09 PM (+XVQe)

230 Speaking of the DM, that so-called "right-wing" publication.....yesterday they had the story out of the guy in Hattiesburg, MS who went into a Mexican restaurant and shot 5 people. Normally, a story like that would attract a 100+ comments of the usual "crazy Yanks", "ban guns now!", etc sort and be left up for at least a full day, if not longer. It had been there no more than an hour and had 3 comments posted when I put one in mentioning that the shooter, one Scott Tyner, was a hardcore "progressive" Democrat. When I came back an hour later to see if the comment was there, the story was gone.I'm guessing it was up perhaps 2 hours at most before being taken down. I haven't heard one peep about it in the MSM in the US either.

Posted by: Landru at April 04, 2012 03:49 PM (k40a0)

231 When people get nose jobs, don't they usually get them to make their noses seem smaller?

Posted by: Ed Snyder at April 04, 2012 03:57 PM (s4ynO)

232 She's hot like Stiffler's mom.

Posted by: Max Entropy at April 04, 2012 04:35 PM (et8iD)

233 This woman, if it is a woman, does not even rate a 3.5 of 10. Everything is out of proportion, thick lets, eyes that are terrifying, the list could go on forever, but I just can't stand to look any more.

Posted by: gDavid at April 04, 2012 04:38 PM (D5qY4)

234 I'm rich, because I say I am. Works just as well, until I try to <em>buy</em> something.

Just keep digging, honey. I don't think you have hit China yet.

Posted by: MarkD at April 04, 2012 05:45 PM (iYBP2)

235
champagne?
no, she don't rate.

box of wine?
little too far the other way...

grocery store bought bottle of Zinfandel is about right for her (on sale)

Posted by: Shoey at April 04, 2012 07:14 PM (m6OUa)

236
She is an 11 by WV standards.

Posted by: sTevo at April 04, 2012 07:56 PM (VMcEw)

237 Uggh....

Uggh, again,...she's a 5 at best, but MAYBE a 6 or 7on the British Adjusted Ugly Scale (and/or cross-dresser scale, 'cuz the Brit's invented this, but I digress)...

Many pints, indeed to get this to 8 or 9...

Posted by: ASSIWIPEE at April 04, 2012 08:05 PM (eS0nh)

238 Looks more like death, standing on a street corner, sucking on a lemon.

Posted by: xiphos at April 04, 2012 09:44 PM (yQY0T)

239
Wow. I heard about this on twitter yesterday but didn't see the pics until now. I had no idea, but apparently I am *smokin hot*, cus she's about my level of cute. All this time when men were ignoring me, I had no idea it's cus I'm so super hot.
Jeezus. Must be nice to be so deluded. Of course now I'm just a woman being bitchy. Can't win.

Posted by: Penny at April 04, 2012 11:33 PM (eFMsP)

240 Blond hair and dark roots. we know your a natural blond from thedumb crapyou wrote but if your going to dye your hair to hide how long in the tooth you are, find a hair stylist that knows what they are doing.
Don't ya love that no matter what the answer you give is, she can claim it makes her beautiful. She has a point but if she wears a hat, no one will notice The Elephant Man could pen the same idiotic article as her and be beautiful by her empty headed logic. Amazing that some people will gladly make an asshat out of themselves in front of the world for 15 minutes of fame.

Posted by: Jody C. at April 05, 2012 05:09 AM (6atzm)

241 I imagine there are folks around who find beauty in a carbuncle.

Posted by: LarryG at April 05, 2012 06:02 AM (q9LWi)

242 Who you gonna believe, Samantha Brick, or your lying eyes?

Posted by: STC at April 05, 2012 07:12 AM (7mrfI)

243 She is beautiful, haven't seen her sober yet. I mean, all that and a penis. Let me get that car door for you.

Posted by: cortezoid at April 05, 2012 10:49 AM (xT3GO)

244 Everything she wrote was entirely correct and blatant - obvious. I don't know why she needed to write it in an article. And, as she says in her second, the reaction to her first article DOES prove her point. It does amuse me at peoples' reactions. however.

But it's not just "looks" that cause these reactions, and it's not just women who pull this bs either.

She should change her name to CAPTAIN OBVIOUS.

Posted by: Poosh at April 05, 2012 01:31 PM (jBvGO)






Processing 0.03, elapsed 0.0402 seconds.
15 queries taking 0.0091 seconds, 253 records returned.
Page size 104 kb.
Powered by Minx 0.7 alpha.

MuNuvians
MeeNuvians
Polls! Polls! Polls!
Frequently Asked Questions
The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick
Top Top Tens
Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)
News/Chat