Toure and The Great Skittle Swindle of 2012

Toure is not what you'd call, what's the word, at average or near-average intelligence level.

He's dumb. Extremely dumb.

Update: Many people are asking "Who the eff is 'Toure'?"

Good question. Honestly, he's nobody. He appears on MSNBC and stuff as an Expert on Being Black. He's an idiot. I've goofed on him before.

Back to post:

Because some people chose to buy Skittles as some sort of dumb tribute to Trayvon Martin, Toure is now agitating that The Community or whatever should get a share of their profits.

This is obviously not the central issue but Skittles' profiteering thanks to us buying it bc of Trayvon obviates some financial donation.

Obviates?

He means "suggests" or "demands" -- that this situation necessitates that Skittles pay The Community or whatever some blood money.

Obviates means the exact opposite of that. "Z obviates Y" means that x makes y unnecessary or forestalls it or prevents it.

Dictionaries, how do they work?

Obligates? A commenter suggests that's what he meant, but suggests that "auto-correct' made the change.

Is "obviates" really high in a computer dictionary's list of active vocabulary words?

Skillets? Trayvon was armed with skillets?

You could ring someone's bell with a skillet. If you have a whole bunch of skillets, you could throw them like, um, Throwing Skillets.

Thanks to lacyunderalls.

Posted by: Ace at 04:33 PM

Comments

1 OBLIGATES. Damn auto correct

Posted by: 2549 at March 29, 2012 04:35 PM (kvxPn)

2 Who's Toure? And why should I care?

Posted by: Dianna at March 29, 2012 04:36 PM (DV/Ik)

3 Looks like I am not the only one that thinks all this Trayvon bullshit is an orchestrated "squirrel". So does Palin.

http://is.gd/NR5Ou6

Posted by: Vic at March 29, 2012 04:36 PM (YdQQY)

4 Who's Toure?

Posted by: Z Ryan at March 29, 2012 04:36 PM (tsC/8)

5 Well, if Z obviates Y then Z makes Y unnecessary, rather than x, which doesn't really enter into it. Not to be an insufferable pedant or anything.

Posted by: joncelli, heartless Con and all around unpleasant guy at March 29, 2012 04:37 PM (RD7QR)

6 Actually, I think he's right. There is absolutely no need for Skittles to make any kind of donation whatsoever.

Posted by: gebrauchshund at March 29, 2012 04:37 PM (iYwUw)

7 Who or what the hell is a Toure?

Posted by: TomInKorea at March 29, 2012 04:37 PM (Y/s90)

8 What the fuck's a Toure?

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at March 29, 2012 04:37 PM (ZKzrr)

9 skittles should stop being so greedy and give

some money to spike lee on account of tradon getting shot

do the right thing skittles you a-holes

#JusticeForTradon

Posted by: Jose Canseco's Gristle Encased Head at March 29, 2012 04:37 PM (+lsX1)

10 Follow the links in the story. It goes back to the NYT.

Posted by: Vic at March 29, 2012 04:37 PM (YdQQY)

11 who the fuck is touré??

Posted by: I AM NOT TREYVON at March 29, 2012 04:38 PM (GdalM)

12 Who is Toure?

Posted by: dogfish at March 29, 2012 04:38 PM (N2yhW)

13 Coincidentally, unicorns shitting skittles is a major component of my energy plan. #IamTrayvonMartin

Posted by: Baraka Obama at March 29, 2012 04:39 PM (PH2pl)

14 Profiteering? Who will save us from the great Skittles shortage of 2012 and the nefarious price gouging of Mars, Inc.?

Posted by: Panicked Race-baiters at March 29, 2012 04:39 PM (ggRof)

15 My mom, rest in peace, taught English at an inner city high school. She tutored the valedictorian, whom she referred to as the "maledictorian," and couldn't understand him the day he came to her, all excited after "he be accepted to Hard-ware."

Wonder if this kid made the law review at Hardware.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 04:39 PM (Af3Wg)

16 Sort of bad to make fun of a guy with tourettes, ace.

Posted by: mike at March 29, 2012 04:39 PM (s6QDI)

17 Who?

Posted by: toby928© at March 29, 2012 04:39 PM (GTbGH)

18 He's the guy who hangs with that foul mouthed woman .

Posted by: Bill D. Cat at March 29, 2012 04:40 PM (npr0X)

19 Skittles should buy George Zimmerman a couple of new handguns.

Posted by: TexasJew at March 29, 2012 04:40 PM (Q7Kbs)

20 Toure is a dude who's apparently an Expert in Being Black. He's on MSNBC and CNN and stuff as an expert on Blackness.

I think he used to be on MTV.

He used to have like dreds or something, because he's hip. He's kind of the Meghan McCain of Black Youth.

Posted by: ace at March 29, 2012 04:40 PM (nj1bB)

21 12 Who is Toure?
Posted by: dogfish at March 29, 2012 04:38 PM (N2yhW)

There's a very famous syndrome named after him.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 04:40 PM (Af3Wg)

22 Toure is a stutteringclusterf*ckofamiserablefailure

Posted by: Chasing Trayvon at March 29, 2012 04:40 PM (chysP)

23 Skillets!

Posted by: Al Sharpton at March 29, 2012 04:40 PM (pLTLS)

24 Now, if Sarah Palin had written that . . .

Posted by: bob loblaw at March 29, 2012 04:40 PM (vIvRs)

25 Toure's been goofed on a fair amount here. sorry, I was assuming people read the blog.

Always a dumb, dumb assumption.

Posted by: ace at March 29, 2012 04:40 PM (nj1bB)

26
That's so cute.

Toure is a little Jesse Jackson shakedown artist.

Posted by: soothsayer at March 29, 2012 04:40 PM (jUytm)

27 I'm willing to bet that he thinks "obviates" is a variant of "obvious."

He thinks he's saying it is obvious that it should be done.

Posted by: Vermin at March 29, 2012 04:41 PM (wSc+u)

28 Who or what the hell is a Toure? Should I even care?

Posted by: Thomas at March 29, 2012 04:41 PM (0/8mQ)

29 14 Profiteering? Who will save us from the great Skittles shortage of 2012 and the nefarious price gouging of Mars, Inc.?
Posted by: Panicked Race-baiters at March 29, 2012 04:39 PM (ggRof)

Sheila Jackson-Lee should be up in arms about this. After all, we did plant the flag on Mars.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 04:41 PM (Af3Wg)

30 Give them skittles...wait, they want money?

Posted by: mike at March 29, 2012 04:41 PM (s6QDI)

31 If he didn't mean "obligates," then my guess is the dumb fuck thought that "obviate" was some kind of verb form of "obvious."

"It's obvious that the candy company should be donating some of that sweet, sweet profit to The Community. The situation obviates this."

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit and ABO Supporter at March 29, 2012 04:41 PM (4df7R)

32 There's a blog that has something to do with these comments ?

Posted by: Bill D. Cat at March 29, 2012 04:41 PM (npr0X)

33 "Z obviates Y" means that x makes y unnecessary or forestalls it or prevents it.

Is it Z or x that's doin' all the obviating? When you start using these substitution variables, I get blinded by math flashbacks.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at March 29, 2012 04:42 PM (k34Gz)

34 Does this mean Obama has to give his campaign hoodie money to the "community"?

Posted by: Heorot at March 29, 2012 04:42 PM (Nq/UF)

35 Skillets!

tiny.cc/z38xbw

Posted by: laceyunderalls at March 29, 2012 04:42 PM (pLTLS)

36 I added a link to the site's previous mentions of Toure.

Posted by: ace at March 29, 2012 04:42 PM (nj1bB)

37 Skittles have an aftertaste like vomit.

Posted by: Teleprompter vs. Etch-A-Sketch 2012 at March 29, 2012 04:42 PM (WJIEn)

38 Taste the Rainbow, asshole.

Posted by: M&M MARS/Masterfoods at March 29, 2012 04:42 PM (GTbGH)

39 Skittles should buy George Zimmerman a couple of new handguns.

And ammo.

Posted by: Retread at March 29, 2012 04:42 PM (joSBv)

40 Vermin: GMTA!

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit and ABO Supporter at March 29, 2012 04:42 PM (4df7R)

41 Barack Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable tyrant.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) SMOD 2012 at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (8y9MW)

42 >>He's kind of the Meghan McCain of Black Youth.

Wikipedia indicates he's not *strictly* dickly.

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (ZKzrr)

43 class is about to begin you idiots

zabransky shot tradon and took his skittles and hoody

now skittles wants to pocket their obviate profits

when tradon gets out of the hospital he should

sue the shit out of zabransky

and skittles as a co-conspiracy

#JusticeForTradon

Posted by: Jose Canseco's Gristle Encased Head at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (+lsX1)

44 Why would you buy Skittles to commemorate the death of some dumb kid you didn't know? Sweetarts are so much better.

Posted by: huerfano at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (bAGA/)

45 Slikettes Ew Chum!

Sharpton with dyslexia

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (Af3Wg)

46 Skittles; I do not think it means what you think it means.

Posted by: Marion Barry's crack cache at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (chysP)

47 I make an annaul charitable contribution of about $5,000 to the Skittles Corporation. I consider their fine candy a public service and I'd hate for them to stop making it. However, the money they're making from the increased Trayvon-related sales obviates the need for my financial donation this year.

Posted by: Average Joe at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (bN5ZU)

48 The writings of Malcolm Z obviates the need for you gen-X hoodie wearers to think for you seffs. Got dat?

Posted by: M. Murcek at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (ToZXn)

49 it shoudl be Obviate
Al Gore (RIP) said
the clikmate is too hot
like porridge
Free Mark McGuire

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (uslQu)

50 Is it Z or x that's doin' all the obviating? When
you start using these substitution variables, I get blinded by math
flashbacks.

Posted by: Anon Y. Mous at March 29, 2012 04:42 PM (k34Gz)

Back off buddy, I'm the alpha pedant here. [Shows teeth, flashes copy of the Chicago Manual of Style]

Posted by: joncelli, heartless Con and all around unpleasant guy at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (RD7QR)

51 FU Tea Party fanatics!

Posted by: Troll at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (4Co17)

52
If I have sex when I oblivate, I could get pregnant.

Posted by: Soothsayer Fluke at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (jUytm)

53 My mom, rest in peace, taught English at an inner city high school. She
tutored the valedictorian, whom she referred to as the "maledictorian,"
and couldn't understand him the day he came to her, all excited after
"he be accepted to Hard-ware."

Wonder if this kid made the law review at Hardware.

Tru-Value University in Cambridge Mass will make sure he graduates, probably with a bullshit major (isn't that what they're for?).

Maybe something like political science...

Posted by: AmishDude at March 29, 2012 04:44 PM (T0NGe)

54 I read a piece by him recently in Time (only thing in office bathroom). Pure, racist garbage. Can't wait until the SCoaMF is out next year and the Toure can whine even louder.

Posted by: eureka! at March 29, 2012 04:44 PM (LQIyD)

55
Ace, you left out tte on Toure.

Posted by: YIKES! at March 29, 2012 04:44 PM (Fx8df)

56
Sure, we read the blog. We read the blog like a Breitbart, G.

Posted by: Z Ryan at March 29, 2012 04:44 PM (tsC/8)

57 C'mon ace, you gotta add the skillets bit : )

Posted by: laceyunderalls at March 29, 2012 04:44 PM (pLTLS)

58 Just another shakedown, and I won't be surprised if it works. (and they're missing an opportunity, need to find out what brand of iced tea he was drinking)

I wonder if Skittles sales really are up. For every person buying them in some sort of victim solidarity, there may be others who don't want to buy a candy now associated with this whole sordid mess. In the end I'm sure Skittles will always have a large market though, gotta feed those unicorns.

OT: MO and the first daughters are on another vacay, this time to Las Vegas. Has there every been a first lady that went on this many vacations without the president while he was in office? You'd almost think they deliberately spend time apart as much as possible.

Posted by: Mayday at March 29, 2012 04:44 PM (orrLR)

59 Maybe something like political science...
Posted by: AmishDude at March 29, 2012 04:44 PM (T0NGe)

Critical Mass Theory.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 04:45 PM (Af3Wg)

60 Obama is a stuttering clusterf*ck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at March 29, 2012 04:45 PM (7W3wI)

61 oh, just for the record? "Community" is quickly marching up the ranks of my Most Hated Words and/or Terms. I've spoken of this list before. "Outreach" and "Synergy" are RIGHTTHERE in a tie at the top. "Community" has quickly jumped up into the top ten and is powering past such old favorites as "equality" and "fairness" and is closing in fast on "diversity."

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit and ABO Supporter at March 29, 2012 04:45 PM (4df7R)

62 They should be seeking some of that sweet Obama Hoodie Monies, too.

Posted by: garrett at March 29, 2012 04:46 PM (TTlQC)

63 @61 -- Don't go there! Talk to the hand!!!

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at March 29, 2012 04:46 PM (uslQu)

64 Does this mean Obama has to give his campaign hoodie money to the "community"?
Posted by: Heorot at March 29, 2012 04:42 PM (Nq/UF) No, that's already money for the cause! Tribute gets paid UP, not DOWN.

Posted by: Z Ryan at March 29, 2012 04:46 PM (tsC/8)

65 Obviate
Obliterate
Ovulate
Bloviate

(Bob Dylan flipping cue cards).

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 04:46 PM (Af3Wg)

66 Taste the critical rainbow theory.

Posted by: Rex Harrison's Hat at March 29, 2012 04:46 PM (4136b)

67 Good let them all eat skittles till their teeth rot out. It's been kinda slow in the Office anyway.

Posted by: nevergiveup at March 29, 2012 04:46 PM (eCnLg)

68 #53, Tru-Value Hardware affiliates in Cambridge, MA operate as "Economy Hardware".

Posted by: BlueFalcon in Boston would be forever alone without AoS at March 29, 2012 04:46 PM (KCvsd)

69 Simpler. Toure is one of those people who pepper their writings with 50-cent words they don't know the meaning of, in order to appear intelligent.

Like Hollywood stars and wannabes wearing clear lens glassess to look "smart."

Posted by: Count de Monet at March 29, 2012 04:46 PM (4q5tP)

70 Watch out for shifting paradigms.

Posted by: M&M MARS/Masterfoods at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (GTbGH)

71 Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit and ABO Supporter at March 29, 2012 04:45 PM (4df7R)

Where does "utilize" fall in that list?

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) SMOD 2012 at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (8y9MW)

72 Only the comments, Ace. Only the comments.

Posted by: dogfish at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (N2yhW)

73 It is really the sine qua non of liberal economic thought: I am buying your stuff because I like your stuff. You owe me money because you're profiting off of me.

Posted by: AmishDude at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (T0NGe)

74 Skittles. How do they work?

Posted by: Soona at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (i3MF7)

75 67 Good let them all eat skittles till their teeth rot out. It's been kinda slow in the Office anyway.
Posted by: nevergiveup at March 29, 2012 04:46 PM (eCnLg)

And Medicare will pay you back. LOL!

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (Af3Wg)

76 How can he be stupid? He's on MSNBC. Do Flaming Hot Cheetos and Grape Pop also owe it to the Toure?

Posted by: ejo at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (URqVp)

77 oh, just for the record? "Community" is quickly
marching up the ranks of my Most Hated Words and/or Terms. I've spoken
of this list before. "Outreach" and "Synergy" are RIGHTTHERE in a tie at
the top. "Community" has quickly jumped up into the top ten and is
powering past such old favorites as "equality" and "fairness" and is
closing in fast on "diversity."

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit and ABO Supporter at March 29, 2012 04:45 PM

Level playing field, boots on the ground, around the kitchen table. If I never heard those things again, I'd be a happier person.

Posted by: huerfano at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (bAGA/)

78 "Outreach" and "Synergy" are RIGHTTHERE in a tie at the top.

They beat out "green"? I'm so sick and tired of everything "green".

Posted by: Heorot at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (Nq/UF)

79 o/t But I have to vent and scream right now. Went to the bank 2 hrs ago and stayed for 2 hours. MY ACCOUNT IS MISSING!!!! $6700 HAS DISAPPEARED1111. The tellers have no idea what happened there's no records of me in their system and they know me by name so they know I'm not conning them. This is so fucked. I have to lose a day's work tomorrow to try and fix this somehow. Oh yeah, it's end of the month so car and insurance payments are supposed to come out of that account Monday. Fuck my life. Digital records suck.

Posted by: fozzy at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (FEzSe)

80 OBLIterATES!

Posted by: Jose "Chips" Canseco at March 29, 2012 04:48 PM (r2PLg)

81 I don't expect the White Man to masticate the sheer vasectomy of the situation. Skittles, by their very matriculation of the circumcision surrounding the tragic death of our Young Brother, has ipso facial become liabilitized by the aforementioned situation.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff speaks Jive at March 29, 2012 04:48 PM (G/8zE)

82 Skittles. How do they work?

Kinda like Meth, but sweeter.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) SMOD 2012 at March 29, 2012 04:48 PM (8y9MW)

83 Wow, talk about mindlessly showing your cards. Yes, we know... racial grievance-mongering is almost always a thinly-veiled extortion racket. Most of its practitioners are slightly more skilled at hiding that fact, though.

Posted by: JR at March 29, 2012 04:48 PM (gWOju)

84 just another shakedown

Everybody wants into the crowded line.

Posted by: Bob Seger at March 29, 2012 04:48 PM (TTlQC)

85 Cause black means white people giving you their money.

Posted by: Jack at March 29, 2012 04:49 PM (zKFOT)

86 Those evil candy barons, what won't they profiteer off of?

Posted by: Rex Harrison's Hat at March 29, 2012 04:49 PM (4136b)

87 OBLIGATES is giving him too much credit. But, I've got money on that being his excuse.

Posted by: 2549 at March 29, 2012 04:49 PM (kvxPn)

88 If You ATES the Skittles Uze got to pay the polar bear!!

Posted by: Jose "Chips" Canseco at March 29, 2012 04:49 PM (r2PLg)

89 I'm getting tired of people who were apparently named with eye charts.

Posted by: nickless at March 29, 2012 04:49 PM (MMC8r)

90 And Medicare will pay you back. LOL!
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (Af3Wg)

Well Medicare does not pay for Dentistry, Medicaid does, but I don't' take medicaid since I prefer to both not lose money and not fuck people royally by doing G-D awful terrible work.

Posted by: nevergiveup at March 29, 2012 04:49 PM (eCnLg)

91 Obama is earning every dime in his fight for progress.

Posted by: GlobalWarmingFeminist at March 29, 2012 04:49 PM (4Co17)

92 @79 -- man, that sucks...good luck, foxzy.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at March 29, 2012 04:49 PM (uslQu)

93 Bringing this over from one of Ace's earlier Toure posts:

So we get exhibitions like this pencil-necked pansy ass, who frankly looks like he's had more dick in him than a season of Bewtiched, laying down all sorts of smacktalk about quavering white men.

*dabbing eyes with delicate lace handkerchief* That's beautiful, ace. Just beautiful.

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit and ABO Supporter at March 29, 2012 04:49 PM (4df7R)

94 Posted by: Empire of Jeff speaks Jive at March 29, 2012 04:48 PM (G/8zE)

That there demands to be read in Eric Michael Dyson Pentameter. Testify.

Posted by: Rex Harrison's Hat at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (4136b)

95 Yesterday at work I had a very frustrating phone call with a client and then afterwards felt bad for being annoyed because it was clear that she was, um, how to put this, not precisely in the upper quintile in intelligence. I kind of feel that way about Toure. It's not really his fault for sounding like an idiot what with the whole being one and all.

Posted by: alexthechick - SMOD 2012 at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (VtjlW)

96 Pizza is evil.

Posted by: GlobalWarmingFeminist at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (4Co17)

97 He was accidentally right.

Posted by: Entropy at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (TULs6)

98 Foreign Policy quotes U.S. diplomats as saying “We’re now watching what Israel is doing in Azerbaijan. And we’re not happy about it” • A series of quiet political and military understandings have won Israel access to these air bases, senior U.S. sources explain.
Senior American diplomats and military intelligence officers have told Foreign Policy magazine that the United States now believes that Israel has been granted access to air bases in Azerbaijan, which shares a border with Iran. “The Israelis have bought an airfield,” a senior official told Foreign Policy in early February, “and the airfield is called Azerbaijan.”...

Posted by: steevy at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (7W3wI)

99 Where's YUM YUM the Bear!?

Posted by: Jose "Chips" Canseco at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (r2PLg)

100
The muliferation of the processes thereby white anglo saxophones that have used them in the past, using the syntology of the black male to do their emphrasized notions of connuptional intercourse, has always been a scoungelized verison of the mangramatic programmal interlocutional ebiddid.

Posted by: Rev Dr E Buzz Romney at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (tcSZb)

101 I am sure he meant obviates. I have seen people use it in this (wrong) context before, and always when trying to feign elitism.

I agree, skittles should send them $1.49.

Posted by: Guy Mohawk at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (Yie26)

102 I think he accidently let slip what he was trying to do which was Obfuscate. But being an idiot he said Obviate

Posted by: Buzzsaw at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (tf9Ne)

103 Wasn't there a character on In Living Color that also used words in that nonsensical way? It's been so long since I watched it that I can't remember the name.

Posted by: ejo at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (URqVp)

104 OBLIGATES is still wrong. It would be OBLIGES.

Posted by: nickless at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (MMC8r)

105 Vermin: GMTA!

That's obviate.

Posted by: Vermin at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (wSc+u)

106 89
I'm getting tired of people who were apparently named with eye charts.

Posted by: nickless at March 29, 2012 04:49 PM (MMC8r)
Jeremy Clarkson (Brit Top Gear host) said that Obama was named by drawing Scrabble tiles from a bag.

Posted by: fozzy at March 29, 2012 04:51 PM (FEzSe)

107 Oh wow, fozzy, that's awful! I'll be praying for a quick and easy solution for you!

{{fozzy}}

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit and ABO Supporter at March 29, 2012 04:51 PM (4df7R)

108 79
Don't you have any hard copy documentation of your account?

Posted by: kallisto at March 29, 2012 04:51 PM (jm/9g)

109 How much filthy lucre did Mars make from the Skittles those peaceful protesters liberated from that Walgreens? Reparations now!

Posted by: Panicked Race-baiters at March 29, 2012 04:51 PM (ggRof)

110
We don't know him.

Posted by: Kolo and Yaya at March 29, 2012 04:51 PM (bPbwB)

111 No one has mentioned unicorns. What about the unicorns?

Posted by: mare at March 29, 2012 04:51 PM (A98Xu)

112 I admire those of you able to replicate Jose Canseco's "poetry".I am afraid to even attempt it.

Posted by: steevy at March 29, 2012 04:51 PM (7W3wI)

113 Posted by: steevy at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (7W3wI)

That's obama's way trying to fuck Israel royally and prevent them from attacking Iran by leaking as much secret shit as possible. Yeah my fellow Jews, go vote for obama?

Posted by: nevergiveup at March 29, 2012 04:51 PM (eCnLg)

114 It's ObliterATES-Let me put a learn on you.

Posted by: Jose at March 29, 2012 04:51 PM (r2PLg)

115 Posted by: nevergiveup at March 29, 2012 04:49 PM (eCnLg)

Wasn't goofing on you, Dr. Just the thought of these thugs wanted a gold grille delivered to them on a silver platter.

Be sure and use lots of mercury in their amalgam.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 04:52 PM (Af3Wg)

116 I agree, skittles should send them $1.49.

With a note saying "We have nothing to do with your preposterous race baiting, in the future please use Starburst".

Probably not but it would be fun.

Posted by: Entropy at March 29, 2012 04:52 PM (TULs6)

117 If you type in 'obiates' to a firefox browser, the first auto-correct suggestion is....

Posted by: weft cut-loop at March 29, 2012 04:52 PM (qOfw/)

118 I'm pretty sure I'd shoot anyone coming at me with skillets.

Posted by: tangonine at March 29, 2012 04:52 PM (x3YFz)

119 Tourette de farce

Posted by: model_1066 at March 29, 2012 04:52 PM (YbQJm)

120 The other term which needs explication is "the community."

Usually, when one makes demands for a third party to "contribute" to "The Community," that community is defined in one of two ways:

1. As a euphemism for himself, as self-designated Representative and Receiver of Largesse for The Community; or

2. The greater subset of parasites with their hands out of which the speaking parasite is a member.

Posted by: Adjoran at March 29, 2012 04:52 PM (VfmLu)

121 Also, Skittles (whoever owns it) is not "profiteering" from the TrayVon protests. Just "profiting". I hope they donate some money to the George Zimmerman Legal Defense Fund, since after all he's the one who put their brand in the news.

Posted by: infovore at March 29, 2012 04:52 PM (0llFJ)

122 Level playing field, boots on the ground, around the kitchen table. If I never heard those things again, I'd be a happier person.
Posted by: huerfano at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (bAGA/)

At the end of the day, we'll need to know the bottom line on tasking our resources to dynamically add robust functionality to our deliverables which will creat synergy across the enterprise.

Posted by: Count de Monet at March 29, 2012 04:52 PM (4q5tP)

123 Wasn't goofing on you, Dr. Just the thought of these thugs wanted a gold grille delivered to them on a silver platter.

Be sure and use lots of mercury in their amalgam.
Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 04:52 PM (Af3Wg)

I know I know you were kidding.

Posted by: nevergiveup at March 29, 2012 04:53 PM (eCnLg)

124 Maybe he meant OPIATES.

Posted by: nickless at March 29, 2012 04:53 PM (MMC8r)

125 Maybe "obviates" means obligates in Ebonics.
I had a black boss a while back who always used "cognitive" when he meant "cognizant".

Posted by: sestamibi at March 29, 2012 04:53 PM (L6Vqs)

126 when hal gore died alot of people

bought containers of lard to celebrate his life

so i know what toure is going through and why

he feels betrayed

#JusticeForTradon

Posted by: Jose Canseco's Gristle Encased Head at March 29, 2012 04:53 PM (+lsX1)

127 Al Sharpton: genius.

Posted by: tangonine at March 29, 2012 04:53 PM (x3YFz)

128 What are y'all conversatin' about?

Posted by: Empire of Jeff speaks Jive at March 29, 2012 04:53 PM (G/8zE)

129 107
Oh wow, fozzy, that's awful! I'll be praying for a quick and easy solution for you!

{{fozzy}}

Posted by: MWR, Proud Tea(rrorist) Party Hobbit and ABO Supporter at March 29, 2012 04:51 PM (4df7R)
Thanks, I'm bouncing up and down right now. The damned bank has been bought and split and sold and merged so often lately that my number finally came up on the "screw the customer" lottery.

Posted by: fozzy at March 29, 2012 04:54 PM (FEzSe)

130 Toure's been goofed on a fair amount here. sorry, I was assuming people read the blog.

Always a dumb, dumb assumption.

Posted by: ace at March 29, 2012 04:40 PM (nj1bB)

YOU don't read your own blog, why should we?/remembering old AoS memes

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at March 29, 2012 04:54 PM (tQoT4)

131 This shit all up in here just got real! And shit.

Posted by: Toure at March 29, 2012 04:54 PM (/ZZCn)

132 Hey, Breitbart! You reading this shi'ite, wherever you are? Un-freakin'-believable . . .

Posted by: Adjoran at March 29, 2012 04:54 PM (VfmLu)

133 Raise the mimimum wage. Lets make come progress like Europe. Actually, Europe does not have the debt per capital like USA. War spening in USA is out of control.

Posted by: GlobalWarmingFeminist at March 29, 2012 04:54 PM (4Co17)

134 HEY IDIOTS! I know you love your HFCS and artificial coloring, but all you have to do to stop them from making money is to STOP BUYING THE SKITTLES. It's not rocket science.

Posted by: Christina Hendricks at March 29, 2012 04:54 PM (w2aGf)

135 I'm surprised Louis Farrakhan hasn't alreadyweighed in withthe numerological aspects of l'affaire Trayvon.

Posted by: kallisto at March 29, 2012 04:54 PM (jm/9g)

136 44 Why would you buy Skittles to commemorate the death of some dumb kid you didn't know? Sweetarts are so much better.
Posted by: huerfano at March 29, 2012 04:43 PM (bAGA/)

Fuck Sweetarts, it's almost Easter. Cadbury Creme Eggs FTW!!!

Posted by: Mandy P. voted and is All Dead Inside now at March 29, 2012 04:55 PM (qFpRI)

137 Coming to the Summer Olympics.

Posted by: The Skillet Throw at March 29, 2012 04:55 PM (Yie26)

138 Malapropism of the day.

Posted by: Retread at March 29, 2012 04:55 PM (joSBv)

139 81I don't expect the White Man to masticate the sheer vasectomy of the situation. Skittles, by their very matriculation of the circumcision surrounding the tragic death of our Young Brother, has ipso facial become liabilitized by the aforementioned situation.Posted by: Empire of Jeff speaks Jive at March 29, 2012 04:48 PM (G/8zE) Am I remembering correctly or was there a Damon Wayans character on Fridays that used to do that bit? Hysterical. First thing I thought of when I read this...

Posted by: JQ Public at March 29, 2012 04:55 PM (NBj0d)

140

To bad Trayvon wasn't carrying Astroglide and a turkey baster

Posted by: YIKES! at March 29, 2012 04:56 PM (Fx8df)

141 But I have to vent and scream right now. Went to
the bank 2 hrs ago and stayed for 2 hours. MY ACCOUNT IS MISSING!!!!
$6700 HAS DISAPPEARED1111. The tellers have no idea what happened
there's no records of me in their system and they know me by name so
they know I'm not conning them. This is so fucked. I have to lose a
day's work tomorrow to try and fix this somehow. Oh yeah, it's end of
the month so car and insurance payments are supposed to come out of that
account Monday. Fuck my life. Digital records suck.

Posted by: fozzy at March 29, 2012 04:47 PM (FEzSe)
DAY-um...you're right, fozzy, that's fucked. I hope you get things straightened out tomorrow, that's got to be a scary feeling...

Posted by: antisocialist at March 29, 2012 04:56 PM (j/nZn)

142 Oh yeah, it's end of the month so car and insurance payments are supposed to come out of that account Monday.

Step 0: If you can afford to, secure counsel. Yes, really.

Step 1: Get the Branch Manager to sign something (it's a bank, so there's a good chance there's a notary on-site, too) to send to anyone expecting money from you in the next couple of weeks. It'll need to explain that- yes, your account did exist as of xyz date, and yes, it's bank error that caused the problem. If the tellers really recognize you (especially if you have a checkbook, or a debit/ATM/Check card, or even just a card with your account number on it), this should not be difficult.

Step 2: The bank must (as in: will face major fines from the Fed and the FDIC if they don't) have physical record of your account. As long as your account is active, and for 7 years after your account becomes inactive (that is: you close it) they're required to keep the physical paperwork somewhere. Tell them to find it. If they give you any grief, ask for their Compliance Officer and/or their Head Cashier. These are both required positions at any bank, and they don't want to be bothered with this- they'll see that it gets fixed.

Now, there may be a problem with making sure the money in the account is right. You'll need documentation (a balanced checkbook plus your most recent statement should suffice) to prove how much should be in there.

If, at any step, the bank becomes less than cooperative, sic your counsel on them. Part of FDIC insurance is to take care of issues similar to this.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) SMOD 2012 at March 29, 2012 04:56 PM (8y9MW)

143 Does the SN in MSNBC stand for "special needs"?

Posted by: model_1066 at March 29, 2012 04:56 PM (YbQJm)

144

True, there is a poliferation of pacifically culturally anglo-americans who take the interlinguishing of the jewish, in this case the hymies, to the extents that we have a corrunption of the systemically SYSTEMACTICALLY oppressivenation, it can only be surprised that there is a patternation of nullification and protestantation.

Posted by: Rev Dr E Buzz Bunny at March 29, 2012 04:56 PM (tcSZb)

145 81- I haven't laughed so hard all week, thanks.

Posted by: Heralder at March 29, 2012 04:56 PM (/Mxso)

146 Let's see how long it takes Mama Trayvon to get in touch with Toure.

Posted by: Mayday at March 29, 2012 04:57 PM (orrLR)

147 Toure's syndrome - Li- Lib - Li - Lib - Li - RACISTTTTTTTTTT...

Posted by: M. Murcek at March 29, 2012 04:57 PM (ToZXn)

148 103Wasn't there a character on In Living Color that also used words in that nonsensical way? It's been so long since I watched it that I can't remember the name.Posted by: ejo at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (URqVp)

YES - THAT WAS IT - In Living Colour. Fucking hilarious. Thanks! (was going to drive me nuts...)

Posted by: JQ Public at March 29, 2012 04:57 PM (NBj0d)

149 Instead of eating Skittles, Trayvon should have Skedaddled.

Posted by: Not an Artist at March 29, 2012 04:57 PM (Lo/3Q)

150 Raise the mimimum wage.

How much should we raise the mimimum wage? Are we obviated to raise it to $10/hour? $100/hour?

Let's make it $10,000/hour and then we can all be rich.

3. Profit!

Posted by: AmishDude at March 29, 2012 04:57 PM (T0NGe)

151 Living in a blackosphere has its effects, doesn't it? Reading those twitter feeds of Trayvon's, is like a descent into the maelstrom, a life in which one obviates any need for the "standard" English we know.

Posted by: I am the egg man, . . . at March 29, 2012 04:57 PM (EETMo)

152 Ace: You. Have. Too. Many. VARIABLES.

Posted by: joncelli, heartless Con and all around unpleasant guy at March 29, 2012 04:57 PM (RD7QR)

153 Are you sure that's not the 'what-what-in the butt' guy?

Posted by: nickless at March 29, 2012 04:57 PM (MMC8r)

154 First, I'm associated with that scumbag, Obama. Now, I'm associated with that scumbag, Trayvon. Who do I sue?

Posted by: Skittles-shitting Unicorn at March 29, 2012 04:58 PM (ggRof)

155 Toure? Is he the metro-sexual black dude with dread lockes and smart people, black rimmed glasses??
**
Yeah...he's a fag!

Posted by: dananjcon at March 29, 2012 04:58 PM (8ieXv)

156 WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK SKITTLES?!?!?

Posted by: Professor Derrick Bell at March 29, 2012 04:58 PM (MMC8r)

157 there's no records of me in their system

Wait until you get home and there's another Darrin there.

Posted by: Dick York at March 29, 2012 04:59 PM (GTbGH)

158 A cross between Norm Crosby and Terence Aloisius "Slip" Mahoney.

"...a very interesting seduction. Routine 3."

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 04:59 PM (Af3Wg)

159
Luckily for my laptop, I failed to have a mouth full of Guinness when I saw the Skillet video.

That there's some funny shit, Ima tellin' ya'.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, feeling all extra curmudgeony today at March 29, 2012 04:59 PM (d0Tfm)

160 Wtf ace the Three Stooges hit each other with skillets all the time and nothing happened.

It's a freaking sham-trasty

Posted by: Mr Pink at March 29, 2012 04:59 PM (eacNI)

161 You lose 5 meat.

Posted by: Sammy Skillet at March 29, 2012 04:59 PM (Yie26)

162 156
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK SKITTLES?!?!?

Posted by: Professor Derrick Bell at March 29, 2012 04:58 PM (MMC8r)
There ARE black skillets.

Posted by: tangonine at March 29, 2012 04:59 PM (x3YFz)

163 I'm going to buy some skittles.

Posted by: RO at March 29, 2012 05:00 PM (/yw0X)

164 WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK SKITTLES?!?!?
Posted by: Professor Derrick Bell at March 29, 2012 04:58 PM (MMC8r)
**********
I sold them to the aliens.

Posted by: Ronald Reagan at March 29, 2012 05:00 PM (ggRof)

165 How can the kidz buy Skittles when it's on the list of banned foods from Nanny Moochelle and other lefty food nazis?

Posted by: kbdabear at March 29, 2012 05:00 PM (Y+DPZ)

166 "Killer not under life extenuating circumstances".

Posted by: Al "Skillets" Sharpton at March 29, 2012 05:00 PM (LQIyD)

167 At the end of the day, we'll need to know the bottom
line on tasking our resources to dynamically add robust functionality
to our deliverables which will creat synergy across the enterprise.

Posted by: Count de Monet at March 29, 2012 04:52 PM

The sad part is, we've got to start thinking outside the box and get back to basics.

Posted by: huerfano at March 29, 2012 05:00 PM (bAGA/)

168 So when does Jell-O pony up to Ace?

Pudding snacks don't grow on trees.

Posted by: Mr Fever Head at March 29, 2012 05:00 PM (SzAZ7)

169
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK SKITTLES?!?!?

We traded them to the aliens for those little marshmallows.

Posted by: Heorot at March 29, 2012 05:01 PM (Nq/UF)

170 Case 43,987 of the The Professional, Unbiased Press

Headline
GOP-run House easily rejects Obama budget.

The vote
414 - 0

Nope, no bias there. No siree.

http://tinyurl.com/ckx9daa

Posted by: weft cut-loop at March 29, 2012 05:01 PM (qOfw/)

171 The Department of Justice may indict South Carolina Republican Gov. Nikki Haley on charges of tax fraud, according to the Palmetto Public Record, a South Carolina political blog.

PPR reported that a “highly ranked” federal government official “privately confirmed rumblings of an investigation” and the “possible indictment of the governor.” The report said the official, however, could not provide a specific time frame.

However, two “well-placed legal experts” said the DOJ indictment could come as early as next week, according to the report.

The alleged tax fraud reportedly occurred during Haley’s time managing finances for the Sikh worship center in South Carolina run by her father, Dr. Ajit Singh Randhawa.

Posted by: nevergiveup at March 29, 2012 05:01 PM (eCnLg)

172 Resist we much. Eggs is white, skillets black.
This is your brain on skillets. Any questions?

Posted by: Clutch Cargo at March 29, 2012 05:01 PM (Qxdfp)

173 Whatever happened to that woman who sued everyone from her son's school because someone allegedly slapped him? The lawsuit was bigger than the 2,700 page health care bill. Even M&M Mars was sued.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 05:01 PM (Af3Wg)

174
@139,

Yeah, he was in prison talking on a payphone.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff speaks Jive at March 29, 2012 05:01 PM (G/8zE)

175 it obviates the losses due to shoplifting

Posted by: Dr. Science at March 29, 2012 05:01 PM (8Yc/9)

176
If I may be pacific! If I may be pacific!!!

Posted by: Rev Dr E Buzz Bunny at March 29, 2012 05:02 PM (tcSZb)

177
What the fuck's a Toure?

A Toure is what they call a guywho has uncontrolled bursts of profanity. A woman who is afflicted with this malady is called a Tourette.

Posted by: Sharkman at March 29, 2012 05:02 PM (RtpCp)

178 Looks like he had his verb orientated the wrong way.

Posted by: grognard, SMOD-Squad at March 29, 2012 05:02 PM (NS2Mo)

179 Posted by: steevy at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (7W3wI) That's obama's way trying to fuck Israel royally and prevent them from attacking Iran by leaking as much secret shit as possible. Yeah my fellow Jews, go vote for obama?
Posted by: nevergiveup at March 29, 2012 04:51 PM (eCnLg)

--------------------------------------

At this point, I don't think Netanyahu gives a shit. It could also be a well constructed ruse.

Posted by: Soona at March 29, 2012 05:02 PM (i3MF7)

180 “The Israelis have bought an airfield,” a senior official told Foreign
Policy in early February, “and the airfield is called Azerbaijan.”

Damn those Israelis with their Israeli money!

Posted by: a senior official who is not an antisemite, no really at March 29, 2012 05:03 PM (QTHTd)

181 Oswald Bates Meets the Parole Board, from In Living Color. I love Damon Wayans. http://tinyurl.com/62m52f3

Posted by: no good deed at March 29, 2012 05:03 PM (mjR67)

182 Skillets! Taste the brainflow.

Posted by: Clutch Cargo at March 29, 2012 05:03 PM (Qxdfp)

183 Touré (born on March 20, 1971) is an American novelist, essayist, music journalist, cultural critic, and television personality based in New York City. You may now continue.

Posted by: @SOEarpiece at March 29, 2012 05:03 PM (GTbGH)

184 165 How can the kidz buy Skittles when it's on the list of banned foods from Nanny Moochelle and other lefty food nazis?

Posted by: kbdabear at March 29, 2012 05:00 PM (Y+DPZ)

Ha. Ever been on a NYC subway? Scores of little Trayvons go through the cars, selling candy to buy "basketball uniforms" or "raising money for the school."

The candy is purchased with food stamps at a discount and sold at a profit. Jeez, that's almost capitalism.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 05:03 PM (Af3Wg)

185 Kool-Aide be fixin' a give me some stash

Posted by: Sleeper at March 29, 2012 05:03 PM (qZb8X)

186 Legal Insurrection brought up that nowhere in the police report does it indicate that TM had Skittles and iced tea on his person or around the shooting scene.

The "fact" that TM was only armed with Skittles was thrown in there by the Martin family lawyer

I'm sure that jenny will let me know for a FACT that Trayvon said "Don't shoot! You can have my Skittles!"

Posted by: kbdabear at March 29, 2012 05:03 PM (Y+DPZ)

187 Resist we much. Eggs is white, skillets black.
This is your brain on skillets. Any questions?
Posted by: Clutch Cargo at March 29, 2012 05:01 PM (Qxdfp)

**************

It's skillets be black.

Posted by: Jose "Chips" Canseco at March 29, 2012 05:03 PM (r2PLg)

188 >>How can the kidz buy Skittles when it's on the list of banned foods from Nanny Moochelle and other lefty food nazis?

Just swipe your EBT!

Posted by: HeatherRadish™ at March 29, 2012 05:03 PM (ZKzrr)

189 Skilllets? Or, Killets?

Posted by: mike at March 29, 2012 05:04 PM (s6QDI)

190 At this point, I don't think Netanyahu gives a shit. It could also be a well constructed ruse.
Posted by: Soona at March 29, 2012 05:02 PM (i3MF7)

Maybe but all reports lately seem to indicate obama is out to submarine Israel

Posted by: nevergiveup at March 29, 2012 05:04 PM (eCnLg)

191 172 Resist we much. Eggs is white, skillets black.
This is your brain on skillets. Any questions?
Posted by: Clutch Cargo at March 29, 2012 05:01 PM (Qxdfp)

One day, there may be skillets applied to the brains.

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at March 29, 2012 05:04 PM (Af3Wg)

192 If that isn't the Kettle calling the Skittles Black...or something.

Posted by: '52 Esquire at March 29, 2012 05:04 PM (7982t)

193 Resist Skillets we much!

Posted by: Reverend Not-so-Sharp-ton at March 29, 2012 05:04 PM (lLeix)

194 How can the kidz buy Skittles when it's on the list of banned foods from Nanny Moochelle and other lefty food nazis?

--

Can you imagine having MO as your mother? And BO as your father. Those poor kids, seriously. It'll be interesting to see how they turn out in a few years. Come to think of it, the spawn of Carter and Clinton have for the most part stayed out of the limelight, unlike their parents, so maybe they will too.

Posted by: Mayday at March 29, 2012 05:04 PM (orrLR)

195

Posted by: fluffy at March 29, 2012 05:04 PM (z9HTb)

196 I spoke to a friend last night, and while I hate to get on some conspiracy bandwagon, he said something that I never thought of - and which might explain why Al Sharpton, a racist piece of human turd, is on this case like the Pink Panther sniffing some Frenchman's panties:

When the black community heard that the shooter's name was "Zimmerman," how many said to themselves, "I bet he's a JEW! A JEW shot a black boy!"

Now that "Zimmerman" is not black but Hispanic, they still want to milk it for all it is worth, but the "Jew shot a black boy, and now we can't hunt some goddamn Jews" story is out the window.

I wonder...is that why this thing got so heated so fast?

Posted by: Anson Mitchell at March 29, 2012 05:04 PM (IhUxK)

197 I'm speechless.

Posted by: fluffy at March 29, 2012 05:05 PM (z9HTb)

198 Skillets! Taste the brainflow.
Posted by: Clutch Cargo at March 29, 2012 05:03 PM (Qxdfp)

*********

Gross! LMAO!

Posted by: Jose "Chips" Canseco at March 29, 2012 05:05 PM (r2PLg)

199 But what about Yoo-Hoo?

Posted by: I am the egg man, . . . at March 29, 2012 05:05 PM (a362c)

200
Ohgod, I have tears in my eyes from laughing.
I.T. and Skillets! Tell us more, Lilly uh Lillia Lu..ciano?

Posted by: Z Ryan at March 29, 2012 05:05 PM (tsC/8)

201
I'm speechless.

Apparently so are Tour(ettes) and Al "I'm a racist" Sharpton.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) SMOD 2012 at March 29, 2012 05:06 PM (8y9MW)

202 The latest photo of Martin:

http://goo.gl/hh9AY

Posted by: mike at March 29, 2012 05:06 PM (s6QDI)

203 This thread is one speed shy of plaid .

Posted by: Bill D. Cat at March 29, 2012 05:06 PM (npr0X)

204 Damn! If I was only born an idiot and liberal I could be rich!

Posted by: Jehu at March 29, 2012 05:06 PM (JQ1k+)

205 maybe you idiots should look into your own brain

spike lees son was just shot for a bag of skittles

ha ha very funny

lets see how you like it if a guy shot your son

for like a pack of hot tamales

you would want some of that money to

#JusticeForTrabon

Posted by: Jose Canseco's Gristle Encased Head at March 29, 2012 05:06 PM (+lsX1)

206 Are the makers of Vaseline and Kleenex going to have to subsidize porn?

Posted by: fluffy at March 29, 2012 05:06 PM (z9HTb)

207 If MSDNC cared about 1) ratings, or 2) having a racist thug who cannot speak three words of the English language without making a fool of himself anchor one of their shows, they would be less of a joke than they are now.

Posted by: Anson Mitchell at March 29, 2012 05:07 PM (IhUxK)

208 Those evil Skittles people are going to pay. They are making obscene profits off the backs of the Black candy eaters. I propose eliminating all Skittle tax subsidies.

Posted by: Baracka at March 29, 2012 05:07 PM (T1nDt)

209 I'm obviated to get nauseated over all the shit coming out of the mouths of these so called "experts" on racism. Sorry but they are all fucked up

I know, I denounce myself

Posted by: the hobbit fomerly known as Donna at March 29, 2012 05:07 PM (ZHge+)

210 flash Story at The DC: Nikki Haley will replace Tim Geitner as Treasury Secretary. (Link below.)

Posted by: Jay Bee at March 29, 2012 05:07 PM (Xwgt3)

211 Son of a bitch is trying to horn in on my racket. I'm the one who perfected corporate blackmail for personal profit.

Posted by: Da Revrunt Jesse Jackson at March 29, 2012 05:07 PM (OlN4e)

212
@181

Lickus my probiscus. Undouche me! Bwahahahahahahaha...oh...that brings back memories. Funny shit. Gracias.

Posted by: JQ Public at March 29, 2012 05:08 PM (NBj0d)

213 Booked on Phonics worked for Toure. http://tinyurl.com/7rjoqy2

Posted by: no good deed at March 29, 2012 05:08 PM (mjR67)

214 "Ohgod, I have tears in my eyes from laughing.
I.T. and Skillets! Tell us more, Lilly uh Lillia Lu..ciano?"

I am shocked that Fat Al didn't call her "Lucky Luciano."

Posted by: Anson Mitchell at March 29, 2012 05:08 PM (IhUxK)

215 Tourette's syndrome made him say that shit.

Posted by: I am the egg man, . . . at March 29, 2012 05:09 PM (a362c)

216 148 103Wasn't there a character on In Living Color that also used words in that nonsensical way? It's been so long since I watched it that I can't remember the name.Posted by: ejo at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (URqVp)

YES - THAT WAS IT - In Living Colour. Fucking hilarious. Thanks! (was going to drive me nuts...)
Posted by: JQ Public at March 29, 2012 04:57 PM (NBj0d)

Yes, the character Anton Jackson, played by Damon Wayans.
See him in court, here: http://youtu.be/Ab-SHeGB8yc

Posted by: Count de Monet at March 29, 2012 05:09 PM (4q5tP)

217 What's cookin, Sharpton?

Posted by: Black Skittle at March 29, 2012 05:09 PM (Yie26)

218 I love zub zub. He makes me laugh and laugh with his bear ways.

Posted by: Sarahw at March 29, 2012 05:09 PM (LYwCh)

219 Off topic but

JERUSALEM - Two reports today about Iran's nuclear program and the possibility of an Israeli military strike have analysts in Israel accusing the Obama administration leaking information to pressure Israel not to bomb Iran and for Iran to reach a compromise in upcoming nuclear talks.

"It seems like a big campaign to prevent Israel from attacking," analyst
Yoel Guzansky at the Institute for National Security Studies told ABC
News. "I think the [Obama] administration is really worried Jerusalem will attack and attack soon. They're trying hard to prevent it in so many ways."

In a column this afternoon titled "Obama Betraying Israel?" longtime
defense commentator Ron Ben-Yishai at Yedioth Ahronoth newspaper angrily
denounced the leaks as a "targeted assassination campaign."

Barry betray Israel. What are the chances?

Posted by: TheQuietMan at March 29, 2012 05:10 PM (1Jaio)

220 Toure's Syndrome: A malady characterized by linking disconnected and random words together in the mistaken belief that one is makingsense, while to the rest of the world one is merely a mindless fucking retard.

Posted by: LGoPs at March 29, 2012 05:10 PM (lHn6+)

221 lets see how you like it if a guy shot your son for like a pack of hot tamales"

Al Sharpton only cares for people who eat fried chicken and watermelon.

And drink I.T. and eat Skillets.

Ladies and gentlemen, may I present one Dumb fucking asshole, Al Sharpton.

Posted by: Anson Mitchell at March 29, 2012 05:10 PM (IhUxK)

222 Outside his house.
Late at night.
See his guarddog.
Do he bite?
Kill my landlord.
Kill my landlord.
Slip in his window.
Break his neck.
Then his house,
I start to wreck,
Got no reason.
What the heck?
Kill my landlord.
Kill my landlord.
C-I-L-L, My landlord.

Posted by: Hydrocarbon Liberation Front at March 29, 2012 05:10 PM (NVu2l)

223 He's no Don King.

Posted by: BigJohn at March 29, 2012 05:10 PM (xA0JA)

224
You have no idea how close to real life that Oswald Bates skit really it.

Posted by: mike at March 29, 2012 05:10 PM (s6QDI)

225
Throwing Skittles is a ninja trick. They learned it from Chuck Norris.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at March 29, 2012 05:10 PM (TOSyM)

226 Homey the clown ?

Posted by: Bill D. Cat at March 29, 2012 05:10 PM (npr0X)

227 @Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) SMOD 2012 at March 29, 2012 04:56 PM (8y9MW)

Thank you sincerely Allen and everyone. A plan of action was what I needed to stop me panicking.

Posted by: fozzy at March 29, 2012 05:11 PM (FEzSe)

228

Trayvon he much had skillets on is persona is no reason to shooted him.

Posted by: Al Sharpton at March 29, 2012 05:11 PM (Fx8df)

229 Skillets....we much?

Posted by: grognard, SMOD-Squad at March 29, 2012 05:12 PM (NS2Mo)

230 When I was a wee munchkin, skillet was a euphamism for black people by some white trash kids in my 'hood, as was burnt biscuit.

Posted by: Ms Choksondik at March 29, 2012 05:12 PM (fYOZx)

231 Comedy gold! MSNBC may get more viewers, just for the laughs at Sharpton.

Did you check out the Wise Latina's face as he struggled to pronounce her name? Don't feel back, Lula Lilia Luboa, he does it to everybody.

BTW tried to eat a Skillet today and burned my mouth bad. Should have waited till it cooled off after breakfast. Still tasted like bacon tho so that's good.

Posted by: PJ at March 29, 2012 05:12 PM (DQHjw)

232 The jailhouse lawyer dude is Oswald Bates.

Posted by: mike at March 29, 2012 05:12 PM (s6QDI)

233 The alleged tax fraud reportedly occurred during Haley’s time managing
finances for the Sikh worship center in South Carolina run by her
father, Dr. Ajit Singh Randhawa.

This is from the let's-dig-up-all-obscure-tax-records-of-Republicans office of the IRS.

It opens up with every Democrat administration, but apparently people think that Nixon was the only one who had it. Remember all the conservative groups that got audited during the Clinton administration? It was an epidemic. The IRS even admitted to targeting groups that "got into the news". Of course, I read that as a threat: Don't come out against the White House and get in the papers or else...audit.

With the problems this WH has with religion, especially minority religions (I'm looking over to the synagogues now) you would think they would hold off on (1) attacking a religion with a (2) politically-sensitive prosecution.

My first guess is that this is all bluster, designed to put a cloud over Haley. The Lt. Gov. just got bounced from office.

This would be pretty old stuff, why bring it up now? Well, the investigation probably started the second she got elected governor.

My second guess is that it's exceedingly technical, obscure and subject to interpretation. All people will hear is "indicted", they won't be able to evaluate how bogus the charges are by themselves.

But primarily, I think we're hearing about this because the case is so incredibly weak that they have to do the political damage pre-indictment.

These people are pure evil and I won't believe anything they say about Nikki on this matter.

Posted by: AmishDude at March 29, 2012 05:12 PM (T0NGe)

234 Profiteering? Did the candy company raise the price of their product to make a bunch of extra money? Or did they pressure "The Community" to go out and buy their product as a tribute to the Decedent?

They made a profit. That's not "profiteering." You keep using that word, Toure. I do not think it means what you think it means. "Profiteering" would be like, silkscreening a whole Chinese container ship full of "Occupy Everything" tee-shirts, promising to give a piece to The Movement, and then reneging. Oh, wait...

So besides "skillets" and "obviate," there's a third word this buttclown misuses. English, Toure! DO? YOU? SPEAK? IT?

/rant off.

Posted by: Keith Arnold at March 29, 2012 05:13 PM (Jdtsu)

235 Skillets? Trayvon was armed with skillets?

No, Skrillex. Trayvon had a boombox and was playing Skrillex. No way a jury is going to convict Zimmerman in that case.

Posted by: Brendan at March 29, 2012 05:13 PM (2jQGY)

236 221 -- Al Sharpton only cares for people who eat...

We disavow such characterizations of Al Sharpton (except the last part).

Posted by: Jay Bee at March 29, 2012 05:14 PM (Xwgt3)

237 Now the big story is that Martin had no bruises per the embalmer. However, once your heart stop beating, you stop seeping, i.e, bruising, swelling, etc. Plus, slugging someone doesn't automatically cause bruising.

Posted by: mike at March 29, 2012 05:14 PM (s6QDI)

238 A bag of Skillets is more self-aware than the Wrong Reveruhnd Al Not-So-Sharpton.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy, feeling all extra curmudgeony today at March 29, 2012 05:14 PM (d0Tfm)

239 Oh, I see now!

Trayvon, Trabon, Uban, whatever his name was, WAS ARMED WITH A DEADLY FRYING PAN.

Al Sharpton said he had a "skillet."

I bet he just robbed a restaurant and attacked the poor Mr. Zimmerman with a hot (as in stolen) frying pan.

After all, Al Sharpton, WHO NEVER LIES, said it - so it must be true, right?

Posted by: Anson Mitchell at March 29, 2012 05:15 PM (IhUxK)

240 Skittles acquired.

TASTE THE RAINBOW!

Posted by: RO at March 29, 2012 05:15 PM (/yw0X)

241 @233 - Agreed. That was my take basically as well. Don't believe a word of it anymore. 100% of the time, they're certain to be caught lying. No need to listen anymore.

Posted by: JQ Public at March 29, 2012 05:16 PM (NBj0d)

242 Oswald Bates, that's the character. Had him mixed up with Anton Jackson character. Damon is funny as shit in both roles.

Posted by: Count de Monet at March 29, 2012 05:16 PM (4q5tP)

243 Is Lilly Lillia Lou... ciano? a white hispanic?

Posted by: Z Ryan at March 29, 2012 05:16 PM (tsC/8)

244 Skittles can be very refreshing!

Posted by: Chris Matthews at March 29, 2012 05:16 PM (mQMnK)

245
Taste the Painbow.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at March 29, 2012 05:17 PM (TOSyM)

246 no one reads ace blog
only the comments, said Breitbart
Toure idiot, surely is

Posted by: SantaRosaStan at March 29, 2012 05:17 PM (Dll6b)

247 I'm not buying any Haley allegations until they come from non-anonymous sources and/or non-lefty blogs or Cocksucker-Americans like Will Folks.

Posted by: nickless at March 29, 2012 05:18 PM (MMC8r)

248 It sure is smelly in here. I am Al Sharpton's asshole, and Al Sharpton IS an asshole.

What a lonely world. Look where the fuck I got stuck.

Posted by: Al Sharpton's Asshole at March 29, 2012 05:18 PM (IhUxK)

249 Just another shakedown, and I won't be surprised if it works. (and they're missing an opportunity, need to find out what brand of iced tea he was drinking)
Posted by: Mayday at March 29, 2012 04:44 PM (orrLR)

From what I know it was suppossedly Arizona Ice Tea. That is a bit problematic.
Oh and Ace. What the hell happened to Zub Zub the Bear?

Posted by: Ma Bell at March 29, 2012 05:18 PM (uVuwp)

250 I wonder if the Skittles were paid for?

Posted by: RC at March 29, 2012 05:19 PM (mQMnK)

251 You white crackers are all racist!

Posted by: Jesse Jackson at March 29, 2012 05:19 PM (fYOZx)

252 Never bring a bag of Skittles to a gun fight.

Posted by: Confusion Says... at March 29, 2012 05:19 PM (BVkEs)

253
Y U buyin' Skittles, homies?
I didn' even like those sugar turds!

Posted by: Trey-Vonage -- young poet of the urban streets -- taken form us too soon at March 29, 2012 05:19 PM (0AClR)

254 I love my straightened Cauca..... Caucka-kay....... Cocka-cajun hair!

Hep me! Hep me Lilly-uh, Lilly-uh Lucy-on-o!

Now pass me duh Skillets, Ice-T!

Posted by: Reverend Not-so-Sharp-ton at March 29, 2012 05:20 PM (lLeix)

255 Maybe Zimmerman should ask for a sponsorship from Smith and Wesson.

Posted by: nickless at March 29, 2012 05:20 PM (MMC8r)

256 In this entire thread, not an emoticon of sympathy.

Posted by: Jugs McCain at March 29, 2012 05:20 PM (Hx5uv)

257 George Bush hates Skittles.

Posted by: Kanye West at March 29, 2012 05:20 PM (BVkEs)

258 Dude, that's the way "ebonics" works. Black is the opposite of White, right? So when they use a word in it's "Black" sense, it means the exact opposite of it's normal "White" meaning,

Therefore Black "obiviates" = "obligates."

When a black person says he is going to "axe" someone, do you really think they are going to take an axe to that person? Of course not, they are going to politely inquire something of that person--kind of the opposite of brutally murdering them.

On the other hand if a person of color every says "Let me me ask you", you should run like crazy* because they are about to go all Lizzie Borden on your ass.

(This is hypothetical of course. One assumes that any Person of White would already have begun running once the black person started moving in their general direction.)

Posted by: Kasper Hauser at March 29, 2012 05:21 PM (HqpV0)

259 That's "from", mofos, not "form"!

Posted by: Trey-Vonage -- young poet of the urban streets -- taken from us too soon at March 29, 2012 05:21 PM (0AClR)

260 "Is Lilly Lillia Lou... ciano? a white hispanic?"

I bet they find that she has a friend who has a friend who has a friend who has a friend who once ate somewhere that George Zimmerman once ate in.

And you know what that means...

LUCKY LUCIANO THE REPORTER IS PART OF THE CONSPIRACY TO DENY FLAVON FLAV AND HIS FAMILY JUSTICE!!!

Posted by: Anson Mitchell at March 29, 2012 05:22 PM (IhUxK)

261 I hate Whitey, but I loves my Whitey straight-perm Doo!

Community Agitate we much!

Posted by: Reverend Not-so-Sharp-ton at March 29, 2012 05:23 PM (lLeix)

262 He uses obviate to mean "made obvious.". I used to hear this in college from the usual shouldnt-be-in-college crowd.

Posted by: pinchy migra at March 29, 2012 05:23 PM (HBGK+)

263 What's that in the searchlight beam over there? A bag of Skittles?

That's a Call for Justice!

Posted by: Trey-Vonage -- young poet of the urban streets -- taken from us too soon at March 29, 2012 05:24 PM (0AClR)

264 I haven't seen a White Hispanic maligned this badly since Rich Sanchez was run out of Atlanta.

Posted by: Lock Step at March 29, 2012 05:25 PM (ETgqz)

265 It's "sparkling" a national outcry, this is.

With sparklers.

Posted by: jimmuy at March 29, 2012 05:25 PM (kSaUf)

266 Should have been a Not Safe For Brain Cells warning on that video.

Posted by: AndrewsDad at March 29, 2012 05:25 PM (C2//T)

267 A plan of action was what I needed to stop me panicking.

I'm not sure which bank you're with, but I suspect (other than bureaucratic hassles) you won't have too much trouble, really.

Frankly, one of the tellers you were talking to should have gotten an account rep (whatever they call them at your bank, probably a "personal banker"), who would have walked you through just about everything I just did. They probably would have left out the "get a lawyer" part, and they might not have thought of the letter for your creditors, but I have the benefit of distance and disassociation.

Just remember: this isn't your fault (it may be no one's "fault" exactly), and you are guilty of nothing. This piece of advice is as important when dealing with your creditors as it will be when dealing with the bank.

Posted by: AllenG (Dedicated Tenther) SMOD 2012 at March 29, 2012 05:26 PM (8y9MW)

268 They said that Trayvon was carrying a dumbbell when he was shot. I said, "So Al Sharpton WAS there!"

Posted by: Anson Mitchell at March 29, 2012 05:26 PM (IhUxK)

269 Notice how the skin tone in Zimmerman's photo keeps getting lighter and lighter?

Posted by: Dang at March 29, 2012 05:26 PM (BbX1b)

270
One if by land and two if ice tea
And I on the opposite shore shall be
Snarfin' Skittles...

Posted by: Trey-Vonage -- young urban street poet & his feet show it! at March 29, 2012 05:27 PM (0AClR)

271 Now the big story is that Martin had no bruises per the embalmer.
However, once your heart stop beating, you stop seeping, i.e, bruising,
swelling, etc. Plus, slugging someone doesn't automatically cause
bruising.

--

Zimmerman says Martin laid him out with one punch, then slammed Z's head into the ground and punched him in the face. It sounds like the fight was pretty one-sided, so I don't think it means anything than Martin is unbruised. It's consistent with the scenario of Martin being the aggressor.

Posted by: Mayday at March 29, 2012 05:28 PM (orrLR)

272 269
Notice how the skin tone in Zimmerman's photo keeps getting lighter and lighter?

Posted by: Dang at March 29, 2012 05:26 PM (BbX1b)

Thanks.

Posted by: MSM Photoshop Ink at March 29, 2012 05:28 PM (BVkEs)

273 Now the big story is that Martin had no bruises per the embalmer. However, once your heart stop beating, you stop seeping, i.e, bruising, swelling, etc. Plus, slugging someone doesn't automatically cause bruising.
Posted by: mike at March 29, 2012 05:14 PM (s6QDI)

--------------------------------

Blunt force soft tissue trauma, whether it's seen grossly or microscopically,still happens. An embalmer is not a pathologist. I'm sure the report from the ME's office will indicate whether he had soft tissue damage or not (other than the gaping bullet hole).

Posted by: Soona at March 29, 2012 05:28 PM (i3MF7)

274 Enjoy your Skittles more with a bottle of TWO IF BY TEA!

Posted by: Rush at March 29, 2012 05:30 PM (MMC8r)

275 Is Al Sharpton saying that the rapper Iced Tea killed Treyvonnie Martin?

Posted by: Anson Mitchell at March 29, 2012 05:30 PM (IhUxK)

276 Were there any Skittles found in Zimmerman's system?

Posted by: S Daniel at March 29, 2012 05:31 PM (BVkEs)

277
Notice how the skin tone in Zimmerman's photo keeps getting lighter and lighter?

Posted by: Dang at March 29, 2012 05:26 PM (BbX1b)

Were gonna add blonde highlights next.

Posted by: MFM at March 29, 2012 05:31 PM (Fx8df)

278 Skittles are so sour.

Posted by: Dang at March 29, 2012 05:31 PM (BbX1b)

279 Does anyone knew where I can get a "Best of Al Sharpton's Fucking Up the English Language" videos? I would love to release them on a CD, the way K-Tel puts out records from Anne Murray or shit like that.

Posted by: Anson Mitchell at March 29, 2012 05:32 PM (IhUxK)

280 "He appears on MSNBC and stuff as an Expert on Being Black."

That tells me all I need to know about whether the guy is worth paying attention to.

Posted by: Blacque Jacques Shellacque at March 29, 2012 05:32 PM (1rHeD)

281 I have in my possession a leaked video provided to me by the US Justice Dept. that shows George Zimmerman's father discarding his son's white hood and robe in a landfill!

His license plate is clearly readable despite the hail storm and dense fog.

GAMECHANGER WHITE BITCHES!

Posted by: Trayvon's Mom's Lawyer & New Cock Daddy at March 29, 2012 05:32 PM (ETgqz)

282 "Were there any Skittles found in Zimmerman's system?"

Did they test Slavonnie Martin for Skittles residue?

Posted by: Anson Mitchell at March 29, 2012 05:33 PM (IhUxK)

283 An embalmer is not a pathologist.

Obviatesly!

Posted by: Toure, Toure| sounds dumb | PeeEssEnBeeSee | Gots 'um! at March 29, 2012 05:33 PM (0AClR)

284 34 Does this mean Obama has to give his campaign hoodie money to the "community"?
Posted by: Heorot at March 29, 2012 04:42 PM (Nq/UF)
************
Nah, he gets a pass because of all thebillions he's already contributed to The Community from his stash (i.e., the U.S. Treasury).

Posted by: Jesse Jacksun at March 29, 2012 05:34 PM (WvS06)

285 Skittles and crackers. Mmm...

Wait. The Skittles won't stay on the cracker. Keep rolling off.

(This is getting ugly.)

Posted by: Dang at March 29, 2012 05:34 PM (BbX1b)

286 Damn this fucking regime for turning otherwise good-hearted people into racists. I hate these motherfuckers.

Posted by: Soona at March 29, 2012 05:35 PM (i3MF7)

287 Mayday, how's the yoga going? are you bendy yet?
Not to ignore ole Toure, who bends English.

Posted by: Pecos, still yearning for Perry at March 29, 2012 05:36 PM (2Gb0y)

288 Coming soon1 Inspired by Sandra Fluke!

Clitoral hoodies!

Profits go to Planet Parenthoodie!

Posted by: Toure, Toure| sounds dumb | PeeEssEnBeeSee | Gots 'um! at March 29, 2012 05:37 PM (0AClR)

289 286Damn this fucking regime for turning otherwise good-hearted people into racists. I hate these motherfuckers.Posted by: Soona at March 29, 2012 05:35 PM (i3MF7)Uh huh. All those poor, good, kind-hearted racists.

Posted by: JQ Public at March 29, 2012 05:38 PM (NBj0d)

290 58 Just another shakedown, and I won't be surprised if it works. (and they're missing an opportunity, need to find out what brand of iced tea he was drinking)Posted by: Mayday at March 29, 2012 04:44 PM (orrLR)
****************

It's been reported it was Arizona Ice Tea. And you know how racist all dem crackers in Arizona is. They'd best be donatin' their entire state treasury to The Community, in the name of racial justice, elsewise we may jus' have to go down there and kick some cracker azz (and I hear they have a lot of doze "white hispanics" down there too).

Posted by: Al Not Too Sharp-ton at March 29, 2012 05:38 PM (WvS06)

291 Question: If someone took a crap on Al Sharpton's head, would anyone other than Fat Al notice?

Better yet - would anyone other than Fat Al care?

Posted by: Anson Mitchell at March 29, 2012 05:39 PM (IhUxK)

292 The autopsy revealed no undigested skillets in the deceased's system.

Posted by: Dr. Pepper, Sanford Caroner at March 29, 2012 05:40 PM (KWdVT)

293 'The Community' = Victim + Perpetrator

Posted by: nickless at March 29, 2012 05:40 PM (MMC8r)

294 Tweet me for my E-Z Cheesy Skittles Bake recipe!

Posted by: Toure, Toure| sounds dumb | PeeEssEnBeeSee | Gots 'um! at March 29, 2012 05:41 PM (0AClR)

295 Skillets are dangerous. In "Eating Raoul", Paul and Mary Bland used one to kill their clients.

Posted by: Pervy Grin at March 29, 2012 05:42 PM (OxKj2)

296 The government pays for my skittles.

Posted by: Sandra Fluke at March 29, 2012 05:43 PM (mQMnK)

297 They call me MISTER Toure!

Posted by: MISTER Toure at March 29, 2012 05:43 PM (axc/z)

298 Damn this fucking regime for turning otherwise good-hearted people into racists. I hate these motherfuckers.

Giving Toure a pass on his obvious fucking ignorance because of the soft bigotry of low expectations is racist.

Pretending like people who partake of thug culture are just as good as other people because of the soft bigotry of low expectations is racist.

Posted by: FRONT TOWARD LEFT at March 29, 2012 05:43 PM (p7SSh)

299 Blacks: Always Demanding A Payday They Haven't Earned!

Posted by: Skittles at March 29, 2012 05:44 PM (ETgqz)

300 295
Skillets are dangerous. In "Eating Raoul", Paul and Mary Bland used one to kill their clients.
Posted by: Pervy Grin at March 29, 2012 05:42 PM (OxKj2
Secant only to terminator bed head in causewaying sudden death of young chilruns, skillet head has become a notational epistemic!

Posted by: Toure, Toure| sounds dumb | PeeEssEnBeeSee | Gots 'um! at March 29, 2012 05:48 PM (0AClR)

301 Question: If someone took a crap on Al Sharpton's head, would anyone other than Fat Al notice?

I saw that cocksucking piece of shit at Reagan National in the A terminal in the fall of 2008. I had just had a shitty day traveling home, was badly hungover, and had been waiting for my bags about twenty minutes at that point. I gave that fucking animal the nastiest glare I could muster. One of his entourage started heading toward me, and Sharpton called him back.

I bet that dumbfuck thinks I owe him a "thank you."

Posted by: FRONT TOWARD LEFT at March 29, 2012 05:48 PM (p7SSh)

302 I thought Toure was the recently outed leader of Mali?

Oh wait, this is one of those self-important pricks who goes by a single name even though no one knows or cares who the fuck he is.

Posted by: logprof at March 29, 2012 05:49 PM (ykSKg)

303 Mayday, how's the yoga going? are you bendy yet?

__

Good memory! And I did go to a yoga class this morning. I don't know how other people cope with living in the era of Zero, but it helps me.

Posted by: Mayday at March 29, 2012 05:54 PM (orrLR)

304 Giving Toure a pass on his obvious fucking ignorance because of the soft bigotry of low expectations is racist.

Pretending like people who partake of thug culture are just as good
as other people because of the soft bigotry of low expectations is
racist.

Posted by: FRONT TOWARD LEFT at March 29, 2012 05:43 PM (p7SSh)
--I really wish this point were brought up by the R's more. For example, on the voter ID issue, when the D's claim it's unfair to minorities. I wish for once an R would say we have full confidence that citizens of every race are more than capable of obtaining an ID, just like you need to see an R rated movie or buy a drink. Are you saying that you think your constituents are idiots, too stupid to take the steps to drive a car, or rent a movie, or any of the thousands of everyday activities that require an ID?

Posted by: Mayday at March 29, 2012 06:01 PM (orrLR)

305 Although I usually refrain from commenting here because I'm just too stupid to keep up, I think that the following comment is the thread winner:

100

The muliferation of the processes thereby white anglo saxophones
that have used them in the past, using the syntology of the black male
to do their emphrasized notions of connuptional intercourse, has always
been a scoungelized verison of the mangramatic programmal
interlocutional ebiddid.

Posted by: Rev Dr E Buzz Romney at March 29, 2012 04:50 PM (tcSZb)

Thanks Rev, I'm going to be laughing all the way home.

Posted by: gilmour concepcion at March 29, 2012 06:01 PM (xqrGi)

306 Damnit, I have skittle scat all over my patent leather pumps. FU Unicorns!

Posted by: Christina Hendricks at March 29, 2012 06:06 PM (w2aGf)

307 301
Question: If someone took a crap on Al Sharpton's head, would anyone other than Fat Al notice?

I saw that cocksucking piece of shit at Reagan National in the A
terminal in the fall of 2008. I had just had a shitty day traveling
home, was badly hungover, and had been waiting for my bags about twenty
minutes at that point. I gave that fucking animal the nastiest glare I
could muster. One of his entourage started heading toward me, and
Sharpton called him back.

I bet that dumbfuck thinks I owe him a "thank you."

Posted by: FRONT TOWARD LEFT at March 29, 2012 05:48 PM (p7SSh)
I'll bet you were thinking "Please make the mistake of touching me..."

Posted by: tangonine at March 29, 2012 06:32 PM (x3YFz)

308 Coming soon: The Skittle Riots of 2012.

Posted by: ChristyBlinky: ABO 2012 at March 29, 2012 06:38 PM (baL2B)

309 Isn't "Toure" a disease that makes you swear and shit?

Posted by: andycanuck at March 29, 2012 06:47 PM (6RnvM)

310 Just Mau-Mauing the flackcatchers.

Posted by: Mau-Mau for O-bah-mao at March 29, 2012 07:29 PM (4gH8K)

311 Skillets we much.

Posted by: Reverunt Al at March 29, 2012 07:33 PM (4gH8K)

312 "Dyslex we much"

Posted by: ronnie at March 29, 2012 07:42 PM (/kzTY)

313 In my hood yu walkin round wit a bag o skillets an ICE "T" yu up to sumpin, jus sayin,

Posted by: D-lo at March 29, 2012 07:45 PM (qiO49)

314 "life extenuating circumstances"???

Good grief, what a clown. Was Sharpton the model for the Oswald Bates "Booked on Phonics" character in the old TV show In Living Color? "Allow me to expectorate the meaning of this..."

Posted by: pst314 at March 29, 2012 08:57 PM (mFPMV)

315 Oops, I see that others have already cited Oswald Bates. Should have scanned the thread before commenting.

Posted by: pst314 at March 29, 2012 09:00 PM (mFPMV)

316 Do you think skillets can obviate cholera? Because I think I've got cholera.

Posted by: Sarahw at March 29, 2012 09:06 PM (LYwCh)

317 I just realized that pooping skillets would be incredibly challenging. No wonder these poor unicorns are extinct. Damn Republicans.

Posted by: Christina Hendricks at March 29, 2012 09:35 PM (w2aGf)

318 the great skittle swindle......its a swindle !

Posted by: barry66 at March 29, 2012 10:26 PM (LRc9K)

319 Spelling bee we much.

Posted by: Wonkish Rogue at March 29, 2012 10:54 PM (E0ihX)

320 Ace obviated my anger. That bastard.

Posted by: Kevin at March 29, 2012 11:07 PM (3o64G)

321 You know, Trayvon would still be alive if Obama had followed through on his promise to provide a skittle-shitting unicorn for every home.

Posted by: Disappointed at March 30, 2012 12:50 AM (5ySTW)

322 The question is would Martin be alive today if Obama had delivered on his promise of a Free Unicorn that poops Skittles in every home?

Posted by: Rocks at March 30, 2012 11:12 AM (Q1lie)

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