You Won't Have Contessa Brewer To Kick Around Anymore

Unless, I guess, if you pay for a private session.

Contessa Brewer, who has been a fixture on MSNBC since 2003, will no longer be an anchor on the network, TVNewser has learned.

For the last year-and-a-half Brewer has anchored the NoonET hour on MSNBC as well as hosting the weekend documentary series “Caught on Camera.” Her final daily newscast is tomorrow but she will continue to host “Caught” and work on other projects for NBC News and MSNBC.

She is one of the dumbest, most blatantly biased gutterscrunts on MSNBC; she's basically Ed Schultz with a smaller rack.

She will be missed.

Posted by: Ace at 06:29 PM



Comments

1 Good riddance to bad rubbish.

Posted by: Vic at August 25, 2011 06:30 PM (M9Ie6)

2 Maybe we should chip in and send her a Sybian to ride. (google it)

Posted by: Curmudgeon at August 25, 2011 06:31 PM (ujg0T)

3 She is one of the dumbest, most blatantly biased gutterscrunts on MSNBC; she's basically Ed Schultz with a smaller rack dick.




Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:32 PM (UOM48)

4 "...gutterscrunts ... she's basically Ed Schultz with a smaller rack..."

Another Diet Coke nasal enema. When will I learn?

Posted by: JFK's adrenal gland at August 25, 2011 06:33 PM (Xv7f/)

5 That is an insult to gutterscrunts everywhere!

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 06:34 PM (2j/Mv)

6

Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton...what's the diff, really?

Posted by: Wodeshed at August 25, 2011 06:35 PM (SgLsM)

7 I bet you know who I am now honkey ho.

Posted by: Al Dull Sharpton at August 25, 2011 06:35 PM (4nfy2)

8 3
She is one of the dumbest, most blatantly biased gutterscrunts on MSNBC; she's basically Ed Schultz with a smaller rack dick.


Guess you haven't been in the MSNBC locker room lately.

Posted by: Keef and Rachel at August 25, 2011 06:35 PM (Xv7f/)

9 ....and Al Sharpton has better ratings than Chris Mathews.....

Posted by: SkandiaRecluse at August 25, 2011 06:35 PM (t2hzr)

10 Best line about her stupidity from Don Imus;

"She won't be bringing the potato salad to the MENSA picnic"

Posted by: kbdabear at August 25, 2011 06:36 PM (Y+DPZ)

11 She is one of the dumbest, most blatantly biased gutterscrunts on MSNBC

And that's a tough competition.

Posted by: Tami at August 25, 2011 06:36 PM (X6akg)

12

But, resist we much! We must, and we will much, about, that, be committed.

Posted by: Al Sharpton at August 25, 2011 06:36 PM (BAjNF)

13 Another Diet Coke nasal enema

Try it with Wild Turkey 101...I'd rather roll around in broken glass then jump into a pool of hot sauce than experience that again...

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 06:36 PM (2j/Mv)

14 Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton...what's the diff, really?
You know, she was right about that.

Posted by: Curmudgeon at August 25, 2011 06:37 PM (ujg0T)

15 Obama is a stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable failure.

Posted by: steevy at August 25, 2011 06:38 PM (pV6cO)

16 Do you have a degree in whoring?

Posted by: Mo Brooks at August 25, 2011 06:38 PM (Zs83Q)

17 This gives her more time to rent her mouth out to hobos.

Posted by: wooga at August 25, 2011 06:39 PM (2p0e3)

18 I'm happy to say I've never seen Caught on Camera. And never will.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:39 PM (UOM48)

19 *guttercunts

(Corrected. You're welcome.)

Posted by: Walter Freeman at August 25, 2011 06:39 PM (UsjBj)

20 Its kinda funny, that after msnbc got busted on for calling the tea party racist and then everybody made fun of them for their pale skinned line-up, they started changing things around. Typical of libs, never heard on meritocracy. Not that any of their line-up had or has merit.

Posted by: Guy Fawkes at August 25, 2011 06:39 PM (4nfy2)

21 MSNBC needs to loan her out to the Weather Channel this weekend.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:40 PM (UOM48)

22 @Guy

More accurate to say libs think that their rules are for others to follow.

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 06:41 PM (2j/Mv)

23 Contessa Brewer? MSNBC??

Posted by: Tsar Nicholas II at August 25, 2011 06:41 PM (f8XyF)

24 Remember when C*ntessa Brewer (an ugly, decadent, flea-bitten, presumptuous, arrogant, stupid, gutterslut of a whore) tried to "school" Rep Mo Brooks.

Me too.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at August 25, 2011 06:41 PM (c0A3e)

25 Iguess that they'll be hiring Jessse Jacksn now to add more diversity of skin color along with the Al "Tawana" Sharpton. I wonder if they've considered Ward Churchill. I hear that he's an Indian.

Posted by: Max Entropy at August 25, 2011 06:41 PM (lH6z9)

26 My prediction, which I will put 100 bucks on.

There will never be an episode of Caught on Camera where they catch someone watching Caught on Camera.

Posted by: Mr Pink (not in a good mood today) at August 25, 2011 06:42 PM (rrdsd)

27 12


But, resist we much! We must, and we will much, about, that, be committed.



Posted by: Al Sharpton at August 25, 2011 06:36 PM (BAjNF)
Moving.. very moving. I laughed...... I cried...

Posted by: Jumbo Jogging Shrimp tea party terrorist and Perry supporter at August 25, 2011 06:42 PM (qjUnn)

28 She's so dumb she thought the capital of China was Chinatown.

Posted by: Guy Fawkes at August 25, 2011 06:42 PM (4nfy2)

29 Brewer out!!
Tripoli Trixie in!!
Sporadic gunfire and wounded cameramen nightly.

Posted by: John Wayne aka McClintock at August 25, 2011 06:43 PM (DPU1J)

30 Contessa, baby girl, resist you much!

Posted by: Revrum Al, yes, THAT one! at August 25, 2011 06:43 PM (Zgfnd)

31
You misspelled her name, fur-ball.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 25, 2011 06:43 PM (3AuGS)

32 But, MSNBC still have the oh so lovely and dumb Norah O'Donnell....
Gutterscrunt, indeed Sir!

Posted by: Goldwanger at August 25, 2011 06:43 PM (kduZC)

33 C*ntessa Brewer is so stupid that she thought a Quarterback was a refund.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at August 25, 2011 06:44 PM (c0A3e)

34 MSNBC needs to loan her out to the Weather Channel this weekend.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:40 PM (UOM4

Now that's some funny right there.

Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 06:44 PM (/PFGQ)

35 I told Contessa drinks were on the house. She went to get a ladder.

Posted by: Guy Fawkes at August 25, 2011 06:44 PM (4nfy2)

36
#12, Aw, damn, I beat me to it!

Posted by: Revrum Al, yes, THAT one! at August 25, 2011 06:45 PM (Zgfnd)

37
she hosts Caught on Camera?

that's funny cuz here is Contessa Brewer getting caught touching up her lips

Posted by: soothsayer at August 25, 2011 06:45 PM (Xs7AG)

38 Case in point re comment 22...

Me: if you think petroleum and SUVs are killing the planet, why do you own an SUV?

Lib: I just use it to go up to the mountains for skiing and fishing!

Me: Oh, so you wantonly rape the earth, poisoning the air and condemning future generations to misery and hunger just so you can selfishly indulge in your white, upper middle class leisure activities? I thought you were a member of the Sierra Club!

Lib: <sputtering rage>

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 06:46 PM (2j/Mv)

39 Yeah, but is she a * Natural Born Citizen * ?

Posted by: grease monkey at August 25, 2011 06:46 PM (VSWPU)

40 Cuntessa is gone? Shit I needed the shade

Posted by: Al, the guy who still owes a million dollar judgement at August 25, 2011 06:46 PM (PZiww)

41 My Spidey Sense tells me that Contessa finally refused to go down on a media honcho.

Posted by: jukin at August 25, 2011 06:46 PM (vkkNZ)

42 She's as useless as rubber lips on a woodpecker.

Posted by: Guy Fawkes at August 25, 2011 06:47 PM (4nfy2)

43 C*ntessa damn near froze to death at a drive in

The movie she said she was going to see?
"Closed for the Winter"

Posted by: kbdabear at August 25, 2011 06:47 PM (Y+DPZ)

44 Heh. I just imagined C*ntessa, Sgt. Schultz, Madcow, Chrissy, and Larry O'Donnell, the draft-dodging draft-dodger who dodged the draft, all huddled together in a house on the beach on Long Island this weekend, with their supplies limited to booze, a hammer, and one roll of toilet paper.

Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:47 PM (UOM48)

45 LAUGHED OUT LOUD!!!!!!!!!Ahhhhhhhhh, that was great.

Posted by: California Doomin tea party terrorist and proud of it bitch at August 25, 2011 06:47 PM (8DdAv)

46 She is one of the dumbest, most blatantly biased gutterscrunts on MSNBC; she's basically Ed Schultz with a smaller bigger rack dick.

Posted by: Wdavisterry at August 25, 2011 06:48 PM (EG/p1)

47 Who will take her place, SE Cupp??

Posted by: dananjcon at August 25, 2011 06:49 PM (roFKc)

48 @44

If he wasn't riding the barbed cock of Satan right now, I'd throw Ted Kennedy into that mix....and only one bottle of scotch.

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 06:49 PM (2j/Mv)

49 Contessa's so stupid that she thought the London Underground was a resistance movement...

Posted by: GuyfromNH at August 25, 2011 06:50 PM (kbOju)

50 More stupidity from C*ntessa:

About the Times Square terrorist:

CONTESSA BREWER (7:06): I mean the thing is is that and I get frustrated and there was part of me that was hoping this was not going to be anybody with ties to any kind of Islamic country because there are a lot of people who want to use this terrorist intent to justify writing off people who believe in a certain way or
come from certain countries or whose skin color is a certain way. I
mean they use it as justification for really outdated bigotry.

And so there was part of me was really hoping this would not be the case that here would be somebody who is not the defined. I mean he’s accused he’s arrested you know I don’t want to convict him before it’s time to do so.
He’s the guy authorities say is involved. But that being said I mean we
know even in recent history you have the Haitari militia from Michigan
who have plans to let’s face it create terror.

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at August 25, 2011 06:50 PM (c0A3e)

51 Sad thing is.. MSLSD idiots whore themselves out for the liberal cause.. then when they get canned.. who the hell will hire them? They have lost all credibility that they could even pretend to be non biased.
Who the hell is hiring this wind bag?

Posted by: Jumbo Jogging Shrimp tea party terrorist and Perry supporter at August 25, 2011 06:51 PM (qjUnn)

52 I can't tell 'em apart.

Posted by: Contessa Brewer at August 25, 2011 06:52 PM (1fB+3)

53 Contessa Brewer, who has been a fixture on MSNBC ... Yeeeeah, but what kind of fixture?

Posted by: Faffner the Cat at August 25, 2011 06:52 PM (8DdAv)

54 44
Heh. I just imagined C*ntessa, Sgt. Schultz, Madcow, Chrissy, and Larry
O'Donnell, the draft-dodging draft-dodger who dodged the draft, all
huddled together in a house on the beach on Long Island this weekend,
with their supplies limited to booze, a hammer, and one roll of toilet
paper.


Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:47 PM (UOM4
My money is on Rachel Maddow being the only survivor, as she is probably the only one who knows how to properly swing a hammer.

Posted by: wooga at August 25, 2011 06:52 PM (2p0e3)

55 Heh! Don't hold back, Don....

Brewer, a former news reader on Imus’ show, also said the I-man doesn’t
know how to relate to “beautiful women.” “With that fat ass she’s got,
she wouldn’t be one of ‘em,” Imus said on the air Friday. “That skank
has to spend three hours with makeup in the morning … Who’s she kidding?
. . . Plus, she’s dumber than dirt … Oh, my God, what a pig. But I was
willing to cut her some slack and not say anything, you know, until – in
fact, I didn’t say anything . . . That’s why they have those big
double-doors there at MSNBC, you know, so they can get her fat ass in
makeup.

Posted by: beedubya at August 25, 2011 06:52 PM (AnTyA)

56 Heh. I just imagined C*ntessa, Sgt. Schultz, Madcow, Chrissy, and Larry O'Donnell, the draft-dodging draft-dodger who dodged the draft, all huddled together in a house on the beach on Long Island this weekend, with their supplies limited to booze, a hammer, and one roll of toilet paper strapped to the same tree with Geraldo.
Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:47 PM (UOM4

Small alteration.

Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 06:52 PM (/PFGQ)

57 Contessa Brewer, who has been a fixture on MSNBC since 2003, will no longer be an anchor on the network, TVNewser has learned.

Its sad when boobs sag.

Posted by: Guy Fawkes at August 25, 2011 06:52 PM (4nfy2)

58 53
Contessa Brewer, who has been a fixture on MSNBC ... Yeeeeah, but what kind of fixture?

A receptacle of some kind, I'm sure.

Posted by: wooga at August 25, 2011 06:53 PM (2p0e3)

59 C*ntessa can take her degree in Broadcast Journalism talking on tv and get a job anywhere!

Posted by: huerfano at August 25, 2011 06:53 PM (kD+se)

60 Whatever happened to Rick Sanchez?

Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:54 PM (UOM48)

61 what a worthless C*ntessa...

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 06:55 PM (2j/Mv)

62 Didn't they just ad Al Sharpton? Did they have some sort of moronic malconvergence? (I made up that word)

Posted by: kansas at August 25, 2011 06:55 PM (nNgbi)

63 Go ahead and laugh, I see a bright future for her in the Obama regime, maybe asst press secretary to the asst press secretary, something meaningful and appropriately public-interesty.

Posted by: Pooter Hound at August 25, 2011 06:55 PM (le5qc)

64 Whatever happened to Rick Sanchez?





Pretty sure I saw him manning my local Carl's Jr. drive thru.

"I said NO onion on my Famous Star, jackass."

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 25, 2011 06:55 PM (3AuGS)

65 Maybe she'll have time now to study for that degree in economics.

Posted by: Alex at August 25, 2011 06:55 PM (/yzYn)

66 Sad thing is.. MSLSD idiots whore themselves out for the liberal cause.. then when they get canned.. who the hell will hire them? They have lost all credibility that they could even pretend to be non biased.Who the hell is hiring this wind bag?
Posted by: Jumbo Jogging Shrimp tea party terrorist and Perry supporter at August 25, 2011 06:51 PM (qjUnn)

There's always NPR.

Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 06:56 PM (/PFGQ)

67 A receptacle of some kind, I'm sure.


Posted by: wooga at August 25, 2011 06:53 PM (2p0e3)

Contessa Brewer - CumDumpster Extraordinaire

Posted by: eastvalleyphx at August 25, 2011 06:56 PM (qiOph)

68 My favorite moment is when she scornfully asked that congressdude "oh so are you an economist??" much to her surprise, he has a phd in economics among other things

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fq607HQw26s

Posted by: Mark at August 25, 2011 06:56 PM (nAu6v)

69 Whatever happened to Rick Sanchez?

He's now the color voice of that college football powerhouse Florida International University.

...seriously

Posted by: beedubya at August 25, 2011 06:56 PM (AnTyA)

70 The only test she needs to pass is the pencil test. Maybe she failed.

Posted by: Pooter Hound at August 25, 2011 06:56 PM (le5qc)

71 @63

shit, she would pay good money just to lick Urkel's nine iron clean....

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 06:57 PM (2j/Mv)

72 C*ntessa can take her degree in Broadcast Journalism talking on tv and get a job anywhere!






I forsee a couch in her future......

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 25, 2011 06:57 PM (3AuGS)

73 69
Whatever happened to Rick Sanchez?He's now the color voice of that college football powerhouse Florida International University....seriously

heh

Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:57 PM (UOM48)

74 I'll bet all 17 viewers of her show will really miss her.

Posted by: Peregrine Took, a Hobbit on Janet Napolitano's Watch List at August 25, 2011 06:58 PM (mJznp)

75 That is my absolute favorite C*ntessa Brewer highlight clip of all time. Of all time. Also, my favorite Al Sharpton clip. As for Jesse Jackson, I prefer the one where he says he's going to cut off Barry's balls.

Posted by: huerfano at August 25, 2011 06:58 PM (kD+se)

76 MSNBC, we're going black, we don't need another white bitch/

Posted by: Al at August 25, 2011 06:58 PM (PZiww)

77 I forsee a couch in her future......

I'm hoping for a filthy mattress in the alley of a DC ghetto...and being paid in crack.

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 06:59 PM (2j/Mv)

78 74
I'll bet all 17 viewers of her show will really miss her.

Just the sober one.

Posted by: Tesla at August 25, 2011 06:59 PM (DPU1J)

79 That is the kind of reporting and commenting that keeps a moron coming back.

Posted by: dogfish at August 25, 2011 06:59 PM (N2yhW)

80 Who names their kid "Contessa" anyway? I blame her fuckin' parental units.

Posted by: Dr Phil at August 25, 2011 06:59 PM (8DdAv)

81 As for Jesse Jackson, I prefer the one where he says he's going to cut off Barry's balls.




Jesse doesn't have the guts to stick his hand in Michelle's pocket.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 25, 2011 07:00 PM (3AuGS)

82 This gives her more time to rent her mouth out to hobos.

For what? Mixing sterno and runoff water? Urination?

Posted by: George Orwell what knows Obama is a stuttering clusterfuck of a miserable failure at August 25, 2011 07:01 PM (AZGON)

83 The scrunt is still drawing a very generous salary I am sure.Along with Ed Schultz and Al Sharpton among others.There is no justice in this life.

Posted by: steevy at August 25, 2011 07:02 PM (pV6cO)

84 80
Who names their kid "Contessa" anyway? I blame her fuckin' parental units.

Posted by: Dr Phil at August 25, 2011 06:59 PM (8DdAv)
Leave my sister alone!

Posted by: Quisling Brewer at August 25, 2011 07:03 PM (UOM48)

85
That’s why they have those big double-doors there at MSNBC, you know, so they can get her fat ass in makeup.

It's true, it's true. She has the kind of ass you beat with a car antenna.

Posted by: Sean Bannion at August 25, 2011 07:03 PM (HUZDZ)

86 So if Contessa and Keef hooked up and had a kid, what would they name it?

Posted by: Faffner the Cat loves me some Rick Perry bitches at August 25, 2011 07:04 PM (8DdAv)

87 I think Irene is going to hit the Carolina coast, travel a bit inlandand then peter out to just rain.

Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 07:04 PM (/PFGQ)

88 Who names their kid "Contessa" anyway?

Worse yet, maybe she picked it herself as her stage name.

Posted by: Retread at August 25, 2011 07:04 PM (BO5ap)

89 Posted by: Quisling Brewer at August 25, 2011 07:03 PM (UOM4
elspeth? Is that you?

Posted by: Sean Bannion at August 25, 2011 07:04 PM (HUZDZ)

90 Contessa and Tommy Chong on Colbert...look it up...hilarious

Posted by: cvb at August 25, 2011 07:04 PM (Ud5ks)

91 So what did she do to lose her job?

Say something bad about obama or something nice about Perry?

Posted by: Deathknyte at August 25, 2011 07:05 PM (gqvHi)

92 Seriously, how wide is her ass? let's say, on the WASserman-Schultz Wide ASs Scale (the WASS WASS Scale, for short)
If the congresswoman is a ten, and SecState is about an eightpointfive, where does Contessa rank?
Yo noon anchorwoman ass so fat---

Posted by: Pooter Hound at August 25, 2011 07:06 PM (le5qc)

93 Criminy. You get caught making a really stupid error on national TV, and then you try to excuse it by pointing out that you are just a mannequin who reads whatever is put in front of you? Unbelievable.

Posted by: pep at August 25, 2011 07:06 PM (6TB1Z)

94 That's right Contessa; This is what happens when you aren't smart enough to actually comment on the news and your looks fade such that the camera men can't stand to keep you in frame: you're kind of useless. Back to the pit with the rest of the wannabees.

Posted by: MikeTheMoose Camellia Sinensis Operative at August 25, 2011 07:07 PM (0q2P7)

95 Can't find the clip of her dancing on the show

Sweet Fancy Moses!

Posted by: kbdabear at August 25, 2011 07:08 PM (Y+DPZ)

96 Turns out she's not a real Contessa, either.

Posted by: Trimegistus at August 25, 2011 07:08 PM (5/200)

97 Good news everybody. I have a new gig as the WH Press Secretary.

Posted by: C*ntessa at August 25, 2011 07:08 PM (N2yhW)

98
So Rosie O'Donnell, Michelle Obama, and Contessa Brewer walk into a Weight Watchers meeting...

Posted by: Fish the Impaler at August 25, 2011 07:10 PM (Lt/Za)

99 Criminy. You get caught making a really stupid error on national TV, and then you try to excuse it by pointing out that you are just a mannequin who reads whatever is put in front of you? Unbelievable.
Posted by: pep at August 25, 2011 07:06 PM (6TB1Z)

It's a feature, not a bug. Does SCOAMF mean anything to you?

Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 07:11 PM (/PFGQ)

100 86
So if Contessa and Keef hooked up and had a kid, what would they name it?

Barack

Posted by: Peregrine Took, a Hobbit on Janet Napolitano's Watch List at August 25, 2011 07:11 PM (mJznp)

101 So if Contessa and Keef hooked up and had a kid, what would they name it?

And if it was a girl - Barack

Posted by: Peregrine Took, a Hobbit on Janet Napolitano's Watch List at August 25, 2011 07:12 PM (mJznp)

102 So if Contessa and Keef hooked up and had a kid, what would they name it?
Cueef

Posted by: Sean Bannion at August 25, 2011 07:12 PM (HUZDZ)

103 I've had luggage with more personality than her...was probably smarter, too.

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 07:13 PM (2j/Mv)

104 And RIGHT before I read this about Contessa, I see this clip of Chris Jansing

http://is.gd/gA8jiE

Seems she is stepping right into Contessa's shoes. She takes a Perry statement and completely misrepresents it -EVEN showing the whole statement to be not at all the way she interprets it.

Posted by: Less at August 25, 2011 07:15 PM (PGXeZ)

105 So Rosie O'Donnell, Michelle Obama, and Contessa Brewer walk into a Weight Watchers meeting...
So Rosie O'Donnell, Michelle Obama, and Contessa Brewer walk into an all-you-can-eat buffet Weight Watchers meeting...

Posted by: Peregrine Took, a Hobbit on Janet Napolitano's Watch List at August 25, 2011 07:15 PM (mJznp)

106
I've had luggage with more personality than her...was probably smarter, too.





Not to mention, better skin.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 25, 2011 07:15 PM (3AuGS)

107 Maybe they let her go so she has the opportunity to join the ratings juggernaut that is Keith Olbermann's network.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at August 25, 2011 07:16 PM (SY2Kh)

108 A certain Ewok hardest hit. That piece on her was Bardian in its brilliance.
Now they need to get rid of that Rachel Maddow fella.

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at August 25, 2011 07:17 PM (d0Tfm)

109 So Rosie O'Donnell, Michelle Obama, and Contessa Brewer walk into a Weight Watchers meeting...
So Rosie O'Donnell, Michelle Obama, and Contessa Brewer walk into an all-you-can-eat buffet Weight Watchers meeting...

Posted by: Peregrine Took, a Hobbit on Janet Napolitano's Watch List at August 25, 2011 07:15 PM (mJznp)




I think I've seen that movie.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 25, 2011 07:17 PM (3AuGS)

110 FNC saying that Dick is finalizing his jobs proposal. He must have scribbled it down on the back of his golf scorecard.

Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 07:18 PM (/PFGQ)

111 So Rosie O'Donnell, Michelle Obama, and Contessa Brewer walk into an all-you-can-eat buffet are trapped in an elevator with only one bag of Krispy Kremes....

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 07:19 PM (2j/Mv)

112 re comment 111

the ultimate cage match!


My money is on Moochelle...cuz of those toned arms!

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 07:20 PM (2j/Mv)

113 I think daddy can pull some strings and get his little meggy the job...for continuity

Posted by: dananjcon at August 25, 2011 07:20 PM (q1Tbv)

114 c*ntinuity of FAIL

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 07:21 PM (2j/Mv)

115 I think daddy can pull some strings and get his little meggy the job...for continuity
Posted by: dananjcon at August 25, 2011 07:20 PM (q1Tbv)

H8ter!!

Posted by: Soona - Tearorrist at August 25, 2011 07:23 PM (/PFGQ)

116 Oops, right...cuntinuity.

Posted by: dananjcon at August 25, 2011 07:23 PM (q1Tbv)

117 Chris Jansing steps up to continue the noble journalistic traditions of being stupid and making shit up.

Posted by: AMartel at August 25, 2011 07:27 PM (1Bqk7)

118 Liberals are dunces guided by hate of those who thwart their egotistical impulses and question their ignorant assumptions.

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 07:30 PM (2j/Mv)

119 Hmmmm, didn't she used to be on Strangers with Candy?

Posted by: Faffner the Cat loves me some Rick Perry bitches at August 25, 2011 07:30 PM (8DdAv)

120 The only test she needs to pass is the pencil test. Maybe she failed.
I think it was a urine bath you're referring to.

Posted by: Faffner the Cat loves me some Rick Perry bitches at August 25, 2011 07:33 PM (8DdAv)

121 You should see her play rock, paper, scissors.

Posted by: Crusty the Clown at August 25, 2011 07:36 PM (8DdAv)

122 @117

As well as blaming others when such is pointed out.

Posted by: model_1066 at August 25, 2011 07:36 PM (2j/Mv)

123
Whatever happened to Rick Sanchez?

Posted by: Jane D'oh at August 25, 2011 06:54 PM

He was being considered for a couple of anchor jobs in L.A. and bombed out on both.

Posted by: arhooley at August 25, 2011 07:43 PM (3n2lK)

124 She is one of the dumbest, most blatantly biased gutterscrunts on MSNBC; she's basically Ed Schultz with a smaller rack.

She will be missed.


Ace. That there's funny. Somebody has to e-mail that to her.

Posted by: observer at August 25, 2011 07:46 PM (GAP2O)

125 But she's still a dirty dirty whore, yes?

Posted by: toby928™ at August 25, 2011 07:53 PM (GTbGH)

126 98
So Rosie O'Donnell, Michelle Obama, and Contessa Brewer walk into a Weight Watchers meeting...
Posted by: Fish the Impaler at August 25, 2011 07:10 PM (Lt/Za)

... on Guam. The island capsizes. They perish. The End.

Happy endings always bring a tear to my eye (* sniff! *)

Posted by: No Whining at August 25, 2011 07:59 PM (HVDho)

127
If I were a liberal and she were conservative, this would be the point in time where I express to all of you my rape fantasy of contessa for the next fifteen minutes.

Posted by: NMS at August 25, 2011 08:05 PM (pcdjz)

128 But alas, my head is not pointy enough.

Posted by: NMS at August 25, 2011 08:08 PM (zt3lR)

129 Not fair to compare breasts to moobs. Moobs are much easier to grow and sag a whole lot more. I wouldn't know from experience, as I have pectoral muscles, but from what I've seen....

Posted by: SFGoth at August 25, 2011 08:11 PM (dZ756)

130 In Rick Perry's America, she can always get a job in any major oil patch!

Posted by: Ducatisti at August 25, 2011 08:14 PM (KYE7u)

131 How about a "Caught" episode from Contessa revealing the devastating incident from her childhood that turned her into a contemptible, bitter, asexual c*nt who chose journalism as a career so she could tell her story..........without really telling it.

Posted by: Sock Pro at August 25, 2011 08:26 PM (4t9J5)

132 Latex catsuit anyone?

Posted by: torabora at August 25, 2011 08:30 PM (8uwoq)

133 Standard sexist fare from you conservatives.

Posted by: Jon Huntsman at August 25, 2011 08:34 PM (ApIyR)

134 When you think about it...FNC has a pretty high level of eye candy amongst its pundits and anchorettes. Not only great looking but many of them have J.D.'s for whatever that's worth. Blondes, brunettes, redheads, etc.

Contessa Brewer represented the highest level of hotness that MSNBC is capable of providing, and without her, the average hotness plummets to negligible. With Rachel Maddow bringing up the rear.

Posted by: sunny black at August 25, 2011 08:38 PM (0dyYY)

135 With Rachel Maddow bringing banging Lawrence O'Donnell up the rear with Charlie Brown's dildo.

Posted by: RickZ at August 25, 2011 08:53 PM (SLo0H)

136 Here's Judd Gregg ripping into Brewer... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dIPWbENVEZY&NR=1

Posted by: Genetic Tunder at August 25, 2011 08:57 PM (dbYHP)

137 Wasn't it Ace who said that Brewer had had more sweaty, greasy men inside her than the kitchen at a Waffle House?

Posted by: tmi3rd at August 25, 2011 09:13 PM (WRtsc)

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Posted by: dbqv4ct at August 25, 2011 09:15 PM (w/9M2)

139 I have been quite impressive with your posts, keep up the great work.

Posted by: Watership Down AudioBook at August 25, 2011 09:25 PM (z3/Dt)

140 She left WTMJ (Milwaukee) due to a botched oral surgery, moved to KLIT in SF where she came to the attention of Ms. Madcow and finished her regional market experience at WSTD, where the entire staff mysteriously contracted genital wartz. Go figger.

Posted by: Brazofuerte at August 25, 2011 11:02 PM (c6PHY)

141 I went to undergrad with Contessa. I don't like her politics, and never did. We used to engage insome debates, complete with undergraduate-level ad hominems, back in the day. Ieven teased her once about her figure, which I now think was pretty juvenile. And I laughed at her when she stepped in it interviewing Rep. Brooks a few weeks ago. Nevertheless, one thing I try to remember on the internet is not to say something I wouldn't say to someone's face. I'm just sayin'...

Posted by: Tanker J.D. at August 25, 2011 11:19 PM (8b126)

142 comment 32 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Norah_O%27Donnell

Posted by: fbaker at August 25, 2011 11:35 PM (ySLSS)

Posted by: fbaker at August 25, 2011 11:35 PM (ySLSS)

144 When I first heard her name mentioned in connection with MSNBC, I had to pause and think for a few seconds...her name sure sounded familiar, but I couldn't picture her. Then I googled her, and found out she had been with WTMJ, a local station.It is a station I never watch, but other Milwaukee cons I knowwho did watch onoccasiontold me they were not aware of Contessa's lefty leanings. They were not aware of her personalityat all,really. It wasn't til she got to MSNBC thatshe was able to really let her freakflag fly.

Posted by: Donna V. at August 26, 2011 12:08 AM (lb6Bt)

145 Is she, like, a real Contessa?

Posted by: Running Hobo at August 26, 2011 12:10 AM (l1oyw)

146 "Nevertheless, one thing I try to remember on the internet is not to say something I wouldn't say to someone's face."

How about never tweet a picture of something I wouldn't wave in their face?

Posted by: Anthony Weiner at August 26, 2011 12:10 AM (NZMKc)

147 And to forget someone with a first name like "Contessa" tells you howcompletely forgettablethis dull scrunt is.

Posted by: Donna V. at August 26, 2011 12:11 AM (lb6Bt)

148 "Is she, like, a real Contessa?"

Yeah, she's one of your socialists named after aristocrats. (Who, secretly, see themselves as aristos. Really, do you think Contessa considers herself misnamed? No, she undoubtably believes she is like an actual contessa ministering to the dumb serfs.)
Not suprising to me that educatedleft-wingers see themselves in such a flattering light. There are more than a few *laugh* "blue collar" Dem voters willing to grovel in front of the Obamabots. Really, honestly, I still know ancient Dem voters who convinced themselves 50 years ago that the Dems are for "the common man."
Their delusions are so deep, nothing will rescue them.

Posted by: Donna V. at August 26, 2011 12:23 AM (lb6Bt)

149 'Tessa....we hardly knew ye! So who gets the slot......
any "ho" dat de Rev decides? He be de top monkey
since Olbermann done crashed and burned.

Posted by: grizzlybare at August 26, 2011 03:24 AM (4V89N)

150 Chris Jansing looks pretty damn good for 54. That said, she's still a gutterscrunt.

Posted by: Keef and Rachel at August 26, 2011 10:24 AM (Xv7f/)

151 An Ace Clasic that I saved:
As I have noted with footnotes and authoritative citations previously, Contessa Brewer is a dirty, lying, pus-mouthed whore.
A cheap, sore-riddled nasty bit of gutterscrunge who'll rent you her mouth for the change in your pocket. A tawdry wallow-trollop oozing with syphilitic fester who raises her filthy skirts at the scent of crack-smoke. A disease-dripping pincushion, the media's vile mattress of last resort, a pathogen in garish vinyl high heels, a loose-toothed croup-breathed night crawler reeking of bathtub gin, fungicide, and the genetic stink of human desperation.
A skanky bit of mung-trash sloughing off diseased skin like a leprous snake. (A leprous snake who whores out her verminous cloaca for two bits a pop, I mean.)
This sad clown of a whore, oozing with foul custard and slack and sloppy as an over-used trash bag, is too stupid to know how to lie judiciously, and so lies promiscuously and wantonly, demonstrating all the discretion she once showed in junior high when her nickname was "Automatic" Brewer.
By the way: No, I don't think Contessa Brewer really "did" this. She's too stupid. She doesn't have that kind of responsibility. Her job is to wear a wonderbra, eat rice pudding with a "safety spoon," blow the line producer, and read the phonetically-spelled questions someone else writes for her.
Some pale fat loser in the producer chair did it. But I don't know that porky nobody's name, and Contessa Brewer knew what was being done here, so the hell with Typhoid Brewer.

Posted by: PaulC at August 26, 2011 10:38 AM (F26eZ)

152 I'm just asking--did Contessa lose her slot to Al Sharpton? I mean jeez Louise, getting cut from the squad (well after the Brooks "did you study economics" fiasco, maybe she had it coming) to make room for Reverend Al has to hurt.

Posted by: Comanche Voter at August 26, 2011 10:41 AM (3ESDJ)

153 This is how the slide begins. First, you lose your gig on MSNBC. Then, you feel your spinal cord gripped by the icy hand of reality when some secretary to an assistant producer in Biloxi tells you he got your last four messages and she's sure he'll call when he has time. Next, you're doing informercials for a window replacement company in Tonawanda. Finally, gonzo sex videos where some guy who won an on-line contest to have sex with a "celebrity" is slapping you in the face with his ... you know .... I'm telling you. It can happen.

Posted by: Rocco at August 26, 2011 10:41 AM (Xv7f/)

154 But she's still a dirty dirty whore, yes?

...she's basically Ed Schultz with a smaller rack.

...where the entire staff mysteriously contracted genital wartz.

Seriously, how wide is her ass?

This gives her more time to rent her mouth out to hobos.

oooh, and so much more!


Wow, this must be a misogynist convention. Bet dollars to donuts every single one of these posters wears the pants in their relationships...and claims to be a good little churchgoer to boot!



Posted by: antineocon at August 26, 2011 05:20 PM (PtLXD)

155 pretends to wear the pants...oops! My anger got the best of me.

Posted by: antineocon at August 26, 2011 05:22 PM (PtLXD)

156 What a load of BS from u hater losers. She was and IS the best thing MSNBC has to offer. Who there is more interesting than her? Matthews? Schultz? Tameron Hall? Like no other anchor got someone's name wrong on air and b/c it's your hero Jesse Jackson, you will never forget it?

If u hate Contessa, then I guess your idea of "interesting" news is the monumental dullard Scarborough. Luckily, Contessa never dumbed down her broadcasts to ur levels.........enjoy all the other MSNBC anchors that u think are sooo much better losers. Guess you would rather watch Al Sharpton instead. MSNBC proves yet again they cannot utilize true talent to save their lives. Contessa was always too good for them.

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Posted by: lusefer at August 26, 2011 09:07 PM (B0Yzx)

158 I think we have a job for her. It involves the phrase,"Would you like fries with that?"

Posted by: Cuntessa's job councillor at August 26, 2011 11:05 PM (fQYHU)






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