Mission Creeps: EPA Decides That Because Milk Contains Oil, Its Authority To Control "Oil Spills" Now Gives It Authority To Check On Farmers' Emergency Management Plans For Milk Spills

This is actually sort of useful, as it's a good demonstration of why agencies need to be sharply limited and checked.

Which is important, as Senator Barosso is introducing a bill to ban all federal agencies from regulating greehouse gases.

Posted by: Ace at 12:32 PM



Comments

1 One of those cuts that needs to be made first? Yeah, I think the EPA qualifies.

Posted by: unknown jane at February 02, 2011 12:33 PM (5/yRG)

2 First.

Posted by: Tattoo De Plane at February 02, 2011 12:33 PM (mHQ7T)

3 Milk products give me the wind something fierce. BTW, if the dicklessEPA misspells "Spils" in their press release, does that invalidate it?

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at February 02, 2011 12:35 PM (DPM1U)

4 Wait until the EPA figures out that just about everything in the modern world has oil in it ... The chances of this happening are slim, since libtards never quite understood what petro-chemical meant.

BTW, stock up on olives, now.

Posted by: iknowtheleft at February 02, 2011 12:35 PM (N49h9)

5 If the EPA recognized the dangerous levels of anti-Constitutionalism and outright treason in Washington, and moved to regulate them, I'd be all about lovin' me some EPA.

As it is, this is another step in the Mohammedan Mouthpiece's (ours, that is) plan to turn us into another Egypt. Or worse.

Learn to say "Obamahu Akbar," people.

Posted by: MrScribbler© at February 02, 2011 12:35 PM (Ulu3i)

6 Release the lolcats.

Posted by: Editor at February 02, 2011 12:36 PM (Zs83Q)

7 Well look what happened to the Gulf when Republicans were left in charge.

Posted by: Kelly at February 02, 2011 12:36 PM (58iGH)

8 Nobody tell the EPA about oil in peanuts.

Posted by: Your friendly neighborhood elephants at February 02, 2011 12:38 PM (3YYhR)

9 Do we need emergency spill response management plans for when we dookie, now? I'm way behind on that.

Posted by: Editor at February 02, 2011 12:39 PM (Zs83Q)

10 After N iterations of this logic, the EPA will arrive at, "Used Stridex medicated pads contain oils, ergo, we want to examine each household's 20 page plan for dealing with disposal of Stridex medicated pads."

Some serious reductions in the EPA's budget are in order. Do you hear that, Republican members of the House?

Posted by: ya2daup at February 02, 2011 12:39 PM (Wqfrr)

11 I thought this had to be misreported or a joke.



Maybe the Egyptians are on to something.

Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 12:39 PM (AZGON)

12 Federal Agencies should not be allowed to legislate. If they have a question about the limits of their authority, they should ask Congress to grant it explicitly. No "rule making".

Posted by: KG at February 02, 2011 12:39 PM (2k/Dg)

13 7 Don't you have a protest that needs your attendance right now?

Posted by: unknown jane at February 02, 2011 12:39 PM (5/yRG)

14 Are the first responders the kittehs?

Posted by: Mb at February 02, 2011 12:40 PM (Fr8N6)

15 He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people and eat out their substance.

Posted by: Things Jefferson Said, Vol. I at February 02, 2011 12:41 PM (Wqfrr)

16 Actually, this is useful. The EPA is the poster child for leftard government. They are paving the way to their own demise. If we can elect a Republican who has the actual balls to do away with their useless asses.

Posted by: maddogg at February 02, 2011 12:41 PM (OlN4e)

17 Oil in milk? We just struck gold! Let's refine the excess dairy produced by farm subsidies into fine, fine biodiesel! Energy shortages solved!

Casein... fuel of the future!

Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 12:42 PM (AZGON)

18 Spilt milk? First, kill all the lawyers. There is no second step.

Posted by: Wm. Shakespeare at February 02, 2011 12:42 PM (FcR7P)

19 People with oily skin had better watch out!

Posted by: iknowtheleft at February 02, 2011 12:42 PM (N49h9)

20 @15

Take this to the power of ten.

Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 12:42 PM (AZGON)

21
Casein... fuel of the future!

Casein is a protein, not an oil, but your point is still well-taken, .

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at February 02, 2011 12:43 PM (9hSKh)

22 Great. Conspiracy by M'chelle to make all milk go skim.

Posted by: dagny at February 02, 2011 12:43 PM (ZuJDg)

23 Kelly
You should let the teacher know that computer use should be supervised in Special Ed.

Posted by: maddogg at February 02, 2011 12:43 PM (OlN4e)

24 Actually, this is useful. The EPA is the poster
child for leftard government. They are paving the way to their own
demise. If we can elect a Republican who has the actual balls to do away
with their useless asses.

Posted by: maddogg at February 02, 2011 12:41 PM (OlN4e)
And just like that, maddogg's plan took a sudden wrong turn.

Posted by: Editor at February 02, 2011 12:43 PM (Zs83Q)

25 Well look what happened to the Gulf when Republicans were left in charge.
Posted by: Kelly at February 02, 2011 12:36 PM (58iGH)
I could have sworn Obama and the Democrats were in charge when the spill happened. Of course, Obama is so weak he never seems in charge anyway.
Look what's happened to the price of gas and jobs in the areasince Obama shut down the Gulf drilling.

Posted by: B. Hussein Obama at February 02, 2011 12:43 PM (1ZoJ8)

26 People with oily skin had better watch out!

Posted by: iknowtheleft at February 02, 2011 12:42 PM (N49h9)
Nobody took me seriously, but look at all you now. I told you people made great fuel.

Posted by: Adolph Hitler at February 02, 2011 12:44 PM (Zs83Q)

27 great, now the EPA is gonna regulate Pizza Hut

Posted by: dudeinsantacruz at February 02, 2011 12:45 PM (FcnYT)

28 @21
Yeah, I know... used it for effect. Actually casein paint used to be a fantastic medium for the arts, but it's sort of outmoded today.

But just think... your Chevy Volt running on Monterey Jack!

Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 12:45 PM (AZGON)

29 We need a moratorium on drilling for milk, STAT!

Posted by: EPA(Economic Prohibition Agency) at February 02, 2011 12:45 PM (J74Py)

30 This article is 'Exhibit A' of why we need to starve the beast. Take spending back to 1998 funding levels -- the lefties all think that the Clinton years were the greatest. Give them a second round.

Posted by: Downsized Upscale at February 02, 2011 12:45 PM (IhHdM)

31 Milk stations instead of gas stations, works for me!

Posted by: 'Nam Grunt at February 02, 2011 12:45 PM (ivCSJ)

32 Kelly's friends wash up in the gulf.

Posted by: dagny at February 02, 2011 12:45 PM (ZuJDg)

33 So, are acne-prone teenagers now considered toxic spill zones?

Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 12:46 PM (AZGON)

34 I'll take a tall glass of 2%.

Posted by: Valerie Jarret at February 02, 2011 12:47 PM (3lx5O)

35 When the EPA tries to regulate McDonald's because of the cooking oil, expect a turf war with the FDA.

Posted by: Bevel Lemelisk at February 02, 2011 12:47 PM (oNQkO)

36 We will oppose drilling on the American National Dairy Reserve with every fiber of our being.

Posted by: The Sierra Club Cheese Log at February 02, 2011 12:48 PM (AZGON)

37 24And just like that, maddogg's plan took a sudden wrong turn.Posted by: Editor at February 02, 2011 12:43 PM (Zs83Q)

Oh, noes! Have we looped back to slurpees and cars in ditches fables?

Posted by: Slurptards at February 02, 2011 12:48 PM (Wqfrr)

38 if you drive a car - I’ll tax the street;

if you try to sit- I’ll tax your seat;

if you get too cold - I’ll tax the heat;

if you take a walk - I'll tax your feet.

Posted by: The Taxman at February 02, 2011 12:48 PM (FUozQ)

39 Not long before those pervs try to regulate breast milk.

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at February 02, 2011 12:49 PM (DPM1U)

40 I feel like I have a target on my forehead.

Posted by: Crisco at February 02, 2011 12:50 PM (AZGON)

41 Anyone else think this is a dodge to make day care centers eligible for "Superfund" status?

Posted by: Brandon In Baton Rouge at February 02, 2011 12:50 PM (iBaup)

42 Fill it up with 18%!

Posted by: EPA fuckwad pulls up to a cow at February 02, 2011 12:50 PM (3YYhR)

43 Not long before those pervs try to regulate breast milk.
This is the hill to die on, men!

Posted by: dudeinsantacruz at February 02, 2011 12:51 PM (FcnYT)

44 So where do I apply to work on the porn sets where they squirt breast milk?

Posted by: Uncle Pervy at February 02, 2011 12:51 PM (Fr8N6)

45 7 Well look what happened to the Gulf when Republicans were left in charge.
Posted by: Kelly at February 02, 2011 12:36 PM (58iGH)
Okay, who is it? Some moron/mornette is pulling a fast one on us. There cannot be anyone this stupid and still be capable of breathing.
Kelly, if you are real, which I doubt, I must point out that Obama was in charge before, during and after the BP oil spill. His administration was in charge, got it? If the rules weren't being followed by BP, it's Obama'sfault for notenforcing it. If damage control was ineffective, it's his fault for not using resources properly (fire booms, allowing foreign ships to operate), itc.
You cannot bein charge but then say, "it's not my fault."
The first rule of leadership:"Everything isyour fault."
(It's strange that truth comes from a Disney film...)

Posted by: Warthog at February 02, 2011 12:51 PM (WDySP)

46 10 After N iterations of this logic, the EPA will arrive at, "Used Stridex medicated pads contain oils, ergo, we want to examine each household's 20 page plan for dealing with disposal of Stridex medicated pads."Some serious reductions in the EPA's budget are in order. Do you hear that, Republican members of the House?
Posted by: ya2daup at February 02, 2011 12:39 PM (Wqfrr)
But because we LIKE Curly light bulbs... the REAL danger of Mecury contamination of dumps? No worries...

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 02, 2011 12:51 PM (AdK6a)

47 has there ever even been a catastrophic milk spill?

Posted by: dudeinsantacruz at February 02, 2011 12:52 PM (FcnYT)

48 33
So, are acne-prone teenagers now considered toxic spill zones?Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 12:46 PM (AZGON)

Perhaps it would be a good thing for them to experience the benevolent hand of gubmint regulation for being excessively oily ... maybe then they'd be less prone to drinking the kool-aid and going all in for libtard governance come election time.

Posted by: Slurptards at February 02, 2011 12:52 PM (Wqfrr)

49
Well look what happened to the Gulf when Republicans were left in charge.

Good grief ..... where to start.

Aside from being being factually incorrect about who was in power at the time of the spill, that argument isn't even germaine to the discussion. Additionally, neither party gets "left" in charge.... in this country we have.....

....
....

what am I doing here??? Trying to have an honest give and take with a troll.

My bad.

Posted by: fixerupper at February 02, 2011 12:52 PM (rw9qQ)

50 Sometimes I get pretty oily, but I get a waiver. I came from the right neighborhood.

Posted by: Hummus at February 02, 2011 12:52 PM (AZGON)

51 ...and eat out their substance.
My favourite Jefferson Quote.

Posted by: Rachel Maddow at February 02, 2011 12:53 PM (22GlG)

52 7
Well look what happened to the Gulf when Republicans were left in charge.

Posted by: Kelly at February 02, 2011 12:36 PM (58iGH)

Are you saying that you actually dislike clean water and prefer oil spills?

Posted by: blindside at February 02, 2011 12:53 PM (x7g7t)

53 My vanilla milkshakes will never be enjoyed the same way now.

Posted by: 'Nam Grunt at February 02, 2011 12:54 PM (ivCSJ)

54 Where does this put me?

Posted by: Al Gore, Purveyor of the Finest Snake Oil at February 02, 2011 12:54 PM (FcnYT)

55 35
When the EPA tries to regulate McDonald's because of the cooking oil, expect a turf war with the FDA.

Its a pity both sides can't lose.

Posted by: Kratos (Channeling Henry Kissinger) at February 02, 2011 12:55 PM (9hSKh)

56 My vanilla milkshakes will never be enjoyed the same way now.

Racist!

Posted by: can't let go of old memes at February 02, 2011 12:55 PM (GTbGH)

57 Well look what happened to the Gulf when Republicans were left in charge.
Posted by: Kelly
Seems a little OT, buy were you referring to when the Republicans threw the Iraqis out of Kuwait or when they deposed Saddam Hussein?
Gulf I or Gulf II?

Posted by: Speller at February 02, 2011 12:55 PM (J74Py)

58 Do we need emergency spill response management plans for when we dookie, now?

But dropping a CFL and releasing the mercury, that's cool.

Posted by: HeatherRadish at February 02, 2011 12:55 PM (TUpD9)

59 We will Win the Future with High-Speed, spill proof, Cow Rail!

Posted by: Barack al Aqsa Obama at February 02, 2011 12:55 PM (22GlG)

60 what am I doing here??? Trying to have an honest give and take with a troll. My bad. Posted by: fixerupper at February 02, 2011 12:52 PM (rw9qQ)
I hit "Post" before I realized that so you are swifter than me.

Posted by: Warthog at February 02, 2011 12:56 PM (WDySP)

61 45Okay, who is it? Some moron/mornette is pulling a
fast one on us. There cannot be anyone this stupid and still be capable
of breathing.Posted by: Warthog at February 02, 2011 12:51 PM (WDySP)

If it's her, her tag keeps changing. Irrespective of that, yes, she is that dumb.

Posted by: ya2daup at February 02, 2011 12:56 PM (Wqfrr)

62 I dairy farmed for years. and the government has always controlled this stuff. They check your milk before you ship it, they check your equipment, your cows, your manure handling system. This kind of stuff has been going on in dairy farms for years. Used to they checked the milk spills etc just to get past the health inspector so that you could keep your grade a permit.

People are just so far removed from agriculture anymore that they have no idea what goes on in farming. They don't even know what it takes to get the permits to milk cows.

Posted by: Terrye at February 02, 2011 12:56 PM (SkhDW)

63 By the end of O-retards term, thegovernment will be regulatingGranny's ass suave. These fucks need to GO AWAY. Right away.

Posted by: maddogg at February 02, 2011 12:56 PM (OlN4e)

64 Speaking of McDonald's, Shamrock Shake season is upon us! That's my milk consumption for the entire year--not for nothing it coincides with spring and the warming of the earth. Shamrock Shake, thou art Persephone!

Posted by: Big Fat Meanie at February 02, 2011 12:57 PM (DPM1U)

65 People are just so far removed from agriculture anymore that they have no idea what goes on in farming.
But they sure complain about the noise, the smells, and dust when they build a new house out in the country next to existing farms.

Posted by: HeatherRadish at February 02, 2011 12:57 PM (TUpD9)

66 Look on the bright side -this'll create a whole new marketfor Hazmat suits and specialized cleaning kits to be suppliedto parents of messy toddlers.

Posted by: BlueStateSil at February 02, 2011 12:58 PM (DHcNZ)

67 New Iowahawk. Barak's school menus.http://bit.ly/fv28Fx

Posted by: dagny at February 02, 2011 12:58 PM (ZuJDg)

68 We're crying over spilt milk here.

Posted by: EPA(Economic Prohibition Agency) at February 02, 2011 12:58 PM (J74Py)

69 mmmm, butter fat.

Posted by: huerfano at February 02, 2011 12:59 PM (QgmBR)

70 People are just so far removed from agriculture anymore that they have no idea what goes on in farming. They don't even know what it takes to get the permits to milk cows.

I guarantee you it's easier for an illegal in Clownifornia to get a driver's license than it is to legally milk a cow.

Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 01:00 PM (AZGON)

71 My children are half sicilian. Is this going to be a problem for me?

Posted by: dagny at February 02, 2011 01:00 PM (ZuJDg)

72 47 has there ever even been a catastrophic milk spill?Posted by: dudeinsantacruz at February 02, 2011 12:52 PM (FcnYT)

And with this simple cue, every 'Ron recovers innumerable repressed memories from their infant years of the mammary wells running dry ...

Posted by: ya2daup at February 02, 2011 01:00 PM (Wqfrr)

73 Jheri Curl wearers, Hardest Hit.

Posted by: garrett at February 02, 2011 01:00 PM (3lx5O)

74 If you think that's dumb, I'm just warming up. I got stoopid I haven't even used yet. (the EPA doesn't regulate stoopid does it?)

Posted by: The Amoeba who thinks for Kelly at February 02, 2011 01:01 PM (OlN4e)

75 Man, I use to love those California cheese commercials. They had cows doing the Flashdance shower scence.

Posted by: moi at February 02, 2011 01:02 PM (Ez4Ql)

76 (the EPA doesn't regulate stoopid does it?)
We're trying to corner the market. After that we get royalties.

Posted by: EPA(Economic Prohibition Agency) at February 02, 2011 01:03 PM (J74Py)

77 I made homemade waffles this morning w/fresh blueberries and used REAL butter and a big glass of cold milk to wash them down, bacon crisps too, do I have to report this to that fatassed 1st lady?

Posted by: 'Nam Grunt at February 02, 2011 01:03 PM (ivCSJ)

78 Its a pity both sides can't lose.

Posted by: Kratos (Channeling Henry Kissinger) at February 02, 2011 12:55 PM (9hSKh)
Ref. Afghanistan vs. Soviet Union.
I believe there is precedence.

Posted by: Editor at February 02, 2011 01:04 PM (Zs83Q)

79 I guarantee you it's easier for an illegal in Clownifornia to get a driver's license than it is to legally milk a cow.
I don't think anyone would argue against that.
But quenstion: is it easier to milk a cow or to deport illegal aliens?

Posted by: dudeinsantacruz at February 02, 2011 01:04 PM (FcnYT)

80 Does this mean that cows aren't content?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at February 02, 2011 01:04 PM (b6qrg)

81 75
Man, I use to love those California cheese commercials. They had cows doing the Flashdance shower scence.

Those commercials have to stop! They are promoting a dangerous, toxic chemical!

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at February 02, 2011 01:04 PM (9hSKh)

82 Last year, EPA amended the Spill Prevention Control and Countermeasure (SPCC) rule to strengthen certain provisions. Regulated facilities are required to amend and implement these changes as part of their overall SPCC plans. The purpose of the SPCC rule, which was finalized in 1973, is to establish requirements for facilities to prevent a discharge of oil into navigable waters or adjoining shorelines. EPA has no SPCC jurisdiction over drilling, production or workover facilities seaward of the coastline.

Types of facilities not eligible for the extension must comply by November 10, 2010:

Drilling, production or workover facilities that are offshore or that have an offshore component, or onshore facilities required to have and submit facility response plans (FRPs), due to the threats these facilities could pose of significant oil spills to navigable waters or adjoining shorelines.

Types of facilities eligible for the one year extension:

Onshore oil production, farms, electric utility plants, petroleum refining and related industries, chemical manufacturing, food manufacturing, manufacturing facilities using and storing animal fats and vegetable oils, metal and other manufacturing, real estate rental and leasing, retail trade, contract construction, wholesale trade, other commercial, transportation, arts entertainment recreation, other services (except public administration), petroleum bulk stations and terminals, education, hospitals other health care, accommodation and food services, fuel oil dealers, gasoline stations, information finance and insurance, mining, warehousing and storage, religious organizations, military installations, and government facilities.

EPA 10/08/2010


Broad and enduring mandate.....

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at February 02, 2011 01:05 PM (L8y7Q)

83 78
Its a pity both sides can't lose.

Posted by: Kratos (Channeling Henry Kissinger) at February 02, 2011 12:55 PM (9hSKh)
Ref. Afghanistan vs. Soviet Union.

I thought Henry was commenting on the Iraq/Iran war when he said that?

Posted by: Kratos (Ghost of Sparta) at February 02, 2011 01:05 PM (9hSKh)

84 "Fill 'er up with unleaded!"
"Moooooo!"

Posted by: Jay Guevara at February 02, 2011 01:05 PM (Ax8BU)

85 I made homemade waffles this morning w/fresh blueberries and used REAL butter and a big glass of cold milk to wash them down, bacon crisps too, do I have to report this to that fatassed 1st lady?
No need, it's already done.

Posted by: Google, Inc. at February 02, 2011 01:05 PM (FcnYT)

86 Seriously, we're going to see municipalities start requiring new and expensive recycling bins for cans of bacon grease. I'm not kidding.

Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 01:06 PM (AZGON)

87 Hypothetical: A high-speed train strikes a milk cow on the tracks.

(1) Which agency takes investigatory precedence: (a) the Transportation Safety Board, (b) the EPA, or (c) Freddie Silverman, Super Train Czar?

(2) Where do they bury the survivors?

Posted by: ya2daup at February 02, 2011 01:06 PM (Wqfrr)

88 Moo-Bar-ack Must Go!

Posted by: a Cow at February 02, 2011 01:06 PM (3lx5O)

89 This is a stretch only a schizophrenic can appreciate.
Back to you, Nancy...

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at February 02, 2011 01:06 PM (b6qrg)

90 Wasn't making reference to Henry's quote. I was referencing precedence.

Posted by: Editor at February 02, 2011 01:07 PM (Zs83Q)

91 The EPA is the poster child for leftard government.

The only EPA representative most people can name is Peck, the *ahem* lacking guy from Ghostbusters. Sometimes I think Bill Murray is a closet conservative.

Posted by: pep at February 02, 2011 01:07 PM (P18+/)

92 So since I'm a pollutant when I exhale, can the EPA control every facet of my life. Oh wait...that's what they're working on.

Posted by: keninnorcal at February 02, 2011 01:08 PM (SDc54)

93 (2) Where do they bury the survivors?
With my help, there won't be any.

Posted by: ObamaCare at February 02, 2011 01:08 PM (FcnYT)

94 EPA 10/08/2010

Broad and enduring mandate.....

Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix

Folks, the legal groundwork has already been laid, over decades. The only thing between us and a Soviet-style authoritarianism is the reluctance of the ruling class to exercise the full extent of their power. That won't last forever.

Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 01:09 PM (AZGON)

95 87 Hypothetical: A high-speed train strikes a milk cow on the tracks.(1) Which agency takes investigatory precedence: (a) the Transportation Safety Board, (b) the EPA, or (c) Freddie Silverman, Super Train Czar?(2) Where do they bury the survivors?
Posted by: ya2daup at February 02, 2011 01:06 PM (Wqfrr)
FBI, turns out the cow was owned by a Moslem Farmer...

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 02, 2011 01:09 PM (AdK6a)

96 77
I made homemade waffles this morning w/fresh blueberries and used REAL
butter and a big glass of cold milk to wash them down, bacon crisps too,
do I have to report this to that fatassed 1st lady?Posted by: 'Nam Grunt at February 02, 2011 01:03 PM (ivCSJ)

No. But feel free to recover, wrap and mail to her the end product from this feast when it reappears a day or two (YMMV) from now. We need the business.

Posted by: USPS at February 02, 2011 01:10 PM (Wqfrr)

97 They'll have to pry my EVOO from my cold, dead, annoyingly perky hands!

Posted by: Rachael Ray at February 02, 2011 01:10 PM (DHcNZ)

98 I move to Impeach! All those in favor say Aye!

Posted by: Jimi at February 02, 2011 01:11 PM (SLttp)

99 I'm just drilling this camel for milk. Do I need to file a form?

Posted by: Achmed al-Egypt at February 02, 2011 01:11 PM (FcR7P)

100 My favorite EPA stupidity anecdote comes from Ft. Carson, CO.

If you spill a drop of oil in the motor pool, you have to dump "dry sweep" (which is kitty litter) on the spill, grind it in with your boots to soak it up, then sweep up and dispose of it in an EPA-approved container.

Leave a quarter-sized spill on the motor pool concrete - the EPA inspector will fine your unit thousands of dollars. Dollars that come out of the unit's operating budget. Dollars that go directly to the EPA.

Directly across the street from the motor pool are parking lots with thousands of parking spaces, each of which has a massive oil slick at its head. The EPA inspector doesn't give a shit, because there's no one party you can lay the finger on, ergo there's no party they can fine.

And that, my friends, is one of the many ways leftard agencies increase their funding - by stealing from the military. They don't give a fuck about oil spills. It's all about feathering their own nest.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 02, 2011 01:12 PM (MdmMg)

101 Somebody from the EPA sees a bottle of Baby Oil on the shelf at Target.
Hilarity ensues.

Posted by: Village Idiot's Apprentice at February 02, 2011 01:13 PM (N4kBd)

102 I move to Impeach! All those in favor say Aye!

Posted by: Jimi at February 02, 2011 01:11 PM (SLttp)
Aye.

Posted by: iknowtheleft at February 02, 2011 01:13 PM (N49h9)

103 EPA Decides That Because Milk Contains Oil, Its Authority To Control "Oil Spills" Now Gives It Authority To Check On Farmers' Emergency Management Plans For Milk Spills
Well punch me in the face and call me Anderson Cooper.
(h/t Surferdoc)

Posted by: rdbrewer at February 02, 2011 01:13 PM (HSJsW)

104 I'm serious when I say a movement needs to seriously start to impeach these cockholsters from any Gov. job they have or it's going to get terminal in this Country, or what's left of it!!!!

Posted by: 'Nam Grunt at February 02, 2011 01:13 PM (ivCSJ)

105 Broad and enduring mandate.....
Posted by: Laurie David's Cervix at February 02, 2011 01:05 PM (L8y7Q)
wow... and that reads as they have to DO a plan... they just get an extension of one year to do it in...
Crap.... I gotz a gas can in the garage, for the lawn mower... do I need to submit a spill plan?

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 02, 2011 01:14 PM (AdK6a)

106 Can I get a Waiver to boil Anderson Cooper in Camel Oil?

Posted by: an egyptian rioter at February 02, 2011 01:14 PM (3lx5O)

107 Has the EPA banned cows from farting yet?

Posted by: nerdygirl at February 02, 2011 01:15 PM (d9jgX)

108 77 Not yet, but you do have to invite the fam and I over for breakfast...somebody has to mind the quality control

Posted by: unknown jane at February 02, 2011 01:15 PM (5/yRG)

109 Because I think that those cow emissions are responsible for all that dam snow that I'm going to have to rake off my roof.

Posted by: nerdygirl at February 02, 2011 01:16 PM (d9jgX)

110 Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 02, 2011 01:12 PM (MdmMg)


It's so depressing. You sort of wonder if we're becoming so self-stifled and necrotic as a society that it won't take much to make the whole house of cards collapse.

BTW you ought to post more often, because you can bring the funny when you want.

Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 01:16 PM (AZGON)

111 Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 02, 2011 01:12 PM (MdmMg)
I ran a demolition crew in Newark, NJ. We spent more on 'Sweeping Compound' than I made onmost jobs.

Posted by: garrett at February 02, 2011 01:16 PM (3lx5O)

112 107
Has the EPA banned cows from farting yet?

Yes, they issued a fartwa.

Posted by: pep at February 02, 2011 01:17 PM (P18+/)

113 Emergency Management Plan

Step 1: Don't cry
Step 2: Kill all the lawyers
Step 3: Profit!

Posted by: X at February 02, 2011 01:18 PM (V6CZ8)

114 And this is why the Committee to Oversee Will Folks will be investigating the emergency sex preparations of all the attractive Republican governors from South Carolina.

However, I will not speak to the rumors that said governor's picture, Will Folks, and a bottle of baby oil had any sort of lewd interactions last night.

Posted by: Will Folks at February 02, 2011 01:18 PM (bgcml)

115 Management Plan for Milk Spills:

Kittens. Lots and Lots of kittens.

Posted by: Oldcat at February 02, 2011 01:18 PM (z1N6a)

116 FBI, turns out the cow was owned by a Moslem Farmer...
Uh oh. Over to divorce court, then.

Posted by: Jay Guevara at February 02, 2011 01:18 PM (Ax8BU)

117 Well, Al-Jism reports tear gas used.

Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 01:19 PM (AZGON)

118 Oops, wrong thread!

Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 01:19 PM (AZGON)

119 Shoot, I better create an emergency management plan for my face.

Posted by: JP at February 02, 2011 01:19 PM (dYR95)

120 A cow jumped over the moon once. Shouldn't NASA sign off on milk spill abatement?
Oh wait. NASA only gets involved if the cow is owned by a muslim with low self-esteem.

Posted by: Cicero at February 02, 2011 01:19 PM (QKKT0)

121 Why is everyone raking their roofs now? Did I miss something with that?

I have a friend (frenemy?) who works as a lawyer for the EPA. Just knowing her has made me hate the agency. They employ her fat lazy ass, that's enough for me.

One time she went off when this case she "personally worked on" was pardoned by GWB? The poor farmer dude with some kind of dead rare animal thing? She was spitting nails. I said something like "Wait, what did he do again? Did he kill someone? Pollute? No? He poisoned a rat, and a bird ate the rat? He should be in jail for THAT?"

If only her head could actually explode from hatred . . .

Posted by: BlackOrchid at February 02, 2011 01:19 PM (SB0V2)

122 http://bit.ly/gakExF

a little satire on the milk situation

Posted by: pointsnfigures at February 02, 2011 01:20 PM (v0KWe)

123 65 Heh...tell me about it.

Posted by: unknown jane at February 02, 2011 01:21 PM (5/yRG)

124 Yes, you're correct. We must establish a Strategic Kitten Reserve!

Posted by: The EPA at February 02, 2011 01:21 PM (AZGON)

125 We need another Boston Tea Party, but instead of Tea in the harbor, we need to smash crates of CFL bulbs in the main EPA building.

Posted by: GMan at February 02, 2011 01:21 PM (fW0wg)

126 Hmmm... wait... Remember all those "Milk, it does a body good" commercials???
LAWSUIT? No spill plans?

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 02, 2011 01:22 PM (AdK6a)

127
Egypt. Same old same old, isn't it? We all know how it's gonna go:

1) Mobs and protests.
2) TV ratings go up.
3) People get killed.
4) Media personalities make the story about them.
5) In the end, bad guys are in charge.

Posted by: soothsayer deeds done dirt cheap at February 02, 2011 01:22 PM (t2wZz)

128 We are working on regulations to ban liquid milk because of the milk oil spills. Powered milk will become the new American normal.
snorts a line of 99% pure lactose

Posted by: EPA(Economic Prohibition Agency) at February 02, 2011 01:22 PM (J74Py)

129 EPA funding should be limited to whatever they can get via a Telethon. Al Gore weeping for 24 hours should rake in the elite cash.

Posted by: t-bird at February 02, 2011 01:22 PM (FcR7P)

130 Allz ur milk are belong to us

Posted by: Kitty Commander at February 02, 2011 01:23 PM (8s9tr)

131 @122
That was awesome.

Posted by: George Orwell at February 02, 2011 01:23 PM (AZGON)

132 If only her head could actually explode from hatred . . .

Posted by: BlackOrchid at February 02, 2011 01:19 PM (SB0V2)
Find a rare bird corpse, put it on her doorstep and turn her in.

Posted by: Oldcat at February 02, 2011 01:23 PM (z1N6a)

133 Excuse me...

CFL bulbs and hundreds of gallons of raw milk.

Posted by: GMan at February 02, 2011 01:23 PM (fW0wg)

134 The Biblical justification for the EPA:

It is better for your seed to fall into the belly of a whore than to be spilled upon the ground.

Either way, you're getting fucked. You won't enjoy it when it's us doing the fucking.





And you can't kill the EPA or fit it in your trunk if you could. I'm just sayin'.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 02, 2011 01:23 PM (xmuv/)

135 The EPA better not mess with my ass lube. That would get anal.....

Posted by: Bawny Fwank at February 02, 2011 01:24 PM (OlN4e)

136 And you can't kill the EPA or fit it in your trunk if you could. I'm just sayin'.

Posted by: Empire of Jeff at February 02, 2011 01:23 PM (xmuv/)
What if you make several trips?

Posted by: Oldcat at February 02, 2011 01:24 PM (z1N6a)

137 And warm up your hands, assholes, before you start pulling!

Posted by: bossy at February 02, 2011 01:24 PM (2rOwc)

138 You know....human breast milk contains oils too.

I'm all about motorboating regulating some breasts, but the other side of me doesn't want that kind of power.

Oh, what am I saying! 'Course I do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: EC at February 02, 2011 01:25 PM (mAhn3)

139 (2) Where do they bury the survivors?
There aren't any because Kelly's friends have pre-existing conditions?

Posted by: dagny at February 02, 2011 01:25 PM (ZuJDg)

140 Oh wait. NASA only gets involved if the cow is owned by a muslim with low self-esteem.
Who happened to want tobe a black farmer in Arkansas...if we could find him, we could give him his settlement check.

Posted by: Pigman Settlement Officer at February 02, 2011 01:25 PM (3lx5O)

141
Yes, you're correct. We must establish a Strategic Kitten Reserve!
Reporting for duty, sir. Meow.

Posted by: tabby at February 02, 2011 01:27 PM (2rOwc)

142 Well, I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?

Posted by: Robert Deniro at February 02, 2011 01:29 PM (J74Py)

143 Where is Mrs. O'Leary's cow when you need her?

Posted by: t-bird at February 02, 2011 01:29 PM (FcR7P)

144 "Well punch me in the face and call me Anderson Cooper. "

Now that's funny.
signed,
pissed off teabagger

Posted by: nerdygirl at February 02, 2011 01:30 PM (d9jgX)

145 I'm so fed up! Hurry 2012...Hurry! Can you imagine another four years of Obama?
Highway to Hell or something!

Posted by: Jimi at February 02, 2011 01:32 PM (SLttp)

146 My children are half sicilian. Is this going to be a problem for me?

With proper medical treatment, probably not...

Posted by: AGENT:ADDITIONAL BLONDE at February 02, 2011 01:34 PM (PMGbu)

147 Black Orchid
The farmer should have captured his rats and put them in the EPA lawyers house.

When snow gets too deep it accumulates and you can rake it off the roof from the ground with a long handled aluminum contraption. We got lots of fluffy white stuff in Michigan. And oh yes, to the envirostupids. I loves me my gas guzzling jeep.

Posted by: nerdygirl at February 02, 2011 01:35 PM (d9jgX)

148 The EPA took it's cue from the Democrats in Congress. Not much of a stretch to say if the Commerse Clause gives Congress authority to take over healthcare, that jurisdiction over petroleum oil spills extends to everything with any kind of oil content, which is just about everyfukkin'thang.

Posted by: maddogg at February 02, 2011 01:35 PM (OlN4e)

149 Just more evidence of why this corrupt group of assholes needs to be eliminated. Zero budget from the House.

No government regulation or agency ever makes it past 2 years before it becomes a power hungry monalith and no regulation at all EVER does what it was designed to do.

Posted by: Vic at February 02, 2011 01:39 PM (M9Ie6)

150 Maybe all governmental agencies should have a MAD clause added to their charters. That way, when two agencies argue, they explode (loudly publicly... Like matter vs. anti-matter. I'd pay to watch.

Posted by: jwpaine at February 02, 2011 01:40 PM (FUozQ)

151 I read about this a while ago - how they expect all of America's dairy farmers to build sufficient earthen berms to hold all the milk is beyond me. If this goes ahead, be ready to pay more for milk.
This unending assault from unelected busy-bodies, constant and coming from every quarter, is allowing them to win by sheer overwhelming numbers. The Legislature can't act fast enough to rein all these bastards in. There are just too many damn Leftist do-gooders infesting the US bureaucracy.

Posted by: Reactionary at February 02, 2011 01:44 PM (xUM1Q)

152 I say we organize a Million Milk March on DC and each of us dump a gallon of milk on the steps on the EPA building.

From my cold dead hands you bastards!!!

Posted by: mpfs at February 02, 2011 01:45 PM (iYbLN)

153 And oh yes, to the envirostupids. I loves me my gas guzzling jeep.
Posted by: nerdygirl at February 02, 2011 01:35 PM (d9jgX)
LOL... had to give the Neighbors Prius a jump this morning... with my SuperCharged (aftermarket) Dodge Durnago RT... I don't think she could figure out why I seemed amused...

Posted by: Romeo13 at February 02, 2011 01:52 PM (AdK6a)

154 125
We need another Boston Tea Party, but instead of Tea in the harbor, we
need to smash crates of CFL bulbs in the main EPA building.Posted by: GMan at February 02, 2011 01:21 PM (fW0wg)

I remain quite fond of my solution to stores which refuse to refund the purchase price for CFLs that expired way, way too soon - "accidently" let the bulb drop to their floor and let them pay for a hazmat cleanup of their shopping area instead.

Posted by: ya2daup at February 02, 2011 01:54 PM (7GfKM)

155 141 Yes, you're correct. We must establish a Strategic Kitten Reserve!Reporting for duty, sir. Meow.
Posted by: tabby at February 02, 2011 01:27 PM (2rOwc)
NO Taxes spent on Cats!

Posted by: Local Canine Union at February 02, 2011 01:55 PM (AdK6a)

156 Forget it, Venkman. You had your chance to co-opperate, but you though it would be more fun to insult me. Now, it's my turn, wiseass.

Posted by: Walter Peck at February 02, 2011 01:59 PM (SRLyD)

157 Is it time to start theburning yet?

Posted by: Trashcan Man at February 02, 2011 02:03 PM (jHv0E)

158 107 Has the EPA banned cows from farting yet?

Yes. Pooping, too.

Posted by: F Lee Bailey at February 02, 2011 02:13 PM (mQMnK)

159 #141, I plan on sending a letter to the EPA telling them that for justa hundred bucks a day, I can provide a dozen well-coordinated kittehs to move in and clean up spilled milk as contractors.
Fifty bucks a day just to keep them on call for emergencies.

Posted by: SGT Dan at February 02, 2011 02:21 PM (GgXZc)

160 So, when we can no longer DRILL FOR MILK what will those over filled cows do? And since though they are not OIL producesers otehrwise, what about the GAS SPILLS they have daily? OH I forgot....we are already regulating those in some parts of the world!

Posted by: rightzilla at February 02, 2011 02:54 PM (ujT7B)

161 Does the EPA have rule and regulations for breast milk?

Posted by: Farmer at February 02, 2011 02:54 PM (UE86j)

162 NO Taxes spent on Cats!

Posted by: Local Canine Union at February 02, 2011 01:55 PM (AdK6a)


Agreed, and also we demand our rights to live in your kitchen without being oppressed by feline, uh, oppression!

Posted by: Jerry Mouse, CEO of MouSEIU at February 02, 2011 02:59 PM (vy168)

163 This is one of those issues where I get depressed about being a small blogger. I wrote about this three months ago (my brother works in the dairy industry) but few noticed

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at February 02, 2011 03:01 PM (61b7k)

164 Ummm.
Can someone tell me precisely what ecological damage a film of raw butter does to the environment?
If I can digest it, then soil bacteria certainly can too.

I have been known to pour expired milk into the compost pile...

Posted by: lauraw at February 02, 2011 03:01 PM (DbybK)

165 They're gong to regulate my godamn hair next.

Posted by: Max Entropy at February 02, 2011 03:03 PM (lH6z9)

166 Link, Christopher?

Posted by: lauraw at February 02, 2011 03:03 PM (DbybK)

167 People have oil in them, too. In their hair and skin. Containment plans, inspections, and a schedule of fines to follow.
Hopefully this madness will be grist for the mill in Congress very soon.
Remember that old joke about an American explaining to another American how things work in Europe?
"In England, everything not explicitly forbidden is allowed. In Germany, everything not explicity allowed is forbidden. In France, everything is forbidden, but anything can be arranged."
We increasingly resemble France in that joke. I fully expect that if this regulation goes forward at all, there will be waivers for the right people.

Posted by: Valerie Jarrett addressing a three-star general at February 02, 2011 03:07 PM (w41GQ)

168 Tightens aluminimum foil cap, shiny side out.
Hmmm, combined with other efforts of this administration to limit food production (ethanol, eliminating irrigation flow to CA to save the delta smelt, regulating dust at farms, etc.), one might want to do an interwebs search on "holodomir."

Posted by: butch at February 02, 2011 05:02 PM (0APJ3)

169 I propose that every Moron and Moronette household submit their emergency action plan to the EPA as to what they will do if they spill milk 1) in their home 2) in the grocery store 3) in the vehicle on the way home 4) at a restaurant that serves milk.

If they want to be dicks, let's flood them with emergency action plans!

Posted by: Dan in MD at February 02, 2011 05:36 PM (1PuVO)

170 "If we can elect a Republican who has the actual balls to do away with their useless asses."

If I had some ham I'd make a ham sandwich, if I had some bread.

Posted by: Bugler at February 02, 2011 06:24 PM (VXBR1)

171 If there was one goverment agency that needed to be totaly abolished its the EPA its just another buracracy run wild

Posted by: Spurwing Plover at February 03, 2011 02:26 AM (vA9ld)

172 As I said in June, I told you so...


Posted by: SOYLENT GREEN at February 03, 2011 12:19 PM (jaoYN)

173 Is this the same reasons given for why ICE is involved in seizing and shutting down commercial websites without due process? What does ICE have to do with internet traffic?

Posted by: captainfish at February 03, 2011 12:22 PM (+2+jA)

174 altın çilek - fx15 - leke kremi - yudali - maurers - ozon yağı

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