1 Worse. Much worse.

/father of a daughter.

2 Wow. I have 3 kids. At times, all 3 can drive me absolutely crazy. But you would do anything for your kids. I can not imagine the loss these parents must be feeling. That is one gut wrenching post, Ace. Just gut wrenching.

3 A simple love that death can't destroy. Beautiful.

4

I know I'm a terrible person...

But after reading the story I'm sure there are about a dozen other people who thought the same thing. 

And if you're thinking it too, you know what I'm thinking. 

5 Ace, you asshole.  I've got something in my eye.

6 Dad of two girls. I've often thought about the devastation that losing one of them would bring. I think that finding something like this would just destroy me. I can't even click the link.

7 You asshole.  Thanks for making a grown man cry.  You asshole.

8 I'm not sure what you're thinking but all the proceeds of the book are going to cancer research.

9 12thMonkey, if you mean what I think you mean, it's addressed in the article: "All proceeds from the book are going to the Cure Starts Now Cancer Foundation, one of the only charities dedicated to finding a unified cure for all forms of cancer."

10 >>>But after reading the story I'm sure there are about a dozen other people who thought the same thing.

I know what you are thinking, but they said profits were going to a cancer charity.

11 And if you're thinking it too, you know what I'm thinking.

I'm thinking it too. Shall we sit together on the express-train to hell?

12 Now that we've addressed it, is that what you were thinking?

13 man that's fucking devastating

14

Many are addressed for Gracie and one reads 'I love you Gracie, Go Go.'

Too cute. So sad.

15 Fuck.  Cancer.

16 He is thinking (kind of obvious) these letters are either faked, or the circumstances are faked -- that they were found all along, but are being claimed to be "hidden" until after death, to make a good story out of it and so by to profit from it.

It's a legitimate bit of cynicism, but as they said, profits are going to a charity.

17 I thought it too, in case that helps you not feel as bad.

18
Heartbreaking

19 I lost my child for a few hours, and lived every minute wondering if I would ever see her again. God was good, and she was found, seven hours later, heck and gone from where she started out-she got horribly, horribly turned around. But I have my baby, who I would have given my life for.

God bless these parents, because they have gone through the worst thing a parent can face. I pray for their comfort, and bless them for finding a way to deal with the grief that blesses others. 12th, I think that our society has become so inured with individuals who DO take advantage in this way, that it is natural to think it's just one more person trying to find a way to milk a situation. I don't blame you for feeling that way. I am just sorry that our lifestyle makes that thought even come to mind.

20
What's almost as sad is all the god-haters writing nasty comments about the story.

21 I thought it also.

22 that really is the saddest, sweetest story ever. I cried.

23 Having recently lost a 9 year old to cancer (this last June), I can tell you that finding notes like this from my son would make my day, month, quarter, and year.  

Losing a child is terrible - it's truly as bad as it gets.  And being reminded of it makes surviving parents melancholy.   But it also brings smiles and remembrances of better times.   So finding something like this would truly be a treasure.  No doubt about it at all.

24

It's a legitimate bit of cynicism, but as they said, profits are going to a charity.

let's say it wasn't going to charity, what would be wrong with that? I can only imagine this family had to go into debt to help pay for cancer related treatment. I bet their daughter was in the hospital for extended periods of time, which cost a lot even with insurance. Also if they made money off it, what is wrong with that? It would help ensure a better future for the surviving daughter.

It's going to charity, that's great, but I wouldn't care if it wasn't. These people lost a five year old daughter to brain cancer and have to live with that for the rest of their lives, in my mind they are a charity unto themselves.

25

Yes, I read about the profits of this book going to cancer charities.

However, I'm still thinking what I'm thinking.  Can't help it. 

That's an awful lot of notes and letters to be found all over the place coincidentally right after this young girl passed. 

I'm not saying... I'm just saying. 

I hope it's all good and for all the right reasons. 

26 You are indeed a prick, dude. Hanky!

27
My little voice in my head tells me these people are not the same as Fake Balloon Boy's parents.

28

Posted by: RightwingProf at November 05, 2009 01:19 PM (UOcNk)

I am so, so very sorry.  I refuse to try to imagine.

29 I have two little girls. I can't even bear the thought. God bless those parents, and that little girl, and all of those who lose a child.

30

Sorry for your loss Rightwingprof. I don't have kids, but i have two nephews and two potential nephew/nieces coming soon, I couldn't imagine what it would do to my sisters.

 

The death of children has to be one the worst parts of being human.

31 RightwingProf,

I am so very sorry as well. My heart goes out to you and your family.

32 Good God...I am the father of an 8 year old girl and couldn't imagine what these parents must have gone through.

By the way, I bawled my eyes out.  Thank goodness I am working from home today.

33 Just  Heartbreaking & heartwarming at the same time !!!! Can that be Possible ?????????

34 I passed the story along to a few others.  No reason why I should have to sit here and be the only one straining to see the screen through tears.

35 I didn't post that to be a buzz killer.   It sucks - no doubt.  But the human heart has an amazing capacity to move on.   We've had the mixed blessing of knowing a lot of families in the childhood cancer community, and many have lost children.   The pattern is often the same - people move forward (at least most do).  You feel sorrow, but you most eventually get back on with their lives - a little less sad as time goes on, and much more involved with their other children. 

It's definitely better when there are other children around the house.  The little buggers have an amazing capacity for making us stop being such self-centered bastiches.

36 My daughter leaves things like this around all the time.  She is fine and writes notes like this about our family, her dogs (even her brother once in a while).

There is no doubt in my mind this could happen.  I also don't believe that they would make this up.

Also, sorry for your loss RightwingProf.  You'll be in my prayers.

37 Ace, something is wrong with your HTML.  The text is all blurry.

38 >>>et's say it wasn't going to charity, what would be wrong with that?

I don't think anything would be wrong with it, really, but it would give rise to the suspicion.

39 Ace, something is wrong with your HTML.  The text is all blurry.

Sure it's not the pickle spanking finally catching up with you?

40 Whether this gives her parents comfort or makes it all the more unbearable I don't know.

I think it would make me cry like a baby.

41

Bless you, RightwingProf.

And thanks for the sad, sweet tears, Ace.

42

 

Geebus.

43 This made me cry.  What a sweet little angel she was.  What a horrific loss for her family. 

44 My allergies are acting up and I've got something in my eyes. Yeah...that's it. Allergies.

45 "My daughter leaves things like this around all the time. She is fine and writes notes like this about our family, her dogs (even her brother once in a while)."

My seven-year-old does this stuff too, and has since she learned how to write (and before that, she scribbled and drew her "I love you, mama" notes). I have no doubt that this could happen. If something awful happened to her, I'm sure I would find little notes like this for some time.

*sniff*

I think I need a kleenex.

46

Nope, couldn't finish the story. 4 grown kids and 5 grandchildren. Tried to finish it, but couldn't. the thought of it happening to any of my kiddos is not something i can contemplate or imagine.

May God bless and give comfort to any of us here who have had it happen to them.

47 uh, sorry to be a cynic, but right off "Daily Mail?" I wouldn't believe them if they said the sky was blue. And the parents are putting all this in a book. Did the little girl draw all that? Ok, that I'll buy. Did she hide hundreds of them all over the house for them to find after she died? Doesn't pass the smell test, sorry. Plus, would you tell a 5 year old they were going to die for cripes sake?? Lastly, I have a 4 year old. He does get into stuff. He does do some sneaky stuff I don't find about until later. He could not hide HUNDREDS of things around the house without me seeing him or finding ONE of them before very long. It's a great story, it's a great myth, but is it true? Sorry, I'm just too cynical to believe it actually is. Good cause, buy the book, but they wouldn't have had to make up this story for it to be sweet. As it is, it kind of ruins the story for me. Just say she wrote a lot of notes for them to remember her by. Don't embeliish it that she hid them all over the house, knowing she would be dead when they found them. That just beggars belief.

48 I just got double-whammied. I started to read this post just as The Golden State by John Doe started up on my stereo. Some of the lyrics go: "You are... the lump in my throat/You are... the aching in my heart."

Curse you, ace.

49 Not sweet... Ghoulish.

50 My parents are both gone ... I wish often to find a message from them in a book or a box.

Being a parent, this would be agony. But it would be a sweet agony .... knowing that the beautiful child realized that the end of her life did not mean the end of all life, and that love would and could endure. Sadness not being the ultimate, but only the gateway. That is profound, and, in all the best ways, so very human.

What a remarkable little girl. Imagine being her age and taking joy, real joy, in thinking that her mum and dad would find these, and pouring out her own anguish by making tens and hundreds of these. That we could all stall our own despair by making a moment for another. That we could all think that we were so truly loved that these messages would be a blessing and not a curse. There's the heart in the heart shaped message.

A five year old girl more wise than most of us would ever be. Saintly, so sadly saintly. No despair there, only imagine the mind of a child imagining reality.

51 It's enough to make a cynical old hard-heart tear up a bit, sitting here in my office. And yeah, the same cynical thoughts some of you had about the authenticity of it passed through my mind. But I don't think it's so here.

And of course there were scum who wrote mocking comments on the Daily Mail site. Of course. Why they are allowed to roam the world, while the little girl is gone...that's a hell of a question.

52 I assure you a six-year-old can and does think of such things as writing notes and leaving them. The capacity of kids at that age for making grand gestures is amazing and, to be frank, sometimes a bit silly. It's a parent's job to appreciate the gestures, even the silly ones, as TOTALLY GENUINE. If you need to apply a gentle corrective, do it gently. This one was pure as it gets, and I hope you cynics allow for some shame in the mix. This story hits home hard. That's all I'll say about that. Morons are passed masters (yes that's the correct spelling) at being cynics. But sometimes you have to lay it aside and allow some humanity to accrete on that shell of cheeze dust and pudding covering the moronish carapace. Still lurking. I'll post again when I'm ready. Yes I'm working on the site. Bless this family and I hope my Mom meets this little girl.

53 ms docweasel, go to the website  http://www.notesleftbehind.com/ and stop being so cynical.

54 Think of this girl (after the tears abate), as the kind of patient who will always be inoperable IF Pelosi's socialist dreams and hopes come true.

55 listen, if it makes you feel good to believe this story, fine. But it just doesn't make sense in several very important facts. Sorry, but I believe truth is kinder and more pure than making up some sweet fiction. Actually, I'd guess the Daily Mail embeliished the story, they are famous for it. And in doing so, I think they ruined it. Yeah, children might leave a note behind. Hundreds? That they are finding weeks and months later? Please. You'd have to be retarded to believe this story. I love a sweet story, but I detest bathos. This is bathetic.

56

good reminder that while our lives our finite our capacity to love is not.

57
You either have never had kids, or if you did you were not present much.  I'll allow for any of your children to not have been able to accomplish what this little girl did, but at Six, both of my kids could read and write very well, and they wrote and drew every damned day.

I don't care if this isn't the flame thread.  You deserve more scorn than I can muster at the moment.

58 Friggin javascript box.  That was addressed to Docweasel.

59 Can't stop crying.

60 Do a little research. It's a hoax. There are dozens of sites talking about it, here's one: http://celebgalz.com/elena-desserich-is-elena-desserich-a-hoax-video/

jesus

61

It has always seemed to me that children who are terminal seem to have wisdom far beyond their age. In the manner they speak, their thoughts and their actions.  Its like this wisdom was purposedly given to them.  

62 Yeah, children might leave a note behind. Hundreds? That they are finding weeks and months later? Please. You'd have to be retarded to believe this story. I love a sweet story, but I detest bathos. This is bathetic.

Posted by: ms. docweasel at November 05, 2009 02:04 PM (kgwdA)

wow. you must be the life of any party!

63 My daughter used to leave notes for me to find all the time, especially in my studio which was detached from the house. Even though the kids were always welcome to visit me while I was working, and often did, the notes were special beyond all thought.

I'm guessing the parents found some of these notes before she passed, but that doesn't really change the story as far as I'm concerned.

64 Great,

Whenever I "do some research," I like to post someone else making an unsupported accusation.  That makes it all the more credible.

Hey, do some research, and go visit some kids.  Learn about their capacity for reading and writing.  Yeah, fine, it MmAaYyyyybe a hoax.  Just like the Holocaust and the Moon landing.  There are still folks claiming the Earth is flat, too.

I like to operate on risk assessment.  That means looking at the odds, and odds are: it's probably real.  You dig up some serious facts that prove (you understand the concept of "prove" does not involve unsupported accusations and hearsay, right?) it's a hoax, and I'll change my odds.  I'm generous like that.

65 60 Do a little research. It's a hoax. There are dozens of sites talking about it, here's one: http://celebgalz.com/elena-desserich-is-elena-desserich-a-hoax-video/

jesus

Posted by: ms. docweasel at November 05, 2009 02:23 PM (kgwdA)

If you had "proof" this was a hoax you would have posted it, rather than a link to some blog (probably your own) that says this could be a hoax, and then gives nothing else. Maybe you should change your name to ms. crapweasel?

66 As a father with a daughter who turns 5 in two weeks, thanks a lot for making me tear up at work. Jerk. I come here to laugh at liberals!

67

No making me all bleary at work, bastard...

And I think that finding little things like that hidden around the house would be uplifting.  As someone who believes in an afterlife, it would serve as notice that my little girl was still around, albeit not in this realm, but never far, and certainly never gone.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to *cough* go get another Claritin from my car...

68 My five year old daughter makes notes and drawings for me all the time. She'll say "That's you, daddy, and me next to you holding your hand." She even brings them to me when I wake up in the morning sometime. Died in the wool cynic that I am, I can easily imagine her doing what you read in the story above. And I would cry every single time that I found such a note, while simultaneously remembering the joy that she brought me.

And now I have to go wipe my eyes. The thought of my little girl (or either of my sons) dying makes my heart seize up and my eyes water.

69 As the father of two daughters about this age, Ace, I'd say that they will cling to these like the lifeline their incredibly child intended them to be.
Dammit, I'm supposed to be working and you've got me all distracted.

70

"And of course there were scum who wrote mocking comments on the Daily Mail site. Of course. Why they are allowed to roam the world, while the little girl is gone...that's a hell of a question."

Clearly, God still has work to do on them.

71

"Dammit, I'm supposed to be working and you've got me all distracted."

...which is why you and I both are on AoSHQ in the first place, right...?

72

Father of a 4 and 2 year old here. Not clicking the link.

A former co-worker lost his young son to cancer a couple years back. They were on CaringBridge and it got to where I couldn't stand to go get updates. I had to have my wife do it and fill me in so I didn't just come all apart.

73 On the notion that "dozens" of sites are talking about something:

Personally, I love the phrase "all over the web."

What does that mean?  According to some folks who make a serious effort to determine the "size" of the Web, there are over 200 Million "sites" out there.

But let's pare that down a bit.  How many blogs are there?  Hard to say, but these folks try to figure that out, and they report that in 2007, 22.6 Million bloggers were flogging blogs with 94.1 Million goggling at their blogging.

Those are some numbers for the folks. I'm guessing that you need to take relative "authority" into account, since the majority of blogs are what have been fondly termed "kitteh" blogs, but which are better viewed as nulls.  So being generous, let's figure that you have a couple hundred-thou or so blogs and news sites that have actual audiences.

Perspective.

You're welcome.

74 I am at work, you heartless bastard.

75 If only she'd had health insurance.

76 I went to the notesleftbehind website and I must say I was very much put off by how slickly packaged and commercialized it was. I felt as if I was being duped or, at best, shamelessly manipulated.

Just sayin'.

77

Rightwing Prof -- I'm so sorry, please accept my condolences.  That is a very hard burden to bear -- if it helps, I truly do think that death isn't some mudane finality, rather it's just a corner we turn around in the ongoing process of life or maybe a door we go through; we living here just haven't gotten to that part of the journey yet.

At this point, would it really matter 12Monkeys?  Having a slew of children in the house I can easily see an enormous output in drawings and letters just in the space of one day, so that part I can believe; the hiding them, maybe -- children are remarkably attuned to and protective of their families, especially their parent's feeling (even when they are being obnoxious little rug rats).  But the primary point in this little story is more a case of what effect it has on its audience -- I found it bittersweet and uplifting; a short life, but perhaps a very worthwhile one, and how many people can claim they've led a worthwhile life.

78 What a heartbreaker. It's amazing that a child had that much foresight and compassion to give her family at least a bit of comfort after she passed. Bless 'em.

79 What a darling child. 

80

Posted by: ms. docweasel at November 05, 2009 01:51 PM (kgwdA)

Oh for christ's fuckin' sake.  Thanks for popping up just to inform us that no one, especially enlightened cynics, could believe that a child could be so insightful.

Thanks. Now get lost.

49 Not sweet... Ghoulish.

Posted by: DoDoGuRu at November 05, 2009 01:53 PM (Xdxf

How snarky.

81 55 You'd have to be retarded to believe this story. I love a sweet story, but I detest bathos. This is bathetic.

Posted by: ms. docweasel at November 05, 2009 02:04 PM (kgwdA)

Okay, here's a story that fits your narrative. They sat the child down knowing she only had maybe 4 months left in this world, gave her a stack of paper and crayons, and said: "Go to town honey, we'll make millions off this "bathetic" story.

You happy now?

82 Not having kids, I can't truly imagine, but my gut instinct matched what RWProf said in #23.  Yes, it may bring back a sense of loss, but it also brings the good memories.  Perhaps ones of snuggling up with Mom and Dad in front of the fireplace with hot chocolate on Christmas Eve, of being woken up by "Look we made you breakfast" or "Please can we take him home?" (about the first puppy they see). 

Remembering someone you loved who has died is not a bad thing, they live on in our hearts, the remembering brings them back to life, if only for a few moments.  Try remembering "something bad" about a loved one no longer with you, go ahead, try.  Bet you can't.

Sorry, have to go dry my eyes now.

83 I'm sitting here with tears rolling down my face and I couldn't click the link. Excuse me, I have to go hug my little ones.

84 "Okay, here's a story that fits your narrative. They sat the child down knowing she only had maybe 4 months left in this world, gave her a stack of paper and crayons, and said: "Go to town honey, we'll make millions off this "bathetic" story. You happy now?" Close. Just Google Elena whatever hoax, there are plenty of pretty good guesses as to what went on. The girl was unable to walk, unable to talk, and often unconscious. She wasn't hiding notes, she was struggling for her life. That's a great story right there. Needed no embellishment. However, what seems to have transpired is the girl DID write some notes, unaware she was dying. In the light of her illness, they were especially poignant. However, they weren't enough for a book the parents were very anxious to write, to make money for cancer research (let's give them the benefit of the doubt on that, although they were going to give the "profits" to cancer research, meaning all 'costs' would be taken out first, including their living expenses, rent, food, insurance, any bills at all in fact, as cost of living.)

There was not enough material for a book. The publisher wanted more. The little sister was first drafted to concoct some more notes along the lines of her sister, but was either too young or not artistic enough to pull it off. The parents took over and fabricated hundreds, enough to credibly fill a book, adding any items the girl had done in the years before the illness, along with the tale of how she hid them around the house. Voila, a tale full of emotion and pathos and a lot of visuals to go with it.

There is some kind of rule that you can't doubt people when their child is involved. The Heene's didn't disprove that rule, they just showed why that rule is bullshit.

I don't mind an emotional story, even if it's fiction. What I don't like is being manipulated, especially when money is involved. A LOT of money is involved here. Someone made a pretty slick and professional website, there's a book, and what do you want to bet a TV movie, mini-series or even theatrical major Hollywood movie (or musical!!) to come. We're talking hundreds of millions.

You want to believe in this fairy tale, that's fine. It was a sweet and poignant story before they twisted it. Now it's just a disgusting degradation and exploitation of an innocent little girl who died too young, making a mockery and a joke of her. Her parents deserve our pity, all right, and so does her little sister. She may actually be better off, odd as that seems.

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86 My girls write little notes all the time, but they're usually not like this [they're usually really funny]

two recent notes between my daughters [6yo and 4yo]
http://meep.livejournal.com/1839754.html

http://meep.livejournal.com/1839895.html

I found the second one later, but it was really funny because I realized what she had done.

87 And it's not like my kids try to hide notes, but they just leave them sitting around because they get distracted.... and I find them much later when I'm picking up papers.

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As a boy I witnessed and felt the devastation the death of my little brother had on our family.  As a father of four I cannot help but to feel terribly sorry for the grief and anguish this family is experiencing.  That little girl must have thought that her family would be very sad and did something wonderful to remind them what they meant to her and that she loved them.

Her act was a blessing and she is an angel.

91

It's difficult to comment on that one without being trite.

In a word, sad.

Thanks, Ace, for peeling away the thick skin that too often camoflages our humanity.

92 My brother was, and still is, great at hiding things. Not always notes, but lots of different things. Hundreds of things, sometimes "in plain sight." It was amazing what he could hide when he was younger. Kids are smart.

Also I doubt that the parents were exactly taking the house apart when their little girl was dying. They were probably concentrated on her and the issue of her death... Hence I can understand if they didn't find them for awhile.

93

Even though it's unrelated, I'm reminded of the Jewish children drawings on the walls of their concentration camps. Probably one of the most heart breaking images I've ever seen. We need to hurry and find a cure for cancer. It takes so many lives in such a horrible way.

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Posted by: ms. docweasel at November 05, 2009 09:17 PM (kgwdA)

You've thrown a turd in the punchbowl. We get it. If that made you happy, this'll really sate your cynical appetite:

It's really one of those Nigerian email scams...no...wait, even better...The Daily Mail made the whole thing up. There is no Desserich family and no child with cancer. It was just a scripted poignant story they decided to publish.  It was just a ploy to draw out wizend cynics so they can set the rest of us straight about hoaxes and urban legends.

Is that a better narrative?

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