Cool Facts About Susan Roesgen

Cool Fact One: She's a Big Vagina Lady.

Goofin': Jon Stewart goofs on Susan Roesgen, selling herself as a hero at the recent Fargo flood. Starts at 1:20.

Posted by: Ace at 03:26 PM

Comments

1 What a silly bunt.

Posted by: Monty Python at April 15, 2009 03:28 PM (fagDq)

2 Her vagina smells so bad... how do I put this? It smells like she washes her vagina with... dirtier vaginas.

Posted by: Dane Cook at April 15, 2009 03:29 PM (gEsIJ)

3 CNN is also looking for a microphone? Test Test Testing 1-2-3!

Posted by: Fish at April 15, 2009 03:43 PM (CG+cG)

4 Susan Roesgen dreams of being walked on a leash by Barack Obama just like Bo the dog.

If Bo ever ends up in pot of boiling water the Secret Service should start with her as their prime suspect.

Posted by: DrewM. at April 15, 2009 03:44 PM (hlYel)

5 Meh. I've called a pussy before.
..and after too.

Posted by: sickinmass at April 15, 2009 03:45 PM (/i4dU)

6 I would of asked her to please remove the presidents DICK from her mouth so we could have a conversation.

Bwahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Posted by: Lisa at April 15, 2009 03:45 PM (2MRQo)

7 Does anybody have any Walton and Johnson dirt from Susan's days in NOLA?

Nips? Anything? I'm trying to remember but I think all the potholes on the Earhart jarred my brain loose.

Posted by: IreneFingIrene at April 15, 2009 03:45 PM (MFQJZ)

8 One time, at band camp...?

Posted by: Susan Roesgen at April 15, 2009 03:46 PM (gEsIJ)

9 Okay, my crappy computer won't play the vides of this woman.

What did she do so I can join in the bashing?

Posted by: Dave at April 15, 2009 03:47 PM (Xm1aB)

10 not vides, video, sorry

Posted by: Dave at April 15, 2009 03:48 PM (Xm1aB)

11 Sure are a lot of Axelturfers out today.

Posted by: Vic at April 15, 2009 03:48 PM (f6os6)

Vides are vaginas with ears!

Posted by: Fish at April 15, 2009 03:49 PM (CG+cG)

13 I must protest. This individual is not representative of our fine rank and file. We revoked her union card long ago. Scab.

Posted by: Vagina Local 375 at April 15, 2009 03:49 PM (AZGON)

14
So this is Larry David?

And he figured that if Jerry Seinfeld can do a tv show with almost no acting skills, he can do a tv show with no acting skills?

Posted by: Darlingadingdongarama at April 15, 2009 03:54 PM (AgHDo)

15 That was funny, but I could not watch it all at once. I did not watch the part after the baseball was found to be missing... .

Posted by: cranky-d at April 15, 2009 03:55 PM (ymqGA)

16 You know what is fun? Making tired, unfunny jokes about conservatives.

Posted by: Billy Ray at April 15, 2009 03:57 PM (BFeHJ)

OK, so I was trying to find a pic of Helen Thomas to link to make a "scrunt's lesbian lover" crack, but google images doesn't have a "large" one.

I wonder why that is.

Posted by: jdub at April 15, 2009 03:58 PM (t9pKb)

18 an unforgettable Larry David moment...

Posted by: someone at April 15, 2009 03:59 PM (1wXl7)

19 On a positive note. Even if 1,000,000 people were crazy enough to protest today ( and I doubt that even 1/2 that many protested all over the U.S.) the population of the US from the 2006 census puts the total population at 306 million people that means that less then .4% of the population, is insane.

Posted by: Ace's acolytes at April 15, 2009 04:02 PM (BFeHJ)

20 I didn't say it twice... that was the echo...

Posted by: dri at April 15, 2009 04:02 PM (SBX9Y)

21 Larry David is another "comedian" who thought that being a querulous douchebag was the same as being funny. He was the prototype for George Costanza, and it shows. That said, he's on to something with the big-vajayjay thing.

Ladies, the Ark of the Covenant is a wonderful place. The best place on earth, in fact. But it is not endlessly malleable, nor is it infinitely commdious. When you allow something the size of Grond inside, anything less will of course seem feeble in comparison. Most gentlemen will of course not complain -- even a warm hallway has its charms, even though we prefer a close-fitting glove -- but it is somewhat rude for the owner of the hallway to complain later about the size of the gentleman walking around inside.

Until the wonderful day comes when science shall restore Teh Snappy, please: do not reflexively blame the gents.

Posted by: Monty at April 15, 2009 04:04 PM (/0a60)

22 OMG!!!! I'm going to post the same thing in multiple threads!!! And each time ... it'll be just as lame!!!

Posted by: Queerbait Franky at April 15, 2009 04:05 PM (BFeHJ)

23 Posted by: Ace's acolytes at April 15, 2009 04:02 PM (BFeHJ)

But when one gold star mother and a whole bus load of supporters sit outside Bush's ranch, the foreign policy of the US much change.

Funny how the narrative always works in favor of the left with the MSM.

Posted by: DrewM. at April 15, 2009 04:06 PM (hlYel)

24 Even if 1,000,000 people were crazy enough to protest today

So protesting, which we were constantly told for the last 8 years was the most patriotic of acts, is now crazy....

Damn, I wish you guys could keep your shit straight.

Posted by: wiserbud at April 15, 2009 04:07 PM (wWwJR)

25 you're on a roll today monty, all over the threads. where ya been?

Posted by: jdub at April 15, 2009 04:07 PM (t9pKb)

26 Jeebus, but trolls are fucking lazy.

Posted by: George Orwell at April 15, 2009 04:09 PM (AZGON)

27 Susan Roesgen is so biased that if you look at here from the side she is transparent.

K

Posted by: Kestrel♠ at April 15, 2009 04:10 PM (hiJnV)

28 jdub:

I got sidetracked for long while with health and work issues. Nothing serious, but it kept me away from teh intertubes a good bit.

Posted by: Monty at April 15, 2009 04:12 PM (/0a60)

29 Short shit Jon Liebewitz is far from funny. Sheesh, make some faces and make fun of conservatives and he is supposed to be funny? Stand up Jon! Oh you are already standing Lieboditz. What putz in the first degree.

Posted by: BillyBob at April 15, 2009 04:17 PM (cWg6W)

If you don't have sex for a long time it'll actually tighten up again, "re-virginize" as it were.

Um, so I've heard.

What? You guys started it.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at April 15, 2009 04:21 PM (AJ4xq)

31 I fucking hate this comment filter. A properly-tagged URL shouldn't be filtered, and it shouldn't make you start over when it rejects something.

Posted by: Original Roy at April 15, 2009 04:24 PM (jV0wG)

32 If you don't have sex for a long time it'll actually tighten up again, "re-virginize" as it were.

I am intrigued and aroused. You have made your Captain happy. Off to the Captain's quarters with you; I shall be along shortly.

Posted by: Monty at April 15, 2009 04:25 PM (/0a60)

ParanoidGirlInSeattle at April 15, 2009 04:21 PM (AJ4xq)

Ace has a dept. head for you - Department of Blog Thread Revitalization

Posted by: Roadking at April 15, 2009 04:25 PM (Ftz2N)

34 Funny, I found that ALL vaginas are pretty tight...

Posted by: Grond at April 15, 2009 04:25 PM (iafWn)

35 Thanks Ace. It's so refreshing to know that it's just not the Taliban that hate women.

Posted by: Cindy at April 15, 2009 04:27 PM (kii7P)

Sorry Monty, my wench costume is at the dry cleaners.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at April 15, 2009 04:30 PM (AJ4xq)

37 @35: Cindy, this thread is about vaginas. Who said anything about women??

Posted by: CoolCzech at April 15, 2009 04:34 PM (iafWn)

Actually Cindy, unlike the Taliban I believe Ace and crew would prefer to see women clothed as little as possible. And, they don't go much for stoning women for riding in cars with men, or tossing acid at women trying to go to school. So, your analogy is way the fuck off.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at April 15, 2009 04:36 PM (AJ4xq)

39 ParanoidGirlInSeattle. I have no doubt that Ace and his misogynist posters like seeing women with no clothes on. Provided that is of course that they don't have careers or god forbid opinions. I don't see Ace or his moderators doing anything about for instance the second comment in this thread. That's not attacking a person for their ideas, that's attacking women fullstop.

Posted by: Cindy at April 15, 2009 04:42 PM (kii7P)

@35: Cindy, this thread is about vaginas. Who said anything about women??

Yeah - why do you have to fuck up this sweet, sweet vagina thread with all of that woman stuff. You have some serious issues.

Posted by: Roadking at April 15, 2009 04:44 PM (Ftz2N)

41 That's not attacking a person for their ideas, that's attacking women fullstop.

Wake us when you're done whining.

kthxbai...

Posted by: Additional Blond Agent at April 15, 2009 04:46 PM (PMGbu)

42 I think Cindy's problem is that when somebody screams out "Smelly vag" she says "What?"

Posted by: Captain Hate at April 15, 2009 04:47 PM (dYNX5)

43 I would punch Larry David in the throat if I ever saw him.

Posted by: jaleach at April 15, 2009 04:50 PM (gHrZU)

44 This thread is not family viewing.

/susan

Posted by: Filly at April 15, 2009 04:50 PM (qoOdC)

45 I once heard Jason Alexander remark in an interview that George Costanza was just like Larry David, only not as crazy. I'm fairly certain he intended to say that George was crazier than Larry but made a Freudian slip.

Imagine that.

Posted by: Kensington at April 15, 2009 04:53 PM (TWkX+)

46 In Larry David's defense, I enjoyed a joke he made about finally being able to turn on all the lights in his house after his rabid eco-lefty wife left him.

Posted by: Kensington at April 15, 2009 04:54 PM (TWkX+)

47 Stay classy guys.

Posted by: Cindy at April 15, 2009 04:54 PM (kii7P)

48 Vinegar and water, Cindy; it might be Mission Highly Improbable but it beats your tireless whining

Posted by: Captain Hate at April 15, 2009 04:59 PM (dYNX5)

49 Cindy Dear,

Has anyone ever pointed out to you what a self-righteous, utterly humorless, extremely judgmental prig you are?

Just wondering.

Posted by: CoolCzech at April 15, 2009 04:59 PM (iafWn)

50 #42 Captain Hate. This whole internet thing must very frustrating for you not being able to punch women like me as you would normally do when some uppity chick expressed an opinion.

Posted by: Cindy at April 15, 2009 04:59 PM (kii7P)

Cindy, as a woman I am actually more offended by your outrage over this post then I am about the post. Especially your comparison of this blog to the Taliban.

I have a career, I have opinions. My opinions have been valued and respected here from day one of posting. Regardless of the ribald humor and the inneuendoes I've traded with the guys, they have always respected my opinions about political issues.

I don't find the guys on this blog to be misogynists. They don't hate women, they love women. Joking about a woman's vagina doesn't automatically make a guy a misogynist.

Fuck. I absolutely hate members of my sex sometimes. Shit. I guess that makes me a misogynist.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at April 15, 2009 05:01 PM (AJ4xq)

52 @50: judgmental! Judgmental!

Posted by: CoolCzech at April 15, 2009 05:02 PM (iafWn)

53 Hey, I'm better than nothin' !

Posted by: Unusually Large Vagina at April 15, 2009 05:04 PM (7FgWm)

54 Not really; the women here are pretty interesting to interact with. You're the only one that seems to have difficulty not playing the put upon victim. I'm sure you're not at all like that in real life; that's why you come here and start complaining.

You sound like you're fairly familiar with people that like to beat women; maybe that's why you project that on other people that you don't know.

Posted by: Captain Hate at April 15, 2009 05:04 PM (dYNX5)

55 @4 DrewM

If Bo ever ends up in pot of boiling water the Secret Service should start with her as their prime suspect.

As I told my lefty neighbor walking his chihuahua the other night, "You know, when I liven in Korea, they called these Cornish Game Dogs."

Posted by: MikeO at April 15, 2009 05:06 PM (hz67i)

56 Heh, i'm better than nothin'!

Posted by: Unusually Large Vagina at April 15, 2009 05:06 PM (7FgWm)

Giv it a break, Cindy.Take it to Pandagon, mmmmkay?

I'm a chick, btw.

Posted by: Unusually Large Vagina at April 15, 2009 05:08 PM (7FgWm)

58 Hey, Cindy!

You probably shouldn't be here.

For there to be offense, offense must be taken.

I'm sure that there are at least ten or twelve other sites on the internet--maybe one of those would be more your speed.

Posted by: MikeO at April 15, 2009 05:08 PM (hz67i)

Cindy....take the whining to Pandagon, mmmmkay?

Posted by: Unusually Large Vagina at April 15, 2009 05:10 PM (7FgWm)

60 I think we should take Cindy's concerns into account. I mean, I realize that women aren't exactly people in the strictest sense of the word, but it seems ill-advised to ignore whatever the hell she was talking about just now. I was sort of distracted by ParanoidGirlInSeattle and lost track of what Cindy was bleating about.

And ParanoidGirlInSeattle: don't worry about the wench costume, because you won't really need it for what I have in mind.

Posted by: Monty at April 15, 2009 05:11 PM (dCZbI)

61 I love how this idiot "journalist" can't see the connection between taxes and freedom.

Posted by: Jay at April 15, 2009 05:12 PM (iy1Xt)

62 This happens every time the C-bomb gets dropped .

Posted by: Bill D. Cat at April 15, 2009 05:20 PM (d0YiG)

Cindy, you really need to get over yourself. There are lots of women who post here, with opinions galore, and I've yet to see one put upon over it (unless they are posting lefty douchenozzle horseshit, in which case they will get zinged just as fast as their male counterparts).

And yes, we play rough here. Deal with it. If you are going to run with the big dogs, you'd better be ready to take a bite now and then. Otherwise, stay under the porch.

Posted by: Cave Bear at April 15, 2009 05:21 PM (EKMxC)

64 Cindy,

I appreciate your concern. Now please use your real MALE name and stop being such a drippy twat.

Posted by: ace at April 15, 2009 05:32 PM (gEsIJ)

65 In fairness, "Cindy" (Bryan) is right: We don't respect any of the women here.

We are, however, chivalrous enough to pretend we do.

And I think we should be praised for that.

Posted by: ace at April 15, 2009 05:33 PM (gEsIJ)

66 Guys, don't be so hard on Cindy. It's hard to be happy when the only man you can get is some faggoty, bi-curious leftwinger you met at a candlight vigil.

Posted by: Warden at April 15, 2009 05:34 PM (MZ8Zz)

67 I don't believe that cindy is a woman.

I do believe that he gets it from a bi-curious leftwinger, however.

Posted by: ace at April 15, 2009 05:35 PM (gEsIJ)

Oh, Cindy is Brian?

Well my point still stands.

Posted by: Warden at April 15, 2009 05:36 PM (MZ8Zz)

Damn!

Beaten to the punch again!

Posted by: Warden at April 15, 2009 05:36 PM (MZ8Zz)

70 Well Cindy I don't know about Captain Hate. But I want to beat the shit out of you and then rape you with a fucking spiked bat.

Posted by: Diablo at April 15, 2009 05:44 PM (9nWUU)

71 Bryan's just trying to score some womyn pooter from the other student's in Women's Studies 101. Cindy is probably her name.

"look at how I grappled with the misogynistic wingnuts at AoS in your honor! Now can you touch it for me?"

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 15, 2009 05:46 PM (MlEgW)

72 And I can't believe that we had a vagina thread without the word "pooter". You morons are slacking.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at April 15, 2009 05:48 PM (MlEgW)

73 It's all Cindy/Bryan's fault; it distracted us before we could break out the pooter/cooter, quim, slit, gash, bearded clam, camel toe, monkey chin, vertical smile comments.

Posted by: Captain Hate at April 15, 2009 06:02 PM (dYNX5)

74 I'll step up and defend the honor of Brian's Vagina!

Posted by: Frank G at April 15, 2009 06:07 PM (Aaspy)

75 Ah yes, and don't forget the ubiquitous Pink Taco.

Posted by: Fish at April 15, 2009 06:11 PM (CG+cG)

76 You mean boys leave my vagina alone!!!

Posted by: Brian at April 15, 2009 06:15 PM (mYbO7)

Posted by: Cindy at April 15, 2009 04:27 PM (kii7P)

Hey Cindy/ Brian/ Veronica/ Andros/ whoever-the-fuck-you-are: Where is your outrage at the pieces of shit with the "Palin Is A Cunt" shirts during the campaign? Hmm?

Die in a fire you worthless moby buttfucker.

Posted by: ol_dirty_/b/tard at April 15, 2009 06:16 PM (oHMhO)

78 *POOF!!!*

Posted by: Cindy the Man Cunt at April 15, 2009 07:02 PM (iafWn)

Here's a Susan fact:

She served as co-anchor on local New Orleans NBC affilitate, WDSU. The station is the most liberal news station in the greater New Orleans area. They have had a couple characters get in trouble with the law in recent years.

Roesgen's anchor, Norman Robinson, decided one night to drive drunk, flip his car, and piss right in front of the cops. He was welcomed back late last year.

Former WDSU sportscaster Vince Marinello is sitting in Angola State Prison for murdering his wife in a parking lot in Old Metairie.

Only the highest standards for New Orleans most leftist TV news team!

I'm betting money she voted for Nagin...twice.

Posted by: Pechon at April 15, 2009 07:17 PM (MM3Xh)

Whew, Cindy isn't a woman, that's a relief because that means I'm not a misogynist!

What a weird way to troll, I'm sorry I fell for it.

But, now I'm sad because Ace says he's just pretending to respect us women commenters. I guess that answers the age old question of whether he'll still respect me in the morning...

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at April 15, 2009 07:20 PM (AJ4xq)

81 Of course I'll respect your big vagina in the morning!

Posted by: Ace's Penis at April 15, 2009 07:27 PM (iafWn)

Posted by: Pechon at April 15, 2009 07:17 PM (MM3Xh)

Very intersting. Doesn't Rick "Dirty" Sanchez, who ran over and killed a man well driving drunk and fled the scene, work for CNN as well? They sure can pick 'em. I wonder what Cafferty has in his closet. He strikes me as the type of sick fuck who would dig up dead babies and molest their corpses.

Posted by: ol_dirty_/b/tard at April 15, 2009 07:29 PM (oHMhO)

83 @82: you don't know the half of it, ol_dirty...

Posted by: Zombie Baby at April 15, 2009 07:34 PM (iafWn)

84 I believe a little more respect for womyn is in order here. The VJJ does require a life-support system.

Posted by: bergerbilder at April 15, 2009 07:43 PM (r1aGg)

85 I'm I woman and I have found that I kind of like the guys that post here, they don't pull their punches when it comes to calling bullshit ,wither its from a man or a woman give me honesty any day of the week over all sweetness and light.

Posted by: Tee866 at April 15, 2009 07:46 PM (Vti3Z)

86 Ahem, Ace's Penis, you must've missed my post where I intimated that my vagina is sooo not big. Therefore, I can only assume that you are peanut size.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at April 15, 2009 07:55 PM (AJ4xq)

87 Limply Droops in Shame

Posted by: Ace's Penis

88 Wait, this was "Nips" Roesgen who ranted so unprofessionally? So named because of a costume malfunction while she was covering Mardi Gras from a balcony in the Quarter. IIRC, she was too lit to notice the slippage.

Posted by: Cybrludite at April 15, 2009 08:48 PM (PprNi)

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91
Great. Ace's droopy penis broke the blog...

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92 italics off

Posted by: toby928: Master of the Obvious and Irrelevant at April 16, 2009 11:45 AM (PD1tk)

93 hmm

Posted by: toby928: Master of the Obvious and Irrelevant at April 16, 2009 11:45 AM (PD1tk)

FYI, re: Susan Roesgen being a Big Vagina Lady, a conservative lesbian alleges that "Ace of Spades" is a vulgarism for a C U Next Teusday:

http://tinyurl.com/capjgr

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