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Oh For the Love of God: California May Ban Black Cars to Reduce "Global Warming"

See, black absorbs more sunlight and releases it as heat, yeah? And see then the car gets hot and you have to use your air conditioner, right? And that uses more fuel and you DESTROY THE FUCKING EARTH, see?

How ridiculous.

The problem isn’t the color per se, but the reflectivity of the paint overall. And dark colors just don’t reflect well, so they are likely out. “Jet black remains an issue,” says the report.

California long enjoyed a reputation for freedom. No longer. The Environmental Goons claim that freedom can no longer be tolerated, so great is the threat to our earth.

Thanks to Demure Thoughts. Who's blogging about animals that sorta look like vaginas.

Though, really, if your vagina looks like these creatures, you might want to have that checked out. You might need a course of Bactine and linament.

Colugo Monkey?

I admit that one's fun to say.

Posted by: Ace at 06:39 PM



Comments

1 Racists!

Someone had to say it.

Qwinn

Posted by: Qwinn at March 26, 2009 06:40 PM (/y1J0)

2 We can just paint the top of everything white.

Posted by: steevy at March 26, 2009 06:41 PM (sVWB4)

3 Black doesn't reflect. That's what makes it black.. ya know, like a shadow.

Posted by: ‘pinche migra! at March 26, 2009 06:42 PM (B6Fis)

4 I thought "once you went black..."

Posted by: red speck at March 26, 2009 06:45 PM (/vfpn)

5 O/T:  http://tinyurl.com/crhab9  ; font-style: italic;">This link is being sent around in emails.

Posted by: muffy at March 26, 2009 06:45 PM (zplc6)

6 Pity our gov'mt officials don't study thermodynamics and black-body behavior. Or anything else useful, for that matter.

The color the car appears to be to us with our eyes is not necessarily the color of the car "thermally". Fucking morons.

Posted by: Steamboat McGoo at March 26, 2009 06:45 PM (58OxE)

7 And, yet, there's at least half the populace that won't see this as completely fucking insane which makes me completely fucking insane.

Posted by: ECM at March 26, 2009 06:45 PM (q3V+C)

8 So, would people be allowed to drive their black cars at night? 

Or are they just tooooo dangerous that they can't be allowed to exist at all??!?!?!???

Posted by: Phinn at March 26, 2009 06:46 PM (X6sgq)

9 Barry gonna pimp out his new rides in Unicorn white?

Posted by: hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 06:46 PM (3N0/S)

10
Sure, as soon as Obama and Pelosi stops frivolously jettin' around and as soon as they paint all their shit white...

Posted by: Darling, just an entertainer at March 26, 2009 06:47 PM (j9pCc)

11 This will only create a black market for black cars.

Posted by: SlaveDog at March 26, 2009 06:47 PM (H6Jyg)

12 Where did all the smart people go?

Posted by: Captain Hate at March 26, 2009 06:47 PM (QizFO)

13 WTF? Am I gonna hafta trust the salesman about the color? And fuck you, I'm just as good a driver as anybody else out here!

Posted by: Helen Keller at March 26, 2009 06:48 PM (3N0/S)

14 Where did all the smart people go?

In Cali? Is this a trick question?

Posted by: ECM at March 26, 2009 06:48 PM (q3V+C)

15 "12 Where did all the smart people go?

Posted by: Captain Hate at March 26, 2009 06:47 PM (QizFO)"

I just started posting here so that is sort of an ominous commet to me.  Are there a lot of posters who have stopped posting?

Posted by: muffy at March 26, 2009 06:49 PM (zplc6)

16 Easy guy's. Imagine a sea of slowly moving white vehicles bumper to bumper on the expressway. It will look like rush hour in heaven.........only with me as your god instead.

Posted by: Barack Obama at March 26, 2009 06:51 PM (Vbxqy)

17 Why not require only white shingles on houses, then?

Posted by: nickless at March 26, 2009 06:52 PM (MMC8r)

18

When black cars are outlawed, only outlaws will have black cars.

Posted by: Jones at March 26, 2009 06:52 PM (KOkrW)

19 Drudge has the headline "FARGO NEARS RECORD FLOODING" and my knockout blonde friend who satisfies all the stereotypes just texted me "I love that show, is it back on now?"

Posted by: muffy at March 26, 2009 06:52 PM (zplc6)

20 Don't worry. All the black cars' heat generation will be offset by the Alanis Morrisette/Ed Norton "Big Turnoff" (or whatever the hell they're calling it) when people turn their lights off for an hour.

Hollywood saves us again!

Posted by: red speck at March 26, 2009 06:52 PM (/vfpn)

21 Aren't most roofs black?  Will they be next?  And, isn't this a clear case of discrimination?

Posted by: muffy at March 26, 2009 06:53 PM (zplc6)

22 Fuck you officer. This is Black Sapphire Metallic. The metallic reflects more sunlight than a white car. I have the NTSA Bulletin number 40761-A to prove it. On this Burger King wrapper.

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 06:54 PM (3N0/S)

23

I just started posting here so that is sort of an ominous commet to me.  Are there a lot of posters who have stopped posting?

Posted by: muffy at March 26, 2009 06:49 PM (zplc6)

Not to worry; it was aimed at the people running the asylum in Cali.

Posted by: Captain Hate at March 26, 2009 06:54 PM (QizFO)

24 >>Who's blogging about animals that sorta look like vaginas.

I'd hit 'em.

Oh what, like you wouldn't.

Posted by: JackStraw at March 26, 2009 06:56 PM (VW9/y)

25 Perhaps California should erect canopies over all public roads.

It's the only way to save Gaia!

Posted by: nickless at March 26, 2009 06:56 PM (MMC8r)

26 I heard this on Rush today and just laughed. What else can you do?
I wonder if the car restriction will extend to tourists. My family would drive to disneyland every winter in our black suv. I wonder if there will be a special tax on visitors with black vehicles.
Someone on Rush's show also asked about Hollywood and the limos.
Silliness, I tell you!

Posted by: Trish at March 26, 2009 06:57 PM (0U5Kd)

27 I remember in junior high school, we did a 'spearmint with 100-watt bulbs, thermometers, and water-filled styrofoam cups -- some of the cups left in their natural pristine whiteness, and some painted on the outside with black tempera paint. The point was to demonstrate that the black cups absorbed heat faster, but also cooled down faster once the external heat source (the light bulbs) was removed -- which is why the Space Shuttle's heat tiles are black, so that they'll shed heat better.

This is probably irrelevant to the black-car issue, but I'd be grateful if someone who remembers physics better can explain to me why.

Posted by: Throbert McGee at March 26, 2009 06:57 PM (w6H5X)

28 That does it. I'm off to Home Depot to buy a case of black Krylon, just to piss off the hippies. My 'stang is beat up anyway, it'll be fun.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at March 26, 2009 06:57 PM (yzuYS)

29

Global warming, overregulation, and vaginas, all in one post. Now that's multi-tasking!

Here's my effort in the same vein.

http://tinyurl.com/c58rxq

Soho S&M Club's Dominatrixes Used in Mortgage Scam

A former Suffolk County lawmaker and the owners of a Soho S&M club were among five people Suffolk County prosecutors accuse of running a $50 million mortgage scam. Suffolk DA Thomas Spota, after detailing how the group allegedly bought homes with fake buyers taking out huge mortgages (with forged documents), pocketed the money and then left the homes empty, said, "The damage these defendants single-handedly caused to the East End is simply appalling."

Apparently the group used had "straw buyers"—people who were paid to pose as buyers— to facilitate getting mortgages—and those people were recruited via S&M Club Arena Studios. Suffolk DA spokesman Robert Clifford explained, "Some of the straw buyers were patrons of the club and the dominatrixes approached them and asked if they wanted to make some easy money." The straw buyers were allegedly paid $10,000 by the group, who would use their info to get the loans. According to the Post, the prosecutors say the scam worked like this: "When a bank would sign off on the loans, the five defendants would just pocket the money, which went into accounts they controlled...After the bogus transactions were completed, the properties slipped into foreclosure."

 

These people should be whipped!

Posted by: flenser at March 26, 2009 06:57 PM (oFElx)

30

Will this apply to all cars? Will you get a pass if you drive a Prius? Will it be all motor vehicles? Tractor Trailers?

What about motorcycles. I want to see the "color police" stop 81 Hells Angels for having Black Harleys. These dickheads will be "blackjacked" over the fucking head for slowing them down.

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 06:58 PM (3N0/S)

31

Whew, and I thought I lived in the nuttiest place in the country. I imagine our state legislature perked right up when they heard about this. They are probably trying to figure out how to add a "black car tax" right now.

Posted by: ParanoidInSeattle at March 26, 2009 06:59 PM (AJ4xq)

32

 Why not require only white shingles on houses, then?

Stop giving them ideas.

Posted by: flenser at March 26, 2009 06:59 PM (oFElx)

33

God bless my dark blue Chevy truck, in the hottest hell of the Texas summer, and any puke who doesn't like it can kiss my big white Texas ass.

 

AC, ON!  Window down too.  Suckit, commies.

Posted by: Dave in Texas at March 26, 2009 07:00 PM (eiOZw)

34 This is probably irrelevant to the black-car issue, but I'd be grateful if someone who remembers physics better can explain to me why.

Because, as proved in our last election, black is just naturally coooool.

Posted by: nickless at March 26, 2009 07:00 PM (MMC8r)

35 I once had a 1971 Kawasaki 500...a 3 cylinder two stroke oil burning and oil belching rip snorting Japanese death machine that killed many a young round eye.

I, and many of my biker brethern, began global warming!

I painted it many layers of lacquer black to go with the environmentally destructive chrome ....and lived to brag to you guys about it.

I have a 1974 Triumph triple in my spare bedroom I'm working on and in honor of Globull Warming....I'm painting it lacquer black, to go with the chrome.

Praise Gaia! May her death be swift!

Posted by: torabora at March 26, 2009 07:00 PM (WZaJA)

36

Actually, Officer, due to quantum physics, the roof of my black car is also white. And anti-black. And it's also not here. Half the time.

 

Some would say that, as long as you don't look at the roof of my car, it doesn't even exist.

Posted by: Jones at March 26, 2009 07:00 PM (KOkrW)

37 Don't laugh about being forced to have rooftops with white shingles.   I heard an environmental group was working with Covergirl/ Cuckolded supermodel Christie Brinkley and she came up with the idea to paint rooftops white to reduce global warming.

Oprah said I give you your next President, my jr. senator from the couch near mine ... I thought that was a joke.   Environmental policy from Christie Brinkley is not a stretch now.   I dare say, time to invest in white paint?

Posted by: sis at March 26, 2009 07:02 PM (hm0CN)

38

#27 McGee. When I bought my last boat, I asked why the 502 ci was painted entirely black. The Mercruiser tech guy at the boat show explained that black does indeed dissipate internal heat better than any other color. Since the engine is not exposed to sunlight, black is the best color for this application.

Which backs up your thesis. 

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 07:03 PM (3N0/S)

39 6 Pity our gov'mt officials don't study thermodynamics and black-body behavior. Or anything else useful, for that matter.

They're lawyers.  There are two things that lawyers never learn: The law of thermodynamics and the law of unintended consequences.

Posted by: AmishDude at March 26, 2009 07:03 PM (T0NGe)

40 um, if that is the theory, should we outlaw black people then on beaches, i mean, cus, you know, they're black.....    silly retards....

Posted by: slizzle at March 26, 2009 07:06 PM (zG+3k)

41 Torabora, my helmet is off to you sir! You rode, and no doubt replaced pistons often, and lived to tell the tale. Good on you.

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 07:06 PM (3N0/S)

42

There are two things that lawyers never learn:

Three things.You can add the US Constituton to that list.

Posted by: flenser at March 26, 2009 07:07 PM (oFElx)

43 If I have to paint my dogsled white, just how the fuck am I supposed to find it in this frozen hell hole"

Huh? You gotta an answer for that nitwit?

Posted by: Sarah Palin at March 26, 2009 07:07 PM (WZaJA)

44 What about black tint, on a white car? Yeah, I know! Just tinkin' about loud here.

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 07:10 PM (3N0/S)

45 This business will get out of control. It will get out of control and we'll be lucky to live through it.

Posted by: jaleach at March 26, 2009 07:10 PM (gHrZU)

46
502 ci?

Remember when Cadillacs came with 500 ci engines?

Posted by: Darling, just an entertainer at March 26, 2009 07:11 PM (j9pCc)

47 In the bright sunlight of Cali, wouldn't a black car stand out (from a glare standpoint) a little better than a white one?

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 07:11 PM (3N0/S)

48

The fucking morons in Sacramento haven't figured out that it don't matter WTF your car's color is out here: EVERYONE has to have a/c in the summer. We're talking 95F being considered a mild day June day. Weeks of 100F plus. And don't get me started on Jul/Aug/Sep.

...and as if the fucking A/C had more to do with wasting gas then the fucking 5MPH rush hour "freeways" that cause a 10 mile commute to take two fucking hours.

Do something about that you cocksuckers, and you won't have to dick around with this kind of prissy non-science.

AAARGH!!!!!!!!!!

...the only people stupider than the people in Sacramento in this state ...are the dickwads who keep sending them to Sacramento.

 

Posted by: davis,br at March 26, 2009 07:12 PM (uCShA)

49 "Oprah said I give you your next President, my jr. senator from the couch near mine ... I thought that was a joke.   Environmental policy from Christie Brinkley is not a stretch now.   I dare say, time to invest in white paint?

Posted by: sis at March 26, 2009 07:02 PM (hm0CN)"

I'm getting tired of Oprah picking the President, I think the rest of us ought to have a chance next time.

Posted by: muffy at March 26, 2009 07:12 PM (zplc6)

50 Darling, my rich buddies parents had a '76 500ci coupe Devile, and they still have the '76 ElDorado Ragtop 500ci. With 33k. Bastards!

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 07:13 PM (3N0/S)

51 Fine. Then by their own logic, we need to get rid of BLACK PEOPLE AS WELL.

Fucking morons

Posted by: UncleFacts at March 26, 2009 07:14 PM (M+Vfm)

52 Hey Mr. davis...The stupid bastards sent ME to Washington!

Posted by: Nancy Pelosi at March 26, 2009 07:14 PM (WZaJA)

53 Will these morons then close the borders to black vehicles?  Doubly bad if I show up in a black, soot-blowin' diesel truck?

Posted by: apb at March 26, 2009 07:15 PM (4Ac/Q)

54 Why not require only white shingles on houses, then?

Stop giving them ideas.

Then point out the color of solar panels, step back and watch their heads explode.

Posted by: Heorot at March 26, 2009 07:15 PM (LIbYC)

55 12 Where did all the smart people go?

Sorry to say, we're what's left sweetheart.

Global warming is the result of de-evolution.

/how long before there is a tax on overweight people because they use too much oxygen and are killing mother Gaia? You know it's coming. I'm talking to you west coast....

Posted by: shibumi at March 26, 2009 07:16 PM (tZB/c)

56 The dumbshits sent me to Washington too! All expenses paid and lot$$$$ of graft for my loving husband.

Posted by: Diane Fiendsteen at March 26, 2009 07:16 PM (WZaJA)

57 ...and don't I fuckin' know it, you bitter backstabbing base bitch

Posted by: davis,br at March 26, 2009 07:16 PM (uCShA)

58 what happens if you are a black person in a black car?  Does this cause some sort of rip in the space/time continuum? Does this mean all the cali rappers have to turn in their black bentley's and escalades for a white one?   This does smack of "soft bigotry"

It amuses me nonetheless.

Posted by: Jennifer at March 26, 2009 07:17 PM (4xBEr)

59 You know, with all of the problems that California  is facing these days, this is what they are f**king worried about? They're hopeless

Posted by: rian at March 26, 2009 07:17 PM (i9UrF)

60
I'm not a nukular surgeon but I'll bet that the addition of a single nuclear power plant in the U.S. will have a far far far far greater "green" impact than painting every single car in the U.S. white.

And this is what the GOP needs to do: compare the stupid Obama/California "green" policies with the economic and environmental advantages of nuclear power plants, coal, and domestic oil.

Posted by: Darling, just an entertainer at March 26, 2009 07:17 PM (j9pCc)

61 Nothing is sweeter than black, hand rubbed, Lacquer. Sniff. (not huff, sniff as in bummer)

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 07:18 PM (3N0/S)

62 Sometimes when I see the goofy shit we do here in CA, I think we are the dumbest state in the Union... then I realize that's not even close to true, and it makes me sad and a little scared.

Posted by: Terry at March 26, 2009 07:18 PM (nyxv/)

63 /how long before there is a tax on overweight people because they use too much oxygen and are killing mother Gaia? You know it's coming. I'm talking to you west coast....

Actually you could argue that obese people have shorter lives and therefor are BETTER for gaia, right?  Twinkies for everyone! heh

Posted by: Jennifer at March 26, 2009 07:18 PM (4xBEr)

64

Actually, colugos are not monkeys.  They are also called "flying lemurs," but are not primates at all but rather belong to their own order, Dermaptera ("skin wing").

At least that's the order they were in in my old Life nature books when I was a kid.

Posted by: logprof at March 26, 2009 07:19 PM (tjUml)

65 I'm from New York and these stupid SOB's even sent me to Washington.

Posted by: Barbara Boxer at March 26, 2009 07:20 PM (WZaJA)

66 What about blacktop? Asphalt? Tarpaper roofs?
or... or... no, not going to say it.
 
Torabora - an H2? Someone tried to teach me to ride with one - not a learner's bike. Boo-h00-rutal.

Posted by: Ktnxbai at March 26, 2009 07:20 PM (SOqNs)

67 So, another guy on Kudlow saying "the banks are lending". 

Posted by: muffy at March 26, 2009 07:20 PM (zplc6)

68

i'll think of california every time i start my turbo 1972 emissions exempt datsun 510. if their was only a way it could pour out any more noxious toxic earth destroying gases then it already does, i would have found it.

Posted by: unamerican hate mongering evil libertarian at March 26, 2009 07:20 PM (2J+Vs)

69 Oh, and while I'm really fucking het up;

You gaia worshiping fascists about to celebrate your fucking "Earth Hour"?

I am single-handedly going to do everything in my power to wipe out whatever measly pissant gains you get from your stupid antics.

I'm turning on every damned light on in my house, I filled the tahoe with gas and am gonna let that fucker just idle the whole tank till it's dry.

And while my electric meter is melting itself to its bearing shaft, I'm lighting all these worn out tires I've been saving on fire in my backyard, while I dance fucking naked around them like a wild earth destroying injun!

And woe to any eco-fuck that comes on my property while this celebration is in full swing. Just because your body is mostly water, doesn't mean all that fat in your lilly white ass won't burn on that tire fire.

Posted by: UncleFacts at March 26, 2009 07:21 PM (M+Vfm)

70 "Well officer, I don't know my cars well, but the fucker who robbed and beat me was driving a white, midsize sedan".

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 07:21 PM (3N0/S)

71 I was ahead of my time. Too sad.

Do you think you could let me out? I could help out your Global Warming problem...

Posted by: Charles Manson at March 26, 2009 07:24 PM (WZaJA)

72 36

Actually, Officer, due to quantum physics, the roof of my black car is also white. And anti-black. And it's also not here. Half the time.Some would say that, as long as you don't look at the roof of my car, it doesn't even exist.

I'm sorry sir and/or madam, but you've actually demonstrated much too much sassy intelligence, and for this you must be punished. The Authorities will be coming for you and your family soon for immediate re-education that will involve the kind of things they did to the Kennedy daughter you never, ever saw. In the end, your neurons will not fire, and you will be a democrat.

-thanks, the Obama Thought Police

Posted by: shibumi at March 26, 2009 07:24 PM (tZB/c)

73 I'm looking on the bright side here!!!

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 07:24 PM (3N0/S)

74 Why not require only white shingles on houses, then?

Actually, I'm pretty sure that this idea has been kicked around.

I also plan to celebrate Earth Hour by using every bit of energy that I can. 

Posted by: alexthechick at March 26, 2009 07:24 PM (nLryO)

75 Earth day is right around the corner gents.

Posted by: Gaia at March 26, 2009 07:25 PM (WZaJA)

76 I really try to stay upbeat.The constant insanity and bad news makes it very very difficult.Every fuckin day day,carbon cap and trade,massive deficit spending,massive tax increases massive fucking stupidity!!

Posted by: steevy at March 26, 2009 07:25 PM (sVWB4)

77 if their was only a way it could pour out any more noxious toxic earth destroying gases then it already does, i would have found it.

Straight pipes. Throw away that pussy muffler and catalytic.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at March 26, 2009 07:26 PM (yzuYS)

78 Hopefully these really committed assholes will hold their breath for the whole hour.

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 07:26 PM (3N0/S)

79 So a light colored vagina reflects heat better? Or am I missing the point of this post?

Posted by: joh at March 26, 2009 07:27 PM (1DPb/)

80 Anybody want to run a test on the absorptive differential between jet black and, say, dark red?

Posted by: nickless at March 26, 2009 07:28 PM (MMC8r)

81

So, would people be allowed to drive their black cars at night? 

Only if I am allowed to wear my sunglasses at night.

Posted by: Cobalt Shiva at March 26, 2009 07:28 PM (5bBMH)

82 So we paint cars black to make them use, say, 2 percent less energy while the air conditioning is on, which is what, 25 percent of the time in So. Cal? So if the average person drives 1 1/2 hours per day, that's .02 x .25 x 1.25 x 365 = a savings of 1.8 hours worth of energy per year, or about, say, four gallons of gas per black car that is painted white.

Without looking up the CO2 output for autos, even if you are dumb enough to believe in Glowball Warming, the annual savings from this stupidity is probably eclipsed in about the first minute or two of new coal-fired power production from India and China.

And California wonders why everyone is fleeing and businesses are closing.

Posted by: Fresh Air at March 26, 2009 07:30 PM (YRmTE)

83 Actually you could argue that obese people have shorter lives

People in the "overweight" 25-30 BMI* range live longer on average than those in the "healthy" 18.5-25 range.  Plus, we're famine resistant--people who truly believe that the parts of the country that aren't under ocean water will become desert wastelands should find that a plus.

* Yes, BMI is just a height-weight chart that has jack-all to do with measuring health.

Posted by: HeatherRadish at March 26, 2009 07:30 PM (WocgN)

84

What do you expect from the state that continues to reelect intellectual pygmies like pelosi.

Posted by: The Great Satan™ at March 26, 2009 07:31 PM (OP845)

85 Since light enters the vehicle through the windows, they should be replaced with one-way mirrors to bounce the light away before it enters the car and causes a greenhouse effect.

I'm sure that will sound like a great idea to some green bureaucrat.

Posted by: nickless at March 26, 2009 07:33 PM (MMC8r)

86

My sister likes black dudes.  She thinks they are hot, and, apparently, she was on to something.

Posted by: gator at March 26, 2009 07:35 PM (yUiO3)

87 So, being the dick I am, I think I be painting every Hybrid with black grill paint. If the windows are open, I'll do the inside too.

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 07:36 PM (3N0/S)

88

502? What was it pushing, hutch?

A couple years ago a buddy and I bought a 18' 1959 Squall King for a rebuild, deepest fucking 18 footer you ever seen with a hull that was solid as a rock.

Anywho, he wanted to put in a Crate 302 racing engine and straight shaft it out like a ski boat. He also wanted to paint the whole boat flat black and I told him that was stupid because on a sunny day on the water, we'd die of heatstroke.

Shoulda checked into that Black Sapphire Metallic. That would REALLY piss off our fellow boaters.

 

Posted by: ErikW at March 26, 2009 07:36 PM (hKtiw)

89 So, in the winter when black cars are absorbing all that heat while the white cars aren't and its drivers need to crank up the heater (directly contributing to global warming without bothering to go through the intermediary of atmospheric compounds), do we invert the law enforced by the Car Paint Police?

Good Lord, California is full of stupid.

Maybe Californian Greenies can solicit Montgomery Burns to construct a giant shade to cover the state. Sure, he supposedly lives in Springfield, but I bet he can be found wandering the FOX studios in Hollywood.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at March 26, 2009 07:36 PM (swuwV)

90 Black/White..East Coast/West Coast...why we gotta be all like that?

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 07:37 PM (3N0/S)

91

My sister likes black dudes.  She thinks they are hot, and, apparently, she was on to something.

 

Yea, well,..... my sister wear's lipstick. Too much lipstick in fact. Some people say she look's like a whore.

Posted by: Guy in police station at March 26, 2009 07:40 PM (Vbxqy)

92 ErikW, I have a 26' Powerquest Legend SX. Sorta like a Offshore style, super strong hull. My dry hull  weighs 500 lbs more than a Baja 272 (same length, but a taller cuddy), but a MUCH stronger hull. Bajas' suck. Every one of my friends had to send their boats back to the factory w/in 4 years for defect repair. Which never worked out. Yeah, I run high 60's in any water, but in the smooth stuff they ease past me. They have a shallower V. Definitely don't mind barely losing for that!

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 07:44 PM (3N0/S)

93

My sister wears black lipstick.  Emo as hell.
And, yes, her kisses were smoking hot.  So I hear.

Posted by: gator at March 26, 2009 07:45 PM (yUiO3)

94 Yea, well,..... my sister wear's lipstick. Too much lipstick in fact. Some people say she look's like a whore.

Oh really.

Posted by: Jeanie....but my friends call me Shauna at March 26, 2009 07:46 PM (MMC8r)

95 Long thread on the CARB proposal over at www.thetruthaboutcars.com. Comments divideamong those who think if its the gubmint and means more laws, its good! and those who don't think that at all and those who think that to evaluate it on its merits you ought to have some objective tests of alternatives. There's a link to a pathetic pdf presentation by CARB in which they admit they assume that using the special paint has about 1/7th the effect of treating the glass. The contents of the pdf would get you a C- in your sophomore engineering lab presentation.

Posted by: chuckR at March 26, 2009 07:52 PM (khYRZ)

96 California is rapidly reaching the point of no return in its descent into a pure parody of itself.

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 26, 2009 07:53 PM (iafWn)

97 Is it true that everyone in California who can is moving to other states?  Heard it is just too damned expensive to live there.

Posted by: muffy at March 26, 2009 07:54 PM (zplc6)

98 "63 /how long before there is a tax on overweight people because they use too much oxygen and are killing mother Gaia? You know it's coming. I'm talking to you west coast....

Actually you could argue that obese people have shorter lives and therefor are BETTER for gaia, right?  Twinkies for everyone! heh

Posted by: Jennifer at March 26, 2009 07:18 PM (4xBEr)"

I know, I heard the lobby for the personal trainers is pushing that one big time.

Posted by: muffy at March 26, 2009 07:56 PM (zplc6)

99 83 Actually you could argue that obese people have shorter lives

People in the "overweight" 25-30 BMI* range live longer on average than those in the "healthy" 18.5-25 range.  Plus, we're famine resistant--people who truly believe that the parts of the country that aren't under ocean water will become desert wastelands should find that a plus.

* Yes, BMI is just a height-weight chart that has jack-all to do with measuring health.

I was being facetious and you are right but in Cali a BMI over say, 3 is considered Obese,right? 

Posted by: Jennifer at March 26, 2009 07:56 PM (4xBEr)

100

Some would say that, as long as you don't look at the roof of my car, it doesn't even exist.

Posted by: Jones at March 26, 2009 07:00 PM (KOkrW)


A dude named Heisenberg would be proud of your non-observance. H was principled that way, if you know what I mean. In a particular kind of way...

Posted by: enter sandman at March 26, 2009 07:57 PM (zxaA2)

101 This is further proof that Californians don't deserve California. The California coastline is as beautiful as anywhere in the world, there are gorgeous beaches, great mountains, massive forests.....and the most gallingly fucking stupid people on the planet.

Posted by: UGAdawg at March 26, 2009 07:58 PM (MDHAs)

102

My God! If they outlaw black stretch limos, then there will only be WHITE stretch limos.

Everyone in California knows that white stretch limos mean only one of two things: a drug dealer or a drag queen.

Posted by: Scott at March 26, 2009 08:01 PM (HzhkR)

103 @101: think of the bright side: if it weren't for California, they'd be living in YOUR neck of the woods.

Which, come to think of it, I often think when driving thru a bad part of town...

Posted by: CoolCzech at March 26, 2009 08:01 PM (iafWn)

104

When black cars are outlawed, only outlaws will have black cars.

Only outlaws should have black cars.

All you pussies drive pink cars, from now on!

Posted by: Entropy at March 26, 2009 08:03 PM (cok/k)

105 That settles it.  Not that I really wanted or needed any more proof, but I live in the STUPIDEST STATE IN THE COUNTRY!    There is no legislative body that can equal the abject vapidity of Sacramento.  I can't even think of a runner up! (with the possible exception of the Berkely City Council, though I don't really consider local municipalities to be on the same playing field)  I mean sure, Illinois has Blago the Daley crowd, but at least they're merely corrupt and immoral.... not TOTAL FRIGGIN IDIOTS!!  I would actually trade the California state legislature for that of Illinois. How pathetic is that?  I can't believe I'm actually typing this, and that I honestly mean it!

I would rather have the lamest Morons on this blog in a trancendental Valu-rite stupor running the show in Sacramento. At least then I would be able to sleep at night...
 
 


Posted by: Scott in OC at March 26, 2009 08:05 PM (b8itK)

106 So I now have something to do during Earth Hour on Sunday.
I will fire up my 1968 Olds 442, non-emission, 400ci, leaded fuel (I put super no-lead in it and then a lead additive) car. It's Jade Gold (which is a super dark green, almost black). I will park it outside to get extra warm, fire it up, glory in it's leaded exhaust goodness and then turn on the A/C.
Good Times.

Posted by: jubal anderson early at March 26, 2009 08:05 PM (krKUp)

107 i think we should move John Wayne's grave to another state.  he sure wouldn't like this.

Posted by: kelley in virginia at March 26, 2009 08:06 PM (g568/)

108 104

When black cars are outlawed, only outlaws will have black cars.

Only outlaws should have black cars.

All you pussies drive pink cars, from now on!



Does that mean the California Highway Patrol will paint all their cars bright pink?

Posted by: kbdabear at March 26, 2009 08:11 PM (miw86)

109

hutch, my congrats on the sweet ride!

I agree, Baja's aren't much more than a muscled up Bayliner. Looks like you made a great purchase!

Posted by: ErikW at March 26, 2009 08:12 PM (hKtiw)

110 <now searching Ebay for a deal on sackcloth and ashes, hoping to buy from  somewhere out of state>

Posted by: Scott in OC at March 26, 2009 08:12 PM (b8itK)

111 Sacramento just added another 20 weeks to unemployment benefits. The way they're running things, I might need all of them.

Posted by: kbdabear at March 26, 2009 08:12 PM (miw86)

112 <contemplating a grassroots effort to recall Arnie and replace him with Blago>

Posted by: Scott in OC at March 26, 2009 08:13 PM (b8itK)

113 <wondering if I die of embarrassment from living in California, if the state will allow my family to bury me in a black coffin>

Posted by: Scott in OC at March 26, 2009 08:16 PM (b8itK)

114

I guess that all the other problems that we have here in the formerly Golden State have been resolved. Now they are working on the important issues.

Worthless cockholsters.

Posted by: Braineaterbob at March 26, 2009 08:16 PM (PIxQ5)

115 #68 - put on the larger 240Z head and twin Mikuni carbs. Yes, I had a Datsun 510, and loved it, and it loved me ...*sob*

Posted by: Frank G at March 26, 2009 08:16 PM (Aaspy)

116

     I vaguely remember reading about 30 years ago where somebody experimented with different colors to see what would be the best color for a solar panel.  They determined it was a shade darker than leaf green.  That makes sense when you consider plants.  There probably isn't much difference though, after all plants come in many colors. 

If it's all about how hot things feel that's important, shouldn't they also ban leather car seats?  I'm sure they'd all be happy to give up those.  Not to mention the seat heaters. And heated toilet seats.  And heated towel racks.  And bottom-heated floors.

To be consistent they'd also have to require sun-block on everybody outside.  Tans would be a misdemeanor.  Pale-white will be the new black.

Anyways, isn't the whole idea a result of being ignorant of physics?  First Law of Thermodynamics.  Anyone?  Anyone?  Ahnold?  You know, If the radiant heat from the sun doesn't heat up the car, it's just going to heat up the ground.  It's not like a car body magically creates heat...  And I'm preaching to other preachers, sorry.  

Posted by: Publicserf at March 26, 2009 08:27 PM (AWxgw)

117 Sounds like a good time to start hoarding brunette lace wigs.

Posted by: Kurt at March 26, 2009 08:30 PM (RBij8)

118

That's what we need. An object, preferably internal combustion powered, that we let slip away thread. Fuck ACEs'..lost babe post.

When I bought my boat (thanx for concurring erikw), the Mrs mad me sell my 1966 Buick Gran Sport, 401, Ragtop. Original red/black top and gut. It took my 5 years to restore, and many junkyard trips. Which are cool in themselves. I sold it for what I had in the motor....I need a tissue..later.

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 08:31 PM (3N0/S)

119

"Hi, I'm hutch, and I sold my '69 GTX when I went into the Air Force"

"Hi hutch".

"I was a dumbass, thought I'd be able to find another one, in better shape, maybe less money...but 4 years later all I had was a bad haircut and no musclecar.".

HUGS all around, coffee and sugar cookies etc. 

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 08:37 PM (3N0/S)

120 I guess that means Cali will have to resurface all their roads with white asphalt and all tires will have to be white? You know, because their blackiness absorbs too much heat, 'n stuf.

Posted by: George at March 26, 2009 08:37 PM (k6WD6)

121 What does that reporterette I always hear on the radio, usually during Rush,  called "Anne from Compton" have to say about this?

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 08:40 PM (3N0/S)

122 What,,,her Name IS Ann Compton? Oh. I wondered why they gave a shit about her. I always thought they said "Live Ann from Compton"....Sorry.

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 08:45 PM (3N0/S)

123

If it makes you feel better, the Squall King still sits in dry dock after extensive cost/benefit analyses. I still get all melancholy when I receive the West Marine Master Catalogue.

Posted by: ErikW at March 26, 2009 08:49 PM (hKtiw)

124 A black roof is useful in climates with more cold weather because it helps to heat the house during the day. In warm climates it helps dissipate heat at night. Ideally you want shutters so that the white low absorption surface is facing the sun and the black high emissivity surface faces the night.

If you live in a hot desert climate there would be benefits from a high emissivity low adsorption paint on the roof, but you would have to keep it clean which would waste water. Probably cheaper to just add another inch of insulation in the attic and instal a ventilation fan.

Posted by: Bill at March 26, 2009 08:50 PM (LZSir)

125 There is something in the air in Ca. I think it was classified as insanity back in the 1700's. Maybe the fault will get active and we'll lose all of the nuts in Ca. Three cheers for a major earthquake.

Posted by: Scrapiron at March 26, 2009 08:59 PM (1kwr2)

126 I so can't wait till the big one where Kaleeforneea and the rest of the Left Coast falls off into the Pacific and Vegas becomes beachfront property.  Here's to the demise of San Fransicko and all the libtard fart sniffing in brandy snifter assholes that go with it.

Posted by: John Adams at March 26, 2009 09:03 PM (cWg6W)

127 ErikW, I shit myself when the Overtons Catalog comes. My boys can't understand why I won't buy a $3800 inflatible island with a slide. The fucking thing would take a diesel mechanics compressor 2 hours to inflate! I have to keep the rpms @ 1100 so both batteries can run 2 small compressors now!

Posted by: Hutch1200 at March 26, 2009 09:05 PM (3N0/S)

Posted by: ceaecw at March 26, 2009 09:06 PM (YRTmg)

129  what would we do with White Limos after Labor Day? * I cringe*

Posted by: Frank G at March 26, 2009 09:29 PM (Aaspy)

130 Hey now, there is a silver lining to this cloud of Stupid.  The Global Warming crowd has just tacitly acknowledged the involvement of that giant ball of plasma in the sky in heating up the Earth.  Which is something they've been loathe to do for very obvious reasons for almost two decades.  Now is the time to call them on it.

Posted by: J. Wilde at March 26, 2009 09:30 PM (ucJiT)

131 Fine. Then by their own logic, we need to get rid of BLACK PEOPLE AS WELL.

They can stay if they agree to wear white face. But no more eating blackened catfish outdoors.

Posted by: lmg at March 26, 2009 09:34 PM (A/vgC)

132

Hutch, you should get a black market Kite Tube!

Greatest water toy ever! If you need to figure out a quick-release on the sunuvabitch, you know it's fun!

I just now subscribed to Overton's. I can't wait!

 

Posted by: ErikW at March 26, 2009 09:42 PM (hKtiw)

133 What color is the VRWC going to paint all of those helicopters now?

Posted by: Roy at March 26, 2009 09:48 PM (oGx8y)

134
You. . . .f**king. . . idiots.

How much extra albedo are you going to add to the PLANET by eliminating a few black cars in CA?  0.000000000000000001%??  The effect wouldn't even be measureable, let alone noticeable.

If the heat isn't absorbed by the black car paint it will be absorbed by the black tarmac the car is riding on. . .or something else.

And just MAYBE people would appreciate that trivial amount of extra heat in the WINTER.

Forgive me for being "cynical", but is there any way this is just another hare-brained scheme to raise tax money for the perpetually bankrupt Republik of Kalifornia?

Posted by: looking closely at March 26, 2009 10:09 PM (KNy97)

135 128 - Does a Russian Mail Order Bride come with the wedding dresses?

Posted by: Evil Elvis at March 26, 2009 10:58 PM (miw86)

136

OK - Calm down. You people really have missed the point totally. This is California. They don't DO thinks for actual reality. They DO things to make them feel better about themselves.

They don't understand physics, or life for that matter, it's all just so unfair, which is why they need government to make everything fair. Everybody can only be as smart as the dumbest person, or as rich as the poorest person, because they can't have anybody feel bad. When they can't compete intellectually, they come up with plans to save the planet. That's what pretend geniuses do.

If you feel bad about neglecting the planet by jetsetting with your friends on your private plane and having your illegal immigrant babysitter driving your SUV while working for $4/hr- Problem solved - just turn off your lights for an hour. The darkness shouldn't bother you - your hold freakin life has been in the dark.

It's not about global warming. It's not about blackness. It's not about thinking at fucking all.

#69 - UncleFacts - funniest post I have read in weeks. I want pictures.

Posted by: Carmelita at March 26, 2009 11:12 PM (gq1Fx)

137

"They don't do thinks" - should stopped there - and two martinis ago.

Posted by: Carmelita at March 26, 2009 11:14 PM (gq1Fx)

138 Speaking of Black and Commiefornia...in Oakland today they marched IN SUPPORT of the monster that murdered the 4 cops. The spokesmonster said that cops murder blacks every day.

savages

Posted by: Gaia at March 26, 2009 11:23 PM (WZaJA)

139 I'm going for the new Toyota Prius which claims only 50 mpg but has been tested at 90 mpg. Color doesn't matter to me, but I've never wanted a black one because it does get hotter inside.

Posted by: RRowdy at March 26, 2009 11:54 PM (D2t2Y)

140

Anyone knows that black cars show less dirt.  So, when everyone has a light colored car they will wash them more.  Especially in CA where looks are everything.  So, the already depleted water supply will deplete even more.  So there's that... in addition to the fact that this is just plain ass dumb anyway.

Posted by: SalvucciFumbles at March 27, 2009 12:49 AM (YpFxG)

141

#136 Carmelita  "They DO things to make them feel better about themselves."

Oh, so California is a feminine state.  That's why they aren't too good at solving problems, they're too busy focusing on their feelings.  It might also explain their current financial condition as the result of a need to spend money to feel good.  Therefore, what California needs is a good bitch-slapping.  That wouldn't help them with any of their problems, but it would make ME feel better. 

Posted by: publicserf at March 27, 2009 01:17 AM (AWxgw)

142 claims only 50 mpg but has been tested at 90 mpg.

Going downhill?

Posted by: Purple Avenger at March 27, 2009 01:26 AM (ysoZG)

143

 I filled the tahoe with gas and am gonna let that fucker just idle the whole tank till it's dry.

And while my electric meter is melting itself to its bearing shaft, I'm lighting all these worn out tires I've been saving on fire in my backyard, while I dance fucking naked around them like a wild earth destroying injun!

What I think would kill two endangered birds with one piece of Mother Earth would be to put the old tires on the Tahoe, lay down a little bleach or waste oil, and do some drifting. Lots of fun and it either delights or pisses off the neighbors.

The poor cooling qualities of my 3rd generation Firebird make running it in idle a bad idea. I will however turn on all the lights, make sure the tv and computer are on, run the appliances.

If I had the money to spare, I'd go rent a ZR-1 Corvette with the supercharged 638 hp 6.3 litre engine and mash the throttle to the floor.

Posted by: kbdabear at March 27, 2009 01:30 AM (7FgWm)

144 Will they give breaks to people who don't wash their black cars much? Thanks to not having a garage, it makes no sense to wash my truck much given mother gaia's wonderous tree sap/pollen and dust build up. A mere two days after a wash and I've got a nice thin layer of pollen building up in the spring and summer.

Posted by: JS at March 27, 2009 02:00 AM (geqYz)

145 kda, I may do some tire shredding burnouts as a preliminary warmup to the actual earth desecreation.

I'm in need of some new meats for the Anti-AlGore Mobile.

And no, I will not be paying the $2 per tire charge to recycle them.

They're made of fuckin carbon, I'm just going to liberate all that captured carbon back to its natural state! Wild and free!

RUN CARBONS RUN!

Posted by: UncleFacts at March 27, 2009 02:05 AM (M+Vfm)

Posted by: 13times at March 27, 2009 04:17 AM (X002z)

147 Late on the thread. Anyone living in the desert or semi-arid western states. Use a swamp cooler, open the hatch/lid leading to the attic and pump that moist cool air through the house and up/out into the super-heated attic airspace. This will reduce head transfer from composite roof to the living space below.

Do this all day while at work, swamp coolers are dirt cheap to run - if you hate the humidity created by the swamp cooler then switch it off when arriving home from work and crank up the AC.


Posted by: 13times at March 27, 2009 04:27 AM (X002z)

148

The poor cooling qualities of my 3rd generation Firebird .. are compensated for by the overall bitchin-ass awesomeness of the car.

FIFY.

Posted by: Entropy at March 27, 2009 08:33 AM (m6c4H)

149 Gah. I can't remember enough details to google.. anyone remember an article on some blog about the guy who was celebrating earth hour or whatever it was where you're suppose to turn everything off for an hour, sitting out in a lawn chair and spray-painting some slogan on his lawn but he ran out of space to spell the whole thing?

Posted by: Entropy at March 27, 2009 08:38 AM (m6c4H)

150 So African Americans are politically incorrect now because they cause more global warming than white people? So everything in Cali must be white because it is the least environmentally unfriendly color (or sum of colors)?
Black power is passe now?
Really these loons in Cali should just be sawed off and left adrift in the Pacific.
But we may laugh now, but this is exactly what we can expect from the Obama Administration and its leftwing thugs.

Posted by: eaglewingz08 at March 27, 2009 10:25 AM (RdRrk)

151 California Bans Black Cars?

Right.  When they pry my five-speed shifter from my cold, dead right hand.

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Posted by: replica watches at February 04, 2010 11:15 AM (CPNio)

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Posted by: replica watches at February 06, 2010 07:14 PM (KbTNE)

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Posted by: replica watches at February 07, 2010 08:29 AM (TUJDt)

Posted by: Jastika Weblog at February 08, 2010 09:25 PM (pB/4p)






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