You're Nobody Until You've Been Banned in a Muslim Country

This is interesting news. Ever wonder why an Islamic Government might have a problem with the content here at the AoSHQ? I mean, yeah, I can understand banning the Jawas, what with their irrational need to NOT be killed by some of the nuttier adherents of the Religion of Peace, but why ban Ace?

Then I had an epiphany. This might be why we're banned in Turkey. Or maybe this. Possibly this.

(all links SFW, unless you're working for PETA)

I need to apologize to my co-bloggers. My pork obsession has deprived the AoSHQ of badly needed ad revenue at the same time PJM is throwing all their bloggers to the wolves and circling the financial wagons. I'm sure that Turkish readers would have been good for another $3 or $4 a month in ad revenue. I swear I'll make it up to you guys. Will you take a check? Oh yeah, and you might want to wait a week or two before cashing it.

Hat tips all around to The Jawa Report, Instapundit (Amazon link), Hot Air, and AoSHQ regular Murph in Nevada. Other bacon-related news in the extended entry:

Contacts:
News Release
Brooks Reynolds – 515-865-8078
Mindy Toyne - 515-371-4742
Jeff Bruning - 515-554-9535

Second Annual Blue Ribbon Bacon Festival Grows To Accommodate Demand
Event celebrates bacon with 7 course menu, lecture, bacon eating contest & more

January 14, 2009 (Des Moines, IA) – Organizers of the first ever Blue Ribbon Bacon Festival were blown away last year when the 180 person event sold out over night. This year’s event, presented by metromix, will accommodate 280 bacon lovers and offer at least 13 varieties of bacon for sampling.

“We were overwhelmed by the response to our inaugural event last year.” Said Brooks Reynolds, whose passion for bacon was the driving force behind the creation of the event. “We want to accommodate all bacon fans by increasing the capacity this year. It thrills me to know how many true bacon fanatics are out there!” he added.

At least 13 different bacon purveyors will be on-site at the event sampling their bacon including Vande Rose Farms, Iowa Farm Family, Hormel, Tiefenthaler Quality Meats, Applegate Farms, Coastal Vineyards from California and Django.

Last year, the guest who traveled the longest distance to attend the event was a man who goes by Mr. Baconpants from Pittsburgh. This year he will return with a film crew to document the event for his website dedicated to “all things bacon” www.mrbaconpants.com. Other websites who have featured the Blue Ribbon Bacon Festival include www.baconunwrapped.com and www.baconfreak.com. Jeff Bruning, co-owner of the High Life Lounge and el Bait Shop was also interviewed on Sirius Satellite Radio and several other national radio shows as the event struck a chord with many bacon fans.

The Second Annual Blue Ribbon Bacon Festival, presented by metromix, will be held on Saturday February 28 at the High Life Lounge and el Bait Shop – 200 SW 2nd - Downtown Des Moines from 10am – 4pm. Cost for the event is $32.50 and space is limited to 280 bacon fans. Entry fee includes a commemorative t-shirt, bacon bracelet, a menu of 7 bacon items, one free drink, unlimited samples at the Bacon Showcase, and a seat in the “Baconology part II” lecture.

February 28 is the eve of National Pig Day, which was started by Texas art teacher Ellen Stanley in 1972 to honor and give thanks to “our most intelligent domesticated creature.”

Schedule of Events [Bacon Showcase open throughtout event]
10:00 a.m. Registration - Bacon Bloody Marys are served
11:00 a.m. Bacon Invocation
11:15 a.m. 1st Bacon Lecture “Baconolgy part II”
12:30 pm. 2nd Bacon Lecture
1:00 p.m. Frozen Hosen on the patio [Free Beer on the patio while it lasts!]
2:00 p.m. 3rd Bacon Lecture
3:30 Bacon Eating Contest

Menu (will be served in a flighted fashion throughout the day)
Bacon & Egg breakfast sandwich
Bacon Lettuce & Tomato sandwich
Bacon Cheeseburger Slider
Bacon wrapped Hot Dog
Candied Bacon Ice Cream
2 additional items, which will be revealed the day of the event
Facts
What – Second Annual Blue Ribbon Bacon Festival presented by Metromix
When – Saturday, February 28 10 am – 4 pm
Where – el Bait Shop & High Life Lounge – 200 SW 2nd Street – Downtown Des Moines
Cost - $32.50 Entry includes a commemorative t-shirt, bacon bracelet, a menu of 7 bacon items, unlimited samples at the Bacon Showcase, a seat in the Baconology part II lecture and one drink. All entrants will also be eligible for bacon prizes.
Registration – Space is limited to 280 participants. Tickets are only available at www.iowatix.com
Website – www.blueribbonbaconfestival.com
Sponsors for the Blue Ribbon Bacon Festival include Metromix, Pabst Blue Ribbon, In Any Event, NCP Investment Banking, el Bait Shop & Pearl Vodka.
Café Di Scala will be hosting a bacon inspired dinner on Feb. 25th. Chef/Owner Tony Lemmo will be serving a five course meal that will tantalize your taste buds. Pearl Vodka and Templeton Rye will be serving a bacon themed cocktail to go along with Tony's menu. Seats are limited to 40 people. Please respond to this email if you would like to attend. Seats are $75 per person.
Link to metromix.com - http://desmoines.metromix.com/restaurants/blog_post/bacon-fest-tickets-on/893305/content
Link to Iowatix.com - http://www.iowatix.com/WebSales/Pages/VenueListPage.aspx?rguid=3825c690-3319-4ea4-b172-477eb0247fe7&
Link to Café di Scala - www.cafediscala.com

Brought to you by the Iowa Bacon Board – Brooks Reynolds, Marshall Porter, Seth Hall, Kevin Tiffany, John Tiffany, Jeff Bruning, Mindy Toyne and Brad Proctor.
###

Posted by: Russ from Winterset at 10:20 AM

Comments

If my endocrinologist is reading this entry, please don't ask me what I'm going to be doing on February 28 when I come in for our next appointment later this week.

I like you too much to feel good about lying right to your face.

Posted by: Russ from Winterset at February 03, 2009 10:28 AM (dyz/7)

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My Little Smokey® just got hard.

Posted by: Dang at February 03, 2009 10:28 AM (Y5LIx)

3 Why aren't there bacon eating festivals in every state in the union? It's wasted fucking genius is what it is. I'm gonna have one at my house tonight. But none of you fuckers is invited cause that shit's going for about $4.50 a pound now and I can't afford but one contestant.

Posted by: pendejo grande at February 03, 2009 10:44 AM (Qhz26)

4 This is the only the second-ever bacon festival?! There are garlic festivals, onion festivals, strawberry festivals, cantaloupe festivals... but only the second-ever bacon one. And a teeny one, at that.

That's just messed up.

Posted by: AngelEm at February 03, 2009 10:50 AM (tbIup)

Vande Rose Farms bacon kicks ass! Not that I'd know, since I'm Jewish...but that's what several pork-eating Gentiles have told me. It's rumored to be yummy.

Very yummy. Nearly kosher too.

Posted by: Bullwinkle at February 03, 2009 10:57 AM (tq6GW)

6 It's more badass to be sentenced to death in absentia in some third world shithole.

Posted by: jaleach at February 03, 2009 11:08 AM (gHrZU)

7 I won't be impressed until we start seeing random mobs of Muslim miscreants youths of unknown ethnic origin burning Ewok effigies and ceremoniously pouring gallons of Val-U-Rite into the gutter.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 03, 2009 11:14 AM (kJisp)

8 Way to go on posting Instapundit's Amazon affiliate link.

Posted by: Rip at February 03, 2009 11:27 AM (MINwP)

9 Good god now I'm hungry. Wait. Wait. Isn't today free Grand Slam day? I know where I'm going for lunch!

Mmmmmm bacon.

Posted by: alexthechick at February 03, 2009 11:28 AM (SHHaV)

Bacon: is there anything it can't do?

Posted by: BackwardsBoy at February 03, 2009 11:44 AM (ZGhSv)

11 This seems appropriate here:

http://tinyurl.com/6zofna

Posted by: dan at February 03, 2009 11:46 AM (RjeLk)

That's great.

Turkey versus ham.

Can't those two confine their animosity to my bellah on Christmas Day????

Posted by: DAve at February 03, 2009 12:23 PM (wi1ec)

13 There goes Ace's ambassador gig.

Posted by: FishFearMe at February 03, 2009 12:24 PM (DL7CT)

"Bacon Bloody Marys"

I'm pretty sure I just felt my liver sobbing...

Posted by: reason at February 03, 2009 12:36 PM (XiVKO)

15 Wow. There's more pork there than in a stimulus package. Are you running for office?

Posted by: hpb at February 03, 2009 12:37 PM (PSP5C)

16 Is UncleFacts dead or something?
Calling UncleFacts..

Posted by: sickinmass at February 03, 2009 01:03 PM (/i4dU)

Banned in Turkey? Cool ! You know what this means? The same thing that happens to all things banned. They go underground. I can see it now the underground bacon railroad. Bacon smuggling, bacon speak easy's,all forms of bacon trafficing and trading bacon for weapons. Oh the humanity!

Posted by: Lou Reed at February 03, 2009 01:38 PM (K4Zxt)

Let me help you out here Ace.

I hate Islam.

This way you will never have to worry about spam from Turkey.

Wait a minute. Do they even make spam from turkey. I thought it was ham.

Posted by: Harry at February 03, 2009 02:12 PM (RxSlU)

19 I like bacon, but I have a slightly different dream. The House of Ham, Madrid, Spain.

To quote the New York Times (ouch) "close to a thousand salty cured carcasses suspended from the ceiling by the hoof, like chandeliers"

A thousand different kinds of ham. In one restaurant. And it serves beer.

Posted by: Fred Z at February 03, 2009 02:29 PM (AU9uf)

20 I don't think it's the bacon that got you banned in Turkey so much as this, since it's much more forbidden out there:

http://tinyurl.com/82zkcc

Posted by: Crusty at February 03, 2009 02:30 PM (GvSpB)

21 Sorry all I read was bacons....

Posted by: UncleFacts at February 03, 2009 03:15 PM (M+Vfm)

22 As a connoisseur of the cured meat arts, I approve of this blog posting and comment thread.

Posted by: Smokey Behr at February 03, 2009 04:00 PM (QyeW7)

23 Actually, it's not Turkey banning us; we banned Turkey.

A couple of years ago we got hit by a month-long DDoS attack. The only thing I could do to stop it was track down the sources of the attack and block entire IP ranges at the firewall to make it look like we were already down. After all, who wastes time attacking a dead web site?

Guess where the attack originated?

Yeah.

Never mind, we've been banned in Saudi Arabia, India, and South Korea (don't know what that was about, but it really happened) so we can still hold our heads high.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at February 03, 2009 05:40 PM (2yngH)

24 Well...as far as I know, I've never been banned by a Muslim majority nation...but I do have a couple of fatwas hanging around my sorry neck...

Mebbe if they knew that I like fried bacon sandwiches, dripping with real butter... (The looks of weary resignation my doc gives me is heartwarming. Really.)

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Posted by: replica watches at February 04, 2010 04:10 AM (YOuVm)

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Posted by: Jason at February 05, 2010 12:07 AM (rNeCO)

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Posted by: replica watches at February 09, 2010 09:11 AM (fa8ya)

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