Senator Bill Clinton?

The 40-kegger parties he and Ted Kennedy would throw for all the DC undgergrads would be legendary.

The former president is among several boldface names being touted as possible "caretakers" for New York's Senate seat -- people who would serve until the 2010 elections but wouldn't be interested in running to keep the job.
As the process of picking Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton's replacement gets messier, the option may become increasingly attractive to Gov. David Paterson, who has sole authority to name a successor.
A big name like Bill Clinton or Democratic former Gov. Mario Cuomo could have an immediate impact for New York in the Senate while letting the large field of hopefuls duke it out in 2010, according to three Democratic Party advisers in New York and Washington who are close to the discussion with Paterson's inner circle on this issue.
Two others in the party confirmed that Paterson is still considering the caretaker option.

In related news, I just hanged myself in the garage. I am typing this with the last oxygggggggen in my brrrrrrr

Posted by: Ace at 05:19 PM

Comments

1 You could always move back to MA. Oops, wait, you're dead.

Posted by: Vinnie at January 01, 2009 05:24 PM (idf83)

ha ha! and you guys laugh at the brits with their royal family.

Posted by: pooper at January 01, 2009 05:25 PM (bZGTJ)

3 Just when I thought I was out...........they pull me back in.

Posted by: Don Clinteone at January 01, 2009 05:26 PM (+FzLa)

4 A Clinton trumping the Kennedy family?...a potentially historic event...now back to the Rose Bowl.

Posted by: billygoat at January 01, 2009 05:26 PM (WQqt3)

5 I always knew Ace would die of auto-asphyxiation. I just thought he'd be happier about it.

Posted by: mrobvious at January 01, 2009 05:27 PM (x1h/A)

6 I for one welcome our new disbarred, adulterous and impeached overlord.

At first, I didn't think he'd be interested but it would upstage Hillary which he likes and it's really his seat anyway, no way Hillary has it if he doesn't get the blow jobs. So why not?

That said, I'm sticking with Kristen Gillibrand as my guess.

Posted by: DrewM. at January 01, 2009 05:27 PM (hlYel)

7 Senator Clinton hammered Secretary of State Clinton during Senate hearings on the Smurfs/Transformers War.

Posted by: eman at January 01, 2009 05:29 PM (9jESx)

8 That said, I'm sticking with Kristen Gillibrand as my guess.

I'd hit it; with a lead pipe.

Posted by: billygoat at January 01, 2009 05:30 PM (WQqt3)

9 Caretaker of the seat? More like caretaker of the toilet seat, like after your first cup of morning coffee, after a night of Mexican food and cheap beer.

Who are they kidding? They love the guy so much he'll keep that seat until his ticker blows or his liver fails.

Posted by: Blazer at January 01, 2009 05:31 PM (+FzLa)

10 He'll never take it.

Posted by: toetotoetotoe at January 01, 2009 05:32 PM (wD0yO)

11 Harry Reid: "We're gonna need a bigger boat..."

Posted by: George Orwell at January 01, 2009 05:34 PM (FCbvi)

12 Unfortunately, I saw Bill and Hill on Fox's New Year's Eve special last night. I think they lit the big fuckin' ball at midnight or something. They were huggin' and shit...like they like each other or something. I can't believe nobody threw an egg or rotten tomato at these hillbillies...

Posted by: scrood at January 01, 2009 05:37 PM (1dOyI)

13 The majority of americans wanted 'change' in politics but no one seems to be listening. ?

Posted by: politicalmuse at January 01, 2009 05:39 PM (kLKnf)

14 Oh Noes!!! Beer only has CO2... gurgle, gurgle.

Posted by: contributor x at January 01, 2009 05:42 PM (/Zt8j)

15 Unfortunately, I saw Bill and Hill on Fox's New Year's Eve special last night. I think they lit the big fuckin' ball at midnight or something. They were huggin' and shit...like they like each other or something. I can't believe nobody threw an egg or rotten tomato at these hillbillies...

There's only one (OK, two) thing(s) these two whores like -- money and power...u pick the order.

Saw them yank the ball crank last night as well...almost lost my Jaeger....

Posted by: billygoat at January 01, 2009 05:43 PM (WQqt3)

16 pretty fucking funny. Or not.

Posted by: Michael Hutchence at January 01, 2009 05:46 PM (P0rQD)

17 big benefit of clinton as senator - darrell hammond lives on.

Posted by: dr. akim ullshitbey at January 01, 2009 05:47 PM (tORHu)

18 No way Bill gives the seat back if he gets it. He'll enjoy the power and perks of the Senate too much to go back to being a private citizen.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at January 01, 2009 05:48 PM (MKNSy)

19 Oh for fuck's sake. Guess I'm going to be opening that bottle of Val U Rite earlier than I thought.

Posted by: alexthechick at January 01, 2009 05:49 PM (xUOXi)

20 ixnay on the ottenray

Posted by: igor at January 01, 2009 05:50 PM (Z7XGF)

21 Will Bill Clinton and his stupid bitch wife never go away? They are some kind of political herpes.

Posted by: Shaitan at January 01, 2009 05:54 PM (65WaW)

In related news, I just hanged myself in the garage. I am typing this with the last oxygggggggen in my brrrrrrr

Don't die now, can't you imagine Clinton deciding to go "maverick" and fucking with Obama for two years? Lord this could be exquisite. Both Clintons and Obama sucking up all the oxygen in DC while stabbing each other in the back and dividing the Dem caucus into factions. Why shouldn't Clinton work behind the scenes to sabotage Obama? After all he wouldn't want Obama to be known as a better president than him plus you know he's still pissed about getting the race card played on him.

Posted by: Big E at January 01, 2009 05:55 PM (RWzXM)

23 Can't they just dig up Moynihan and prop him up in his seat.
It worked with Byrd.

Posted by: Rocks at January 01, 2009 05:56 PM (7rbe9)

Call Hooters and get me some interns!

Posted by: Bubba at January 01, 2009 05:59 PM (XWJh5)

25 Senator and Pimp, Billie Bob Clinton.

Posted by: Enter sandman at January 01, 2009 06:00 PM (zxaA2)

26 I'm looking forward to serving the people of New York and receiving blowjobs from a new set of interns.

Posted by: Bill Clinton at January 01, 2009 06:11 PM (e3TKF)

27 "Unfortunately, I saw Bill and Hill on Fox's New Year's Eve special last night. I think they lit the big fuckin' ball at midnight or something. They were huggin' and shit...like they like each other or something. I can't believe nobody threw an egg or rotten tomato at these hillbillies..."

Hell, I would've grabbed two hands full of ass and played tonsil hockey with her after the ball dropped if Bloomberg would've payed me enough.

Posted by: Blazer at January 01, 2009 06:14 PM (+FzLa)

28 The United States Senate House of Lords

Posted by: sherlock at January 01, 2009 06:21 PM (8V5Ut)

29 "Unfortunately, I saw Bill and Hill on Fox's New Year's Eve special last night. I think they lit the big fuckin' ball at midnight or something. They were huggin' and shit...like they like each other or something. I can't believe nobody threw an egg or rotten tomato at these hillbillies..."

You KNOW damn well they were thinking of someone else while they were doing it

Posted by: Frank G at January 01, 2009 06:22 PM (P0rQD)

30 24 Hooters girls have more self-respect than Washington interns.

29 Themselves, not each other...

Posted by: richard mcenroe at January 01, 2009 06:38 PM (DBS+D)

31 Don't die now, can't you imagine Clinton deciding to go "maverick" and fucking with Obama for two years? Lord this could be exquisite. Both Clintons and Obama sucking up all the oxygen in DC while stabbing each other in the back and dividing the Dem caucus into factions. Why shouldn't Clinton work behind the scenes to sabotage Obama? After all he wouldn't want Obama to be known as a better president than him plus you know he's still pissed about getting the race card played on him.

+1

Posted by: shibumi at January 01, 2009 06:40 PM (tZB/c)

32 This is just delish-a-billie-ishus! Bill in the Senate, Hillary at State...BO doesn't stand a chance. Bill & Hill will outsmart them at every turn. Nancy & Harry must be wetting their pants.

Posted by: MrsPaulsFishSticks at January 01, 2009 06:41 PM (PBGAP)

33 No, no, no... this election was supposed to be the death of the Republican Party, NOT the damned Republic...

Posted by: richard mcenroe at January 01, 2009 06:43 PM (DBS+D)

Funny how Obama without any executive experience is qualified for the White House; and Billy without any legislative experience is qualified for the Senate. Has anyone noticed alot of goatees being worn in Washington lately?

Posted by: andycanuck at January 01, 2009 06:43 PM (55TIb)

35 and I bet she is still pissed that the O didn't help retire her campaign debt. The mugging this duo would give O will be stupendous.

Posted by: MrsPaulsFishSticks at January 01, 2009 06:44 PM (PBGAP)

36 Oh, my mistake. If this were the Mirror, Mirror universe, they'd both be competent, patriotic, loyal, sober etc. Never mind.

Posted by: andycanuck at January 01, 2009 06:44 PM (55TIb)

37 God, I fucking hate this state with every fiber of my being...

Posted by: Unclefacts at January 01, 2009 06:45 PM (M+Vfm)

BTW, Ace, don't run towards the light.

Posted by: andycanuck at January 01, 2009 06:45 PM (55TIb)

39 I love the Clintons.

I know it's wrong.

But there are worse things.

Posted by: SlaveDog at January 01, 2009 06:48 PM (6Gy0q)

Hell, I would've grabbed two hands full of ass and played tonsil hockey with her after the ball dropped if Bloomberg would've payed me enough.

You wouldn't have to pay me, I would've poked her with my big EIB mike! She's Hot!!

Posted by: Rushbo at January 01, 2009 06:50 PM (1dOyI)

41 Ace, you're even funny in death.

Posted by: mare at January 01, 2009 06:53 PM (X1fsj)

42 Pick either Clinton, you're getting the BEST MAN for the job, regardless of the wardrobe.

Posted by: Enter sandman at January 01, 2009 06:58 PM (zxaA2)

43 Oh c'mon Enter sandman, don'tcha think Hillary looks damn fine in her pantsuits? My EIB mike is getting excited!

Posted by: Rushbo at January 01, 2009 07:02 PM (1dOyI)

44

I think I just threw up in my mouth a little...

Yep, I did.

Thanks fucker.

Posted by: Unclefacts at January 01, 2009 07:11 PM (M+Vfm)

45 EIB = Excellence In Bonors and I owe it all to that sweet lady from Arkansas...

Posted by: Rushbo at January 01, 2009 07:13 PM (1dOyI)

Are you gay Unclefacts?

Just check out the legs on Hillary...oh oh, there goes my EIB mike again! Thoughts of Hillary talking to my big EIB mike are going to get me through 2009!

Posted by: Rushbo at January 01, 2009 07:21 PM (1dOyI)

47 Come on, folks. Ted is retiring sooner rather than later. I know it. You know it. We need somebody to be the senator who makes waitress sandwiches, runs around wearing nothing but a button-down shirt on Easter weekend and willards attractive young women in the back of motorboats. Ladies and gentlemen, William Jefferson Clinton is your man.

Posted by: Rich Fader at January 01, 2009 07:22 PM (lgYLR)

48 (Bill and Hill dancing in the new year and kissing)
You KNOW damn well they were thinking of someone else while they were doing it

Funny enough it was the same person.. the attractive waitress who served them dinner earlier..

Posted by: Dave C at January 01, 2009 07:28 PM (ibOiq)

49 WJC could only HOPE to be the sleaze Ted has presented to the (non-MSM) world. Still, ya gotta have an idol to live up to... and the job will be open. Hmmmmm....

Posted by: Kipper Snacks at January 01, 2009 07:29 PM (+Q0+O)

50

Nope, not gay, married 22 years now.

Just a bit queasy with that horrendous image in my head thanks to you.

Posted by: Unclefacts at January 01, 2009 07:30 PM (M+Vfm)

51 I hope Hillary was dreaming of me and my EIB mike when she kissed that unappreciative Philanderer-in-Chief!

Posted by: Rushbo at January 01, 2009 07:30 PM (1dOyI)

52 #37 - Unclefacts - if you're talking about NY - I agree with you 100%. Live here 2 years and don't think that I can take another.

Posted by: Nurse Cheri at January 01, 2009 08:00 PM (cz6lG)

53
Yep, lived here over 40 agony filled years. Just when you think it can't POSSIBLY get worse, the liberals prove you wrong.

If my family wasn't here, I'd have been long gone years ago.

Posted by: Unclefacts at January 01, 2009 08:09 PM (M+Vfm)

54 Allow me to blaspheme:

Much better for everyone than Princess Caroline.

Posted by: Circa (Insert Year Here) at January 01, 2009 08:38 PM (ZylhF)

Hey Unclefacts, I can feel your pain! Last night, I had to kiss that fat cow "wife" of mine...yecch!

I decided to have a little fun and I stuck my tongue down the old Senator's throat! Don't worry for my health, I did a couple of shots of Southern Comfort to sterilize my tongue.

Posted by: The Bill Clinton at January 01, 2009 08:46 PM (1dOyI)

It's not your tongue I was worried about, Bill.

Posted by: Senator H.R. Clinton (D-NY) at January 01, 2009 09:06 PM (55TIb)

What're you doing here?!

Can't a guy get some time to hang out with his morons?

Posted by: The Bill Clinton at January 01, 2009 09:13 PM (1dOyI)

58 No offense guys!

Posted by: Bill Clinton AKA Sen. Moron at January 01, 2009 09:14 PM (1dOyI)

40 kegger? More cock than a pisshouse blue out-house could withstand.

More blue out-houses. thx.

Posted by: Hugh Jass at January 01, 2009 09:18 PM (kVzrh)

And it won't be that hillbilly beer that we used to drink back in Arkansas! When I drank that swill, I made some serious mistakes (see above)...

I'll represent more than the fine citizens of New York. I'll represent my favorite morons here at AOS! I'll be sure you guys get a piece of that stimulus package! I can envision some sort of intern-work study program with Denmark and Sweeden...any other bright ideas?

Posted by: Bill Clinton AKA Sen. Moron at January 01, 2009 09:26 PM (1dOyI)

61 Don't do it Ace! Tomorrow's another day! There is always Hope and Change^TM!!!

Posted by: Suicide Hotline Operator at January 01, 2009 09:36 PM (B1QYg)

Fuck that Hope and Change^TM shit! We're talkin' ragin' kegger with hot chicks! Snap out of it Ace! Hell, you can bring your ValuRite, if you like.

Posted by: Bill Clinton AKA Sen. Moron at January 01, 2009 09:40 PM (1dOyI)

63 Chelsea Clinton turns 30 in 2010. She and Beau Biden can take their family Senate seats simultaneously.

It really is the House of Lords!

Posted by: HeatherRadish at January 01, 2009 09:49 PM (1U+fo)

64 Oh HeatherRadish don't be such a buzzkill. Maybe after the kegger we can hit the Waffle House and talk about Chelsea's credentials... Do you have any girlfriends?

Posted by: Bill Clinton AKA Sen. Moron at January 01, 2009 09:56 PM (1dOyI)

Markie Marxist sez: "That's cool! Bill could be New York's first black Senator!"

Posted by: Chas at January 01, 2009 10:21 PM (1XTjz)

66 Bill would never give up the money he is getting from the Arabs. For what, to sit around with Hillary?

Posted by: MikeH at January 01, 2009 10:22 PM (1V2sa)

67 I think the media is just trying to make us cry.

Posted by: PJ at January 01, 2009 11:09 PM (fyFnu)

68 "No, No No, Hil honey, they're not prostitutes, they're CONSTITUENTS".

Posted by: bill1200 at January 01, 2009 11:10 PM (aowoN)

69 Senate seat and office in Harley? As Flounder would say with that stupid grin "Boy oh Boy, this is gonna be fun..."

Posted by: hutch1200 at January 01, 2009 11:12 PM (aowoN)

70 Say what MikeH?! Haven't you been reading papers? Hillary is heading to DC to be the next Sec ofState. I wanna be the Senator "Moron" of NY and I plan on hangin' in NYC and DC (when Hil is out of town). There's some hot bitches in NYC...Whatcha think I was thinking about when I was smooching Hil? The hot bitches, of course!

Posted by: Bill Clinton AKA Sen. Moron at January 01, 2009 11:13 PM (1dOyI)

71 hutch1200 is my kinda moron. Do you work on my staff? Don't read into that offer too much, unless you're a smokin' hot chick!

Posted by: Bill Clinton AKA Sen. Moron at January 01, 2009 11:16 PM (1dOyI)

72 Government by DNA

Posted by: sickinmass at January 01, 2009 11:20 PM (/i4dU)

George Bush kept us from a repeat 9/11. When the next attack comes,
all the Obama commemorative coins and platters will not count for jack-shit
with the electorate. All of you that thought these were a good investment
will be sorry. Even if Hillary becomes SOS and Bill becomes "caretaker"
of her NY senate seat, I still have extreme pessimism as to our safety. I'm
going to sell my Obama memorabilia quietly in the next few weeks. I
suggest you do likewise soon. But don't flood the market.

Posted by: grizzly bare at January 01, 2009 11:56 PM (vzw1g)

74 Hey grizzly bare, are you going to get rid of my collectibles? That would just break my heart...which would need consoling from some hot chicks! Do you have any sisters, mothers, aunts, maids, interns, or other chicks that could console this "caretaker Senator"?

Posted by: Bill Clinton AKA Sen. Moron at January 02, 2009 12:18 AM (1dOyI)

75 73, you mean you bought some Obama commemorative shit? Loser. I put the money into ammo.

Look, Bubba Clinton and Ted Kennedy are the worst of the Democratic Party, but I'd still party with them. Bill knows where to get Cuban cigars, even if I wouldn't accept an unwrapped one from him since I wouldn't know where it had been, and Teddy is generous with the Scotch.

Posted by: SGT Dan at January 02, 2009 01:31 AM (ACq/K)

76 He might just take it. Dude loves the sound of his own voice and a captive audience would be heaven. C-SPAN coverage only sweetens the deal...

Posted by: Shannon at January 02, 2009 02:08 AM (v4qA1)

77 Bill Clinton has decades of experience holding a chair down with his ass. I think this would be a no-brainer for New York.

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