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Iowahawk: Apologetic Mumbai Killers Mortified That They Didn't Get Memo Obama Had Been Elected

A tragic failure of communications:

MUMBAI - Ajmal Amir Kasab, the sole surviving member of the 10-man team of Pakistani gunmen that left hundreds dead or wounded after a bloody three day rampage in Mumbai, today blamed the mayhem on an "email mixup" that left him and his colleagues unaware that Barack Obama had won election as President of the United States.

"What? Oh bloody hell, now you tell me," said Kasab, as he was led away in handcuffs by Indian security forces.

Kasab, 21, apologized to Indian President Pratibha Patil, explaining that no one in his group had known about the recent U.S. election results.

"Boy, talk about having egg on the face," said a visibly embarrassed Kasab. "If we knew Bush was on his way out, obviously we would have called off the crazy random baby-shootings and martyrdom stuff, and signed on with the Peace Corps or Habitat for Humanity. At this point I guess all I can say is 'my bad.'"


Posted by: Ace at 08:38 PM



Comments

1 Iowahawk is getting so good, I may check his website out myself instead of waiting for Ace to tell me about it.

Posted by: AmishDude at December 02, 2008 08:41 PM (T0NGe)

2 Iowahawk always brings the funny.

For unintentional funny, check out palindeception.com (safe link to Treacher). Those people are so batshit crazy they make Andi Sullivan look like Brit Hume. Now I finally understand who believes in Lizard People.

Posted by: Jim62sch at December 02, 2008 08:42 PM (6rQXk)

3 Crap. I hate Iowahawk. He's funnier than I could ever even hope to be.

Posted by: OregonMuse at December 02, 2008 08:45 PM (bMJ2V)

4 I hate Iowahawk. He's funnier than I could ever even hope to be.

Tell me about it. :-(

Posted by: V the K at December 02, 2008 08:52 PM (d2fuu)

5 I covet that Riviera of his, too.

Posted by: Sort-of-Mad Max at December 02, 2008 09:01 PM (kKgTD)

6 Iowahawk is definitely in a league of his own, an amazing satirist.  I am still jealous of the Chicago morons who got to meet him at the meet-up. 

Posted by: CB at December 02, 2008 09:05 PM (9Wv2j)

7 How the @#%&* could he not have heard?  According to the liberals, the entire universe is joyously celebrating that the US has joined the rest of the world in being beautiful, holy and educated by electing Obama.  He must be an ignorant cave troll not to have gotten the news.

Posted by: katya at December 02, 2008 09:26 PM (G3frc)

8 Iowahawk is teh genius.

Posted by: African Queen Conservative (who can't vote... yet) at December 02, 2008 09:34 PM (h6ixI)

9

I think that pipe MUST have some good shit in it!!

Why doesn't this guy write for TV?  Fox SNL?? 

Get my agent!!

Kemp

Posted by: kempermanx at December 02, 2008 10:03 PM (2+9Yx)

10

The good news is, this is excellent satire.

The bad news is, odds are a lot of libs really do think this way.

Oh, well.  We need to laugh so we don't cry all the time.  In the upcoming era of the One, we of the 48 will need to get our laughs where we can.

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