Yawn: Local Texas Grand Jury Indicts Dick Cheney

No word on what it is he's supposed to have been indicted for -- as if they need a good reason.

Texas is odd-- solidly, strongly conservative, but with these pockets of the most hyperpartisan liberals in the entire country. The. Entire. Country.

I'm guessing that 80% of the most obnoxiously nasty partisan Democrats hail from Texas. Paul Begala, for one.

(Who, interestingly enough, plays the Texas Card within three minutes of the start off any interview. "I'm not some kind of hippy-dippy moonbeam half-a-fag liberal! I'm from Texas!" he always says. Interesting that those who get so incensed about Sarah Palin's statement that some areas of the country may be more patriotic and "real America" than others are also among the most eager to play the Real America Card themselves.

And, also curiously, the media never asks him follow-up questions about this oft-repeated assertion -- like whether or not he's denigrating Charles Schumer, who is not from Texas, and therefore a possible city-slicker quee-eh.)

Thanks to DrewM.

Posted by: Ace at 05:31 PM

Comments

1 Nuke Austin. Pockets of Dallas (the "artsy" parts) can go, too.

Posted by: AngelEm at November 18, 2008 05:34 PM (EyKhI)

2 They didn't indict the ham on rye I had for lunch?

Posted by: Jean at November 18, 2008 05:36 PM (HVRSA)

3 It's time to arrest the DA for insurrection. This has to stop.

Posted by: MarkD at November 18, 2008 05:36 PM (qZFLO)

4 On the other hand, even in those hyperpartisan liberal pockets, there are super-random social conservative outposts - like going onto the UTAustin campus, walking toward the largest crowd standing around, and realizing they're listening to a guy who is saying "you know, I have lots of homosexual friends, but that doesn't change the fact that it's a perversion of the love between a man and a woman..."

Oy vey. It's enough to give you whiplash. If you're really lucky, there'll be a guy wearing a dress in the crowd somewhere to add to the dissonance.

Posted by: Elena at November 18, 2008 05:36 PM (30eg4)

5 The left needs to grow up from this shit and fast.

There's plenty of room to shake hands after a tough political fight and make up. But the left needs to understand that from some things, there is no turning back. They are too fucking dumb to realize that this bullshit is going to open a Pandora's box of pain they do. not. want.

Posted by: a4g at November 18, 2008 05:39 PM (LLF8h)

but with these pockets of the most hyperpartisan liberals in the entire country. The. Entire. Country.

Never been to Seattle, huh Ace?

Posted by: AndrewsDad at November 18, 2008 05:39 PM (C2//T)

7 They all think they're Jim Garrison. However, Garrison was no Kevin Kostner. He was disgusting to look at and creepy. Plus, he was a crook.

Posted by: Perry Mason at November 18, 2008 05:39 PM (P1Evy)

8 Willancy County sounds like a quaint little spot where people have a lot of time on their hands. And inter-marriage is the most popular contact sport.

Posted by: GarandFan at November 18, 2008 05:42 PM (eJ32B)

9 Willacy County is down in the Rio Grande valley, near Brownsville. 20,000 people in the county; 12th poorest county in the US, by per capita income. A history of weird politics down there.

Posted by: ScurvyOaks at November 18, 2008 05:49 PM (s7sYI)

10 Please don't nuke Austin. Or at least give me a chance to get my shit packed.

Never been to Seattle, huh Ace?

Austin does not (and cannot) hold a candle to Seattle. Austin's most dipshit leftist maniac is like a Capitol Hill moderate.

Posted by: tachyonshuggy at November 18, 2008 05:51 PM (TXp3z)

11 Did anybody see the other headlines in this rag? Perverts, dope selling councilwoman (and hubby), human trafficers, and gangland violence. And the 15 Stoners who were too stupid to get out of jury duty, or thought it was a good gig, decided to pull this shit??? Seems like a whole lotta other shit goin' down that needs more fucking attention.

Posted by: hutch1200 at November 18, 2008 05:51 PM (e9cdI)

12 Cool! Maybe, he'll be in custody when they arraign him and Lynne will show up with flash grenades and shotguns and bust him out!

Posted by: Perry Mason at November 18, 2008 05:52 PM (P1Evy)

13 Willacy County, TX? Are you sure it isn't the Duchy of Grand Fenwick?

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 18, 2008 05:54 PM (Ds4I5)

Hey, we welcome everyone here. Gun toters, libs, gays, conservatives, illegals, legals, whatever. No income tax, great weather (75 yesterday in Dallas), lots of room, real estate values are still fairly good, gasoline is 1.65 a gallon, and finally, finally, we no longer have to listen to the Northeastern liberal hippie commie pinko fags bash Bush anymore.

Now if it would just rain.

Posted by: mikeyslaw at November 18, 2008 05:59 PM (QMGr1)

And Willacy County is a hole, a real fucking hole.

Posted by: mikeyslaw at November 18, 2008 06:01 PM (QMGr1)

16 So they indicted Cheney for investing in a corporation that may or may not have committed crimes? According to liberals all corporations are evil and guilty of crimes. We better build more prisons.

Posted by: Gman at November 18, 2008 06:02 PM (jdq6d)

17 I blame the flood of non-Texans and draconian bag limits on same.

Posted by: Cautiously Pessimistic at November 18, 2008 06:12 PM (ltwze)

Was this a case of a run-away grand jury or is there a DA here trying to make a name? Not much info in that link.

Posted by: Vic at November 18, 2008 06:14 PM (Qd7GC)

"I'm not some kind of hippy-dippy moonbeam half-a-fag liberal! I'm from Texas!"

I always thought he was from Talos IV

Posted by: PR at November 18, 2008 06:15 PM (k7SeR)

20 Willacy County Grand Jury? Heh. The D.A. corralled a collection of street zombies too stupid, drunk, and/or stoned to find Padre Island.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at November 18, 2008 06:20 PM (sI5Ho)

21 The Willacy County DA is a corrupt buffoon. Just google Juan Angel Guerra.

Posted by: Ham Sandwich at November 18, 2008 06:27 PM (z4EdS)

22 "I'm from Texas" comes out within the first three sentences of anybody from Texas.

I don't know what it is about Texans. They seem to think us impressed. We are not. It is a place. Not an accomplishment.

Posted by: Seattle Slough at November 18, 2008 06:30 PM (H5l9d)

23 "I don't know what it is about Texans. They seem to think us impressed. We are not. It is a place. Not an accomplishment."

And some people use their city of residence as their first name.

It takes all kinds.

Posted by: Officer Paddy O' Irony at November 18, 2008 06:35 PM (sI5Ho)

24 Oh, God, Willacy County has one of stupidest and most corrupt governments in America. Yes, they are Democrats. Don't get me started on South Texas Democrats. I can 't go into too much detail for privacy reasons, but a group I work with was involved with a dumbass thing the county pulled a couple of years ago. They tried to condemn a private nature preserve as a city park so someone's brother-in-law could make money off the concessions they would put in there. It was assumed that the Kelo case was their inspiration.

Meanwhile, the DA and the county commissioners were all being investigated for unrelated corruption. The nature preserve appealed to Senator Hutchison for help, and the preserve was turned over to the National Park Service to save it.

To sum up: Democrats, one of whom was working from jail, tried to condemn a nature preserve, which was saved by a Republican senator and a Republican Dept of Interior. The nature preserve was paying the county property taxes, but since it's federal property now, the County lost the tax revenue from that land. This was not a win-win. It was a win-lose, and Willacy County lost.

Posted by: stace at November 18, 2008 06:40 PM (JO0c/)

25 "...but with these pockets of the most hyperpartisan liberals in the entire country. The. Entire. Country."

Doesn't matter how many periods you put in the sentence. It's still an absurd statement. So many places have us beat, hands down. Washington, Oregon, Frisco, Vermont, NYC. Good Lord, the list is too long.

Posted by: Kevin at November 18, 2008 06:52 PM (KO6dP)

26 "I'm not some kind of hippy-dippy moonbeam half-a-fag liberal! I'm from Texas!"

Anybody calling Begala half-a-fag would be trying their damnedest not to offend a gay audience.

Posted by: Captain Hate at November 18, 2008 06:54 PM (m2sQh)

27 Wow, Ace, are your really that stupid?

Is or was Paul Begala running for office or is he just a Political Strategist? He is a Political Strategist! In that case, why would we care about his opinion

Was Sarah Palin running for office? Yes! That's why we cared to hear her opinion! (Not that we care anymore!! -- She lost, remember!!)

Personally, they should have indicated Cheney and Gonzalez a long time ago for Guant�namo Bay!! (Hey, maybe they're just warming up!!)

[BTW, why do Republicans name-call so much?? Trying to make-up for feelings of inferiority? Or just angry because you lost!? And thanks for the worst 8 years this country has had to endure and for the decades it will take to fix it!!]

Posted by: YoMama at November 18, 2008 07:06 PM (L/ucV)

Gonna have to stand up for the superstars in the California Legislature, here. If you want crazed, rapacious, no-class, brain-dead, howling, shrieking, grotesquely partisan libs, the CA Legislature is best of breed.

Under the stately Capitol dome in Sacramento, you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. Seriously. Texas libs are pikers compared to the unholy nutjobs who populate the two Demo caucuses in the CA Legislature.

Posted by: mike d at November 18, 2008 07:09 PM (91OXS)

29 Like Ham Sandwich says, google the DA who did this.

The Insane Clown Posse is in charge of this county. They are Democrats who win re-election repeatedly.

http://tinyurl.com/58jzpx

Posted by: stace at November 18, 2008 07:12 PM (JO0c/)

30 "Wow, Ace, are your really that stupid?..."

Looks like it's going to be a long shift. I hope I brought enough coffee. (From Official Code Enforcement manual: Why attribute to typos what I can attribute to stupidity?)

Posted by: Officer Paddy O' Irony at November 18, 2008 07:16 PM (sI5Ho)

31 YoMama, Ace didn't write this post, and go to this link to read about your Lion of Willacy, the guy who was brave enough to indict Cheney.

http://tinyurl.com/58jzpx

Posted by: stace at November 18, 2008 07:19 PM (JO0c/)

The left needs to grow up from this shit and fast

Fat chance. They feel vindicated now that The Anointed has been elected, and they think childish temper tantrums are how elections are won. Hell, maybe they're right, but they are still a collection of immature, uninformed cocksuckers and I look forward to a harsh comeuppance one day.

Posted by: UGAdawg at November 18, 2008 07:21 PM (MDHAs)

33 SS, you sound like you have an inferiority complex. Why do you worry about things like that? I think regional pride is fun. You have a big ol' stick up your butt.

Posted by: stace at November 18, 2008 07:21 PM (JO0c/)

34 Check out the post and comments here.

This is from the think tank that's supposed to inform Obama.

Posted by: Bilby at November 18, 2008 07:23 PM (y703o)

35 For now, though, all eyes are on CAP, which, from its perch 10 floors above H Street in downtown Washington, will spend the next few months revamping its operation to acknowledge a kindred spirit in the Oval Office. �We have been oriented as opposition,� says Faiz Shakir, CAP�s research director and the editor-in-chief of its popular blog, Think Progress. �We are pretty good at that; we know how to deconstruct Republican ideas.�

Nice.

Posted by: Bilby at November 18, 2008 07:25 PM (y703o)

36 BTW, why do Republicans name-call so much?

Some fuckface poopyhead doesn't spend much time on Kos or Huffblow much....

Oops, I just did some namecalling. I must be a fascist rethuglican.

I denounce myself.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at November 18, 2008 07:28 PM (Ds4I5)

I would not be too sure if all the jury down by the Southern Border of Texas could speak English. They might have been asking them if they want ham sandwiches for lunch and they all raised their hands.

By the way there is a whole lot of Texans, and unlike Alaska it is not covered by ice. We have the and biggest of everything including nutjobs and idjets but they don't have the density per square mile that you find in the left coast and the North East.

Sadly, we seem to be working on catching up on that crap too.

Posted by: OldTexan at November 18, 2008 07:28 PM (M8zes)

38 27 Wow, Ace, are your really that stupid?

...

[BTW, why do Republicans name-call so much??

YoMama, I'm just wondering if you're smart enough to figure out why we think you're funny. Hint: we're laughing at you, not with you.

Trying to make-up for feelings of inferiority?

Hint #2: project much?

Or just angry because you lost!? And thanks for the worst 8 years this country has had to endure and for the decades it will take to fix it!!]

Worst 8 years? Have you read about the joys FDR inflicted on us? Or the civil war your party started so that they could keep their slaves? Our first attempt at a national government?

Or is your frame of reference limited to the good old days when there was so little of importance going on in the world that we could afford a President who spent his time chasing tail around the Oval Office? Have you figured out that didn't turn out well?

By the way, how petty are you to be whining here when you got your false messiah into the White House?

Posted by: Methos at November 18, 2008 07:30 PM (qcpaS)

39 Yeah Willacy county is not exactly intellectual central. And being a Texan is an accomplishment! Begala is not a Texan, he just spent some time in our state.

Posted by: Wolverine at November 18, 2008 07:39 PM (/Zcox)

Being a Texan and being from Texas, not one in the same!

Posted by: Wolverine at November 18, 2008 07:41 PM (/Zcox)

41 There's only two things from Texas; Steers and.......well, you know the rest.

Posted by: Techie at November 18, 2008 07:44 PM (EVMm7)

42 Wow, Ace, are your really that stupid?

[BTW, why do Republicans name-call so much?? . . .

Do you not see a problem with including both those statements within the same post?

Can you guess what that problem is, or does it have to be pointed out to you?

Was Sarah Palin running for office? Yes! That's why we cared to hear her opinion! (Not that we care anymore!! -- She lost, remember!!)

You know what I do when I don't care?

I don't spend my day surfing my opponents' websites looking for an opportunity to comment on something I don't care about.

In fact, I don't do that even when I do care...Because I have a life and a decent job and I also never find your opinions insightful.

Anyway, when I don't care, I then proceed not to write comments and argue with people about these things I don't care about.

But that's just me.

Posted by: AD at November 18, 2008 08:17 PM (dW9kw)

43 This DA was a guy who dismissed charges against a murderer because he was too busy to prepare for the trial. But, he did manage to fit "Indict a man who has never been to your county" into his To Do list.

Posted by: Ted K. at November 18, 2008 08:34 PM (tauPe)

Nifong is a saint next to this guy.

The Texas Supreme Court needs to chop up his law license TODAY.

Posted by: Bender at November 18, 2008 08:50 PM (62LLx)

45 FU to whoever said nuke Austin and Dallas. I am a real Texan born and raised, not like our idiot Pres who is northeastern elitist, went to Yale, was a cheerleard, lol. WTF. Texas is not that conservative anymore my friends. The republican party is dying because you guys are not real "conservatives" ya'll just cherrypick issues. If you were real conservatives, where is the conservative spending, consuming, environment etc... Conservatism=being a dick!

Posted by: Ernesto at November 18, 2008 08:54 PM (p33D8)

46 YoMama,

Personally, they should have indicated Cheney and Gonzalez a long time ago for Guant�namo Bay!!

Personally? That doesn't make sense. Is English your second language? Don't worry about it. I'm sure you're just as smart as those libtards who were interviewed on election day.

Posted by: TheQuietMan at November 18, 2008 08:58 PM (QQd26)

47 [comment deleted]

Posted by: U.S. Dept of Fairness at November 18, 2008 08:58 PM (p33D8)

48 The Insane Clown Posse is in charge of this county. They are Democrats who win re-election repeatedly.

Sounds like Palm Beach county. The FBI recently setup a permanent office in WPB to investigate county corruption.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at November 18, 2008 09:08 PM (OqXyp)

49 The republican party is dying because you guys are not real "conservatives" ya'll just cherrypick issues.

It's like they pick everything they're doing and then accuse us of it.

Do they give you all a nice coloring book at Kos to study the theoretical history of conservatism or did you learn this all on your own?

Posted by: AD at November 18, 2008 09:09 PM (dW9kw)

50 Hey Ernesto, you gonna let Farmer Todd spew that semi-literate tripe using your computer?

Posted by: J. Wilde at November 18, 2008 09:27 PM (ucJiT)

51 Just so you know how serious this indictment is. They also indicted my dick!

Posted by: rls at November 18, 2008 09:46 PM (k4h7p)

52 p33D8,

At least three dimensions of idiotic fail there. Your post in the other thread makes four. Four dimensions of fail.

Congratulations. Come back in January to see if you win one of the prized, annual Gilded Turds.

Posted by: AnonymousDrivel at November 18, 2008 10:02 PM (sI5Ho)

53 They're all excited at HuffPo.
Cheney's finally gonna do the perp walk.
It's kind of cute. One of them wants to go down to Raymondville and serve on the jury. I told him he needs to know there are no 24-hour therapists on call and no take-out sushi.

Posted by: stace at November 18, 2008 10:05 PM (JO0c/)

SeattlySlough #22:

You need to inform yourself about those that you try to malign. Texas is a hell of a place. I'm not from Texas; but, I would be except for my spouse's employment. "It's like a whole other country!" And, that's a good thing.

Seattle? Well, everybody has to be somewhere...

Posted by: noprisoners at November 18, 2008 10:08 PM (ED95h)

I'm from Texas!

and i'm also from hidalgo county, right next to willacy. i wouldn't make much of this at all.

there's now way to explain politics here.

Posted by: carl carlson at November 18, 2008 10:12 PM (dZ8HB)

* or grammar.

(christ)

Posted by: carl carlson at November 18, 2008 10:13 PM (dZ8HB)

57 "I'm not some kind of hippy-dippy moonbeam half-a-fag liberal! I'm from Texas!"

Oh, yeah? Quoth the Gunny:

"The only things that come from Texas are steers and queers! Which one are you?!"

Posted by: cheshirecat at November 18, 2008 10:31 PM (iSoGU)

58 [BTW, why do Republicans name-call so much?? Trying to make-up for feelings of inferiority? Or just angry because you lost!? And thanks for the worst 8 years this country has had to endure and for the decades it will take to fix it!!]

Well, shucks, we can't hold a candle to your (I'm assuming you are a Leftie) massive 8+ year record of epithet-spewing assininity. "Chimpy McHitlerBurton" and all that. But since you feel so bad about it, here's a "I'm Sorry" headtilt for ya:

(head tilt, downtrodden face)

Now, FOAD please.

Posted by: cheshirecat at November 18, 2008 10:35 PM (iSoGU)

59 [comment deleted]

Posted by: U.S. Dept of Fairness at November 18, 2008 11:20 PM (p33D8)

60 bob/Farmer Todd/ernesto:

Hey, shithead! Are you that fucking dumb that you think changing your name can fool us?

Posted by: Perry Mason at November 19, 2008 12:03 AM (eruDQ)

61 Damn Texas hating pussies. Do you realize how much Texas directly impacts the World's daily living? Do not bash the Lone Star State. Our current Pres claims to be "from" Texas, but that is different from being born in Texas. Most of you could not even compete for jobs in Austin or Dallas, so please take that shit back to fucking Little Rock or OK. The point is, San Antonio is Military USA baby, we have enough to fuck other countries up so do not dare say NUKE Austin or artsy Dallas.

Posted by: Lucky L at November 19, 2008 12:54 AM (5pi8/)

Willacy is in the Valley and, as such, is in kind of a no-man's land. Combining the decrepit charm of Kingsville with the methamphetimine hovel of Mexia, the region is known to be dominated by a few families, rather, um, familias, who control everything from the bars to the gummint.

My surprise is that Ronnie Earl didn't think of this first.

PS: Odd that the first thing New Yorkers or, especially, Chicagoans, tell you is where they are from, as if geography imbued them with the qualitative stereotype of the city itself. They, in privity of self-regard, hope that it impresses you. We, claiming to be from Texas...know that it will.

PSS. Officer Paddy, for that response to Seattle, I owe you a Shiner.

Posted by: LexisTexas at November 19, 2008 01:06 AM (Vt8uv)

63 You mean good 'ol boys too, forgot about them. No one has even had a Shiner on this board. MMMM good.

Posted by: Lucky L at November 19, 2008 01:44 AM (5pi8/)

64 And stay the hell out of San Antonio damn tourists will overtake our area. We corral you outsiders to the riverwalk while we keep the good parts to ourselves.

Posted by: Lucky L at November 19, 2008 01:45 AM (5pi8/)

65 "I'm not some kind of hippy-dippy moonbeam half-a-fag liberal! I'm from Texas!"

Oh, yeah? Quoth the Gunny:

If you're going to quote the illustrious GySgt Hartman, get it right for the full flavor:

"Holy dogshit! Texas! Only steers and queers come from Texas, Private Cowboy! And you don't look much like a steer to me, so that kinda narrows it down! Do you suck dicks?"

(That even helps keep the "cocksucker" count up.)

Posted by: salfter at November 19, 2008 02:41 AM (1By0F)

No one has even had a Shiner on this board. MMMM good.

Lucky L, you feculent stooge,

Before you retire from HuffPo, put down the bong and creep up to your parents room to make sure they are asleep enough to ingore you huffing your sister's art supplies, make sure, even before you tuck that Kos life-size cardboard cut-out you lifted from the Netroots convention into your JC Penney sailboat-bed (the one that Dad was so proud of that he painted your little name right on the side!), please, and I cannot stress this enough, please...remember that you are, and will likely, always be, and incredible douchebag.

...sweet dreams!

Posted by: LexisTexas at November 19, 2008 02:59 AM (Vt8uv)

67 You sound smart in type but I am sure you are a real loser. Stay out of Texas you losers.

Posted by: Lucky L at November 19, 2008 09:31 AM (5pi8/)

68 I owe you a Shiner.

Is that the same as a knob polishing?

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Hey District Attorney Guerra. You've been invited on an all expense paid hunting trip with the VPOTUS. You might want to drop the indictment in order to save face if you know what I mean.

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