Hillary Rodham-<i>Awesome</i>: Aide Says She Won't "Lay the Wood" to Bush or McCain, Because She's Not the Party's Attack Dog (i.e., the VP); Also Won't Make Strong Case for Obama Either, Because That's Also "Not Her Job" (i.e., She's Not the Nominee)

Hillary Rodham-Awesome: Aide Says She Won't "Lay the Wood" to Bush or McCain, Because She's Not the Party's Attack Dog (i.e., the VP); Also Won't Make Strong Case for Obama Either, Because That's Also "Not Her Job" (i.e., She's Not the Nominee)

So what is her job?

Oh, nothin' much: Just being awesome all day long, that's all.

This again from Carl Cameron on Fox.

Clarification: I had to shorten things for the headline. But the gist is: Yeah, she'll knock the "Bush/McCain" economy, but she won't "lay the wood" to them (not her job), and she'll support Obama, but she's not going to be making the case for Obama (or party unity), because that's also not her job.

So she's announcing "Yeah, I'll do the minimum required of me, but gee, if you wanted me to be an attack dog, you should have made me Veep, and if you wanted my full support of the Democratic nominee, you should have made me the Democratic nominee."

This could be a bit of lowering expectations, so that the Obama cultists don't freak on her if she fails to offer Obama the laurel wreath three times.

On the other hand, she could just be really pissed off.

And really awesome.

Old View of Hillary: Bitchy, Grasping, and Self-Obsessed

New View of Hillary: Delightfully Bitchy, Grasping, and Self-Obsessed

There is no "I" in team.

But her name is Hillary!, not "team," buddy.

(Note I have given her back her exclamation point out of Strange New Respect.)

20 Ways Obama is Snubbing Hillary: Obama could stand to get over himself a bit, too.

Hillary Rambo-Clinton

Slublog on that, of course..

So many pantsuits, so little time...

Go with the teal, Hillary. Teal says "I'm stabbing you in the back, yes, but I'm conflicted about it."

Thanks to TLC.

Update: Drew tells me that the Obama camp has leaked to MSNBC (quelle surprise, which is "what a surprise" in some foreign language ("Gay," I think, from what I can gather from its internet usage)), and they say the speech will be the Greatest Thing Imaginable for Obama.

Way to lower expectations, guys.

So I guess I have to reduce my enthusiasm.

It's possible the aide leaked that threat to Carl Cameron as a shot across the bow over the roll call. And, of course: Money. Hillary wants that money. It's her money; her campaign needs to repay personal loans she granted to it.

"Historic Snub"? The LAT reported on a speech to her supporters today -- a "preview," it's imagined, of Hillary's speech tonight -- and it failed to mention Obama or urge support of him specifically.

She only urged general support for "our nominees."

Okay, now I'm all excited again.

Then again, the speech was made before some women's group, so maybe they woudn't have been a receptive audience for Hillary's appeal to support the young inexperienced guy over the older experienced woman.

Posted by: Ace at 06:27 PM

Comments

1 Sow the fields with salt, Hill. You know you want to.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 26, 2008 06:28 PM (ItxWA)

2 Hillary just sent a thrill up my leg.

Posted by: David Ross at August 26, 2008 06:35 PM (STbIz)

3 Hill, if you do this, I'll paste your face on my inflatable and be spankin' it in the closet, tonight. Promise.

Posted by: George Orwell at August 26, 2008 06:36 PM (/WLDq)

4 This is obviously above Hillary's pay grade.

I am having a blast. I am pinching myself. And McCain, with the ads coming rapid fire?

Too much Awesome to take.

I need a cigarette.

Posted by: Stormy70 at August 26, 2008 06:37 PM (Y+o71)

5 Has Obama offered to help her retire her debts? No? Then why the hell shd she help him?

Posted by: grc at August 26, 2008 06:38 PM (YleVG)

6 I love Hillary. All of a sudden 'n shit.

Posted by: Jeff B. at August 26, 2008 06:39 PM (BWTSB)

7 I'm not buying it. I got suckered with Ted Kennedy and the impression that was given that he'd be in a herculean battle to endorse Obama; he just looked old. This is just going to be more thin gruel.

Posted by: HokiePundit at August 26, 2008 06:39 PM (hNRHU)

8 She should announce her candidacy as an independent (What, with Nader would that be a 4th party candidacy?)

Now that would be His-to-reee!!!!

Posted by: J.J. Sefton at August 26, 2008 06:42 PM (zpaDL)

9 Looks like AoS scooped Allahpundit on this. Or, maybe AP read it and fainted out of pure ecstasy?

Posted by: grc at August 26, 2008 06:43 PM (YleVG)

Oh, nothin' much: Just being awesome all day long, that's all.

Admit it ace, you wanna punch that catchers mitt don't you?

Posted by: wickedpinto at August 26, 2008 06:45 PM (ul7te)

11 "Aides say", maybe?

Posted by: Baron Von Ottomatic at August 26, 2008 06:46 PM (4ZOxD)

12 Wicked - Nice to hear from you again.

Mostly. Still a little creepified, though.

Posted by: Stormy70 at August 26, 2008 06:47 PM (Y+o71)

13 Who's the man? Hillary! that's who.

Posted by: DrewM. at August 26, 2008 06:48 PM (hlYel)

14 I kinda doubt Hillary has laid the wood in a long, long, time.

Posted by: Spartan Fan at August 26, 2008 06:50 PM (7365r)

Aids [sic] Say She Won't "Lay the Wood" to Bush or McCain

Suspicions about Hillary confirmed- It's a man, baby.

Posted by: Hollowpoint at August 26, 2008 06:51 PM (rf03a)

16 The Gnome from Ohio's on now. Weapon-grade crazy. Someone get that guy a quaalude.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 26, 2008 06:53 PM (ItxWA)

17 Correct me if I am wrong, but hasn't Hillary's job since about 1991 been rubbing Bill Clinton's balls while he fucks women half her age, while simultaneously trying to climb over him into the Oval Office?

Posted by: Sharkman at August 26, 2008 06:55 PM (UioS4)

18 Ace, are you going to liveblog to the convention again tonight?

Posted by: Chris at August 26, 2008 07:00 PM (t8LmT)

HA! - but there's been a few of us 'round here who've been saying for goin' on about a year that yes, she's a Total Bitch - but she'd be OUR Total Bitch - as president (and thus, had valid conservative arguments for her election over, well, McCain) ...so, yeah, I'll take delightfully Bitchy, etc.

Posted by: davis,br at August 26, 2008 07:01 PM (zewwG)

20 I'd pay big money to see Hillary wrap her �� thighs around the geeks necck and squeez.

Posted by: Javems at August 26, 2008 07:05 PM (/IQA9)

21 I have to admit I had no respect whatsoever for Hillary prior to this campaign.
I still wouldn't vote for her if my life depended on it, except in the primary of course, but I certainly respect her now. The woman ran one killer second half of a campaign.

Posted by: Rocks at August 26, 2008 07:07 PM (7rbe9)

22 And Yeah! I do fuck Huma. What are you gonna do about it?

Posted by: Hillary! at August 26, 2008 07:07 PM (qAMnO)

23 we'll do a live blog, but closer to the real action... kinda gets tedious after four hours.

Posted by: ace at August 26, 2008 07:08 PM (1WR4H)

McCain/Clinton 08!

Awesomeness Incarnate

Posted by: Immolate at August 26, 2008 07:10 PM (CcY2L)

25 Hey Stormy, what did you think of neuromancer?

Posted by: wickedpinto at August 26, 2008 07:11 PM (ul7te)

26 That is the scariest photoshop I've ever seen.

Posted by: MamaAJ at August 26, 2008 07:14 PM (X6Zdh)

27

I don't give a fuck what anybody says, when Hillary is angry, she is sexy as hell. She glows.

Hot damn!

Posted by: Rev. Dr. E Buzz Miller at August 26, 2008 07:24 PM (vFeQi)

28 THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT!

Posted by: Flounder at August 26, 2008 07:25 PM (Vrb8Q)

29 Wear the Red Hillary! Red means no Red States for you, Barry.

Posted by: sergei at August 26, 2008 07:29 PM (AGMH1)

30 if she fails to offer Obama the laurel wreath three times.

wasn't it be a crown thrice offered to mighty Caesar? or am I missing the reference?

Posted by: toby hussein 928 at August 26, 2008 07:30 PM (evdj2)

31 Nice matching pantsuits! Did Kmart have a sale?

Posted by: misplaced Texan at August 26, 2008 07:32 PM (1OiHj)

32 Posted by: toby hussein 928 at August 26, 2008 07:30 PM (evdj2)

Caesar is more normally pictured with the laurel wreath. Offered the crown 3 times is the Shakespearean version, I believe.

Posted by: lorien1973 at August 26, 2008 07:33 PM (fE4SP)

33 Drew speaks Gay? Is he a native Gay speaker? Or, did he just learn it as part of his junior year abroad?

Posted by: grc at August 26, 2008 07:34 PM (YleVG)

34 Posted by: Immolate at August 26, 2008 07:10 PM (CcY2L)

Finally! Someone agrees with me.

Hillary's speech should be about 2 minutes long:

Screw you all. I'm McCain's Veep - he asked and I accepted. Suck it long. Suck it hard.

McCain follow up with a commercial:

PWN3D.

Posted by: lorien1973 at August 26, 2008 07:35 PM (fE4SP)

35 Let''s see...
Obama = Caesar
Hillary = Marc Antony
Quis Brutus est?

Posted by: George Orwell at August 26, 2008 07:37 PM (/WLDq)

36 Ace, I believe it's quelle surprise........

Posted by: Ken at August 26, 2008 07:46 PM (X+iYA)

37 that was what I call a "homo trap."

Posted by: ace at August 26, 2008 07:48 PM (1WR4H)

38 Ha!

Posted by: JackStraw at August 26, 2008 07:49 PM (VBon8)

39 damn you Ace! grrrrr...........

Posted by: Ken at August 26, 2008 08:01 PM (X+iYA)

I say H!llary should wear the blood red pantsuit with a jeweled dagger for a brooch, right on the lapel-

Hillary, you got fucked over by your party. Show 'em all how payback is done.

Posted by: Jones at August 26, 2008 08:03 PM (KOkrW)

41 Chris and Keith can't stop reporting that Hillary supporter Ed Rendell compared Obama to Adlai Stevenson. Oooff.

Posted by: JackStraw at August 26, 2008 08:06 PM (VBon8)

42 lorien1973 a

LOL.

No, really.

I laughed out loud.

You win.

Best and Funniest Comment in a long, long while.

Just sayin'.

Posted by: MeTooThen at August 26, 2008 08:07 PM (x1wpK)

43 I actually own a jeweled dagger brooch. I'm willing to share.

Posted by: texette at August 26, 2008 08:21 PM (4hsjt)

44 Hie thee doone na Denver!

Posted by: Jones at August 26, 2008 08:23 PM (KOkrW)

45 whatta expect. He didn't help pay off her campaign debt. I mentioned the other day that she probably chokes on the word "Obama" which is where the 'nominee" stuff comes from. I think it will be halarious if she continues that idea thru her speech.

Posted by: GarandFan at August 26, 2008 08:26 PM (eJ32B)

46 The DNC schedule lists a possible Obama remote live shot after Our Girl's speech.

Awkward...

Posted by: runninrebel at August 26, 2008 08:33 PM (qAMnO)

47 Here's to blood on the killin' floor. C'mon Hill, you know you want to....

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at August 26, 2008 08:45 PM (ItxWA)

48 Damn I love that gal when she's got a knife in her hand--and she's sticking it someone who deserves it. You go girl!

Posted by: Michael J. Myers at August 26, 2008 08:57 PM (LZ3cP)

49 Hillary Clinton speech -- drinking game.

Posted by: mesablue at August 26, 2008 09:09 PM (5yNaE)

50 Brutus is Richardson. IIRC it didn't go well for him either.

Posted by: Potosi Joel at August 26, 2008 09:37 PM (TPRbZ)

The Clintons are following the same playbook they used in 2000. Bill was widely criticized for not eagerly endorsing Big Al. His endorsement was, "Yeah, whatever. Vote for this guy." Obama gets the same treatment and goes down hard. Who does that benefit?

Not Mitt Romney.

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