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Global Warming Will Give You AIDS

What fresh hell is this?

JMS snarks They're playing to our fears! It's been noted before but it can't be noted enough: The left is fond of screaming that the right fills the public with "fears," but they've been fear-mongering for 50 (100?) years themselves. The difference? Al Qaeda really did blow up the WTC and Pentagon. But global warming is not going to give you AIDS.

And yet that fanciful bugaboo is apparently a "good fear."

Meanwhile, Instapundit deploys my favorite of his running jokes, as a college apparently punishes an enormously accomplished climatologist for daring to criticize the Cult of Global Warming.

Posted by: Ace at 11:25 AM



Comments

1 Well, they've already tied terrorism with Global Warming -- if we stopped using foreign fossil fuels we wouldn't be meddling in the Middle East, thusly ceasing to create muslim terrorists AND we'd save the planet.

Doesn't planet-saving concern you?


Posted by: Bart at April 29, 2008 11:35 AM (o/is7)

2 Science Damn You, William gray! We will smash out your brains and eat them on our tummehs!

Posted by: Allied Atheists Alliance at April 29, 2008 11:41 AM (PLvLS)

3

I can link a donut I ate in 1984 to AIDS.

chocolate donut >> crumbs >> cockapoo >> diarrhea >> dead grass >> Global Warming >> AIDS.

Posted by: Joanie at April 29, 2008 11:42 AM (Z9tCp)

4

Ahh, Finally!  My two favorite scam scares, joined together!  "AIDS"!  GLOBAL WARMING!  Run for your lives!

What a load of fucking bullshit.

Posted by: Sharkman at April 29, 2008 11:44 AM (UioS4)

5

Warm weather causes sweating,

sweating causes itching

you need to fcuk to satisfy the itch

fcuking causes AIDS.

The Science is settled™.

Posted by: Tushar at April 29, 2008 11:45 AM (IlgNp)

6 Global Warming turned me into a newt!






I got better.

Posted by: DrewM. at April 29, 2008 11:47 AM (hlYel)

7 Hey, you know what else gives you AIDS?


Gay sex.


Posted by: Norm McDonald at April 29, 2008 11:47 AM (o/is7)

8 Wow, global warming is the Superman of the 21st Century, is there nothing it cannot do?

Posted by: Penfold at April 29, 2008 11:47 AM (lF2Kk)

Posted by: Slublog at April 29, 2008 11:49 AM (R8+nJ)

10

So, how many things can be caused by / lead to Global warming?

We are looking for double links. For example:

Watching pron --> leads to 'effluents' --> leads to increased moisture content in air --> forms clouds --> traps heat --> causes global warming.

Global warming --> makes outdoor activities difficlut --> traps you in your house --> leads to boredom --> turning you to watch pron.

Posted by: Tushar at April 29, 2008 11:51 AM (IlgNp)

11 You know what else gives you AIDS?


The U. S. of K-K-K-A.

Posted by: Rev Wright at April 29, 2008 11:52 AM (o/is7)

12 Yet at U.S. universities, threats to the rights of scientists who hold minority viewpoints are generally frowned upon.

Posted by: AndrewsDad at April 29, 2008 11:59 AM (C2//T)

13 Help, I've got Global Warming and I cant get (it) up!

Posted by: Hermit Dave at April 29, 2008 11:59 AM (Tk5HT)

14 We're all gonna die!!!!!!!!

Posted by: GarandFan at April 29, 2008 12:02 PM (N4c1G)

15 Here's the part with which I am unsympathetic: Gray isn't satisfied with being right, he also feels the need to be an obnoxious dick toward the people that disagree with him.  Then he complains that they're coming after him.  Ok, if we've decided to be childish then give this a try: "I'm rubber and you're glue....".

Posted by: too many steves at April 29, 2008 12:02 PM (BIwsj)

16 Will global cooling cure AIDS?

Posted by: polynikes at April 29, 2008 12:09 PM (m2CN7)

17 Typical BS.
They dump him because his PR man is overloaded with work. His PR man is overloaded with work because of what the Doc says. He isn't getting dumped because of what he said, he is getting dumped because his enemies know they can work the PR guy hard enough to get the doc dumped. I see the distinction but I don't see the difference.
How fast would that claptrap defense last if the world's AIDS doctors were being fired because CDC cut out its PR dept?

Posted by: Potosi Joel at April 29, 2008 12:09 PM (TPRbZ)

18 I think the comparison to SARS is particularly apt. After all with any world crisis you get a lot of non-gay Senators traveling to investigate the situation. I have heard that coughing can spread SARS in airports and on airplanes. I suspect using all those airport johns, pardon the expression, would transmit AIDS all to easily, especially among those of us with wide stances.

I am a US Senator, what do you think of that?

Posted by: Larry Craig, Senator at April 29, 2008 12:15 PM (TPRbZ)

19

a simple aspirin will prevent AIDS

 

if you can hold it between your butt cheeks

Posted by: Grog at April 29, 2008 12:16 PM (x67YZ)

20
I'm torn between

"Game over, man!  We're all gonna fucking die!" from Aliens and

"I can't help it.  I have a small dick!" from True Lies

Posted by: My best Bill Paxton imitation at April 29, 2008 12:20 PM (e59Bv)

21 I gotta call bullshit.

After a hard day of chasing down rats in the landfill for the stew pot, which apparently is the future we all will inherit very soon, there isn't much energy left for sex.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at April 29, 2008 12:20 PM (WVUxQ)

22 Dorothy Parker fan, Ace?

Posted by: Robert at April 29, 2008 12:29 PM (hcsKC)

23

Remember the heterosexual AIDS epidemic?

How about acid rain killing off most of our crops?

I can't wait to not remember global warming either.

 

Posted by: Maetenloch (not a maniac) at April 29, 2008 12:35 PM (RKk6P)

24

"But global warming is not going to give you AIDS."

BS, the guvmint gives you AIDS!

Posted by: Rev Wright at April 29, 2008 12:39 PM (Gzb30)

25 Theenk about it, darlinks. Global Varming makes men takes their shirts off and dance, which leads to going back to my place to watch uncensored Abu Ghraib videos and S&M pron, which leads to unprotected sex, vhich leads to AIDS.

It's SCIENCE, you morons!

Posted by: Andrianna Sullington at April 29, 2008 12:49 PM (PLvLS)

26

Ahh, Bill Gray...

On one hand- the guy is an awful colleague- a total dick. He's really hard to be around for more than about 15 minutes. The other thing is, his forecasts for hurricane season are usually pretty inaccurate- check 'em out sometime. Then again, so is most weather forecasting more than 48 hours out.

On the other hand, having gone to school up in that neck of the woods, he's being shown the door because he holds the wrong views. That was being talked about when I was around Fort Collins back in 1999-2000. His forecasts are a cash cow- they draw a ton of funding and PR, and CSU could just as easily hire a 2nd PR lackey to handle Gray's stuff.

That's why I went to Northern Colorado... and CSU may have beaten us in the score, but we beat the crap out of them in the fights department... sorry, good hockey memories.

tmi3rd

Posted by: tmi3rd at April 29, 2008 12:59 PM (9bytU)

27 OMG.  I've heard a lot of preposterous claims being made about GW, but this is by far the most absurd.  Advocates will sink to any level in their pursuit of this nonsense which only gives me more reason to hold the whole thing in utter contempt. 

Posted by: John at April 29, 2008 01:13 PM (smOnY)

28 Sometimes it's just too hot to wear a Jimmy Cap. I blame Exxon for my upcoming death.
...
...
...
Oh, and also assless leather chaps.

Posted by: Seth at April 29, 2008 01:30 PM (txZij)

29

And all this time I thought shooting up and buggering with commie fag junkies gave you AIDS.

Huh.

Posted by: along came Jones at April 29, 2008 01:37 PM (aJtCl)

30 I'm trying to do a drawing of the end of the world on my cave wall....What will GW/AIDS look like, as a cave drawing, that ended life on this planet?

Posted by: hutch1200 at April 29, 2008 01:40 PM (BLLBI)

31 monkeys like it warm

Posted by: tobwing plover at April 29, 2008 01:56 PM (evdj2)

32 No.  Going in through the "Out" door will give you HIV, which will then lead to AIDS.  Not worried here.

Posted by: mikey at April 29, 2008 02:10 PM (GSeVd)

33 No more gay cruising in Escalades? Elitists and runaways hit hardest!

Posted by: hutch1200 at April 29, 2008 02:29 PM (BLLBI)

34 An infected dick in the ass causes AIDS, not an apocalypse.

Posted by: Douger at April 29, 2008 02:35 PM (W85a9)

35

Everyone has AIDS!

AIDS-AIDS-AIDS-AIDS-AIDS-AIDS-AIDS!

Posted by: Lease, the Musical at April 29, 2008 02:42 PM (c767D)

36 They will say anything to get us to belive this global warming poppycock bull kaka thats why those no good lying liberal left-wing journalists this whole GLOBAL WARMING is the biggist fruad in the world and AL GORE should be sent to the black hole of calcutta

Posted by: Spurwing Plover at April 30, 2008 12:36 AM (RYz8s)

37

Better global warming than global ice age!

A few degrees of warmth only expands the earth's region receptive to agricultural crop production.

Whereas, without the warmth, crops are stunted and we starve.

Drudge links to today's NY Times "fertilizer shortage" story by KEITH BRADSHER and ANDREW MARTIN. They report, on behalf of the fertilizer industry and the subsistence level VietCong peasant that there just aren't enough chemicals to go around unless we "build scores of new factories". I found it interesting to note Bradsher-Martin's claim that "Agriculture and development experts say the world has few alternatives to its growing dependence on fertilizer." Agriculture and development experts! That's right, university agriculture departments are now part of the School of Real Estate Development within the College of Engineering! Again, Bradsher-Martin's source? "Jeffrey D. Sachs, the Columbia University economist who has focused on eradicating poverty." So now an economist is the NY Times expert on agriculture and development who promotes unleashing the chemical industry to reproduce chemicals ASAP.

Bradsher-Martin failed to consult an agriculture professor to garner the full picture regarding crop production, relying instead on an economist as the expert on crop production as if the economist is the expert on the overall agricultural effects from total reliance on industrially produced chemical fertilizers, particularly when freely used by uneducated and illiterate peasants. That the economist's research funding is provided by the chemical industry is also not mentioned. But heck, "That’s the difference between life and death."

 

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