Orang-Utan Photographed Spear-Fishing

orangfish.jpg

First time this has ever been seen, say biologists.

Portly Pirate is justifiably worried. We know where this train is headed.

Even Worse: Monkey Sword Fight!

Thanks to JamesR.


Posted by: Ace at 10:39 AM



Comments

1 Oh this is not gonna turn out good.

Posted by: Dave in Texas at April 27, 2008 10:43 AM (9kY8+)

2 I'm not too worried. We will be screwed when lions learn how to make soup.

Posted by: Blarg the Destroyer at April 27, 2008 10:45 AM (2vB4C)

3 be careful, that's how Planet of the Apes got started.

Posted by: canuk at April 27, 2008 10:49 AM (dOOjm)

4 If only Charlton Heston had lived to see this...

Posted by: David Ross at April 27, 2008 10:57 AM (AvUHE)

5 canuk FAIL

Posted by: David Ross at April 27, 2008 10:57 AM (AvUHE)

6 Good thing they haven't learned how to carve perfectly straight spears. I call Bullshit.

Posted by: JavaJoe at April 27, 2008 11:06 AM (Am6n/)

7 Calm down, that's not an orangutan. That's my dad.

Dirty old man. I gotta give him a call and say ixnay on the uditynay, yecch.

Posted by: lauraw at April 27, 2008 11:06 AM (DbybK)

8 David Ross,
I'm beginning to think the orangutans waited until Chuck had passed because they feared what he knew. I question the timing.

Posted by: Nom de Blog at April 27, 2008 11:14 AM (5/uG4)

9 OK two things.


One, he's not using a spear, he's using a stick

Two, he's bashing the water trying to hit a fish with it like a retard with a hammer trying to hit a dog on the head.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at April 27, 2008 11:24 AM (3+3kx)

10 And so it begins.

Posted by: Obama is my anti-drug at April 27, 2008 11:27 AM (sP/O+)

11 B-S....

Posted by: Kasper Hauser at April 27, 2008 11:29 AM (B9Fr/)

12 >>Calm down, that's not an orangutan. That's my dad.

How does this disprove it's and orangutan?

Posted by: JackStraw at April 27, 2008 11:32 AM (t+mja)

13 Lemme know when they start voluntarily wearing pants and deoderant.

Posted by: Joanie at April 27, 2008 11:32 AM (Yyy1m)

14 I hate every ape I see. From chimpan-A to chimpanZEE...

Posted by: brak at April 27, 2008 11:33 AM (lhT15)

15 You're right, Christopher Taylor; he was just mimicking the local fishermen. But if he can do that, how long before he learns to steal a gun, knocks over the local gas station, learns to fly a plane, comes to the USA, and opens a chain of fresh fruit stores that funnel money to terrorist groups?

Your dismissiveness and naivete are breathtaking, sir.

It's a matter of national security now. That ape must be destroyed.

Posted by: lauraw at April 27, 2008 11:34 AM (DbybK)

16 So, apes watch "Survivor Man".

I knew it.


Posted by: eman at April 27, 2008 11:36 AM (0AZ4a)

17 #12 How does this disprove it's and [sic] orangutan?

Very nice. Very nice burn.

Posted by: lauraw at April 27, 2008 11:38 AM (DbybK)

18 I, for one, etc. etc.


Posted by: alexthechick at April 27, 2008 11:39 AM (uGN3f)

19
Calm down, that's not an orangutan. That's my dad.

Now we know from where you get your good looks.






(I keed! I keed!)

Posted by: OregonMuse at April 27, 2008 11:40 AM (OfPPb)

20 While I've never actually seen Ace nude, this hirsute creature looks sufficiently Ewokish that I can't say for sure that it's not Ace.

Posted by: Nordbuster at April 27, 2008 11:40 AM (4W/k9)

21 >>Lemme know when they start voluntarily wearing pants and deoderant.

Voluntarily? You know nothing about men.

Posted by: JackStraw at April 27, 2008 11:48 AM (t+mja)

22 It obviously looks more like he lost his car keys in the water and is trying to retrieve them using a pole.

Spear fishing......puhleez

Posted by: JavaJoe at April 27, 2008 11:49 AM (Am6n/)

23 Damn... that stick is suspiciously straight isn't it?

I suppose it might be a human-made stick like a broomhandle he found.

Posted by: ace at April 27, 2008 11:49 AM (SXBHu)

24 I bet he got it from one of the fishermen somehow.

Posted by: lauraw at April 27, 2008 11:51 AM (DbybK)

25
It's a matter of national security now. That ape must be destroyed.


I'm convinced, where can I send money?

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at April 27, 2008 12:03 PM (3+3kx)

26 Whether spear fishing or slapping the water with a stick, it looks like fun.

Posted by: Guy Ritchie's Career at April 27, 2008 12:13 PM (bbknS)

27 Reminds me of this:
Dolphins Evolve Opposable Thumbs
'Oh, Shit,' Says Humanity

Posted by: Brendan at April 27, 2008 12:14 PM (2jQGY)

28 <i>"
One, he's not using a spear, he's using a stick

Two, he's bashing the water trying to hit a fish with it like a retard with a hammer trying to hit a dog on the head."</i>

You're the retard, Christopher Taylor. Seriously, you are such a stupid Christian monkey I'm embarrassed to be on the same internet with you.

The orang-utan, on the other hand, is cool.

Posted by: Christoph at April 27, 2008 12:31 PM (hawOV)

29 Orangutans are the nice primates. From what Ihave read our closestrelative isthe chimp, which are very nasty animals,but ifyou were to liveyour life withouthaving to deal with the chimp-ishbehaviorofother humans itwouldprobably bepretty similar toan Orangutan. In a perfect world the averagemanwouldbe happy to build a nice nest, eat lots of foodand find adecent woman tosettle down with.
*channels Rev.Wright's mad preaching skills*
No NO No!!!
It's chimpanzee time forhumans. If you weretoseparate primates intogroupsbased on behaviorchimpsandhumans would have to go stay in thebad groupwith eachother. Even if youare a nice as an orangutan,you still endup gettingbeatentodeath and eaten by your fellow chimpsor perhapstortured for a while,maybe peoplepouringacid on you, andkilled byyour fellow humans.

Posted by: bleh at April 27, 2008 12:34 PM (GNCy6)

30 Get your stick off me, you damn dirty ape!

Posted by: Stanley Fish at April 27, 2008 12:35 PM (SXTZQ)

31 well i'm not worried. we haven't seen the next frame --- the one that shows you can't spear fish without thumbs.

Posted by: zoey at April 27, 2008 12:38 PM (KU4Si)

32 You're the retard, Christopher Taylor. Seriously, you are such a stupid Christian monkey I'm embarrassed to be on the same internet with you.


On behalf of all Christians on the internet I apologize for being insufficiently monkey-sensitive and ape-concerned. Certainly I need sensitivity training so that my anti-simian tendencies are stamped out. Maybe there's a camp I could go to, someplace I could work in, and be re-educated.

Posted by: Christopher Taylor at April 27, 2008 12:44 PM (3+3kx)

33 Apology accepted, Mr. Taylor. And no offense taken. BTW, do you have any relatives named George from Fort Wayne?

Posted by: The Rev. Dr. Zaius at April 27, 2008 12:55 PM (AS2IX)

34 Even if it is real that is not a wild orangutan. I have watched that show and the orangutans do lots ofthings thatarenotconsidered typical orangutan behavior(ie: walking aroundin thejungleratherthantravelingthrough trees)
Maybe it isoneof these rehab orangutans:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSQtlWwY4eg

Posted by: bleh at April 27, 2008 01:05 PM (GNCy6)

35 Damn... that stick is suspiciously straight isn't it?
Bamboo grows like that naturally.

Posted by: jic at April 27, 2008 01:11 PM (uj41x)

36 How do we know that it is the monkey that is the one using the spear? Maybe it is a very smart Sea Bass hunting monkeys? Yes, fish have no hands or opposable thumbs but that fact is exactly why such a feat would be all the more impressive...

Posted by: dri at April 27, 2008 01:16 PM (qu/jV)

37 Read the story guys. The orangatun didn't come up with the idea. He got it from fisherman he'd seen. And is using it to get fish out of a net.

There's a huge difference, here. This is simply a case of monkey see, monkey do.

Posted by: lorien1973 at April 27, 2008 01:37 PM (sykfx)

38 Yeah...I dunno. My BS detector went off the minute I looked at it.
It's allready been said, but the first 2 thoughts in my head were that the stick was too damn straight, and is heactually spear fishingwith it, or just smacking at the surface of the water making nifty splashes.

Posted by: Entropy at April 27, 2008 01:38 PM (HgAV0)

39 In related news, China is diverted its blockaded arms shipment from Mugabe to the oranguatans.

I wish I could remember the source, but I read once that if you showed the same tool to a chimp, a gorilla and an orangutan, the chimp would use it as a club, the gorilla would be scared of it, and the orangutan would mess around with it until he figured out how it worked.

No word on whether they can make the VCR clock stop blinking.

Posted by: richard mcenroe at April 27, 2008 01:38 PM (l3IrE)

40 Thirteen hundred orangutans went into the water that night.

Posted by: Quint in Texas at April 27, 2008 02:05 PM (eiOZw)

41 Better"take care" ofthe fisherman- just to be safe.

Posted by: jjshaka at April 27, 2008 02:10 PM (O9NFd)

42 I don't know why some of you are so surprised. If the retards over at DU can operate a blog, an orangutan can catch a fish.

Posted by: JackStraw at April 27, 2008 02:15 PM (t+mja)

43 Alright people, you can stop worrying now about a possible super ape take over. It's just an image from the E hollywood true story of Clyde the Orangutan and his descent from one time fabulous Hollywood star toa washed up has-beenthat has to spear fish in order to stay alive now that Clint Eastwood has moved onto bigger and better things. It gets really bad when they show him huffing paint.

Posted by: Darth Randall at April 27, 2008 02:16 PM (oLULt)

44 BS, folks. Orang-utans don't eat fish. Look it up. They're herbivores mostly, along with some insects-- grubs, termites, etc. Nice try.

BTW they're primates, not monkeys.

Posted by: Bat Chain Puller at April 27, 2008 02:22 PM (4kLDR)

45 Thanks for the linkage, Ace.

Posted by: Robert at April 27, 2008 02:30 PM (hcsKC)

46 The spear fishing orangutan needs to meet up with the bartender monkeys and open a restaurant.

Posted by: Long Island at April 27, 2008 02:31 PM (iDUVX)

47 Me think this no good. Boy what u think?

Posted by: Tarzan at April 27, 2008 03:25 PM (K2Ig0)

48 Screw that monkey. I'll bash him in the head with my rock.

Posted by: Sea Otter at April 27, 2008 04:22 PM (GczzL)

49 An Orang Utan is an ape, a primate, and not a monkey.

This one should be more careful. His Blackberry could fall into the water.

Posted by: eman at April 27, 2008 05:08 PM (0AZ4a)

50 "There's a huge difference, here. This is simply a case of monkey see, monkey do."
And that's different from how people have learned to do most things how?

Posted by: buzzion at April 27, 2008 05:15 PM (FL/94)

51 A primate playing with his pole...and this is the first time scientists have observed this?

Posted by: art at April 27, 2008 06:03 PM (Ls0RD)

52 "I'm convinced, where can I send money?"
Send it to me, I promise it willbe used foranti-super-ape technology.
Well, that and Val-U-Rite.

Posted by: gebrauchshund at April 27, 2008 06:08 PM (pY77a)

53 Dare I say it? Fishing for votes.

Posted by: Bid Swede at April 27, 2008 07:43 PM (xEn0I)

54 Fishing? Yea right. He's going after a 6-pack that some other idiots upstream let fall into the water.

Posted by: Purple Avenger at April 27, 2008 09:45 PM (WVUxQ)

55 Heh.
Caption: Orangutan makes attempt at constructing primitive bridge.

Posted by: Entropy at April 27, 2008 11:23 PM (HgAV0)

56 What's this "he" business? That's a lady orangutan. The male orangutans are a lot bigger and have leathery growths on the sides of their faces.

Posted by: David Ross at April 28, 2008 12:31 AM (AvUHE)

57 That's one straight stick! No knobs from branches or anything. Must have stole a broomstick from the local village.

Posted by: harleycowboy at April 28, 2008 08:17 AM (U8gb+)

58 I suppose those evolutionists wackos will claim this is proof humans decended from the apes WHAT A LOAD OF BULL KAKA and they tave a bird in the galapagos that uses a cactus spine to get grubs out of dead wood and in africa theres the EGYPTIAN VULTURE that breaks open ostrich eggs using a stone. and hey peta orangatangs eat fish they just love it

Posted by: Spurwing Plover at April 28, 2008 10:38 AM (1lnbE)

59 Hookie-bookie Borneo eh?
I'll speculate that this orang has been clandestinely watching old Lloyd Bridges BW TV "Sea Hunt" reruns in one of thelocal villages.


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Posted by: satellite receiver at June 21, 2011 04:11 AM (+L67n)






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