Hawaii, the forgotten primary.

Today, the great state of Hawaii goes to the polls. On the Democratic side, there are 20 delegates at stake in that race. For comparison purposes, great all-important New Hampshire only offers 22.

And yet, no one is mentioning Hawaii. It's all "Wisconsin this" and "Texas and Ohio that". I, for one, refuse to allow this slight to continue. I mean, really. Where would you rather be? Madison freakin Wisconsin surrounded by fat, pasty, cheese-gargling moonbats, or Honolulu, Hawaii surrounded by sexy hula dancers? That's what I thought.

Sure, Hawaii is Barack Obama's home state. And he should win convincingly. But does that mean we should ignore this primary? Of course not. You know who wants you to forget about it though? Hillary Clinton. You don't want to be played by Hillary Clinton do you?

Of course you don't. So let's give a shout out to our countrymen on the Islands. After all, they gave us Don Ho, Jack Lord, a bitching TV theme song, and the coolest ferrari driving Private Investigator of all time.

3 of these 4 men are voting against Hillary Clinton. The other is a stinkin' limey.

So here's to you, Hawaii! May Pele keep the lava at bay (except in Clinton strongholds). This is one haole who would never forget you.

Posted by: Jack M. at 01:40 PM

Comments

1 HIGGIN'S!!!!!

Posted by: Paladin at February 19, 2008 01:46 PM (bWB5j)

2 What? You mean you aren't happy, content, and snuggly-warm allowing The Deciders to determine what is important to the American voter?

How...how...intellectually independent of you!

Posted by: Steamboat McGoo at February 19, 2008 01:46 PM (41Dd+)

"3 of these 4 men are voting against Hillary Clinton. The other is a stinkin' limey."

Mahalo for the nose blast laugh!

Posted by: 7% Solution at February 19, 2008 01:49 PM (ZWxLw)

4 Actually, Higgins was not a limey. Did it convincingly, though. I think he's actually from Texas, without IMDB'ing it...

Posted by: lauraw at February 19, 2008 01:50 PM (7bcKx)

5 Whatevahs braddah.

We got de like kine powah. We say Hawaii da junk primary, nuff already.

What? You got problems? Like beef?

Posted by: The Deciders at February 19, 2008 01:54 PM (R8+nJ)

6 John Hillerman's a Texan, by the way.

I'm just sayin'....

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 19, 2008 01:54 PM (Ds4I5)

7 I hate being second, lauraw.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 19, 2008 01:55 PM (Ds4I5)

For a second there I thought you said "3 out of 4 of these guys are ghey", and I was about to hit the Google to find out which one is lying...

Posted by: WunderKraut at February 19, 2008 01:57 PM (b9z7O)

Actually, Higgins was not a limey. Did it convincingly, though. I think he's actually from Texas, without IMDB'ing it...

Hey, do I come into your threads and fact check your ass? I didn't think so.

(By the way, I like it....the safety word is "Aloha").

Posted by: Jack M. at February 19, 2008 01:59 PM (b96e6)

10 Jack M.

You can take your audacious hope and shove it where the sun don't shine. The only real hope for Amerikkka is the divine mendacity of our Lady of Chappaqua.

Our only real hope is hopelessness.

Posted by: Kasper Hauser at February 19, 2008 02:06 PM (KeOQp)

11 Dog The Bounty Hunter show ruined Hawaii for me. Nothing but ice and bums in Hawaii once you leave the hotel.

Posted by: polynikes at February 19, 2008 02:15 PM (m2CN7)

Aw, Kaspar, I don't have any audacious hope. And I hate change. And healing. I am happy as a hopeless, unchanging man of vast social infirmity.

So I got that going for me. Which is nice.

Posted by: Jack M. at February 19, 2008 02:16 PM (b96e6)

13 20 for me and none for thee...B.I.I.I.O.T.C.H

Posted by: Barak Obama at February 19, 2008 02:20 PM (ERV3B)

Dog The Bounty Hunter show ruined Hawaii for me. Nothing but ice and bums in Hawaii once you leave the hotel.

Dog's show is based on Oahu in the Honolulu-hood, which does suck. Plus, he's chasing PEOPLE WHO HAVE SKIPPED BAIL so you aren't likely to see anything but the dregs of society anyway.

But spend some time on Maui, Kauai or the Big Island and your perspective will change quite a bit. I wouldn't want to live on Oahu (because it is really dominated by Honolulu), but I'd live on any of the 3 islands I listed. Princeville, Kauai is really beautiful (but isolated). If you want the comforts of a larger town Lahaina, Maui is a lot of fun.

Posted by: Jack M. at February 19, 2008 02:23 PM (b96e6)

15 Where would you rather be? Madison freakin Wisconsin surrounded by fat, pasty, cheese-gargling moonbats,[...]

That's where I am

Posted by: tehdinj at February 19, 2008 02:25 PM (9KZ7w)

16 I was half kidding JackM because I know not all of the islands / Hawaii are like what is depicted on the show. But I am also like probably 90% of America and had never thought of the bad parts as it didn't fit my fantasy framework.

Posted by: polynikes at February 19, 2008 02:33 PM (m2CN7)

Thomas Magnum.

*sigh*

Posted by: kevlarchick at February 19, 2008 02:37 PM (TNuqz)

18 Dog The Bounty Hunter show ruined Hawaii for me. Nothing but ice and bums in Hawaii once you leave the hotel.

Oahu's been like that for decades. Back in '76, Ilima Junior High in Ewa Beach had armed guards and lots of gang activity (including throwing students off of the second story balconies during gang fights). It was partitioned like cold war Berlin in paradise, with the library as the only neutral territory.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 19, 2008 03:00 PM (Ds4I5)

19 It is rather shocking to the uninitiated that outside the touristy areas, much of Oahu is a ghetto.

Posted by: Nick Byram at February 19, 2008 03:09 PM (ujg0T)

20 Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 19, 2008 03:00 PM (Ds4I5)

Sounds like Campbell High School in Ewa Beach, where I was unfortunate enough to attend in the late 80s. Oh, the joys of "Kill Haole Day."

Posted by: Slublog at February 19, 2008 03:30 PM (R8+nJ)

21 Bloody hell, I'm voting against that ill tempered woman.

Posted by: Jonathan Quayle Higgins III at February 19, 2008 03:36 PM (1hM1d)

22 Sounds like Campbell High School in Ewa Beach, where I was unfortunate enough to attend in the late 80s. Oh, the joys of "Kill Haole Day."

I think that Campbell used to be on the present-day Ilima grounds.

Ilima had "Kill Haole Day" as well. We called it "Tuesday".

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 19, 2008 03:39 PM (Ds4I5)

Where would you rather be? Madison freakin Wisconsin surrounded by fat, pasty, cheese-gargling moonbats, or Honolulu, Hawaii surrounded by sexy hula dancers? That's what I thought.

Unfortunately, it's not where I want to be that matters, it's the fact that I'm in the fucking freezer here in the land of ice cream and iced beer. Of course, the good news is I don't have to worry about the beer getting warm, or the moonbats showing up (I'm a safe distance away from Madistan).

If you want to stay up until 1:30 or 2 in the morning to figure out how many delegates Obama locked up, fine by me. My dumb ass will be in a toasty bed.

Posted by: steveegg at February 19, 2008 03:41 PM (LvEFt)

24 The press thinks we don't have the attention span to focus on all of the . . . oooo look an article on this site on the PS3, I have to check it out.

Posted by: David at February 19, 2008 03:41 PM (NgoAe)

25 Ilima had "Kill Haole Day" as well. We called it "Tuesday".

Heh. I only spent a semester in that hole. Enough time, though, to be the lucky recipient of a few random punches in the hall. Fun stuff.

In the few months I was there, three classrooms were firebombed. One was completely destroyed, the other two only moderately damaged.

Posted by: Slublog at February 19, 2008 03:49 PM (R8+nJ)

26 I thought Hawaii belonged to Japan.

Posted by: ricpic at February 19, 2008 04:31 PM (wgcEH)

27 None of this covert racism stuff for Hawaiins. It's all out hate haoles day everyday.

Posted by: ricpic at February 19, 2008 04:33 PM (wgcEH)

28 I thankfully live far from the UW as well, where there are enough slim, pretty conservatives amidst the snowdrifts.

I do gargle with cheese, though, usually after a sixpack of Leinie's. Delicious, delicious cheese.

Posted by: catbat at February 19, 2008 04:42 PM (uAxIr)

29

I thought Hawaii belonged to Japan.

The Nazis, stupid. They took it after they bombed Pearl Harbor.

Posted by: Steve (aka Ed Snate) at February 19, 2008 05:18 PM (/9+36)

The Nazis, stupid. They took it after they bombed Pearl Harbor.

I hate Japanese Nazis.

Posted by: Some guy who only watches movies starring Belushi at February 19, 2008 05:25 PM (b96e6)

31 Why do these little offshore foreign places like Guam, Hawaii, and Rhode Island get to have a say in our primary process?

Posted by: stace at February 19, 2008 05:38 PM (4x6iT)

32 Why do these little offshore foreign places like Guam, Hawaii, and Rhode Island get to have a say in our primary process?

Because they want to be like Mexico.

Posted by: IllTemperedCur at February 19, 2008 06:04 PM (Ds4I5)

Ah Beautiful Hawaii,

When I visited the islands 5 years ago, they were still leaving sacrifices* at the historic site of their old temples. I had some fascinating discussions with the locals. Wonderful and beautiful people, but some of them are extremely superstitious.

Of course this isn't proof of how many practice the old religion. But,the individuals I meet exhibted a strong belief that angry ghosts physically removed heavy road construction equipment to the opposite site of their island.

*(veggies and flowers, no virgins)

Crossposted on new comments before I realized the discussion was over here

Posted by: Ragnell at February 19, 2008 06:21 PM (xQaCP)

^{3 of these 4 men are voting against Hillary Clinton. The other is a stinkin' limey.}

BUT WHAT WAY DID THE 'STACHE GO?

Posted by: TheEJS at February 19, 2008 07:30 PM (Fi2LQ)

35 I spent 3 weeks in Oahu, never got bored. Went marlin fishing off Kona, and spent the night there. Went absolutely positively batshit insane from boredom.
The next day I saw the volcano and repeated the insanity part in Hilo

Posted by: Vmaximus at February 19, 2008 08:53 PM (9P95k)

So much for the content of your post. I was lost at the pic of Tom Selleck.

I'd like to see a remake of Magnum P.I., but it should be a campy, Brady-type of remake. Otherwise, they'll put some fuck like Ben Afleck in there and just screw up the whole damned thing.

I heard some time ago that Afleck was going to remake Hawaii Five-0. What ever happened to that?

Posted by: jmflynny at February 19, 2008 09:13 PM (l25Zd)

There are plenty of places on Oahu that are incredibly wonderful, with great people and lots of fun stuff to do, that never includes touristy Waikiki.

Because it doesn't fit some mainland "wicky-wacky hula" dream of how Hawaii and the residents "should" be, is plenty of reason for me to have enjoyed living there for many years.

This haole (military, even!) lived in Ewa Beach, Aiea, Kalihi. My whole family enjoyed ourselves with our local neighbors, and my kidlets never had a problem at Ilima and Campbell High . . . though our experience was likely different since we didn't spend much time looking down our noses at the folks who lived there long before us. That, alone, bought us a lot of good will.

Still read the Honolulu Star-Bulletin, call our old neighbors, and visit with them when we go back for various events.

Posted by: Claudia at February 20, 2008 12:21 AM (4gHqM)

You do know that "limey" is actually from Texas??

Posted by: Gen.William Tecumseh Sherman at February 22, 2008 03:44 AM (blNMI)

39 I love Hawaii. I have lived on Oahu for 7 plus years. One thing is for sure, there is no shortage of the ghetto minded brainless thug types here: 1.They don't know how to drive 2.Are some of the rudest people I have ever met. 3.Threaten you for just looking in their direction 4.Combined, their IQ probably equals that of a dead cockroach. 5.Whats with the "Ah crack you!" ?..never figured that out. 6.Wish they would take their "local bruddah bravado macho bullshit and just be nice to others. 7.I love the place, and I just tolerate the stupid ghetto monkeys. Aloha.

Posted by: scott at March 07, 2008 10:30 PM (9gG3L)

40 wedding dresses wedding gowns bridal gowns lace front wigs wedding invitations bridal shower invitations baby shower invitations custom wedding invitation diablo 2 cd key

Posted by: saa at September 02, 2008 04:06 AM (P/kOD)

41 Welcome to wow gold our wow Gold and wow power leveling store. We wow gold are specilized, wow power leveling professional and reliable wow power leveling website for wow power leveling selling and wow gold service. By the world of warcraft gold same token,we offer wow power leveling the best WoW service wow power leveling for our long-term and wow powerleveling loyal customers. wow powerleveling You will find wow powerleveling the benefits and value powerlevelingwe created powerleveling different from other sites. As to most people, power leveling they are unwilling to power leveling spend most of wow power leveling the time wow gold grinding money Rolex for mounts or rolex replica repair when replica rolex they can purchase Watches Rolex what they Rolex Watches are badly need. The Watch Rolex only way is to look Rolex Watch for the best place RS Gold to buy Cheap WARHAMMER ONLINE GOLD. Yes! You find it here! Our WoW Gold supplying service has already accumulated a high reputation and credibility. We have plenty of Gold suppliers, which will guarantee our delivery instant. Actually, we have been getting RuneScape Gold tons of postive feedbacks from our loyal RuneScape Money customers who really appreciate our service.

Posted by: wow power leveling at January 20, 2009 03:10 AM (jlcze)

42 Gucci Loafers Gucci Sneakers UGGs Louis Vuitton Handbags Gucci Shoes Louis Vuitton UGG Boots Louis Vuitton Handbags gucci shoes

Posted by: mm at April 17, 2009 05:02 AM (GUOBt)

43 Greeting. Nothing changes your opinion of a friend so surely as success - yours or his. Help me! It has to find sites on the: Arizona car trader. I found only this - renters insurance company. Instant cash advance relief to pay for. H quick rule guide in portuguese for cash guns guia pido de regras em portugu. With best wishes

, Zamiel from Timor.

Posted by: Zamiel at July 30, 2009 07:37 AM (D2H7j)

44 links of london
london links jewellery
links jewellers
london links
links necklaces
links bracelet
links charms
links rings
links earrings

Posted by: linksfromlondon at October 02, 2009 12:46 AM (x6SNH)

Posted by: retailike at October 17, 2009 01:50 PM (zFgZJ)

46 Buy Discount ugg shoes
ugg boots
boot ugg
mbt shoes
nike running shoes
cheap nike shoes
nike footwear
cheap nike footwear
nike air max shoes
FREE SHIPPING!

Posted by: NIKE AIR MAX at October 27, 2009 06:54 PM (sS5lD)

47 discount Discount Boots
Womens UGG
UGG Shoes
UGG Australia
UGG UK
UGG USA
discount ugg boots
cheap ugg boots
air force 1 shoes
Nike air force
air force 1 mens
air force 1 boots
air force onefree shipping

Posted by: discount ugg boots at November 01, 2009 02:58 AM (MlIdd)

48 buy air force 1 shoes
Nike air force
air force 1 mens
air force 1 boots
air force one
UGG Boots
UGG Australia
UGG Shoes
UGG Sale
Cheap UGG
mbt cheap
mbt sale
mbt uk
mbt shoes cheap
buy mbt shoes
shoes mbt saleform usa

Posted by: airforceoneshop at November 09, 2009 02:29 AM (4uuE9)

Posted by: ugg boots at November 14, 2009 06:47 AM (s7MB5)

Posted by: replica watches at November 17, 2009 07:08 AM (xpuiO)

Posted by: replica watches at November 17, 2009 08:39 AM (xpuiO)

Posted by: replica watches at November 18, 2009 06:09 AM (C/zDM)

Posted by: replica watches at November 18, 2009 08:52 PM (C/zDM)

54 The proper function of man is to live, but not to exist.ugg classic cardyConquer fear of death and you are put into possession of your life. ugg classic tallThere is a time to speak and a time to be silent. ugg knightsbridgefree shippingmbt cheap
mbt sale
mbt uk
mbt shoes cheap
buy mbt shoes
shoes mbt sale

Posted by: mbtshoesbuy at November 25, 2009 02:07 AM (fd1jz)

Posted by: replica watches at December 04, 2009 09:20 AM (bsW/x)

56 I will have a hard time buying ugg classic cardy at normal brick and mortar store for now on knowing that I can browse the largest selection I have ever seen and purchase confidently. Thanks for being a great company.Although your ugg boots cardy website is entered by users, the site has a lot of accurate and useful information on it.your net shop is kept to a minimum and favours websites connected to the ugg cardy boots Web Design Library in appearance and subject.
The popular blue ugg is renowned for its comfort. But some doctors worry that the popular black ugg could cause serious foot pain in the long run.So some podiatrists across the country are telling ugg classic cardy lovers to watch their steps. In fact,there is nothing wrong!
The crochet boots online retailer also knows bargain-hungry shoppers are scouring the Web for discounts, and its UGG Classic Crochet rivals are more than happy to provide them. So it is putting coupon codes on ugg classic crochet that customers can use to save money on its site.

Posted by: makol UGG at December 05, 2009 09:18 AM (cmMdO)

57 The womens mbtchallenges the hard to reach
muscles in your legs, but also works the abdominal, back, buttock, and thigh muscles.
With every stride, the instability activates the whole body in concert and tones as it
stimulates different areas.mbt
footwear have a curved pivot sole that copies walking on soft moss. The sole of
href=http://www.mbtshoesbuy.com/products_new.html>new mbt turns even, flat ground
into uneven terrain. The mbt anti shoes challenges the muscles to work harder with
every step you take. The unique curved sole works by providing instability and makes
the muscles of your body more engaged and also helps burn more calories.
The mbt shoes walking shoes have been
highlighted for its ability to cushion your feet while challenging your muscles.
Clinical studies suggest that regular use improves balance, posture and circulation.
mbt lami shoes re-establish
the natural conditions for standing and walking.You will get more results out of your
workouts ? MBT shoes have technology in the sole design that make your working more
efficient and burn more calories. With every step, the instability activates your
muscles and the whole body is stimulated as your walk more and more.Free Shipping
1Week on Select Styles Of discount
mbt Walking Shoes Reviews !

Posted by: mbtshoesbuy at December 09, 2009 04:37 PM (B0M1x)

Posted by: rolex watches at December 17, 2009 07:08 AM (EGD2i)

59 Nike Air Max
hot sale nike shoes
nike air
buy Air Max shoes
nike max air

Posted by: cheap Air Max at December 25, 2009 11:51 AM (ZgK+c)

Posted by: nike air max at January 20, 2010 04:32 PM (CZv6h)

Posted by: air max shoes at January 28, 2010 05:26 AM (JOSIc)

62 Factors Replica Watches About The Rolex replica watches Oyster The Oyster is so closely get in touch with Rolex, and it is inevitably that some people think these are the only Replica watches Rolex manufacture. Others suppose that there is a single Oyster watch. But as a matter of fact, the name Oyster does not actually meant for a rolex Watches particular watch you can buy rolex watches or even to a series but to a type of case that available in some of the Rolex ranges. History The Oyster case was first released in 1926. The objective was to protect the workings of the watch from dust and moisture. Early watches were far from waterproof. The Oyster tag heuer Watchescase was an tag heuer watches innovative design to eliminate these problems. It had a new double locking crown that screwed into place. It has been compared to the hatch on a submarine. Like a submarine, the Oyster case was waterproof. In 1927 Mercedes Gleitze swam the English breitling Watches Channel breitling watches . Before she set off she was presented with a Rolex Oyster. When she arrived, the watch was still working perfectly. The resulting publicity gave the new case a massive boost. Why is it called Oyster? Legend has it that Hans cartier Watches Wilsdorf cartier watches, who invented the Oyster, chose the name because the new case reminded him of the difficulty he had experienced prising open oysters at dinner. Since then the Oyster has further, particularly advanced. Many Oyster watches today are omega Watches perpetual-self-winding, in other omega watches words, it does not require to expose the mechanism to the outside world in order to wind it. The Osyter Perpetual is one of the toughest, most durable, most reliable watches (under truly adverse conditions). It is probably the best mechanical watch money can buy.

Posted by: replica watches at February 05, 2010 09:22 PM (TUJDt)

Processing 0.04, elapsed 0.0373 seconds.
15 queries taking 0.0066 seconds, 71 records returned.
Page size 78 kb.
Powered by Minx 0.7 alpha.