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Test Measuring Ability To Type A Single Letter Conclusive Proves: Liberals Nuanced, Conservatives Stupid

One might think that true close-minded stupidity was being demonstrated by such a test and the ludicrous claims it makes based on something so trivial, but that's just the sort of stupidity I'd expect from you morons.

Participants were college students whose politics ranged from “very liberal” to “very conservative.” Scientists instructed them to tap a keyboard when an M appeared on a computer monitor and to refrain from tapping when they saw a W.

M appeared four times more frequently than W, conditioning participants to press a key in knee-jerk fashion whenever they saw a letter.

Each participant was wired to an electroencephalograph that recorded activity in their anterior cingulate cortex, the part of the brain that detects conflicts between a habitual tendency (pressing a key) and a more appropriate response (not pressing the key). Liberals had more brain activity and made fewer mistakes than conservatives when they saw a W, researchers said. Liberals and conservatives were equally accurate in recognizing M…

...

Sulloway said the results could explain why President Bush demonstrates a single-minded commitment to the Iraq war and Sen. John F. Kerry, the liberal Massachusetts Democrat who opposed Bush in the 2004 presidential race, was accused of being a flip-flopper for changing his mind about the conflict.

Based on the results, he said, liberals could be expected to more readily accept new social, scientific or religious ideas.

“There is ample data from the history of science showing that social and political liberals indeed do tend to support major revolutions in science,” said Sulloway, who has written about the history of science and has studied behavioral differences between conservatives and liberals.

I hope Allah forgives me from stealing almost all of his link, but I had to.

Exit question three (see Allah for first two): How, precisely, does following idiotic rules to perform a tedious test prove that one is in fact more highly mentally adaptable?

Exit question four: If the results came out the other way -- with liberals screwing up periodically, and conservatives slavishly following the simple-minded rules for the tedious, useless test, what do you suppose the odds are these researchers would have claimed that liberals inability to push keys proved in fact they were dreamers and more imaginative and more courageously free-thinking, and that conservatives were robotically efficient at performing such trivial repetitive tasks precisely due to the limitations of their troglodytic retard-brains?

Posted by: Ace at 10:48 PM



Comments

1 Self-confidence really isn't the strong point of the left, is it?

Posted by: Slublog at September 09, 2007 10:58 PM (xMatq)

2 So the essence of this test is that the liberal mind can be easily preoccupied with senseless rules while the conservative mind is busy multitasking; that is, liberals follow the rules they're given, conservatives make their own rules.

Would that we could impart this knowledge on the house and senate leadership.

Posted by: kevin at September 09, 2007 11:01 PM (xHPOo)

3

W

fuck

W

fuck!

W

goddammit

 

Posted by: Dave in Texas at September 09, 2007 11:09 PM (FXakj)

4 Crap stories like this are always printed when the left realizes that they are losing.
Hilary and Obama are not the saviors they are realizing with swing in events in Iraq. Their entire platform is crumbling underthem, so they go with the "vote for us because we are smarter than you" platform,

Posted by: GTBurns at September 09, 2007 11:47 PM (iInYK)

5 Yup, pressing a key on a keyboard proves that we are dumb and liberals are smart.

I would like to see this experiment done on other groups of people.  How about members of different races?  Gays vs straights vs bisexuals (I personally think the bis would lose as they would prefer both keys the same), how about that?  I know, the perfect test of the AoSHQ Lifestyle, scandis vs. hobos.

After we've recreated the tests we could assign broad and wide-ranging postulations that don't take into account other things that could have an outcome on the results.  Such as, I don't know, one group may have a higher propensity against the boredom on some inane test that actually proves nothing.  We'll totally ignore that.

Maybe, just maybe, if these "scientists" who study neurobiology quit with this silly shit and get to doing some real research we can finally unlock the ultimate power of the brain.  Telekinesis.  That or have porn streamed directly into our brains that also effects the other senses such as smell (well, maybe not smell) and touch.  I would settle for either.

Posted by: former republican at September 09, 2007 11:52 PM (I+C25)

6 In an equally significant study, my high score on Tetris remains unrivaled by any liberal students at my college to this day.

Posted by: AD at September 09, 2007 11:57 PM (mAZHM)

7 Liberals have, for the past few years, been training themselves to reject "W" in any context.

Posted by: right at September 10, 2007 12:01 AM (9gh6R)

8 Well, the test could also demonstrate that researches can get grant money for anything.


Posted by: alexthechick at September 10, 2007 12:08 AM (JNoUw)

9 I need to come up with some stupid idea that I can pass off for research. I could use some of that yummy grant money. I could get me a Porsche with that kind of loot.

Posted by: Privileged White Man at September 10, 2007 12:21 AM (blNMI)

10 So people without a "W" on their keyboards are unable to type "W" when told not to. Who'd a thunk?

(http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qn4155/is_20010124/ai_n9605333)

And people who have, or have had, an affinity for "W" sometimes make a mistake? Art imitates life (I say art, cuz this sure ain't science).

Posted by: mrobvious at September 10, 2007 03:08 AM (8Y/fG)

11 Because of their BDS, liberals freeze up when they see W, and are unable to hit the keyboard. They just measured BDS, nothing else.

Posted by: Tushar D at September 10, 2007 05:38 AM (9ULFg)

12 good thing grant money is available for these geniuses. otherwise the national rate of unemployment would be a lot higher.

Posted by: ariadisfida at September 10, 2007 06:49 AM (hhL2E)

13

Im beyond caring

Chances of 100% Democratic control of the govt by 2008- High. Very high.

Even if Hillary loses, the GOP is going to get drilled in the Senate. Id bet the farm on it, if I had a farm. Filibuster proof majority is just around the corner.

If that doofy twat in MO can beat Jim Talent, and that bad rug wearing douschebag Webb can beat Allen in red(dish) VA, the party is over.

My only hope is that the tax hikes are minimal, (say only 1%), and that the nukes hit somewhere other than where I live.

Posted by: TMF at September 10, 2007 08:27 AM (KTgUG)

14 I wonder if the differences in the results were statistically significant?  I would also wonder if you could do a breakdown based on their majors in college.  I mean liberal arts majors and english majors and all that are going to be more inclined towards the letters anyways.  And an engineers best friend is spell check.  I should know.

Posted by: Buzzion at September 10, 2007 10:43 AM (fs3G2)

15 This is such BS.  Tests like this are used all the time to try to gauge attention span, especially when analyzing a person for, say, ADD. 

What on earth does this really say?  At the moment, only what that researcher wants it to say. 

Posted by: Hal at September 10, 2007 10:49 AM (RICf/)

16 Based on the results, he said, liberals could be expected to more readily accept new social, scientific or religious ideas.

Treason is not a new idea.

Posted by: JayC at September 10, 2007 10:51 AM (+1O2Q)

17

Why do all of these studies have to go to these ridiculous low-level lengths to "prove" the inherent intellectual superiority of liberals?  How about a more straight-forward study that measures, oh, I don't know, the empirical results of a person's chosen ideology when implemented throughout history and their corresponding refusal to adapt or surrender that ideology in the face of repeated, miserable, soul-crushing, mass-murdering failure?

I mean, is it too much to ask that a test that pretends to make value judgements about people's self-identified belief systems just cuts to the chase and looks at the good or bad wrought by socio-political systems based on those belief systems?

Of course it is.  Because then pseudo-scientific ballast bags like Sulloway would have to conclude that only ignorant, inflexible zealots whose fanatical commitment to their idiotic, counter-intuitive, completely-antithetical-to-the-immutable-laws-of-man fantasies is so absolute as to be immune to the horrors those fantasies have produced could possibly call themselves "liberals".

And that would make David Souter cry.

Posted by: VJay at September 10, 2007 11:02 AM (qEool)

18

This is the same type of study that says everyone was a racist if they couldn't hit the 'E' key or some bullshit like that.

All it really shows is that libs are more programable than conservatives.

Posted by: Iblis at September 10, 2007 01:29 PM (9221z)

19

If Liberals score better it proves they're smart?

If Liberals score lower it proves they're flexable?

If the scores were equal? THAT would prove that Conservatives were copying Liberals' answers!

Go figure.

Posted by: 5Cats at September 10, 2007 02:11 PM (Knaf0)

20 I think it proves we think differently. I didn't take it as the personal threat some of you seem to make it out to be.

Posted by: con-man at September 10, 2007 11:26 PM (/UrEy)

21 funny how no group of people have been proven wrong more times over the centuries than scientists and doctors. get me some leaches someone just told me the world is round.  

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