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I Am Woman Hear Me Roar (Kat-Missouri)

Apropos the previous post re: women bloggers (you know, the serious kind as opposed to whatever other kinds of women bloggers there are) and my first open blog post at AoSHQ regarding creepy dates, I will now become all sorts of serious:

In a world of equal rights and feminine liberation, if Obama has Obama Girls, where's Hillary's Men? Is there some sort of underlying discrimination going on here? Isn't it true that women with power become more attractive the same as men? Or, does that just scare the piss out of men?

Hillary with her finger on the big red button: Turn On? Or, total bed wetting fear?

And, you know, she has been completely screwed over by the men in her life. If there is a woman to be feared, it's a "woman scorned" and, oh boy, does Hillary have that market cornered.

In fact, men should be asking themselves whether Hillary as elected president or Hillary losing the presidency is more scary.

I mean, either way, Ace could end up dead in a park.

Think about that when you go to vote.

Update: And, in the middle of all this angst about under-represented women in places we think they ought to be, where are our feminista sisters empowering the women of Islam? You know, with the current death rates sky rocketing for Islamic males in certain areas, women out number the men by 5%. Why aren't we all up in that sh*t stirring it like a hot steaming pile of burning Beauchamp?

I know, I know...strawman. But, seriously, where are our seminars and such that remind our Muslim sisters that Mohammed was a beggar at Kadijah's table. She owned the businesses. She owned the property. Mohammed didn't even get everything at her demise.

Which, if you think about it, is a much stronger motivation to commit murder.

Update#2: Based on the comment section, only half of you got this post. It. Was. A. Joke. Note the prefaced, sarcastic "serious blogger".

I had no idea Hillary was that damn scary.

Posted by: Open Blog at 05:00 PM



Comments

1 Hello? Hillary has cankles.
Thus, no Hillary men.

Posted by: Stormy70 at August 12, 2007 05:12 PM (Y+o71)

2

Isn't it true that women with power become more attractive the same as men? Or, does that just scare the piss out of men?

Yes, they do become attractive to me, all things being equal.  Some of the most intense relationships i have ever experienced were with women who were not particularly physically attractive, but were smart and accomplished, whcih i found was a turn-on.

But I thought we were talking about the Presidency of the United States, not who do I want to make love to.  If Helen Thomas was a staunch conservative and a competent leader she would get my vote.  So would Hillary.  Neither is the case, and it has nothing to do with their gender in either case.

It is that simple.

Posted by: sherlock at August 12, 2007 05:18 PM (ojW85)

3 Well, they'd have to be called, "Hillary's Eunuchs" for starters.

Posted by: Joan of Argghh! at August 12, 2007 05:37 PM (8F+iI)

4 I think Hillary can have girls, too. Let's not make assumptions.

Posted by: meep at August 12, 2007 05:38 PM (LBCYq)

5 There are no Hillary Men because the worst she can do is kill us and life just ain't worth that much to any straight man.

Posted by: richard mcenroe at August 12, 2007 05:42 PM (lCheg)

6 Wow....did I need to mark this as sarcasm?  How many men are going to think that AoSHQ turned to the darkside when they read this?

Posted by: kat-missouri at August 12, 2007 05:54 PM (io+Si)

7

Well some guys are really submissive and are like to get spanked and boffed by with a strap on. Just saying.

Posted by: Joan Brown at August 12, 2007 05:57 PM (K6mO/)

8 With Hillary as President, frequent male urination will not necessarily indicate possible prostrate problems.

Posted by: cranky at August 12, 2007 05:57 PM (Xj2Ev)

9 Sorry, I'm simply not into beastility. But I've got a major headache and har... strike the latter after reading this post.

Posted by: TheEJS at August 12, 2007 05:59 PM (2QiX/)

10 FWIW, in pretty much all societies (before sex-selective abortions), you're going to have women outnumbering the men eventually, because men have higher mortality rates at all ages, even in those evil countries where women are abused horribly (because usually the only people who get nice treatment in those countries are the guys at the tippy-top. Men still tend to prefer killing each other more than killing women. Go figure.)

Posted by: meep at August 12, 2007 05:59 PM (LBCYq)

11 I think Hillary can have girls, too. Let's not make assumptions.

Good point.  I'd hate to be accused of dissing the ghey community.

Posted by: kat-missouri at August 12, 2007 06:00 PM (io+Si)

12 you're going to have women outnumbering the men eventually, because men have higher mortality rates at all ages, even in those evil countries where women are abused horribly

You know, I don't want to give away any feminist secrets, but I wonder if these guys know that there is some evil feminist plan to let them kill each other before we take over the world?

Posted by: kat-missouri at August 12, 2007 06:05 PM (io+Si)

13 Well, they mainly kill themselves more than other people, to tell the truth (and I'm not just talking deliberate suicide). Even when there's no war on, there's this huge jump in mortality rates from age 15 - 25 about, that you don't hit again until guys are about 50ish (and dying from heart attacks).

I've seen it in all the mortality tables I've ever looked at (I'm an actuary) -- I like to call it the "stupid period", but for some reason the men I work with don't like that term (not that they have anything better).

Most of the deaths at those ages are from accidents and violent acts...most of the time the guys getting drunk and doing something outrageously stupid. Also, guys are more likely (again, at all ages) to successfully commit suicide. (Come to think of it, all the suicides I personally know were of men, and all the attempted suicides were women.... probably because no guy who attempted suicide would admit as such.)

Posted by: meep at August 12, 2007 06:21 PM (LBCYq)

14 Come to think of it, I think the mortality rate comes back up to that level around age 40, not 50. There's a warring between the improvement in trauma medicine (e.g. treating gunshot wounds and horrid car accidents) and heart/cancer care (killing the older folks) as to when these things equalize.

Posted by: meep at August 12, 2007 06:23 PM (LBCYq)

15 Hilarious

Posted by: Cheryl at August 12, 2007 06:30 PM (2O8Ys)

16

Possible slogan for Lady Clinton's boyz:

"Sitzpinklers for Hillary Unite!"

 

Posted by: TiredWench at August 12, 2007 06:42 PM (Kx1hM)

17 Since this is a woman/ghey post, here's some appropiate music.

Posted by: Bart at August 12, 2007 06:52 PM (mr05L)

18

Mohammed was a beggar at Kadijah's table. She owned the businesses. She owned the property. Mohammed didn't even get everything at her demise.

Mo was the John Kerry of his day?

Posted by: andycanuck at August 12, 2007 07:03 PM (H5Wdk)

19

The libline in the Clinton era was that many men disliked Hilliary because she was a "strong woman."

Oh, yeah? So why did we like Margaret Thatcher and Jeanne Kirkpatrick? Perhaps there's a difference between "a strong woman" and  "a woman who is an imperious liar who won't release her academic records and repeatedly covered for her lying cheating husband"? (John Edwards, take note.)

Here's a slogan for the guys who support Hilliary: "Sully me down for Hilliary, dearie, Sully me, Sully me down."

 

Posted by: Ira at August 12, 2007 07:08 PM (GYlnp)

20 A truly bright, truly able woman is a turn on. Unless the guy is a nutless wonder.
Yet, Power is different from being highly capable and smart.
Power = matriarchal = ain't hot. (Unless you're that kind of nutless wonder.)
However matriarch-ain't-hot can be neutralized. Only by the woman.
Here's how.
She has to wield her power and her femininity harmoniously.
That's no easy task.
Most women are instantly disqualified as they simply do not  know how to be graciously female any more.
Very few manage to be harmoniously feminine. And for those who hold Power it's far fewer still.

A Powerful woman who wants men to think of her as hot will have to do something most women get away without doing their entire lives - she'll need to convey that she's does not merely find men useful, is not merely fond of men - but that she respects men. As men.
And not just the easy girly fantasy firemen, bodice-ripper, Lancelot crap.
Tough thing for women these days, as they are trained from cartoons forward through grad school and on to Sex In The City &c to disdain men.

It's been done though. I'm old so I think of Audrey Hepburn <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Audrey_Hepburn#Work_for_UNICEF">post Hollywood</a>.
Hell, even during Hollywood. She may have been born into grace.
Isabella Rossellini.
(My god! Wiki  has her lovely daughter Elettra @ 24 years old. I'm friggin' ancient.)
Why am I talking about stars and models? I can't think of a female politician who  is exemplary.
Look, I've got six real live women I can name. But they are in my life and you don't know them.
Angelina Jolie does not make the cut. She faking it. She may grow into the role. I hope she does.
Hmmm. I've wandered off the path here. This reads as though I think Angelina Jolie is not hot. Ridiculous!
Still, I feel like I might have made a point, somehow. So I'm not going to delete this mess.
Sorry, if you feel as though I've wasted your time. Enjoy this gorgeous evening.

A little too much Wild Turkey 101.
 
  

  

Posted by: Stephen M at August 12, 2007 07:08 PM (wdk1s)

21 Why no Hillary men? Let me count the ways:

1. She is ugly. Sorry, she is.

2. She is old. OK, not very old. But definitely approaching menopause, if not past it. Not a spring chicken, at any rate.

3. She's a harridan. Her principal method of dealing with any problem or setback is to get angry. I've already had enough manipulative female rage to last me a lifetime, thank you very much.

4. Hillarycare. She tried to screw me once. Why give her a second chance?

As for Hillary being victimized by every man in her life, with all due respect, Kat, give me a break! She and Billy Jeff made a deal: she turned a Nelson eye to his skirt-chasing, and he gave her access to power. If it wasn't for him and that aw-shucks, shit-eating, wink-wink-nudge-nudge manner of his, she'd still be ... what? My guess is a staff lawyer for some feminist not-for-profit - one based in a state where she managed to pass the bar - and author of a few books that were warmly reviewed in Ms. and ignored by the public at large. Instead, she stood by her man and now it's pretty likely that she's going to be elected President. And may God save the United States of America.

Posted by: Brown Line at August 12, 2007 07:23 PM (m+mvm)

22 I don't think it's accurate to say that men dislike Hillary particularly.  In this case I think it's simply that they can assess her relatively objectively and find her incompetent, unethical, and unappealing.  The weird thing is how so many women manage to ignore Hillary's awful qualities and allow the fact that she possesses ovaries to override anything else.

Both Clintons have a mysterious power over women, if you think about it.  Bill was the closest thing to a serial rapist ever to occupy the White House, but N.O.W. et al never uttered a peep -- presumably because they couldn't tear their lips off his unit long enough to say anything.  Hillary is merely a crook, a transparently unreliable manipulator, and a liar.  But she lacks Y chromosomes, and apparently that's enough.

She's not going to win the election.  She's going to blow it.  And the first woman President of the U.S. will be a Republican -- someone who earns the office on her merits and doesn't have to depend on being a feminist icon to get votes.

Posted by: Trimegistus at August 12, 2007 07:50 PM (muEZA)

23

She is fugly, Brown Line.

And her daughter is even uglier.

Chelsea makes Amy Carter look almost attractive.

Posted by: Bart at August 12, 2007 07:55 PM (w+7DY)

24 She has to wield her power and her femininity harmoniously.
That's no easy task.
Most women are instantly disqualified as they simply do not  know how to be graciously female any more.
Very few manage to be harmoniously feminine. And for those who hold Power it's far fewer still.

Blah, blah, blah...dude, You don't actually believe this carp do you?  Are you married?


Posted by: kat-missouri at August 12, 2007 08:28 PM (io+Si)

25 As for Hillary being victimized by every man in her life, with all due respect, Kat, give me a break!

Dude, you didn't get the sarcasm/irony part of this post?  I didn't realize I needed to put those kind of tags up on Ace's blog.  I thought it was automatically implied. 

Not to mention my snarky prelude about "serious" blogging women.

Way too many of you guys taking sh*t serious tonight.

You are complete downers.

Hillary scare you all that much?

Posted by: kat-missouri at August 12, 2007 08:33 PM (io+Si)

26

Don't get me wrong, I'd still bang the stuffing out of Hillary.

And Chelsea.

Posted by: Bart at August 12, 2007 09:12 PM (w+7DY)

27

You're allowed to post online from a federal prison, Bart? That's pretty liberal of your warden.

Posted by: andycanuck at August 12, 2007 10:10 PM (H5Wdk)

28 andycandy, where you been, holmes?

Posted by: Bart at August 12, 2007 10:23 PM (uOsCa)

29 Hillary Bart and Chelsea
now THAT is scary
Jesus!  Bart...!  Get contact lenses .  and think!  about the STD's !
Good God man, get a grip on yourself.

hmm...do I mean that the way it sounds?
Must be the FEAR

Posted by: bartfan at August 13, 2007 03:09 AM (Ghxcg)

30

So why did we like Margaret Thatcher and Jeanne Kirkpatrick?

When Maggie sent the Royal Navy to kick the shit out the Argentinians, that was all I needed to fall madly for her.

Same with Jeanne and her brinksmanship with the Soviets in the U.N.  "Oh, you don't like MX missiles pointed at you?  Well how bout we point MORE at you?"  Good shit.  Those two women were NAILS.  The only modern person in government with that kind of brass is Condi.  Kirkpatrick and Thatcher both had balls bigger than Bill Clinton's head.

Hillary wants us to vote for her for no other reason but that she's a woman.  Hey, there are plenty of women I can think of off the top of my head that would do a better job as President than Hillary or that sack of shit she calls a husband.  Condi, Liddy Dole, Kay Bailey, all would do a better job.  So no, I don't oppose Hillary because she's a woman.  I oppose her because she gets all her support because she's a woman.  If she had the stones of a Jeanne Kirkpatrick she'd have my vote NOW.  And ain't it ironic that she's pretty much got more stones than any of the other Democratic candidates?

Posted by: otcconan at August 13, 2007 09:13 AM (VtXBs)

31 "Dude, you didn't get the sarcasm/irony part of this post? I didn't realize I needed to put those kind of tags up on Ace's blog. I thought it was automatically implied."

Sorry. I've heard that too often from the hatchet-faced harridans of my acquaintance. I should take a belt of Val-U-Rite and lighten up.

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