Stupid Whore Contessa Brewer Thinks Jesse Jackson is Al Sharpton

It's written right here on my script, she says.

As Ron Burgundy could tell her, that's really not a good excuse. (Warning for one F-bomb.)

Oh-- and keep, um, plucking that chicken, Contessa.

Posted by: Ace at 06:10 PM

Comments

1 Shows what a "journalism" degree gets you.

Posted by: logprof at October 21, 2009 06:13 PM (I3Udb)

2 You don't even care about getting a female audience anymore, do you?

You're here.

Posted by: Methos at October 21, 2009 06:15 PM (mEJRc)

3 An F-bomb warning ?

Here ???

Posted by: Bill D. Cat at October 21, 2009 06:15 PM (vKdhq)

4
I thought she just called all us Reverends "Daddy".

Posted by: Rev Al Dullpoint at October 21, 2009 06:16 PM (Oxen1)

5 In my defense, they all look alike.

Especially when I'm down on my knees IYKWIMAITYD.

Posted by: Contessa Brewer at October 21, 2009 06:16 PM (ur6Ar)

6 But seriously, what is the difference between Sharpton and Jackson?

Posted by: Methos at October 21, 2009 06:17 PM (mEJRc)

7 RACIST!

Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2009 06:18 PM (4R2pO)

8 3 the misogynism on this site has reach epic levels lately. perhaps the morons here haven't been jacking off and are just releasing all their pentup frustration by bashing women.

Posted by: palin steele (He is truly too good for us) at October 21, 2009 06:15 PM (VDj74)

Meds, have you taken them yet? It's very important you take them everyday PS, even if you feel OK, you still need to take them.

Posted by: Jim in San Diego at October 21, 2009 06:18 PM (H7Rlw)

9 the misogynism on this site

Japanese tofu and sperm soup?

Do you honestly think we can decipher these polysyllabic words.

Get with the program: Moron blog, even for trolls.

Posted by: AmishDude at October 21, 2009 06:18 PM (T0NGe)

Palin, just reach between your sweaty thighs with a steak knife and saw back and forth a while. THEN you can flabber your lipsteaks about misogyny - after all, you're not a woman yet. Officially.

But white knighting a stupid turd like Contessa Brewer .. here's a hint, She won't blow you. You don't have enough nickles. So no need to ride to her defense as if you were a man hoping for a side slice, bucky.

Posted by: Inspector Asshole at October 21, 2009 06:19 PM (g+0JJ)

11 I thought they were both Velvet Jones.

Posted by: Sen. Robt. Sheets Byrd at October 21, 2009 06:19 PM (QKKT0)

12 Is this Brandman University for Buddhist monks and orange people?

Posted by: turtle at October 21, 2009 06:19 PM (tm/sN)

13 Not an audience of stupid whores, anyway.

Posted by: Original Roy at October 21, 2009 06:19 PM (ejHeB)

14 Journalism is hard!

Posted by: Contessa at October 21, 2009 06:20 PM (pZEar)

15 RAAAAACIST

Posted by: enoxo at October 21, 2009 06:20 PM (3HxIN)

And yeah, if a Fox News would have committed such a faux pas, we'd never hear the end of it. There would be screams for the reporter's head. Since Contessa is just a news reader, and she works for MSNBC, all will be forgiven and conveniently swept under the carpet.

Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2009 06:20 PM (4R2pO)

17 Yep, real professional. Just like Barry. You just say whatever the Teleprompter tells you.

Posted by: GarandFan at October 21, 2009 06:20 PM (ZQBnQ)

18 Yeah, they're both dirty [racial epithet] to you, huh?

Posted by: palin steele (He is truly too good for us) at October 21, 2009 06:18 PM (VDj74)

Point 1: That's actually the point vis-a-vis Contessa (with a "u") and her confusing them and

Point 2: It is interesting how that word is so easy for you to type. Every time you type a word like that, Baby Obama cries.

Posted by: AmishDude at October 21, 2009 06:21 PM (T0NGe)

19 Jesse Sharpton? Never heard of him.

Posted by: Charlie Gibson-Charlie Gibson at October 21, 2009 06:21 PM (euBwO)

20 perhaps the morons here haven't been jacking off

You should get one of those under age prostitutes I'm always talking up. Not only are they relaxing but you help them build a better life.

thanks for telling us some things aout yourself dum-dum

Posted by: YRM at October 21, 2009 06:21 PM (xNw7B)

21 #10 needs a banning .

Posted by: Bill D. Cat at October 21, 2009 06:21 PM (vKdhq)

22 Well, as I said to HeatherRadish in an earlier thread, I'm not so much a misogynist as I am a misanthrope: I hate everybody impartially.

And yes, Contessa is a dirty pirate hooker and she should go back to her home on Whore Island.

Posted by: Monty at October 21, 2009 06:22 PM (nTxjg)

23 Cleanup Aisle 10 (preferably with a banhammer)

Posted by: Just Another Poster at October 21, 2009 06:22 PM (NgoAe)

24 She's just pissed because Flava didn't give her a clock.

Posted by: railwriter at October 21, 2009 06:22 PM (XcsD4)

25 They all look the same to me

Posted by: Contessa Brewer at October 21, 2009 06:23 PM (4FkTt)

26 Desiree darling? Please scrub Contessa Brewer from all future invites.

Posted by: Barack Obama at October 21, 2009 06:25 PM (GtYrq)

27 Jesse's tonsils look swollen.

Posted by: shady surgeon at October 21, 2009 06:25 PM (PD1tk)

Posted by: palin steele (He is truly too good for us) at October 21, 2009 06:24 PM (VDj74)

well we could mention your disgusting remark about Jane D-Oh's unborn child in a previous thread as one reason

Posted by: YRM at October 21, 2009 06:25 PM (xNw7B)

Heh! I love how she got all defensive when Jesse corrected her. (I bet Jesse and Al really hate each other because you know there have got to be some turf wars going down in all those shakedowns). "That's what my script says...Of course I know who you are, I recognize your face..." Ha! If she recognized his face, then why didn't she go with her gut instead of just reading off the script? See it proves that the MSM has a script, and they are hell bound to it wether it's correct or not (most often not).

As far as Palid Stool, his concern for me, a delicate female flower is touching. This coming from the same clown who insulted my race (with his rant about foreign tonsil stealing doctors) and advocated child rape (with his defense of ACORN). The dismay you expressed at Ace's supposed misogeny doesn't resonate with me, and I doubt any of the other Moronettes will buy into it either. You sir, are a disengenuous fraud.

Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2009 06:26 PM (4R2pO)

30 I was being sarcastic. You can't ban someone for sarcasm.

Posted by: palin steele (He is truly too good for us) at October 21, 2009 06:24 PM (VDj74)

I could sure use some great material like that.

Posted by: Sen. Al Franken at October 21, 2009 06:27 PM (QKKT0)

31 You can't ban someone for sarcasm.

Hey dum dum, you do know there aren't laws about that sort of thing. You can be banned for cause. Like Dave is cranky or someone makes me a reasonable cash offer.

Posted by: DrewM. at October 21, 2009 06:27 PM (ur6Ar)

32 That was as quick as an unneeded amputation.

Posted by: shady surgeon at October 21, 2009 06:27 PM (PD1tk)

33 You can't ban someone for sarcasm.

You can't?

*checks the rule book*

Yeah, guys, he's right. It's rule 35. You can't ban someone for sarcasm.

Posted by: Original Roy at October 21, 2009 06:28 PM (ejHeB)

And yes, Contessa is a dirty pirate hooker and she should go back to her home on Whore Island.

No can do, Monty. We already voted her off. She's your problem now.

Posted by: The Inhabitants of Whore Island at October 21, 2009 06:28 PM (4R2pO)

35 Dummy is banned for racial epithets.

Please don't respond to it or repeat its racial epithets.

I like how after concern-trolling me about "mysoginism" (whatever the fuck that word is) he-she drops the N-bomb with aplomb.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2009 06:28 PM (2lEFM)

36 well we could mention your disgusting remark about Jane D-Oh's unborn child in a previous thread as one reason
Posted by: YRM at October 21, 2009 06:25 PM (xNw7B)

What's this now?

Posted by: DrewM. at October 21, 2009 06:28 PM (ur6Ar)

37 Hey dum dum, you do know there aren't laws about that sort of thing. You can be banned for cause. Like Dave is cranky or someone makes me a reasonable cash offer.

What is reasonable? Frankly, I think we should have an auction.

Posted by: AmishDude at October 21, 2009 06:28 PM (T0NGe)

38 @24

There are limits , asshole .

Posted by: Bill D. Cat at October 21, 2009 06:29 PM (vKdhq)

39 I can ban anybody for anything I want, asshole.

The N-bomb is always bannable. And you've been banned, you pathetic unemployed loser troll.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2009 06:29 PM (2lEFM)

You don't even care about getting a female audience anymore, do you?

As a female, I could care less if Ace calls Contessa Brewer a whore. If he used the c-word, I would be offended, but not with "whore." Girls call each other that all the time, and bitch is basically a term of affection now.

Unknot your panties, and get a life.

Posted by: Emily M. at October 21, 2009 06:29 PM (l7HvU)

41 Some of his organs have residual value.

Posted by: shady surgeon at October 21, 2009 06:29 PM (PD1tk)

42 Well, in Contessa's defense, I can see how she made that honest mistake. All those race baiting shake down artists look alike.

Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2009 06:29 PM (4R2pO)

43 Journalism is hard....harder if you're stupid.

Posted by: buzzsaw at October 21, 2009 06:29 PM (oCMdU)

44 Palin Steele? Never heard of he/she/it.

Posted by: Charlie Gibson-Charlie Gibson at October 21, 2009 06:29 PM (euBwO)

45 Oh, I forgot to mention pissing Ace off. Yeah, there's that one too.

Buh bye dum dum.

Posted by: DrewM. at October 21, 2009 06:30 PM (ur6Ar)

46 He will be missed. Remember ace you can not ban me for sarcasm.

Posted by: Thursby at October 21, 2009 06:31 PM (0o7RP)

47 It's the Shunning.

Posted by: spoken in a whisper of awe at October 21, 2009 06:31 PM (PD1tk)

48 "Whore"? That's offensive?

Posted by: Crystal Gail Mangum at October 21, 2009 06:32 PM (QKKT0)

Rejoice!

Posted by: Emily M. at October 21, 2009 06:32 PM (l7HvU)

Posted by: DrewM. at October 21, 2009 06:28 PM (ur6Ar)

baby thread the other day, w/ the chick who threw that baby away, dum dum made disgusting snarky remarks about Jane D'oh's miscarriage experience

Posted by: YRM at October 21, 2009 06:32 PM (xNw7B)

51 39 I can ban anybody for anything I want, says Ace.

So long as you don't go "Johnson" on us.

Posted by: sTevo at October 21, 2009 06:32 PM (eA3tl)

Heh! I can see Pantsful of Stool erecting monuments to himself: being a martyr for the cause as he takes a beat down from the Ban Hammer.

Ace you're my hero! Are you starting to feel better? (Because you're sounding mighty fiesty!)

Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2009 06:32 PM (4R2pO)

53 So Dum-dum pulled a "Kilgore Trout"?

Posted by: jas at October 21, 2009 06:33 PM (ZM2Bn)

54 No can do, Monty. We already voted her off. She's your problem now.

I got a postcard in the mail the other day from the Whore Island Chamber of Commerce*, and she's still on the photo. (You know the one: her in a bikini with a shit-eating grin, saying, "You'll find lots of whores on Whore Island!") So if she's still your spokesperson, you have to take her back.

*I got on Whore Island's mailing list. I cannot fathom how this happened.

Posted by: Monty at October 21, 2009 06:33 PM (nTxjg)

55 41 Some of his organs have residual value.

Posted by: shady surgeon at October 21, 2009 06:29 PM (PD1tk)

Our troll friend should be reassured. No one is truly useless, you can always serve as a bad example.

Posted by: AmishDude at October 21, 2009 06:33 PM (T0NGe)

baby thread the other day, w/ the chick who threw that baby away, dum dum made disgusting snarky remarks about Jane D'oh's miscarriage experience

Wow, unbelievable. Pallid Stool really is beyond the pale.

Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2009 06:33 PM (4R2pO)

Ugh.

Posted by: Peppy Bismol at October 21, 2009 06:34 PM (QNKb3)

58 is Palin Steele forever gone?

all the shit we've heard from dum dum and it took that to take care of him?

We should keep a special Hall Of Fame of Trolls and have dum dum in it, and save that Captain America comment as well!

Posted by: YRM at October 21, 2009 06:34 PM (xNw7B)

59 43 Journalism is hard....harder if you're stupid.

Posted by: buzzsaw at October 21, 2009 06:29 PM (oCMdU)

Actually, that's a common misconception. Just the opposite is true.

Posted by: Columbia Journalism School at October 21, 2009 06:35 PM (T0NGe)

60 I didn't know that... sorry to hear that. Both about the miscarriage and this unemployed cocksucker's vicious remark.

Posted by: ace at October 21, 2009 06:36 PM (2lEFM)

61 "Stupid Whore Contessa Brewer..."

An awesomely excellent description!

Posted by: Fuzzlenutter at October 21, 2009 06:37 PM (QYHLS)

62 Seriously, Rev. Al had to put her up to that. Not even Contusia is that freakin stupid.
MSLSD just might be making a contribution to civil discourse
afterall. The teleprompter excuse is as priceless as Jesse The
Pimp's expression. Instant Classic!

Posted by: ontherocks at October 21, 2009 06:37 PM (+cjXj)

63 De plen, boss, de plen!

Posted by: Tattoo of Whore Island at October 21, 2009 06:37 PM (ejHeB)

64 Unless you have been living under a rock or are as dumb as a rock, how could you not know the difference between Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton? Those two are such media whores.

Posted by: IC at October 21, 2009 06:37 PM (jZNCU)

65 Well, in Contessa's defense, I can see how she made that honest mistake. All those race baiting shake down artists look alike.
Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2009 06:29 PM (4R2pO)

Y'know, I made this identical comment (I think I said "race baiting poverty pimps,") over at HotAir, and my comment was removed by the moderator. That puzzles me somewhat.

Posted by: notropis at October 21, 2009 06:37 PM (bfd0H)

66 i would so hit me some contessa.

Posted by: butters at October 21, 2009 06:37 PM (Iy1fI)

67 This is what it was it felt like after ace landed his house on the wicked witch of the east that one time .

Posted by: Bill D. Cat at October 21, 2009 06:38 PM (vKdhq)

68 Ace, you should cover that Scozzaflava story.

Posted by: Peppy Bismol at October 21, 2009 06:38 PM (QNKb3)

69 Yeah, what Ron Burgundy said.

Posted by: The Broncos at October 21, 2009 06:39 PM (FhPAC)

70 Posted by: YRM at October 21, 2009 06:32 PM (xNw7B)

Wow, what a nasty bit of trash that "guy" is.

Posted by: DrewM. at October 21, 2009 06:39 PM (ur6Ar)

71 Yeah, keep fucking that chicken, Contessa: we need the eggs.

Posted by: CoolCzech at October 21, 2009 06:39 PM (QECjC)

72 I can ban anybody for anything I want, asshole.

Good, please ban erg, again. He's been more than his usual douche self today.

Posted by: OregonMuse at October 21, 2009 06:40 PM (eR37w)

73 You can't ban someone for sarcasm.

is now a meme.

Posted by: Boxxy at October 21, 2009 06:40 PM (QBQcg)

74 I used to like Contessa Brewer... then she blatantly lied about Obama's abortion record... still no need to call her a stupid whore....

Posted by: yarrrrr at October 21, 2009 06:40 PM (CRd2o)

75 Y'know, I made this identical comment (I think I said "race baiting poverty pimps,") over at HotAir, and my comment was removed by the moderator. That puzzles me somewhat.

forget it notropis, it's HotAir

Wow, what a nasty bit of trash that "guy" is.

he got a good licking from me and others but I remember one commenter begging Ace to ban him/her/it after that

Posted by: YRM at October 21, 2009 06:41 PM (xNw7B)

76 Contessa Brewer is a proud graduate of the Brandman University School for Orange People.

Posted by: Dean Vernon Wormer at October 21, 2009 06:42 PM (QKKT0)

77 To be honest, I occasionaly found Pounded Stool's comments amusing. I used to think she was actually a sock puppet of one of the regulars.

Posted by: Max Power at October 21, 2009 06:42 PM (q177U)

baby thread the other day, w/ the chick who threw that baby away, dum dum made disgusting snarky remarks about Jane D'oh's miscarriage experience

I forgot about that...he tried to use it for some argument about how abortion should be kept legal, then went he got pwned (as usual), he got really nasty. It's his MO.

I'm so glad he's finally banned.

Posted by: Emily M. at October 21, 2009 06:43 PM (l7HvU)

79 I got a postcard in the mail the other day from the Whore Island Chamber of Commerce*, and she's still on the photo. (You know the one: her in a bikini with a shit-eating grin, saying, "You'll find lots of whores on Whore Island!") So if she's still your spokesperson, you have to take her back.

*I got on Whore Island's mailing list. I cannot fathom how this happened.

Posted by: Monty at October 21, 2009 06:33 PM (nTxjg)

Hmm. I don't know how that happened as we never published anything with that Scrunt's picture. Even here on Whore Island, we do have standards. You know, it wouldn't surprise me if she had those printed up herself and pretended she was with the Chamber of Commerce. There seems to be a lot of fraud being committed and actors impersonating Chamber personnel in attempt to change our stance on Cap and Trade. As for how you got on our mailing list, no one here has your address on file. We can only surmise that you must have had intimate contact with Ms. Brewer in some poorly lit, run down, seedy establishment while you were in the throes of a drunken stupor. (Don't ask us how we know, but you know, girls talk.)

Posted by: Ima Hooker, Whore Island Chamber of Commerce President at October 21, 2009 06:43 PM (4R2pO)

80 6 But seriously, what is the difference between Sharpton and Jackson?

Posted by: Methos at October 21, 2009 06:17 PM (mEJRc)

Besides the hair?

Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner of Bacons, and the Occasional Meteor at October 21, 2009 06:43 PM (erIg9)

81 First half of her first name - nothing left to say.

Posted by: Hussein the Plumber at October 21, 2009 06:43 PM (r1h5M)

82 Ace, I have to caution you on your use of certain epithets in this thread.

Given Obamanomics, the word "unemployed" isn't so much of an insult.

Posted by: AmishDude at October 21, 2009 06:43 PM (T0NGe)

83 "CHART OF THE DAY: Google Searchers Are Obsessed With The Dollar Collapse"You mean there are two different guys???? Really?????

Posted by: hillary at October 21, 2009 06:44 PM (p302b)

Contess Brewer can't even tell when a "racist" gun carrying "assassin" is a white guy. I totally forgive her for mixing up the demigogues.

Posted by: California Red at October 21, 2009 06:44 PM (7uWb8)

85 Say, isn't that Charlie Rangel?

Posted by: andycanuck at October 21, 2009 06:44 PM (2qU2d)

86 still no need to call her a stupid whore....

It isn't about need. It's about art, man.

Posted by: Original Roy at October 21, 2009 06:44 PM (ejHeB)

87 PS really should have been banned earlier, but I see Ace's point of view that he doesn't want to go all Charles Johnson on us.

Posted by: Jim in San Diego at October 21, 2009 06:44 PM (H7Rlw)

Posted by: Emily M. at October 21, 2009 06:43 PM (l7HvU)

the ONT regulars will have no clue what happen though, i can't wait to see how they respond to the news, or maybe we should post an entire thread announcing it

Posted by: YRM at October 21, 2009 06:44 PM (xNw7B)

89 We prefer to be called "sex workers".

Posted by: The Whores at October 21, 2009 06:44 PM (FhPAC)

90 Poor Dylan Ratigan. Forced to stay in the NBC family and stuck with Contessa as his sidekick.

Posted by: hillary at October 21, 2009 06:45 PM (p302b)

91 Hic!

Posted by: The Ghost of Ted Kennedy at October 21, 2009 06:45 PM (i3PJU)

To be honest, I occasionaly found Pounded Stool's comments amusing. I used to think she was actually a sock puppet of one of the regulars.

Nope, our sock puppets are a lot smarter (no spelling/grammatical errors), and they are funny! He never had one funny thing typed out of his pathetic poo encrusted digits.

Posted by: Ima Hooker, Whore Island Chamber of Commerce President at October 21, 2009 06:45 PM (4R2pO)

93 still no need to call her a stupid whore....
Posted by: yarrrrr at October 21, 2009 06:40 PM (CRd2o)

Actually, there is.

Posted by: DrewM. at October 21, 2009 06:46 PM (ur6Ar)

@88

I think we should have a whole thread about it...I remember Ace used to that a long time ago with other trolls.

Posted by: Emily M. at October 21, 2009 06:46 PM (l7HvU)

95
85 Say, isn't that Charlie Rangel?

It's Maxine Waters, you idiot!

Posted by: Dang at October 21, 2009 06:46 PM (UA4gE)

96 30 I was being sarcastic. You can't ban someone for sarcasm.

Posted by: palin steele (He is truly too good for us) at October 21, 2009 06:24 PM (VDj74)

No, but you should have been banned when you suggested that importing underaged, illegal children into a child sex slavery ring, was a better life for them, than if they had stayed in their own country doing that. And by banned, I really mean shot on sight. You worthless piece of shit.

Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner of Bacons, and the Occasional Meteor at October 21, 2009 06:47 PM (erIg9)

97 @74: calling her that is just an ironic/sarcastic refernce to her ludicrous claim a few months ago that consevative bloggers called her a " slut" because she was liberal. The fact was, she's a nobody, well below anyone's radar: until she said that.

We've happily complied with the filthy, small bossomed slut's claim ever since!

Posted by: CoolCzech at October 21, 2009 06:47 PM (QECjC)

Contessa Brewer can't even tell when a "racist" gun carrying "assassin" is a white African-American guy. I totally forgive her for mixing up the demigogues.

Oops. he wasn't white now was he.

Posted by: California Red at October 21, 2009 06:47 PM (7uWb8)

99 I heard Contessa Brewer is a stupid whore.

Posted by: Dr. Spank at October 21, 2009 06:47 PM (TZazt)

100 late to the thread, and I'm thinking everyone's beating up on Inspector Asshole. Like, wha? He's a great moron.

Took me a while to realize it was dummy that needed banning. Still, leaving teh empty # would help with subsequent comments making sense.

Posted by: moron # 4362314 at October 21, 2009 06:47 PM (p1s9n)

101 Journalism degree....as useful as tits on a tree frog.

Posted by: buzzsaw at October 21, 2009 06:47 PM (oCMdU)

102

Posted by: Tattoo of Whore Island at October 21, 2009 06:37 PM (ejHeB)

TRAMP STAMP!

Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2009 06:48 PM (4R2pO)

103 GATOR!!!!!

Posted by: Bluto at October 21, 2009 06:48 PM (QKKT0)

104 That was just Eddie Murphy doing the role of Rev Jesse Jackson being mistaken by a bimpty for Al Sharpton. Murphy does all those roles and the makeup is AMAZING!

Posted by: Speller at October 21, 2009 06:48 PM (tXSD8)

105
still no need to call her a stupid whore....

Yeah. Not a need. Just a want. Because she's such a stupid whore!

Posted by: Dang at October 21, 2009 06:48 PM (UA4gE)

106

Say, isn't that Charlie Rangel?

It's Maxine Waters, you idiot!

You can tell them apart because Maxine's the one whos boobs have slid down below the beltline.

Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2009 06:49 PM (4R2pO)

107 I prefer jerkin the turkey.

Posted by: Contessa Brewer at October 21, 2009 06:50 PM (FhPAC)

108 Comment # 10 is twisted.

Posted by: Dr. Spank at October 21, 2009 06:50 PM (TZazt)

109 But seriously, what is the difference between Sharpton and Jackson?

Posted by: Methos at October 21, 2009 06:17 PM (mEJRc)

Besides the hair?

Now don't you even try and confuse me with Al!

Posted by: Don King at October 21, 2009 06:51 PM (4R2pO)

110 apologies to you ace, for bringin up that pos again. one thing that absolutely pisses me off is the thought of kids being used that way, and the apologists for it.

Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner of Bacons, and the Occasional Meteor at October 21, 2009 06:51 PM (erIg9)

111 We can only surmise that you must have had intimate contact with Ms. Brewer in some poorly lit, run down, seedy establishment while you were in the throes of a drunken stupor.

That probably explains what happened to my wallet. And one of my kidneys.

Posted by: Monty at October 21, 2009 06:52 PM (nTxjg)

112

Now don't you even try and confuse me with Al!

Posted by: Don King at October 21, 2009 06:51 PM (4R2pO)

Wouldn't think of it. Don King actually has a job.

Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner of Bacons, and the Occasional Meteor at October 21, 2009 06:53 PM (erIg9)

113 Unfortunately I have to pile on drudge here as well. Considering the fact that he is a self-admitted currency manipulator, drudge would be the first person I'd blame for major movements in the dollar as he has manipulated the currency in the past just for his personal profit and ignoring the hard working American while doing it. I'm just glad we are not blaming innocent people like George Soros or the federal deficit for the dollar's trouble.

Posted by: Just Another Poster at October 21, 2009 06:53 PM (NgoAe)

114

Oooooops! Guess you had better pop another Lude there Contessa, eh?

Zombies have a hard time distinguishing between other Zombies! Common problem in ZombieLand.

Posted by: Jimi at October 21, 2009 06:54 PM (ZBY0f)

115 62 -- Right idea, wrong author. The Borger post was the 'light bulb'.

The tastiest 'slights' always seem 'accidental'.

As I've said over at HA, when lap is only so large, lapdogs will resort to 'special tricks' for a pat on the head, or for space on the coveted 'lap'.

Remember, Ol' JJ wanted Teh One's nuts.

CNN just kicked him in the nuts, publicly.

Cause and effect writ large, in the Era of Teh One.

I'd bet a beer on it.

Posted by: CPT. Charles at October 21, 2009 06:55 PM (lYKj1)

116

Monty wrote:

I got a postcard in the mail the other day from the Whore Island Chamber of Commerce*, and she's still on the photo. (You know the one: her in a bikini with a shit-eating grin, saying, "You'll find lots of whores on Whore Island!") So if she's still your spokesperson, you have to take her back.

She's an illegal immigrant. She's actually a square-jawed slut. They get mistaken for whores all the time. She slipped right through Whore Island Naturalization and Customs Enforcement.

*I got on Whore Island's mailing list. I cannot fathom how this happened.

My wife can see right through that "I'm just a sub-moronic penis owner" line after all these years. Dammit. And it used to work so well, too. Kept me from having to drive to the in-laws' house for a decade. "Honey, tell me how this key thing is supposed to start the car doodad again?"

Posted by: angryoldfatman at October 21, 2009 06:55 PM (ZZg4j)

117 Journalism is hard....harder if you're stupid.

Posted by: buzzsaw at October 21, 2009 06:29 PM (oCMdU)

Actually, that's a common misconception. Just the opposite is true.

Posted by: Columbia Journalism School at October 21, 2009 06:35 PM

ummm....stupid you're if Harder....hard is Journalism?

Posted by: buzzsaw at October 21, 2009 06:56 PM (oCMdU)

118 "101 Journalism degree....as useful as tits on a tree frog.

Posted by: buzzsaw at October 21, 2009 06:47 PM (oCMdU)"

Haven't you heard the new masters degree in Journalism has a snappy new name: "Master of Science in Nuance"

Posted by: joe at October 21, 2009 06:56 PM (p302b)

119 Memories, like the corners of my tiny mind, of the way we whore were.

Posted by: barbra dummy at October 21, 2009 06:56 PM (2qU2d)

120 Is there anything to the unconfirmed rumor Contessa was caught having anal sex with a strap-on wearing Mika in a stall in the MSNBC men's room by a traumatized Keith Olberdouche?

Posted by: CoolCzech at October 21, 2009 06:56 PM (QECjC)

121 120 Is there anything to the unconfirmed rumor Contessa was caught having anal sex with a strap-on wearing Mika in a stall in the MSNBC men's room by a traumatized Keith Olberdouche?

Posted by: CoolCzech at October 21, 2009 06:56 PM (QECjC)

those picture could have been doctored.

Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner of Bacons, and the Occasional Meteor at October 21, 2009 06:57 PM (erIg9)

122 Posted by: CoolCzech at October 21, 2009 06:56 PM (QECjC)

oooo oooo the image, the image...it's dinner time....ooo ooo ooo ugh...horrible image, horrible image...

Posted by: joe at October 21, 2009 06:58 PM (p302b)

123 MSNBC

JJNBC

I like the sound of that.....

Posted by: Reverend Jesse Jackson at October 21, 2009 06:58 PM (5iQTe)

124

Contessa Brewer. I know there was something else she did that was irritating but now I can't remember what.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at October 21, 2009 06:59 PM (RZ8pf)

125 Fox news just showed a funny clip about pork. Cybil e us...was in the clip. What happened to her eye? She looks like she was in a bar brawl?

Posted by: joe at October 21, 2009 07:00 PM (p302b)

126 124

Contessa Brewer. I know there was something else she did that was irritating but now I can't remember what.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at October 21, 2009 06:59 PM (RZ8pf)

Speak?

Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner of Bacons, and the Occasional Meteor at October 21, 2009 07:00 PM (erIg9)

127 For Contessa, Dum-Dum, and the idiot using Wallace Stevens' name.

Posted by: Free Association Guy (rdb) at October 21, 2009 07:02 PM (QNKb3)

128 Contessa, you ignorant slut...

Posted by: Chevy at October 21, 2009 07:02 PM (uuZjB)

129

Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner of Bacons, and the Occasional Meteor at October 21, 2009 06:47 PM (erIg9)

on top of that the defense of Polanski, everyone should agree drugging a teen and having sex isn't OK, even after she said no many times.

Posted by: willow at October 21, 2009 07:03 PM (1kwr2)

130 93 Actually, there is.

Also, this.

Posted by: Alex at October 21, 2009 07:04 PM (8BkTc)

131 Just for the record, I was going for something along the lines of
"Al never read 'Green Eggs and Ham' on SNL."

I had no idea Dummy was going to go and get himself banned.

Posted by: Methos at October 21, 2009 07:04 PM (mEJRc)

132 101 Journalism degree....as useful as tits on a tree frog.

Posted by: buzzsaw at October 21, 2009 06:47 PM (oCMdU)

Journalism departments at every university should be folded into the department of buggy whip engineering.

Posted by: AmishDude at October 21, 2009 07:04 PM (T0NGe)

133 willow, exactly. Polanski should be tried, then taken out back and shot.

Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner of Bacons, and the Occasional Meteor at October 21, 2009 07:04 PM (erIg9)

134
51-Please, I don't want to see Ace's johnson.

Posted by: Katie Couric's colon at October 21, 2009 07:05 PM (Oxen1)

135 She ought to keep the dickinher mouth until she has something smart to say, which by the looks of, will not happen soon.

Posted by: lonetown at October 21, 2009 07:07 PM (u8fOP)

136 Is there anything to the unconfirmed rumor Contessa was caught having anal sex with a strap-on wearing Mika in a stall in the MSNBC men's room by a traumatized Keith Olberdouche?

Posted by: CoolCzech at October 21, 2009 06:56 PM (QECjC)

What do you mean, unconfirmed rumor.

Posted by: mikeyslaw at October 21, 2009 07:08 PM (QMGr1)

137

Cybil e us...was in the clip. What happened to her eye? She looks like she was in a bar brawl?

Had carcinoma removed from her forehead, her eye is droopy from the swelling, saw a link to an article on Drudge (I think?) about it.

Posted by: ParanoidGirlInSeattle at October 21, 2009 07:08 PM (RZ8pf)

138 The liberals can't be expected to remember all their plantation slaves' names can they?

Posted by: ghost707 at October 21, 2009 07:10 PM (5m3yt)

139 joe @ 125
Sebellius was treated for skin cancer, I think it was on the crawl at some point.

Posted by: Methos at October 21, 2009 07:13 PM (mEJRc)

140 Pics

Posted by: joe at October 21, 2009 07:14 PM (p302b)

141 Hahahaha, Tina Fey Steele, I'm still here and you're not!

Posted by: nickless at October 21, 2009 07:14 PM (MMC8r)

142 Odd, I still haven't seen my favorite Ace-started rumor about Ms. Brewster, as in she is "a cheap, sore-riddled nasty bit of gutterscrunge who'll rent you her mouth for the change in your pocket."

I'm not sure the Whore Island Chamber of Commerce considers this activity to meet their standards of excellence.

Posted by: Hoss Fuentes at October 21, 2009 07:16 PM (I9Jek)

143

3 the misogynism on this site

WTF? I'm an overworked semi-lurker that doesn't get to spend near enough time here, and even I know the morons dig teh women folk. dum dum should get the first brain enhancement, he is in desperate need of it.

Posted by: bebe's boobs destroy at October 21, 2009 07:17 PM (cniXs)

144 The script made me do it.

Posted by: Free Association Guy (rdb) at October 21, 2009 07:18 PM (QNKb3)

145 I'd hit it.

Uh, Contessa Brewer that is.

And does stupid add anything to the insult value of whore? Are smart whores better than stupid ones? Don't spare any details.

fap-fap-fap

And yeah, per the comment above, I thought palin steele was a sock of someone trying to be stereotypical. Leftist diversity always leads to jerks unable to debate facts or ideas who eventually hurl racial epithets in an effort to put words in the mouths of their opponents. Weird.

Posted by: Beagle at October 21, 2009 07:22 PM (sOtz/)

146 could it have been deliberate? I sometimes say outrageous things to draw everyone's attention to an issue. You know, when you are on a short leash, you gotta take your opportunities as they come.

Posted by: joe at October 21, 2009 07:23 PM (p302b)

147 Tales of the Script.

Posted by: Free Association Guy (rdb) at October 21, 2009 07:23 PM (QNKb3)

148 LOL, Dum Dum is accusing morons of misogyny after defending the exploitation of underage girls? And all the vile shit he's said about Sarah Palin? And Jane D'Oh?

Fuck you DumDum. You're not fit to wipe moose shit off Palin's stompy boots. Now go die. Either in a fire or by choking on a cock.

Posted by: ol_dirty_/b/tard at October 21, 2009 07:24 PM (IoUF1)

149

Haven't you heard the new masters degree in Journalism has a snappy new name: "Master of Science in Nuance"

Posted by: joe at October 21, 2009 06:56 PM (p302b)

Master in Science? I've heard of the Master of Arts in Baiting that is the follow-on to a BS in Journalism. To be a Master Baiter, you have to have have accomplished BS in Journalism...or sum such. Cont-essa Blewer seems to have reached the first plateau...and she probably has the advanced degree as well.

Posted by: buzzsaw at October 21, 2009 07:26 PM (oCMdU)

150 I can't believe that woman confused me with greasy Al Sharpton. Don't that fool know who I am? I AM SOMEBODY!

Posted by: Jesse Jackson at October 21, 2009 07:27 PM (4R2pO)

151 Oh, and Dum Dum, it feels great to post this again, especially since you can't respond and will just have to take the abuse like the little bitch you are:

Dum Dum, You're a Fine Bitch (sung to the tune of Brandy by Looking Glass)

On the Jersey Shore in a bathroom stall
In the midst of graffiti scrawled
There's a hole in the piss-stained wall
That's where you put your dick

And there's a loser behind this glory hole
And he really loves to smoke some pole
When you're done on the toilet bowl
He's there to suck you off

The hobos say "Dum Dum you give great head
You're our favorite little bitch
You could probably suck the chrome
Off a ball hitch"

Dum Dum's shift goes all night long
Ten straight hours of sucking dongs
At three AM he's still going strong
And he swallows every time

A man came in from off the street
with fourteen inches of swingin' meat
Like a puppy on its mother's teat
Dum Dum started to suck

With eleven inches down his throat
Dum Dum gave it a backhand stroke
At thirteen inches he started to choke
So he finished with his hand

The hobos say "Dum Dum you give great head
You're our favorite little bitch
You could probably suck the chrome
Off a ball hitch"

Dum Dum really loves his job and he's saving up his cash
He's hoping someday he won't have to eat out of the trash
And Dum Dum got a second job besides the glory hole
By day he works for Axlerod as a troll

In the morning when his shift is through
Dum Dum goes home and sniffs some glue
And thinks of all the men he blew
while he's beating off

The hobos say "Dum Dum you give great head
You're our favorite little bitch
You could probably suck the chrome
Off a ball hitch"

The hobos say "Dum Dum you give great head
You're our favorite little bitch
You could probably suck the chrome
Off a ball hitch"

Posted by: ol_dirty_/b/tard at October 21, 2009 07:30 PM (IoUF1)

152 This would be funnier with a bag of weed.

Posted by: white punk at October 21, 2009 07:33 PM (eA3tl)

153 ol_dirty that just never gets old

Posted by: Unclefacts, Summoner of Bacons, and the Occasional Meteor at October 21, 2009 07:36 PM (erIg9)

154 This truly is a moron blog, Painful Stool was an obvious racist from day one and only now has he/she/it been banned. Tolerance when applied to evil is not a virture.

Posted by: John Galt at October 21, 2009 07:39 PM (Ylv1H)

155 contessa NEEDS to be publicly humilitated untill she apologizes for all the things she has said about Sarah Palin. Shame her into it.

Posted by: Ben at October 21, 2009 08:12 PM (6S5Mz)

156

Cybil e us...was in the clip. What happened to her eye? She looks like she was in a bar brawl?

Had carcinoma removed from her forehead, her eye is droopy from the swelling, saw a link to an article on Drudge (I think?) about it.

People please she's clearly a tonsillophilic reptillian with designs even greater than the jooos'. FOX IN THE HENHOUSE

Posted by: Illuminatus Giganticus, MD, PhD at October 21, 2009 08:15 PM (aVQo/)

157 At least it's not misogyny-misogyny. Cuz then it would be bad.

Posted by: Dr. Varno at October 21, 2009 08:19 PM (0jQy3)

158

On my best day I'm a stupid whore, so ya think I give a hooey about Ace's alleged "misogyny"?

Whatever. I say worse about fellow women by 8am.

To all the trolls, as Biden would say, I got three words for ya: Get. Bent.

Posted by: laceyunderalls at October 21, 2009 08:26 PM (qhJdC)

159 So who had October 21 as the day DumDum got banned?

Posted by: Captain Hate at October 21, 2009 08:37 PM (oObEM)

160 Oh, I'm sure that Contessa really did earn her B.J. degree in Journalism from Whore Island Community College, cum laude...

Posted by: Chainsaw Chimp at October 21, 2009 08:39 PM (1NtHs)

161

Sweet, ps got the ban stick.

I shall drink tonight.

(1% of me will miss it.)

Posted by: MIKA at October 21, 2009 08:43 PM (I3Udb)

162 Damn. Sockpuppet off.

Posted by: logprof at October 21, 2009 08:44 PM (I3Udb)

163 Good thing it was Contessa Brewer and not that idiot Palin! Then we'd really have something to talk about.

Posted by: Iron Maiden at October 21, 2009 08:53 PM (hIOnV)

164 You guys got the wrong video - the one I just saw - the correct one, mind you - she reads the script wrong, then before Jesse can say anything, she says "The White House just emailed to correct me!"

Posted by: Iron Maiden at October 21, 2009 08:55 PM (hIOnV)

165 In all fairness i don't see much difference between the two.

Posted by: Wingnut at October 21, 2009 09:18 PM (HlSWX)

166 Stupid Whore Contessa Brewer Thinks Jesse Jackson is Al Sharpton

There's a difference?

Posted by: cheshirecat at October 21, 2009 10:03 PM (2LsNk)

167 You can't ban someone for sarcasm.

You can't?

Ace: Dum-Dum banned for racial epithets.

So, we can't, eh?

Si, se puede!

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Posted by: cheshirecat at October 21, 2009 10:15 PM (2LsNk)

170 Contessa Brewer? Isn't that the woman who got caught masturbating with a police baton at the Lincoln Memorial while watching Obama's Greatest Hits on her iPod? I read it on the Internet, so it must be true.

Posted by: 5th Level Fighter at October 21, 2009 11:23 PM (m2iXv)

171 Do you recall what was the feel, the day... that dummy died..

Bye, Bye palin steele and your lie
Took his girlfriend to the mall, but his wallet was dry
Them Old Morons were drinking Valu-rite rye
Singing this will be the day that he dies, this will be the day that he dies

Posted by: kbdabear at October 22, 2009 01:13 AM (sYxEE)

172

Well, in Contessa's defense, I can see how she made that honest mistake. All those race baiting shake down artists look alike.
Posted by: runningrn at October 21, 2009 06:29 PM (4R2pO)

The best way to tell them apart- Jesse cheated on his wife, had a illegitimate child, and paid his mistress to keep quiet using money from his charity org. Al likes track suits, calling for riots and was taped agreeing to a drug buy.

Posted by: Darth Randall at October 22, 2009 02:34 AM (98AOY)

173

Well, in Contessa's defense, I can see how she made that honest mistake. All those race baiting shake down artists look alike.

Does this mean that Contessa is barred from the NFL?

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Posted by: iowavette at October 22, 2009 10:58 AM (0JTac)

176 But seriously, what is the difference between Sharpton and Jackson?
Posted by: Methos at October 21, 2009 06:17 PM (mEJRc)

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177 That is a mistake anyone could make. They are indistinguishable.

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